#lierlide

❝ I continue to sink. The cold seawater rushes into my mouth, relentlessly squeezing my lungs. But what truly pains me are the chaotic sounds that flow through my body with the incoming waves. I tried sending out invitations to different universes — all futile gestures, but it was all better than nothing. If no one could give me an answer, then at least someone would accompany me in my fall into the abyss of self-loss. Give similar powers to those chosen, those who have also pursued beauty. As they gained strength, they would see a world that their former, insignificant selves could not have been able to perceive before. People who stand in high places take in more scenery, but they also face more temptations and are confronted more with making choices that no longer feel like their own. Thus, I was witness of how Verner, born in the city of Oren, brought an end to war, driven by his pursuit of pure beauty. Then, over the long years, he became increasingly cautious. Day by day, more afraid of the unknown and wars that might follow it. His doubts had led him towards an extreme form of peace. ❞

NOTES:

I just think it's cute that Louie's Dreamweaver motorcycle has the word 'KNIGHTMARE' written on it. Oh god, it's a pun, isn't it? Your Honor? He's a fucking loser, oh my fucking god ToT.

Anyways, the 'KNIGHTMARE' from the motorcycle reminded me too much of Bobo's 'Daymare' from the title of her Brave New World Hell Event Suit, "Daymare Fairy Tale". But it also made the light bulb in my clown brain go, "Oh. Oh. Dreams in a Dark Night! Dark Night. Dark Knight. Knightmare. Nightmare. OUGH! Poetry."

And after, by the unmoving force of my laptop's dead battery, having no access to the countless silly drawings where I played around with said concepts, I began sketching the suits again. All this just to say that the "Knightmare and Daymare" is just a re-draw of a WIP in my files. Hopefully, when I get my computer fixed, I'll be able to finish them off and post them.

Off tangent, though?

I think, my biggest worry will be if I improve on my fundamentals, then perhaps, the art of, ranging from what is now, many months ago, will seem... immature and bordering on being first drafts rather than finished pieces. I wonder if I will be forced to restart them from ground zero or just... leave them to collect dust. Or simply continue them from where I left off, but the change will jarringly stare back at me. And this wouldn't matter to me if it was only twenty to thirty WIPs but these are WIPs whose total numbers border on probably the 150s or possibly 200s, not including ones from an art era before 2022, perhaps?

God, how can I explain the feeling? A while back, I was looking at my art from "ya-know-nothing-yet" and though it is all colorful and lively and fun to look back at old concepts and AUs placed in the backburner, a large part of me could only notice the errors and the parts that needed fixing —an overwhelming itch to fix what I had considered complete. But it's normal, it means I have grown in my art to be able to notice that. And I could be satisfied with the idea of these pieces being completed, forever hanged up in the abandoned museum that is "ya-know-nothing-yet". I am.

The reason being that 1) because, my laptop suffered a corrupted hard drive, so even if I wanted to fix some of them, I no longer had access to the files. 2) the format of the images were posted using Tumblr's Legacy editor, a now-forcibly-obsolete-and-placed-in-disuse feature. And finally, 3) The itch to fix does not compare my laziness and the priority I held towards the current WIPs of 2023-2025.

The same cannot be said of the 2023-2025 many unfinished WIPs. Often painting in one layer may have come to bite me in the ass. The body proportions, god. Cannot even begin to imagine. But we shall see, hopefully. Always with full of hope :'D

Anyways, returning to "KNIGHTMARE and DAYMARE". Listen. Listen. Escúchame.

I've been stuck with this silly and absurd concept of a starry kingdom built between the uncanny separation that is wakefulness and sleeping, unconsciousness and consciousness, where dreams and nightmares slip through like needles into the veins of perception.

At least, that's the bare bones I have of it. Of course, Lierver|Verlier are present, and it is of their union that gives birth to the young heir, Daymare Bobo, with Knightmare Louie created to serve as the kingdom's defender, but tasked primarily with protecting her from harm, by Lierlide's orders. Still debating on whether they are siblings of the same parent, or just... have him born through the stab wound Verner suffers at Lierlide's sword of "Fate". Hmmmm. Much to brainstorm and contemplate about.

Then again, these dynamics are not that vastly different from the current one in my main AU, with Bobo prancing around the Cloud Realm and stumbling into the messy family situationship that Lierlide and Verner have burdened her with and exiting out of the Cloud Realm with a god-like-figure-possessive-of-her great-grandpapi calling her daughter, and total control of a nameless knight order that she can puppeteer to her own will, because she is heir to her grandpapi's blood powers, much to Verner's annoyance.

Okay, but what if I include Noah and Lunar, as belonging to the enemy kingdom. Or perhaps it's the same kingdom split in half, one side serving as the kingdom's ruin while the other tries it's best to protect it from deteriorating? Who ordered tragic Noah x Bobo and Louie x Lunar again?

Or if the story follows the little boy Nidhogg, the one in charge of devouring the world trying his best to overwrite his fate or something because he has fallen in love with the fairytale world that guards him when he sleeps, one created by a lonely Yvette. Or something. Maybe.