#ldsblogger

Have you ever wondered about the intricacies of prayer in the life of a Latter-Day Saint? Perhaps you're curious if it differs from your own approach. Well, let's dive into the art of my prayer life and explore the beautiful connection I share with my Heavenly Father.

Understanding Prayer in the Church: The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints defines prayer as a reverent communication with God, where gratitude is expressed, and blessings are sought. Addressed to our Heavenly Father in the name of Jesus Christ, prayers can be spoken aloud or kept silent.

My Personal Prayer Rituals: Here's a glimpse into the various ways I connect with God through prayer:

Prompted Prayer Journal: I've designed a special prayer journal that prompts me to express my thoughts and feelings during my sacred conversations with Heavenly Father. I use the following prompted journals 8 minutes with God and The emotion Journal. I also like blank journals from Zion's Reflections.

Mealtime Prayer: Before each meal, I take a moment to express my gratitude for the nourishment and blessings.

Silent Family Protection: Silently, I offer prayers to God, seeking His protection and guidance for my family.

Written Scripture Prayers: I write prayers directly in my scriptures, thanking God for the wisdom and guidance found in specific verses that resonate with me.

Verbal Expressions: I engage in spoken prayers when I wake up, start my work, and whenever the Holy Ghost prompts me.

A Unique Journey: It's important to note that my approach to prayer is just one among the diverse practices within the Church. Every Latter-Day Saint has their unique way of connecting with God.

-Neal L. Maxwell-

“In a blink of an eye everything can change”. Working as a therapist for the past 14 years I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard these words from my patients. It’s felt very surreal to see my own life change “in a blink of an eye.” The life I once knew was over and my mortal battle to survive had now begun.

Initially when I was diagnosed I did the most responsible thing and I turned to a reliable source ... google. I typed in such questions as “what is the prognosis of multiple myeloma?” and “what are the treatments involved?” The information that I received was both overwhelming and discouraging, and now looking back slightly incorrect. I think when you’re suddenly faced with a disease of this magnitude and not to familiar with, you immediately reach out to whomever and look wherever you can to feel a sense of control and also receive answers. Although the internet is a highly useful tool it wasn’t necessarily in this case 😬. In the beginning I was very resistant to “traditional medicine”. I had always proclaimed that if I were ever to be diagnosed with cancer that I would never go the “traditional” route, which involved chemotherapy along with other treatment methods. However, it was a far different feeling when I was actually diagnosed, I admittedly felt conflicted about my initial beliefs. There were many out there who offered a different opinion, solution and treatment plan. There were numerous documentaries that all supported every point of view from doctors and traditional medicine, to a holistic approach or specific diet plan. That any of these options would surely lead me to a cure. I really didn’t know which direction to turn and what I should do. I was extremely overwhelmed, but was gently reminded by a peaceful feeling that touched my heart and a strong impression that came to my mind that God was in charge. I just needed to turn down the “noise” or detach from the distraction around me and trust in his plan for me. That he would be the one to guide me. He has constantly reminded me of this throughout my journey.

It was a real miracle that I found my Myeloma Specialist. Jason and I just happened to attend a Multiple Myeloma support group meeting just prior to when I was set to start treatment with a regular oncologist. A gal approached us as we were exiting, she quietly approached me handing over a piece of paper with a name and number to a specialist that had saved her life. I initially dismissed it my treatment plan had already been set, but soon everything that I had previously planned began to unravel. Do you ever have that feeling where everything in life just goes completely wrong all at once? We soon found ourselves facing a difficult circumstance where nothing seemed to be going right or at least easy. We first found out that my current insurance would not cover my transplant and that the life saving treatment that I would need would cost $8,000 a month, it came out to approximately $380.00 a pill (and that was with the pharmacy discount). Jason was still out of a job and I began to feel a sense of desperation. That’s when I remembered the gal who had given me that contact info to her specialist. We then had hopes at this point that I would be accepted to some kind of trial. I made the phone call that completely changed the course of my future. It didn’t take long for me to get an appointment with the specialist at UT Southwestern which I will always be grateful for.

After my meeting with the Specialist they were unable to offer a trial that would allow for a future pregnancy so we decided against that. Since Jason was still out of a job we reached out to the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society who were able to approve my much needed and expensive immunotherapy for the next six months. Literally the next day after getting my approval Jason got a job. We dropped to our knees in gratitude, we both knew very well that the Lord had been integral in our journey. If Jason had not lost his job when he did I would have never received that life saving help.

My treatment journey then began which to my surprise, I experienced an extreme amount of sadness as I watched others around me continue to live out their lives normally. I felt heartache as I watched Jason and Jackson continue on with their life, often without me. I felt a sense of loneliness that I had never felt before. But there were also so many miracles to follow. I was able to put on hold the transplant and achieve an unexpected remission. I collected enough stem cells for two transplants when it looked like I wouldn’t even get enough for one. And my pain and feeling of loneliness were both eased along my journey.

“We become what we want to be by consistently being what we want to become each day.”

-Richard G. Scott-

Vulnerability has always been a weakness of mine. Therefore I am making more of a concerted effort to show up and be seen even though I can’t control the outcome. I look at having vulnerability as our greatest measure of courage.

The other day my son Jackson darted in front of an oncoming car. I ran after him and in a panic I grabbed his hand and pulled him back forcefully to avoid a potentially fatal situation. Jackson of course immediately burst into tears and became upset, pointing his finger forward he mustered in all of his frustration only like a two year old could, “Mommy I want to go!” he cried out. Through his damp toddler eyes he was unable to see in that moment that I was not grabbing his hand to discourage him but to simply save him.

I believe in a heaven sense that we to often see with “toddler eyes”. Recently it’s been more difficult for me to entirely grasp the Lords plan for me and for my family. This doesn’t mean that I lack faith, in fact I’ve never had more faith. But often times like I see with my own kiddo, I to can become easily frustrated and pout or even “throw tantrums” especially when I’m not getting my way! I am not always able see the direction that God is taking me, but I do know that he is taking me.

I feel like since I achieved remission that the expectation was that my life would begin again, not my old life but a new and better one. One where I felt healthy and also had a new found perspective on life. While I have found a new perspective I have yet to return to the healthy self that I once knew which has been so hard for me to accept. I’ve learned that through this latest trial that just like it was with the Savior, there is also great purpose in our own suffering. When life doesn’t always go the way we want it to or the way we think it should it’s easy to become discouraged. It’s taken a lot of hard work on my part to relinquish control and gain that closeness with the Lord and remain there. My life as of recent has been more about living with intention through achieving daily goals. Whether it’s living my best physical self by exercise and eating right, helping others even if it’s only in a small way or if it’s getting down on my knees and seeking out the Lord. These actions have helped me to find that inner strength that has led me to feel peace, joy and that reassurance that we all desperately need.

Asking too much of Bishops

  There is a great deal of chatter and debate in my circle right now on how the Church counselled abuse victims to reconcile with their spouse and keep the family intact. I find the conversation wrong on so many levels but not for the reasons you think. Now, I know for a start that the initial days and weeks of bad situations are a confusing and emotionally conflicting time and the recipient of…