#lamentaticn

❛❛  my misery is not so easily raised. i simply wish to relieve you of some of the weight you carry, ( @lamentaticn ) sylvanas. ❜❜ the implication was delicately put. palms upturned as plush petals formed a frown. knowing that the taller women wouldn't be so easily persuaded.

I was actually gonna add her to my multi deadass but then I chickened out!!! I don’t know if people would like my canon divergent take on her cause idek where I would be taking her yet I just know that canon muse = canon divergency for me soooo....... Uhm yeah sounds like I have some research to do aaaaaaa

@lamentaticn​ /  ☠  / accepting

    Seeing the signs of a struggle and eventually the open door had a BAD feeling sink into his gut.

    Niko knew his target wasn’t exactly sitting comfortable in his life, but it was clear that this didn’t seem like some sort of ACCIDENT or general disarray he had been getting accustomed to. Moving quietly down the hallway, Niko removed his combat pistol from his jacket as he approached the apartment door. He was thinking that perhaps the target knew what was going to happen, might have tried to make a RUN for it.

    Yet, hearing noise from within had him letting out a small exhale from his nose. This felt like some TRAP for a few moments, leave the door open and let him pop his head in and there would be one less Bellic in the world. However, that certainly wasn’t what greeted him once he managed to shift enough against the wall to look into the room. There wasn’t a SHOTGUN or pistol pointed his way for any movement, no, but rather the unfamiliar back of a woman who was standing over the body of his target.

    Holding back a curse, Niko weighed his options for a moment while he was still undetected. That was money out of his pocket--he wouldn’t get paid for a job he was TOO SLOW to. Yet, he wondered who might have had it out for his guy as well. Plus, it would be difficult to leave at this point without running into each other. Last thing he needed was to be treated like some damn WITNESS.

    So, he found himself moving quietly into the doorway, leveling his weapon at the back of her head. His first thought was to just hit the trigger and spare himself the drama, but it wasn’t clear if he should make an enemy out of her yet.

Your Thrall is exceptional?? I haven't seen much of it on my dash but your headcanons are cute, wholesome, and I wouldn't think be out of character. You put a lot of thought in your verses and thats really dope, I especially enjoyed your Dragon Age one. I'd be happy to interact some day but it is a joy seeing your content on my dash from after!

❝sometimes i think it’s getting better, and then it gets so much worse.❞ // From Cap. Riley

BLUE EYES ARE ON THE HORIZON. The auroras shine brightly as ever day or night. Colors cascade through fields and over mountains and the super bloom should be something he enjoys over everything else. The old paul would have ADORED the beautiful scenery as much as he could, but that was years and years ago in a much different time. Being on the other side of conflict is something that he’s grown use to by now and having Thomas Rush recruit him to keep the peace is something he takes pride in. 

The highwaymen as they are called are ruining this new world that his brothers DIED for. Joseph said the end was coming and they could all be reborn but Paul hadn’t heeded warning. Now he’s paying the price as is all the others who hadn’t BELIEVED. If he can help take back the county from the twins then he’s going to do his best. 

@yukikorogashi @ladysmaid @edenfelled @goetiya

It is in my belief that I was groomed as a teenager. This is the person that did it @/Notoriya or on her other blog @/lamentaticn. I'm not going to waste time, here is why I think

that straight off the bat. I’m dropping the most succinct screenshots first. It is honestly deeply upsetting to see how brainwashed I was at the time.

Now I would like to make a disclaimer. I intend on making this as fair as

possible. If I am unfair to her in the evidence, I will point it out. I will censor anything particularly sensitive. I want people to be aware of what she's done and that she's on the very same platform that I believe she first started to groom me on. I also believe that I am not collateral damage of her being emotionally stinted. I believe that she has a thing for teenagers. While I do not live in her head, the evidence here should be enough for anyone to come to the same conclusion.

My second disclaimer is that I was not a good person in that relationship. I'm fine with admitting that. I was a shitty partner, I was an emotional mess and I wasn't always fair. I don't doubt I've left her some scars. I will be upfront and say that's one of the reasons it took me a good few years to come out about it. The guilt was immense. I accept full accountability of me being unhealthy at that point.

For the full background, she first contacted me when I was 16. I was an at-risk youth. I had a

severe anxiety disorder, was been groomed before, and I came from an abusive background

I was fucked up, and she was aware of my mental health issues and my abusive family

before we got together. We got together romantically when I was 17, and the relationship lasted for around 5-6 years. I will now prove the timeline. While she deactivated the blog she used to contact me, and all interactions happened in private asks. I do have a full list of her Steam aliases to prove that the blog is hers. Interactions between us that happened in May of 2015. My birthday is in July. I am 26 now. She was 21/22 at the time. As I am using a burner Tumblr, I want some form of privacy. But let’s be real, who the fuck would care about collecting this evidence.

She was eager to engage with Life is Strange RP with me, which cringe. And of course, she

moved to Kik for said RP. Frustratingly, I can't fucking prove the dates there. I can prove that she used Kik, as she posted it on her own instagram. Frankly, if I knew I groomed a kid, I’d nuke any fucking evidence of Kik. For fairness sake, I will clarify that I am 18 during this screenshot. It is still wild that we had most of our conversations for a WHILE on the app that is famous for nuking messages. So, due to the nature of Kik, I cannot retrieve the messages. I cannot prove when RP happened, and due to my trauma I can't verify if ERP happened before I was 18. Dissociation, am I right? She was at least courteous enough to wait to receive nudes when I was 18. I don't think skirting the law is a particularly positive indication on her character, but I'II let the reader decide on that. 

Speaking of skirting the law, she did watch barely legal porn. Here's a few screenshots of

her admitting that. In fairness to her, some of the things mentioned here are actually not a big deal, and because l'm not a complete and utter cunt, I'm going to censor them. She had a few kinks in line with CNC. As I have matured, I don't think that's an issue in itself - It was triggering to me at the time. The barely legal porn was the beginning of the end to our relationship because when I was 23, I was working alongside teenagers, which is such a perception change. When you combine all of this shit, with her dating a minor, you can see the pattern emerge. I have screen recorded part of this, because Facebook Messenger insists on using a black line and it looks edited. Ultimately, most of these conversations happened over call. And I don’t want to drag up a lot of this because so much of her defence was blaming gender dysphoria. Which… shit’s rough for us enough, y’know?

This does not make a groomer by itself. I came to visit her in California (l was 18 and from the UK), which I can prove. What I cannot prove is that she rehearsed the lie I needed to tell her family. We were just friends, I was in my second year of uni (l was about to start my first, I was fresh off sixth form). She knew this wasn't healthy. She also pulled aside multiple of my friends and told them that they were not to discuss grooming with me, because it was triggering to me. Because we were all fucking teenagers, the red flag wasn't raised until adulthood. She was a dick to my friends as well. A lot of them did not feel comfortable around her.

She had very little boundaries with minors, in general. When I was 16/17, I made friends with a 14 year old as a teenager. Again, on a kik group dedicated to Overwatch. Ironically, I was the one defending and protecting these kids from the adults who’d try it on. While I was incredibly careful with how I interacted with this friend, Keira did not have that same reservation. She has worked with me to make this post. Bearing in mind, most of the screenshots in this section are during when A, Keira wanted to bring this 17 year old to her place, IRL to give her a monitor and shit. I also have evidence of her sending shit to her house. Without parental guidance. I had to tell her not to do that. She was also very eager to give this 17 year old her number. She also sank 80 dollars for a commission from this friend, which is just fucking weird. It is also baffling to me that she continues to RP on tumblr, after openly

admitting that she ERPed with a minor by mistake (the minor lied about their age). But that is a she said he said situation. Please keep in mind that the name used here (Liz) is one of the names she was trying out. 

While I could probably find so many more messages, I don’t think I need to. Looking at this shit physically affects me. I’ve tried so many ways to heal from this. And all I can think of is her continuing to use this fucking website to roleplay. I keep looking at her mutuals to see if any of them are kids. And I just can’t do it anymore. 

@lamentaticn​ sent: Two Parter. Part 1: Rory you're an amazing person and also amazingly strong and I admire that about you. I'm sorry things have been really rough but I can personally say I've been so happy to get to know you over these past like 7 or so years. Our communication may wax and wane but I know that I can always come to you and we can talk like no time has passed and I hope you feel the same. As always, I'm here for you <3 Part 2: Your Niko is absolutely amazing, its weird admiring a close friend's portrayal from afar since I know I can just approach you with random shit anytime. You single-handedly changed my opinion on him from this dead beat Russian Serbian criminal to someone with a depth I can appreciate and actually sympathize with. G.TA has never been an interest of mine but Niko and his antics under your talented writing is an exception to that. 

Also forgot to add: I'm stupid excited for our alien apoclypse AU <333333

how’s my portrayal? -- no longer accepting

Firstly, I am sorry this is so late. lol But anyway--

It’s honestly baffling to me that we’ve known each other for seven years (and that I’ve been on this website for a little more than half a decade lmao.) This is why I say you and Ande are the two people I fear retaliation from the most because you have a lot of dirt on me. But seriously, even if we end up coming in and out of regular conversation, I still really enjoy when we are able to talk and spend time together. You’re one of my closest friends on here and I don’t ever see that changing.