#kyw

Sol hasn't had a period for a few years now.

It took a frustrating amount of time after he got on testosterone for them to stop - given that every month previously had sent him into an aggressive and dissociative headspace since he hit puberty, and he'd never really realised what that meant until he got a clue about the whole gender thing. Every month after finally getting his HRT prescription he'd hoped. And hoped. And then when it finally happened and nothing happened it felt like a dream, like he could finally stop being afraid of his body and actually enjoy what it had to offer. He'd never slept with anyone but silly one night stands and Bill beforehand, but afterward he felt powerful and in full control of himself for the first time - he could shag, he was comfortable in his binder, he felt right.

So when he wakes up to blood on his boxers a couple of weeks after Eddy has his breakdown - a few days after he finally lets himself go off alert and actually sleep without checking his mate's still alive every hour - Sol freaks out.

Five shitty Christmases the Strays verse boys had, and one they all enjoyed together.

[happy holidays folks]

Sol takes in the lay of the land in Ed's flat quickly - curtains shut, trash all over the place, the stench of dog piss under it all as a new addition to his mate's depression soup - and feels a sharp stab of relief at what he doesn't see. No broken glass, no blood, nothing smashed up in the immediate vicinity. He's been behaving himself then, it's been a paralysing bad time rather than a getting angry with himself one. It's not better either way, but it's easier to get Ed out the other side if he's not actively fighting help every step of the way.

The lad's got himself into a right state, has slid down the wall next to the front door and crumpled into his boyfriend's arms where he's hiccuping with proper sobs he can't hold in. Collins headbutts Sol's hand and he gives the poor animal a good scrub around the ears before focusing on the situation proper, establishing quickly that the usual has happened: Ed's gone off his meds and fallen into a hole about it. 

It's not reassuring that it's happened again (he's tried so many ways to keep Ed on the straight and narrow - pill organisers, reminders, alarms - but short of physically turning up every time his mate needs to take a pill, Sol's on the back foot and always playing catch-up with it) but it's at least familiar. It's something they've dealt with, something he can deal with again now.