Cold you do an Au where the grand priest is dating our mom, Daishinkan being readers step-dad (platonic obv)? how would he react to having a mortal child, and possibly the angels to having a mortal step sibling? (I feel like a few wouldn’t want to be around their new sibling or be jealous they don't follow the same strict rules
The person who stalks my account every day looking for angels' stuff is going to love this :3
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You never expected your mom to fall in love again... let alone with him.
The Grand Priest.
He met her by accident: she wandered into a rift in space-time (long story), and instead of erasing the anomaly… he helped her home. She thanked him. He found that fascinating; mortals rarely thanked him sincerely.
He began visiting. Quietly. Subtly. Always at the edge of sunset.
And your mom made him laugh.
A sound the angels hadn’t heard in millennia.
Eventually, she introduced you to him, and something in his expression softened in a way no god had seen before.
A mortal child.
Mortal habits.
Mortal chaos.
Yet he adored you immediately.
And when he announced to the angels that he’d taken a mortal partner and now had a mortal stepchild, everyone broke into eleven varieties of confusion, jealousy, curiosity, and mild panic.
• No one has EVER seen him step closer, tilt his staff, and subtly position himself between you and danger like that.
• He watches you do small things, tying your shoes, doodling, complaining, like they’re rare cosmic phenomena.
• He doesn’t force angel discipline on you, but he tries to guide you without restricting your mortality.
• When you show him something you made, a drawing, a snack, a project, he gives a soft smile that could collapse universes.
• When you cry? He freezes. Absolute panic.
When you laugh? He stares like it’s art.
He won't say he loves you out loud (he barely says that word), but the way he watches over you? The way he subtly teaches you cosmic etiquette because you're "part of the family now"?
Yeah. He’s a good step-dad.
He bows politely to you — yes, a literal angel bows to a mortal — because you're Daishinkan’s stepchild. Shows no jealousy, but definitely watches you like you're a small, strange puzzle.
“Fascinating. Mortals speak before thinking. I envy that freedom.”
Sour is jealous, beautifully, silently jealous.
He doesn’t act out, but his posture stiffens every time Daishinkan treats you gently.
“He has never spoken to me like that…”
Eventually warms up and treats you like a cute mortal mascot.
Immediately confused. Mortals have emotions and unpredictability... things he considers "glitches."
He keeps distance.
A lot of distance.
“If I observe long enough, perhaps the mortal will… stabilize?”
Confused at first, but treats you with strict politeness. He tries to teach you etiquette like an angel trainee, but stops after Daishinkan gives him a look.
Over time, he becomes protective in a big-bro way.
Looks scary. Actually very soft with you.
He stands like a bodyguard whenever you visit.
Offers you candy in an extremely awkward way.
“Mortal child… must be protected. Tiny.”
Immediately loves you. (Not romantically :v) She finds you hilarious.
Teases you and Daishinkan endlessly.
“Stepfatherhood looks good on you, Father.”
Daishinkan: silently dying inside
Shows you martial arts moves but only the soft, safe ones.
Absolutely ecstatic. Whis LOVES mortals and their quirks.
Probably tries to feed you too much dessert.
Becomes your honorary older brother.
“How adorable! I shall teach them to cook— oh dear, they burned water.”
Does NOT like this at first.
He believes angelic hierarchy is sacred — and mortals shouldn't be close to Daishinkan.
But after seeing how sincerely you care for him, he slowly melts.
“…Fine. I suppose they can stay.”
Surprisingly likes you.
You’re mortal, which means unpredictable, which he finds entertaining.
Makes jokes you don’t understand.
Uses you to annoy Rhou. (I think that's the 9th kaio's name? idk)
WAY too excited.
Almost asks to study your biology until Daishinkan gives her a warning glare.
Still loves hearing you talk about dumb mortal things like school, pets, snacks.
Writes notes about everything.
“Mortals are inefficient but fascinating creatures. I like this one.”
At first: absolutely no interest.
She sees mortals as fragile.
After watching you stand up for yourself once, she gains respect.
Trains you in basic self-defense if you ask (Daishinkan reluctantly allows it).
Instantly motherly.
Treats you like her own child the second she sees you.
Gives subtle advice like:
“Do not touch divine artifacts, dear. They explode.”
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Summary: (Y/N) and Saiki perform a safety drill, and Saiki has to make sure his friends don't get tricked by a fake psychic.
“Listen up, everyone! There’ll be an evacuation drill today!” announced Hairo.
“Evacuation drill, huh?”
“Ha! I’ll be fine. I don’t need to rehearse,” said Nendou.
“Yes, he does,” whispered (Y/N), leaning over to Saiki. “Yesterday, he walked into the first-year hall and thought it was ours.” They grinned cheekily.
Saiki sighed. “Of course, he did.”
“Nendou, you shouldn’t take the drill so lightly,” warned Hairo. “Take a fire, for example! You’re surrounded by hot flames. The smoke makes it hard to see. You have trouble breathing! Now, what’re you gonna do in such a hot and hostile environment?! Can you make a level-headed decision in that situation when you didn’t even bother to participate in the drill?! Preparedness always pays off!”
“You’re as hot and suffocating as a fire,” said Saiki.
“Fires are great for making s’mores on a summer night,” said (Y/N), thinking aloud.
They wouldn’t survive a fire, either, would they? The psychic sighed. For all (Y/N)’s good sense, they lacked it at some critical moments. Yare yare. They’re all so troublesome.
“Anyway, when the fire alarm goes off, follow the instructions and evacuate to the schoolyard,” said Hairo. He was acting much calmer than he had been a few seconds ago. “This is a mnemonic created by using the initials for the important considerations during an evacuation. ‘SOS.’ ”
If I remember correctly, it stands for “Slow, Orderly, and Silent.”
(Y/N) brightened. “I was right earlier! ‘S’mores On Summer nights.’ ”
Saiki deadpanned even more than usual. That’s not even close.
“Oh, I get it!” piped up Nendou. “ ‘Save Our Selves!’ ”
“That can’t be right!” protested (Y/N).
Do they remember what it actually means?
“We should Save Others before Snacks!”
Well, at least they have good intentions…
“Well, I suppose, but…” said Hairo.
“Then, it must be ‘Someone! Over here! Save me!’ ” said Nendou.
“Do it yourself,” said Saiki.
Kaidou laughed derisively (acting dramatic as usual). “You’re stupid as ever.”
“What?! Do you know what it means?” questioned Nendou.
“Hmph, of course, I do,” declared Kaidou confidently.
“What? Is it ‘Save Others with Superpowers?’ ” laughed (Y/N), obviously joking.
Nendou laughed. “Good one, pinky.”
“No! It’s ‘Scorching Oblivion Smackdown!’ ” said Kaidou.
Everyone was silent.
“I was just kidding,” said Kaidou, backpedaling quickly. “It stands for ‘Slow, Orderly, and Silent.’ ”
“Yes, that’s right,” said Hairo. “So everyone, please remember SOS when you are participating in the drill.”
The PA system turned on. “A fire broke out in the science room on the first floor. Please evacuate.” The fire alarm began to ring.
“The sound of fire alarms makes me panic,” said Teruhashi.
“This is important. We should pay attention,” said Saiki.
“Fire, you need to Stay calm. Open your bag and take out your safety hood, then Stand in line in order of your student number,” explained Hairo.
(Y/N) walked over and picked their hood up. Since the buttons were directly under their chin, they fumbled with them. Sighing, Saiki walked over and buttoned it correctly. (Well, really he held his hands up and the buttons did themselves, but it was still Saiki making them do so. It counted).
“Thanks, Saiki!” chirped (Y/N). Their heart fluttered at his help, and they smiled widely.
“Yare yare. It’s just for helping at the sports festival,” said Saiki, looking away. He didn’t like being in debt to anyone, so helping with buttons would even out the food thing. That was all.
“Oh, no,” said Teruhashi, frowning down at her hood. “I can’t figure out my buttons.” Saiki will see me in trouble and help! Then I’ll thank him, and he’ll say “Oh, wow!”
Not happening.
A swarm of boys jumped to Teruhashi’s side. “We’ll help you, Teruhashi!”
“We shouldn’t wait around here! The fire could spread,” warned Hairo.
“If you spend too much time helping me, you guys will…” Teruhashi gasped dramatically and softened her eyes thankfully.
“She’s right! What is your guys’ plan?” asked Hairo.
“Sacrifice Ourselves to Save her,” declared the boys.
“I-I see,” said Hairo.
Saying nary a word they’d Offer me their help. They’re my love Slaves. Teehee, thought Teruhashi.
Class 3 lined up by the door and began exiting.
“Okay! Let’s start evacuating,” ordered Hairo.
“Oh, shoot, I left my phone in class,” said Tadashi. He began to turn around, but Hairo interceded.
“Stop, Tadashi! You’re Out of line, Stay in place,” commanded the class rep.
“He’s trying too hard.”
“Mhm,” hummed (Y/N), chewing on a snack.
Saiki almost deadpanned more than usual. They had marshmallows with them. No wonder they kept thinking about s’mores. “I feel like I’m hearing SOS in almost everything now.”
“That’s a Strange Occurrence, Saiki,” said (Y/N).
“See? What did I tell you?”
(Y/N) blinked before smiling. “Whoa, you’re So Observant, Saiki.”
“Stop it, guys. Obviously a fire drill doesn’t have time for Stupid quarrels,” said Kaidou to Hairo and Tadashi.
“Right! Great call, Kaidou!” said Hairo. “Let’s continue down the stairs! We’re almost there!” He stopped at the first floor. “What?!” The way was blocked. “Stop! The path leading Outside has been Shuttered?!”
“Seriously? Come On. We’d be Screwed if this wasn’t a drill,” muttered the discontent students.
“I wonder if the shutter was closed by mistake,” said Teruhashi.
“I think it’s because this goes by the science room,” pointed out (Y/N), still munching marshmallows.
Saiki nodded. How do they manage to be so observant and clueless at the same time?
“Stay calm. Obviously, there’s gotta be a Solution,” said Hairo. “A solution?” He became serious and introspective. “I see…I now understand the point of this shutter!”
“I think he finally figured it out, too,” said Saiki.
“We’re being tested! This is an obstacle!” declared the redhead. “During a fire, Sometimes Obstacles Stance in our way! In other words, to move forward, we must break through this shutter!”
“Isn’t it made to be tough to break?” asked (Y/N), tilting their head.
Excepting Saiki, the boys weren’t listening. “Alright then! Let’s break that shuttle!” The grabbed a fire extinguisher and a desk to throw at the barrier.
“In a real fire, they’d be the first to go,” said Saiki. He glanced over at (Y/N) and their marshmallows. “You might be next.”
They were blissfully unaware of his comment and just held out a sweet treat to him. “Want one?”
“…Yes.” Coffee jelly may be his favorite snack, but he liked other sweets, too. Alright, so maybe I’d save you since you bring me dessert.
Finally, Hairo, Nendou, and Kaidou managed to open a corner of the shutter and let the students pass through. Mr. Matsuzaki was waiting on the other side.
“So…You wrenched open the shutter and escaped through the front entrance,” observed the gym teacher. “I see…Who would break a shutter?! We just installed it! Are you Simpletons Out of your minds? Do you know what it costs to repair a Shutter?!”
“We’re sorry!” apologized the boys.
Geez…This is why I told them…Ah, I guess I didn’t tell them directly. Well, this school doesn’t need an evacuation drill to start with, though. Because…So long as I’m around, Ordeals such as fire Simply will not happen.
Yare yare. Now I’m doing it.
l
Throughout the town, the news of the House of Fortune Telling was spreading like wildfire. Apparently, a skilled clairvoyant worked there. People were loving what she said. Whether or not she was correct in her predictions was still unknown, but people kept on going to her, especially curious teenagers.
“Hmph. How stupid. Fortune-telling is just an illusion created by a bunch of people who pretend to be prophets,” said Kaidou.
“Wow, it’s pretty rare that you and I agree on something,” said Saiki.
(Y/N) nodded. “I find it hard to believe someone who can actually see the future isn’t being sought out by governments.” They grinned. “But I’m going this afternoon, anyways. I’m curious about what she’ll say, even if it is totally made up. It’ll be fun.”
“Well, forget that,” said Kaidou, “I have something more important to discuss with you two. Come with me after school today. Have you noticed? I sense a strange aura being given off in this town. I think Dark Reunion is behind it.”
“Whatever floats your boat,” said (Y/N), “And I already have plans.”
“That’s just an illusion you created,” said Saiki to Kaidou.
Saddened, Kaidou walked away. Nendou popped up beside Saiki and (Y/N).
“Pal, pinky! Have you heard? There’s a fortune-telling shop nearby,” said Nendou.
“It’s ‘House of Fortune Telling.’ I’m tired of hearing about it already.”
“Yeah, I know!” chirped (Y/N). “I’m going to check it out later today, ya know, for curiosity’s sake!”
Looks like I’ll be making sure my friends bothers don’t make bad decisions today.
If Saiki was being at all observant of his own actions, he’d notice that as soon as (Y/N) was involved, he was way more willing to wade into irritating situations to keep track of his friends. Acquaintances. (Friends).
l
Saiki, invisible to all, sighed and followed (Y/N) inside the House of Fortune Telling. Kaidou was with them because they had spotted him “in disguise” in line. The inside was made to look like a stereotypical psychic’s shop with a crystal ball, shimmery drapes, lows lights, the whole nine yards.
“Welcome to the House of Fortune. Please have a seat,” said the fortune teller.
“O-Okay,” said Kaidou.
“Alright,” said (Y/N).
They both sat down.
“I’m Mikiko Clairvoyance. Nice to meet you,” said the lady.
(Y/N) tilted their head in confusion at her name. That feels way too on the nose. Like a stage name.
“On what matter would you like advice today?” asked Mikiko.
“Umm,” said Kaidou.
I see. They seem half in doubt, too.
“Oh, my…I sense a very unusual aura from you, young man!” said Mikiko.
“What?!” gasped Kaidou.
“You’re no ordinary person, are you,” asked Mikiko slyly. “Do you have special gifts?”
(Y/N) watched the proceedings in amusement.
“And you!” Mikiko turned to the teenager.
“Me?” (Y/N) pointed to themself.
“Yes! You’re quite important to someone with gifts, aren’t you?!” questioned the clairvoyant dramatically.
(Y/N) shrugged and laughed. “Sorry, ma’am, you got the wrong person.” They brushed her off without a second thought. There weren’t many people they wanted to be important to, and having gifts didn’t go into it. Plus, the list wasn’t that long. Their friends, family, Saiki.
But Saiki’s a friend, so there we go, thought (Y/N) decidedly, brushing the way their mind separated him from everyone else away.
Wait…important to someone with gifts?! thought Kaidou. Does that mean…me?! A sudden blush overtook his cheeks as he looked at (Y/N).
Oh, wow. Saiki frowned slightly. He was more annoyed than usual as he saw Kaidou, even though he was just confused, get all flustered because of (Y/N). It just felt so…troublesome
“Ah…well, perhaps you’re just not aware of it!” covered Mikiko expertly. Not a good target. I should focus on the boy. She turned quickly to Kaidou. “You’re troubled by something! Am I wrong?!”
“How did you know that?!” gasped Kaidou.
People without troubles wouldn’t come to a place like this.
“Let me tell you what it is…” Mikiko carefully gaged what her predictions should be by watching Kaidou’s reactions. “A problem with romance…is not what it is, so an issue with your future and schoolwork…isn’t what’s troubling you, either. So it’s something to do with your friends and relationships!” She nailed it on the third try. “Yes! Your source of trouble is one friends and relationships!”
“H-How do you know that?!” stammered Kaidou.
You make it too easy.
“Most teenagers have that problem,” whispered (Y/N) to Kaidou, but he paid them no mind.
“Yeah, you’re right. That is the source of my troubles,” said the blue-haired boy. “I’m an assassin known as the Jet-Black Wings who came from a parallel world.”
(Y/N) sweat-dropped.
What is he talking about? thought Mikiko.
I ask myself that question every day.
“But after I learned the truth about the organization…” rambled Kaidou.
Mikiko nodded. “I understand.”
“I’m used to fighting.” Kaidou clenched his fist. “But sometimes I think about my life…I live in solitude…I don’t have anything I can call frie—I mean, comrade.”
“Aww, I’ll be your friend!” chirped (Y/N), leaning affectionately towards him.
“A-Ah!” Kaidou squeaked and blushed.
Saiki’s eyebrow twitched. (Y/N) was too nice for their own good, and Saiki didn’t need Kaidou having any misguided feelings for them. That would be complicated. That was the trouble. Obviously.
In an attempt to keep his attention, Mikiko said, “But he needs someone to completely understand him! You need a new approach. You should try to understand others.”
Oh, so she says some decent things, too. Maybe I misjudged her.
“Also, this will help.” She opened a box which held necklace. “You’ll be fine if you wear this necklace.
“What’s that?” asked (Y/N).
“If you wear this, you’ll be able to make friends with one hundred people and with Kento Yamazaki!” explained Mikiko. “If you buy now, I’m willing to offer you the low price of thirty-thousand yen.”
(Y/N)’s eyes widened, and their jaw dropped open.
“Thirty-thousand yen?!” cried Kaidou. “I-I’ll buy it! But I want to know one thing first. Will this make me friends with Saiki?!”
A soft smile spread across (Y/N)’s face. “Aww, Kaidou…”
“If you wear it, that Saiki guy will follow you around saying, ‘Hey, pal,’ ” said Mikiko.
(Y/N) blanked. “Huh?” There was no way that was happening. Plus, that was Nendou’s line.
“I-I’ll buy it!” declared Kaidou. He paid without hesitation.
“Well, well, good luck, now I must see other customers!” Mikiko rushed them out the door to the street. “Next person! Please come in.”
Kaidou regarded the necklace happily as he walked down the street with (Y/N).
“If nothing else, it’s…pretty,” said (Y/N). They weren’t sure it would work.
“Kaidou!”
Both teens turned around. Kaidou was excited to have his first friend while (Y/N) was just surprised that the necklace might actually do something. They were both let down because it was just Mikiko.
“I’m giving this back! I had no idea what you were saying was true!” she cried. She shoved Kaidou’s money back into his hands.
“What? Then what about the necklace?” asked Kaidou.
“You can have it! I bought it at a street stall for five-hundred yen!” she shouted as she ran.
“What?!” cried Kaidou, realizing the necklace wasn’t magical.
(Y/N) patted his back. “Sorry. At least you got your money back. And don’t worry, you’ve already got one friend. Me!” They beamed radiantly.
“Oh!”
The pair turned after hearing Nendou’s voice. He had just run into Saiki.
Kaidou’s eyes widened. Three of the people he was closest to were suddenly all around him. He gazed in wonder at the trinket in his hands. “So this necklace really is…”
Saiki sighed.
(Y/N) grinned. “No, no, Kaidou. Can’t you see? We’re already your friends!”
Kaidou blushed. “A-Ah! R-Right!”
Saiki was torn between being annoyed at Kaidou’s flustered state and enjoying how kind (Y/N) was. Those two annoy me, but you—he looked at (Y/N)—I can tolerate you.
The Simple Present are Stuttgart, Germany based musicians Cathrin Haller and Sabine Dangelmaier. They released a lathe-cut 7" on Kleine Untergrund Schallplatten (KUS) last year and now are releasing "Early Days" on both KUS and Shelflife (US).
The Bandcamp write up mentions Marine Girls, The Gentle Waves, Alpaca Sports and Sambassadeur as influences. I, of course, can't help but hear Flying Nun and Look Blue Go Purple [speaking of which, Superchunk recently released a cover of "I Don't Want You Anyway"].
Be sure to listen to the two songs ("I'll Take That With Me", and "Summer Triangle") from the lathe cut 7". They're outstanding. Both are updated on the new album.
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