#kujaku

Kite hanging out with the SWORD girls. Is she just trolling Hibari? Who knows *lol*

Super self-indulgent doodling once more. I'm not sure if I should even post stuff like this X'D

Modern AU, and since One Piece uses transponder Snails, Communication devices will be snail related.

0 - Prologue

“No”.

“Come on, what‘s the worst that could happen?”

“What’s the best to happen?”

“You being happy?”

“What makes you think I’m unhappy?”

“I can’t remember the last time I saw you laugh”.

“I think I’ve never seen you laugh”.

“Your face”.

“People give you a wide berth”.

“Your hobbies scream I am so single I don’t even try to get laid”.

Drake regretted asking, when he looked at the faces of Koby, Hibari, Helmeppo, Grus and Kujaku.

“This”, Kujaku tapped her finger against the crease between his eyebrows, “doesn’t help your case”.

Annoyed he shoved her hand away, “I have hobbies I enjoy. I like my job. My friends are sometimes annoying, but I’m happy with my life as it is”.

“Your face tells a different story”, murmured Helmeppo over the rim of his drink.

“What is wrong with my face?”, drake  asked, slightly exasperated.

“The corners of happy people’s mouths point upwards, not downwards”, Grus said, jumping to the blonde’s aid.

“The reasons for that are sitting around this table”, Drake mumbled into his beer.

“We just mean well”, Koby tried to reassure him.

Drake sighted. He believed him and Hibari, but he doubted the other’s intentions’ “and how exactly would a girlfriend help with that?”

Hibari tapped her index fingers together, “wouldn’t it be nice if there where someone waiting for you at home-“

“I already have that”

“A human, who makes you smile? Asks how your day’s been?”, she continued and squinted towards Koby.

“I don’t want to talk about my day, when I get home”, he wanted to read his comic books, maybe play a game, and on his days off visit the planetarium. Or a museum. Or a library. He wanted peace and quiet.

“Well Hibari, Drake’s different from us normal and social functioning people”, Helmeppo said putting an arm around her shoulders, “he wants to brood in his solitude and only leaves his cave, when we drag him out”

“My flat is nice”

“Sure, if you enjoy living in a terrarium”, Grus said, balancing his chair on two legs.

Drake remained silent and sipped his beer.

“Wouldn’t it be nice if there would be someone supporting you right now?”, Kujaku elbowed him slightly.

With a defeated sigh the three his phone on the table, “fine, if it’ll make you leave me alone, get me that stupid app”.

~~~~~~~~~

Two weeks later Drake regretted that decision. It has been a bad idea. Technically he didn’t care, but it annoyed him. They wouldn’t leave him alone. Ever since his mobilphone had been ringing continuously. it wasn’t the app, but his friends, besieging him with messages. Even if he didn’t meet up with them, they had no other topic. This evening was no different.

“Hot, cute, no, kinda nice, oh my god what is that? Cute, cute, oh she’s my type,…” Helmeppo commented while swiping across Drake’s phone.

“That one has a cat in her picture, how about her?”, Grus at least seemed to have his interests in mind, though none of them deemed it necessary to show him what they were doing. But since he hasn’t used the app once since they installed it, he apparently had lost the right to have a say.

“You’ll message the women, if you have a match, right?”, asked his supposed best friend.

“Yeah yeah, whatever”, he said not taking his gaze off Grus unreasonable giant television, where he was slaughtering virtual Zombie hordes.

“Your yeah yeah sounds more like kiss my ass”

“Feel free”

“If you’re that desperate, you could’ve have used Snailer”

“If were desperate I’d just talk to someone”

“Sure”, Helmeppo rolled his eyes, “because you are such a chick magnet, smelling like dung and covered in hair”

“I shower when I come home”, Drake defended himself, “besides, reptiles don’t shed”

“What does flr mean?”, interrupted Grus.

“Lfr”, Drake corrected immediately, “looking for raid”

Helmeppo shook his head “female led relationship”.

“Now I see what Kujaku meant about his hobbies”, whispered Grus.

Drake paused the video game and sent his friends an accusatory glance, “you said you wanted to play some games together again” 

“No, I asked if you wanted to come over to play some games at Grus’ place”, grinned Helmeppo and gesturing towards the fancy penthouse suite, “enjoy it, you won’t find better equipment anywhere”.

Grus patted his back in camaraderie, “you do what you like and we’ll make sure you get someone warm blooded in your bedroom for once”.