tysm for writing and posting, I really love all of your work!
quick question just for fun: if someone could only read five of your fics and no more, and you got to pick which ones, which five would you want them to read? you can include wips if you want
happy writing and i can’t wait for your next update!
anon i am so sorry for the late reply, i just. had to think about this a LOT. then i may or may not have forgot about it. oops. but thank you so much for the submission and for enjoying my fics!!
ok we are NOT including wips because that would make this answer infinitely harder. also because i can’t really judge them because… they’re not… done. im also not counting i want your violence, since it's not finished. i AM including kim suhwan vs. the world, however, because it's essentially finished. so i'm picking out of my 25 fics. that being said, here is my list of my 5 fics i would want people to read:
kim suhwan vs. the world
all my love
the mouth of the wolf, the eyes of the lamb
and all of my dreams, they’re growing lucid (i mean, can we do two here? just the whole busan boy series. this and the beach.)
don’t blame me
pour one out for the fakenuts sure, but i havent written one im incredibly proud of yet. if the one im working on turns out good, then well… 😶🌫️ but thats neither here nor there since it is NOT FINISHED and i dont wanna torture myself with choosing.. really op i have 26 published fics and ur making me choose FIVE of 25. ok, i will delve into my reasoning under here.
ahem. so, to start with... kim suhwan vs. the world. i feel like this one is a little self-explanatory, if only because it's my most recent fic. i do think it's one of my best written (my older fics are definitely lacking in skill, i didn't get good at writing until late 2023 i'd say) and i just... love the plot. so writing quality is great, concept also great! description amazing, dialogue amazing. my best work so far... i guess that makes sense, since im improving in skill as i write and grow more. i love peyz. i love writing fics about love and growing up and coming of age, and okay i DID project a bit onto peyz because i too have an unrequited crush and uh... i struggle with my emotions being a "lot" a lot. especially as of late, ive been "feeling" a lot. i get angry, i get sad. i mean my dad died lol! (i do sort of separate my fics nowadays as pre-dad death and post) but this story is just so special to me. you can see my growth as a person and a writer in comparison to my first fics. i mean, its been two years, pretty much. suhwan here is so special to me, and so is jihoon, honestly. wangho is too, and... god i do love geng 2023 so much. AGH. i know chapter 5 isn't out yet, but it will be tonight, or tomorrow! before t1 geng semis, at least. i hope.
next, all my love. also self-explanatory i think. it's my most popular fic, and even though i don't even really like onerzeus, i love this story and i love my iteration of them. i really badly wanted to write a second chance homecoming story (fun fact, aml was almost a bengifaker instead of onerzeus!) and i ended up doing that. i chose onerzeus since i thought they fit it. and then the fic sorta snowballed. i initially wanted 3 chapters, 10k each, 30k total word count. hoo boy that didn't happen LOL. EVERYTHING snowballed. i started putting all my favorite music in it, and putting cars and stick shifts in, and making the almost-family have an auto shop. i put jojopyun in bc i fucking love the guy so, so much. i put many bits of myself and my dad into it (i look back on this fic with a tad bit of sentimentality because it has so much of him in it. i did write that fic before he died). but i put just.. things i wanted to put in. it was SO self indulgent! gumakeria marriage, jojopyun, music, and cars... i remember working super hard on this fic in particular, and i think it paid off. all the "surprises"/cliffhanger type-things were something i put a lot work into. i think the writing quality of this fic is... halfway decent/pretty good... description was almost amazing, and dialogue was pretty good. conceptually, one of my best. this fic will always be special to me.
next would (maybe surprisingly?) be the mouth of the wolf, the eyes of the lamb. conceptually, i believe this is my best fic conceptually, which is why i chose it. i really don't think this shows my best writing at all (not even top 5 best writing) but i think i execute the CONCEPT well regardless! i did write it in pretty much one sitting because i was in the midst of burnout and i just got the idea and knew i had to get it out, so that's my excuse on the sub-par writing quality and possibly choppy plotline. it has pretty okay description, not bad dialogue. i definitely could've made it smoother. but in general, i just love the "lck mid holy trinity" of faker, showmaker, and chovy. i love lck midlaners so much. the idea of showmaker and chovy being kindred and faker the grey man descended upon me like a blessing from the gods. BY GOD DID I COOK. i didn't write a ton of au fics prior to this fic (ntm any fantasy aus), but i really should more. i love it so much, and i love the ending (which i wrote at like 4 am in the morning in a haze because i randomly thought of it half asleep!) i'm super proud of this conceptually and i need to write more lck mid fics in general (this time with scout too!?)
okay, i really wish i could count the busan boy series as one. but i cannot, so i am choosing and all of my dreams, they're growing lucid. despite it ill be talking about both fics in this section. i think this is my best work slash series of canon-compliant gumakeria i've written thus far--(i haven't written a ton since it came out, if at all, honestly). i feel like i really perfected their characterization here, over writing so much gumakeria. the reason i pick aaomdtgl over the beach is probably writing quality/skill. busan boy is by far my "favorite" of the two concepts, but it's lacking in execution, and it's noticeable especially in comparison to its sequel. the beach has okay writing, pretty decent description, and amazing concept. and all of my dreams has great writing, great description, and great concept. i was always grumpy the beach got so much less attention than and all of my dreams, but... i guess it's for a reason, lol (also bc its um. SAD! they LOSE!). (please go read the beach if you haven't though... i do love that fic so, so much.) also stream niki and the neighbourhood... read! my first songfics i guess, i just love those two albums. also i was a tad bit insane for these two fics--i wrote the beach because i was like, worlds in Korea? lets win. time to write losing in Korea fic first to set up for it. then i wrote a large percentage of and all of my dreams before t1 even won worlds because i was so sure of it. 2023 gwen was insane.
lastly is don't blame me. this is largely because of concept, because the writing is ass. don't blame me was my second published fic, so that's my excuse. the writing IS bad, i was waltzing along lacking in skill... yeah. the prose is so short and empty and fucking hell i could nitpick all day. i guess it sort of fits the fic?? (no im lying to myself lol it just sucks.) the description is meh, the dialogue gets the point across. but CONCEPTUALLY... the fic eats! it slays! demon keria yes pls! good job 2023 gwen! you did slay! my au fics do slay, and i had so much fun with this. i really fell into the rabbithole of league lore... god i love it so much. it's just so fun to write. and the ending! i love the ending a lot and i just like the tone and mood of the fic. i mean, its chilly, a little haunting... im not sure. dbm still has unwritten sequels LMAO i may or may not choose to write... i want to, but it's been a long time... i guess only time will tell.
so... yeah! that'd be my list. if you're interested in hearing why i DIDNT include some (one) fic, keep reading :] (wjnstt was the only one i wanted to address.)
now i think the main question to myself when choosing was... do i include we just need some time together or not? i know its a rather popular fic of mine, but i nixed it in favor of dbm i guess because i prefer dbm. and in terms of canon compliant gumakeria, busan boy clears it and does it a whole lot better in everything (characterization, writing quality, dynamic, everything). i don't... like wjnstt, not really. i mean, i haven't read it in a long while, so i couldn't tell u if that's 100% accurate of a conclusion, but. it was the first fic i ever started writing, and you can TELL. hoo boy writing quality be IN THE GUTTER. oh my GOD. to be fair, again, i haven't read it in a while so my judgment is probably a bit skewed/i could be misremembering. but i haven't reread it because IM SCARED OF IT. IM GOING TO GET SO MUCH SECONDHAND EMBARASSMENT AND CRINGE AT MYSELF OH GOD. ITS SO ASS. FUCKING HELL. my characterization is kinda ass (all of the characters), my writing quality/skill is unpolished... so many things. my description is okay... meh... i guess. my dialogue is probably the best part of the fic, and that's only halfway decent. but at the same time, i remember pouring my heart into this fic. i really do. conceptually, i think it was okay, and i remember it meaning a lot to me. i guess i just... sort of grew up and out of it. i mean, its been two years, pretty much. i wrote it in the midst of a bad depression slump, and i was younger, and... a lot changed since then, bascially. okay maybe i should reread it. fuck. we'll see i guess. i have a love hate relationship with this fic, that's all ill say for now. it'd probably make... top 6 or top 7. yeah. not sure. not top 5 though, sorry.
anyway, thank you so much for the question again op, and i'm so sorry for the late reply! and for yapping. i yapped a lot. hopefully you liked reading it though. much love, hope you have an amazing day, and let's gear up for worlds semis this weekend!!
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kim suhwan vs. the world chapter 3 is out! this ones kinda a long one, around 14k. covers summer and worlds 2023. a bit angsty? coming of age shit... yeah. his immaturity shows in this chapter. nothing else to say: read if you want to, and enjoy!
hiii, I just read the entirety of kim suhwan vs. the world in one sitting and then reread again and profusely sobbed the whole way through. I know you wrote it awhile ago, but it happened to find me right now, as i am in love with my best friend (who probably doesn’t feel that way about me LOL) so it instantly KO’d me.
thank you for writing it; the shame and guilt and the unfounded anger that just gets vomited at the people you care about was too real. I know I’ve been suhwan for the last year of my life, and my feelings have just been eating me up inside. Every line of suhwans internal dialogue lined up all of the thoughts I’ve had recently. this fic really helped me compartmentalize what i was doing to myself. like suhwans whole stubborn denial about being difficult and refusing to get close to anyone after his Original Wound made me want to shake him. and then i was like, oh that’s what I’ve been doing.
i think im finally going to confess to my friend after bottling my feelings for the last 3 years. i know i need to finally move out from my sandcastle. this story truly just changed the trajectory of my life. please never stop.
op!! thank you so much for your message you dont even begin to understand how happy it made me. i actually went and reread this fic after first getting your inbox yesterday (well--i skimmed through a lot of it. that fic is def past it's expiration date for me, but i think it's a shelf-stable item like tinned fish rather than a perishable: you can still eat it, it's still okay). i truly fully get it, though. i was in love with MYY best friend when i wrote this fic (my too-long cringey authors notes on the fic overshare this ..) so i am glad it can bring comfort to someone else going through that as well.
it's funny how you say this story helped you compartmentalize because it helped me do the same thing: if i think back to 2024, writing it gave me the catharsis and closure i needed to properly get over my crush. that being said, i never did um. tell her i liked her. KUDOS TO YOU FOR BEING BRAVE ENOUGH!! i give you all the support in the world op, stay strong <3<3 you got this.
you are very very welcome for writing the fic; though i don't think it's something to be thanked for, as i created with no selfless intent. again, i'm just happy it found somebody it's perfect for. good luck and stay safe. i love you xx gwen
reading your suhwan vs the world fic made him feel so real to me and now with all of the geng ruler news it feels so heartbreaking that peyz is going to go through all that by himself :(
i… i know… like what he was supposed to get a HAPPY ENDING. ???? AFTER ALLAT? but i guess.. in a way this can be one as well since he’s leaving and growing and really out there facing. well yk. [THE WORLD.] i still sk where hes gonna go, whether it be kt or the lpl i guess we have to wait and see 😭 ill be watching and cheering for him either way tho!!
Are you going to write more maolan? I really want to know more about their story in ksvtw
hello hello!! sorry for the last reply, i got so used to not checking my retrospring i didn't. i def have more maolan fic ideas in my head, so its very likely ill write maolan, but i'm not sure if i'll continue their story from ksvstw. i'm thinking i could maybe write a second small spinoff for them, just to wrap up the end of their arc? but yeah, either way, i'm def going to be writing more of this ship :)
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kim suhwan vs. the world chapter 5!!! oh my god!! the fic is done!! this chapter is about 13k. the whole fic is um. 69k. what the fuck! focus for this chapter is on msi 2024 and a little after.
i cant lie i shed a bit of a tear when i finished this fic. ive never been this emotional about finishing a fic before!! but!! i guess this one is just.. really special to me. i'm not sure. ive been working on this since... april, i guess? its been a while. i really do love all the characters here, especially.. well, suhwan, of course, but jihoon and wangho too. idk.s,dl. wow. wtf am i going to do with my time now that im done this fic!? (write more fics.)
but yeah. anyway, read the fic if you want to, and i hope you enjoy :)
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the
Organization for Transformative Works
kim suhwan vs. the world chapter four is out! about 12k, focus on basically just offseason 2023 and then spring 2024. i have added chapter titles and a playlist to the start of the fic as well!
this chapter i lowkey hate.. but it does contain some of my favorite pieces of dialogue i have ever written! this chapter is super funny in my humble opinion. anyway, read if you want to, and enjoy!
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the
Organization for Transformative Works
kim suhwan vs. the world chapter two is out! 12k ish in total. thank yew to bebe the beta reader for beta reading. summary slash content warning without spoiling uhh... msi 2023. underage drinking. suicide jokes. found family :)
