#knowing*

yk i realize i shoot myself in the foot pretty much every year by not telling people when my birthday is. and it’s just because when i think about reminding people i think it translates as im expecting something and it gives me the worst anxiety. and when people ask for birthdays i just automatically assume they’re not talking about me idk. im also habitually quite uncomfortable with direct attention despite craving it quite often. i’m a walking contradiction and i should try to be better about not feeling guilty about reminding people when i was born on the calendar.

matt is enjoy right now today and im (achilles) new magic wand expect the people dont get that when we’re together/both of us independently as well are where this flower blooms & garden shed & when i see you again

society if ryan ross had his way and all of afycso was an experimental vaudevillian cabaret emo dance pop rock fusion and he was on vocals and also if he had creative control of cricket and clover/pretty.odd. i love u ryan

Me, while being kicked out of heaven, for thirsting for demons: No regrets. Fair tho.

Did I write a 1600 word H. Shields fic that absolutely no one on Earth asked for.? Yes.

sometimes I think abt how I got a 2:1 on a research essay I wrote in 2 days and realise that it’s not even me being dumb it’s the fact that i study law and it’s so much harder to do well in this degree than other humanities degrees. I got a 2:1 easily in a human rights essay and I’m so proud of that but essays that have been solid law essays I’ve tried so hard in and gotten such shit grades it makes me realise I should’ve studied politics or IR instead lol I could’ve done so well :/ I’m probably just gna get a 2:2 now overall lol