#klecsh

As I am now currently working on the reboot of my old Reality Engine with a new name and a new cover, so welcome to Humans Are Weird: RE:ENGINE, and the new cover as well.

this is going to be the precursor to another humans are space fae post i’m going to do in the future and you'll need this post to understand how the second one works enjoy

 The reality engine, also know as gods engine or the endless forge, is a theoretical machine equal to earth in size and more powerful then a quantum computer or the laws of physics themselves. Created by the cannibalizing of every planet in the sol system for the materials they provided, which even included the sun and asteroid belt as well. The earth itself became the hull and frame for the reality engine, causing most of the core and mantel to be discarded while leaving the surface of earth unfazed.

 The reality engine has the ability to generate alternate realities and parallel universes at infinitum, and with this creation the whole of humanity was changed forever. With the engines near omnipotent abilities of materialize realities themselves the threat of diminishing resources became a nothing more then a fading blip in obscurity; hunger no longer existed, human lifespan reached the endless, things once dreamed as mere fiction, along with the things not even thought of, became reality.

 Humans themselves, coupled with the boredom of an immortal lifespan and the need for verity and challenge, began to learn and expand throughout the universe, and through this expanse humanity truly flourished. They learned how to manipulate the universe with their bare hand and without the need of the reality engine the created machines that fed of neutron stars large star ships that created galaxies in their wake; they even created stars ensuring that their universe can never go into heat-death so long as they stayed to create new stars.

But as the human mind wonders so does the humans themselves. Becoming bored with they left leaving their creations so as to star anew in another reality. The tale of humanity and their accomplishments are still studied today even though they have long since left- “ERROR INSUFFICIENT FUNDS TO CONTINUE AUDIO PLEASE INSERT-”

“Cheap piece of crap that was exact amount of credits needed for a full audio.”

“Tarv, hey, its no use getting your tail in a twist their about unveil a human artifact they just found anyways why use info everyone already knows?.”

“It’s because I need to cover for all the facts for our group report, which i seem to be the only one caring about, Klecsh!.”

“Hey I got us passes to this event, which were expensive by the way so don’t complain, now hurry up so we can get good seats near the mist vents cause unlike you Roshians I need my skin moist or it starts to peel just like that field-trip to-”

“I get it! I get it don’t remind me, just let me get my bag and I’ll meat you inside okay.”

“Okay see you inside Tarv.”

“By the precursors I hope this new exhibit will be worth it.”

TO BE CONTINUED   

This is the continuation of the last one enjoy, and since the last one explained what the engine did to humans get ready for some wild sh*t to go down.

you have been warned, have fun and enjoy

After she collected her things Tarv made her way to the auditorium entrance and entered in her access card to the event; she then met up with Klecsh who was in the middle row of the seats.

“Tarv hey!, what took you so long?, the unveiling’s about to start.”

“Sorry, sorry, I couldn’t find you the crowd was too big, lucky for me you have a habit of making noise.”

“Hey!”, the ones sitting behind us shushed as the lights began to dim and as the lights shined on the stage revealing a strange sheet covered object and the surprise guest speaker, “Gasp, that’s Prof. Kellabaris, I can’t believe it.”

“Wait who?”.

“They’re the leading human archaeologist in the known galaxy,” Tarv was genuinely amazed that Klecsh actually did research that was relevant to the assignment, “They've discovered more human artifacts and history then any other archaeologist in the history of history itself.”

“Wow, you actually did some research for once, normally I do all the work while you just play dating sims on the net.”

“Yeah your welcome, now quiet and let the hottie on stage speak,” of course that’s how she was interested in researching them.

“My fellow sapient compatriots of the galaxy, I Prof. Kellabaris, here I stand before you, not as a great explorer, but as a simple scholar”, they spoke with such confidence and charisma that they could easily be mistaken as royalty, “for years of my life I’ve dedicated myself to the discovery of humanitys greatness, even if it means going through their waist bins,” a small amount of the audience chuckles.

“But I digress, ladies, gentlemen, and those of indeterminate gender, I present to you what might be the most significant archaeological I’ve ever uncovered,” they pulled away the sheet revealing revealing a stunning and ethereal white and gilded stone cylinder, four meters tall and etching akin to a computer chip with chunks of large chromatic crystals of bismuth growing randomly from it and its beauty awed the audience to near silence.

“I see you are all speechless, as was I when I first uncovered it on my home planet of Vas’shaka; but its appearance isn't all to take from this piece of precursor ingenuity, for this piece of stone might have, in actuality be a piece of the reality engine itself!”, the auditorium soon became a frenzy of whispers and mutterings as the interest and curiosity of the people grew.

Tarv turned to her friend, only to see Klecsh looking at her with a look of dumbfounded amazement, “You think its true, do you really think this is an actual piece of the reality engine itself?!”, she spoke with more excitement the the day she won a date with her favorite celebrity.

 “I don’t know Klecsh but were definitely gonna pass our assignment to-”, an explosion of pitch-black electricity emerged from the artifact onstage striking the metal scaffolding of the auditorium ceiling which instantly vaporized in the spots the arching black electricity hit. The audience was in a panicked frenzy as they trampled and shoved one another whilst trying to squeeze through the small auditorium doors; the professor themselves where escorted off the stage by staff.

“Tarv, Tarv!, come on we have to get out of here!, lets go!”

“Klecsh it no use!, everyone is in too much of a frenzy got actually leave, just look!”, Tarv pointed at the entrances clogged with people trying to flee, “but there’s an exit backstage we can leave through there!”

“Are you mad, what about lethal artifact that’s blasting lightning everywhere!?”

“As long as were not wearing metal we’ll be fine, now hurry!, if that thing gets anymore unstable it might-”

“Look out!”, Klecsh pushed Tarv down onto the floor, she was about to yell at her until the noticed the her bag completely frozen along with the seat it was laying on.

“What in the-”

“Liquid hydrogen, it leaking from the thing on stage and it’s spraying everywhere!”

“Shit Klecsh this is bad!; the backstage exit is a no-go now and if that thing’s holding liquid hydrogen then it’s pressurized!”

“Meaning!?”

“If the electrical discharge doesn’t kill us, the pressure explosion will and with the amount it leaking best estimates about half a minute before it explodes.”

“What do we do!”

“Take cover!”, Tarv and Klecsh both ducked down behind the seats as the artifact exploded with a deafening blast that shook the entire auditorium causing its ceiling to collapse; after the blast Tarv found her friend lying still next to her, “Klecsh?, Klecsh!”, she placed her hand on Klecshs chest search for a pulse from one of her hearts, “Oh, thank the precursors your just unconscious from over stimulation.”

Tarv look onto the stage where the artifact lay shattered, she began to rise until a arm reached out from within the artifact; in terror she ducked down and looked at it through the cracks between the seats. A strange figure began to rise, although the dust from the blast made it hard to see it clearly she could just about make it out; it was tall covered in a strange robe, its hair reached its shoulders in length. Without warning the creature snapped its gaze to her, its eyes glowing with a unnatural color; she broke line of sight with it and quickly placed her hand over her mouth while clutching her unconscious best friends hand for a semblance of security.

When she ignored her fear and looked again the creature was gone and just as the rescue teams arrived.

To be continued                              

“this is the continuation of the unedited version of part 3 which you can read here: https://ourshyartcollection.tumblr.com/post/174329328519/humans-are-weird-the-reality-engine-part-3

this is the second draft, the other one got deleted by accident, enjoy and thank you for your patience 

“So, I did a little learning while I waited for you two to get here and I’ve gotta say, most of your knowledge about humans is total lie”, after he said that the so called human sat up from the bed; throwing away the empty chip bags and wiping the crumbs off of his clothes, “ sorry I ate all your snacks, it’s a habit when I’m bored.”

“That’s not the issue here right now”, human or not, if his words held true then that would mean then an entire chunk of the galaxies culture would be ruined, “what did you mean when you said “most of your knowledge about humans is a total lie”, I don’t understand.”

“The sentence itself it pretty self explanatory, what you know about humans is mostly wrong”, he then proceeded to pat Tarvs back in what she could only surmise as pity comforting, “at least the parts about the reality engine is all true ,but everything after that is complete crap”, who every he was he was kinda terrible at empathy.

Klecsh was no help with the situation, “Hey, weird human guy, you mind me asking some questions for our essay about human history?”

“Klecsh this is not the right time too be worrying about a stupid assignment!”

“Why?, because an entire chunk of historical stuff is wrong?, that’s a historians problem not mine”, she grabbed the tablet from her bag and sat on the bed and beckoned him to do the same, “okay let me ask you, whats your name and what was it like whe-”

“I’ll stop you right there, the names Hephaestus Rose and since I like your personality I’ll handle the rest for you.”

“What are you talking abou-”, Hephaestus Placed his finger over Klecshs mouth and snapped the fingers of his free hand; suddenly two stacks of papers began to materialize from the air with writing on them identical to both of their individual handwriting. Both Tarv and Klecsh began to look over the papers, as they realized what he did Klecsh couldn’t help but blurt out a response, “you actually did this for us?”

“Mostly for your friend to prove I’m human, but yes, I made the essays for you; complete with both of your personal handwriting and speech patterns”, he stood up and bowed, all the while feigning humility, “and their different enough your teachers will never suspect a thing”, he look towards Klecsh and gave her a seductive wink.

“Oh for fucks sake!”, between the two of them Tarv seemed like the only one to actually care about the situation at hand, and the flirting was also getting on her nerves, “first off, thank you Hephaestus for doing our work, that was enough to convince me, but I’ve got questions and your gonna answer them got it!”

“Whoa there sister, can you at least be a little nicer abou-”, Tarv glare at him intensely, mostly because she was done with all the crazy shit that happened today, “okay, I’ll shut up now.”

“And Klecsh, I’m your best friend, but your completely not helping the situation right now.”

“Yeah thats fair”, Klecsh started to glow a bright bio luminescent blue and orange, which for her species is equivalent to blushing.

“Whoa you glow!?, That’s like the coolest and cutest think ever”, Tarv noticed that her glow soon turned from blue and orange, to bright pink and red, “color changing can you be anymore awesome”, those two were getting off topic again so Tarv changed the subject.

“Ahem!, dude anymore complements and Klecsh is gonna faint; besides your suppose to answer my questions not flirt with my best friend.”

“Sorry, okay so what do you wanna know first?”, Tarv was finally about to get some answers.

“How about we start with why you were in that thing that almost killed everyone at the museum.”

 finally done enjoy 

Part 6 of the series marks the end of Vol 1. Vol 2 is under writing and will be starting in October and will consist of five parts.

Don’t worry though plenty more stories will be arriving in its hiatus. 

The continuation of the saga, this is the chapter that focuses mostly on the lore and what happened after the reality engine was created.

I hope you enjoy this and thank you for your support, it’s what keeps me writing. For any questions you have for me just leave me an ask.

 “Fine I’ll tell you everything I know, later.”

“Wait, what!?”, Tarv couldn’t believe it, first Hephaestus said that he would tell her everything and now, “what do you mean by “later”, I thought came to an understanding about this?”

“No offence but Klecsh looks like she’s about to pass out from exhaustion”, she turned her attention towards her friend to find asleep and drooling on her bed, “besides, your both covered in rubble dust and, what I’m assuming is, sweat.”

Tarv smelled her clothes and noticed there unappealing stench, “wow, okay you have a point, I’m gonna wake Klecsh and were both gonna take a shower so would you kindly leave  so we can change.”

“No need”, he clapped his and in an instant the filth on both Tarv and Klecsh was replaced and both her and Klecsh looked as if they’ve just taken a shower; they both also smelled of something sweat but Tarv couldn’t put her claw on what it was until Hephaestus explained, “no need to shower when I can do it in an instant, I also added the smell of my favorite strawberry shampoo and conditioner.”

“Uh..., thanks but, whats a strawberry?”

“It’s a fruit from Earth, before I was-”, he paused stopping himself from finishing the sentence, “well, it doesn’t matter right now; hey want me to do the pajamas?”

He prepared to snap his fingers but Tarv, “I appreciate the offer but I can change on my own I just need you to look away.”

“I know, it’s just that, if you wanna have a good sleep do it like a human”, he pulled a long strip of measuring tape from his sleeve and began to wrap it around Tarv, “I would have to change it up to fit your tail, arms and, legs.”

“I mean what are they even made of, how are they even that shade of purple”, Hephaestus then began tapping and moving Tarvs arm on every point of articulation she had,  right down to the fingers of her hand, “and why can they be hard as bone and soft enough to have no joint gaps?”

“They’re made of cells that increase density in response to kinetic force”, although the conversation was interesting, it was leaning far off track, “hey aren’t we getting a little off topic here?”

“So your arms and legs are made of non-Newtonian fluid, fascinating”, Tarv started to become irritated that he wasn’t paying attention until she found out why, “and I know were getting off topic, I just wanted to distract you long enough to do the pajama thing.”

“What!, how did you-”, Tarv was amazed to find that her clothes were changed from the dirty ones she had to soft and free flowing clothes, “I thought you had to snap your fingers to do something like this.” 

“I only do that for fun”, he then changed his own clothes into, what appeared to be, a single piece hoodie depicting an unknown orange and white animal, “so, how do you like my fox pajamas?”

“Its cute, but did you make some for Klecsh?”

“Just look”, Tarv turned towards her friend and immediately blushed white the instant she saw what Klecsh was wearing; a seductive sleeveless black gown over layered with and open robe, pitch black but faded to transparency when it reached the ends of the sleeves and the bottom, “by the precursors why did you make hers so risque!?”

“You blush white?, that really contrasts you dark magenta skin.”

Out of embarrassment she turned away and covered her face, “just answer the damn question.”

“Because, I thought it looked cute.”

“Provocative seems like a better word for it.”

“Oh deal with it, besides you should get some sleep don’t you have class tomorrow.”

“How do you know that?”

“I ready your academy class schedule.”

“But how that was in my ba-”, she paused when she saw that Hephaestus was holding her bag, he then proceeded to toss it to her, “my bag!, I thought this was frozen solid at the museum.”

“It was, but now it’s not”, even if he is a weird human he did have the best intentions, “beside it’s only natural to help a fellow schoolmate.”

“Yeah I guess tha-, wait what?”

“Yup, I need to know more of whats been going on during the humans absence, so starting tomorrow I’ll be going to the academy with you”, this has turned into the worst situation possible.

I finally finished yes