Happy pride month! We all deserve something a little soft, don’t we? So, here is just a cute little fic about coming out with baked goods!
Summary: Fitz knows who he is, and he doesn’t exactly hide it, but there are a few people he hasn’t told, and don’t they deserve to know, too?
Warnings: brief depiction of anxiety
Words: 2,534
Leo centric, coming out
Sneak Peek:
It was Agnes who came in from the backyard, sliding the door closed again behind her before stepping over to the island to inspect his set up. The no baking rule didn't really apply to him, but he still stood up straighter, bracing himself for whatever questions and concerns she had.
"Someone's been busy. It smells... good, actually. I assume the Radcliffe lack of baking skills is not something you inherited?"
With a small shake of his head and a smile, Fitz moved to grab two mugs for tea from the cabinet behind him. "No, it's not. I actually know what I'm doing, for the most part, and I promise I won't set anything on fire."
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Can we take a moment to appreciate how beautiful our ships´ names are? I mean: Fitzsimmons, Philinda, Mackelena, Huntingbird, Sousy/TimeQuake, StaticQuake... even less important or temporary pairings like Maydrew and Kitscliffe, or non-canons like Skimmons/BioQuake, QuakeRider, FitzMack, Scis & Spies, Simmorse, FitzSkimmons, Pipsy, Mayo, FitzHunter, Tripsimmons, QuakeShot, MorseCode... I could go on and on honestly, but you get the point. I love our ships´ names.
Holden watched as Agnes tried to hide the tears welling up in her eyes, hide her unease at his assistant, AIDA, looking just like her.
"Just one last step." AIDAs chirpy but monotone voice said as she typed into a computer, her robotic smile plastered on her face. "You're doing well." Agnes sucked in a shaking breath and nodded before looked to Holden.
Holden rubbed her arm, drinking in every part of her that he could see. "See? Painless." His smile was pained, his tears barely restrained. "Just as I promised." Wrong. He promised he would save her; this something different. "The worst is over." No, it was still to come. "No one should have to go through what you have. Soon, you'll never suffer again." He finally told her the truth, but it felt empty, disappointing.
Agnes nodded and laughed wetly, gripping his hand in a vice.
As AIDA fastened the head gear, Holden took another moment to study his love.
Her cardigan was somewhere between red and orange, her white blouse sprinkled with tiny blue, green, and red flowers. The silver and white ring hanging from her neck sparkles in the light of the submarine, as did her blue earrings.
Holden stepped in front of her. "Are you ready for a better world?" A world where we will never be plagued by this grief? A world where the mistakes I made would never have happened? A world where I didn't leave you--a world where I never had a reason to leave you? The secondary questions went unspoken, but she could hear them. Are you ready for a world where our love will never be on a timer?
Agnes nodded, her chest heaving. Holden stared into her eyes, her beautiful eyes, a sparkling brown that should never be shining with tears the way they were in that moment. Her eyes were so magnificent--they were the first things he had ever truly seen, the only thing he ever wanted to look at. Her eyes were the beginning and end of the universe, the very definition of beauty, the gateway to heaven.
Her head fell back, and here eyes closed. And with them, it seemed all the stars in the universe vanished. Holden let himself look away, let his lip quiver.
My beloved Agnes, he thought, I will be with you again soon. I will never leave you again.
And he didn't. Holden stayed by Agnes' side for hours, holding the delicate hands he never wanted to let go of. His world already felt so dull, so bland, even though she was right next to him. Agnes was dying, and the universe knew it.
Holden didn't know what Agnes was doing in her new life, but he hoped she was happy. Maybe she was decorating their house, or reading her favorite, or wandering through a museum filled with all her favorite pieces. Whatever she was doing, wherever she was, Holden hoped she was waiting for him.
"There is nothing we can do to sustain her in this life."Â AIDA spoke above the beeping of the heart monitor, too few and too far between.
Holden swallowed the lump in his throat and slowly, gently, brought Agnes' hand up to his lips. He pressed a kiss to the back of her hand, eyes shut against the cruel world that would take his beloved away from him.
The deafening flatline was a death sentence, Holdens personal damnation to Hell.
He choked in a breath. "It doesn't matter." He held her hand tighter, squeezed his eyes tighter. He couldn't bear to see the world without color, a dull world that would prove she would never truly feel anything ever again. "In the Framework, her consciousness will live forever."
Holden forced his eyes open.
A sob tore through his throat.
Her cardigan was grey, her blouse was white, speckled with different shades of grey in the shapes of flowers. Her skin had lost all warmth, her hair was the color of a storm cloud. He was glad he couldn't see the eyes he adored, for he didn't know what he would do if he had to see the things that gave him a purpose extinguished.
He had fulfilled his purpose, hadn't he?
Success never felt so heart wrenching.
He wanted to see her--needed, beyond food, drink, sleep, sanity, to see Agnes. More than anything, Holden wanted to cram his head into the sensors and enter the only place in the universe he could find happiness anymore. But he couldn't.
He feared what he would see. Would he see Agnes, the love of his life, in all her glorious beauty? Would he see her soft brown hair? Would he be able to count the specks of gold in her eyes?
Just hearing her voice would be enough, but Holden was a terrible, greedy man. He wanted everything to be perfect. He wanted to see her. He wanted to feel the giddy happiness he had felt the moment he had laid his eyes on her, he wanted to feel the stars align, he wanted to feel lighter than air, a high that no drug could supply. He wanted to see color.
Agnes would see color. He made sure of it. He would not make a world where she couldn't indulge in the simple joy of looking at art.
After hours of treacherous stalling, Holden bit the bullet.
He didn't look AIDA in the eyes as she hooked him up to the Framework. She wasn't his Agnes, but they had the same eyes. Holden couldn't look into her eyes without feeling like he failed.
The grey world around him faded to black, and Holden had never felt such a mix of fear and excitement in his life.
- - -
His eyes opened in lazy blinks, his hand twitched from sleep, and he felt a deep, peaceful calm that he hadn't in years.
It took him a second to register the pale green walls, or the yellow sunlight filtering through an open window. Holden sat up with a soft gasp. It worked.
"Agnes?"Â His voice sounded desperate, yet hopeful.
"Yes, Holden?" Her accented voice held a smile, content at happy. She was just beyond a wall.
Holden rushed through an open door and stopped.
Agnes Kitsworth smiled at him from her breakfast nook overlooking whatever city they were in. He felt his insides burning with the pure, transcendent joy at seeing her, really seeing her, like the first time in his life.
Holden slowly approached and sat in the nook to face her. He reached out and cupped her face in his hand.
Agnes leaned into his touch with a soft smile. "Everything alright, Holden?"
He smiled. It had been so long since he had smiled like this. "Everything is perfect."
The flowers on her dress were purple, red, and yellow, the sky outside was bluer than any ocean or lake could ever hope to be. And her eyes--oh, her eyes! They shimmered in the afternoon sun, brighter than any light, warmer than any sun, the universe dimmed in comparison.
Holdens hand drifted from her face to her back. He pulled her in and hugged her, felt her hair against his face, softer than silk. "Everything is perfect." He repeated when her arms wrapped around him in return.
He felt Agnes smile, and he pressed his face into her neck.
"Everything is perfect."
Everything is perfect, in a world where we will never run out of time.
Once someone posted and idea about Agnes being pregnant when she died in the Framework and I will never be able to stop thinking about that. So here’s a crappy AU. Because tears.Â
“Lavender? Plum? Violet? They’re all purple!” + kitscliffe
Radcliffe considers himself to be a very smart person. Genius, in fact. He figures that there’s no place for modesty when it’s only false. He’s smart enough to understand and begin to map the inner workings of the brain; to understand genetics, the human body and how to replicate both.
And yet.
“Agnes.” Saying her name is unnecessary, they’re the only ones in the aisle but he likes the moment when she looks at him, likes the feel of the letters on his tongue. “Don’t you think this is a little overkill? All these different tubes of purple when-”
Agnes is beside him, coming to his side the way he knew she would. The way he hoped she would.
“They aren’t all purple,” Agnes corrects, reaching out to brush her fingers against the tubes of acrylic paint with a fondness that makes Holden smile. “There’s a royal purple and then violet and also lavender-”
Radcliffe picks up one of the paint colors. “Plum?” He raises an eyebrow. “Lavender? Plum? Violet? They’re all purple!”
When Agnes starts explaining the differences, the varying richness in the hues, the soft ways that the colors can suggest different times of day or convey different elements, Radcliffe has to hide a smile. He pretends to study the paints but it’s difficult to look anywhere other than her face, to do anything but listen to her voice, melodious and impassioned as she tells him all these things that she’s deemed so important.
Radcliffe considers himself to be a smart person. Smart enough to figure out exactly how to spend the next fifteen minutes listening to the beautiful voice of a beautiful woman.
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Kitscliffe and “Stay there. I’m coming to get you.” (I was really trying to find one you couldn't make sad but I definitely failed)
They’re taking a break, a temporary thing, because Agnes is dying and having a man that looks at her with pity rather than love is something that she can’t handle.Â
Ever since the hospital, ever since the doctors said a year if she’s lucky, he’s been looking at her like that. Like he’s been counting the minutes.
Each one ticking by and -
So when a friend from college mentioned being in the city and wanting to grab drinks she had took the opportunity. It was supposed to make her feel better, to make her feel young and free again, and to forget about everything.
But somehow, the opposite effect had happened.
Two drinks into the night she’d blurted out that she had a brain tumor to some random guy at the bar and it wasn’t - she couldn’t do this.
She couldn’t be here, pretending everything was okay when her heart hurt.Â
She steps out of the bar into the cool night air and means to call a taxi, one to take her back to the hotel her friends were staying at but, instead she finds herself moving on auto pilot punching in the one number she had been avoiding the past few days.
He answers after the first ring, sounding tired and a bit sad but still there - “Agnes?”
“I miss you,” she says, because that’s the first thing she thinks of - Â
“I don’t want to die,” she says, because she doesn’t and she scare and -Â
“I thought this would be easier,” she says, because he’s not here and -Â
The thing about the world is that there’s so much that people don’t know, especially when those things are being purposefully hidden from them. One of those things, happens to be magic.
Of course, magic can’t be hidden from everyone, and there are two factions who know about it - the Users and the Hunters. The Users are the ones who wield magic, who can control the wild energies inside themselves and make beautiful things. The Hunters want that to stop. They want to end the line of magic completely and make the world safe again. There’s significantly less danger if certain people can’t use magic for dark purposes.
The Radcliffes are a family of Users. The magic within them has been past down through generations, growing stronger with time. So, when magical prodigy Holden met Agnes, another User with magic even more wild than his own, they got on like fire and gasoline. As the years passed, and their love and power grew, Hunters started to take notice.
Outrunning Hunters isn’t hard, not when they’d both been doing it since they were teenagers, and it’s made even easier when they have someone to run with. It’s when they had a baby, and then a growing child into the mix that it really gets difficult. Because then it’s not only their lives on the line, but Leo’s, too.
Years continued to pass, and the Radcliffe family was able to settle down again. For a while, their lives were as normal as they could be with the magic running through their veins, with normal jobs and normal school and people around them didn’t suspect a thing. But their normal life couldn’t last forever, and all at once, that perfect fantasy they’d let themselves fall into shattered - Leo’s magic was growing too fast, bringing Hunters to the area and disturbing the quiet town around them.
And, really, between the magical prodigy living right under the noses of the innocent and the armies that were gathering to find him to prevent an ancient prophesy from coming true, magic couldn’t stay a secret forever.