#kit tip

1. TRIM YOUR BERET

Your beret will have a lining on the inside - usually silk or cotton. Trim this off, as close to the leather band as possible.

2. SOAK YOUR BERET

Turn on the taps and get a sinkful of hot water. Soak your beret thoroughly.

If it’s a soldier pattern (wide crown - hangs down over your ear when you put it on and smear it down your head), you’ll want to soak in alternating hot, then cold, then hot, to shrink the crown. If it’s officer pattern (narrow crown), just soak it in warm water.

3. SHAVE YOUR BERET

No, this isn’t a wind-up!

Using a cheap disposable shaving razor (have several to hand - you’ll wreck the blades!), gently shave all the wool fluff off your beret. At the start it should look fluffy and felty like this:

But by the end it will be smooth and flat, like this:

Wash/wipe the excess wool off until it’s fluff-free. Do a final soak and wring it; ideally the final soak should be in warm water, because you’re about to…

4. PUT IT ON YOUR HEAD

…and that’s unpleasant with cold wet wool. Don the beret. It should be relatively high at the back, and low at the front, with the band just above your eyebrows. 

This is a lot lower than most people normally wear hats, and will feel unnatural. Cope! Don’t let it slip up your forehead!

5. SMEAR IT

You want to start smearing the wet wool backwards and to the right. The place where the cap badge will go (most berets have a leather patch on the inside, and stitching on the outside, to help you locate this) should be above the outside of your left eyebrow. Smear everything so that it falls over the right side of your head, towards your ear, and all excess material is guided towards the back.

You can sew the cap badge on at this point if you like. Don’t sew the cap badge on before you’ve shaved it!

You’re aiming for this look:

The crease where the material folds at the front should be sharp and end just before the cap badge. You want as little air gap between the fold and the leather band/your head as possible. Smear it until it’s as tight as possible, then…

6. Tie it in place

Use a necktie or something else wide and flat, tie it in place, tying OVER the fold which overhangs your right ear. The aim is to get it to stay as shaped as possible for as long as possible.

7. Patience, Young Padawan

Leave it on for as long as you can bear it. It will take a few hours to dry, so you won’t be able to keep it on until it’s totally dry; when you must finally take it off, leave the tie in place and drape it gently over a radiator or in an airing cupboard, being careful not to lose the shape. The wool should dry in shape and when you put it on tomorrow, naturally stay in new, molded shape!

8. Wash, Rinse, Repeat

Some berets may take several moldings to get the correct shape. If you’re consistently struggling to keep a good shape, check the beret size - if your crown is too small, and you’re wearing it too low on the back of your head, it will consistently “puff” and stick out to the size; try a larger band size.

Godspeed and good luck!

Essentials: I carry these because I end up using them on a regular basis, at many LARP events.

Antiseptic wipes

Low adherent dressings

Zinc tape

Tick tweezers or needlenose tweezers

Ibuprofen and/or paracetamol

Emergency tampon/pad (yes you should damn well carry one even if you don’t menstruate)

Nice-to-haves: I carry these because they might make my event more comfortable or solve an unusual problem, but they’re not necessary in the average first aid kit.

Dry antiseptic spray

Self adhesive dressings

Duct tape

Fabric bandage

Cocodamol

Safety pins

Blister plasters (Compeed, Moleskine)

Antihistamine cream / hydrocortisone

Going overboard: I carry these because one day they might come in handy, but they’re by no means necessary.

Celox

Steri-strips

Dioralyte sachets (oral rehydration)

Latex / surgical gloves

Single dose canesten / off-brand anti-thrush tablet

Added extras: I don’t carry these things in my first aid kit, but some people do:

Paracetamol-based painkillers

Instant ice pack

Eye wash / eye drops

Scissors

Antiseptic / skin healing cream

Surgical tape / micropore tape

Deep heat / other muscle rub gel

Alcohol gel

CLEAN: Wet and dry antiseptics. Use wet when there is dirt or gunk that needs cleaning from around a wound - use dry when you don’t want to attract more dust into the wound, or for wet seeping grazes you don’t want to soak any further. Use both (wet then dry) when getting and staying clean is important - like after removing a tick.

BANDAGE: Various types of dressing. Low adherent dressings are good for minor burns and weeping grazes. Steri-strips are good for bigger wound closures that don’t quite require stitches. You are highly unlikely to ever encounter a situation at LARP that requires the use of Celox.

FEET: Moleskin, compeed and zinc tape. Zinc tape prevents blisters - compeed and moleskin relieve them. Zinc tape also makes a good adhesive to hold on dressings, and an excellent athletic support (e.g. taping up weak ankles) if you know how to use it.

PAIN: Brufen and co-codamol. Never take drugs you’re not used to at a LARP event. Watch out for other people’s allergies.

MISC: I always carry duct tape in my first aid kit because of how much I sweat - if I get a hand injury, I will sweat the dressing off in minutes if I’m working! Duct tape on skin isn’t comfortable; don’t use it on other people without trying it on yourself first. The tick tweezers I use are basically needle-nose tweezers, so I can use them to remove splinters too.

Other LARP packing lists here and here - consult these too.

Washkit incl. teeth, shower gel/shampoo, eyes, baby wipes, meds

First aid kit incl. blister kit, antiseptic, zinc tape for sprains, Brufen

3x pairs pants (for two day event - “pants” = “nights away” +1)

Americans - I’m talking about underwear.

4x pairs socks (as above)

Spare bra

Sleeping system incl. sleeping bag, mat/campbed, liner

Warm kit e.g. down jacket / wool tunic

Boots

Wound kit incl. bruise wheel, Collodion, freshscratch

Fakeblood

Mirror

Superglue

Booze or nonalcoholic drink

Emergency snacks

Opinel or other little OC knife/folding scissors to carry IC

Jute sack

Rope

IC water bottle

Pencil(s)

IC paper

Spare belt(s)

Leatherman

Flashlight

Clean OC t-shirt

Cable ties

Sunscreen

Jetboil or other emergency cooking system

1. Two Out Of Three

If you have a typically female body, and are buying off-the-shelf LARP armour, I reckon you can expect to get two out of three of this tripod:

Comfort

Practicality/durability

Appearance

If you have a less typical body in size or shape, you may only get one of these in any given set of armour, particularly around the torso. While it’s better now than it was five years ago (and will be better again in five more!), in the meantime you should think carefully about your priorities. 

Going to be wearing the armour for 6 hour sweaty battles through the mud? It wants to be comfortable. 

Trying to impress your fellow Knights at tourney? It’s all about the look.

Taking it on and off a lot, playing a system where “realistic” armour is important for survival, and want to keep it for years? Practicality/durability is where it’s at.

This lady’s gorgeous custom scale armour is very likely close to achieving all three - but it’s heavy on the time and money investment. Photo by Tom Garnett, from Empire LARP.

2. These Hips Don’t Lie

Most typical female bodies have hips which are substantially wider than their waists. Most historical armour was designed for people with typically male bodies, which tend to have hips and waists which are closer to the same width. 

As a result, you’ll often find that armour - particularly plate armour - bangs on your hips, leaving bruises on your hip-bones. Worse, if you have wide hips and a short torso, you can find breastplates and backplates forced upwards, jarring against your chin or neck. 

There are three ways I’ve fixed this in the past:

Short breastplates / plackarts - plackarts, like the one pictured below, can really be a female body’s best friend. They are short and light enough to sit comfortably above your hips, often very adjustable (the short height means they’re easy to bend into shape) and leave your breast area free for however you want to armour that. Alternatively, getting your armourer to make you a shorter breastplate, or cutting a few inches off an existing one (much cheaper than a custom build! I got my £60 breastplate cut down for £5 and a packet of crisps), can ensure that your hips are left free.

Chainmail or flexible armour - Scale, chainmail, brigandine, lorica segmentata and other forms of flexible or semi-flexible armour (including many leather armours) tend to avoid this problem by flexing around your hips instead of trying to ride roughshod over them.  You’ll still get some tightness, particularly from brigs and lorica, but I find it more bearable. Metal lamellar doesn’t tend to have the same effect, because it goes straight up and down and doesn’t bend outwards very happily.

Custom armour - if you’re going to an armourer to get something made, make sure they’ve made kit for clients with hips before and if you can, speak to a client with your body shape. Many male armourers don’t appreciate the “hips” issue and while they’ll leave plenty of room for your breasts, they’ll cut the breastplate straight or (worse) tucked in low at the waist - recipe for disaster.

Photographer unknown, from White City LARP.

3. Go Generic

As with any piece of LARP kit, if you’re buying your first piece of LARP armour, I recommend going as generic as possible. Get something you can reuse in multiple systems and won’t regret owning if your current character dies tomorrow. 

For my money, the best “generic buy” for someone with tits and hips is a short-sleeved butted chainmail shirt or vest, which should set you back about £60-£100; I’ve used mine in everything from sci-fi to medieval fantasy to Renaissance city-states. You can ornament armour with paint, ribbons, flowers, furs, a Sharpie… but the more generic your base, the happier future-you will be.

If you are struggling to find chainmail that fits you, another good option is a leather cuirass or jerkin. Softer leathers will be more permissive to your shape, and there are more armourers who make leather kit specifically designed for people with breasts and bigger hips.

4. Huge Tracts of Land

The first thing most people think of when they consider female bodies in armour, particularly plate armour, is to panic about the breasts. But where will the BREASTS go?!

The truth is that I have never worn a rigid breastplate (or… any other torso armour, actually, except maybe my lorica, which is pretty snug) where I noticed any interference with my breasts. I’m a C cup. I expect that most people with C and smaller cup sizes would experience the same. As an example, look at this picture of Jean Seberg playing Joan of Arc:

She’s clearly wearing a flat breastplate, and the way it’s sitting quite naturally and tucking well to her waist (note the high waist and flare to flexible lames, which will be very comfy for her hips!) suggests she must have some pretty small tits under that, no? Actually, no:

OK, there’s clearly some Wonderbra assistance in this photo, but my point is that she’s by no means flat-chested.

Bodies with larger breasts, especially at E cup and above, may find rigid breastplates which fit their shoulders are uncomfortably tight on their chests. A sports bra can help with this effect, or at the extreme end, a binder. There are some rigid breastplates, like those in the Gothic style, which leave a lot of room in the chest between metal and flesh; that room is ripe to be filled with breast tissue. 

By contrast, if you have larger breasts (E+) and don’t like them squashed, avoid off-the-shelf versions of armours like muscle plate, lamellar and Wisby plate. Also avoid tight brigandines - while the “tail” may flex around your hips, it is heavy and the chest won’t flex so well around breast tissue. They’re not good armours to pick unless they’ve been specifically tailored to you - they sit flat and close to the chest, and will crush you mercilessly.

If you’re a trans* bloke, you’re crossplaying or you otherwise want to appear flat chested, plate armour, lorica, muscle plate and similar can be a great way to integrate the visual equivalent of a binder into your costume.

YES YES FINALLY I HAVE AN EXCUSE TO POST THIS PHOTO YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW UNCONTROLLABLY EXCITED IT MAKES ME. HOW FUCKING AMAZING DOES SHE LOOK WITH THIS BEARD. I JUST. BRING ME THAT BEARD I WISH TO WEAR IT AND/OR SEDUCE IT. UNF. Female LARPer with breasts, playing male character, in beard and muscle plate. Photo by Oliver Facey, from Empire LARP.

This trans male LARPer is taking advantage of the excellent flattening effect provided by lorica - in this case, leather lorica - and DAMN he’s looking badass while doing it. Photo by Charlotte Moss, from Odyssey LARP.

Those with very large breasts may sometimes find chainmail uncomfortable to wear. Although chainmail sized for breastless chests (which is all off-the-shelf stuff that hasn’t had darts specially added!) will naturally flatten your breasts a bit, some people at F cup and above report that the mail “hangs” downwards after the widest point of the chest, which can be uncomfortable. 

You should always try to belt your chainmail if you can (see “weight bearing”, below), and if you suffer from this, try a wider/hero belt worn as high up the waist as possible. It will help alleviate the “hanging” effect and reduce weight on delicate tissues.

5. Weight Bearing

You should check out this post if your armour’s going to weigh more than you usually walk around wearing, and particularly pay attention to the point about where weight is best distributed. In brief, if you have narrow shoulders and broad hips, try loading downwards towards the hips and keep as much weight off your shoulders as you can.

That aside, it is worth mentioning that the average female body can carry less weight than the average male body. Most female-bodied LARPers I know can jaunt about in armour for a few hours with no ill effect. However, if you have narrower shoulders, lower lung capacity and less muscle mass than your male-bodied friends, don’t expect to be carrying the same weight as them for the same duration right out the door and feel as comfortable afterwards. And for Gods’ sakes don’t hurt yourself by loading on heavy plate in the name of “keeping up with the guys”.

Typical female bodies are more vulnerable to stress fractures than typical male bodies, particularly under weight. I’ve not come across this as a problem much in the LARPing community, but it’s a huge issue in military training. If you’re going to be carrying heavy weight (20%+ of your bodyweight) for upwards of 4 hours a week, regularly, follow these guidelines to avoid injury:

Eat and hydrate well.

Avoid painkillers. If you’re in enough pain that you need to take a painkiller before you carry weight, don’t carry the weight.

Listen to your body. If you get lower limb, shoulder, back or hip pain, take the weight off, stop exercise and see a doctor if it persists.

Lots of calcium. Extreme exercise can deplete calcium over time, especially in people without typical-male levels of testosterone, which increases your vulnerability to stress fractures.

Lots of iron. Female bodies are more susceptible to anaemia than male bodies, and low iron won’t help your strength and fitness one bit. Steak, broccoli, Guiness and supplements.

Lots of sleep. You should aim to sleep at least 8 hours the night before strenuous weight-bearing exercise, and another 8 the night after to recover.

Good footwear. If you have never had boots properly fitted or had gait analysis, consider it; excess heel striking or pronation can cause shin splints or hip misalignment under weight, for example. Female bodies’ joints tend to be more flexible, which can be a risk factor for some injuries. 

Reduce leg weight. Weight on your legs (e.g. heavy steel greaves) is disproportionately difficult to keep moving over time compared to weight higher up the trunk. If you can swap out your greaves for lighter ones, or move the armour coverage up to your thighs or arms, you’ll increase your endurance under load.

6. Boob Plate

OK! Let’s switch fire away from female bodies, and talk about cultural attitudes to armour and gender for a minute.

This is the bit where I’m meant to say that “boob plate” and chainmail bras are the great Satan, and they’re the cancer that’s destroying women’s armour, and all the rest. And yeah, sure, I find those things pretty distasteful. I think overdone boob plate sometimes looks dumb and chainmail bras key into a legacy of exploitation and objectification of women, and I wouldn’t wear one to LARP in. But ultimately your costume choice is your choice, and first it has to be about character and setting. 

Lots of people dislike armour which has curves to follow the line of the breasts because it “isn’t historically accurate” or “doesn’t make sense from a protection point of view”. The first of those is irrelevant to us - we’re LARPers. The second is kinda relevant and kinda not - if you’re playing in a setting which might include, for example, Roman or Greek style muscle plate, that stuff isn’t molded like that because it turns blades. Its purpose is aesthetic and psychological, to accentuate the desired physicality of the wearer. 

If he can have his desired physicality accentuated, while getting good LARP armour coverage, why can’t a woman (or anyone else whose desired physicality includes breasts) have theirs accentuated? And damn right this applies whether or not they have tits under there.

Are chainmail bikinis exploitative? No. You wanna wear that, you go right ahead. Are fictional settings which put their men in practical plate armour and their women in skimpy breast-enhancing outfits, and pretend both have the same protection from damage, exploitative and sexist? Yes. Sure they are. Avoid.

Ultimately, is it possible to wear flat-chested armour which doesn’t emphasise your assets, and still be badass and sexy and feminine?

Fuck yeah.

And is it possible to wear armour that shows a curve in the breast line, and still be totally practical and ready to rock in a swordfight?

YES.

WE.

CAN.

(Both photos by Tom Garnett, from Odyssey LARP.)

Where do you get PAX?

You have to make it yourself, but the constituent parts are easy to get hold of.

The best place to get prosaid in the UK is www.henna-boy.co.uk, who charge very reasonable prices, although you can do pretty well on ebay. Anyone charging more than a tenner for 50ml is ripping you off, and you will probably be able to pay less than that.

Craft/budget grade acrylic paint is perfectly fine and available at most art shops. I tend to get "student artist" paints just because there is more guarantee of colour consistency from batch to batch and they dry up a bit slower.

Stick an equal mix of both these things in a pot and stir it up until there's no streaks in the colour. if making white PAX, stir it a bit more, because you won't be able to tell when it's fully mixed. I find as long as the lid's decently tight, the mixed up colour will last for a couple of years or more.

LARPHacks note: I’m still using a bottle of PAX my friend mixed for me in 2007. It’s going strong.

How do you put it on yourself?

I tend to get the cheapest bathroom sponge I can find that doesn't have massive irregular holes in, and cut bits off it. You won't get to use the sponge more than once so cheap is good here. Dab it gently on- don't rub with the sponge, or it will look manky. You can do several thin coats so don't get too overenthusiastic on the first go.

Blue PAX, with “fishscale” sequins pressed in while it’s still drying. Photo by Tom Garnett, from Empire LARP.

...Scales?

PAX is excellent for scales. The magic ingredient is fishnet tights. Dab on a layer of base colour as before, and then stretch a piece of fishnet tights over the area on which you want scales, and carefully dab on a small amount of paint of a different colour through the fishnets. Putting the tights in an embroidery hoop (available for a couple of quid from most sewing/craft stores, or the internet) makes it a lot easier to do this without a helper.

Stopping it coming off again

PAX will be a bit sticky unless set with some kind of powder. Translucent makeup setting powder is ideal, but plain old talcum powder will do if you're on a budget or working on short notice. On most skin it'll last like this for four or five days. Powdering once a day is ideal but not essential.

The brown “bark” is PAX blended into a latex prosthetic; the green is eyeshadow. Photo by Tom Garnett, from Empire LARP.

Making it come off when you want it to

Proprietary prosaide removers are available. I'm told isopropyl alcohol works, but I haven't personally tried either of these things because after four days I can remove it by scrubbing with hot soapy water and a flannel. The more acrylic paint in the mix, the easier it will be to remove, but the easier it'll come off before you want it to as well.

Limitations?

PAX in many cases is the Wonder Paint that is the answer to all your hatred of having to put on a complex makeup job anew every morning. But it does have some limitations that you may want to be aware of. I don't recommend scales without a base colour, or any pattern involving thin lines or small areas, because PAX does come off a little at the edges of each individual painted bit, so you'll lose a lot of definition.

You're also likely to find a certain amount of paint flaking off from areas that come under constant abrasion- under bra straps or circlets, say. I have colour-matched my PAX for Eleri to two colours of Diamond FX paint so I can use PAX on my face and conventional paint across my collarbones and neck. Others' mileages may vary.

PAX colour-matched to an elasticated half-mask. Photo by Oliver Facey, from Pioneers LARP.

LARPHacks Notes:

1. Slap Me Some Skin

One use that Pufferfish doesn’t mention is “blanking” tattoos and other marks you don’t want your character to have. Mix up a bottle of PAX to match your skin tone, and apply a layer or two over the tat - voila - tat hidden! I have a Latin tat which isn’t suitable for all settings, and I just draw a line over it in PAX and call it a scar when it’ll be on show.

The surface that skin tone PAX leaves isn’t precisely like real skin; it’s more like a scar, very flat and matte in visual texture. For this reason, it can also be great for creating old scars.

I’ve never tried it myself, but some people recommend mixing liquid foundation in with Pros-Aide to make a good skin tone - it sounds like an expensive experiment to me.

PAX makeup blended with forehead prosthetic. Photo by model, from Empire LARP.

2. Safety

Some people (including this article and others) have expressed concerns about using acrylic paint in makeup. Some acrylic paints (particularly expensive ones) do contain toxic substances; I understand this can be more of a problem in America than the UK. 

If you are concerned, artist quality acrylics should always list their pigments on the tubes, and you can cross-reference those pigments with a list of toxic ones (start here or engage in a bit of Googling for toxicity info). 

Most toxic pigments these days are only used in super high quality paints; “student artist” ones will use safer (cheaper) imitations. 

American laws in some states can be super-paranoid about toxicity. I own makeup with the warning "do not put near eyes and mouth in the state of California".... ;)

Ultimately, don’t do anything you don’t feel safe doing; read the label; and do your research.