#kingtrevor

Pulling a rickety old chair in front of the window, you shivered as you wrapped your arms around you to try and get a bit warmer. You weren’t sure if your leg was shaking because of the cold or if was due to you worrying that three of your camp mates could be lost in the blizzard that was raging outside.

In the aftermath of escaping Blackwater, you had had no time time to think, and even as you helped Miss Grimshaw & Pearson set the new camp up in this abandoned mining time, you hadn’t realised that John hadn’t returned from his scouting trip that Dutch had sent him on two days previously. It was only when you’d finally chance to sit down earlier that morning that you overheard Abigail mentioning that John was yet to return. You’d brushed the thought off until Arthur had returned from his own scouting mission and you heard Abigail plead with him to go that you started to worry for his safety.

Listening to the conversation, Arthur very nearly refused to go, what with there still being bad blood between the two of them, but before you had chance to volunteer Hosea had managed to persuade him & Javier to go take a look and see what they could find. That was almost 6 hours ago and the night was beginning to draw in.

Reaching in your pocket you pulled out a cigarette & lit it in the hope it would provide some kind heat, or at the very least, help steady your nerves. After taking a long drag from it, something outside caught your attention. Against the sea of white, you could make out two dark spots that seem to be slowly getting closer & closer. You tried to focus your eyes, wondering what they could be, until you recognised Arthur’s blue coat & Javier’s colourful poncho.

“They’re back!” you exclaimed jumping from your seat & running outside to greet them

“Come on!” Javier yelled on approach “Someone help John down off this horse!”

“Can we get some help here?” Arthur asked as you rushed towards them both, quickly followed by Abigail, Bill & Lenny.

“You okay?” you him asked as Abigail ran up alongside you.

“You’re alive! Oh you’re alive” she cried as the two men helped John dismount “Come on let’s get you warm” she told him leading the way as Lenny & Bill helped him into the cabin.

You followed them in, holding back a touch, rolling your eyes as no sooner had John been laid up on the cot at the back of the room you heard Abigail starting to berate him.

“This is a new low, even by your standards”

A few days since John’s return, the blizzard had died off but you were still holed up inside Colter, waiting for the perfect opportunity to leave and set up camp somewhere a bit more comfortable. Each gang member had been taking it in turns to sit with John, checking he was okay and today was your turn.

Seeing that he had his eyes closed, you gently sat in the nearby chair and pulled a book out of your satchel.

“Dammit, you’re not gonna start reading to me now as well are you?” he joked “I’ve already had Dutch telling me all about Evelyn Miller’s latest one”

You laughed at the thought and moved closer looking at his bandaged face “How you feeling?”

“I’m still here ain’t I?” You nodded sympathetically “Listen, we’ve always been honest with each other, tell me the truth – how bad does it look?”

“I don’t….I …”

“Please (y/n), I need to know” he pleaded. Reaching back into your satchel you pulled out a small pocket mirror and handed it to him. “Well, shit” he mumbled assessing the damage.

“They should heal pretty well, Miss Grimshaw did a fine job of stitching you up” You told him, trying to cheer his spirits up.

“Well it looks like I’m stuck with these scars now” he replied absent mindedly running his hand across his bandaged cheek

“Jesus Christ, have you slept?” John asked looking at the dark circles etched under Dutch’s eyes

“Sleep?” His brows burrowed as he tried to understand the question “I don’t need sleep John, what I need…” he paused turning towards the rest of camp, many of whom had turned to see what the commotion was “…What I need is for you all… to have…. a little…. FAITH!’

John rolled his eyes and moved to walk away, before he heard Dutch speak behind him “Say it John”

“Say what?”

“Say that you….you have faith - faith in me”

John turned to look at his mentor. This wasn’t the Dutch that he knew, the one who saved his life all those years ago. The man that had just Hosea & Arthur on his side, keeping him strong and in check. No this weaker Dutch seemed to be listening less and less to his oldest friends, instead choosing to be slowly poisoned by the words & actions of one Micah Bell.

John sighed and resignedly said “I have faith Dutch” causing a smile to appear on the older man ‘s face. Dutch patted him on the back before walking back toward his tent with a spring in his step. Though as soon as he was out of earshot John muttered under his breath: “Maybe just not in you”

Heading towards the campfire, shaking his head in disbelief at what had just happened, John greeted Arthur who was already sat down, pushing a spoon around his bowl of stew – debating whether or not it was safe to eat. Looking up from his meal Arthur questioned,

“What the hell was all that commotion about?”

“He’s cracked” John simply replied, taking a seat on an empty crate. “I mean, all this talk of faith? What is up with that?”

“You know” Arthur whispered leaning closer “I reckon something’s not been right with him for a while, even before what happened at Blackwater.” His voice trailed off & he looked around to make sure nobody had overheard the conversation.

John nodded whilst reaching in his pocket for a smoke. “You ain’t wrong there. Did you notice how everything really when to shit just after that Micah turned up” he pointed out, before offering Arthur a spare cigarette that was willingly accepted.

“Hmm, I think you’re right there, Marston. There’s something about that guy that just rubs me up the wrong way and I just don’t understand why Dutch can’t see it”