#keminggris

We do not want to be a stumbling voice of a choice made by another, due to our inability to dream as big, due to our constant reminder of what might goes wrong that our head often lead. We do not want to be a rumbling noise of our ability to dislike ourselves, to another who does not share the same kind of view, to another who does feel full just with the presence of ours. We do not want to be a boring repetitive task another needs to accomplished, as if the burden life already throw it is lighter than the wind, as if the negativity that comes within the Horcruxes would be easy to ignore. 

Instead,

We want to be a joyful creature that with another the joy would be doubled, we want to be a proud self-carrier that with another the proud would be sprout, we want to be a muggle born who could stand strong on its own feet that with another the power to dominate the wizarding world would be possible to hold.

Human finds its way to hate other beings, could be to a fellow human, or worse, to a plant, probably. Just for the sake of the glory hatred. They might put a shiny big smile upon their faces, when the grumbles, deep down in their soul, could fire a rainy forest. Most part of the trigger to make the hatred stay is the fire itself. Is the ability to feel superior to others; the ability to being so right there is no way to being left or straight, any kind of way is wrong but theirs though; the ability to have the inability of openness. The ability to ignore.

The form of hatred itself could be any kind. Could be the frustrated child who unable to translate her words properly; could be a seemly cheerful lady who talk bad about anyone wholeheartedly; could be the childish old man who has too many options of different stories to tell meaninglessly; could be a girl who unable to chew a specific kind of food for the sake of being picky; could be a group of people who demonstrate of their superiority to others, and their rights to destruct anything different, oh the feeling, apparently, is a form of anxiety.

The mental is here. The ability to share the first world problem of its own, to take sympathy of other beings to the next level of victimisation, of its own. The same kind of narrative, the worse kind of attention seeking, the good part of being so sensitive to tiny little things that should’ve been not a big deal. The good part actually not make the world a better place, it made the world of others turn to black instead. 

Human is a joke, we grumble for attention. Problems aren’t there to be solved, though it definitely bothers the owner, human prefer to grumble about it, to complain, to gain sympathy, to feel as if they are cared (though they might be true about those opinion of their own as well). But to be a victim, when clearly it is untrue, create a lot of justification on what kind of human you truly are. We all have the basic problem of life, God shares it just as much, as much as the ability of our hand could handle. But the joke is real, some human love to think about the fact that their life is on the edge of this galaxy. That their problem is big, IS BIG, and they need to be sympathised.

The yellow one came along with wide smile put on its face. Whilst threw two thumbs up to the hexagonal mirror selfie. The yellow one has a tendency to forget about its own belonging, from its own phone, watch, to perhaps its own mind. For the nature of its own mind became so busy searching for any great upcoming greater plans for its own future. In which future not only for itself, but also a bigger circle we could proud of and thankful for.

The yellow one might forget about its own well-being. As if its life not only for itself, but also others around its surrounding. It might forget to eat, or at worse, eating badly or wrongly, by which it could get a stomach ache from time to time. It might get worried at times about its stomach condition, but overall, it is fine, as long as it gets enough food daily and drinks water as much. Thankfully, its mind well being is in a good state. Is in happy condition as ever. Which is a good point about its own well-being.

The yellow one is a good creature. Sometimes it appears like not listening when you are talking, it might busy plays its phone, or does something with its hand, but it actually does listen. Sometimes it appears like won’t give you a hand when you need it the most, it might busy plays its phone again, or does something with its hand again, but it actually does help. Out of your expectation.

Because expecting others to be good to you, to listen to your talks, when their appearance does not seem to do so, is a wrong thing to think at the first place. 

But the yellow one does listen, the yellow one does a good being. The yellow one just not so focus on one thing at times.

There would come a time when you yourself begin questioning your today. Yours very well made own today. As if today is kind of mislead. As if today sort of guiding weird light.

You ask yourself whether today was good enough, whether you yourself were happy enough to continue doing what happened on today. Whether everything you were doing today was a better candidate than the future you began to question.

Perhaps sometimes, it is not the future that seems blurry. It is today that blurrier. It is today that scarier. It is today that somehow so challenging to end.

It was the day when the sun laughed a little bit too loud. When its ray shone brighter than the friendly protective cloud. But it was fine because there is always a kind-hearted creature that appreciates it all greatly what the sun has brought. 

There was this human. With his eyes dazzled by the light, but still smile wider by the bright. Nothing could ever stop him that day from the joy of being alive and happily enjoyed the heat the sun has brought. When many of his kind, grumbled over the sun not-so-friendly light.

He is here now, doing all the vagueness he could throw. In which he thought other people may understand his joyful way of thinking flow.

He needs no worries though, because the sun already books a fine place he could always throw any joyful vagueness to him starting today and so.

We are all bad at something. Definitely more than two.

In my case, one of so many of it is telling a story as structured as possible. I can’t do it without pouring any extra concentration, pal. My mind often gets distracted every time I try to reach into a favorable path of storytelling. At the end of the day, I messed up a bit by adding one or two random stories into the ‘main topic’ and unsatisfied by my incompetence.

The other ones, I also think, way too often. People in my head unable to stop their freaking mouth to be cool to each other, or at least: me. I lowkey-ly like them anyway, as they made up many options before I decided to do something. Even though, at the end of the day, as there are many options ready to pick, I don’t pick any due to the possibilities it has to offer. Be open to any changes at it finest.... maybe not really.

Well, as I talk to myself almost (is never enough) every day, it’s obvious that I also talk bad to the most precious person in this universe ever alive: me. Again, it’s kind of unstoppable habit whenever I do something embarrassing openly (Like I foolishly not give a warm greeting to, let’s say, important person; or forget a person’s name just a moment after I was being introduced; and other receh stuffs).

You know what is the hardest part of being a normally functional human being? It’s giving the right emotional expression when we receive something from others. If there’s a test about it, I would for sure enroll for the same course next year. How do you able to express your gratitude when people whom you loved dearly give you a warm welcome after a long time no see? I would give them a smile and an awkward flat ‘I miss you too’ answer wholeheartedly; not quite help them to slow down their excitement, I told you.

I appreciate when people not volume up (to ‘another level’ of high pitch) their voice when they talk in front of me in public. Isn’t that kind of thing also bother others? That’s how I perceived, so I would love them to, again, slow down their excitement on talking about the topic they claimed themselves good.... wait I just crossed the line on talking just about something that I’m bad at and here I am, being myself like what the second paragraph talking about. Nice. Anyway, I would still like them just fine though.