#keely talks

i've been reading your radioapple fanfics for about a year and a half now, and i am absolutely in love with everything you write. the reason why your stories are particularly dear to me is that they helped me accept some things about myself, thanks to how you write alastor.

i've identified as bisexual for the past ten years now, but i've always felt like something was a little bit off with the way i experience sexual attraction and sexual relationships. still, i never thought i could be asexual, because i grew up in a tiny sheltered italian village, and the only few asexual people i know and got to talk to told me that they are asexual because they are sex repulsed, and that that's what it means to be asexual. on the internet, i always read that "asexuality is a spectrum", but i never really understood what it means or how it might apply to me.

for as long as i can remember, i've felt like there was something wrong with me, because i seemed to be unable to find anyone who experienced sex in the same way i did. and then, at a time in my life when i was under incredible stress, i looked for comfort on ao3 and happened to read one of your stories.

seeing the way you write alastor's approach to sex has truly opened my eyes. i had really never heard anyone say explicitly that it's okay to want to have sex, and not want to have an orgasm, and that doesn't mean you didn't like it or you didn't want to do it in the first place. i'm not sure if this is tmi, and i'm sorry if my thoughts are all over the place, but i wanted you to know how seen and understood you made me feel for the first time in my life. i hope you are happy to know that all the amazing the work you do isn't only entertainment for people. it was really important to me, and it felt important to tell you.

so, maybe i'm on the ace spectrum, maybe i'm not, but i definitely don't feel like there's something wrong with me anymore. thank you.

I apologize for taking so long to reply to this, I'm a little scatterbrained but I very much wanted to say that it makes me happy to hear my stories have helped you understand yourself a little more.

Often when I am writing, I like to explore ideas and themes that are important to me personally and Alastor's sexuality is very near and dear to my heart. It's a spectrum for sure and I wonder that anyone ever fits in the neat and tidy boxes that people have created for asexuality and sexuality as a whole. There is no right or wrong answer, and that answer may change and grow as we do, my idea of my own sexuality has certainly changed over the years!

It’s been a while so just wanted to pop in and say hi, update y’all about me. ✨

My name’s Keely and these are some things I like:

- Video games

- Comics

- Novels

- D&D

- Films

- Musicals

I was thinking about it ‘cause I’ve got brainrot for your BAON series (over the course of the past week I’ve binge read it nonstop and I think I’m close to being caught up on it) and there’s two routes to go here:

First option: songs like Invincible (it has a spicyhoney video for it on yt, i very much recommend)

It’s a very specific type of feeling, but Edge is from underfell and that is a Place so I think it fits. Honestly it’s probably the definition of a gooshy love song there, the lyrics are perfect: it’s basically saying that This is the person that I’d want and allow to help/save me in the event that I need it (which has got to be Quite a level of trust in UF), they make me powerful, together we’re “invincible.” It admits weakness then immediately strengthens past that when the other comes into the equation. Like- here we’ve got the whole “they complete me” trope in romance, who’s to say canceling out eachothers weaknesses isn’t exactly what Underfell would take from that?

Then there’s the second option: softer songs like honey bee (the one by steam powered giraffe)

More geared to their vibe here on the surface, specified to thoughts about Stretch and their situation. And yes It’s a breakup song but music is art and art can be interpreted however the viewer feels it aligns with them so who cares- but anyway yeah it’s slow, it’s sweet, it’s dripping with adoration and the lyrics match up So Well for them: I feel it’s safe to infer from his stance on their souls that edge doesn’t have a damn clue how he ended up with stretch as his husband but understood or not, stretch is here anyways. His honey bee does what he wants, thank you. It’s great, and I could continue this for multiple paragraphs but I already feel like I’ve talked Way Too Much here so I’m gonna cut that short.

Both of these feel like they Fit to me, but ultimately it’s a question of ‘when you take the boy out of underfell, how much punchy stays in the boy?’ The 2nd one would make sense and I don’t doubt he’d absolutely listen to stuff like that but what I don’t know is Would the 1st one still just hit harder for him?

Please, this has been bugging at me for days and i’d love to hear your thoughts

First, I am so delighted you've been enjoying the series!! I love these boys endlessly and I love getting to share them. 🧡

As to the question, oh, damn, that's a tough one. Both those songs are amazing spicyhoney songs and I agree that Invincible is great for an Underfell vibe. So true to their relationship, too.

I'd never heard the song Honeybee before, and it's going right on my playlist because that is a great Spicyhoney song. My heart, it is full, and it's a great Edge song since he canonically adores 'crooner' style music.

(If anyone has forgotten or is curious, when Edge was a kid in Underfell, Red found a busted up walkman for him and the only cassettes he had were the likes of Frank Sinatra and Sammy Davis Jr.)

That said, in my own mind, Edge has simple tastes when it comes to music and when it comes to Stretch, one of his favorites is 'At Last' by Etta James https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1qJU8G7gR_g

Growing up in Underfell, Edge never could have imagined someone like Stretch even existed, much less what he would become for him. He wasn't looking for someone to share his life with, he was content enough with what he had. It was Stretch who came to him and can a person even recognize loneliness for what it is until someone comes into your life and then is suddenly gone...and then returns? He certainly didn't and it was Stretch who taught him, unintentionally, a lesson learned with a first kiss.

I don't, sadly, mostly because in my head, any song can be a spicyhoney song if you try. 😂

I can give a couple of faves, though! I like to think that if Stretch ever did karaoke again, the cover of S&M by Mi Nemesis would be about how he'd tease Edge. (sorry, there's no free version online, but you can find it on spotify.)

If I want to cause myself emotional pain, I like the song 'Slow Motion' by David Gray. Seems like a 'reset' song to me, just before they forget each other. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nOkUhbmlXOk

I Guess That's Why They Call It the Blues - Elton John, the two of them missing each other while Edge is away working. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h6KYAVn8ons

I love the idea of Stretch showing Edge all the ways sex can be amazing and learning some new things about himself in the process, and my mental song for that one is: Your Body is a Wonderland John Mayer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N5EnGwXV_Pg

I'm just wandering down my regular playlist now, hmmm, I always liked Evil Ways by Blues Saraceno as a Red song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7lzZ-tGKKzU

Oh, man, She Keeps Me Warm by Mary Lambert, that makes me think of how Edge looks at Stretch, 'I named both of her eyes forever and please-don't-go', mm, honey, yes, he's not going anywhere. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NhqH-r7Xj0E

I wrote at least one story listening to Chandelier by Sia on repeat because that one makes me think of Stretch when he's at his lowest, trying desperately to be the fun party guy while he slips lower and lower. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2vjPBrBU-TM

I could go on forever, eek, but I'll add

Issues: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Ke4480MicU

Something just like this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FM7MFYoylVs

Listen to the Man" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZS0WvzRVByg

We Just Disagree: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UM25yd-ePco

Haven't Met You Yet: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1AJmKkU5POA

Also loving the whole 'verse spiceyhoney deserves more love and the UF bros loving and supporting each other but being shaped by their fucked up world is beautiful.

Thank you so much!! 🥰

Ah, I don’t think it’s spoiling anything to say that the collaring traditionally only goes one way in Underfell. It’s not always a sign of a romantic/sexual relationship, (Red did wear Edge’s after all) although Edge was the one who recognized it as a betrothal collar.

I'd like to see Stretch get a box of chicken gear from his fans. He could be chicken from head to foot, to the point Edge refuses to leave the house with him.

"You don't even normally wear boxer shorts! No one can even see them!"

"but babe! your expression when i take off my pants makes it all worth it."

"If you keep dressing like that, MY pants aren't going to be coming off any time soon!"