#john roy

Wood Engraving Wednesday

John Roy

These wood engravings are by American artist John Roy (1930-2001) produced for an edition of Mexican-American poet and University of Texas Spanish professor Miguel González-Gerth's (1926-2017) collection of poems, The Infinite Absence, printed in 1964 by Kim Merker (1932-2013) at his Stone Wall Press in Iowa City in an edition of 250 copies.

Our copy, a gift from our late friend Jerry Buff (1931-2025), bears a presentation inscription form the author to Spanish-Canarian literary critic and essayist Juan Marichal (1922–2010).

View other wood engravings by John Roy.

In the Smart Museum of Art, an alumnus at the 1978 reunion views John, a painting by Chuck Close of the artist John Roy.

Hey all, my Entirely Free Comedy Class is now over five years old, and looking back, it could be clearer and better, and more detailed.  So I’m revising it.  And the first week is ready.  Here it is!

WEEK ONE

In every major city, someone is teaching a stand-up comedy class, often charging hundreds of dollars for the effort. While I know some professional comics who have benefited from these classes, the majority consensus among my fellow comedians is that they are of dubious value.

They may help a little to build courage and comfort on stage, but they will not replace any of the many hours you will have to spend in Open Mics if you want to tell jokes for a living.

There is only one way to get good at stand-up comedy, and that is to do stand-up comedy. There is no short cut.  There is no homework.  You can practice your jokes in your room until they are tight and polished.  You can practice them on the very stage you are going to tell them on.  You still won't know if they are funny they are until they encounter a live audience.  You can't know anything about a joke until an audience of everyday people, who expect to laugh, reacts to it.  

A comedy class is an artificially supportive environment.  You can't get the honest reactions you need to build an act from fellow students and a teacher who wants a good Yelp review.  Only performing stand-up in real “game time” conditions will do.  Not only do you need to learn on the job, you can only learn on the job.  For the comedy beginner, there is no substitute for the open mic.

I am not saying stand-up instruction is impossible.  I'm not saying all you can tell a new  comic is to go out, plow through their sets with no game plan, and hope for the best.  I did that.  It was a nightmare.

I would love to have had some kind of road map to help me know what to focus on.  I got important advice later in my career that I would have loved to have had access to at the start.  Many aspects of this art form took me years of wrong turns to figure out.  I would love to spare the next generation some of that confusion.  They might get better quicker if I could tell them what they needed to know right when they needed know it.

This is my twelve week class on stand-up comedy.  It's everything I've learned about writing and performing comedy. This book is the textbook.  Your city's open mics are the classroom. And through the magic of Youtube, the best comedians of all time will be your guest speakers.  

Read one chapter a week.  Watch the featured video clips and answer the study questions.  Then put the instructions into practice at your local Open Mics.  After you have gone up at least three times practicing the lessons of that week, read the next chapter. Repeat for twelve weeks.

There are two goals of the class. One is for you to have a five minute set you can do at any comedy showcase with confidence.  The second, more important goal is give you an effective process for improving your act that you can use as long as you do stand-up comedy.  It's the  

process I use every week to this day.

I focus on basic fundamentals. I don’t tell you what to write or talk about. Previous books about stand-up presented a “right way” to write jokes.  As the sheer variety of modern comedians shows, there isn't one.  My process can help you with any style you might choose. As long as the essential elements of comedy are present, you can make people laugh any way you like.  

Assignment One:

Find out where the comedy open mics in your area are.  Maybe they are on a web site that lists all the comedy shows in your city.  Maybe they are listed with the music shows of the week.  Maybe you can find them listed among the offerings of local theater companies.  Googling your city's name and “comedy open mic” is as good a way to start as any.  Find out how many you can go to this week.  

Find out what you need to do to perform on them.  Sign up if necessary.

If at all possible, go to open mics that are listed as specifically for comedy.  This class was designed with those in mind.  

It may be hard to find comedy open mics in some areas.  If this is the case, all is not lost.  Many music open mics will let you do stand-up as well, but you'll want to check with the host and venue first.  If you don't know who to talk to at a venue, ask the bartender.  They always know.  

Music open mics will be a tougher audience to crack.  You will have the added challenge of getting the audience to stop talking and focus. Music acts generally do not require an audience's undivided attention the way comedians do.  That will be something you have to earn.  If you can grab them and make them laugh on a night that's not conducive to comedy, that's a win you can be proud of.

Assignment Two:

Write five minutes of material.  

What sort of material? This is up to you.

I know this is a vague assignment that doesn't give the student much guidance.  Even the word “material” is vague.  It seems specifically chosen to describe as little as possible.  It just means “something that exists.”  It doesn't get any clearer when you look at the other words comedians use to describe what

makes up their act.  “Stuff.” “Chunks.” “Bits.”  Bits of what?

Well, bits of whatever you can think of that might make someone laugh. You'll need all of it.  Those skewed insights on life you've had over the years?  Those things in the world everyone thinks are normal but you can prove are actually insane? Remember your analogy that made your  friend say “I never thought of it that way”    You finally have a place for all that stuff.   And they give you a microphone!  

As a famous comedian once said, “You should write whatever you can't stop thinking about.”

Still stuck?  Don't worry.  It's understandable.  You haven't had any practice.  Somehow, for all the millions of different writing assignments you get in school, “Write something funny” never comes up.

Try this.

  Think of something you said that made your friends laugh. What additional information would strangers need to have to laugh at that?  What words could quickly explain the situation and context just enough that the funny part made sense?  Add those words in before the part you said to your friends.  Your punch line now has a setup line.  You now have a joke.

I've written many jokes this way.

Once a brutish guy came up to me after my act and said “it’s weird you’re hanging out after the show. Most comedians won't hang out after the show.”   He said “comedians” like a snotty kid would if they were going, “Ooh... look at the big comedian.”

I didn't respond to the tone in his voice.  I was nice. “That’s weird, we always hang out after the show,”  I said. We do.

The guy ignores it.  He says, “Fucking queers don’t want to drink with me.”  Oh, he's a bigoted asshole, I thought.  No wonder no one wants to drink with him.

I whispered to my friend Adam, under my breath, “Now I get it.”   He laughed.

In real life, I only said “Now I get it,” and Adam laughed.  I didn't need to describe the guy.  Adam was looking right at him.  I didn't need to tell Adam we were at a comedy show.  He was with me the whole time.  All Adam needed was “Now I get it,” and it was funny.  An audience of strangers needs more.

When I related the story in my act, I began, “I go all over doing comedy. Sometimes you meet cool people. Sometimes you don’t.” I described the guy's initial question, and how I was confused because comedians always hang out after the show.  Then I did his asshole voice going “Fucking queers don't want to drink with me,” followed by, “and I was like, “Now I get it.”   I got a laugh in the same place as I got it from Adam that night.  

With those modifications, something I said that made my friend laugh became a joke I could do on stage.

Incidentally, Adam doesn't appear in the joke at all.  His presence at the scene is not essential to why it's funny.  The joke is about me and the guy, not Adam.  That night, Adam was the audience.  In a comedy show, I have a real audience.  Telling them that Adam was there is just needless words that don't serve my purpose, which is to get a laugh when I say, “Now I get it.”  You only need to include what the crowd absolutely needs to know to get the joke.  Everything else should go.  

Don’t spend more than five hours writing your material.

It's not a novel, it's five minutes of comedy.  

The important thing is to get up on that stage as soon as possible. Don’t put off that first performance.   I know it can be scary.  It may be nerve-wracking when you picture yourself up there, but prolonging the wait only makes it scarier.  Best to rip the band-aid off as quickly as possible.  Your fear will diminish once the experience is no longer a scary unknown.

Some people wait months and months trying to hone the perfect material before they do their first set.  This is pointless.  There is no way to anticipate the reaction your jokes will get before you tell them. Further hours of editing are a waste of time.  Get your ideas in front of an audience as soon as possible.  You will have all the time in the world to re-write it later, when you actually know what worked.

Some of you may be asking, “Wait! What if I don’t want to write ‘jokes?’ What if I want to do characters or tell stories or just talk to the crowd? Why can’t I get laughs that way?”

You can! You can do anything you want as long as you can get them to laugh after you do it.

Stories and character monologues work a lot like “jokes.”  If one of these is your thing, for every sentence in this book that mentions “jokes,” just replace “joke” with “character monologue line” or “story beat” and the principles are the same.  

Keep in mind that a stand-up story has to have laughs peppered throughout the entire piece.  It can’t just pay off at the end. No matter what approach you take, you are still going to have to make the audience laugh at the rate they are accustomed to, which is roughly between two and four laughs a minute.  You can make them wait longer here and there to build tension, but the longer they have to wait, the bigger that payoff is going to need to be as well.  Stand-up is both the widest and the most narrow form of performance there is. You can do anything you want…. as long as the audience does one specific thing over and over again.  

Improv and talking to the crowd are a little tougher to teach than jokes. They rely on you being funny in the moment. They are a product of your pure comedy instincts and the amount of practice you’ve had expressing them.  The only way to improve is to start racking up stage time doing improv and crowd work,the way an athlete must practice being in the moment to perform better in those moments. Week Nine of this class is devoted to doing just that.

For now, follow the joke writing exercises and develop written material anyway. It is the best way to learn what makes a series of words funny. Think of it as practicing improv in slow motion.  Besides, improvisers and crowd workers like Rory Scovel and Jeff Ross still need something to do on TV sets where they don’t let you wing it.  Even in your live act, it can help to have some surefire lines.  While improv can light up a crowd like nothing else in comedy, it misses sometimes.  It's unavoidable.  You will appreciate having tested jokes to fall back on when the riffing doesn't work.

Write your new five minutes in a dedicated space for this class.  It can be a notebook.  It can be a computer file.  But it should have no other writing in it.  I find a small notebook is the best because you can carry it anywhere.  If you prefer to just type your bits into your phone that works too, but I feel that writing words out long-hand helps commit them to memory.  

I advise writing your jokes out in full sentences, but if you can remember:

“I gotta get healthier. I can’t have one more day go by where the BEST thing I can say about myself is that the pot I smoked made me too lazy to eat Carl’s Jr. TWICE.”

from:

“Gotta Get healthier/best thing I can say/too lazy from pot to eat Carl’s Jr. 2x”

…then I am not going to make you write it all out just because I think you should. But the MINUTE you find yourself staring at “Candy Crush/Slot Machine guy WTF?” in your own handwriting with no idea what it means, it's complete sentences from now on. A forgotten bit could be the Netflix Special closer that now you’ll never have.

Assignment Three

Once your five minutes is written down, it's time to memorize it. Don't freak out from the “m” word.  You don't necessarily have to know it word for word.  But some level of memorization is necessary.  You don’t want to be in actual danger of forgetting the point of what you’re talking about.

Some people like the certainty of knowing the words by heart. It's one less thing to worry about, and besides, they’re proud of that wording so why not make sure to show it off?

Others find memorization a source of stress and would rather not have another thing hanging over their head they have to remember not to screw up. For them, a loose idea they can sort of “jam on” is better.

Whichever sounds best to you is how you should do it, as starting out in stand-up is all about increasing your comfort level as you do something that provokes intense anxiety.

However you choose, I have found that whether a joke was written out verbatim the minute the idea appeared or whether it took ten tries through informal riffing, a “right way” based on brevity and the strongest, most colorful word choices begins to suggest itself. By the time a joke is ready to be recorded, even the “jazziest” comics tell it pretty similarly from night to night.

There are advantages and drawbacks to both approaches. A memorized joke sounds polished and can be delivered with confidence, each syllable emphasized for maximum

power. You may discover interesting language sitting down and writing that your onstage riffing brain would never have landed on in the moment.

On the flip side, there is a directness and energy to an improvised wording that a memorized bit can lack. It sounds like you're just hanging out with the audience and that's powerful.  

When you script a bit out verbatim, there can be a tendency to think of it as “set in stone.”  You deliver the lines like an actor and only those lines.  You can forget that there is always room to add things because you are not talking “in the moment.”

Personally, I go up with at least one written-out punchline for each new bit that I intend to work on. On a fresh page, I write down all the punchlines and premises in a list before I go up. The Carl’s Jr. bit from above might be listed as “Lazy/Pot/Carl’s Jr.”

My set list might look like this:

Lazy/Pot/Carl's Jr.

Comedians don't hang out/Now I get it

40/Green Day

40/Close Bar/Bulls

Favorite Gay Bar/Ke$ha

After it's all written out, I take the list up with me and riff.  No matter what, I always make sure I hit at least one prepared punchline for each subject I bring up.  That way, bomb or crush, the audience will know I had a purpose to each bit. You will test their patience if they feel you are just meandering around with no payoff.  They will check out.  I feel I owe it to them to reward their attention with at least one thought-out comedic idea for each of my premises.  They should know I respected them enough to at least have a point to each of my ramblings, even if the jokes don't all land.

If they happen to really like one of those punchlines, I will keep talking, in case I find something else funny. They seem to like where this is going, so let’s find out what else is there.  This has lead to great stuff, but if it’s a dead end, at least they got a solid joke they liked before I went exploring.

Over time, as the repetition and trial and error process continues, I find my jokes inevitably find their way into a series of words that changes little from night to night.  It's the best way I have found to get that idea out, and I know it by heart.

Assignment Four

Do your five new minutes at an open mic.  Then do this same five minutes at two more open mics.  Write down what worked and what didn't, but don't adjust anything yet.  Perform the same jokes in the same order.

With the amount of people trying to do comedy now, some open mics give you just four, three, and sometimes even two and a half minutes to do your act.  If this happens, do as much of your material as you are able to get out in the time allotted, but don't rush.  Tell your jokes the way you think they work best.  Don't try to jam them all in just to say you did it. Get to what you can and give those jokes the best chance they have to succeed.

Assignment Five

After your week of performances, or however long it takes to do a set at three open mics, look over your notes.

Write down your answers to the following questions.   In the back of this book, you can find them on the easy to copy “Set Questions” Worksheet.

Set Questions

Which of your jokes got a laugh?

Which jokes didn’t?

Why do you think the jokes that did work worked?

Why do you think the jokes that didn’t work didn’t?

What could you change about the ones that didn’t work to maybe make them work?

Could changing jokes that worked make them work even better?

Keep this info handy for next week.  We will get into it in depth.

Assignment Six:

When you've done your three performances, and you've written down your initial thoughts about your jokes, search the internet for the late, great Greg Giraldo's special “Midlife Vices.”  It is currently view-able on Youtube.

Watch the special.

Answer the following questions.  They are also printed out on an easy-to-copy Worksheet in the back of this book.  It's the one that says “Video Questions.”  Every week there will be comedians to watch and you will answer these same questions every time, so making a bunch of copies of this one might be a good idea.

Video Questions

How would you describe the comic's stage character, that is to say, the personality they present in their act?

Were the jokes presented as true stories from life?  Or clearly false “jokes?”

What made you laugh in their act? Why?

What didn’t work for you? Why? Why do you think it may have worked for others?

How did the comic use their body to get laughs?

How did the comic use their face to get laughs?

How did the comic use their voice to get laughs?

What did you notice that made their act unique?

How did the comic structure the jokes that they wrote?

You will find answers at the beginning of next week's lesson.

Congratulations John Roy for the Honourable mention at the Portage Ceramic Awards 2018 :)

While the title is timely, John Roy handcrafted a pretty sweet hour with his latest album Everything’s Burning.

Roy’s pinpoint observations on the world and himself are distilled to their purest essence and dripped for all their worth. Also, John’s execution is, as it has been for quite some time, flawless as well.

This album, if anything, gives a nice break from seeing everything burning. Get a taste of it here.

WEEK TWO

You made it!  You're alive and you're back for more.  That's great.

First, a huge round of applause for doing what the vast majority of people who think about doing stand-up never do. You did stand-up  Someone, somewhere, right now, is telling their friend at the bar how they always wanted to do it, and you have gone and actually done it.  The next time it comes up, you can be the only one in the conversation to say, “I've done stand-up”  And that's for the rest of your life. However it went, and we will delve into all the ways it could have gone soon enough, you deserve real praise for making it happen at all.  A character in Stephen King's “The Dead Zone” remarks on how the world is split into two groups: “bullshit people” and people who do what they say they're going to do.  It's a tough standard, but on this one thing at least, you're in group two.

It's a scary thing to do.  Those studies where people say they fear public speaking more than death aren't just something someone made up.  Even though stand-up comedy is far less likely to harm you than taking a shower, that fear is real.  Those of us who do this for a living felt it too, and sometimes still do.  It's just that our desire to do it is stronger.  And so was yours.  

Okay, that's enough. We have sufficiently admired your participation trophy.  Put it down, and get out your notes.  It's time to get to work. First things first:

The Answers to Last Week's Video Questions

I asked you to watch “Midlife Vices” and fill out the worksheet. There are many possible correct answers to these questions.  Everyone will be struck by different things when watching the special, and because the special is so good, there are a bunch of things you could've picked.   A highlight for me is The Obama/McCain bit.  His joke quickly cuts straight to the heart of the issue, and his exasperation as McCain is sold so well.

  But whatever your specific answers, there are two things I hope you saw.

I hope you recognized that this was the work of a true master.  You can’t get better than Giraldo.  Everything that makes up great comedy is on display here: a strong point of view, an energetic, compelling, and precise performance, and clear, engaging writing. “Midlife Vices" is a tour de force.

I also hope that watching Giraldo drew your attention to the performance side of stand-up. Reviews often focus solely on the content of a comedy special, as if only what the performer is saying counts, and not how they say it.  If that were true, why bother to perform the jokes at all?  Why not just print out the script and hand it out?  I wanted you to pay attention to all the movements and facial expressions that add up to create an effective stand-up act.  

If parts of it weren't your thing and you weren't feeling it, don't worry.  There are many clips of wildly different styles coming up and something will be sure to line up with your tastes.  Comedy isn't track and field, where you're either the fastest or you're not.  It's not even diving, where the judges all basically agree what a success looks like.  Lots of people can be equally good at the same time, and no one is going to like all of them.  Laughter is an involuntary reaction and there is no argument than can make something funny for you.  Just understand that there is a difference between comedy that isn't to your liking and comedy that isn't effective.  And if “Midlife Vices” wasn't your cup of tea, take some time to watch it again until you can understand why the people in that theater are going nuts.

Grinding

You should now have performed stand-up comedy three times.  Please wait until you have done that to continue.  You won't get anything out of reading ahead.  These lessons are just words until you can relate to them from experience on stage.

Ideally you were able to do all three sets in one week.  If that can't work for you because of your schedule or your area, you can space them across two weeks.  You will ultimately need to raise that to three if you intend to go professional, though.  Once or twice a week is fine for the purposes of this class, or to see if you even enjoy it. Beyond that, you simply will not improve quickly enough if you can't increase it to three or more.  Stand-up is a physical activity that relies on muscle memory.  The memory of how your last set felt must be fresh in your mind to learn from. Perform less than three times a week, and it fades.  You have to constantly re-learn lessons that don't stick.  You seriously handicap your rate of growth. You will have to consider changing your work schedule or city of residence if you decide to get serious about stand-up as more than a hobby.

However, if you are one of the lucky ones able to go up more than three times in week, don’t skip ahead to the next week of the class after three shots at it. Take advantage of your good fortune and practice the same lesson all week. You will have a really solid handle on it when Monday rolls around.

Give It Up, Everybody

It's best if you do your sets for this class free from any chemical influences. If you had a beer or a shot or a puff of weed before you went up this week, I understand.  I didn’t say anything about it in Week One because I just wanted you to get on stage and get started, whatever it took.  There is nothing wrong with having a small amount of a legal substance before you go up every now and then.  There is something wrong with needing it.  I’d like you to go up without it for the rest of the class.  

I understand some of you may like to calm your anxieties.  Fear of performing is natural.  I had it for years. Conquering that fear is part of stand-up, and learning to do it from within, on your own, is necessary to becoming a comedian. Using intoxicants to skip that step creates much bigger problems down the road, especially in a world that will never stop pushing free alcohol at you.  

I don’t care what you do after the show, but during this class’ duration, go up sober.  So many formative experiences happen here at the beginning. You owe it to yourself to observe them as carefully as possible.

This Mic Sucks

Hopefully at least one of your performances this week took place in a room that wasn’t empty, full of jaded comics who didn’t listen, or drunken patrons talking over the comedy.  Unfortunately, a lot of open mics fall in to one of these categories.  It’s something you are just going to have to deal with, the way a golfer accepts that sometimes the course is a goat track.  

The worse the circumstances, the harder it is to measure how well your jokes did.  When the audience isn't giving big laughs to anyone, you need to tune your ear to whatever they are giving out.  Watch comedy until someone on the show genuinely makes you laugh. Listen for the level of audience response to that joke.  That's what counts as a “win” in that room.  Get a laugh that big or higher, and your joke is a keeper.

Of course, difficult comedy nights don't need to stay that way.  Open Mics are direct reflections of the comics that populate them. If you want a more supportive Open Mic, be a part of that change.  If you want a great audience, work at being a great audience member.  Laugh when you think something’s funny. Watch the other comics’  sets. Keep your face out of your phone when someone’s doing their act. If someone you like is going up, tell the person next to you that this comic is funny.  They will be more likely to listen and laugh. Buy something from the venue.  Get to know the staff.  Tip well. Get them behind the show.  Just a couple comics working to foster the kind of environment where they would like to perform can make a big difference.

Assignment One

Think back on your experiences this week.  Answer these questions wherever you are writing all this shit.  As always, there is a copy in the Worksheets section.

How did it feel to go on stage?

What did you enjoy?

What did you not enjoy?

Who was your favorite performer of the night?

Why?

Assignment Two

Think of everyone you saw go up this week.  Which comic did you enjoy the most?  Fill out a Video Questions Worksheet about their performance. Compare the answers to the ones you gave for “Midlife Vices.”   Notice anywhere they were similar to Greg?  What did they do differently?

Assignment Three

Who was your least favorite performer of the night? Why?

Think back on their set.   Find the Unsuccessful Set Questions Worksheet in the back of the book, with all of the other handy worksheets.  They are like the Video Questions but flipped backwards.

Unsuccessful Set Questions

How would you describe the comic's stage character, that is to say, the personality they present in their act?

Were the jokes presented as true stories from life?  Or clearly false “jokes?”

Why do you think you didn't laugh?

Did anything work in their act?  Why do you think those bits worked and not the others?

How did the comic's use of their body fail to get laughs?

How did the comic's use of their face fail to get laughs?

How did their voice work fail to get laughs?

What did you notice that made their act uniquely unappealing?

How did the comic structure the jokes that they wrote?

Assignment Four

You are now the Head Writer for your own act and that act requires material.  Constantly.

Keep something to write in that fits in your pocket.  It could be a notebook, a journal, or an app on your phone.  Record anything you say throughout the week that makes someone else laugh. Record anything you think or see that makes you laugh.  You need to do this from now on. You cannot afford to waste anything that might become a joke.

I said this last week, but I'm saying it again.   Make sure you write the whole idea down.    You may think that one or two key words should be enough for you to remember what you meant.  Believe me, from experience, a lot of times it isn’t, and that idea never comes back.

Assignment Five

Once a week, look through what you have and try to form the writing into jokes.  Ask yourself why you thought it was funny, or why someone laughed when you said it.  Add in the information you would have to tell an audience for them to get it.

Assignment Six

Pull out the jokes you told last week.  Pick a title for each joke. Whatever feels like it will trigger the bit in your mind best.  The first thing you think of is usually the right one. “Lazy/Pot/Carl's Jr.” can now be written as “Carl's Jr.”  “Comedians don't hang out/Now I get it”  becomes “Comedians.”

Now list all of your jokes from last week this way, in the order you performed them in. Look them over.

Did any of them work?  Congratulations. You just did what most people who try stand-up never achieve. You got a laugh.   From scratch.  You thought of something, you performed it, and people laughed.  That moment is the basic building block of stand-up comedy, and you proved you can make it happen.  You can do this.

Did none of your bits work? Don’t despair or panic. You just had the same first set experience as some of the funniest comedians who ever lived.  It is so completely normal for your first set not to work that it isn’t worth a second thought.  On top of that, you just did the hardest thing there is to do in stand-up  You bombed. Congratulations, you just endured the worst thing comedy can do to you. You also found that it did not kill you. There is no longer anything to fear!

Now it’s time to figure out why the jokes aren't working.  I deliberately told you not to adjust anything last week, even when a joke didn't work on night one.  I wanted you to experience the frustration that only a bit that bombs can give you.  Now let's get under the hood and see if we can't stop it from happening again.

When a joke fails, the problem can only be two things: writing or performance.  Let's look at performance first.  Did you perform your material clearly?  Could they understand your words?  Let's find out.

Assignment Seven

Make an audio recording of your next set.  People often think they are talking clearly when in fact they are racing through their words, mumbling, or yelling. Make sure the audience can understand the jokes.  In our little corner of show business, that's the whole game. Green

Day can do a concert in Argentina and it won't matter if the crowd understands the words because the music carries the experience. Comedians need complete comprehension of our every word or the whole act is a failure.

Assignment Eight

Think about the audiences last week.  Were they comfortable with you? This is important.  Your friends laugh easily when you're hanging out because they know you and like you.  The audience just saw you for the first time.  They don't know how they feel yet.

Think about how you began your shows last week.  Did you start telling jokes from the minute your set began?  Just launching into your material at the top of the set can be jarring. You are a new element in the show. The audience needs time to take you in and get comfortable with you.

Next time you perform, take five seconds before you say anything at all. Let the audience get used to looking at you. Let them find a context for what you're going to say.  Then they will be ready to process your jokes.  If you have a specific character that you want them to see, you will want to be in character during this moment as well.  If not, just be yourself and let them get used to that.  

You may feel that five seconds is too long to wait at the top of every set.  I think I myself wait around two and a half.  But taking some amount of time before you start talking for the audience to get used to you can only improve their reaction.

Assignment Nine

At some point this week or next;  after you've done the five second pause; take ten seconds before opening your mouth. This is much longer than you normally would and will feel awkward in the room.

Doing this just once is fine, but I want you to watch the audience assess and scrutinize you.  It's going to happen every set for the rest of your life, and I want you to observe what it looks like closely without trying to tell jokes.  Study their faces.  Watch the wheels turn as they try to figure you out. They want to be comfortable enough with you to be able to laugh.

Maybe you can help them.  During this ten seconds, without using words, try to convey to the audience whatever you would like them to get about you or your stage character.  Act like the kind of person you want them to see.  You may even get a laugh or two from a facial expression.  See if you can see the audience's faces changed based on your actions.  

This exercise is also here as a toughness builder.  You need to get used to standing there in awkward silence so you're not afraid of it. Jokes will tank.  You will lose crowds.  Silences will occur and you need to be cool with that and not fear it.  

Silence can even be your friend.  A long pause like this can be helpful in the middle of a set

that’s gone haywire.  Say people in the audience begin talking to each other or a joke went down hard, a long pause can reset the table.  It can focus an audience’s attention. Silence and stillness can prompt people to look and listen more carefully.  Silence is a part of comedy, and the sooner you can tolerate it comfortably, the better.

Assignment Ten

Enough about the audience's comfort level for a second.  How about yours? Were you comfortable with your space?  Was the stool in your way? The mic stand? This can take you off your game.  A visibly annoyed comic is hard to enjoy.  

Next time you go up, before you start telling jokes, take time to ensure your performance space is how you like it. Hate that mic stand? Get it out of there. Want to sit on the stool? Do it.   Don't have a joke get ruined because you start walking across the stage and realize the microphone cord is three feet long, stop in your tracks, and flub the punchline.

We are our own Stage Manager as well as Director and Actor and Writer and everything else. Arranging the stage for your show is your job as well.  Even if that show is three minutes long on the middle of an open mic.

Check the tech as well. You may not have a sound engineer at an open mic, but if the microphone is off, broken, screeching, or covered in the spit of the last performer, deal with that before the set starts.  

Are You Joking?

If the audience could understand your jokes clearly, and you were comfortable enough and situated enough to give a competent performance and it still didn’t work at all, it’s time to look at your writing.  

If your approach isn't bearing fruit, you need to make sure your jokes are properly constructed. You may have just gotten a little nervous at that last bit.   Didn't I say there was no “right way” to write comedy?  Didn't I say I believed in letting you write whatever you like?  Of course.  A joke can be about anything in the world, it can be performed any way you like, but it has to be a joke.

All jokes have two things in common:  a moment where the comic sets up an expectation, and a moment when they fulfill that expectation in a surprising way.   What does that mean?  For a second, let's stop analyzing jokes and listen to one.  

“I used to drink a lot,” says Dave Attell to the crowd, in a knowing tone like he's over it now,“but that was way back... there.”  He points to the bar in the back of the club.

In this twelve word joke, it's easy to see both essential joke elements. Attell sets up the expectation that we are going to hear how long ago this drinking took place, but he surprises us by fulfilling it in a way we can't see coming.  His drinking didn't back in the past, but in the

back of this very room.  Our use of the word “back” to mean both time and distance allows Dave to hide the meaning switch until the very last word. All at once, our image of Dave turns in a second from brave recovered addict to a drunk so gone he's hammered right now.

A joke sets an expectation and delivers what was promised, but in a way you don't expect.  Once you know how to look for that, you will see these two elements at work throughout comedy.  In the hands of a master, it can be done so subtly, you can't see a joke there at all.  But if they said something and you laughed, those two things had to be present.  The trick was just done on too high a level to notice it.  But to get there you have to conquer the basics.  You have to learn to poach an egg before you can capture the essence of juevos rancheros in a foam.

Assignment Eleven

Let's dissect some jokes.  Anthony Jeselnik is an exceptional joke writer, and he works in a very old-school way.  His bits have perfect structure. Understanding what makes them work can help you diagnose why your jokes may not have clicked the way you wanted them to.

Google him on “Just For Laughs 2012” and a three minute clip will come up.

Answer all the Video Questions from the worksheet in the back of this book about Mr. Jeselnik's set.   The same way you did for Greg Giraldo. Asking these questions of each new comedian you encounter will deepen your understanding of the art form. Hopefully it will spark ideas on how to approach your own act as well.  All done?  This week let's take an extra step.

Write out Anthony’s jokes.  I’m serious. Word for word.  For each joke, circle the group of words with the most surprising element of the joke. This is the Punchline. This is where the audience’s expectations are fulfilled, but with an added twist they didn’t expect.

Now look through the other sentences in each joke you circled.  Answer these questions.

What did Anthony lead you to expect?

How did he do this?  

What did he give you instead?

What was the element in the resolution that was unexpected?

Now go back to your jokes from last week. Make sure what the audience is being told to expect is clear. Make sure the surprising element comes later, and after all the information they need to know for it to work. I am not asking you to Jeselnik-ize your own writing.  Be yourself.  I am simply asking you to identify the basic elements of joke structure. Then make sure your own jokes contain these elements, in whatever way you like. They gotta be in there somewhere, or you have written words, but not a joke.

Assignment Twelve

The elements of expectation and surprising fulfillment are not as easily identified in every comedian's act as they are in Mr. Jeselnik's. They are always there, however.

Google “James Adomian Just For Laughs Chicago” and watch the clip that comes up.

Adomian does not work in the strict set up/punch style Anthony uses. Stories and character monologues abound, all in a conversational style. Underneath it are the exact same elements.

Fill out a Video Questions Worksheet for Mr. Adomian's set.  Then go back through his act. Write down as many examples as you can of an expectation he sets up and its unexpected fulfillment.

See how many pairs you find. They will start to reveal themselves everywhere as you get better at spotting them. Once you have found such pairs in James’ act, write one of the jokes out as a two sentence joke.  In other words, strip away Adomian's conversational style and write his jokes in the most direct setup/punchline manner, the way Anthony Jeselnik might write it.  Do it a couple more times until it becomes second nature.

You can write any way you like, but the elements of expectation and a surprising fulfillment of that expectation are necessary for comedy writing to work.  They should always be present in your work. Even in the absurdist act of Steve Martin, in which a joke might simply be Martin standing there with a gas nozzle and gloating, these principles apply.

This is an actual Martin bit from Live at the Hollywood Bowl. For a long time, Martin stands silently, holding a gas nozzle.  No hose.  Then, looking smug, Steve says “I got this...”    

He pauses, very pleased with himself.

“For five bucks.”

Even here, you can find the essentials.  The silent pose with a bizarre prop is the set up.  Your expectations about a man with a broken piece of a gas pump kick in in your brain.  It's not normal.  Why is he doing this?  He’s going to have to address it at some point. Then he does.  He brags about the price.  The last thing you could have expected him to bring up.  Even in this strangest of comedy pieces, the two basic elements are there.

Assignment Thirteen

Get ready to do three more open mics.  Get out your jokes from last week. Write any that bits got a laugh down at the top of this week’s set list. I want you to open with those jokes this week.

Opening with something that you know has worked in the past is a good way to get the audience to trust that you are funny.  They are more likely to give your set a fair listen.

You will also get a quick read on the room. Open with something that usually works and you

can gauge what a decent joke gets from this crowd right off the bat.

You also start your set comfortably, not anxious from attempting something new.  You look confident, and the crowd gets comfortable quickly.

Assignment Fourteen

As you look over the jokes that work, think of ways you might improve them.

I hesitate to give you too much specific advice here.  I don’t want to influence the development of your own personal style.  Patton Oswalt said that giving a comedian advice only makes that comedian more like you.  That's not helpful.  After being funny, being unique is the most important thing in stand-up  I don't want to leave you completely in the dark though if you're feeling stuck.  I'll keep it as general as possible.

Could the setup line be shorter? Getting them to the surprise quicker?   Do you tell them more than they need to know to understand your joke? No one has ever said, “Man I wish that comic’s setups were longer.”

Punchlines should also aim for brevity.  The punchline is the moment our expectation gets its surprising fulfillment.  The quicker this happens, the bigger the punch.

  Here's a great example, by Paul F. Tompkins:  

”I love amusement parks…I think because I hate money.”

Quick wind up... and Pow!

He sets up the expectation with one sentence, and then surprises you with one word.  Nice and punchy.

On the other side of the issue, is the language colorful and specific? While brevity is your friend in comedy, bland colorless words are not.  Is “car” the best word for your joke? How bout “rust-bucket” or “82 Fiero?”  It seems contradictory to my last point, but it’s all about balance.  In general, the most vivid picture you can create in the audience’s sense memory, while using the least possible words, is the comedy sweet spot.

Assignment Fifteen

Once the words of a joke are as concise and colorful as you can make them, think for a moment about their content.

Look at the first joke on your list. What is your emotional point of view in this joke?  How do you feel about what you are saying?  Is this point of view clear in the writing?  Is it clear in the way you say it onstage?

  Do you love that “everyone has an Iphone,” or do you hate it?  Can the audience clearly tell? The audience must know this at all times, or they aren’t fully understanding you.  Make sure they can, with the both the writing and your delivery.

Apply these questions to the jokes that work, but don’t over-think it. If nothing obvious jumps out, let’s trust the jokes that worked to work again and not try to fix what isn’t broken. Just do them the way you did last week. If something from the above questions really strikes you, make the change. But don’t be afraid to go back to what worked if the change turned out to be a wrong move.

Assignment Sixteen

For this second week of open mics, make a list.  First do the jokes that did the best.

After that, do whatever unsuccessful joke from last week you feel you have the best shot at repairing. Whatever joke suggests the most obvious fix. Whatever joke you think you might best be able to help with the lessons from the James and Anthony assignments.

Fill up the rest of your set with new jokes. Make sure at least one minute of your set is all new, written this week.

DO NOT THROW THE UNSUCCESSFUL JOKES FROM LAST WEEK AWAY. Make a new file called “In the Shop” or whatever phrase you prefer. No idea is dead. There is always the possibility that you will return to it with a new perspective in the future.  We’re just putting them aside for now.

Go do three open mics.  Go to more if you can, and then turn ahead to Week Three.

I know I just put a lot of work on your desk this week, but I deliberately left the first week light. I didn’t want you to begin with anything guiding you but your natural comedic instincts.

I also didn’t want there to be a bunch of crap in your head that you were trying to remember while also trying to do one of the hardest things in show business. Some of the basics got saved for this week and you got it all in a big dump.  This is elementary stuff that you had to get eventually.  I would start the book with it, but I wanted to wait until you understood what doing stand-up felt like before dropping it on you.

Next week won’t be nearly as heavy in new ideas.  We will mostly elaborate on what we started here. I never want to add new elements beyond your ability to process them. Doing your act as a newcomer to stand-up comedy is hard enough.  If you ever feel like repeating a week, do it.  Move ahead only when you feel like you understand the lessons completely.

It’s Fine Press Friday!

This week we present Sequence, Sometimes Metaphysical, poems by Theodore Roethke; with wood engravings by John Roy. Published in 1963 by Kim Merker’s Stone Wall Press in Iowa City in an edition of 330 copies, the book was printed on a Washington press from hand-set Romanée type and original blocks. The papers are Rives Heavy and Mulberry. Our copy is another gift from our friend Jerry Buff.

Kim Merker (Karl Kimber Merker) founded Stone Wall Press in 1957 while attending the Iowa Writers' Workshop. As a student, Merker had the opportunity to work under celebrated printer and author, Harry Duncan who ran the Cummington Press. Merker’s Stone Wall Press mainly published young American poets. In 1967, Merker founded The Windhover Press at The University of Iowa as a teaching press, where he could teach students bookmaking and publishing. In 1986, Merker established The University of Iowa’s Center for the Book, where students learn book arts practice and technique, as well as the history and culture of books. Kim Merker passed away in April of 2013 at the age of 81.  

The New York Times published a lengthy obituary of Merker, who was known as a "Hand-Press Printer of Poets,” which can be found here.

View more Fine Press Friday posts.

I start watching Stranger Things & now all of sudden I open up an ex portal lmfao. Today I ran into John fucking Roy at Market Basket. Which that part isn't too too crazy. I mean yea, this whole time I thought he still lived in Haverhill but turns out he owns a home not too far from mine. The part that tripped me up was where exactly. We ran into each other the same exact spot Bryan and I did 7 months ago. Which is funny because that's not even where I normally park. Each time I've parked there it was because of how packed MB is.

Aside from running into John Roy, Luis Severino also started using his Instagram again (or at least to what I've noticed). Remember when we went on the hunt to find both Bryan and Luis online? Couldn't find shit then Bryan Beetlejuice'd his way back in our life and thank God for that. Bryan is by far has been the best part of my 2025. Despite the mess we were in the beginning, I feel like we finally found our footing. I'm very grateful for him.