#jj rambles

How it actually makes me feel:

Cafe’s career is a slow but very Much rolling spiral of self destruction, in the way where cafe Must chase after her friend regardless of her abnormally fluctuating health. We already know, and learn more about how closely knitted Cafe is with her friend (who I’ll refer to as Sunday, it’s implied to be Sunday silence), how Cafe who otherwise was isolated found so much joy in having a companion, someone who showed her new and exciting things. Even at her own expense, though not ill intentioned.

If Cafe did not meet Tachyon, I don’t think there would be anyone to stop her from going on that trip to France. Tachyon herself, self destruction in a bottle, is the one to firmly put the brakes on. Although, she tries to simmer her concern by regarding the success and failure possibilities as mere statistics and experimental results. She dragged her feet at the thought of tagging along with them to France, threw in some half hearted jabs (she doesn’t like airplanes!) to show her reluctance and indirect concern, but had been dismissed. It was only at the airport that Tachyon turned to the trainer (specifically the trainer! She knows Cafe can’t be convinced), and set the reality firmly in place: the high risk that she herself was so familiar with testing. To lose her ability to compete as a racer, and endangering her health. And Cafe is Agonized about the lack of support, she is actively bleeding from her hands and toenails as she tries to walk into the plane before locking down. Because this was, internally, the loss of companionship to her. What mattered most to her was the belief in her dream, the fact that her friend exists, and her goal to Solely overtake her. But to lose the people present by her side was subconsciously too much, even as much as she wanted to continue to chase Sunday. Tachyon served as another guiding light, in a way. a more logically structured one, a blinding one, but a guiding one.

And I think this career does a Fascinating thing by turning the fact Tachyon’s an advisor on its head and having her explode in frustration by the Senior Year. She did all the right things as an advisor, and as a friend. She took excellent care to bring her Plan B into fruition, and Cafe had seen beyond to the light she had been chasing over all this time, given up on, and forced to forget about. And she’s pissed. So much to the point where this not only revitalizes Plan A, but it gave her back a purpose in living (to race). Cafe was the one to give her back this purpose, to make her acknowledge her own ambitions and desires despite the supposed limits.

As someone who was once exactly like that the last thing you need is to be told your an evil person for experiencing a mental health emergency.

Like. How can I be emotionally stable after that??? How can I NOT imagine something similar for elucien from Lucien Vanserra????? This is the same man that offered to give Feyre the MOON on a FUCKING STRING

I’m sorry

I’m sorry

I’m fine

Tagssss:@freyawhitexxx1 @lukecastellans-babygirl @nakiaswg

What Slug man’s deal is. What is up with him??? He feels like such an important character but as of now he’s just treated like a normal enemy.

Antoine, Clyde, Jennifer, Auguste, and Argot all having human names implies that Sam knew them before the visitor shenanigans happened, yet they don’t react to seeing him as of now, nor does Sam have any reaction to them.

Furthermore, how the hell was Sam able to tell apart Clyde and Jennifer and recognize Argot??? Was Clyde just particularly fond of guns or pillbugs and thus Sam saw him and was like “Oh my god that’s Clyde.” I don’t think enough people talk about the bug gang period honestly.