#jerma rumble

I AM NOT CRAZY!

...

I am not crazy! I know he swapped those names! I knew it was Jerma, Mr.x. As if I could ever make such a mistake. Never. Never! I just - I just couldn't prove it. He - he covered his tracks,

he got that Glue idiot at the Jerma Wrestling Federation to lie for him.

You think this is something? You think this is bad? This? This CHICANERY?! He's done worse. That Magic?! Are you telling me that a man just happens to clip trough Cyber BBQ Pit Boy like that?

No! He orchestrated it! Jerma! He puked on his mother's bed after eating a whole sleeve of oreos!

And I saved him! And I shouldn't have. I took him into my own Meme House stream! What was I thinking? He'll never change. He'll never change! Ever since he was 55, always the same!

Couldn't keep his hands out of his gamer hole!

But not our Jerma! Couldn't be precious Jerma! Stealing them blind! And he gets to be a Vinechamp!? What a sick joke!

I should've stopped him when I had the chance! And you - you have to stop him-

Note: Joel is in court for jerking off on the freeway and said this completely unpromptly only because Jermo was his lawyer

In Jerma Rumble, “The Egg” is a gag character with all the powers of an egg who gets immediately murdered by being pushed over, and the EMT who mops up the remains gets more time in the ring

In Ward, Egg is a tortured, mutated supervillian who, after being experimented on by a shadowy organization, was turned into a giant, humanoid egg. Every moment is pain due to the shell making up his outer body shattering and healing at the joints as he moves and breathes, the yolk leaking out of those fractures makes it difficult for him to wear clothes or interact with things, and he can’t experience human contact because it would smash him to pieces. And all of this is a side effect of his actual combat-viable superpower, which is to release terrifying fuck-off murderous bird monsters from inside himself, chestburster style. And he is so full of spite and hate as a consequence of what happened to him that it’s less that he’s fighting to keep the terrifying monsters from hatching, so much that he’s waiting for the ideal moment to let them out.