my opinion on jeffmads with any other third is that they are a happily married couple who bully their third for fun.
not in a mean way (it’s MEAN). not in a cruel way (IT’S CRUEL). but in the way where they love him so fucking much they can’t help but weaponize it. he says one thing slightly off-kilter and they descend on him like vultures in matching bathrobes. he tries to express a boundary and they respond with a calendar invite and chamomile tea.
he tries to fight them. like a little guy. like a fool. they’ve already synced his sleep schedule to the moon cycles and deleted all his emotionally compromising drafts off Twitter. he thinks he has agency. he’s wearing one of their sweaters and drinking from a mug that says “our problem now.”
and like. I’m sorry. there are only two men this ever applies to. and both of them think they’re above it. one is all “I’m composed. I’m rational. I have a spine.” sir, they kissed you on the forehead and you SAT DOWN. you let them explain your own emotional repression to you like it was a podcast you asked for.
the other is a human landslide of manic declarations and wet paper emotions. he shows up ranting about betrayal and justice and they hand him a protein bar and tell him he’s brave. he calls it abuse. he’s never missed a Thursday cuddle. he said “I don’t need this” while letting them exfoliate his shoulders and call him “sweetheart” in stereo.
these men are not in a relationship. they are being domestically dominated by a legally married psy-op. jeffmads are not two people. they are a cohesive spiritual entity with matching silk robes and a mutual lust for fixing twinks through enforced intimacy.
the third always thinks he has a choice. he does not.
