#jayin

We have detective x vigilante.

They'd both be such smart asses to each other.

Toad: Wake me up inside!

Boopkins: I CAN'T WAKE UP!

Toad: Wake me up inside!

Bob, covering his ears: SAVE ME!!!!!

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Jayin: What's the most polite way to phrase "You fucked up big time and need to fix this now or else" in a professional email?

Lex: "Hello, I hope this email finds you before I do."

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Black Doom: You're very confident for someone with no plan, and no idea of what's going on, only knowing that several people here want you dead.

Ben: Confidence comes with experience. People always want me dead.

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SMG3: I'm a villain, stop expecting me to be honest with you.

Saiko: You haven't been a villain in years, stop trying to be all evil and mysterious around us. We work together. I watched you spill ketchup all over your overalls.

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Lumi: Ma'am, are you sure this is the right way?

Leto: Certainly! I'm as sure as I am honest!

Stockman: In that case, we're definitely lost.

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Lil Coding: Somewhere out there a tree is currently growing the wood for your coffin.

Lily: Bold of you to assume my body will ever be found.

SMG4: Kids, what the fuck?

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Jerry: How's it feel to be the lamest kids in school?

Lily: Shut up Jerry your mom buys you Megablocks instead of Legos.

Jerry: You fuckin' take that back-

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RSC!Cory: *is sad*

Mandy: Cory? Everything okay? *hugs him*

Lydia: Do I need to kill someone?

Mandy: Lydia, NO-

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Luigi: Please stop suggesting "Stabbing the Problem" as a solution to everything.

Marcy: No.

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Cursor: Oh yeah, I'm sure therapy's gonna be super fucking helpful.

*later*

Cursor: Okay, apparently sarcasm is a defense mechanism.

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Tulip: Technically, we don't even know if it works. But, let's face it. I invented it. So, it works.

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Bob: If you're good at something, never do it for free.

Luigi: But how do I sell anxiety?

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Floyd: I've always been a little anxious.

Floyd: And then I died.

Floyd: Which did not calm me down.

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Ranma: Is there a reason that the bathtub is on fire?

Tulip and Daffy: SCIENCE!

Ranma: Fair enough.

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Karen: How is it that you always manage to somehow stumble your way ass first into success, despite knowing absolutely jack shit about what you’re doing?!

Mario: It's a gift.

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*during the start of Shattered Timelines*

Dark Meta Knight: What the fuck am I looking at?

Effi: The consequences of our actions! And it's only gonna get worse from here.

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Crash: Can you help me with my account?

Lag: Oh no.

Crash: No, no, I promise it's a normal problem this time.

Lag: Okay. Fine. What is it?

Crash: I included a null string terminator as part of my password, and now I can't-

Lag: HOW?!

Crash: They said to use special characters!

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Zack: You are killing my tough guy personality.

GG: Who's a good kitty?

Zack: Meeee :3

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"Abby": I can be your best friend!

Abby: Or your love interest.

Abby: Or the antagonist.

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(During a Mushrooms and Morons session)

Toad: I search the room.

SMG4: Roll for Investigation.

Toad: *gets a Nat 1*

4: You get lost in a corner for about five minutes.

Toad: ...I'm just crying in the corner, then, shouting for the party to save me.

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Elanore: Why would I ever finish a thought when I could start a new more exciting one?

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*they're falling down a shaft and their code powers aren't working, don't question it*

Emulator: How long have we been falling?

Trixie: I don't know. My creator didn't bother to make a watch be able to tell time!

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Mario: We have invented Fire Hockey.

Bowser Jr: It's like normal hockey but the puck is on fire and the edge of the field is defined by a ring of fire.

Mario: Also it's played on concrete and the player wheels are greased by kerosene.

Meggy: Guys, I was gone for two hours!

Jr: It has a death match mode. Two players. First to seven goals wins.

Meggy: Red, BJ, I respect you both, but what the actual hell?!

Mario: Are you too cowardly to play fire hockey?

She tries to solve that problem by teaming up with Lex Luthor, who's scientific expertise would definitely help with something like this (of course he's not doing this for free, but even with her anti-code-being bias Jayin's smart enough to recognize how good a partnership between the CCC and LexCorp would be for both parties so that's not too big a problem). The plan doesn't work, so we functionally just get Metropolis as yet another World in Playdream's storyline, but it does have benefits.

For one, the aforementioned partnership was always meant to be long-term, so the CCC's finally got a foot in the door within the Digital Multiverse community (because there's No Way somebody like Lex hasn't been wheeling and dealing in those circles ever since he first found out about the Digital Multiverse).

For another, the mostly-failed plan involved a piece of Lord Vortech (the villain from Lego Dimensions) that Lex managed to acquire after the battle at Foundation Prime and had been studying and saving for a rainy day, and when the plan went pear-shaped Rhythmi accidentally absorbed the piece and now has Lego-based reality warping abilities on top of the reality warping abilities inherent to Storyweavers that she already had.

Diana: The real secret to immortality? Not dying. You want to be immortal? Okay, easy. Just don't die. That's it. Refuse to die. There you Go.

Bob: "But how?" you may ask. Easy. Just don't do it. Refuse to. Say no thanks.

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Tulip: The hardest thing about realizing you're bi is that no one tells you what to do with the beam attack you have now. Like how do I even use this thing?

Timmy: With a diffusion lens you can cook with it.

Tulip: See where was this advice when I came out?

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Laharl: Literally why can't I have short hair and long hair at the same time?

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Sally: On all levels except physical I am heart shaped.

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Franky: This might be controversial but if I came across a beaker of glowing green liquid I would give it a little taste.

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Saiko: Bath tubs that can't submerge an entire adult body should be illegal.

Tari: Okay I know what you meant but you sound a bit like a murderer.

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Mario, balancing precariously on a power line and messing with the boxes at the top of a telephone pole: Your cable company doesn't want you to know this trick.

Karen: You know what? I don't want to know that trick either.

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Bob: If I die my funeral's gonna be the biggest fucken party and you're all invited.

Boopkins: If?

Clench: Great, the only party I've ever been invited to and he might not even die.

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Mario: After filling the washing machine with hot dogs, I momentarily hesitate before turning the knob to "Delicates."

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Mr. Puzzles: "Obviously, we have a lot of problems we need to address," I say, referring to one specific problem, which I created, alone.

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Valiant: Undefeated in wizard duels thanks to my devastating countermagic where I close the distance and punch them in the chest 14 times while they try to read a paragraph from a book the size of a briefcase. This sorcery shit is easy as hell.

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Effi: Hey, don't cry. Endless possible futures spanning out in front of you like an infinite spiderweb, okay?

Effi: Just realized this is actually quite horrifying and not a comforting thought at all. Sorry.

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SMG3: A customer just came in and ordered a flat white with six shots in it. For clarity that's like. A whole cup of espresso with maybe an inch of milk sitting on top. This mf is trying to meet the Hat Man.

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Irene: I'm a proud owner of an iq of 5 (and a half!)

Jayin, programming the Meme Suppression Bullets: Not for long!

Project Thunder: Intro

The fleet arrives at the edge of the CCC's system, the physical Firewalls and an army of Twilight and various Brobot models before them. The fleet itself is massive, made up of both the airship-based Codeships and a whole bunch of different ships from different media (mostly Nintendo Properties, of course), as well as Fairy World's military led by Jorgen von Strangle (since Fairies are inherently Codeproof), the Admins (including both our main crew and all the SMG Server Admins we haven't been properly introduced to yet), The Firewall Twins and Supervisors, their other Code-level allies, and any character-levels who can fight at that kind of power (with most needing code stabilizer harnesses and others, namely Ecolo, not) and aren't on one of the infiltration teams.

The Jubilation is also revealed to be a massive space station designed to look like a cupcake with a blue base and pink frosting, and also like a Powerup Mushroom thanks to the frosting section's shape and a pair of "eyes" on the front of the base. While it's the largest ship by a lot, easily Death Star sized, it isn't actually built for direct combat. Instead, it's actually a massive mobile hospital, with nearly all the external weapon systems geared towards defense... and also using cake, confetti, and other party-related foods and supplies as ammunition, because along with Phineas and Ferb, Pinkie Pie also had a hand in its creation and decided to include her own brand of Advanced Partylery in the mix. She's also the ship's captain, because why not. Still, while it's Pinkie's ship, it's Kelsie's House. Pinkie and her crew are in charge if keeping the Jubilation safe and functional, while Kelsie is the one in charge of the massive number of doctors, field medics and the like who staff the place, and it's their job to keep the rest of the fleet safe and functioning to the best of their ability.

On the other side we have the mentioned army of mooks, as mentioned, but also every Code-Level Program the CCC has access to shows up when the alert is sounded... except for Comedy and Tragedy, who were tasked by Mr. L with guarding the Purchase Keys in case of a potential rescue attempt, because he is by far the best villain in the AU at understanding when celebrating a victory would be premature.

Anyway, Peach hails Jayin (via Zoom Call because of course) for a shot at actually negotiating for their friends' release (and potentially having the three dangerous criminals she's harboring be transferred to Alliance Custody, but that one's open for discussion, hence why it's a negotiation and not an ultimatum). Jayin, of course, sees absolutely no value in giving the demands of some video game character, especially Princess Peach of all things, and no reason to hand over her intellectual property. She even points out that she can just take legal action against Glitch Productions and the Grid for hacking into her company like this... except Peach corrects her, pointing out that to do that she'd have to explain how it was even possible, and either the world won't believe her and she'll be seen as a nutcase, or they will believe her, the Digital Multiverse will be revealed, and in the process she'll end up airing all her dirty laundry for everyone to see. She can either lose her games (because even if the fleet falls there will still be others who will rise up. It's not a matter of if the CCC loses, it's a matter of when) or lose her reputation (the one thing that matters most to her). There is no version of this where she wins.

-Ash setting Tama up with a provisional trainer license (basically lets her have Pokemon registered to her despite not being ten yet but she can't do Major Official Trainer Activities like gym challenges, contests, Battle Facilities, etc.) because the Pokemon who've been hanging out with her very much want her to be their trainer. Magcargo's kind of the odd one out since he's only been around her for like an hour cumulatively and he kind of got dragged into this without any idea what was happening but he's still interested because she seems nice. There's some concern about Hoopa staying since he has friends in Dahara City in Kalos... until he points out that Hyperspace Hole still exists and he can come and go literally whenever.

Pikachu officially passes on the role of the Pichu Brothers' chaos wrangler to Absol, in a slightly funny moment where he tries to be all serious about it and put his hand on her shoulder all dramatically, ruined by the fact that he's so much shorter than her that he has to balance awkwardly on his tail to even reach her shoulder (and further undercut by the fact that what he actually says is "they're your problem now. good luck". Also, there is of course much gushing over Gardevoir, Guardeon and Dragaurora's evolutions.

-One of the suggestions for Devos's situation is putting Tonio on the throne, which both he and Valiant are adamantly against because favored by the Muses or not a guy who's been a wandering outlaw and proud of it for nearly a decade is not a good choice for ruling a kingdom in turmoil. Plus having a Songbird as a king would just be weird.

-Kelsie gets Vitality set up in the infirmary and assures everyone that she's expected to make a full recovery eventually, though from what she can tell of how the whole healing flame thing is working it'll take anywhere from one month to three for her to wake up. Then when she's alone she calls Director K to let him know that her reports will be less frequent for the foreseeable future since with Vitality out of commission she's the only medic right now.

And of course there's plenty of friends they can call on from all over the 'net and beyond. Thus, the plan goes like this:

During prep we have three teams

Team one will scour the Digital Multiverse in search of an entry point to the Connected Cosmos Company Servers. Overseer and Abyssal will take point on this since Overseer has more knowledge of the modern DM's layout and cultures than just about anyone else and he already has Abyssal's contact info. The Grid will also be heavily involved in this part due to their extensive spy network.

Team two will learn all the ins and outs of Connected Cosmos: The Game so that when things get going the infiltration teams will have as much information as possible. Gamer Girl and the kids will be in charge of this since GG has a big head-start thanks to already playing it on her own time and the kids wanted to help and this was a relatively safe option for those of them who wouldn't have been as much help during the big fight.

Team three will be more general preparations. Getting the Codeship Fleet up and running, finding the cure for the Nintendo Firewall Virus plaguing the stolen Avatars, recruiting allies, coming up with the actual attack plan, etc. This will mainly be in the hands of the Avatars and the Meme Alliance.

Also, they need to transfer the memes refugees in Equestria to a server that can actually support a Meme Cycle as soon as possible, especially the Dead Memes. Discord is keeping them from becoming Corrupted somehow but whatever he's doing isn't sustainable in the long term, especially since it technically counts as actively preventing chaos and is thus taking a toll on him.

In the meantime, Jayin notices Tama is in the game when she's supposed to have been dead for years in-universe, but shrugs it off and figures she can just stick her in Devos as a random NPC, let the fans speculate, then come up with a quest involving her and put it in one of the smaller updates later down the line (it's an MMO, the players'll eat that shit up).

While Jayin's convinced she's already won (since her inability to see most Digital Beings as people means she's only considering Glitch Productions' possible reaction to this) Mr. L has enough experience both as part of Luigi and as the Crew's enemy to know this is far from over, so he slips through one of the leftover cracks between dimensions and makes a deal with someone those Junior Heroes would never expect...

Once things actually kick off, this is the plan:

The fleet, led by Peach and made up of everyone and everything they've got that can withstand Code Space, will battle the CCC's outer defenses (Twilight monsters, Brobots of every type, the CCC's own Code-level beings, and Mr. L's surprise guest who I'll be introducing in an actual ficlet) to keep the heat off of the infiltration teams.

One infiltration team will be all the Avatars/Anchors and their Crews and some other allies (except Doc and his Hamtor army, who have a Codeship and are part of the fleet) will enter Connected Cosmos: The Game courtesy of Timmy making a wish (since they know that FOP Fairy Magic trumps firewalls but Jayin doesn't), cure the stolen Avatars, then take out all the major Bosses in Renata, Harmonia and Sleeping Gaia (because the Twilit Rifts the bosses are connected to are acting as anchors keeping the stolen code attached to CC:TG's developer server) and await extraction.

The other infiltration team consists of Steve, Rob, Welony, Cursor, Samurai Bob, King Mickey, the AVA Squad and Enigmoth (the Paradox Pokemon, a legendary Bug/Dragon type that has Phase Shift, an ability that makes it not exist every other turn) sneak through the firewalls in a Gummi Ship using Enigmoth's Ability while Chroma and Blaze are being distracted by Mira (she's literally running across the physical firewalls to exploit the fact that firewall programs are programmed to destroy potential virus infiltrators at all costs because if you'll recall her base programming is to be annoying as hell and never get caught) so they can get into the maintenance areas of the CCC Servers and find and destroy the Purchase Keys so this can never happen again (Piracy, Bitches!!!)

Then the final steps are to breech the Firewalls entirely (they will, in fact, have several options for doing so) and have their strongest Programs grab the three Servers and the infiltration teams and hightail it out of there.

Jayin won't be able to do shit about it legally, since if she tries to press charges she'll have to explain how the hell it even happened, which will either make her sound nuts, or pull back the veil of secrecy and in the process reveal that she's exactly the kind of person she's been getting portrayed as in SMG4 and the Grid's videos when so far it's been seen by the viewers as part parody of studio execs in general, part Alyssa being understandably bitter about what happened to her. Either way her reputation would take a massive hit, and she would not be willing to do that to herself even if it would make her win overall.

Basically, he's trying to create his own game multiverse, one separate from the Admins' influence, as a way to return to his roots, since the villains' plan in his debut game was to create their own Perfect World...or at least that was what they were told even though the whole thing was actually Count Bleck's "Suicide-by-Apocalypse."

But even with the information and special Dev Tools he got from the Archives, he's ultimately just one little digital man (and two killer robots who know very little about programming). His Vision could take decades to bring to life on his own, assuming he can even get the funds for it. What he needs is a dedicated Development Team.

And wouldn't you know it, there's a game development company who's already In-The-Know about the Digital World right there. He manages to get in touch with Jayin, who initially thinks it's some kind of prank before he proves that he really is who he says he is. His pitch of the game is an MMORPG that takes place in an interconnected Multiverse that's facing...some sort of eldritch cosmic threat (he would have that figured out but I don't). While the starting cluster of universes would likely be their own original creations to give the game time to create its own following and identity, future updates might include crossovers with existing CCC properties (possibly the Living versions if she decides to make a move and exert her authority). It would be her very own real Connected Cosmos, the worlds and their characters fully under her control, and all he asks is to be allowed to live there and operate unimpeded.

She's hooked, but very reasonably points out that even with a full team it'll still take years to make a game on that scale, at which point he reveals the Admin-Level Dev Tools he took. These babies are what's used to turn basic Servers into the various cityscapes, facilities, and other such Program-Level areas that make up the bulk of the Digital Multiverse, and at this point they're so advanced that they'll easily cut the average time and effort needed for human game development in half, maybe even more. All with the possible patents and copyright claims completely up for Jayin to grab for herself, of course.