#jandjsalmon

I made a prior post about my personal experience but apparently not everyone knew it was her because I didn’t name her specifically. Hopefully, this is the last post I’ll ever make about her. A lot of wonderful people reached out with similar experiences or sympathy but I’ve also seen some continue to interact with her or rec her as someone to follow. Now, I’m putting it in the tags. Her name is out there. If I see her on rec lists, at least I know the info is out there that she abused me and others and whoever posted didn’t want to deal with having to deal with her bullshit of her harassing them or they think I’m a liar. I have nothing to lose in this fandom or to gain by outing her. I’m doing it because I don’t want her to be introduced to new waves of authors/readers/people will trust her without protecting themselves or doing something to protect others. Unfortunately, me and the victims I talked to did not feel comfortable sharing how much she hurt us with each other until she’d done a fair amount of damage, and we were all trying to make it work with her until we hit a breaking point.

As a reminder... this is just a potential scenario based on past experience.

If you do become mutuals, and she thinks you have an ounce of fandom fame or MIGHT post things she likes if she bugs you enough, she might make you aesthetics, reblog, comment, buddy up to your friends to get closer to you, find out and exploit your insecurities or mental illness, notably withdraw support to prove a point if you like something she doesn’t or even show love for another person who doesn’t love her, keep records of your convos, show them to other people, vague post about you (sometimes even going so far as to message you without you even asking to make sure you know ‘oh it wasn’t about you’ to rub salt in that wound), let her husband talk shit about and to you even when on good terms with her, and try to get involved in your personal life to be your (only) best friend and support system... only to tell you you are nothing without her, people rely on her for recs and she can turn the tides on fandom favorites, you should not write original works because original romance is “disgusting” YA is “immature” and no one likes your work and your mind is too fucked up to be productive without her. No one will love you or have time for you like her.

She will insist you include scenes even if you don’t want them there, then try to claim she helped write your fic in the comments of it when all she did was tell you to add something you already wrote and deleted back in, though she did comment on the doc and talk through your million ideas and pick her favorite OF YOUR OWN IDEAS and help with grammar. She will also tell you at least one of your fics is disgusting and berate you to the point of not wanting to post it, especially if it shows Betty even slightly interested in someone besides Jughead at some point in her life, claiming “that’s not her!” but OOC or Jughead with past/current partners is no problem... and she will be very apologetic to have to tell you and make you feel bad, but brag in DMs of her friends that she “made you change your mind” and “taught you how to think” if you eventually cave and adjust something. Conversations become drags where you agree with what she says just to avoid confrontations and meltdowns sometimes.

If you talk to her and try to rebuild your friendship or set boundaries, she will either lash out or apologize and be good for a few days until she can find a reason to turn on you again. When you distance yourself for protection or make new friends, she will harass you in DMs asking why you unfollowed (even if it’s a tumblr glitch) or followed so and so, why you did or didn’t like something, tell you how awful everyone except her is, and try to get you to talk shit about your own friends when you know she’s talking shit about you, too.

Oh and if you compliment her on something you’re considered good at that she’s insecure about (prompted or unprompted), be prepared to be called a fake liar and a judgmental bitch in general for having an opinion -- yes, even if it’s positive, so imagine how fun it was to disagree on something neither of us even made.

She is not a neutral party when it comes to abuse and harassments either. Despite being very anti-cheating, she stoutly defends the Sprouse brothers despite multiple women and outlets coming forward claiming they cheated on or abused their partners, claiming the sources are “crazy” or “jealous” or “unprofessional.” I have some pretty ironic in retrospect screenshots someone sent me of some of her rants but I won’t post them publicly here. What Jandy told me of her former victims was that they blocked her for no reason. She was nothing but supportive of them and they got too big for their britches and had other friends and abandoned her. I’m sure she says similar if not worse things about me for calling her out and cutting her off.

So yeah, it will be uncomfortable to unfollow, ghost, and/or block her. It might even be inconvenient because of the service she provides to this fandom. But please keep in mind that even the slight fear/dread of her shadow-banning or harassing you is a sign that she’s affected you, too.

When Rogue was a kid—let’s say eight-ish—she and her guardians/parents took a trip down to New Orleans. While they stay mostly in the tourist areas, it’s still full of bright colors and lots of activity. Young Anna is excited about all the new sights and experiences. She’s curious and wants to explore. For the most part she’s pretty good at staying with her guardians, but at some point, she gets separated from them and lost in the crowds. Little Anna puts on a brave front and tries to find them. But, after a while she is tired and hungry—and a little scared (not that she’ll admit that). She’s fighting back tears when she meets him.

Meanwhile, Remy, a couple years older than Anna, is working the streets. He’s picking pockets and running scams and whatever else he needs to do to survive. Immediately, he recognizes that she’s a tourist and that she’s lost. Of course, Remy decides that he must help the young damsel in distress. It takes a little bit of wheedling and convincing to get Anna to trust him (after all, he is a stranger and Momma said don’t talk to strangers). But, Remy is Remy and he’s able to charm her and make her laugh. He shares his meager food with her. While he helps her look for her guardians, he shows her all the interesting places that a street scamp like him would know. They have a lovely time together. Anna has made a new friend and Remy actually feels like a kid for a bit.

As it reaches twilight, Remy is finally able to help her locate her guardians. In the back of his mind, he’s wondering what kind of reward he can get from helping Anna. Before they arrive, Anna tells Remy that he’s her ‘best friend’ in that way kids have at making instant friends. There is such a guileless innocence about her that Remy can’t take advantage of their fledgling friendship. Once he’s certain her guardians have noticed her and she isn’t looking at him, Remy slips away, leaving a playing card as the only sign he’d ever been there. As time passes, Anna grows up and her memories of the trip to New Orleans fades. She begins to doubt the reality of the red eyed boy who befriended her. After all, she was the only one to see him. Maybe he was one of the ghosts for which New Orleans is famous.