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something sweet, a peach tree (mark/jaehyun)

Mark begins the summer after his junior year with an unpaid internship and no other plans. But when he agrees to go pick his baby niece up from her music lessons, her teacher, Jeong Jaehyun, catches his eye. Too bad he’s off limits, and not just because Mark’s niece is involved. Jaehyun is 41 to Mark’s 20.

To sate his curiosity about older men, Mark decides to look into becoming a sugar baby. He could use the money, after all. And he seems to find a willing patron right away. But for the first time in Mark’s like, he finds he might be in over his head.

Chapter 7 | prev next mlist

Characters: Mark, Jaehyun, other members of nct throughout

Genre: romance, angst, smut, age gap, sugar daddy!au

Pairing: Mark/Jaehyun

Warnings: AGE GAP (older jaehyun, younger mark), semi-public sex/voyeurism

Rating: Explicit

Length: 7.9k

James schedules his trip with Annie as planned, so from Saturday morning to Sunday evening, Mark will have his hands full looking after Lucy. Jaehyun offers to pick some dinner up for them and then come get him from work on Friday so they can have a nice night in together, which Mark happily accepts.

He’s staunchly repressing the weird feelings from last week, but unfortunately they don’t just go nowhere. The, uh, other feelings he’s had for Jaehyun since the beginning remain, and compound now with everything else channeling into one avenue. He’s been, like, obnoxiously horny for the better part of this week, maybe also because he and Jaehyun only fucked once, that Saturday afternoon, last weekend. Anyway, he’s very glad Jaehyun suggested this, because he doesn’t want to deal with that when he’s supposed to be babysitting his niece.

So he already has a plan when he gets into Jaehyun’s car that afternoon. And it helps that Jaehyun’s in a plain white tank top and soft shorts that ride up his thighs. How could Mark be expected to resist?

He waits until they’re a respectable distance away from his office building. He slips his hand over the console to rest innocently on Jaehyun’s exposed thigh. If Jaehyun suspects anything, he doesn’t react. It’s only when Mark’s fingers inch closer and closer to where Jaehyun’s cock is lying soft under the fabric of his shorts that Jaehyun raises an eyebrow at him and asks, calmly, “Can I help you?”

Mark glances at him. “Just missed you, that’s all. Been missing you all week,” he says. “I can stop if you want.”

Jaehyun presses his lips together, clearly trying and failing to hide his amusement. “I didn’t say that.”

Mark wraps his hand around Jaehyun’s cock and squeezes. Jaehyun inhales sharply but doesn’t even blink. “Good.” He begins to stroke, slow so the fabric doesn’t chafe. “Just keep driving, hyung. I’ll take care of you. See if you can make it home.”

“Fuck, Mark,” Jaehyun mutters, but he keeps his eyes on the road.

It takes a few blocks before Mark feels a wet patch of precome leak through the fabric under his fingers. “You’re making such a mess, hyung,” he teases, but Jaehyun just makes a soft noise and bucks his hips up into Mark’s palm. “Do you want it faster?”

“Mm-hm,” Jaehyun hums tightly. Mark smirks to himself, even though he’s getting hard, too, just watching Jaehyun.

“I dunno if you can make it home,” he says, speeding up his hand anyway. “I know you, you don’t come unless you’re with me, so you’re all pent up, right?” Jaehyun's silence is answer enough. “You’re already so hard.” And he is, hard and hot, the heat of it obvious even through his shorts.

They’re out of the city now, heading up a hill towards Jaehyun’s neighborhood. Mark keeps stroking, even when Jaehyun’s hands start to tremble at the wheel. There’s less danger of them crashing here, which Mark is vaguely anxious about somewhere in the back of his brain. If they need to stop, they can just stop. They’re the only people on the road now that they’re out of the downtown traffic.

“Close, baby, ‘m close,” Jaehyun warns softly.

“We’re only a couple blocks away,” Mark teases, but he’s now made it his mission to make Jaehyun come in his pants. He leans closer, pressing his lips to Jaehyun’s bare shoulder. Jaehyun shivers. “So pretty, hyung. It’s almost worse if you come now than when we were in traffic downtown. What if one of your neighbors sees?” The streets are empty and quiet, but Mark watches the idea bloom in Jaehyun’s mind and send shivers down his back.

“Fuck,” Jaehyun grits out, slowing for a stop sign. Mark can tell he kind of wants to just blast right through it, but Jaehyun is responsible, so he stops. And he doesn’t go. His grip on the wheel tightens. He bends over himself, panting, forehead grazing the top of the steering wheel, abdomen working helplessly, and then he comes with a broken cry, spilling hot release in his pants.

Mark strokes him through it, humming encouragement, until he’s empty. Some of the come has leaked through the fabric; Mark brings his hand to his mouth to clean it off.

“Jesus Christ,” Jaehyun mutters, finally easing his foot off the brake.

“Almost!” Mark says cheerfully.

“You’re literally evil,” Jaehyun replies, voice hoarse.

“What, you’re saying you didn’t like it?” Mark asks, only a little worried that he really didn’t.

Jaehyun gives him an exasperated look, but there’s a fondness underneath it that he can’t mask. “I’m not saying that,” he grumbles as he pulls into his driveway, and Mark laughs.

Jaehyun leaves Mark to set up their dinner out on the patio while he goes to find a change of clothes. It does amuse Mark endlessly, but it hasn’t done anything to ease his own troubles. Even though it takes a good few minutes for Jaehyun to join him, Mark’s slacks still feel tight by the time he sits down at the table. Hopefully, his behavior will earn him some form of retaliation after they’re done eating.

But Jaehyun returns to the patio calm and poised, and they have a completely respectable dinner. They take a dip in the pool after, but Jaehyun keeps himself politely out of Mark’s reach. Confused now and a little intrigued, Mark lets him play his game, wondering what his end goal is.

“You know,” Jaehyun says, as he pulls himself up out of the water. “I still haven’t seen your place. Still think the doorman is spying for your brother?”

“Oh,” Mark says, a little startled. He supposes now is as good a time as any—it’ll be far less suspicious for Jaehyun to stay for an hour or two than overnight, and normally they wouldn’t want to waste the time. But since Jaehyun has to take Mark back tonight anyway, it’s more worth it. And the summer’s going to be over soon, and Mark can’t bring Jaehyun back when his friends move in. He thinks about his apartment, the places he could fuck Jaehyun. In front of the windows, if they kept the lights off. It would be better than Jaehyun’s car or backyard. Right up against the door, where anyone walking by would hear them. In Mark’s bed, where he came thinking of Jaehyun just the night before. “It’s, um, it’s a little messy,” he warns, which is true.

“We don’t have to,” Jaehyun says. He’s honest; there’s a touch of uncertainty under his tone that Mark takes to mean he’s afraid of making Mark uncomfortable. It’s sweet. “I just… wanted to see. More of you.”

Mark smiles, feeling pleased and a little shy. “Okay,” he agrees, clambering out of the pool and accepting the towel Jaehyun offers him.

They get dried off. Jaehyun lets the dogs out while Mark sneaks upstairs to steal some comfy clothes for the car ride home, then returns to the kitchen to clean up their dishes and file them neatly into the dishwasher. Their forks go in the second-to-back section of the utensil organizer. Mark knows Jaehyun’s system better than his own.

“Those my sweats?” Jaehyun asks when he joins Mark in the entryway.

“Mm,” Mark confirms without raising his head, intent on lacing his shoes. “Didn’t feel like putting my work pants back on.”

“Just checking,” Jaehyun replies, the smile clear in his voice even though Mark can’t see it. “Ready?”

“Yeah.” Mark follows Jaehyun out the garage door.

It’s early, still, the sun not even dipping low enough to cast a golden shine over the street. It’s thinking about setting, though; the days are getting shorter, and Mark knows that soon the world will be night-dark at this time. But for now, the light is bright and clear and catches in Jaehyun’s hair. Mark watches him as he drives, wondering when he’ll start to grey. He wants to see it. He thinks he’d like it.

Jaehyun doesn’t touch him. Mark half-expected him to; maybe it was wishful, horny thinking. Jaehyun has a lot more restraint than Mark does, and he’s more creative in his patience. Simple retaliation isn’t really his style. Mark should’ve known that, but he still feels disappointed and, as a result, hopelessly turned on as they accelerate on the expressway.

The sun glitters over the lake, sparkling off buildings. Little boats dot the water; Mark thinks he spots a long, skinny rowing shell on the far side near the shore, trailing a little coach’s launch. Wakes from the bigger pleasure yachts streak white on blue.

“Summer’s almost gone,” he says quietly.

“School soon,” Jaehyun agrees. “Think you’re ready?”

For school? Certainly. For everything else? Mark looks at Jaehyun out of the corner of his eye. He hasn’t said anything to make Mark think he’ll be done with him once classes start up, but they both know it’ll be different. “Kinda,” Mark says. “It’s my last year, and then… I dunno.”

“You have a while to think about it,” Jaehyun says sympathetically.

Mark doesn’t want to think about it. He wants to fuck Jaehyun ‘til they’re both sore and aching and boneless in their exhaustion and Mark doesn’t have the energy to even imagine tomorrow, or the next hour, let alone next year. If he doesn’t think about it, maybe it won’t come. It’s not an elegant solution, but it is a satisfying one. For now.

“Mm,” he says instead.

“Graduating can be scary.” Jaehyun’s tone is still sweet, placating. “I was scared.”

“I’m not,” Mark says. “I’m not scared of graduating. I just don’t like the not knowing. It’s like when I was waiting for my college decisions. I knew I’d get in somewhere. But I didn’t know where. It didn’t scare me. It just sat under my skin, like, I dunno. An itch I couldn’t reach.”

“Well, don’t rush into the future too fast,” Jaehyun says. He turns onto Mark’s street. “You’ll miss this time before you know it.”

I’m missing it already, Mark thinks. That’s the problem. He’s gearing up to say goodbye, and he almost wishes it was already all over, so he could grieve it in peace, with undivided attention.

Jaehyun pulls into a guest parking spot. Mark gathers his things. They head into the lobby. No one bats an eye.

“You said your friend’s parents own the building?” Jaehyun asks.

“Yeah, no way I’d afford it otherwise,” Mark replies. “A studio in the city with a nice view? Forget student loans, I’d be in debt to management well into my next life.”

Jaehyun laughs. “Could get yourself a real sugar daddy to pay it off.”

“Shut up,” Mark mutters, his skin hot.

He unlocks his apartment, letting Jaehyun in and re-locking it behind them. Jaehyun politely ignores the pile of laundry on one chair and the crumbs on the counter, instead strolling over to the windows to admire the view. “Beautiful windows. You can see the Space Needle!”

“Can fuck you up against them later, when it gets dark,” Mark offers, grinning when Jaehyun flashes him a mildly scandalized look. “What?”

“Is that what you think about when you look out them?”

“Lately, yeah,” Mark says with an offensively casual shrug, tossing his slacks onto the laundry chair. “Bed?”

“Not gonna give me a tour?” Jaehyun asks, a sort of glint in his eye that tells Mark his retaliation has finally come.

“You’re standing in the foyer, kitchen, living room, and laundry all at once,” Mark says drily. “Bathroom is behind that door and my bed is in the corner with a curtain over the opening, which is the only reason this isn’t also the bedroom. C’mon, hyung, we both know you didn’t come here just to see how I live.”

“But I do want to see.” Jaehyun flops down on the couch, still looking around.

“I’m drawing the shades, then,” Mark says, moving to the windows. “Sun’s about to get real annoying, anyway. We can open them back up again when it’s setting.”

Jaehyun doesn’t protest, just watches Mark turn on his strip of neon lights and tug the blackout curtains closed. The room turns deep blue with the sun gone, light enough still to see, but dark enough that Mark has to blink a couple times to get his eyes to adjust.

He grabs a pillow off the couch, throwing it on the floor between Jaehyun’s feet, and goes to pull his own pants off.

“No,” Jaehyun says, “leave them on. I don’t want to be the only one who comes in his pants.”

“These are your pants,” Mark points out.

“Mm,” Jaehyun hums, watching him get on his knees anyway. “So I’ll think of you when I wear them.”

“Oh.” Mark’s whole body feels weak suddenly. He runs his hands up Jaehyun’s bare thighs, slipping them under his shorts till he hits his underwear. He kisses his left kneecap. “Okay.”

He finally reaches up and tugs Jaehyun’s pants and underwear down. Jaehyun doesn’t help him, doesn’t touch him, just watches placidly while Mark frees his cock from the fabric and scoots as close as he can, tops of his thighs brushing the bottom of the couch. Mark blinks up at him, maybe for show, maybe to spur him into some kind of action, but Jaehyun is a wall. Before it can turn into a staring contest that Mark will surely lose, he dips his head and wraps his lips around the tip of Jaehyun’s cock.

Jaehyun starts soft, but hardens quickly under Mark’s touch. It’s enough gratification for a little drop of smugness to settle in with Mark’s growing desperation. Because Mark is hard, has been half-hard basically since they first pulled into Jaehyun’s garage. He takes Jaehyun down to the base until he’s choking, and pulls off wetly. Jaehyun’s hips twitch, but his hands remain impassively at his sides. Mark whimpers softly, pressing his tongue to Jaehyun’s slit, licking up the beading precome, hoping to elicit some reaction for all his hard work. Jaehyun lifts his hand to Mark’s hair, but he doesn’t pull. His touch is featherlight, combing through, carefully and slowly working the tangles loose, letting the minutes pass.

But it’s something. Mark bobs his head enthusiastically, humming when Jaehyun gives the tiniest thrust up to meet him. Mark presses his nose to Jaehyun’s pubic bone, breathes in deep. Maybe it’s gross, but he likes the musky, heady scent there, a familiar comfort. He can barely feel the press of Jaehyun’s cock on the back of his throat, or maybe he can feel it but it just doesn’t matter. He swallows around it once, twice, breathes out. A shudder passes through Jaehyun’s body; Mark readjusts his grip on his thighs as pulls off slowly, then pushes back down, keeping his cheeks hollowed. He does it again, and again, keeping his pace even, not fast, but not slow, either. Jaehyun trembles, huffing out tiny moans that make Mark’s head swim. He’s throbbing in his pants, but he can’t get a hand down to reach himself, and he has a feeling Jaehyun doesn’t want him to, anyway.

“Mark,” Jaehyun whispers, and goes still. Come hits the roof of Mark’s mouth, and Mark realizes, as he lets out a long, trembling breath, that there are tears stinging in his eyes.

Mark swallows all of it down, only pulling off once Jaehyun starts to go soft again in his mouth. He pushes Jaehyun’s tank up to kiss his stomach, tucks him back into his pants, then gets onto unsteady feet.

“Think the sun’s past the horizon now?” he asks hoarsely, keeping his tone casual.

“One way to find out,” Jaehyun replies, equally casual, pushing himself off the couch.

Mark goes to the kitchen to fill up two glasses of water for them, leaving Jaehyun to pull the shades back. The sun is, in fact, below the horizon now, and it’s painted the whole city a brilliant orange. It washes over the vinyl flooring, turning gray to gold. Jaehyun pads over from the far wall, quiet.

Mark passes one of the waters to him when he’s close enough, taking a sip of the other one. Jaehyun sidles up next to him, facing away from the windows, leaning back against the counter. The dying light shines golden around his silhouette like a full-body halo. He reaches out with his free hand, gets a grip of Mark’s hip and pulls him close.

Mark grins and kisses him. He hears the clink of the water glass against the counter, and then feels Jaehyun’s other hand on his jaw, his cheek. The hand on his hip shifts center, and lower. Jaehyun cups his cock and gives it a soft squeeze. Mark stutters a moan into his mouth, quiet and whispery. The counter is high enough that no one could see exactly where Jaehyun’s hand is, but one look at their position and the salacious pinch of Mark’s brow would say enough. Then again, no one’s really looking. The next building is far enough away that it doesn’t matter.

“No underwear?” Jaehyun asks.

“Accidentally took them off with my slacks,” Mark explains impatiently. “Too lazy to put them back on.” He kisses Jaehyun again, really kisses him, pushes his tongue in so he can run it over Jaehyun’s teeth, the points of his canines.

Jaehyun lets him lick into his mouth, breathing out soft moans of encouragement, but he makes Mark chase his hand instead of just giving him what he wants.

“Hyung,” Mark mumbles against Jaehyun’s lips, rolling his hips forward into his palm. “More.”

Jaehyun, infuriatingly, keeps his touch light. “Could’ve made me crash today,” he says.

“You would’ve stopped me, before,” Mark replies through gritted teeth. It feels so, so good, to finally have Jaehyun’s hands on him, but it’s not enough. He thinks he might cry, rocking his hips forward even though Jaehyun just follows the movement. He knocks his forehead against Jaehyun’s shoulder and lets Jaehyun pet soothing circles into his spine.

“It’s too bad we can’t actually do something like that, like really in public,” Jaehyun muses. “Too risky. But it’s fun to think about, isn’t it?”

Mark can only groan. He imagines them out at dinner, dressed up so fancy, Mark’s hands in Jaehyun’s lap as they eat. Jaehyun frozen with his fork and knife still in his white-knuckled hands as he comes in his expensive dress pants. The unmistakable stain when he stands.

Jaehyun takes a firmer grip of Mark through his (Jaehyun’s) sweats. Mark keens softly, letting his mouth drop open and his teeth scrape harmlessly against Jaehyun’s skin, right next to the fabric of his tank top. Mark realizes suddenly that he’s still holding his water, as a drop sloshes over the rim and hits his thumb, but he can’t bring his arm down, can’t move at all, can only rut hopelessly into Jaehyun’s hand.

“What’re you thinking about, baby boy?” Jaehyun’s voice is pitched low, the rumble echoing in Mark’s ears.

“Would make you come at dinner with my hands,” Mark pants out. He raises his head, hooks his chin over Jaehyun’s shoulder and stares out the window. He can just make out people moving around in the building across the street. Someone is cooking. A few floors down, people jog on treadmills. And in Mark’s kitchen, in the apartment gifted to him by his friend’s parents, Mark humps an older man’s palm like a desperate teenager.

“And then?” Jaehyun prompts, and Mark remembers dizzily that he was in the middle of a fantasy.

“When we got up to leave, everyone could see the mess you made,” Mark continues. “And they would be able to see how hard I was, too. No hiding it. Oh, fuck.” Jaehyun wraps his hand around Mark, and even through the fabric Mark can feel the press of his fingertips, can feel Jaehyun’s thumb against his slit. “And then I’d fuck you on the hood of your car, or maybe up against the side, in the parking lot.” He can see it, Jaehyun’s fingers sliding against the roof as Mark fucks into him, the car rocking gently with the force of it. Jaehyun weak-kneed and teary; they wouldn’t have time for a lot of prep. Mark pounding into him as people walked by, uncaring. Jaehyun, dripping with Mark’s come, covered in his own, driving them home. Or maybe they were out to lunch, and Jaehyun drives Mark back to school for his afternoon classes. He imagines waving bye through the passenger window, walking into class with his limbs still orgasm-loose.

“You wanna fuck me where everyone can see?” Jaehyun presses.

“Yeah,” Mark slurs. “Want people to see what I can do. How I make you feel. How I’d only do it for you.”

“I want it, too,” Jaehyun murmurs. “Gonna come?”

“Uh-huh.” He slumps against Jaehyun, his free hand clutching at the back of Jaehyun’s neck to help hold himself up, shaking. He presses a hot, open-mouthed kiss to the top of Jaehyun’s shoulder as his hips thrust up into Jaehyun’s fist, the fabric of his sweats scratching and pulling with every movement. He locks onto a guy pacing in front of his window across the way, looking over the city with his phone to his ear. He doesn’t see Mark, but Mark pretends he does, pretends he sees him draped over Jaehyun, eyes hazy, hips working behind the counter, Jaehyun’s arm moving in tandem.

He comes so hard he can barely hear himself moaning, his fingers digging into Jaehyun’s neck. “Hyung, fuck, fuck, fuck, Jaehyun.” It spills out without Mark meaning for it to. His come is hot and sticky, trapped against his cock with nowhere to go. He feels himself sliding around against the fabric, which sends another crazy jolt of pleasure through his whole body. “Oh, god,” he says weakly, hips twitching erratically. Jaehyun releases him and he bends over the sink, finally setting his water glass down with an unsteady hand. He blows out a hot breath; it fogs on the stainless steel.

Jaehyun’s voice bleeds amusement when he asks, “Still wanna fuck me against the windows after the sun goes down?”

“Yes,” Mark spits out immediately. “Fuck, hyung, I didn’t even really think I was an exhibitionist before I met you.”

Jaehyun does laugh now, running a hand down Mark’s back. “Sometimes it depends on the partner,” he says. “Maybe you’ve never had anyone you wanted to show off before me.”

His tone is playful, but it rings true. Mark wants to claim Jaehyun in front of everyone, wants him to be his and his only, forever, wants the whole world to know. “Yeah, maybe,” he huffs quietly, standing up. “I’m gonna rinse off before these stick to me.”

When he comes out of the bathroom, shirtless, with a towel wrapped around his waist, Jaehyun is back on the couch watching the sunset. Mark goes to turn off the lights, plunging them into near-darkness, then joins him wordlessly, curling into his side.

“Your internship ends next week, right?” Jaehyun says. “And school isn’t for another week after that?” Mark nods. “Y’know how we were talking about the peninsula? What if we spent the week out there?”

Mark sits up. “Really?”

“Yeah,” Jaehyun says, like it’s no big deal. “I mean, I might’ve already booked the cabin. Sunday to Friday. It’s okay if you can’t make it, but—”

Mark kisses him, pins him against the couch and kisses him, smiling big against his lips. “Yes,” he says when he pulls away. “Let’s go.”

“You sure? You don’t have plans with your friends?” Jaehyun asks.

“Nah, they’re not coming in until the weekend anyway. I can just move next weekend,” Mark says. “And it’ll be nice. To spend the time with you, before I get super busy.”

“If you,” Jaehyun ventures slowly. “You know. If you’ll be too busy with school, that’s okay. I know neither of us really planned for this, so…”

Mark shakes his head. “Shut up,” he says. “I still wanna see you.”

“Okay.” Jaehyun still sounds uncertain, his eyes unreadable in the dying light. “Just, with all your classmates coming back and stuff, I thought maybe… I mean, if there’s someone…”

“There’s no one I want more than you,” Mark says. He’s almost angry at him. Does Jaehyun think Mark could give him up that easily? Would it be easy for Jaehyun? He tries to make light of it, swallowing the weird tension before he can ruin such a nice night. “Besides, Princess and Bobby would miss me.”

Jaehyun’s lips quirk up at the corners. “Alright,” he says. “Just making sure.”

“You’re stupid,” Mark says plainly, leaning in to kiss him again. Jaehyun’s laughter rumbles in his chest; he catches one of Mark’s wrists in his hand and holds it between their bodies, trapping Mark at his side. Mark kisses him fervently, half climbing into his lap. The towel loosens and pools over his thighs, but it doesn’t matter because the sun has sunk so far below the horizon it’s practically gone, leaving the sky with only a faint orange tinge. Mark likes this, too—being naked when Jaehyun is still fully clothed. He rubs himself against Jaehyun’s stomach, the head of his cock bumping their hands.

“You’re insatiable,” Jaehyun accuses softly. There’s no real accusation to it.

“You’re the one who’s gonna be coming for the third time this evening in just a little bit here,” Mark points out.

“Yeah, and whose idea is that?” Jaehyun releases his wrist in favor of grabbing his hip. He pinches him lightly; it doesn’t hurt, but Mark yelps all the same. Even in the darkness, Mark can see every careful line of Jaehyun’s smile. His heart hammers in his chest.

“You’re pretty, hyung,” he says breathlessly, and Jaehyun rolls his eyes, tugging Mark into him, arms wrapped around his body.

“You gotta stop calling me that. It isn’t true.” Mark can picture the pink of the blush that he’s sure has risen to his cheeks. It’s not doing much for Jaehyun’s argument.

“I’d never lie to you,” he says, earning himself a bone-crushing squeeze. He presses a noisy, tickle-y kiss to Jaehyun’s neck, then twists himself free so he can look out the windows.

The orange has faded from the sky. The stars are coming out and the moon hangs over the sliver of lake that Mark can see, its reflection rippling in the wake of the party boats.

“Think it’s dark enough?” Jaehyun asks.

“Let’s close the curtains a little bit,” Mark says. “Less light from the city. Then all people will see are two silhouettes. They’ll look away pretty quick, and even if they don’t, it’s not like they’ll see our faces.”

They pick the corner the half-faces the water, closing the curtains on the windows that face the other building and the rest of the street. Mark ducks into his room for lube. Jaehyun steps out of his shorts, tossing them over to the couch, and Mark returns to tug his shirt up over his head for him. Jaehyun splays a hand over Mark’s stomach, and it strikes Mark then the comfort he has here. He’s not extremely shy about his body, but he never feels comfortable just walking around topless, or pulling his shirt off when it’s hot out like so many of his friends seem perfectly content to do. It’s not that he’s insecure about how he looks, it’s just a general sort of embarrassment at nudity. But not with Jaehyun. He wants Jaehyun to look, likes it when he touches him, skin against skin. It’s not even really in a sexual way—well, not entirely, anyway.

Jaehyun leans in and kisses him. Mark throws his arms over Jaehyun’s shoulders and kisses back, pressing their bodies together. Jaehyun’s just a little bit taller than him, so his cock slides against Mark’s stomach while Mark’s brushes Jaehyun’s inner thigh. They’re both half-hard again, but neither of them move to do anything about it. They just kiss, body to body, soft skin against soft skin. Mark wants to touch Jaehyun everywhere. He wants to push his fingers against Jaehyun’s soft palate and run his thumbs over his teeth, he wants to open a seam in his belly and crawl inside—

And it sounds insane, but all of this is insane. He’s fucking his niece’s fucking music teacher, who’s just about double his age, who—oh, Christ, who Mark actually really cares about, like maybe way too much. Who most certainly doesn’t feel the same way back.

Mark bites Jaehyun’s lip, too hard. Maybe because he’s angry. Maybe because his heart hurts. Maybe because he wants Jaehyun to be his and this is the only way he can say it. With blood in his mouth.

Jaehyun, perfect Jaehyun, doesn’t protest or push away. Jaehyun moans.

It makes Mark weak; he moans back, sweet and soft and low, swiping his tongue over the swollen lump he’s just made. “Sorry,” he mutters.

Jaehyun just kisses him again. “It’s okay,” he says. “You like it when I cry.” Another kiss. “How do you want me?”

“Facing the window,” Mark says, trying not to say something else, something stupider.

Jaehyun presses himself to the glass, head turned so he can still see what Mark is doing. Mark pumps some lube onto his palm and then tosses the bottle aside, taking a small dollop of it onto his index finger and spreading it down to the last knuckle. Jaehyun sticks his ass out a little to make things easier, and Mark groans softly.

“You look so slutty,” he comments.

Jaehyun tries to look put out, Mark thinks, but it’s not really working because his eyes are dark and unfocused. As much as this was Mark’s idea, he can tell Jaehyun is enjoying it a lot. He grins to himself, pressing the finger against Jaehyun’s perineum, then pushing inside.

Jaehyun’s eyes flutter closed; he clenches around Mark, tight and hot. “Jesus,” Mark mumbles, working his finger in to the base and giving Jaehyun a second to adjust before slowly pulling it back out again. “Wish you could see yourself. But that’s part of it, I guess. Everyone can see you but you."

Jaehyun gasps quietly, but he rocks his hips back to meet Mark’s fingers. It softens something in Mark. For you, Jaehyun is saying. He wouldn’t want this with anybody else. Mark wouldn’t, either, he thinks.

He opens Jaehyun up pretty quick after that, too eager to get to the fucking to really drag it out. Besides, he’s tortured Jaehyun enough for one day with his antics in the car. Soon, he’s fumbling for the lube again to slick up his cock while Jaehyun catches his breath, fogging the window next to his mouth.

Mark pushes into him, gripping his hips with lube-wet hands, but it doesn’t matter. Jaehyun makes fists against the glass, his cock dripping between his legs. Mark slips in deeper and leans forward to rest his forehead on Jaehyun’s spine. “Hyung,” he manages. “God, still so tight. Is it ‘cause you’re nervous?”

“Maybe a little,” Jaehyun says. “Mostly turned on, though.”

“Good,” Mark says. He bottoms out, waits a beat, draws his hips back. Jaehyun is hot and wet around him, soft walls hugging his cock and making pleasure pool in Mark’s belly. He thrusts in, jostling Jaehyun against the window. In the streets below, bar-goers mill about, waiting at stoplights, watching the moon over the water. Any of them could look up and see two bodies pressed to the glass, body heat making it steam up a little and blocking the view. Mark’s next thrust is so hard it’s almost mean. He can hear Jaehyun’s teeth clack against each other, and does it again.

“Baby,” Jaehyun says, his breath coming in hiccups. Mark hums, kissing his vertebrae. He moves a hand around Jaehyun’s hips to jerk him off, and Jaehyun convulses beneath him. He’s trying and failing to find some purchase on the smooth face of the window. His scrabbling makes something dark and jealous in Mark’s heart bare its teeth.

“So good, hyung,” he says against his skin. “Anyone who looks should thank you. You’re like a fuckin’ wet dream, you know that?” Jaehyun makes a noise of protest, but it turns into a moan when Mark angles his hips just right. “Fuck, yeah, right there?” He hits it again, and Jaehyun is nodding—Mark can’t see it, but he can feel it, the fervent bobbing of his head, the silent yesyesyes.

The world sort of stills around him. Or maybe Mark’s mind just slows down. He listens to their bodies moving against each other, and the rapid beating of Jaehyun’s heart. He shifts his other hand up to the glass, crowding Jaehyun impossibly closer until he’s completely trapped, just enough room between his body and the window for Mark’s fist, still stroking him in time with his thrusts. Mark pants openmouthed, the hot breath fanning back onto his cheeks after it hits Jaehyun’s skin. Pleasure sparks down his legs, making his knees shake, but he doesn’t stop. Jaehyun is making noises that make part of Mark want to snap him in half and another part to wrap Jaehyun up in, like, fucking bubble wrap or something, Mark doesn’t know, all he knows is everything feels good, even the way his knuckles bump against the glass, even the way his thighs are getting sore, and–

“Mark, Mark, gonna come,” Jaehyun warns, and Mark makes some kind of low, insane noise in his chest and speeds up. Jaehyun squeaks out something that sounds like oh, fuck, and then he’s shooting come over Mark’s fingers and painting the glass with it. Mark lifts his head, craning his neck so he can see around Jaehyun’s body, can see his come dripping down toward the floor in a porn-perfect splatter.

It overwhelms him, and he can’t even say anything before he’s coming, too, still thrusting unevenly into Jaehyun’s body. His come mixes with the lube, squelching a little, but even that is hot to Mark. He can’t help the way his hips give little phantom twitches even after he tries to stop, still chasing the high as they both come down.

They stay like that, slumped against the window, Jaehyun’s release the crowning piece of evidence in their fucked up little crime scene. Mark knows it’s almost worse if people see them now, but he still doesn’t care. He’s bone-tired and deeply satisfied with himself. He doesn’t even move when, after he pulls out, he hears his own release dripping out of Jaehyun and hitting his floors.

It’s Jaehyun who finally peels them off the windows. Jaehyun who cleans up the come dripping down the glass, the spatters on the floor. Jaehyun who gets them in the shower, just enough to get the gross stuff off. Jaehyun who guides Mark to bed and tucks him in. He sits on the edge of the mattress, stroking Mark’s hair while Mark battles sleep.

“I’ll see you next Thursday at pickup,” Mark mumbles. “I have drinks with coworkers Friday and I need to finish moving Saturday, but I should be done before dinner. We’re gonna head out Sunday morning?”

“Mm-hm,” Jaehyun agrees. “Need any help moving?”

“James ‘s got me,” Mark replies. “It’s okay.”

“Okay.” Jaehyun leans over and kisses his forehead. “Okay if I just lock the bottom lock on my way out?”

“Yeah,” Mark agrees.

“Sleep well, baby.” Jaehyun’s voice moves farther away as he stands. “I already set your alarm.”

Thank you, Mark wants to say. But he’s so tired. He hears Jaehyun give a soft sigh of amusement. Another kiss to his forehead, to send him to sleep. Mark doesn’t even hear Jaehyun close the door.

///

James comes to pick Mark up bright and early, but he has breakfast so Mark doesn’t complain, just hops in the car, shoving his bag in the back.

“Where are you taking Annie?” he asks, taking a bite of his ham and egg croissant.

“Over to Orcas Island,” James says. “Booked a nice hotel room, fancy dinner, you know. We’re trying to catch the ten o’clock ferry, so we’ll basically have to leave as soon as I drop you off.”

“Have fun,” Mark says around a mouthful of food.

Lucy is in high spirits when they arrive, giggling with glee over getting to have a sleepover with her Mark-samchon. She clings to Mark’s leg as her parents finish packing up the car. Mark watches his brother and his sister-in-law, the easy way they have with each other. How Annie can hold her hand out and James knows to pass her his bag without a word. The way they don’t bump into each other, not once, in the chaos of packing up their car because they know each other so well, know exactly where the other is at all times and what they’ll do next. Mark tries to imagine him and Jaehyun like this, years down the road, maybe with a child of their own. The image is fuzzy at best.

Because as much as he and Jaehyun play pretend, what they have isn’t like this. No amount of blankets tucked securely around Mark’s shoulders and kisses pressed to his forehead can change that. Mark is just a passing whim of Jaehyun’s. Jaehyun will, in time, find someone his age, someone more settled, more mature. The warmth of last night seeps away as his brother’s life throws it into sharp contrast. At best, Mark will be a short, beautiful spring in the long years of Jaehyun’s life. Summer will burn through them and autumn will come. The leaves will change, and Jaehyun will have no more use for him. So there’s no point in Mark trying to pursue anything more, because Jaehyun would say no, and even if he didn’t right away, Mark knows eventually he wouldn’t be enough for Jaehyun anymore.

And the worst part is, Mark knows Jaehyun would be right to say no. Because even if they could make it work somehow… then what? Mark probably won’t stay in Seattle, and he certainly can’t settle down right away. Jaehyun won’t just wait for him. He shouldn’t. Mark wouldn’t let him, the same way Jaehyun wouldn’t let Mark shape his life around their relationship.

He gets that terrible tugging feeling again, like he’s straining against the present. He knows it’s going to hurt when he and Jaehyun have to go their separate ways, and Mark almost wishes they could rush through goodbye so he could stop waiting for it, not knowing how bad it will be or how it will feel. He’ll be miserable, he knows, but at least he’ll know where he stands. It’s not like he’s not hurting now. He might as well get it all over with.

James’ voice pulls him out of it. “We’re gonna head out, okay? Just call if you need anything.”

“Sure,” Mark agrees, still half in his own head. “Have fun!”

“Bye!” Lucy calls, waving madly from the doorway until the car pulls out onto the street and disappears.

“Well,” Mark says after they close the door, trying to be present with her instead of drowning in his own head. “What d’you wanna do?”

Lucy pulls him into an elaborate game of make believe, where Mark is an evil king and Lucy and her army of stuffed animals work together to take over his kingdom (the couch in the living room). It ends when Mark allows himself to be pulled to the floor and buried under piles of plush ponies and teddy bears, begging for mercy.

Lucy sits on Mark’s stomach, grinning triumphantly.

“Oof, Luce,” Mark groans, not really meaning it. “You’re gonna be too big to sit on me pretty soon.”

“Not yet though,” she says pertly. “But I wanna grow.”

“Yeah?” Mark can’t hide his amusement.

“Yeah.” Lucy nods seriously, spreading her hand in front of Mark’s face. “Jaehyun-seonsaengnim says I’ll be big enough to play a real piano when I grow more. I’m too small now. But soon.”

“I bet Jaehyun-seonsaengnim is right,” Mark says, regarding her little hand. “You’re outgrowing that little keyboard. It’ll be a while before you can reach the pedals, though.”

“I’ll make Appa press them,” she says, unconcerned. She tips her head. “You and Jaehyun-seonsaengnim are good friends, right?”

Mark starts a little. “Yeah, we’re good friends,” he agrees. “I like him. He’s funny, right?”

Lucy nods. “He thinks you’re funny, too,” she says. “He always smiles when you’re there.”

Mark files that away for Jaehyun later. They better be careful, because it sounds like Lucy is picking up on some things. The last thing he needs is for James to hear from his baby girl that Mark and Jaehyun make eyes at each other every time Mark goes to pick her up.

Lucy has moved on, though; she stands with purpose, releasing him. “I’m hungry,” she says. “Noodles for dinner?”

The night passes uneventfully. Mark makes Lucy bunny-shaped mac and cheese and gives up on trying to explain that Annie’s is also a brand and doesn’t have anything to do with her mom. They share a popsicle and watch cartoons until Lucy’s eyes are drooping, and Mark carts her off to the bathroom to brush her teeth and give her a quick bath before bed. She’s out like a light as soon as her head hits the pillow, and Mark goes back down to clean up the kitchen and then watch some TV until he gets sleepy too.

Around eleven, as Mark’s just thinking about heading to bed, he gets a text from Jaehyun. He thinks about ignoring it, too sore and raw about the things that are breaking ground inside him, but he knows he can’t punish Jaehyun for things that aren’t his fault.

>>> How are things?

Good. Lucy didn’t even complain about bedtime. <<<

I think she’s onto us <<<

>>> uh oh. What do you mean?

she’s noticed us joking around at pickup <<<

she asked if we were good friends <<<

>>> Good friends 👀

Is that the first emoji you’ve ever used in your life <<<

>>> I’m not prehistoric, Mark

>>> so what did you say

yes <<<

hopefully not too nervously <<<

>>> I’m sure it’s fine haha

>>> I’ll keep my distance next week just in case

Well, not too far I hope <<<

Mark pockets his phone and stands, stretching before he goes to put himself to bed. He tries to forget all the tough stuff for now, and lulls himself to sleep remembering the way he fucked Jaehyun against his windows. As far as lullabies go, it’s pretty shoddy, but Mark allows himself the bandaid.

The next morning, Lucy comes to wake him up so he can make them breakfast. They race to the kitchen and Mark asks if she’s ever had chocolate chip pancakes. She shakes her head, shiny hair bouncing excitedly, and Mark considers for a moment the damage he may be inflicting on James and Annie before deciding he doesn’t care because it’ll make Lucy love him forever, and goes to get the flour.

Lucy settles at the breakfast bar while Mark mixes the batter so she can watch (and steal a few chocolate chips out of the bag, which Mark pretends not to see). “So is it true you don’t have a girlfriend?” she asks him as he beats the eggs. “Or boyfriend,” she amends, not-so-sneakily popping another chocolate chip in her mouth.

Mark gives a sort of sigh-laugh, reaching for the vanilla. “I’m too busy, silly! I have school and stuff soon, and then I’m gonna have to look for a job.”

“But,” Lucy protests. “Appa already married Eomma when he was your age.”

“Well,” Mark says patiently. He gets out the big cast-iron griddle and lays it across two burners, then turns the burners on. “Your appa finished school early. Careful of this griddle, ‘kay Luce? It’s gonna get super hot and I don’t want you to burn your hands. It’ll hurt for days and days.” Lucy nods seriously. “Anyway, my brother was lucky enough to meet his person—that’s your eomma—when he was young. Not all of us are that lucky.”

“So… you haven’t found your person yet?” Lucy asks.

Mark thinks of Jaehyun. He shakes his head. “Not yet,” he says, spreading the batter for the first pancakes. “But that’s okay. I think I want to get my career started first, and then see what happens.” He plucks up the bag of chocolate chips before Lucy’s hand can inch any closer. “And don’t think I don’t see you, you little thief. You’d eat the rest of this bag if I let you and then you wouldn’t even get to try the pancakes!”

“No I wouldn’t!” Lucy protests, giggling, but she at least has the decency to look contrite. “I hope I’m like you,” she continues, and Mark blinks. “I don’t wanna get married early. I wanna be a musician like Jaehyun-seonsaengnim and go around the world!”

“I hope you do,” Mark says, smiling at her with genuine amusement.

When James and Annie get home that evening, they rescue Mark from, like, his twentieth round of Go, Fish. James sits with Mark in the living room, helping him clean up all the toys while Annie allows herself to be accosted by her daughter.

“Did she behave?” James asks.

“Oh, yeah,” Mark says. “You got a good kid, man. I may have introduced her to chocolate chip pancakes, though, so… sorry about that.”

Distantly, from the kitchen, they can hear Lucy asking Annie if they can have chocolate chip pancakes in the morning. James laughs to himself. “Well, that means I get to eat them, too, so I’m not complaining. Ready to head home?”

“Yeah.” Mark gathers his shit and says bye to Annie and Lucy before stepping out onto the porch. The sun is going down, and the heat is receding. Summer really is almost over, he thinks. It comes with a flash of unexpected anxiety.

He hops in the car and James joins him, pulling out onto the street. “Annie was thrilled,” he says before Mark can even ask. “So, thanks again.”

Mark nods. “I mean, I got to hang out with Lucy, so it’s no big deal, but I’m glad it went well,” he replies. With a start, he realizes he still needs to tell James about his peninsula plans. “Oh, I meant to tell you. I’m gonna spend next week out on the peninsula, since my internship is over.”

“By yourself?” James asks.

Mark makes a mental note to text Johnny. “Yeah, I asked my friends, but no one was free. And I know I won’t have time once school starts, so.”

“Just be safe, okay? Mom’d wring my fuckin’ neck if something happened to you,” James says. Mark nods, thinking about all the things Mom would wring both of their fuckin’ necks about if she knew.

“Yeah, I know,” he says. “Sorry for not mentioning it sooner, I just kept forgetting. Annie’ll have to pick Lucy up from music lessons.”

“Actually, I think her teacher is gonna be out of town that week, too,” James says, and Mark pretends like this information surprises him. “So no music lessons. Good timing, really.”

“Good,” Mark says, turning to face the window so James can’t try to read his expression. “That’s good.”

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