There has always been something wrong with Occtis

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There has always been something wrong with Occtis

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my 2026, manifested.
AKA a list of things I've manifested to make this year an amazing one, like every year before it!
° my glowup and complete desired appearance from head to toe (down to my hair, teeth and nails).
° perfect health in my body and mind (no chronic sensitivity or pain, no dental issues, no stomach aches or even headaches, etc.)
° my impeccable grades, extracurriculars and school career (awards, recognition from peers and staff, etc.) at my universities.
° being accepted to transfer to my dream school, and everything going smoothly within that process (scholarship/financial aid, passport, visa application, flight, general safety, etc.)
° my social medias all blowing up (youtube, tiktok, tumblr, substack, pinterest).
° my immediate family accepting my queerness and atheism.
° money consistently flowing to me and never running out.
° a fun year, just like a movie. impromptu nights out, a good group of friends, events to attend, memorable hangouts both chill and more highkey, etc.
° multiple sps dispersed throughout the year (sorry yall im going lowkirkenuinely)
° (new addition) shifting effortlessly to my other realities with no methods or build up necessary.
I'll check back in every so often with my inevitable success stories as the year goes on!
WARMING HER PEARLS
Spock has realized he's in love with Captain Kirk. In fact, he's 83 percent sure Jim will return his feelings. Those are pretty good numbers! ....But maybe they could be better?
Irrational Numbers is a 90 page, full color romantic comedy about Spock trying to increase his chances with his Captain (contains 18+ content). You can purchase it from my itch.io store here! https://sidetrek.itch.io/irrational-numbers As always, enormous thanks to the people on my patreon! And if you do end up checking out the story, let me know what you think!
presenting: seasons 1-5 cumulative merthur data analysis
+ data visualisation:
here are the final findings:
arthur glances at merlin’s mouth 209 times. merlin returns 108. arthur remains the thirstier participant from pilot to finale, at no point did this gap meaningfully close. arthur pendragon may be a king, but statistically speaking, he is also the most embarrassing participant in this show. that’s just science.
merlin’s slutty little neck appears 144 times, with 127 of those occurring in seasons 1-2 alone. the dramatic collapse after season 2 leads to a near-total disappearance of The Throat in seasons 3-5. this decline also coincides with the upward trend in merlin’s homicide rate beginning in season 3. this data strongly suggests an inverse relationship between throat exposure and his emotional stability: as his hope and happiness diminishes, both his body count and his neckerchief rises.
arthur makes physical contact with merlin 312 times across the series: 250 instances of normal human contact and 62 incidents classified as Freak Behaviour (thrown objects, aggressive manhandling, and weapon-adjacent foreplay).
for two characters who spend nearly every waking moment together, rely on each other emotionally and physically, and repeatedly risk their lives for one another, there is something deeply unwell about the fact that they only refer to each other as “friends” a total of 20 times. statistically speaking they would rather die, kill, or stare at each other’s mouths than verbally acknowledge what they are to each other.
finally, arthur being told that he’s loved only 7 times across the entire show is actually insane when you consider how badly he wants it :/
this now concludes the analysis. thank you for following this longitudinal study. we are all worse off. please direct all complaints to the BBC itself.
final publication of the merthur studies quarterly. read all volumes here: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5

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a pox on all your houses Shane Hollander/Ilya Rozanov || T || 19k || Part 2 of 2 [COMPLETE] Part 1 || Part 2
Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Getting Together, Sort Of, Situationships, Relationship Status: It's Complicated, Tuna Melt Canon Divergence, Pre-Tuna Melt, Fluff and Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Ilya Rozanov Fucked Around Now He's Finding Out
"Chlamydia?" Ilya has never heard Hollander's voice reach such heights in the absence of a cock. "You have chlamydia?" "I did not get it on purpose," Ilya complains.
Read Part 2 on AO3
Mysterious pipes descend upon the lake... harboring friendly visitors...?