đđ„đąđšđŁ: STRAY KIDS; hwang hyunjin x reader
đđđĄđ„đ: fluff, angst
đȘđąđ„đ đđąđšđĄđ§: 1809.
đȘđđ„đĄđđĄđđŠ: reader has an emotional breakdown, hyperventilating, a bunch of dread in general but hyunjin being the sweetest ever and comforting us through it
Itâs days like today that make you feel like your entire world is crumbling apart. Like things donât make sense, like the world behaves unnecessarily cruel towards you. Nothing was out of the ordinary today. Not one bit, yet you feel the heaviness in your heart grow more and more, and it only reaches a snapping point when you come back home from work.
Usually, the sight of Hyunjin would be all it took to make you forget about anything that happened, but you figure even he has his limits. All you feel when you see him are tears â itâs like a million different images flash in front of you â of his hands stroking your back, of you crying into his shoulder. Regardless, this is the third time in the week youâve bothered him with such antics, so you swallow the lump in your throat and approach a focused Hyunjin, reading a book and sitting on the couch.
âHey loveâŠâ You say dully, pulling his attention onto you as you take off your jacket.
âHey sweetheart!â Hyunjin chimes, his voice trailing off when he notices your expression. You sometimes find yourself marveled by how expressive he is. His eyebrows scrunch ever so slightly, itâs as if heâs compelling his body to fall into a gentle space, a space he seems to understand you require.
âIs everything alright?â Hyunjin asks, keeping the confidence in his voice intact, because heâs well aware of what gets you to open up easily.
Sometimes you wish he wasnât, because every ounce of energy youâd put into maintaining your façade unravels when you look into his eyes.
Tears roll down your cheeks, and you seem to not notice anything other than everything crashing down on you. Soft sobs echo throughout the room, and you vaguely feel Hyunjinâs hands guiding you to the sofa, engulfing you in his embrace and keeping you there. He combs his fingers through your hair, rocking you back and forth.
Everything he does soothes you, yet you canât stop crying.Â
You wonder how Hyunjin ended up with you. Seeing as to how you end up being the last option for everyone you encounter, it feels surreal to know that a man so kind, graceful, so⊠out of your league feels such unconditional love towards you.
âSweetie,â Hyunjin cups your cheeks and makes you look at him when you start hyperventilating, his hands being gentle yet firm enough to force you out of your dizzy state. âLook at me, and breathe â Yes, just like that.â He smiles sadly when you follow his instructions and close your eyes, trying to calm yourself down. But itâs like your body refuses to co-operate, because you end up crying for half an hour straight, snuggling into Hyunjinâs shoulder and letting out everything youâve been holding back all this while.
Youâre pretty sure his sleeve is drenched and that youâve effectively ruined his favorite sweater, but Hyunjin isnât even focused on that â itâs like every little sob from you shatters his heart more, and he wishes he could do more than just hold you. He wishes he could change the people who make you want to cry like this.
When your sobs finally die down to little sniffles, Hyunjin pats your hair slowly. Your eyes are puffy and your nose is red, and your breathing still hasnât evened out.
âCome with me.â Hyunjin says and doesnât wait for your response before lifting you off the couch. On a bright sunny day, youâd protest â youâd laugh, try to kick yourself out of his embrace, do anything to get him to giggle. But right now, all you can do is let him maneuver his way to the balcony. All the while, youâve found peace in his shoulder, and never want to lift your head from it and experience this harsh world once again.
He seats you down on a chair and sits down next to you. You want to whine about the loss of his embrace, but he immediately holds your hand, delicately playing with your fingers and running his thumb along the back of it.
Stargazing has always been one of your favorite activities to calm down. Something about the calm view of the sky, and a million stars twinkling about them as though theyâre all silently encouraging you to cheer up makes you feel warm and fuzzy on the inside. A soft, barely present smile pulls at your lips, and Hyunjin wouldâve definitely missed it if his eyes werenât on you the whole time.
Youâre pretty sure you look like a mess right now, with your eyes all puffy and your hair matted and ruffled, but Hyunjin looks at you like the single most beautiful thing to ever exist. A small part of you feels bad for worrying him so much.
âDo you wanna talk about what happened?â He asks, tightening his grip on your hand reassuringly. You could go on for ages about how gentle Hyunjin was when it comes to you, but right now all you can do is, stare at the night sky and give yourself something to focus on other than the raging emotions inside you.
âIâŠâ You begin reluctantly, and Hyunjin wraps his hands around you, leaning into your embrace, trying everything he can to comfort you. He kisses your cheek and coaxes you to continue. âHm?â
âI-Itâs stupidâŠâ
âNot if itâs affecting you like this, sweetie. What did we discuss before? We donât downgrade our experiences, right? Whatever you feel is valid. You donât have to tell me if you donât want to, but never consider your problems to be stupid.â
You sigh, snuggling into his embrace.
âI donât know, I guess Iâm tired of being everyoneâs last choice?â
Hyunjin only hums, running his hand along your arm soothingly.
âItâs like⊠Even before this job, even before college, I always tried to be friendly, I always tried to fix everything wrong or annoying about me, and yet Iâd either get taken advantage of or end up being left alone.âÂ
You sigh, continuing.
âI just⊠I guess Iâm tired and I donât know whatâs wrong with me, you know? If everyone Iâve met seems to not think of me genuinely, seems to never feel the same amount of attachment I feel for them, then surely I must be wrong with something right? Yet no matter what I do to try and be a better person, it feels like I canât rid myself off of the âlast optionâ nametag.â
Hyunjin places a soft kiss onto your shoulder at that, humming and allowing you to speak your mind more. He always found a way to get you comfortable â it was just the way his aura worked. You never felt like youâd be judged for saying what was on your mind.
âI know that half of it is just my own anxiety and that most of the people who make me feel this way would disagree, but I could state off multiple instances where half my friends would clearly neglect me once they found someone âbetterâ And I know itâs not their duty to make sure I donât feel anxious and donât think that way, but it still hurts.â
âThen thatâs no friend, Y/N.â Hyunjin replies. âA good friend, a true friend, would never leave you like this.â
âBut every single person?â You ask, feeling the tears roll down your cheeks again.
âNot every single person. Our mind often makes us see only the worst of things when we feel sad or depressed, but there are so many people who cherish you for who you are.â Hyunjin pulls you into his lap and lets you lie on his shoulder, fingers rubbing soft circles on your skin. âMe, for instance. When we were just friends, would you have ever said I made you feel that way?â
âNever.â You answer immediately. Hyunjin had not once made you feel left out when you were friends. You consider Hyunjinâs friend group to be fairly large, and even once your relationship started, he managed to find a way to spend equal time with both his friends and with you.
âThen you have your answer.â Hyunjin smiles at you. You feel your heart flutter at the sight. His eyes hold more stars than the sky above you right now, his expression conveying everything words could never put together. Youâve never felt as loved as you feel right now.
âSee, Y/N.â Hyunjin intertwines your fingers together. âThe only thing you can truly control in this world is the way you act and the way you carry yourself, at least in a social setting. The way people perceive you, no matter what anyone says, is not something you can control to an extent greater than some basic level.â
You nod, allowing him to continue.
âYou could do everything right. You could be the best human being to ever exist, you could do everything good that you possibly can for a person â but if they still choose to perceive you in bad ways? Itâs not something you can control, really. Theyâre just dimwits for letting their jealousy, or their ill conceived notions ruin an amazing friendship.â You feel yourself smile when he kisses your cheek. âAnd I can say from personal experience, that you are a wonderful person to be friends with.â
You hum, unable to speak anything due to warm feeling in your chest. You hold him tightly, afraid that letting go would somehow dissolve this moment, and take you back to the cold tears of sadness.
âYou canât control the way people think, Y/N, but what you can control is how much you attach yourself to them, and how much you expose yourself to them. I know it isnât easy when you see each other every single day, but itâs a step you need to take.â
âMhm,â You hum in understanding. âI get you. It seems like the most logical way, but like you said, itâs⊠so hard to execute it.â
âWell, then take it slow, sweetie. No oneâs forcing you, nor do you have a deadline to meet.â The darkness of the night is comforting, in a way, especially when you have your favorite person speaking the sweetest things to you.Â
âOne step at a time, yeah? You can start slow by trying to distance yourself from them and then work on not feeling hurt when you see them abandon you like that. Okay?â He asks.Â
You take a deep breath, trying to process everything that happened. âOkay, I get you.âÂ
Perhaps things werenât so bad after all.Â
No matter what happened, you were sure Hyunjin would always be by your side. And that was something to be happy about, even if it felt like the world crumbled around you, because in the end, heâd always be there.
đđšđ§đđąđ„'đŠ đĄđąđ§đ: Hey guys! Itâs been a long time since Iâve written, so please excuse the rusty writing. Also Iâm sure the advice Hyunjin gives here could possibly not be the best advice, but I wrote this fic in a time where i was sad and felt everyone around me hated me, but iâve been working on trying to not feel that way. regardless, if anyone feels this way, know that if youâre worrying about being a bad person, then you probably aren't. We all make mistakes, and we become a better version of ourself every single day. Peace out <3
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
â Live Streamingâ Interactive Chatâ Private Showsâ HD Qualityâ Free Actions
Free to watch âą No registration required âą HD streaming
â„[bang chan] protecting you when the tram stops too abruptlyâŠ
Leaning against your boyfriend in the tightly packed space of the tram on your way back from a museum date, youâd already forgotten what ridiculous joke you were laughing at. The tens of pairs of eyes probably staring at you, possibly even glaring, phased you no longer when he stood beside you, that dumb wide smile on his face, too proud of himself for his own good.
You paid no mind as he playfully rolled his eyes and looked away from you. âCome on, it wasnât that funny! Youâre overexââ
Both of you were cut off, stumbling about. Quiet squeals of surprise and curses of the passengers filled the tram. The tram came to an abrupt stop, blaring its horn at the car that had swerved into its lane.
You almost would have lost your footing right then. Your hand reached to grab onto the railing to keep yourself upright. Chan was faster than you.Â
Before you knew it, his left arm wrapped around your shoulders, pulling you tightly into his chest, as his right arm held onto rails. You sighed out in belief when your feet felt steady again and the tram continued its way calmly again.Â
âAre you okay?â he asked you, hand lowering to rub your back in a soothing manner as you nodded. He breathed out in relief and offered you a smile that made you forget as fast as the event had happened.
â„[lee minho] waiting for you at the bus stop late at nightâŠÂ
Anxiously, you waited for your stop. The streets were dark behind the bus windows, barely recognisable at all as night-time rain covered everything in sight. A part of you worried you had unknowingly missed your stop already. The streetlights did little to ease your worries.
Finally, you reached your stop, a place you now gladly found you could recognize even in terrible conditions like this. Or rather, you could recognize the person you called your home even as rain did its best to cover him. You were on your feet in a momentâs notice, half-running to the doors that seemed to fold open slower than ever before, keeping you from what youâd been looking forward to all day.
You slipped through the doors before they could even fully open, already running to hide under the umbrella he had brought along. As you took a moment to recover from the shock of the cold rain, you heard his soft laugh and felt a pat on your head.Â
Minho smiled at you brightly when you finally looked at him. âI missed you, love.â
Expectantly, you opened your arms. He only hesitated a moment before pulling you into his warm embrace. He scoffed against your forehead. âYouâre freezing cold. Give me your hand. Letâs go home and warm you up.â
â„[seo changbin] falling on a stranger during a rough turnâŠÂ
As the bus shook and rumbled and screeched, you began to wonder if public transportation was really even half as safe as the media made it out to be. As the driver ran another visibly red light, you seriously started considering calling the police for the safety of the public.Â
âSeriously, what is this?â you heard someone grumble from beside you. It was now that you noticed that a young man had taken the standing spot at the back door, the first man standing. And clearly regretting it, if his white-knuckled grip on the seat in front of him was any indication to go by.
The bus jerked in a curve, too sudden for anyone to fully grasp the situation. Most people stayed in their seats, gripping onto their seats in pure terror and already yelling curses at the driver and threatening him with the police.
You were an unlucky passenger. Before you knew what had happened, you were all but flying out of your aisle seat and in the direction of the young man you had just been watching. To your surprise, you felt arms wrap around your waist instead of the cold embrace of the floor.Â
Looking up, you found the young man staring at you with wide eyes, arms still tightly around you as he struggled to keep the both of you up. âOh my god, are you okay?!â
â„[hwang hyunjin] strangers taking the same train home every dayâŠ
Perhaps you were too curious for your own good, or maybe you were just nosy, but you just loved to watch the people on the train home. Or perhaps you didnât want to know about them, but simply wished to imagine a reality different from your own, to live a life through the people you saw but never spoke to.Â
The people on the train tended to change every once in a while. Some would move to a different part of town, some would quit their jobs, some would graduate school â they all went on to live a different chapter of their lives in a different place, never to take this train again.
But he always stayed, and he never changed. The boy in the third coach, always seated in a window seat for as long as you could remember. He wore neat and fashionable clothes, much resembling a model fresh off a magazine cover, and he was always listening to something on his phone as he stared out the window the same way you stared at him.
You liked to think he was young and successful and took the train just because he liked the 3 pm view. But one day, âyou thought and averted your eyesâ, you would find out his true story. One day youâd stop imagining and just go up to him and askâ
âWhatâs your name?â He appeared right in front of you, a curious look in his eyes.Â
â„[han jisung] sharing earphonesâŠÂ
âIs it just me or is the bus extra noisy today?â Jisung wondered from your side. You wanted to laugh at the adorable confused frown etched onto his brows. Noticing your fond stare, his eyes narrowed suspiciously. âWhat?â
You shook your head and looked out the window. Campus was still a long way off. You mumbled, âItâs the breaks. Theyâre worn out and screeching.â
âSo noisy,â he sighed out and leaned against your shoulder. He didnât remain there for long even as you lifted your hand to play with his hair.Â
He pulled out of your half-conscious embrace and dove into his backpack, mumbling something under his breath. Before long, he returned with a victorious chuckle, the tangled cords of his old trusty earphones hanging between his fingers.
Plugging them into his phone, he offered you one. âLetâs listen to something a bit nicer for a chance. Else weâll both have headaches before academic writing class.â
Your ears would surely thank you for taking the earphone from him as he fiddled with a music app on his phone. Soon a cheerful melody began playing in your ear, contrasting and almost drowning out the painful screeching. A smile tugged at your lips.
âWait, are these mono or stereo?â you heard him mumble as he fussed with his earphone. You laughed as he shook his head in defeat and leaned back against your shoulder, eyes already falling closed to enjoy your presence.
â„[lee felix] giving you his seat on the bus after a long dayâŠÂ
Though he got off work way before you ever did, he always insisted on taking the same bus home. He never told you why, but when you brought it up he gave you this one look that made you wonder if he was just as clueless as you were.
And despite how much you teased him for always waiting for the later bus with a bag of take-out and a semi-fresh bubble tea, you couldnât help but feel strangely fond when you stepped onto the bus and saw his face light up. Habitually, he lifted up his cup as a salute before grabbing your hand the moment you reached him.Â
âHow was your day?â he always asked you, peering at you from his seat as though every word you told him was important enough for history books.Â
Before answering, you glanced around. The bus was more full than usual. You had no chance to sit and rest your legs, as much as you wanted to. You sighed.Â
But your boyfriend was no fool. Before you could even voice your concern, his eyes widened and he hopped out of his seat only to push you to sit instead. âHoney, youâre exhausted!â
Though you tried to protest, he shook his head and pressed his hand against your shoulder, effectively making you sit still. âIâve been sitting for a while already. You need this seat more than I do, love. Get some rest.â
One day youâd repay the favour.
â„[kim seungmin] falling asleep on your shoulderâŠÂ
The gentle rocking and steady rumble of the train were more than soothing. Glancing at the clock on your phone, you momentarily considered taking a nap. But then you could miss your stop⊠You sighed and leaned back in your seat, opting to just stare out the window for now. Youâd find something to do for the next hour.
In your dilemma, you hadnât noticed him boarding the train at the edge of the city. He glanced around somewhat hesitantly before taking the spot next to you. You didnât mind, too busy in your own thoughts and fantasies.
Ten, or maybe fifteen, minutes passed. Something heavy pulled you out of your thoughts so roughly you almost forgot where you were. It only took a moment to pinpoint the source of the heavy weight on your shoulder.Â
The handsome young man had rested his head against you, probably unwitting and too deep in his fatigue to really choose. You contemplated pushing him off, or maybe waking him up gently.Â
But your eyes fell on the dark bags under his eyes, remnants of many sleepless nights. His hair was ruffled from a long day, a contrast to the tidy yet casual suit he donned. You glanced at the time once again before making a decision: just this once, youâd be the pillow of this man.
â„[yang jeongin] public shows of affection that feel like a little secretâŠÂ
Masks over your noses, dutifully covering the lower parts of your faces, you and Jeongin stood face to face on the tram. Though you could not see his smile fully, you knew he was smiling at you, just like you were at him.Â
It was these simple moments that made you appreciate his existence by your side even more. The moments where you were close enough to touch but too engrossed in your conversation to care. Only his fingers periodically brushed against yours on the railing, reminding him of your proximity.
ââand Iâm just saying that the plot holes in that movie wereââ your rant was cut off as he leaned down to brush his mask-covered nose over yours. Whatever you were saying was completely wiped from your mind.Â
He laughed at the dumbfounded look in your eyes. âWhy? I canât show you love?â
â... Not while Iâm ranting about the Avengers,â you mumbled, feeling somewhat shy all of a sudden. But beside that shyness was a sense of expectation. Would he go a step further?
As if reading your thoughts, he laughed again, mumbling something about âdeadly cutenessâ under his breath as he glanced up at the ceiling for a moment. You accepted defeat in that moment.
But when the tram came to a stop and people around you were bustling on and off, leaving and claiming seats all around you, Jeongin surprised you once again. You watched as he briefly lowered his mask and pressed his lips against your forehead. Just as fast as it had happened, he covered his face again and averted his eyes, now feeling shy as well.Â
You were sure this moment would be engraved into your mind for days to come.
â warning :Â swearing, mentions of violence, blood, injuries, stitches
â summary :Â a self-proclaimed god shows up at your door in the middle of the night for a place to stay. you let him and hope the unconventional encounter doesnât become a regular thing. of course, it becomes a regular thing.
â sequel blurb : read it here!
â dedicated to @poutylinoâ : happy birthday robi! i hope youâll like this mess of a fic âĄ
There is a stranger in your living room.
There is a stranger in your living room.
There isâholy shit...you need to call the cops.
âOut of the way,â the stranger spats calmly.Â
âShow me your face.â
He is unfortunately very good-looking; the kind of face that all beings envy for God only has one favorite and thatâs him, the kind of face that makes the most expensive diamond look dull in comparison, the kind that screams âtougher in body and nobler in heart than any creature in the worldâ like any novelâs protagonist. Oh yeah, did you mention that he has a really nice physique too?
âI said, move.â He stumbles forward, heavy and inconsistent breaths.
In any case, heâs someone youâve never met before in your life. Therefore, your brain is overworking itself to figure out what the fuck is going on (as if itâs not overworked on a daily basis already). One moment you were minding your own business on the couch and stressing over your homework. The next, thereâs an explosion of light and there he was. Meaning, this absolutely skeptical, worthy-of-being-reported man canât just expect you to simply move.
âLast time I checked, this is my living room, which youâre not supposed to be in,â you tilt your head curiously at his silhouette being cast on the white wall. âYou should move.â
Your gaze rolls upward again to meet his eyes. You think lack of sleep is really getting into your head because there are two golden orbs staring right back at you. He leans forward to pick up the butter knife on your coffee table, easily twirling the shiny piece of cutlery between his fingers.Â
âHeyâ!â An alarm finally goes off inside your head, high on sheer anxiety and panic. If you decided to do something rash, he might slice your throat in half.
âIâm just going to make it clear that Iâm not responsible for whatâs about to happen to your face,â he mumbles under his breath, staggering with difficult steps. His limbs are nearly immobile but are being forced to drag a heavy body across your tiled floor. Two trails of crimson become more visible as he walks out of the shadow. Another alarm shakes your senses, telling you that the man can collapse any second now.
Just then, a linear light emerges into your view, metal flies past your head and pierces the bookcase behind your back. A shaky breath. With ineffable terror, you behold an ominous creature in which shadows cling to its hellish movements. The horror struggles and emits an unholy screech against the butter knife, gleaming its bat-like teeth at you before disintegrating into thin air.Â
You drop to your knees, mouth gape open, âIâm going insane. Iâm going insane. Iâm going insaââ
A loud thud startles your train of thought. âHoly shit!â
Your head whips around upon the sound only to witness the strangerâs reclined figure on your floor. His brows are knitted tightly together as his palm hugs the side of his shoulder. You give the air a faint sniff once you shuffle close enough and realize how much heâs bleeding. WhoâŠhurt him?
Maybe getting murdered is easier than having to deal with this, whatever the fuck that just happened.Â
Surprisingly, it takes him thirty minutes to wake up and two minutes to say his name as youâre walking back and forth in your living room like a madwoman, desperate for a solution and a conviction that everything was not a fucked up nightmare. You are, at some point, this close to taking him to a hospital but looking at him up close helps you understand that the exhaustion his body is bearing clearly goes beyond humansâ physical abilities. Minho looks tired of the world for having to carry around baggage thatâs too heavy for himself. Somehow, you feel like youâre part of the baggage itself.
However, your empathy quickly evaporates when you walk out of your bathroom and see the fool roaming your house without a shred of care for the universe. Yes, heâs still bleeding. And yes, he doesnât look concerned. Youâre in serious need of moral support right now but your friends all have questionable morale.Â
Minho pauses at the blinking laptop on your table with a cup of hot tea in his hands, âHmm? So youâre teaching at a university this young? Impressive. You must be pretty smart.â
âIâm an underpaid, overworked, minimum-wage TA,â you toss him your best passive-aggressive glare and settle on your couch with a first aid kit, âCome here. Sit.â
Which is how you end up in your conveniently bloodied living room at half-past twelve with a man who can easily bleed out to his demise. To your dismay, he follows your ushering without protest, watching you with the attentiveness of a worn-out hawk. You look at him once his legs are crossed obediently, taking in the scattered cuts on his face and the dirty white shirt over his black tank top. Curiosity traces your features at the bandages around his neck and wrists, and he looks back.
âI canât believe youâre ordering a god around. Iâm not a dog.â Minho notices where your gaze lingers and clears his throat.Â
You furrow your brows, reasonably unimpressed, âReally? You almost killed me and now youâre telling me this? Do you hear yourself? How is this going to make my life any easier?â How are you supposed to comfort people when they break into your house again? You stitch them up while trying to avoid looking them in the eye? Maybe making them a hot drink? And letting them stay the night, too?
Youâre not necessarily a âpeople personâ. Thinking about it gives you hives.
âSarcasm? Thatâs all youâve got?âÂ
âGet used to it,â you open your mouth when the alcohol spray hits his wound, prompting a small hiss of discomfort. âYouâre telling me that youâre a god yet you used my freaking butter knife to kill...â
âA curse,â Minho says between gritted teeth as you clean up his cut. âAnd I grabbed your knife because one, it was the only sharp object in reach, and two, I lost my sword.â
A sword, huh. Why would people own a sword these days? You hope his sword isnât a real one because dying by a sword seems so unnecessarily dramatic. Itâd feel like your life is a fantasy novel and youâve stupidly offended someoneâs honor. Is he a cosplayer of some sort? So youâre patching up a cosplayer at one in the morning. A cosplayer that apparently materializes out of thin air. How the fuck are cosplayers so advanced these days?Â
â...A curse?â
âCurses are born from humansâ negative emotions. It is my job to exorcise them before they can grow into full-fledged demons,â Minho explains briefly while glancing around your apartment like a cautious cat.Â
You have a feeling that youâre slowly comprehending the situation even though his claims make no feasible sense. âOkay, and how did you get hurt?â
âI got hit by a truck while trying to save a puppy on the streets.â And he just brings you back to square one. Even so, someone whoâs willing to get hit by a truck for a puppy canât be a psychotic serial killer.Â
You open your mouth and close it. The process repeats about five times before you realize how much youâre acting like an absolute fool. For the first time in your life, youâd rather cry over midterms instead of whatever this is. Because the thing is youâre confident in your ability to read in between the lines, seeing through peopleâs deception and hidden secrets. Even so, you cannot decipher the truth that heâs carrying.
â...Youâre a god yet you let a truck run you over?â
Thereâs a scowl on his face now. âI lost my sword.â
You breathe. And you breathe again. âYouâd better connect the dots for me before I lose my mind and set someoneâs house on fire.â
The scowl deepens, âYes, gods donât usually get hit by vehicles. But for me, I canât deliberately walk through physical materials unless I have my sword.â
âSeems legit. I wish the police were still open at this hour,â you shrug and smile fakely, holding up a syringe in front of his nose.Â
Minho looks mortified, which is rich coming from a self-proclaimed god that just exorcised a curse out of your dirt-broke apartment. âWait! Wait! What do you think youâre doing?!â His body shuffles away in sheer fright like a toddler getting vaccinated for the first time. You think you might feel bad for laughing.Â
âIâm going to give you an injection. Give me your arm.â
âYeah, your spidey senses are tingling perfectly, Peter Parker,â he sneers like a possessed cat, an accusing finger pointing at the clear substance. Wow, allegedly a god can make pop culture references, too. âWhat the fuck is that?â
You raise an eyebrow at his untrusting eyes, âAnesthesia so you donât cry like a little bitch when I stitch you up.â
Minho looks more concerned than you are right now which is extremely unfair, by the way. âStitches? You know how to do that?â
âNo, but I have a YouTube tutorial from a real doctor if that makes you feel better.â
His lips twitch after a long beat of silence. â....Can I have something stronger than tea? Vodka, maybe?â
Itâs truly unfortunate for him. You donât own a single bottle of liquor.
Three days after your unconventional encounter with a god, there comes another one. This one, however, does not occur at your place.
âThank you for looking after Hyunjin on such short notice, Y/N.â Mrs.Hwang gives you a small smile with her purse over her shoulder and her husband ushers her to get into the car from the front gate. âHe is upset because our puppy has gone missing for a few days now but Iâm sure heâll behave. His bedtime is at nine and weâll be back at twelve-ish or so.â
âItâs no trouble. Mrs. Lee is out of town tonight so she said I could bring Felix over,â you smile back tiredly when the freckled kid hides behind your leg since Hyunjin is too busy staring daggers at him. âYou guys go have fun.â
âNo sweets before bed, okay!â
Hyunjinâs parents quickly pull out of the driveway when you lock the door and lead the two children into the backyard. A wave of exhaustion washes over your full mind. You have a class to teach tomorrow with a review quiz and now you have to babysit another kid?
âHeâs so short,â Hyunjin speaks up shamelessly, sitting cross-legged on the wooden porch as Felix clings to your arm. The kidâs eyes are wide and dark in curiosity as he scans the foreign surroundings. This makes you acknowledge how his parents are always busy and often leave him at daycare overtime.Â
âHeâs like five years old, Hyunjin. Youâre already nine,â you pat Felixâs head as a consent signal for him to play around in the backyard. âAnd can you stop glaring at him like heâs eaten all of your cheesecakes, please?â
A pout forms on his lips. âI lost Kkami,â he looks down at his feet sullenly. âMom said she already put out flyers and online posts but...what if heâs not coming back?â
You blink once, twice, and thrice. Oh goodness, why did you agree to be a babysitter when youâre bad at comforting people?Â
âIâm sure someone will find Kkami and bring him back,â you try to reassure him with a hand on his shoulder; being a hypocrite isnât your thing but thereâs nothing else you can give him right now other than false hope. âFor the time being, why donât you hang out with Felix?âÂ
At this point, Hyunjin is already too seasoned to take the bait. He side-eyes Felix to examine his chubby face, weirdly focused. Itâs like you thoughtâhe has never been around anyone else his age because heâs homeschooled, much less someone this much younger than him.Â
âHow?â Hyunjin tilts his head at you, eyes sparkling. Itâs kinda sad but fucking adorable. You get why people are soft for the little brats now. Theyâre cute, just lack the ability to shut up at the right time.Â
âYou kids can play whatever as long as I can see you. Just donât make him dizzy, heâll barf.â
Felix seems to have eavesdropped on your conversation and is now staring up at you from the lower ground. âUhm, can we play hide and seek?â
âSuperb idea, Felix,â Hyunjin cracks a wide grin at that. Surprise surprise, the kid actually has some range.Â
âWhatâs âsuperbâ?â The freckled boy scratches his cheek in confusion.Â
Hyunjin tries to reply with expressive hands, âItâs uh, it's great!â
âWhatâs great?â
âSuperbâŠâ
âWhatâs âsuperbâ?â
âŠThis is going to take a while, isnât it?
All things concluded, it takes Felix ten minutes to stop asking what âsuperbâ means and another hour for you to tuck both of them into bed. Those brats really had the audacity to fall asleep next to each other in the utility closet in the middle of the game. After that, a much-needed silence goes on for about twenty minutes until a man kicks his way in through the living room.Â
âThere is such a thing as doors,â you tell him, barely glancing up from the book that youâre reading.Â
âBut thatâs boring.â Itâs not the voice that you have been expecting. Well, you shouldnât be so surprised anymore.Â
âYouâre paying to fix the window or Iâm calling the cops.âÂ
You finally decide to look up at the owner of the voice and to your dismay, it isnât the self-proclaimed god youâre familiar with. Heâs also very good-looking but his energy seems more careless and free-spirited than Minho. Thereâs a red pair of headphones around his neck, a flannel over a loose shirt with some jeans.Â
Totally normal. He can even pass as a harmless high school student. Unfortunately, your perception of peopleâs clothing has changed since the day Minho broke into your apartment.Â
âMy name is Han Jisung,â he introduces himself and snaps his fingers as the shattered shards of glass easily piece themselves back together. Heâs lucky that the kids are heavy sleepers. âAnd Iâm assuming youâre the girl that Minho talked about.. So where is he?â
Your eyebrow twitches in disbelief. âHow would I know?â
âHe told me to meet up here though,â Jisung rubs the back of his neck sheepishly as if heâs slowly taking in the fact that you donât know him and he doesnât know you either. So what, is he here to exorcise another curse? If thatâs the case, youâd better put Mrs. Hwangâs number on standby in case her house collapses or something.Â
The brunet boy grumbles, as he should, âWhatâs taking that fucking idiot so long?â
On cue, thereâs another explosion of light, the same one that nearly blinded you three days ago. And there stands Minho in all his glory of...dirt and grass and...why is there a puppy in his arms?
âJisung, I think I already taught you how to knock and greet people properly.âÂ
You scowl at him, âOh, look whoâs talking. I donât think light counts as a proper way to greet people.â
âShe has a point,â Jisung shrugs.Â
Minho has an expression that screams betrayal and you feel bad for almost laughing. âYouâre supposed to be on your fatherâs side.âÂ
You swear, Jisung looks like heâs about to throw up. âYouâre not my father!â
âI created you! You exist because of me! You literally came from my spine, you stupid bird!â
âI reject your influence.â
âThat would mean suicide.â
âThis is no way to treat your son.â
âDo not use that tone with me! The amount of disrespectâdo you think I would ever talk to my father that way?! I donât think so!â
âWhy you always gotta harsh my mellow, old man?â
Lost in incoherent thoughts, you can barely comprehend their conversation. But the realization hits you that 1) Hyunjinâs parents are almost home, 2) the kids are still asleep upstairs, 3) there are two morons spatting nonsense at each other in the Hwangsâ living room.Â
âShut the fuck up! Both of you! Just shut up! Are you here just to uppercut each otherâs ego or are you going to give me an exorcism? What the absolute fuck?!â Your patience snaps and the two of them pause, simultaneously turning their heads to stare at you like youâre batshit crazy. Guess whose fault is that? âThank you. Important question, by the way, whose dog is that? Iâll smack you if it dirties the carpet.â
Minho frowns down at the puppy wrapped in his white shirt like a burrito. His hair is entangled in leaves and short branches while the little demon is very intent on licking his bruised cheek. For some reason, you grin like a sadist at the discomfort on his face.Â
âItâs the kidâs puppy. I think his name was Kkami or something. I saw flyers all over Gangnam,â he replies flatly as if his brain is recalling the horrendous moments of chasing the dog in the middle of a cramped highway. âDid you know that heâs been staying up every night crying about this mop of furry ball, I could hardly sleep. How old is he? Five?â
You hold back a small smirk. âHeâs nine, actually.âÂ
âGreat, I still donât know anything about kids.â
âYou know what, kindly leave the dog and get out.â
Youâre really lucky that Hyunjinâs parents came back before twelve because the last thing you need right now is having an earful of a toddlerâs unholy, overjoyed screeches when his lost puppy is back home in one piece. Not to mention, they told you to go home early and let them look after Felix until his mom comes back tomorrow. Mrs. Hwang and her are best friends either way.
Wait, back it up a little. Did you just say that youâre lucky?
No, you take that back. Because Minho is currently trailing after you under the faint downpour, his white shirt pathetically draped over his mop of hair as the rain gradually wets the fabric. Meanwhile, Jisung walks behind him with two hands propped on his nape like heâs in his element. Heâs even humming a tune of some sort. Youâre about to get lost in the melody because his voice is really nice until you realize that itâs clearly not okay for outsiders to witness....whatever this is.
âWhy the hell are you following me?âÂ
Minho answers honestly, âI need the job.â
âWhat job?â
He suppresses a groan, âYou knowâ!â
âPfff, hold on.â You pull your steps to a halt when a light bulb goes off. âReally? Youâre telling me that you want to babysit Hyunjin?â
A shrug leaves his shoulders like itâs no big deal. âYeah, I need the money.â
âWhy? Arenât you a god?â You make a face at him as you turn around, leaning your umbrella forward enough to cover his head. The rain is getting heavier, you should get to the bus stop soon because youâre not sure when the latest ride is.
Jisung declares from the back like that one nosy kid in class in which nobody ever asks for his opinions, âHeâs broke and needs to eat food or else heâll die.â
âWhat about you? Donât you need to eat?â The brunet boy shakes his head. Jisung can easily pass as the boy-next-door type the more you look at him. âAnd he called himself your fatherâIâm sorry Iâm just confused with this relationship. What are you? His sidekick slash adoptive child?â
Although Minho hates the fact that Jisung takes his daily torment as a form of entertainment, no one gets to talk shit about him. Come on, he does have some kind of parental dignity as a god. âHeâs my sacred sword.â
âNothing shocks me at this point,â you blink only once this time because youâre adapting to his shit way too quickly. âYeah, I donât get it. How does that work?â
âJisung is a descendant of the vermilion bird. Their fire is known to possess an extremely strong anti-evil property. So I hatched him from an egg and extracted his soul into a blade.â
âYouâre leaving out the fun part,â Jisung strides up to Minhoâs side and clears his throat like heâs about to announce something important. âBefore I became a blade, they planted my soul in his spine, andââ
Instantly, Minho slaps a hand over his mouth, hard enough to make him stagger backward and yelp aloud like a child throwing their usual tantrum. Remember what you said ten seconds ago? About the whole ânothing can shock you anymoreâ statement? Yeah, you take that back too.Â
âOkay, okay,â you hold out a hand, âItâs too early for that, too early.â
âListen, Iâd be as shocked as you are if I werenât eight hundred years old,â Minho presses a palm to his wrinkled forehead, âBut I just need the job. Canât you just tell the kidâs parents that Iâm the one who found Kkami? Itâd be easier to convince them if itâs coming from the both of us.â
âAnd why should I help you? I canât just hand over a toddler to someone who looks like heâs been homeless for months.â
âItâs technically been a year,â Jisung tacks on unhelpfully.Â
Minho roughly pulls the white shirt off his head and runs a hand through his hair. His eyes screw close for a moment as he exhales through his nose. He can swear he catches you giggling soundlessly but by the time his eyes open again your face is as blank as a white sheet of paper. âHey, I think weâre backtracking a little here. Hello? Do you want me to starve to death so you can have an easy way out?â
âItâs not the worst way out. I can take it,â Jisung snickers and you think Minho is about to choose violence.
Instead, he turns to you. His cold hands grab yours like a man lost at sea who just finds his only lighthouse. âY/N, come on. I exorcised a curse from your home the other day. Canât you at least do me this favor?â His voice is so delicate that youâre afraid you might break him if you let go, as thin as a blade of grass and with as much emotion as human bodies have water. It pulls at a string in your rib cage and melts you at the same time.Â
But youâre also a sadist. âWell, I patched you up the same exact night.â
Minho can see the corner of your lips curling up. Great, now thereâs another being who gets some sort of sick, twisted amusement out of tormenting him, he just knows it.
âDo me another favor and Iâll repay you. Iâm the type of person who canât stand owing anyone a single thing.â
He huffs in disbelief, âWhat? Seriously? All I want is to provide that lonely kid some company. Isnât he an only child? And heâs homeschooled, too, right? I am shocked and appalled that youâre not letting a god do any good deeds.âÂ
âReally? You care that much, huh?â Your expression morphs into something unreadable. âWhatâs his name, then?â
Thereâs a fine line between being boldly stupid and stupidly bold. You donât think a god would ever be desperate to the point of landing right on that thread. âIâm sorry, what?â
Yeah, no. Youâre not playing his game. âThe kid that youâre just dying to look after. Iâm asking you to tell me his name. What-is-it?â
The internal turmoil of confusion going off in his eyes is so fucking clear that you nearly wheeze. âWell, uh, you know. Itâs uh, it startsâstarts with an âAâ,â he raises his index finger expectantly.
You crack a smile while shrugging off your jacket, âH.â
âRight, âHâ! Thatâs close. I mean, theyâre basically neighbors. You can at least understand my mistake!â
âOf course,â you roll your eyes to the moon. âItâs Hyunjin.â
Finally, Minho gives up and throws his hands into the air, âOkay, fine! Iâm in it for the money! And spare me, Wonder Woman, youâre not babysitting those little demons for free either.â
You purse your lips before dropping your jacket over his head. âHey, at least I pretend to be nice to people.â
âYeah, whatever, uhâWait, pretend?â
âMinho!â Jisung shouts, eyes alarmed.
A pitch-black spike tears through air in a linear movement. Minhoâs body immediately twitches into motion like second nature. Faster than a lightning bolt, a hand covers your head while the other around the small of your back. Your head buzzes with discomfort at the faint whiplash and your senses settle in when droplets gradually wet your skin.Â
âStay back! Itâs not a curse!â Minho snaps in a firm tone and shoves you away, leaving you flabbergasted as Jisung catches you by the shoulders.Â
Once again, you behold a hellish being with the black abomination of head and limbs that are not those of any creatures wrought by God. This horror seems to have a brighter mind of its own compared to the one in your apartment. It slowly rises to the height of a tall man, shadows moving and swaying with the manners of a great serpent. The round black head, with no visible ears or hair, leans to the side with eyes glowing hotly as coals.Â
Another spike shoots this way with twice the speed and accuracy from before. Minho manages to lean to the side but pauses halfway, reaching out to catch it bare-handed. The sharp object sizzles against his skin, forcing him to bite down on his lips to hold back a wince. I really shouldnât be touching these things directly, he curses inwardly and drops it to the ground, completely unaware that the bandages on his neck are torn.
Minho blinks and suddenly the creature is baring its bat-like teeth right before his nose, looming over him as if threatening to swallow him whole. His pupils dilate in a slight panic. Half a second and heâs over the shadow in the air to throw out a precise ax kick. It simply bursts at the contact, letting his foot slam violently into concrete, leaving evident cracks. Physical attacks donât work on this kind, he figures as much.
âHan! Come here!â
Jisung lets go of your arms as his body disintegrates into a streak of light and materializes into another form once he touches Minhoâs fingers. A black blade gleams dangerously under the dim moonlight and the demon visibly shrinks at the sudden presence.Â
Somehow, it opens its mouth to speak in a gibberish manner, âThis is already the third time youâve been banished from Heaven. The cursed shackles on your body speak for themselves. Whatâs the point in executing curses and demons anymore?â
Minho exhales calmly and turns around to wield his sword. The blade effortlessly cuts through the neck of another demon behind his back. His eyes are devoid of emotion when its head drops to the ground, immobile and unmoving. His breaths are growing heavier, his muscles trembling in pure adrenaline. âThat isnât for you to decide.âÂ
âArenât you ashamed of yourself?â The demon from earlier doesnât back down and continues to taunt, âOf how many innocent lives had died by your hands? You slaughtered your own believers.â
âIt doesnât concern me.â
âYouâre too easy. Fighting instead of worrying about that mortal.â
Minhoâs vision begins to grow smudged and blurred from the adrenaline but his stubbornness manages to keep his eyes wide enough.Â
The moment wind whistles past his ear, an invisible strike cuts through thin air in your direction. Minho turns half an inch, reaches out to the transparent stake and it digs deep into the flesh of his finger before erupting in vermilion flames.Â
His foot stomps on concrete so harshly to the point that he can feel the ground shatter. His body moves at an inhuman speech, directly padding up against the creature of darkness. The blade in his hand switches between precise slashes and violent stabs with dexterity, drawing out countless streaks of light. His white shirt flutters in the wind and in the guise of his cold rage.Â
You widen your eyes, not realizing that your knees are trembling. Thereâs a split second where his eyes meet yours. A deeply layered pain flashes in his eyes and a chill runs down your spine. With contradicting feelings, your soul shudders.Â
The demon eventually gives out due to the horrendous amount of damages, tripping over itself onto the ground. Minho points his blazing sword directly at its worn-out neck and his voice twists gruesomely, âWho the fuck are you calling easy?â It doesnât sound like a question, more like a threat.Â
âAdmit it. You arenât meant to be a god,â the demon laughs, ugly and broken. âYou canât be one of them if you detest them.â
âIt doesnât matter if itâs gods, humans, or demons. I detest them all equally.â
âYet youâre still handicapping yourself to protect all these mortals.â
âI think youâre wasting your breath.â Minhoâs brows are crumpled, his shoulders tense and his throat jumps as he swallows, âIâll be sending you to join your friend soon.â
Minhoâs fist curls up and comes in contact with the brick wall roughly. It does nothing to release his inner turmoil. He squeezes the hilt of his sword and ignores Jisungâs shouts at the back of his mind.Â
His features morph into a scowl as his temple aches with every word of the demon that he can recall. Allegedly, moving on in this state was a grave mistake. Trying to put his middle finger up against Heavenâs regulations wasnât something someone as smart as him shouldnât have screwed around with.Â
âItâs not like I can die either. What the fuck,â Minho murmurs to himself, leaning back against bricks and cement. His eyelids are heavy, his breath frozen, shoulders weighed down by an invisible force.Â
His dark lashes flutter up to stare at the falling snow, feeling their little frostbites against his chilling skin, and his eyes momentarily close for some sort of relief.Â
Minho simply needs to do his job properly, they say. All beings are equal, they say.Â
So who is he, when he doesnât do his job?
And who is he, to experience the excruciating throb like itâs a recurring lucid dream that he can never escape from?
Pain is always temporary. Minho knows exactly how it looks like, how it tastes, and how it pulses through his hollow bones. He can grit his teeth to endure. He used to do it all the time. But itâs the dull-phantom agony of a hundred swords piercing his chest and the neglect heâs grown numb to that still haunt him every night.Â
Just because he is immortal, they rammed their merciless blades through his body and drove their unsparing words into his skull. Over and over again. He couldnât fight back, that would mean going against the rules.Â
They broke him.Â
Hurt him.Â
Again. And again. And again.Â
He let them.Â
Until the infinite sky is painted the same shade of crimson as his two hands. Until the cursed shackles trace the lines of his wrists and neck like an unwanted scar. The chains imprinted on his skin have bound his physical abilities to those of a mere earthling for centuries now and almost every night he wants to cry out to someone.Â
He wants to be smallerâlesser, perhaps. Maybe if thereâs less of him in this life, there might be less of a problem.Â
âMinho.âÂ
One glance into his eyes and an entire lifetime flashes before your eyes.Â
âI will do as I please, use whichever methods I choose. It doesnât matter to me what they want. I will save you all without fail!â
âSomeoneâŠsave me. Please, come and save me!â
But then thereâs heartache and betrayal. Thereâs helplessness, bloodlust, and eternal darkness.Â
You see a dream of bringing salvation to the common people. You see a righteous halo that thousands used to look upon, forcibly placed their belief onto that light until it shattered under the impossible burden. Whatâs left behind is an everlasting silence, a fallen god without his believers, a heart beating with despair, and an immortal soul that yearns for death.Â
His courage. His anguish. His compassion. His resentment and hatred. His intuition and ignorance.Â
You want to understand them all.Â
âDid you get hurt?â
The world used to be a black void. Somehow, it becomes bright and smiles at him. Minho fights for every little detail in the smile, pushes his blurry consciousness to give it the right voice, and composes a small ray of light from his broken memories.Â
âTake a rest, Minho.âÂ
Minho lets a forgotten tear slide down his cheek when a soft piece of wool drapes itself around his exposed neck. His fingers tug at the material, slow and clumsy. He leans forward without a second thought, into the warm presence of safety. You sigh, hugging him closer so he can calm his breaths. Your embrace feels like washing the blood from his hands and waking up from a nightmare to the warm morning sun.Â
Here is a person who cares for him.Â
Here is a person who he can reach out to when he thinks such a thing as affection might not be fitting for his tainted soul.
Here is a person who makes him hope again even when his heart was too worn out to look for any validation. Your hug is tight, so very tight as if youâre willing to open your ribs and tuck the mess that is him inside, to keep him close and safe. The mess that is precious because a part of you is afraid that you might make him shatter if your touch is too desperate.Â
Minho still canât believe it because you donât let go and only hold him impossibly tighter. âAre youâŠis this-is this realâŠ?â
Your brow twitches in irritation. This fool⊠what the absolute fuckâŠ
In a moment of candid boldness, you push him away and smack him across the face in hopes of bringing him back to clarity. The haziness in his head eventually fades away, leaving him flabbergasted. Palm against a cheek, his skin and flesh flush hot and swollen. When was the last time someone got upset at him like this? When was the last time someone cared enough to put him back into his place? Frankly, Minho canât quite remember.Â
âDid it hurt?â
âYes.â His breath leaves him in a soft rush.Â
âThen I am real. All of this is real. Isnât that great?â
âYes.â Naturally, the tears keep coming.Â
âIf you dare to wander around deathâs door again for my sake, Iâll hit you twice. Got it?â
He doesnât respond. Only a small smile greets you under the beaming moonlight. A cold wind blows. You hold his teary gaze until your heart canât take it anymore and your hand reaches out to ruffle his hair.Â
The first step toward warmth takes him a lifetime of eight hundred years.Â
But itâs worth it because he is no longer alone.Â
Not to your surprise, Hyunjin is a lonely kid and immediately whines to his parents about setting up another playdate with Felix. You always know the brat would get attached quickly.Â
âYou got it?â
Minho shoves his hands into his pockets as he runs over things he shouldnât say in front of the kids for the last time. âYeah, youâve asked me for the fifth time already.â
âI canât trust an eight hundred-year-old man,â you smile and lean against the front door.Â
For some reason, he looks offended. âI have good memories. I can summarize the entire battle of Hwangsanbeol in five seconds. Try me.â
âIsnât that like common knowledge?â Your brows furrow. âPeople donât need to have a first-class certificate in Korean History to know that Baekje won.âÂ
His commiserating sigh reeks of disappointment. âY/N, sweetie. Kim Gwanchang sacrificed himself, helped Silla regain their morale, and made Kim Yushin victorious.â Whatever, you never liked the subject anyway.Â
The door is wide open for him now. Your lips curl up into a soft smile when your gazes collide, â...you know what, why donât you opt to be Hyunjinâs history tutor instead of a babysitter?â Itâs hard to break eye contact as he secretly thinks about how pretty your eyes are.Â
âDonât be a creep, Minho.âÂ
Minho nearly trips and falls on his face when Jisungâs voice echoes inside his head. âYouâre already talking too much.âÂ
âYou could have left me at home or something. No offense but your spine isnât the most ideal place to kick back.â
His lips wordlessly twitch in exasperation but he tries not to make a sound. He canât afford to let you witness the unhinged banter as if he hasnât freaked you out enough already. âHilarious.â
âWait until I tell an actual joke,â Jisung is glaring at him, he can feel it. âOoh, my bad. Thatâs you.â
âWhat a shame, Han. I guess youâre not hanging out with the kids today.â Minho raises his index finger and drags out a simple charm in thin air. Jisung instantly shuts up.
An exhale of relief and his gaze begins to roll around the Leeâs household. He almost gawks, literally. This isnât a house, itâs a fucking mansion. It gives him a hunch that this Felix brat must have steaks for breakfast on a daily basis. The kidâs family is definitely loaded.Â
The moment he sets foot into the living room, he gets assaulted. Well, thatâs mildly exaggerated. His leg gets assaulted. The culprit is no other than a familiar ball of fluff. It is barking at him with the level of energy that can easily surpass a toddler going through a sugar rush.Â
âWell, looks like Kkami didnât forget you,â you fail to suppress your laughter.Â
The said dog, Kkami, circles around him until they both get slightly dizzy, his tail wagging so hard Minho fears it might as well fall off. Reluctantly, he kneels down to pet his head because Kkami is practically ruining his new pair of jeans.Â
âHyunjin, this is Minho. He found Kkami and brought him home the other day for you,â you attempt to call Hyunjin over because Felix is already taking peeks at the new guest from behind your legs.Â
Minho gives him a finger-gun, âSup.â
Hyunjin pulls in a deep breath, shuffling from his position on the couch. Then he hops off the cushions, drags his feet on the tiled floor, and stares at the odd scenario while tugging at your finger. Heâs clearly unhappy that some random guy just walked into his life and took his puppyâs attention away from him.Â
âHey kid,â Minho flaps a hand. âCan Kkami do any cool tricks?â
Hyunjin scowls, âNo.âÂ
A mischievous brow flickers. âDo you want me to teach him for you?â
âNo. What do you want?âÂ
Never mind, kids arenât easy to deal with these days. Minho deliberately lets out a desperate sigh before pushing himself up, âWhat Iâm trying to say is I want to be your babysitter slash tutor slash puppy trainer if the last one is a real job that is.â
âYou canât do that many jobs at once,â Hyunjin replies snottily, very unconvinced.Â
âI can.â
Thereâs a split second where Minho looks somewhat ticked off, however, he recalls your words from earlier and replaces the frown with a forced smile. He walks up to Hyunjin, leans down to match his eye level, and tilts his head almost threateningly.Â
âIf you donât agree, I can just kidnap your dog.âÂ
You instinctively smack him on the back of his head. He wouldnât dare.Â
The usual shrug of carefreeness leaves his shoulders when you start staring daggers at him. The fact that he knows how to exorcise curses and demons but still lets you touch his weak point should really be enough of a hint about his liking for you. The cursed shackles are already there so heâs got nothing to lose anymore.Â
âYou wonât do that,â Hyunjin, to your surprise, retorts confidently. âBecause then you wonât get paid.â
âItâs your loss if you donât take me in.â Minho pulls away casually, he canât help but notice the longing gaze on the toddlerâs face. Kids are kids, they do get attached quickly. âIâm a full package,â he rightfully asserts. Itâs not unbelievable. A person can do a lot for a lifetime of eight hundred years. You wonât be surprised if he randomly becomes a flamethrower tomorrow and simultaneously starts his second career as a bartender during nightfall.Â
âYouâre just in it for the money.â Of course, Minho shamelessly nods at that. âYouâre kind of a little shit.â
Wait, pause.Â
âHyunjin, sweetheart,â you blink rigidly. âWhere did you learn that from?â The little rat turns away without a word while still grabbing at your shirt tightly. Silence really speaks more than words.Â
Felix raises his hand in a timid manner, âHe heard it when you stubbed your toe the other day.â And youâre already wondering where the nearest cliff is. Study reveals: you canât suffer if youâre dead.Â
The flat expression on Minhoâs face is having a hard time maintaining itself. It makes you want to throw him into a tank full of sharks. âIâd say that is reasonable. What are you supposed to say when you get hurt? A freaking prayer?âÂ
âSo what? Are we going to allow them to curse when they get hurt now?â you heave at him incredulously, âWhat if Felix curses at daycare and all the toddlers on the playground start slapping themselves in the face in order to use vulgar language?â
His brain gears pause for a moment. âWhat the fu...how do you know that?â
âI have many secrets.âÂ
âYeah, remind me not to mess with you?â
âReady to surprise Felix at daycare?â
Hyunjin jumps slightly in his seat in excitement, âYep!â
Right, did you mention that Mr. and Mrs. Lee have a thing for going on business trips unannounced? Naturally, Mrs. Hwang has no reason to not let Felix stay at their place until his parents come back. Poor kid, no wonder Hyunjinâs got such a soft spot for him.Â
So as soon as the bell rings, you decide to come and pick Hyunjin up for a short car ride. After all, heâs too smart to live under a rock all the time. You deeply despise unfulfilled potentials.Â
On a similar note, Minho still didnât get Hyunjinâs approval, which is reasonable.Â
However, because he is technically your new roommate and is jobless, he unconditionally follows you whenever youâre outside of classes. Truth be told, it feels like youâve brought home an attention-starved cat but hey, who are you to complain?Â
âAlsoâŠâ you drawl, side-eyeing the passenger seat. âWhatâs with the cold shoulder?âÂ
Minho doesnât even bother to glance at you, the audacity. âWhat cold shoulder?â
âThe one youâre giving me right now as we speak.âÂ
You like to reassure yourself that heâs too focused on admiring how clean your car is to respond. And truthfully, your car is clean and he does like it. Itâs the only metal box that heâs willing to sit in rather than teleporting himself.Â
Your car is pristine yet it doesnât have that awful smell of new cars. You always shove the old notepad full of mildly comprehensive grocery lists into the doorâs storage compartment and end up forgetting everything. If he glances back, thereâs the fluffy blanket you start keeping in the backseat in case he complains about the air conditioning. And then, the tiny, red sparrow keychain hung upon the rear-view mirror reminds you of Jisung which reminds you of him.Â
Minho would like to correct you that Jisung is a descendant of the vermillion bird, not a sparrow but he thinks it doesn't matter either way if you bought it because of him.Â
âIâd like to think that Iâm hot, not cold.âÂ
You chuckle, amused, âDid I accidentally offend you somehow? Hey, stop turning your back on people when theyâre talking to you!â
His face unknowingly flushes because he knows damn well his reasons might be too shallow. âWould you please just get off my back and shoulders?âÂ
âMinho, it was a harmless date,â Jisung supplies unhelpfully.Â
âBut she only got back in the middle of the night! I even made us dinner!â
âSeriously? I went missing for almost a week and you didnât even bother to look for me. What kind of a parental figure are you? Iâm feeling the need to report you for child abandonment.â
âSaying âI fucking hate youâ would have sufficed, Han.â
âBy the way, thanks for the food last night,â you scratch your cheek once you remind yourself of the hefty meal and a completely passed-out Minho on the couch. âIt was much better than the place we went to.âÂ
Youâre not upset with the date. You just thought it would be rude if you never gave the guy the chance when he didnât have any ill intentions. It was an average experience, youâd say. And was it worth a total of a two-hour drive? No, of course not.Â
âYeah?â Minho keeps gazing out the window. âIf thatâs the case, you should just stick to your type and not some random moron from uni.âÂ
You pout. You know that heâs right. âIâm sure itâs not possible to find someone whoâs good-looking, can cook, nice, and doesnât have the personality of a piece of white bread all at the same time.âÂ
Jisung instantly loses his absolute shit while Minhoâs complexion goes impossibly paler like youâve stuck four screwdrivers through his skull without mercy. The worst part? Only he has to go through the hysterical experience because the stupid bird is practically inhabiting his spine.Â
âAre you going to date a god?â Hyunjin perks up from the back seat.Â
And this time, you nearly crash the car.Â
Minhoâs shoulders are clearly shaking from laughing too hard. Jisung should be enjoying this, too. You can feel it.Â
Shakily, you take a moment to breathe while clutching the steering wheel. âNo, whyâd you say that?â
âThen you should lower your expectations.â
Why the hell are you being lectured by a nine-year-old? You want a fucking refund.Â
âOh look, there he is!â Hyunjin grabs your hand and drags you ahead.Â
âHey wait for meâugh!â Minho tried to trail after as quickly as he can but someone just slams into him with their entire body weight. âWhat the hell??âÂ
âOh, Iâm so sorry! Are you okay?â The young man shoots him a dimpled smile, offering him a hand and picking up the mess on the ground right after.Â
Minho only stares back at him from head to toe. Dark under circles, tired shoulders, a name tag that reads âBang Chanâ, and a box full of colorful books. It is most likely that he works at this daycare place. âYeah, Iâm good. Just be careful next time,â he replies dryly, eyes already darting elsewhere to look for you.Â
âYou too!â Chan flashes one last smile before running off. If Minho is being honest, itâs kinda hard to get mad at him because he looks like any amount of his sanity has already been thrown out the window about three years ago.Â
His gaze spontaneously stops dead on the concrete before him and there lies a small storybook. âSo what? Do I have to return this, too?â
âUh-huh. Try and act decently for once, itâs not that hard,â Jisung suggests.Â
And obviously, Minho has no excuse to reject it. He just needs to find you first. Youâre better at socializing than he is after all.Â
But when Minho pushes his way through the glass door, the first thing he sees is Felix and another kid being surrounded by three different grownupsâone of which he recognizes is Chan.Â
The daycare is relatively empty because itâs already past the working hour. Felix and the other kid have tears trailing down their cheeks, though Felixâs eyes are somewhat bright knowing that he has nothing to be afraid of.Â
Hyunjin himself is heaving like heâs absolutely enraged. If it werenât for you holding him tightly to your side, things would have escalated very quickly.Â
âMy brotherâs storybook is gone! And who was helping you two clean up after playing hour today?â The furious girl your age glares at Chan and his colleague.Â
Felix lifts his head and faces her glare head-on. âI-I did.â
âSo where is Senjuâs storybook?â
âI already put it inside the box! I promise-â
âBut itâs not there, is it?â She crosses her arms and glances at her brother whoâs bawling his eyes out every now and time before scoffing. âYou know what, this isnât even worth it. Apologize to Senju and Iâll let this go.âÂ
Felix lowers his head this time, trying his best to hold back his tears. âBut I did nothing wrong!â
With a deep breath, Minho walks toward your side and places a warm hand on your shoulder. You peer at him sideways at the contact, your eyes clearly burning with cold rage. This only adds to his panic. Great. Now what?
âMinho.â
âYes?â He jumps a little at your voice.Â
You push Hyunjin toward his side and curl your fists. âStay here with Hyunjin. This shouldnât take too long.â
For a second there, Minho has absolutely no idea what to do. Kids are crying. The grownups are mad. The daycare employees are incredulously useless. And he knows better than to let you go near that woman because the minute you approach her, heâs sure that youâre out for blood. Not literally but still.Â
âSet one priority only. Felix.â Jisung helps him knock on wood before you can walk away.Â
Those words snap him back to clarity instantly. âNo, you stay here,â Minho says firmly and grabs your wrist. âItâs fine, Y/N. You donât have to do anything.â
To his dismay, you stare back at him dead in the eye. âWell if what that girl is doing to Felix is fine, then I guess second-degree murder is also fine.â
âWhat are you gonna do? Kill her with a stuffed toy?â
âI can try.â
âNoâ!â
âIâm just going to talk to her, I swear.â
âYou were literally planning her murder.â
âNo, I am just going to unalive her.â
âYou whatââ
âExcuse me, youâre not letting me talk. I was the one who carried the boxes.â Chan rubs a stiff finger on his temple before exhaling. âAnd it is actually Senjuâs turn today to be on cleaning duty. Felix was never obligated to help us in the first place.âÂ
The girl gasps aloud, âOh? So now youâre putting the blame on my brother?â
The brunet named Seungmin finally speaks up, pushing Felix behind his legs, âWe deeply apologize for what happened. Howeverââ
âI donât need your apology. Itâs him who needs to apologize,â she cuts him off and points a finger at Felix in accusation. Surprisingly, you have not heard one audible sob from the kid, though the quiver of his shoulders tells you that heâs at his limit.Â
Felix may have done nothing wrong but heâs still just a kid. An adult on the verge of exploding will make any toddler go stiff. However, even if Felix did accidentally drop the storybook somewhere, she has no right to talk him down like that. He wasnât even on duty today.Â
Did you mention that you wanted to unalive her?
You take a breath. âHey, you fucking waste of oxyââ
Minho panics and clasps a hand over your mouth. You then shoot him a warning look that lets him know if he doesnât let you go in the next three seconds, youâre going to make him.Â
He shakes his head gently, giving you a long and silent stare. Your anger melts at the tenderness, your tense shoulders slowly loosen up. âFine. Go.âÂ
With a deep inhale, Minho walks over to the commotion, his expression unwavering as every eye in the room pins him into place. Other kidsâ in daycare hushed whispers can be heard and itâs clearly affecting Felix more than it should. He needs to end this quickly.Â
âAnd you,â Seungmin exhales tiredly as if another disaster has struck. âWhat do you want?â
Minhoâs eyes stop dead in their tracks at the name tag. âKim Seungmin.â
Before the latter can get any say in this abrupt conversation, Minho swiftly grabs him by the collar, sucks in a sharp breath, and slams his head against the poor guyâs skull with an impact strong enough for a mild concussion.Â
You almost choke on blood. âWhat-What the hell do you think youâre doing?!â
The pale look on the girlâs face is priceless. You could have laughed if you werenât so shocked yourself.Â
âOh my god, Seungmin! Are you okay?!â Chan freaks out and holds his stumbling colleague by the shoulders. He whips his head up to meet eyes with the culprit pointedly. âJust so you know..violence is absolutely unacceptable. What possessed you into doing such a-â
âIs this the storybook that youâre looking for?â Minho holds up the book in front of his face.Â
Seungmin regains his awareness and squints at the vibrant hardcover with slightly disoriented vision. Accepting the book with one hand while the other on his head, he lifts a brow. âYeah, thatâs the one⊠Wait, why do you have it?â
The flat expression remains on Minhoâs face, his head motioning toward a very confused Chan. âHe bumped into me and dropped it.âÂ
Naturally, awkward apologies are exchanged. Minho instantly wants to bury himself but decides to stay so Felix can hold his hand through the process. He isnât appalled at all when Senjuâs older sister chooses not to say a single word. So his rationality tells him to do what he does best.Â
âFelix, listen.â Minho kneels down to meet his eye level. âNext time a bad grownup accuses you of doing things that you didnât do, you tell them to kindly shut the fuck up and walk away because you donât owe them shit. Okay?âÂ
Felix sniffles one last time and breaks into a big smile. âOkay!â
Minhoâs face falls crooked at Hyunjinâs intense stare in the rearview mirror. âWhy are you staring at me like that?â
âYou were making a total fool of yourself,â the kid stabs a finger his way and averts his gaze completely, embarrassment flushing his cheeks.Â
âWhat was that?â Minho grins back like the sly bastard he is.Â
You shrug from the driverâs seat. âHe said you were looking kinda cool.â
âWait, so if you had the book the entire time, why did you have to headbutt the poor guy?â Jisung pops up in realization.Â
Minho only purses his lips. âHis face pisses me off.â
âI never said anything like that!â Hyunjin finally stops whining in his seat after a long beat of silence. âFine! Iâll ask my parents to let you babysit me.â
The crystalline joy in his eyes is so obvious that you almost wheeze at his effort of trying to hide it. Minho exchanges a small look with you, internally screaming with all his might that heâs finally, finally not jobless anymore. At least for the next few months. Working while being able to be with you is more than enough.
âUnder one condition.â Hyunjin holds up a finger.Â
And never mind. Minho almost forgets this kid is constantly opposed to anything remotely related to him for no apparent reason at all.Â
âYou said youâre really smart right? Whenever I have a question, I want you to answer it honestly. And you donât get to call my questions stupid.â
Oh, thatâd be easy then.Â
A wave of lighthearted chuckles bursts from his lips. âOkay done. Thereâs no such thing as a stupid question.âÂ
âCan you answer my questions, too?â Felix raises his hand expectantly.Â
âSure. No problem.â
Hyunjin doesnât have to hesitate anymore. âOkay, I have a question. Do you believe in gods?âÂ
You and Minho simultaneously tense up. Concern begins rooting inside your rib cage because this is a relatively sensitive topic to him. Having the kids talk about it too much might be equivalent to playing with fire.Â
âWhy do you ask?â Minho tries to keep his voice from snapping.Â
To his surprise, Hyunjinâs eyes glow with awe, bright and pure. âBecause when I was praying for Kkami to come home at night, someone really brought him back to me the next day. I wasnât praying to anyone in particular but I felt like someone was listening to my prayer. I believe someone was watching over me all night. The only person who could go through all that work for me without any complaints must be a god, right?âÂ
It melts and breaks Minhoâs heart altogether.Â
His gaze meets yours again. The oncoming tears are making it hard to see what kind of expression youâre making. He is absolutely stricken but letting one droplet fall will make him blanch with shame. When his brain tries to come up with something cutting and clever as a response, his tongue clams up. Speechless.Â
âThe kid does have some range. Good to know.â Jisung lets out a discreet exhale, not knowing whether this warmth in his chest is coming from himself or Minho.Â
âGods do exist, Hyunjin,â you speak up after the prolonged stillness. âThey might not be able to do everything but they are always trying their best no matter what.â
Minho eventually lets out a laugh; his chest feels so light and content. âSheâs right. Gods do exist.âÂ
âI have a question, too!â Felix wags his fists in excitement.Â
âWhat is it?â
âAre you in love?â
You donât intend to crash the car but being able to operate the vehicle normally is going to be a complicated task.Â
oh for those kiss prompts can i request chan + kisses for comfort?
comfort kiss â b. chan
content/warning(s): chan breaking down :(, flufffyyyyyyy
note: chan always gives the hugs. i think it's time for him to receive a hug. send me a request if you waaant <3
it was overwhelming. chan was way past the due dates he have set for himself to finish the needed tracks. It wasn't that someone was rushing himâwell, there was one: him. chan brushes his hand through his hair as he leans his head against his hand. he was on the verge of crying, but he held it not wanting to show weakness even though no one was there.
but he heard soft taps on his door, so he sits up straight trying to compose himself as if he wasn't just breaking down a little while ago. it was probably one of the boys and it was no time to show weakness, chan thinks. he hears the door open so he keeps working, editing the track.
chan hears the door close softly but no voice speaks up so he turns his chair lightly and sees you on the door leaning as you look at him. "hi, baby." you mumble, pulling your lips into a thin line. you push yourself from the door, walking to chan who just stares at you. he knows that you know what was happening a little while ago. he doesn't know how but he is thankful that minutes before he says anything, you already know what's happening. "you wanna rest or sleep, maybe?" you tease lightly and chan couldn't help but laugh lightly.
"says you." chan says, trying to turn it around but he knows it wouldn't work. it never does. just one look from you and he leans back on his chair, looking at particularly nothing. "i wasn't able to chase my deadline."
"your deadline." you repeat and chan nods. you sigh, about to sit on the back of your ankles when your boyfriend pulls you on his lap. "i know that this is one of the ways for you to get working and all," you start as chan looks at you. "but.. you should give yourself a break, baby." you say, kissing his nose. "give yourself some credit," a kiss on the forehead. "you've done great, channie." on the cheeks. "and you will do greater as time passes by."
gently, you leave soft pecks all over his face which he gladly accepts as he closes his eyes to savor the moment. "you're so great." you mumble and chan smiles, looking into your eyes. "you don't have to beat yourself up for nothing." you say with a smile, cupping his jaw. "you're so good." you say, kissing his cheeks as you trails your kisses all over his face which makes him giggle loudly.
chan puts his hands on your wrists, spulling away lightly. "thank you, love." he says and you kiss his forehead. "ah, i love you." chan warmly says, feeling his chest full of love for you as he opens his arms. you wrap your arms around his torso, placing a kiss on his cheek.
â pairing: han jisung x reader
â genre: humor, angst, fake dating au, soundcloud rapper au
â word count: 24k
â warnings: alcohol consumption, explicit language, jisung is dumb... like actually an idiot. this is the idiots to lovers that you didnât know you needed. some good olâ slow burn, which iâm sure is obvious because this is a fucking beast but it must be noted, so iâm going on the record here... yes this did take me an entire year to write, no i am not proud of it but here we are. i hope you enjoy?
â description: for the past year, youâve had a big fat crush on the (very) oblivious han jisung. youâve dreamt about dating him⊠you just never imagined that when it finally happened, you would be the last to find out. or, jisung, in all his glorious idiocy, decides that the two of you faking a relationship is the solution to all his problems. (he, of course, conveniently forgets to let you know about it.)
At 10:30am on a Saturday morning, halfway through midterm season, you find yourself studying hopelessly at home by candle light.
You know how it soundsâstudying, on a Saturday, in the morning? Just because youâre a struggling college student doesnât mean you donât have standards.
Except, at this point in the semester, youâre getting desperate, and all your standards are quickly going out the window. With exams and deadlines piling up, youâre barely hanging on, and itâs all you can do to not drown under the sheer amount of work you have to complete within the next week.
If youâre being honest, youâve probably been wearing the same hoodie and leggings for the past three days, and you canât quite remember the last time you had a proper mealâyou know, one that consists of more than hot cheetos and gatorade. For the last week, youâve bounced back and forth between your apartment, the library, and your classes like a ball inside a pinball machine, and you can feel your will to live slowly disintegrating as time passes.
As an anthropology major at a university renowned for their liberal arts programs, your curriculum is challengingâand although it is undeniable that you love what youâre studying, sometimes it can get a bit much.
Itâs usually around this time in the semester, actually, that you begin to regret your life choices.
Choices like deciding it would be a good idea to study by candlelight.
In your defense, though, you donât really have many options. Not since the storm last night that knocked out the power in your building, anyways. Your landlord promised it would all be up again by tomorrow, but you need to study (like, today)Â and well... Letâs just say the tiny windows in your apartment make a jail cell look like a resort.
Youâre pouring over your archaeology textbook miserably when your phone chimes, startling you out of your reverie.
You fumble for your phone, eagerly dropping the pen you had been previously holding, and your best friendâs name flashes across the screen as you unlock it.
[10:37am] hyunjin:Â y/n r u up yet
[10:37am] hyunjin:Â wait, dumb question. ofc u are
You almost groan when you read the messages, blinking blue across your LED screen.
You love Hyunjin, you really do. As his best friend, you donât really have much of a choice in that manner actually. But you canât help the dread that washes over you at his message.
Because the thing about Hyunjin is that he has a knack for coming up with harebrained ideas and half baked schemes, and alwaysâalways, no matter how hard you tryâmanages to rope you into them too, regardless of whether or not you have more important things to be doing.
[10:45am] hyunjin:Â i can see u reading the msgs!! respond to me!!!!
[10:45am] you:Â fuck
[10:45am] you:Â i thought i had my read receipts off??
[10:46am] hyunjin:Â u did
[10:46am] hyunjin:Â i turned them back on đ
[10:48am] you:Â bitch
[10:48am] hyunjin:Â mayb if u answered my texts i wouldnât have to turn them on huh
[10:49am] you:Â wtvr đ
[10:49am] you:Â what do u want?
[10:50am] hyunjin:Â come over
[10:52am] you:Â look i know iâm hot and all but
[10:52am] hyunjin:Â what
[10:52am] hyunjin:Â OH EW NO
[10:53am] hyunjin: why would u ever say that đ€ą
[10:53am] hyunjin:Â iâm out of ur league pls
[10:54am] you:Â u mean IâM out of UR league
[10:54am] hyunjin:Â no i said what i said
[10:55am] hyunjin:Â but NO this is not why i texted u
[10:55am] hyunjin:Â some of the guys r coming over so u should come 2
[10:56am] you:Â canât, have 2 study
[10:57am] hyunjin:Â it wasnât a question
[10:58am] hyunjin:Â cmoooon y/n youâve literally been killing urself over midterms
[10:58am] hyunjin:Â pls. i havenât seen u in like a week :(
[10:59am] you:Â yea cuz unlike u i actually want to PASS
[10:59am] you:Â shouldnât u be studying too??????
[11:00am] hyunjin:Â pfft, studying is for losers
[11:00am] hyunjin:Â when was the last time u left ur apartment anyways
[11:01am] hyunjin:Â ur brain is gonna liquefy soon!!!!!
[11:01am] hyunjin:Â pls :((((( i think u can take a break for an hour at least :(
[11:03am] you:Â srry canât hear u over the sound of archeomagnetism and dendrochronology
[11:04am] hyunjin:Â did i mention jisung is gonna be home
At the mention of his roommate, you tense up.
Because hereâs the thingâhis roommate, Han Jisung? Youâve known him almost as long as youâve known Hyunjin, and there are a few undeniable facts about him.
Like how heâs really loud, kind of annoying, maybe even a little bit of an idiot. But if heâs an idiot, you must be an even bigger one, because youâve had a big fat crush on him for a long time.
A really long time.
On the upper side of 2 years kind of long time. And the thing is, you arenât even the kind of person whoâs good at hiding these kinds of things. You think the only reason he hasnât figured out is because of how oblivious he is, because you arenât very discreet. Hyunjin caught on over a year ago, and he never fails to use it as emotional blackmail.
But youâre not so whipped that you would drop everything at the chance to see him, okay... Youâre not!
Still, your heart beats a little faster as you fumble to type out a response.
[11:08am] you:Â okay, and?
[11:09am] hyunjin:Â oh, nothing~
You can hear his teasing singsong in your ear, like a tick you canât shake off, and youâre not sure whether you want to smack him over the head or kick him in the shin moreâprobably both.
[11:11am] hyunjin:Â listen, i know ur stressed over this archaeology midterm
[11:11am] hyunjin:Â but i need my weekly y/n fix sooo
[11:13am] hyunjin:Â if ur not here in half an hour iâm gonna beat ur ass
[11:16am] you:Â u think that scares me?
[11:16am] you:Â iâd like to see u TRY
[11:18am] hyunjin:Â well if ur not coming... i guess iâll just...
[11:18am] hyunjin:Â tell jisung all ur embarrassing secrets
[11:19am] hyunjin:Â maybe iâll start with the waffle house incident from freshman year?
[11:20am] hyunjin:Â pls come over :((( we can play mario kart :(((
[11:20am] hyunjin: iâll even play toad h- đ€ątoad harbo- đ€ą
[11:21am] you: Mrssage read at 11:21am â
[11:22am] hyunjin:Â BITCH IS THAT A TYPO
[11:22am] hyunjin:Â TOAD HARBOR IS DISGUSTING IâM WILLING TO SACRIFICE A LOT 4 U
[11:24am] you: Message read at 11:21am â
[11:25am] hyunjin:Â ITS NOT EVEN 11:21 ANYMORE???
[11:27am] you: Message read at 11:27am â
In the end, though, it doesnât take much for you to cave.
You would like to make it expressly clear that your decision to take a break has absolutely nothing to do with Han Jisung, and instead has more to do with the fact that Hyunjin (as infuriatingly annoying as he is) was right when he said your brain would liquefy soon if you donât leave the house.
After all, you have been studying your ass off for the past two weeks, and maybe a little break would give you a chance to refocus. And, although you arenât going over in the hopes of seeing Jisung... Well, it couldnât hurt, right?
So, with the intent to stay for two hours, max (you do have a little self control, after all), you find yourself at Hyunjinâs building.
The building that he lives in has thin walls, and the moment you step onto the landing of their floor, you can hear the faint sound of the Mario Kart theme and some very aggressive yelling echo down the hall.
It gets louder as you round the corner, and you can vaguely make out someone telling Hyunjin to âsuck it, frogface!â by the time you arrive at his door. Shaking your head slightly, you lift your hand to knock, but before you get too far, the door swings open.
âY/N!â Hyunjin exclaims brightly, the grin on his face faltering as he looks you up and down.
âWow. You look...â
âAmazing?â You respond dryly. âI know.â
He raises a brow. âI was going to say like you havenât showered in a week or slept in two, but okay.â
You narrow your eyes and then punch himâbecause, yeah, itâs true, but that doesnât mean he should say it anyways.
âYeah, well, whatever,â you grumble. You canât help but feel a bit jealous as you take in his appearance: clean and fresh and like heâs actually slept in a bed recently.
You and Hyunjin are both anthropology majorsâitâs how you met, actually. Freshman year and he was one of the only people you could stand, mostly because of your shared love for dinosaur bones and aversion to large groups of people.
And yet, despite carrying the same course load for the past two years, he always seemed to manage it better than you ever could.
You donât really understand it, like... At all. Itâs like one of the mysteries of the modern worldâhow Hwang Hyunjin manages to ace his classes with flying colors while simultaneously not knowing the difference between Paris, France and Paris Hilton.
âAre you going to let me in?â You ask pointedly and he opens his mouth, probably to say something snarky back, but promptly shuts it when you shoot a glare at him.
Wordlessly, he holds the door open for you, and you step into the apartment.
âGuys,â he calls out and your eyes land on Jisung and your two mutual friends, Felix and Seungmin, as you walk into the living room. âGuess who finally decided to show up!â
âHey Y/N,â Seungmin smiles slightly as you flop onto the couch next to him with a sigh. Felix and Jisung both grunt in your general direction, but they seem too consumed with what looks like an intense game of Mario Kart to do much more.
âHyunjin threatened you into coming over too?â You ask as you shrug off your sweater, and Seungmin snorts.Â
âYeah, something like that,â he says back lightly. âWere you studying?â
âYes,â you wallow, âbut... Here I am despite my better judgement. What about you?â
âI donât really have much work this weekend,â Seungmin replies. âOther than, you know...â
He holds up the worn book in his hands and you groan.
âLucky... I wish I was a literature major.â
âJisung, did you just red shell me?!â Felix exclaims, aghast, and your attention shifts to the TV.
âAnd if I did?â Jisung responds smugly, his eyes trained on the illuminated screen.
Felix narrows his eyes. âI mean, thatâs what this blue shell is for, I guess.â
âFuck,â Jisung curses as heâplaying as baby Peachâgets bombed, and Felix (baby Daisy) speeds past.
âLanguage!â You chide instinctively. âThere are children here...â
âSorry!â Jisung spares a glance at you, a cheesy and apologetic grin stretched across his face, and your heart skips a beat.
Your cheeks heat up and he tilts his head curiously to the side, as if heâs about to say something moreâand then the moment passes as Hyunjin chimes from the kitchen, âdonât talk about Felix like that.â
You turn in his direction and try your best to deadpan, but your face still feels warm and the words almost catch in your throat.
âI was talking about you,â you childishly stick out your tongue, and felix reaches over for a quick high five without looking away from the screen.
âY/N,â Jisung complains distractedly. âYou canât take Felixâs side. You were my friend first!â
âSorry,â you say as nonchalantly as you can. âMaybe if you were winning, but...â
âYouâre not,â Hyunjin pipes up helpfully as he slouches down in between you and Seungmin, and you nod in agreement.
âWhat he said.â
Jisung sticks up his middle finger at the two of you. You and Hyunjin, ignoring him, fist bump.
It takes a few more minutes (precisely three more courses, including Moo Moo Farm and Yoshi Fallsâseriously, who gets 12th in Yoshi Falls?)Â before Jisung throws down the controller in defeat, a groan leaving his lips.
âYouâre cheating anyways,â he scoffs, crossing his arms as he turns away from Felix stubbornly.
He looks like a child, and you and Hyunjin burst into laughter as Felix ignores him, breaking out into a very... interesting victory dance as he chants âI beat you!â over and over again.
Seungmin rolls his eyes at their childish antics and Hyunjin keels over, almost falling off the couch as Felix begins doing something reminiscent of the chicken dance. You pull out your phone with no hesitation and open Snapchat, unwilling to pass up the opportunity for blackmail material.
âI won,â Felix crows, and Jisung waves him off, annoyed.Â
âYeah, we know.â
Felix jumps back on the cushions next to him and looks at him expectantly. âSo, âfess up. What have you been hiding from us?â
âWhat, did he feed Minhoâs cats fish food again?â You ask, raising an eyebrow.
âOkay, that was one time,â Jisung complains immediately, âand you know how confusing the label is! Both of them have pictures of fishes on them, how was I supposed to know the difference between the cat food and the fish food?â
He pouts, and you look away quicklyâeven when heâs upset, he still looks cute.
âBy reading the label,â Hyunjin says plainly. âYou know, like an actual functioning adult.â
âBold of you to assume heâs functioning. Or an adult,â Seungmin pipes up.
âOkay,â Jisung scoffs. âIs it, like, national bully Han Jisung day?â
âIt doesnât have to be when you make it so easy,â Felix shrugs.
Jisung looks around helplessly, and when his eyes meet yours, you just purse your lips.
âLook, Iâm not saying heâs right,â you begin,â but if the shoe fits...â
He pouts again, and you cough as your breath gets caught in your throat.
âOkay, but seriouslyââ you begin, desperate to change the topic before he does something even more adorable and you just spontaneously combust on the spot.
ââWhat are you hiding? If itâs a dead body, I can help, but youâll have to give me a few hours.â
âItâs not,â Jisung shudders, âbut the fact that you are so prepared for that possibility makes me absolutely terrified.
You grin at him sweetly. âAs you should be.â
âY/N, please donât kill anyone,â Hyunjin begs. âPlease, not again.â
âAgain?â Jisung coughs, aghast. The four of you collectively ignore him.
âOkay, so if itâs not the fish food thing, or a dead body, then what did he do?â You ask Felix.
âHmm, I wonder what it could be?â Felix says sarcastically, turning to pointedly stare at Jisung. âWould you like to, I donât know, share with the group?â
âShare? W-What?â Jisung asks, suddenly nervous. HIs ears are flushed, and you can see the sweat forming on his brow. âI have nothing to hide!â
Any semblance of conviction vanishes when his voice cracks on the last word, and you snort.
âWell, now we definitely believe you,â Seungmin says dryly.
Felix rolls his eyes. âAccording to Yuna, thatâs not true.â
âYuna?â You interrupt, slightly confused. âLike... Yuna, my roommate Yuna? Changbinâs cousin, Yuna?â
âYes, Y/N,â Felix sighs. âDo we know any other Yuna?â
âOh.â You pause for a moment. âI suppose not. Well, you can continue.â
âW-whoâs Yuna?â Jisung stutters and his voice pitches upwards. Much to your chagrin, you canât help but note once again how cute he looks...
âJisung, youâve literally been friends with Yuna since you were kids,â Hyunjin deadpans.
â...I donât have friends!â
âYou wonât after this...â Felix sighs again, exasperated as he turns to you.
âY/N, you said something about knowing how to hide a dead body?â
You raise a brow. âAre you doubting me?â
â...No.â
âThatâs what I thought,â you nod smugly.
âWhatever Yuna told you, sheâs lying,â Jisung declares finally, after a moment of silence.
Felix scoffs.
âSo youâre saying that you didnât tell Yuna about some secret girlfriend you have, that you conveniently forget to tell any of us about?â
You must be really tired from all the studying earlier, you think to yourself,, because if you didnât know any better, you would swear you just heard him say Jisung and girlfriend in the same sentence, unironically...
Jisung, the idiot who after a year and a half of pining, still hasnât realized how you feel about him. Jisung, the thick headed dummy who literally can never take a hint, and somehow has the worst track record with girls despite how attractive and funny he is.
Hyunjin snorts, voicing your thoughts. âGirlfriend? Who would date Jisung?â
Well, you would, but youâre not about to say that out loud...
âThatâs what Iâve been trying to figure out!â Felix hisses as he turns to glare at Hyunjin, whoâs jaw drops open in response.
âWait, youâre being serious?â
Thereâs a strange feeling that starts to rise in your throat. Itâs almost like a bitternessâbut the kind that burns, and a knot tightens in the pit of your stomach. Your body feels hot, almost as if fire is coursing through your veins.
Is he being serious?
âYes, Hyunjin, obviously,â Felix groans.
His words are like a knife in your stomach, and you almost forget how to breathe.
âWell... I mean...â Jisung begins slowly, his eyes flitting around the room, and Felix punches him.
âI will call Yuna right now.â
That shuts Jisung up, and he sits that, pouting like a wounded baby.
But he doesnât deny it, and your throat tightens. Your body feels like its overheating and you think you might vomitâis this what jealousy feels like? You swallow, and your tongue scrapes against the roof of your mouth like sandpaper.
âSo Yuna doesnât know who it is?â Hyunjin asks skeptically.
âNo,â Jisung rolls his eyes, âbecause there is no one. She must have heard wrong.â
And he sounds convincingâpartly because his voice stays steady as he says it, but also because you want it to be true. But you know Yuna. Sheâs blunt and straightforward and sometimes a little mean, but as long as you have known her, sheâs never told a lie. SHe hates bullshit, so you know Felix is telling the truth.
âHow could she have heard wrong?â Felix cries. âNothing rhymes with âI have a girlfriend!ââ
âNot nothing,â Jisung reasons, but heâs quickly shut up by the pillow Hyunjin snatches from your grasp to throw at him.
âWeâre going to find out one way or another,â Seungmin reasons, âso you might as well tell us now.â
âWellâI mean, thereâs notââ Jisung splutters, and you can feel how frantic he is. How much he doesnât want to talk about this.
Well, that makes two of you.
Felix opens his mouth, looking like he is about to protest, but you canât take it anymoreâyou have to change the topic, and quick.
âOkay ladies,â you clap your hands together dramatically and all attention turns to you temporarily, the words dying on Felixâs tongue. âThis has been fun and all, but can we wrap this up? If he says heâs not dating anyone, then he isnât. Plus, I have 30 minutes left of my break, and I believe someone promised me some Toad Harbor action.â
âAre you challenging me?â Hyunjin quirks a brow, and any thoughts of Jisung and his mysterious girlfriend are forgotten.
Bless boys and their short attention spans...
âAnd if I am?â You throw back half-heartedly.
He scoffs, flexing his fingers. âOh, youâre on.â
âWell, would you look at the time!â Jisung glances down at his bare wrist, tapping it as if a watch is there. âI should be going now...â
Felix scowls at him. âWhat do you meaââ
Jisung catches your gaze, mouthing a quick âthank you,â before he jumps up from where he is sitting and makes a break for his room. He manages to get inside and slam the door shut before Felix gets the chance to wedge his way in, and there is a distinct click of a lock as Felix bangs on the door angrily.
âHan Jisung, this is not over,â he says murderously.
Jisung doesnât respond, and Felix, glowering, slinks back to the couch.
Hyunjin, who seems to not give a fuck about it, throws you the spare controller and willingly selects Toad Harbor (the worst course, in his opinion, but his opinions are often wrong.) You finish the race in first placeâobviouslyâbut the entire game, your head swims with thoughts of Jisung and his mystery girlfriend.
Youâre not sure when or why you started liking Han Jisung. Your feelings for him werenât something you expectedâthere wasnât one grand gesture that captured your heart or one particular instance you can remember that decided it for you.
Itâs just, one day you started to notice the little thingsâlike, how when he laughs, he has a habit of hitting whoever is nearest to him because he laughs so hard. How when he tells a joke, he tells it with his whole body: his words, his hands, his face. How when heâs out eating with anybody, he always makes sure everyone else has started eating before he does. How heâs not the best at putting his emotions into words, but while he might be boisterous and loud, when it comes down to it, heâs a really good listener.
And then, you started to realize other things too. Like how you unconsciously look for him everywhere you goâhow your heart beats a little bit faster when heâs around, and when heâs not, an unshakeable pit of disappointment weighs your stomach down.
Thatâs when you knew you were absolutely and totally fucked.
Developing feelings for Jisung wasnât very memorable, but meeting him for the first time... Thatâs a different story.
It happened a little more than halfway through the first semester of your freshman year, on one fine Wednesday night when Hyunjin happened to forget his lab notebook in his dorm (like the absolute dolt he is) twenty minutes before said lab began.
He calls you, panicked, begging you to get it for him. He doesnât have time to make it to his dorm and back in time, and his TA is an ass whoâs policy is that every lab session you show up late to, your grade drops a letter. Heâs near tears on the phone, blubbering on and on about how much heâll owe you if you do this one thing for himâso of course, out of the kindness of your heart, you begrudgingly agree to bring his notebook to him.
âYes, Hyunjin,â you sigh into the phone that is wedged between your shoulder and your ear as you pull your sneakers onto your feet. âI know where your room is. Yes, I know from theâI donât know, hundreds of times Iâve come over?â
You pause.
âYes, I heard you. The blue one. Yes, okay, I got it. Can you stop stressing? Iâll be there in fifteen minutes, okay?â
He starts to say something more, but knowing him, itâs probably just more complaining, so you hang up before he can give himself another panic attack. The line disconnects with a beep and you step out of your room, heading towards the nearest stairwell.
Hyunjin is just lucky that you both happen to live in the same dorm building, you think to yourself wryly as you begin to hike up from the 2nd floor to the 5th, where he lives.
Itâs only 3 floors, but youâre still winded by the time you make it up, and you take a moment to catch your breath and curse your weak lungs before you continue down the hall towards Hyunjinâs room.
The two of you are so close that you spend almost every waking moment together, but despite it, you never really spend much time in Hyunjinâs dorm. Itâs a combination of the facts that he has a bit of a cleanliness problem, and that your dorm happens to be less stairs to climbâwhich sounds like an absurd excuse, but when you consider that the elevators seem to be out of service every other week, actually makes quite a bit of sense.
As such, you havenât met his roommate yet. Youâve heard stories of the elusive Han Jisung from Hyunjin, as well as your other mutual friends Seungmin and Changbin, but he might as well be a ghost for how many times youâve actually seen him.
When you arrive at room #5014, decorated with cute little postcards by Hyunjinâs endearing RA, Chan, you donât hesitate before grabbing the handle and swinging the door open. You might not spend much time in his room, but youâve definitely visited on enough occasions to know that (despite your best efforts) Hyunjin has a bad habit of leaving his door unlocked.
You canât count how many times youâve scolded him for it, but his reasoning is that nobody wants to steal from a broke college student and, well, you canât really argue with that.
Youâve barely taken a step into the room before a high pitched shriek pierces your ears, and you jump in fright when you see a tall and very blond figure cowering on in the left corner of the room.
Itâs only when your eyes meet his wide and terrified gaze that you match his scream.
âWho are you?!â You demand immediately, your hands fisted and thrown out defensively in front of you. âWhat are you doing here? Are you trying to steal from Hyunjin? He doesnât have anything worth stealing, if thatâs what youâre trying to do!â
âWho am I? Who are you?! And why would I want to steal from Hyunjin?â
âWhy should I answer you?â You challenge. âYouâre the one trying to steal from a poor, unsuspecting college student!â
He gapes at you.
âHe doesnât have anything worth stealing, anyways! Just... this?â You trail off, confused as you pick up a small metal frying pan from the mess of his desk.
âIââ The boy begins, but you thrust the frying pan in his direction threateningly.
âWho are you?â You repeat. âAnd before you answer, you should know I have pepper spray and I am not afraid to use it.â
âWoah there, Rapunzel!â He throws his arms up in surrender. âIâm Jisung! Hyunjinâs roommate.â
You pause, slowly lowering your arms.
âOh.â Then, as realization hits you:Â âOh.â
A wave of embarrassment washes over you, and you clear your throat as you try to play off your fighting stance as a really, really awkward hair tuckâwhich turns out to be even more challenging than you anticipated, considering the fucking frying pan in your hands.
âYes. Well, that would make sense.â
He stares at you, his eyes narrowed, and you roll your bottom lip anxiously between your teeth.
âWell. Um, Iâm Y/N.â You offer awkwardly as you try to set the frying pan down as inconspicuously as you can.
Even as you do, his bewildered gaze never leaves you, and you wince at the loud clang the pan makes as you set it down.
âOh,â he says a bit lately, and you see recognition flash across his face. âY/N, youâre Hyunjinâs archaeology friend. Right?â
âYup,â you say, popping the p and immediately regretting it afterwards. âThatâs me.â
His mouth forms a small, soundless âoâ but doesnât say anything more, which you take as your cue to continue.
âI, um, didnât mean to barge in like this. I just thought, you know, that you wouldnât be here... I swear I donât just randomly barge into peopleâs rooms! Hyunjin just left his lab notebook, and he needed someone to get it for him, so... here I am,â you ramble.
âOf course he would forget to mention that his roommate would be here,â you mutter to yourself.
âHuh?â He asks, confused, and you perk up.
âI was just saying that again, Iâm really sorry for barging in on you like this.â
You pause.
âOh, and, um, for accusing you of being a thief...â
âItâs alright?â He says awkwardly, unsure how to proceed. âI mean, itâs not the first time someone has come in randomly, so I guess... Donât worry about it.â
You nod and another moment passes. The discomfort is palpable.
âSo...â
âSo!â You repeat, wincing as your voice comes out a little too loud.
You arenât sure what to do in this painfully uncomfortable situation.
âUm,â your gaze flits around the room as you search for somethingâanything to say and break the tense silence. When your eyes land on his desk, you light up.
âOh, are you into music production?â You ask, genuinely curious as you take notice of the mic and synthesizer he has set up and plugged into his laptop.
âHuh?â Jisung splutters for a moment, his eyes wide as his composure slips. âW-What would give you that idea?âÂ
His eyes flit nervously around.
âD-Did Hyunjin say something to you? Because, I mean, wh-whatever he said, it was just a joke!â
You give him a weird look and he flushes to his ears.
âUm, no, Hyunjin didnât say anything.â An awkward pause.
âI just was asking because of all... that.â You motion at his desk.
âO-oh,â Jisung winces.Â
âW-Well, the thing is...â he stutters, grasping for words that donât seem to be there. âIt just an, umââ
You donât give him the opportunity to explain.
âNo, itâs okay!â You exclaim hastily. He looks even more flustered than earlier, and you canât help but feel bad. Thisâwhatever it must beâseems to be a touchy subject.
âI didnât mean to pry!â You say quickly. âHyunjin keeps telling me I have a problem with running my mouth and butting my head into other peopleâs business, so really, you donât have to explain! Just... Forget I said anything, actually!â
You walk as you talk, blabbering as your head towards Hyunjinâs mess of a desk. His blue lab notebook is glaring at you from on top of a stack of miscellaneous assignments, and you waste no time as you snatch it up.
Jisung just watches you wordlessly, absolutely dumbfounded.
âUm,â you hesitate for a moment as you turn around to face him. âWell, again, sorry for... literally everything that just happened. IâllâI think it would be good if I left now...â
Itâs so awkward that you half-wish the ground would open up and swallow you whole, and your only consolation is that it seems Jisung feels the same way too.
You grab the doorknob and twist, speed walking out of the room and down the hallway without another word.
Itâs only once youâve rounded the corner that you pause, barely refraining from banging your head on the wall in frustration. That was a fucking disaster.
Oh, you are definitely kicking Hyunjinâs ass for this later.
With a deep breath, you make it to the stairwell and take the steps two by two until you reach the ground floor. Youâre only slightly winded as you pull out your phone to check the time. There are still thirteen minutes until Hyunjinâs lab begins, and yet youâre not surprised to see eight unread text messages from him.
[7:40pm] hyunjin:Â itâs the blue one!!! pls get the right one omg
[7:41pm] hyunjin:Â y/n are u getting it
[7:41pm] hyunjin:Â my dorm is unlocked u know that right
[7:43pm] hyunjin:Â y/n
[7:43pm] hyunjin:Â y/n why arenât u reading my msgs
[7:45pm] hyunjin:Â y/n!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[7:46pm] hyunjin:Â o yeah i forgot to mention.... jisung might be in the room
[7:46pm] hyunjin:Â oops
You quickly type out a message
[7:47pm] you:Â yeah thanks for the heads up đ
[7:47pm] you:Â iâll be there soon now stop bothering me
Four minutes and a very furious scooter ride across campus later, you are met with a very frantic Hyunjin outside the life sciences building, who tackles you the second you prop the kickstand of the scooter and step off of it.
âY/N!â He throws his arms around you and squeezes you so tightly that you choke. âOh my god, thank you. Have I mentioned I love you? Because I do. I love you so much!â
âYeah,â you flip your hair over your shoulder as you hand him his notebook. âI know.â
âYou literally have saved my life tonight,â Hyunjinâs eyes sparkle with tears and you roll your eyes. Why is he so overdramatic?
âItâs what I do,â you shrug in response. âYou owe me dinner though. Friday night, no excuses! I want sushi. That expensive place we always pass on the way to the convenience store.â
âAnything for you,â he says seriously and you grin.
âI met your roommate, by the way,â you tell him.
âYou did?â Hyunjin glances up. âAnd?â
âAnd?â You parrot, glaring at him. âAnd Iâm going to kill you! I canât believe you never told me he was hot, and now Iâm pretty sure he hates me!â
âWhat did you do to him?â He asks wearily.
âNothing!â You exclaim quickly. âI swear. I mean, I might have accused him of trying to steal from you, and also maybe, um, embarrassed him when I asked about his whole music set up, but...â
âHe told you about 3racha?â Hyunjin gapes.
âNo.â
A moment passes.
âWait, 3racha?â You backtrack, baffled. âYou mean, the rappers that youâre always playing that are, like, internet famous? That is what your roommate does? I thought he was just an audio engineering major like Chan!â
You watch as an expression that clearly reads oh shit passes over Hyunjinâs face before he tries to hide it and fake confusion.
âWhat? Noooo...â He says nervously. âW-What are you talking about?â
âNo wonder he was super weird when I asked about it. But 3rachaâs stuff is like, really good.â
A moment passes. âDoes this mean your roommate is famous?â
âW-What?â He stutters. You glare at him, and a moment later, he lets out a heavy sigh.
â...Yeah.â
âDoes this mean youâre friends with the rest of 3racha, too?â You ask.
âWell...â He says slowly. His eyes are too guilty, so you know it must be true.
Then, you gasp and your knees start wobbling as something clicks in your head.Â
âChan?!â
He breaks.
âOkay, yeah, Chan, and Changbin too.â
This time your knees really do almost give out.
âSeo Changbin?â You choke. âAnd he enver told me?â
âYeah, well, you canât tell anyone,â Hyunjin grumbles. âTechnically, Iâm not even supposed to talk about it. Nobody knows except me, Chanâs roommate, and you know.â
âNobody?â You gape. âNot even Yuna?â
âEspecially not Yuna,â Hyunjin says solemnly. âItâs a really sensitive topic for Jisung... His one condition for joining Chan and Changbin was keeping a low profile, and well... People really eat up the whole secret identity thing.â
âOh.â A moment passes. âOkay.â
He looks at you expectantly.
âOh, yeah, I promise I wonât tell anybody. My mouth is shut,â you mime a zipping motion over your lips and Hyunjin lets out a sigh of relief.
âOkay, good.â
He glances down at his watch and lets out a wheeze.
âOh shit, I have to go!â His eyes widen comically and he doesnât waste a moment before turning on his heels and running towards the science building.
âOkay, bye sweetie! Have fun in class. Iâll come pick you up after soccer practice!â You call out like the obnoxious friend you are.
Predictably, he flips you off, and you laugh.
A week after that Saturday that you find out that Jisung has a girlfriend finds you finally through with all your exams. You are stuck in the library, struggling through your last essay before youâre finished with this midterm period, and the freedom tastes so sweet that you are having a hard time focusing.
But, somehow, by some magical stroke of luck, you make it through your essay. Youâre putting the finishing touches on your argument against big pharma when Hyunjin comes barrelling through the bookshelves, nearly slamming into the table youâre sitting at in his haste to reach you.
Surprised, you look up to find your best friend keeled over at the waist, panting loudly as he tries to catch his breath.
âHyunjin?â You whisper, confused. He has class right now, and youâre not sure why heâs here in the library instead of in the liberal arts building halfway across campus.
âWhat are youââ
He takes a deep breath, before screeching out, âyou bitch!â
You canât count how many heads turn at his exclamation and you narrow your eyes and yank him down into the seat next to you before he can say anything else.
âNot that I donât love to be greeted this way,â you whisper, âbut can you keep your voice down? Weâre on the quiet floor.â
âKeep my voice down?!â You think you see a vein bulge in his forehead and his eyes almost pop out of his face, but he listens and lowers his voice to a very aggressive whisper-shout.
âStill too loud,â you pinch his ear. He winces but doesnât say anything but before he can say anything, you pin him with a look that shuts him up immediately.
âNow. Why arenât you in class?â
âOh, sorry,â He mutters sarcastically. âI seem to have forgotten about it because of bigger things on my mind. Like, I donât know, my best friend keeping a secret from me!â
You deadpan. âWhat are you talking about?â
Hyunjin scoffs.
âWhat are you talking about?â He mocks, his face twisting up. âStop acting like you donât know! Youâve been outed, okay, and I just found out from Changbin.â
âI have no idea what your talking about,â you tell him honestly, then pause.
âWait... Is this about the time Changbin and I went out for ice cream without you? Because in my defense, you were passed the fuck out on the couch after those six shots and Chan said he would take care of you.â
He gasps, outraged. âYou went to get ice cream without me?â
âMaybe donât black out during the pregame next time,â you shrug.
âWeâll get back to the ice cream thing later,â Hyunjin promises you seriously, âbut that is not what Iâm talking about.â
âOkay,â you say mildly and he glares at you.
âI mean really,â Hyunjin pouts now. âHow are you going to let me find out you have a boyfriend from Changbin, of all people?â
Thereâs a moment of silence, and then you snort, turning back to your essay.
âYeah, okay. You had me for a moment there.â
He narrows his eyes and kicks you rather meanly under the table.
âWait, are you being serious?â You double take, but his eyebrows are drawn together, and there isnât a hint of humor on his face.
âY-You think Iâm in a relationship?â You ask in disbelief, and he nods resolutely.
âI know you are.â
âAnd pray tell,â you say, trying to stifle the laugh that bubbles up in the back of your throat. âWho exactly am I dating?â
âJisung,â Hyunjin says simply, and you swearâyour heart stops beating in that moment.
âWho?!â You splutter as blood rushes to your face, and now you are the one loud enough to draw the attention of everyone within a 10 foot radius.
He just scoffs.
âAnd you really thought the two of you could hide it from me, too. Your best friend. Honestly, the audacity!â he rants, but youâre still unable to contain your shock.
Your mouth opens, then closes, opens, then closes again as you search for words that arenât there.
âO-okay, you can stop joking around now,â you blubber nervously. âWhat is this really about?â
Hyunjin just stares at you, unimpressed.
âThatâs not going to work on me, Y/N. I can see right through you.â
âT-Then Changbin must be pulling your leg,â you mutter as you start drumming your fingers against the table nervously, âbecause I am most definitely not dating your roommate.â
You say it, and you know it's the truthâitâs so painfully the truth, but by now your cheeks are flushed and warm, and your eyes are shifty. It doesnât take a genius to tell that Hyunjin thinks youâre lying to him.
And you arenât, but heâs so stubborn that you know he wonât believe you no matter what you say.
Butâyou arenât dating Han Jisung. Youâre pretty sure you would know if you were, and you definitely wouldnât be able to keep it a secret, much less from your best friend.
âHeâs not,â Hyunjin says, exasperated.
âA-And how do you know that?â You ask him.
He raises an eyebrow. âBecause Jisung is the one who told Changbin about your relationship.â
âHe did what?â You shriek. Youâre so loud that you are probably two minutes away from being kicked out, but you canât bring yourself to care.
You feel like youâre in an alternate universe, one where things donât make sense and everything is opposite of what is should be. You must be, right? Or maybe youâre dreaming. Yes, that would make so much more sense.
âI mean, I donât care that the two of you are dating,â Hyunjin sniffs, âbut you couldâve at least told me. I mean, my best friend and my roommate. Hiding it from me! I canât believeâŠâ
He keeps rambling on, but the blood rushing through your ears muffles his voice, and you take two fingers and pinch yourselfâhard. This fever dream must be because of all the coffee you drank yesterday, you think.
Except when you pinch, you actually feel it.
âWhat?â You mutter yourself, your heart beating a mile a minute as your brain struggles to comprehend the fact that you are, in fact, awake. Which would meanâŠ
âHyunjin,â you interrupt him, feeling a little bit crazed. âYouâre saying that Jisung told Changbin that his secret girlfriend, the one heâs keeping from all of us, is⊠me?â
Your best friend scoffs. âYes, Y/N, obviously. We all know now!â
You look at him, your head swimming with many thoughts (none of which make sense) and he stares right back.
And thenâyou canât help it. You burst out laughing.
âY-Y/N?â Hyunjin asks uncertainly, concerned when your cackling starts to border on maniacal.
Your chest hurts and you reach a hand up to wipe away a tearâitâs just that funny. Itâs funny that Hyunjin thinks youâre dating anyone, let alone Han fucking Jisung, the guy youâve had a big fat crush on for who knows how long. Itâs just funny.
It takes a moment for your laughter to subside, but you canât shake the crazy grin that seems to have taken up residence on your face. Youâre more than aware how fucking mental you must look, butâwell, you feel like your brain might melt into goo soon, so you canât really help it.
Hyunjin looks more than a bit frightened, but you pay no mind as you close your laptop (probably a bit more forcefully than you should have) and then shove it into your bag.
âWhere Jisung is right now?â You ask him with a sweet smile, but your tone is cutting and sharp, and he shrinks back into his seat a little.
âGreat. Iâll see you later.â And before he can process it, youâre gone.
Itâs a ten minute walk from the library to Banana Tree, but with the amount of adrenaline rushing through your veins, you manage to make it there in six.
On most days, the line is long and winding and itâs more than a little difficult to find a place to sit, but today you find that the line is considerably short and only a few people are scattered throughout the coffee shop.
Usually, you would be ecstatic; the short line means instant gratification for your coffee addiction, but todayâyou donât hesitate before breezing past the cashier and heading straight towards the back, where you immediately spot Jisung hunched over his laptop in the corner.
His eyebrows drawn together in concentration beneath his wire-rimmed glasses, and heâs looking good in his hoodie and skinny jeans, but youâre here on a mission and you refuse to let the way your heart skips a beat distract you from it.
âWhaâOh!â Jisung yelps, looking up and almost falling out of his seat in surprise as you slide into the empty chair opposite of him.
âY/N! Jesus, you gave me a heart attack,â he breathes out, as he clutches his chest, and you raise an eyebrow.
âYouâre still alive,â you say mildly. âI think youâll be fine,â
âWell,â he clears his throat as he straightens up in his chair. âYes, butâŠâ
He isnât sure what it is, but the way youâre eyeing him, like youâre trying to figure out the best way to kill him, makes him nervous.
Which is funny, because in your head, you actually are running through places you could hide his body without being caughtâŠ
You know, just in case.
âSoâŠâ He says slowly. âWhatâs up?â
âOh, nothing much,â you respond conversationally as you snatch his iced coffee away from him before he can protest and take a nice, long sip.
You watch as the frothy liquid travels up the straw as you try to convince yourself not to stare at him, because you know the longer you look at him, the quicker your anger will escape you.
Even now, looking half-scared and half-confused, he still manages to look good. With those glasses, heâs giving off those âhot TA that you might hook up with at a frat partyâ kind of vibe, and you know if you stare too long, youâll forget why youâre here in the first place.
âWhatâs up with you, boyfriend?â
That one word is almost like an arrow with how sharp you throw it out, and from the way Jisungâs expression slowly melts from one of confusion to one of grim understanding and dread, you can tell that it hits right on the bullseye.
âLook,â he says quickly, his face heating up. âI can explain, I promise!â
âWell,â you drawl. âBy all means, go ahead.â
Youâre shorter than Jisung, but from the way he seems to shrink under your gaze, you might as well be towering over him.
A moment passes, then another, almost as if heâs trying to figure out how to begin, and then:
âDo you remember the first time we met?â
You wrinkle your nose at the unexpected question.
âWell, actually Iâd rather like to forget the whole accusing you of being a thief part, but yes.â
âYeah, understandable,â he nods. âIt was really awkward.â
That is an understatement.
âBut Iâm not talking about you threatening me with a frying pan,â he continues.
âYou said you forgave me for that!â You protest, and he deadpans.
âI lied.â
You open your mouth, not sure whether or not youâre going to insult him or just kick him under the table.
Instead, you opt for saying, âwell then, which part are you talking about?â
âThe, um, well,â he looks around, suddenly awkward as his voice lowers to a mumble that is so soft you can barely make out what heâs saying.
âWhat?â You ask, your ears straining.
âWell, you know⊠When you found out about, um,â he gesticulates randomly in the air, and you squint.
âJisung, I have absolutely no idea what youâre trying to say,â you tell him exasperatedly. âCan you use your words?â
â3racha!â He finally explodes. âYou found out about it when we first met.â
You stare at him, confused. âOkay?â
âAnd, itâs just that⊠You know how itâs a secret right? The whole ânobody knows who they areâ kind of thing. I mean, now itâs really big all over campus and people like the whole mystery⊠Say itâs part of the listening experience or whatever⊠But even from the beginning, I never really wanted people to know it was me,â he rambles on, and itâs like a dam has broken. The words pour out of his mouth and he canât seem to stop them.
âWhich is why itâs kind of ironic that, like, the entire time youâve known me, youâve also known my biggest secret. Actually, itâs a bit unnerving, if Iâm being honest. Iâm surprised Hyunjin managed to not tell you even before you met me, actually but itâs just thatââ He takes a deep breath, cutting off his tirade when he notices the glare you have focused on him.
ââWell, what Iâm trying to say is, you know, the reason we donât go public isnât because we think weâre above it all.â
You stare blankly at him.
âYeah, I understand that,â you tell him like itâs the most obvious thing in the world, and he balks at you.
âWhat I donât understand,â you continue on, âis what exactly 3racha and your underground rapping career have to do with the fact that our closest friends now seem to think weâre in a relationship.â
âWell,â he begins sheepishly. âItâs actually kind of a funny story.â
You glare at him.
âOkay!â Heâs quick to say. âWell, basically, Yuna might have suspected I was hiding something from her, and when she was, like, two seconds away from figuring out about 3racha, it might have just⊠slipped out?â
Jisung pauses and the air is thick with anticipation, as if he thinks you might smack him right then and there.
âSlipped out,â you echo in disbelief. âThat you have a secret girlfriend, and that girlfriend is me?â
âYes,â his voice is small.
âBut⊠Why me?â You ask after a moment, lost.
âI-I mean, you were the first person to come to mind,â he mutters as his shifty eyes avoid yours. âYou know about 3racha, and I panicked, and then I had already said your name and it was too late...â
You narrow your eyes and he lets out a sigh.
âLook,â he begins solemnly. âI know itâs out of the blue, but you know how Yuna is⊠Well, actually, you know how all of our friends are. They donât give up easily, and I swear it wasnât my intention to drag you into this, so Iâm really sorry.â
Jisung hesitates.
âAnd Iâm really sorry to have to ask you this, too, butâŠWould you mind going along with it? Just for a little while! I know itâs a lot to ask, but you would be saving my life.â
He looks you dead in the eye. âLike, literally saving my life. I think Yuna and Felix might murder me if they find out the truth.â
A moment passes, then another as you scramble to find words. Youâre not sure what so say, how to respond to⊠that, and the longer you wait, the more worried he becomes.
âWait, you donât have a boyfriend right now, do you?â He asks, his eyebrows furrowed.
Your reaction is instantaneous and you scoff a little. âNo, I definitely do not.â
Jisung sags in relief, but his eyes stay trained on you, and you canât help but feel a little nervous. The earnesty of his gaze is piercing, and it makes you flush.
âSo, you actually want to do this?â You ask him for confirmation. âLie to our friends and pretend like weâre dating?â
âYes?â He winces.
You look at him for a moment, watching as he braces himself as if heâs expecting the worst, but the truth isâyou already know your answer. Hell, he could ask you to jump off a cliff and you would probably say yes to that too.
âOkay.â
âWaitâreally?â He asks in disbelief, and you nod.
âYeah, I mean⊠I wouldnât want you to have to tell everyone about 3racha because of me, so⊠I guess thereâs not much of a choice, anyways.â
âOh, thank God,â He blurts out, looking like heâs only seconds away from bowing down to you and kissing your feet. âThank you so much. I really owe you.â
âI just have one question,â you say after a moment.
âYeah?â Jisung replies, distracted, as if nothing could bring his mood down.
âWhy didnât you just ask me?â
âWhat?â He cocks his head to the side.
âI mean,â you say slowly. âWhy didnât you just ask me to pretend to be your girlfriend? I would have said yes.â
âOh.â He pauses, and a look of realization passing over his face.
âYou know⊠I didnât even think of that.â
You have to refrain from smacking yourself in the head. Of course you had to go and fall for an idiot.
Of course.
You are spiraling.
âJisung, I donât think I can do this.â
You are spiraling, and there is literally nothing anyone can do about it because, oh my god, you are an idiot for agreeing to a plan so idiotic that it has already started to fall apart.
Itâs currently two days after you agreed to lie to all of your friends and fake date Jisung, and the two of you have been sitting in the student activity center for the past thirty minutes working through the details of your ârelationship,â because like the idiots you are, you both managed to forget you had to figure these things out if you hoped to convince anyone that you are in love.
Great.
Exceptâwhen you wake up this morning, the day starts off bad, and only continues to get worse. Itâs almost as if Murphyâs law chooses you as itâs sole victim today, because anything that can go wrong is most definitely going wrong right now.
First, you almost sleep through your British literature lecture in the morning when youâre alarm decided to conveniently stop working (and by stop working, you mean completely fall apart, most likely because of the way Hyunjin had thrown it at the wall last Thursday when the two of you decided to unwind with a bottle of wine... Each.)
After stumbling into the giant lecture hall still in your pajamas, you manage to make it to you next classâStatsâon time. Until you realize you somehow managed to forget about the quiz that your TA sent fifty emails out about.
Then, after that ordeal, you show up at the sandwich shop right next to the Maths building in hopes of grabbing a quick bite to eat, only to find the line winding and out the door.
Itâs as you are about to scream violently into the void because of how crappy the day has been going that you get a text message from Jisung, who asks if the two of you can meet at the student activity center. With a sigh, you quickly type out a reply before dragging your feet up the hill and towards said buildingâŠ
âŠWhere you proceed to wait for who knows how long because, in true Jisung fashion, he shows up late to a meeting he himself set up.
And then, after you eat half a bowl of soup, he finally shows up, frantic and apologeticâwhich leads you to now.
âY/N?â Jisung asks uncertainly, waving his hand in front of your face.
âOh my god, I canât believe you actually managed to talk me into this,â you breathe out, rocking back and forth slightly in your chair.
The weight of what you are about to doâlie to your friends, pretend to date the guy you have feelings for, all of the above?âhits you like a freight train.
âLike, seriously?â You turn your frantic gaze to Jisungâs face. âYou really want to do this? There is no other excuse we can use? Maybe theyâll believe us if we tell them it was just a joke?â
âUmâŠâ He says meekly, but you are on a rant and you barely even hear him as you continue on.
âI canât believe that out of all the people in the world, it had to be my name that you thought of first... I mean, I donât even know if I should be flattered or just angry, because oh my god, Jisung I really canât do this. Hyunjin is my best friend! How am I supposed to lie to him? I donât think I can lie to him. Like, physically, I think itâs impossible. And then Iâm going to have to lie to Yuna, and Changbin too? I live with Yuna, sheâs going to see right through me! Whoâs going to believe the two of us are dating? Oh my god, I think Iâm going to pass out. Why would youââ
âOkay, Y/N,â Jisung interjects, grabbing you by the shoulders gently. âIâm going to need you to stop for a moment and just breathe. Can you breathe for me?â
You look at him, bewildered, as if youâve never heard of the concept of breathing. Right now, it actually feels like you havenât. Youâre all hot and panicky, and youâre not sure your lungs are functioning correctlyâif they are at all. Itâs like all eyes are on you, and if you were a little bit less crazed, you would know thatâs not true, but right nowâright now, all you can think about is how nice it would be if you just dropped dead right here.
âBreathe,â he nods encouragingly. âYeah, in and out, can you do it with me?â
A moment passes, but heâs looking at you so expectantly, and even ten seconds away from a panic attack youâre still whipped for him, so hesitantly, you nod in agreement.
âAlright, thatâs great,â he beams at you.
âJust in,â he breathes in and you shakily follow suit. âAnd out.â
You repeat once, and then twice, and by the third time you can feel yourself calming down.
âOh. Okay, yeah,â you shake your arms out. âItâs all good, rightâŠâ
Jisung grins and your heart skips a beatâbut this kind of nervousness, well, youâre used to it by now. The familiar butterflies in your stomach are almost grounding, and it only takes a few moments before youâre completely calm.
âSo,â you clear your throat, embarrassed. âItâs all fine. Lying to our mutual best friends is fine, right. What were we talking about, anyways?â
âOh!â Jisung starts. âI think we were on what our first date was.â
âFirst date?â You wrinkle your nose. âCanât you decide?â
âHey, I already decided how I asked you out. Our first date is yours to decide.â
You groan, thinking about how Jisungâafter a lot of thinkingâhad come to the executive decision that he asked you out two months ago, after he ended up taking care of you at some frat party you both went to while Hyunjin was home visiting his parents.
The truth is, that weekend you were abysmally sick and could barely get out of bed, and Jisung was studying for the four midterms he had the following week, so neither of you went to that partyâbut... Nobody needs to know the truth, right?
âFine,â you say finally. âWeâll just say our first date was the movies and dinner.â
âNo, thatâs too boring,â Jisung protests, and you glare at him.
âExcuse me?â
He rolls his eyes. âI would never plan a date as boring as the movies and dinner.
It has to be at least a little realistic, right?â
You glare at him.
âThen, pray tell, what kind of date would you plan?â
âWell,â Jisung begins matter-of-factly. âTo start off with, dinner is so overrated. I think a brunch picnic is much more fun, especially because breakfast food is like, ten thousand times better.â
âThatâs just because you have an unhealthy obsession with french toastâŠâ You mutter.
âFrench toast is a superior food group!â He tells you adamantly.
âNot a food group,â you sigh. âBut fine. A brunch picnic, is that all?â
âWell, the brunch picnic would be at that park next to the Han river, and while weâre there, we would feed the ducks there because they are so cute,â Jisung continues. âAnd then, I would take you go kartingâbut I would let you win, because Iâm good first date material.â
âGo karting?â You raise an eyebrow and he sticks his tongue out.
âI mean, youâre so competitiveâŠâ
A moment passes as you think about it, and then you nod.
âOkay,â you shrug. âButâletâs get one thing straight. I would win because Iâm better, not because you let me.â
Jisung scoffs. âAs if.â
âReally?â You raise an eyebrow. âI wonder who it is that canât even win Mario Kart, then?â
âFirst of all,â he is quick to protest. âThatâs just a video game!â
âSucks that you canât win at go kart even digitally,â you respond, disappointed.
âWellââ
âAnyways!â You exclaim, pretending you donât hear his cries of protests. âWeâve figured out how we met, when and where our first date was, how long weâve been dating⊠What about why weâve been keeping this a secret?â
âOh,â Jisung pales. âThat one is easy.â
You furrow your brow in confusion.
âWhat do you mean?â
âUmâŠâ He trails off. âWell, hypothetically⊠Hyunjin and Changbin might have threatened to, you know, hypothetically kill me if I ever tried to make a move on you?â
You narrow your eyes. âThey did what?â
Jisung winces, as if bracing for you to yell at him, but after a moment, you just sigh.
âWhateverâŠâ You mutter under your breath, even as you plot. âIâll deal with them laterâŠâ
He lets out a sigh of relief and visibly relaxes, which only makes you want to smack him becauseâyou canât be that scary, right?
Instead of asking, you clear your throat. âAnyways, is there anything else?â
âUh⊠I donât think so?â Jisung scratches his head as he thinks.
âWell then,â you say. âWe should be fine. I mean, weâll have to tell our friends soon, but with a few more days to prepare, I think we might be able to pull it offâŠâ
You reach up to gnaw on your nail nervously, and itâs as youâre running through the various ways you might actually be able to convince your best friends that the two of you have been secretly dating, Jisung gets a text message.
âIt might be rough,â you mutter once again, although this time itâs more to yourself than to him. âBut, well, Hyunjin is kind of unobservant, so with our luck, he might just glaze right over it anywaysâŠâ
âU-um⊠About that,â Jisung starts nervously, and you look up at him.
âYes?â You ask, taking a long sip from your water bottle.
âHyunjin just texted me that heâs going to meet us here in, like⊠5 minutes?â
You choke on the water, barely stopping yourself from spewing it everywhereâand just like that, your hysteria from earlier comes crashing down on you.
âIâm sorry, what?!â You balk, your fists clenched so tight you can feel the crescent-shaped nail marks forming on your palm.
âOkay, in my defense,â Jisung protests immediately when you threateningly wield your blue mechanical pencil in his direction. âI told him not to come, but he has my location on and he said heâs coming here anyways!â
You inhale sharply, and a moment passes.
âGive me your phone.â
âW-What?â Thereâs a hint of fear in Jisungâs eyes, but you donât even care as you try to calm yourself.
âDid I stutter?â You ask, your gaze murderous, and he sinks back into his seat.
âN-Now, Y/N, letâs just think about this logicallyâŠâ
He looks like heâs going to say more, but youâre already up and out of your seat, reaching over the table you are both sat at for his phone. Jisung, a step ahead of you, snatches it out of your grasp.
âGive me your phone, Jisung,â you say stubbornly.
âIf I give it to you, are you going to throw it across the room?â He asks.
ââŠMaybe.â
He pauses, as if heâs actually thinking about it, before telling you plainly: âMmm, in that case⊠No.â
âJisung,â you whine. âGive it to me! All I want to do is turn off your location sharing, okay? I promise I wonât do anything to your phone⊠Mostly.â
He opens his mouth, but before he can speak something over your shoulder catches his attention. Youâre still halfway out of your seat, pouting at him.
âY/Nââ He tries to interrupt, but you ignore him and continue on.
âI mean, first you decide to go around and tell all of our friends that the two of us are dating without even consulting me first, and then you let me find out from Hwang Hyunjin of all people, before finally coercing me into a fake relâmmph!â
Panic flashes across Jisungâs face and his eyes widen as he stares at something directly behind you. And then, before you can process it, heâs grabbing your face with both his handsâhis left one on your cheek and his right one awkwardly placed half on your chin, half over your mouth.
Then, he yanks you close to him and plants an over-exaggerated kiss on top of the hand that is covering your lips.
âOh, hi Hyunjin,â Jisung says loudly when he pulls away. âDidnât see you there!â
Your face is so red and youâre so surprised that you canât move, not even when Hyunjin lets out a strangled gagging noise as he comes to a skidding halt next to the table you and Jisung are sitting at.
âWere you guys justâkissing?â Hyunjin asks, his face contorted in disgust.
âWhat?â Jisung says, almost defensively. âNoooâŠâ
ââYou know what⊠Nevermind.â Hyunjin shakes his head, as if that might remove the image he just saw.
âI guess you two really are datingâŠâ He mutters to himself, repulsed.
âAnyways,â Jisung clears his throat a moment later as you continue to stare, unblinking and stone faced off into the distance. âWhy are you here, Hyunjin?â
âWhat?â He asks. âI canât visit my best friend and roommate on this random Wednesday afternoon after they kept their secret relationship from me?â
âUmâŠâ Jisung trails off. âHonestly, Iâm not sure how to respond to that.â
Hyunjin huffs. âWell, if you must know, my ecology lecture was cancelled, and I have nothing better to do, so I came here.â
Youâre only half listening, and your best friend looks at you weirdly.
âWhatâs wrong with her?â He asks Jisung, waving his hand in front of your face. âWas kissing you really that emotionally scarring?â
Jisung scowls and kicks Hyunjin under the table, and you still donât respond.
âY/N,â Hyunjin calls out. âY/N?â
Somewhere in the back of your mind, his voice registers, but itâs like your brain has shut down and your synapses have stopped firing, because all you can do is stare.
âY/N,â your best friend sighs exasperatedly, and then reaches out and smacks you across the face.
âOuch!â You squeal, effectively knocked out of whatever stupor you had been in.
âWhat the fuck, Hyunjin? That hurt!â
âThat hurt?â He mocks.
âYou know what really hurts? My best friends hiding their relationship from me forââ
He stops.
ââWait, how long have you guys been dating for?â
âTwo months,â you grumble.
âTwo months?!â Hyunjin shrieks. âYou imbeciles hid this from me for two months?â
âYes,â you glare at him.
âSorry?â Jisung adds helpfully.
âI donât get paid enough for this,â Hyunjin cries out and you roll your eyes.
âNobody is paying you for this, dummy.â
He pouts. âWell, someone should.â
âPay you? For doing nothing? This is exactly why the institution of capitalism is detrimental to the function of society as a whole,â you scoff, and Jisung and Hyunjin look at you weirdly.
âWhat?â You say defensively. âIâm taking a course on communism versus capitalism, and I have a paper due today.â
âOkayâŠâ The weird look doesnât leave either of their faces.
âWait,â you start. âMy paper! What time is it?â
âItâs 4:24ââ Hyunjin tells you.
âFuck!â You exclaim. âI have to turn in my paper to my TA by 4:30!â
You waste no time in grabbing your bag and throwing it over your shoulder, and then getting up and practically running out of the student activity center.
âGood luck!â Jisung calls out, but youâre already gone.
âDo you think she heard me?â He asks Hyunjin.
âNo.â
A few days later, youâre walking out of your music appreciation class when you get a frantic text from Jisung.
Technically, you arenât even meant to be taking music appreciation this semester. But when you were registering for classes last semester, the ethnoarchaeology course you wanted to get into was full, and this was your only other option.
It turned out fine, though, because itâs a blow off class, an easy A that gets your fine arts core credit out of the way, so itâs a win win.
[7:01pm] jisung: HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[7:02pm] you: whatâs up?
[7:02pm] jisung: OUR COVER IS ABOUT TO BE BLOWN!!!!
[7:02pm] jisung: YOUâRE IN THE MUSIC BUILDING RN RIGHT????
[7:03pm] you: yes???
[7:03pm] you: what do you mean our cover is abt to be blown???
[7:05pm] you: jisung????
[7:05pm] jisung: was doing 3racha stuff
[7:05pm] jisung: now yuna is coming to visit cb
[7:06pm] jisung: HELP?!
[7:06pm] you: oh lmao
[7:06pm] you: u had me worried.. just hide somewhere until she leaves
[7:07pm] jisung: no y/n
[7:07pm] jisung: i told her we were hanging out 2nite
[7:07pm] jisung: y/n she has my location on
[7:08pm] you: oh
[7:08pm] you: oh fuck
[7:08pm] you: where r u??? iâll come 2 u
[7:08pm] you: outside practice room #4
You find yourself breaking out into a brisk jog right when you receive the message, turning down the hallway until you find the stairwell and then taking the steps two by two. Three flights later, you come out on the 2nd floor, and it doesnât take long for you to spot Jisung pacing nervously in the corridor lined with practice rooms.
âJisung,â you hiss as you approach, looking both ways down the hall to make sure Yuna isnât here yet.
âOh my god, Y/N,â he breathes out in unadulterated relief when he sees you.
âWhy did you tell Yuna we were hanging out tonight?â You ask, your eyes narrowed.
He shrugs helplessly. âChangbin, Chan, and I had plans tonight, but she knows Changbin is a part of 3racha, andâI donât know, I panicked!â
You let out a deep sigh, and then square your shoulders.
âOkay, first of allâwe need to have a talk about having your location on for all of our friends, because this really keeps fucking us over,â you tell him sternly.
He nods miserably. âI know.â
âSecond of all,â you continue, relaxing slightly. âThis actually isnât that bad⊠If Yuna asks what you were doing here, you can just tell her you came to pick me up from class. Itâs the perfect cover.â
âReally?â He asks dubiously, but you can see the weight ease up on his shoulders slightly.
âYeah,â you shrug. âItâs believable, and sheâll have no reason to suspect otherwise.â
âOkayâŠâ Jisung relaxes. âSo, how was yourâmmph!â
And then, before he can finish his thought, youâre yanking him by the wrist and all but shoving him through the first door you find.
Which, of course, with your luck, just so happens to be a broom closet.
âWhat the fuck?â
âYuna was coming down the hallway,â you hiss. âNow be quiet!â
âOh,â he mumbles, and silence falls over the two of you.
Youâre hyperaware of how close you are to Jisungâthe closet is small and dimly lit, and thereâs virtually no where to stand with all the space the mops and buckets, and youâre almost chest to chest. Heâs staring awkwardly off into the space behind your left ear, and your furrowing your eyebrows as you strain to hear out in the hallway while simultaneously pretending this isnât the worst situation. Ever.
As you listen, you hear the clicking of heels grow closerâwhich you assume is Yuna, if her obsession with strappy heels is anything to go by. The rhythmic clacking becomes louder as she gets closer, and then, it suddenly comes to a stop.
âYuna,â you hear Changbinâs voice, close to the closet youâre currently hiding in. âWhatâs up?â
âChangbin!â She exclaims. âI have a bone to pick with you.â
âW-What did I do?â You can hear the fear in his voice, and if you werenât scared shitless that your roommate might find you and turn that anger onto you, you would probably find it hilarious.
âChan told me everything,â you can practically hear the way her eyes narrow murderously, and you and Jisung share a mutually horrified look.
Being on Yunaâs bad side is something you never wanted to experience.
âH-He did?â
âYes, you fool! I know that you were passed out last Saturday after going to that Sigma party when I specifically told you that you couldnât go because we were having brunch with your mom.â
Jisung lets out a snort, and you elbow him in the ribcage.
âWhat?â he mutters. âI was there. He downed like eight shots in fifteen minutes and blacked after that.â
âBe quiet,â you glare. âTheyâll hear us.â
Changbin and Yunaâs conversation continues on, escalating into what seems to be an argument, but Jisung is grinning, his eyes bright, and it takes your breath away to the point that you canât even hear what theyâre saying above the rush of blood in your ears.
Now youâre the one staring off behind his head awkwardly, your palms sweaty as you try to think about anything except how cute he is and how nervous that makes you.
A moment passes, with Changbin and Yuna still talking outside the closet youâre in, and Jisung clears his throat awkwardly.
âSoâŠâ He whispers a second later. âDo you come here often?â
You stare at him full on.
âWhat the fuck?â
He shrugs. âIâm trying out new pick up lines. What do you think?â
You wrinkle your nose in disgust. âThat wasnât even a pick up line. That was like⊠I donât even know, but it definitely wasnât a pick up line.â
âReally?â He raises a brow. âThen what is?â
You scoff. âAs if Iâd ever use my lines on you.â
âNo, now Iâm interested.â
âWell thatâs too bad,â you stick out your tongue.
âPlease?â He asks, and you open your mouth to say noâuntil you see his wide puppy dog eyes, pleading with you, and you melt.
âMmm,â you press your lips into a tight line.
Yunaâs voice rises outside, and you turn away from Jisung as you mumble out, âI dunno, something like... Are you a greenhouse gas? Because youâre hot enough to cause global warming... Or something.â
Thereâs a moment of silence and you cringe at how embarrassing it is, and then Jisung barely manages to stifle a laugh.
âMaybe I should just stick to being straightforward,â he says, pursing his lips to stop the smile from spreading across his face. âBecause it seems you have the witty pick up lines covered.â
âPersonally,â You wrinkle your nose. âI think you should stick to saying nothingâŠâ
âWhat?â He pouts. âThe classic âlet me take you out on a dateâ never fails.â
âMmm,â you grimace. âI give it a 5 out of 10 for getting to the point, but 2 out of 10 for creativity.â
âWow okay,â he says. âI guess I canât do anything to impress you, huh?â
âNot really.â
He grins. âWhat a mean thing to say to your boyfriend.â
Your heart skips a beat, and you canât help the way your jaw drops when he says that. Becauseâitâs one thing to fake a relationship. Itâs another thing to actually hear him call himself your boyfriend.
You cough slightly, barely managing to clear your throat before glaring at him.
âFake boyfriend.â
Jisung chuckles, and heâs so close to you that if you think about it hard enough, you can convince yourself that you can feel his laugh. His breath is minty and warm, and ghosts across your cheek. You think you might melt into a puddle if you spend another moment in this closet with him.
âWhat?â He says playfully. âAm I not real boyfriend material?â
You deadpan.
âJisung, Iâve seen you pick your nose.â You snort. âThe day I date you is the day you dye your hair blue.â
âWell, I meanââ He begins, but itâs at that moment that you realize you can no longer hear Changbin and Yuna arguing on the other side of the door.
âShh!â You hold your finger up towards him, pressing your ear against the door.
A moment passes, and then another, and you still donât hear anything.
âI think the coast is clear,â you say hushed to Jisung.
Then, you open the door slightlyâonly enough for you to see out into the hallway through the sliver of space between the hinges of the door.
The hallway is empty, and with a sigh of relief, you swing the door open all the way.
âOh thank god,â you exhale, and for the first time in the past 10 minutes, you feel like you can breathe again.
âWell,â Jisung says awkwardly, following you out of the broom closet. âSorry about this⊠I really didnât think Yuna would be coming here tonight.â
You roll your eyes. âItâs no big deal. Youâre just lucky I actually decided to go to class today.â
âWell,â he says. âThanks anyways. Can I treat you to dinner to show my appreciation?â
You raise an eyebrow. âFree food?â
âI mean,â Jisung mutters. âItâll be cheap food, but yeah. Iâll pay.â
You grin. As a broke and nearly starving college student, the cardinal rule is never turn down free food.
âLead the way!â
The next night, Jisung finds himself at Chanâs apartment in an attempt to complete the song the 3 of them had been working on the night before.
After spending the past three hours mixing and remixing sounds and still being dissatisfied with the product, Chan had decided they needed a little bit of a break from it allâwhich leads them to now, sitting in the living room around the dingy coffee table that only has 3 functional legs, eating spicy ramyeon like their lives depend on it.
âSo,â Jisung starts in between slurps, chewing obnoxiously as he talks. âWhat dâyou think of the new lyrics? I know the old ones were a bit⊠eh, but I really feel like these might be the one!â
Naruto is playing in the background, and as Jisung goes to take another bite, Chan and Changbin exchange a look.
âWellâŠâ Chan starts wearily, but Jisungâconsumed in his foodâdoesnât notice his tone.
âJisung,â Changbin interrupts, shooting a pointed glare at Chan. âWe need to talk.â
âWe are talkingâŠ?â
âWe need to talk⊠About you and Y/N,â Chan clarifies, and Jisung freezes.
Thereâs a noodle hanging out of his mouth, which is agape, and ice floods his veins as anxiety washes over him.
Y/N? Why do they need to talk about you?
They stare at him, expressions deadpan, and then it hits him.
Oh god, Changbin and Chan found out that youâre not really dating and youâve been lying to all of them. The ruse is up, the two of you have been found out.
âW-Well,â He sets his chopsticks down hesitantly, his hands shaking slightly as he goes. âI mean, we donât n-need toâŠâ
âUm,â Changbin gives him a weird look. âYeah, I think we do. This is kind of a big deal, Jisung.â
âMmm, no,â Jisungâs voice pitches upwards and he clears his throat. âItâs nothing! Whatever youâve heard, itâs not like that!â
Chan furrows his brow.
âNo, Iâm pretty sure it is like that.â
Dread builds up in the back of Jisungâs throat, and he realizesâhis death is close. Because if Chan and Changbin have found out his lie⊠Itâs only a matter of time until Hyunjin discovers the truth, and then the rest of their friendsâŠ
âŠIncluding Yuna.
The thought is so scary that Jisung has to frantically take a large gulp of water to calm himself down.
âJisungâŠ?â Changbin questions, concerned as he watches the younger boy down his entire water bottle in ten seconds flat.
âOkay,â he sighs, squaring his shoulders as if heâs preparing to fight someone.
âLook, I know it looks bad, but I have a reason okay!â Jisung blurts out.
Chan clears his throat. âWell, yeah, of course you have a reason⊠But that doesnât mean you should have done it anywaysâŠâ
He shudders and Changbin nods.
âYeah, dude,â he says, disappointed. âLike come on. I thought you were better than this.â
Jisung runs a hand through his hair.
âListen, guys, Iâm really sorry! It wasnât supposed to go down like this, I swearâŠâ
Chan sighs heavily. âYeah, but that doesnât mean you should write love songs.â
âYuna just cornered me, andâwait, what?!â Jisung cuts off when he realizes what Chan has just said.
Chan winces. âYeah⊠your new lyrics arenât, um, bad, butâŠâ
âPlease, no more sappy love songs?â Changbin adds helpfully. âLike, you and Y/N are dating, which is kind of cool⊠gross, mostly⊠But please. We have a reputation to uphold.â
âHuh?â Jisung continues to just stare at his friends, openmouthed and confused.
Changbin rolls his eyes. âWhat will people think if the mysterious and elusive 3racha suddenly start writing love songs?â
âUmâI, um, imagine that⊠Wouldnât be cool?â
âExactly,â Changbin nods. âSo, we have an understanding?â
Jisung stares, helplessly. âI guess?â
âGreat,â Chan affirms. âNow, about that bridge, I was thinkingâŠâ
The next few weeks pass in a weird sort of limbo, where you find yourself spending more time with Jisung than you thought you ever would.
After he treats you to cheap diner food that Thursday you almost get caught by Yuna, you two make it a habit of grabbing dinner together every week after your music appreciation class. Jisung somehow manages to convince Changbin and Chan that spending their Thursday nights in the music building is a good idea just so that your schedules can match, and you think itâs kind of cute that heâs that dedicated to keeping up your fake dating ruse.
Soon after that, you end up seeing him everywhere you go.
Like when he shows up with coffee for you after your Tuesday tutoring sessions in the student activity center, or when he saves a seat for you in the library on Wednesday nights because he knows you have weekly quizzes on Thursday to study for.
You soon find that if you arenât on campus for classes or back at your apartment, youâre usually at Hyunjin and Jisungâs place. You spend so much time thereâwhich you didnât think was possible, considering your friendship with Hyunjinâto the point that they end up telling you where they hide the spare key.
Youâve known where it was for the past year (under the doormat, because they arenât very creative) but you let them think that itâs news to you.
Itâs weird, because in the span of a few weeks, Jisung becomes so commonplace in your life that sometimes, even though you donât mean to, you forget itâs all fake.
Okay, wellâobviously the friendship part isnât, because the two of you have been friends (or, at the very least, friendly) for the better part of two years.
But when Jisung casually slips his hand into yours as the two of you walk down the street together, or when he greets you with a hug that makes you feel so warm inside while your friends are watching, itâs easy to pretendâeven if only for a secondâthat this is for real.
When you let yourself believe that (which, youâre ashamed to say is far more often than youâd like it to be) youâre left feeling even worse afterwards, when you come down from whatever cloud 9 he has pushed you up onto and reality sets in.
When you remember that none of it is real, that youâre just friends and youâre a fool for thinking otherwise, well⊠Letâs just say, itâs not the nicest feeling.
Which, as one can imagine, leaves you feeling increasingly confused. You spend so much time with Jisung that you never get a reprieve from him, whichâa few months ago would have been a dream, but now, it just feels like torture.
You end up spending more and more time obsessing over your complicated feelings for him, and sometimes (most of the time) you just want to scream because of how frustrating it is.
You almost do, actually, when you walk into their apartment after your classes end, and Jisung greets you with a tiny kiss on the cheekâsomething that heâs done before, usually when your friends are around, but still continues to catch you off guard.
âHey,â he says easily with a grin, and you kind of want to punch the stupid smile off of his stupid face. âHow were your classes today?â
You clear your throat, fighting off the heat rising to your cheeks.
âThey were fine⊠Yours?â
âAll good,â he responds before frowning. âAlthough, Professor Moon was kind of a dick todayâŠâ
âWell,â you begin as you set your bag down and flop onto his couch. âYouâre only taking his class for credit, right?â
He nods.
âThen you shouldnât stress yourself out about it like you did last time. Heâll always be a dick, no matter how long you spend worrying about his class.â
âYeah,â he sighs, melting into the seat next to you. âI guess youâre right.â
You scoff. âOf course I am. Iâm always right.â
He raises his arms in mock surrender. âOh, my bad for forgetting, your Holiness.â
You flip him off and he laughs.
âAnywaysâŠâ You continue, your eyes roaming across the living room, which looks different than it usually does today. âWhat is this all for?â
You motion to where there are streamers hanging across one empty wall, and then to a banner underneath that reads simply âHAPPâ in big bubble letters.
âOh,â Jisungâs eyes land on the decorations, and he shrugs. âWeâre kind of having a part tonight. Didnât I tell you?â
âUm.â You stare. âNo?â
âOops,â he mutters. âWell, weâre having a party?â
âThanks for the heads up,â you roll your eyes sarcastically, and he grins.
âWell, now that you know⊠Are you going to come tonight?â
You purse your lips. âWhen you say party, do you mean like, a party?â
ââŠMaybe?â
You raise a brow. âAnd whatâs the occasion?â
âNothing big,â Jisung mumbles. âJust, you know, my birthdayâŠâ
You choke.
âYour birthday?!â
He winces. âYeah.â
âWhat the fuck, Jisung!â You gasp, punching him in the arm. âItâs your birthday today?â
âYes?â He says it like a question and you smack him again.
âHow did you manage to not tell me that?â You exclaim.
He pouts. âI didnât think it was important.â
âJisung,â you deadpan. âWeâre literally faking a relationship. Of course itâs important!â
âOh, yeah,â he says a moment later, as if heâs forgotten completely about it, and you want to give him one of slap, just for good measure.
God, when did you get so violent?
âWell⊠Iâm sorry?â
âYou should be,â you gripe at him. âI donât even have a present for youâŠâ
âOh, I donât need any presents,â he says bashfully, and you glare at him.
âNow everyone is going to think Iâm a bad girlfriend!â
âNo they wonât,â Jisung placates, and you let out a groan.
âWell,â you sigh forlornly. âI guess this means Iâll be here tonightâŠâ
âYay!â He claps excitedly.
âYeah, whateverâŠâ You mutter under your breath.
At that moment, Jisungâs phone buzzes, and his smile melts into a frown when he  checks the message.
âWhatâs up?â You ask, curious.
âOh, Changbin just messaged saying thereâs been a mix up with the drinks for tonight,â he tells you slowly. âHe needs my help.â
âAre you going now?â
âYeah,â he gets up, grabbing his coat from the chair across from you. âIâll be back in like, 30, okay? Donât destroy my apartment while Iâm gone!â
You scoff. âYouâre the messy one.â
âIâve seen you in the kitchen, Y/N,â he calls out, hopping a little to put his shoes on.
âOkay, first of allââ You splutter, but heâs already out the door with a wink in your direction, and youâre left alone.
ââWhateverâŠâ you finally mutter to yourself, a pout on your face.
Without hesitation, you kick off the house slippers you are wearing and curl your feet underneath you, grabbing a blanket and the remote to the TV as you settle in on the couch and make yourself more comfortable.
Thatâs how Hyunjin finds you fifteen minutes later, when he arrives with an unholy amount of party decorations in his grasp.
âY/N?â He asks, his arms overflowing with plastic bags.
âHey,â you say distractedly, not bothering to look away from the TV as you greet him.
âO⊠kayâŠâ He says to himself after a moment, setting the stuff down onto the counter.
âWhere did Jisung go?â He asks as he grabs scissors from a drawer and begins cutting open the bags of decorations.
âHe said something about Changbin⊠drinks⊠Iâm not really sure, actually,â you reply back.
Hyunjin sighs. âThatâs so helpful. Thanks.â
âYouâre welcome,â you snark back.
âSoâŠâ He trails off. âAre you going to help me set up, then?â
You roll your eyes. âDo I look like I want to help you set up?â
Hyunjin glares at you.
âYou look like someone Iâm about to kick out of my apartment.â
With a loud, overdramatic sigh, you pause the show you are watching and then haul yourself up off of the couch so you can join Hyunjin in the kitchen.
âWell⊠I guess I can help,â you say begrudgingly.
âThanks,â Hyunjin says blandly. âYou can start by finishing the sign.â
He motions to the âHAPPâ hanging sadly on the wall, and you snort.
âWhat, youâre telling me it isnât supposed to look like that?â
Hyunjin looks like heâs about to smack you, but instead says, âY/N, can you just do it?â
âYeah, whateverâŠâ You snatch up the bag of bubble letters and grab a roll of tape before heading to the living room.
It isnât too difficult to finish the sign, and youâre finishing sticking up the last two letters when Hyunjin joins you withâsurprise!âeven more streamers.
âY/N,â Hyunjin says slowly as you finish the sign and step back to admire your handiwork.
âYes?â You ask, grinning at your best friend.
ââŠWhy does that sign say âHappy Birthday Bitch!â?â
You bat your eyelashes innocently.
âWhat?â You ask. âAm I wrong?â
He sighs. âNo⊠But itâs Jisung birthday. Donât you think we should be a little nice to him today?â
It takes you another ten minutes to take down the sign and replace it with the much more appropriate, and much less fun âHappy Birthday Jisung!â but you do it, and right as you move on to helping Hyunjin hang streamersâbecause God forbid there be anything less than the hundreds of them already lining the wallsâJisung arrives back, with Changbin and Felix in tow.
Changbin and Jisung are both carrying cases of beer in their hands, and Felix follows with a large tote bag that you assume is full of various bottles of hard liquor, although you canât see inside the bag because of how big it is.
âHey, Y/N,â Changbin smiles at you as he passes, and Felix perks up when he notices you.
âY/N!â He exclaims. âDo youââ
You cut him off before he can finish.
ââAnd that is my cue to leave.â
Felix scowls. âYou donât even know what I was going to sayâŠâ
âYou were going to ask me to help you with something,â you scoff. âIâve already reached my manual labor limit for the day, but nice try.â
The blond boy sulks his way into the kitchen, just as Jisung comes out after setting down the boxes he had been carrying.
âYouâre going already?â Jisung pouts.
You pat him on the cheek sweetly.
âI mean⊠yeah,â you tell him.
âWhat, do you expect me to stay for a party dressed like this?â
You motion down to your expertly coordinated ensemble of sweats and a ratty t-shirt that you think might be Hyunjinâs.
âDonât you dare lie to me,â you threaten as you dig an elbow into his side. âAnyways, Iâll be back by 9, okay?â
âOkayâŠâ He mutters sadly.
âFinally,â Hyunjin says at the same time. âSheâs leaving!â
You stick your middle finger up in his direction as you grab your bag and shove your feet back into your shoes.
âBye, bitches!â
And then youâre out the door.
Your apartment isnât far from theirsâjust around the block, and it only takes a few minutes before youâre climbing the stairs up to the 4th floor, where you live.
When you unlock the door, youâre greeted by a dark room, and youâre a little surprised to find that Yuna isnât home right now.
You flick the light switch on and kick off your shoes, walking into the kitchen to find a post it note stuck to the fridge.
Out buying Jisung a present, it reads. See u tonight! xoxo Yuna
You crumble the note in your palm before dunking it into the trash, NBA style, and you scowl when you miss.
Yunaâs note reminds you again that Jisung didnât give you any notice about his birthday, and you canât help the annoyance that rises inside of youâespecially because you didnât have the chance to do the bare minimum and scrape together a present for him.
With a sigh, you drop your school bag on the floor of your room as you head towards your closet, rummaging through your clothes as yo search for something appropriate.
Youâre looking for an outfit that says âitâs my (fake) boyfriendâs birthday today and he totally did not just tell me about it 3 hours ago!â
Itâs uncertain whether the cropped top and black jeans combo that you finally settle on gives off that vibe, but you think it looks decent (at least, better than your sweatpantsâŠ) and so you go with it.
You spend the next hour and a half around the apartment, cleaning up and taking care of small tasks here and there as you try not to think about the party tonight.
Thereâs a sort of anxiety weighing down on you about itâyouâre not sure why, either. Youâve never really had a problem with partying and letting loose before, but you have a sneaking suspicion that the weight in your gut has something to do with Jisung.
Itâs as you finish sweeping the living room that you come to the startling realization that its now nearly 9, and you lost track of time as you were cleaning.
You havenât even started your makeupâbecause you didnât want to sweat it off while stress cleaningâand you practically trip over yourself in your haste to get to your room. In a panic, you quickly swipe some concealer and mascara on, before finishing with a little lip gloss, and although it is the simplest makeup routine you could have come up with, itâs already past 9 when you stumble out of your room, hopping a little as you try to shove your sneakers on.
You take a deep breath as you shove your keys in your pocket, and thenâjust for good measureâyou open a kitchen cabinet and pour yourself a shot of vodka from Yunaâs not-so-secret stash.
You down it quickly and it burns your throat, leaving an acrid taste in your mouth and a weird warm sensation in your chest and your headâmost likely because you overestimated the amount when you poured it out, courtesy of the Disney mug youâre using as a shot glass.
Go figure.
You find yourself gripping your keys and pepper spray tightly as you make the short trek to Jisung and Hyunjinâs apartment, and by the time you end up outside their door, itâs well past 9:30pm.
The pounding bass of whatever music is playing inside thrums out into the hallway, and youâre not sure if knocking is the right way to goâfrankly, youâre not sure theyâll even hear you if you do.
Not even a moment later, the door swings wide open as a drunk couple comes stumbling out, so entangled in each other that they barely notice you or the door that they leave open behind them.
âOâŠkayâŠâ You mutter. âKind of early for that, butâŠâ
Shaking your head, you walk in to find the festivities in full swing. It catches you momentarily off guard just how many people have managed to fit inside the small apartment, and the disco strobe lights are disorienting as you search around for a familiar face.
I mean, you knew it was a party, but honestly, you donât even know half the people here.
Finally, after what feels like forever, your eyes land on Jisung, and youâre so relieved that you sigh.
And then, you notice the giant grin on his face, and the very attractive girl heâs talking to. You watch as he says something, gesticulating with his hands as his eyebrows raise, and your mood sours instantly. The girl lets out a giggle, smacking his arm lightly before tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear flirtatiously, and your eyes narrow.
Something ugly twists in your gut, particularly when you notice just how close they are standing, and your teeth clench.
You know you have no right to feel jealousâyou arenât actually dating Jisung, after allâand yet the ugly pit of emotionsin the depths of your stomach that blazes despite the fact.
A boy with dark hair walks by you at that moment, obscuring your visionâheâs friends with Hyunjin, you think, his name might be Jeongin?âand you zero in on the solo cup in his hand, filled halfway with a dark liquid.
âhey,â you clear your throat, catching him before he manages to walk away. âWhere did you get that?â
âHmm?â He says, his gaze slightly unfocused and a lopsided grin on his face. âOh, drinks are in the kitchen.â
âThanksâŠâ You mutter out, barely waiting for a reply before you are stalking off in that direction.
You waste no time in grabbing a cup from the stack next to the drink station that has been set up, most likely by Changbin based on the color coding. The first bottle you see is a giant thing of rum, and you donât even hesitate before pouring a generous amount into your cup and then topping it off with some Coke.
You take a large swig, still a little astounding by the amount of people here that you donât know.
Honestly though, you are content hovering in the kitchen and avoiding human interaction for the rest of the nightâuntil you spot Felix a few feet away, heading towards you.
Your eyes widen, and without a second thought, youâre ducking out of the kitchen and back into the crowded living room, pushing through sweaty bodies to get away from him.
The thing isâyou donât have a problem with Felix. Really, you donât. In fact, he can be kind of funny to be around, most of the time. Except for when heâs drunkâhe goes absolutely nuts when intoxicated, and you do not want to be the one taking care of that tonight.
The last time you did⊠Well, letâs just say youâll never look at limes or white bedsheets the same again.
Unfortunately for you, it seems you can only avoid one person at a time tonight, because when you finally manage to shake Felix off of your tail by hiding in a back corner where youâre obscured from the view of most people, you find yourself with the perfect view of Jisung.
You find that heâs now surrounded by a gaggle of girls and a couple of guys, and he seems to be telling a very animated story based on his facial expressions.
He looks good tonight, you realizeâwith his hair slicked back like that, and those dumb black vinyl pants you bought him as a joke because they make his ass look fantastic.
You never thought he would wear them out in public, because he was so embarrassed when you made him try them on, but nowâwell, you definitely regret that purchase.
Itâs almost depressing, watching him from across the room like a lovestruck girl, when it seems just about every other girl in the room is ten times more attractive than you and checking him out too.
Itâs unfair, becauseâreally? Jisung, the dork who can barely look a girl in the eye without saying something stupid is the center of attention at this party? You think he must be at least a little tipsy, from the way he seems to actually be able to hold a normal conversation with those girls, and youâre kind of mad that itâs not you over there flirting with him.
Which is stupid. Youâre his girlfriend after allâwell, fake girlfriend. Whatever, same thing. Youâre not sure why you are over here, pouting in the corner, instead of over there by his side. In fact, youâre not even sure why you didnât just go up to him when you first got here, like a normal person.
Because no, of course you had to be weird and overthink things way more than you should.
âHeâs hot,â a voice interrupts your trail of thoughts, and your gaze snaps from Jisung to your right, where you find an attractive guy standing and observing.
âWhy donât you go talk to him?â
He looks vaguely familiar, and itâs only after a few more seconds of staring that you realize who he isâMinho, the guy that Jisung occasionally cat sits for.
âIâmâhuh?â You splutter, coughing slightly.
He leans against the wall casually, a smirk dancing across his lips, and he nods towards Jisung.
âWell, I just donât understand why youâre moping here in the corner instead of just going over there. He wonât bite⊠Probably.â
âI-Iâm not moping!â You protest.
âA-And besides,â you continue, your voice still lacking conviction. âHeâs actuallyâwell, you knowâweâre⊠dating.â
Minho raises an eyebrow as he takes a sip from his cup.
âSo youâre Y/N?â
ââŠYes?â You say back hesitantly.
âYou donât sound very sure about that.â
âW-Well, I am!â You say indignantly.
He tsks you. âOkay⊠Well, all Iâm saying is, that is not the face of someone dating the man of their dreams.â
You turn to look at Jisung, for only a second.
âHow⊠How do you know heâs the man of my dreams?â
He scoffs. âHoney, heâs the man of everyoneâs dreams.â
You tilt your head to the side, thinking about it.
âOkay, fair.â You admit.
He grins wickedly, before extending his hand.
âIâm Minho,â he introduces himself finally.
âI know,â you reply back, taking a sip of your now almost empty drink instead of shaking his hand.
He retracts it back with a smirk, not even slightly offended.
Your still watching Jisung intently, and itâs only when one of the girls heâs talking to wraps her hand around his arm and pulls him closer to her that it gets too much for you.
Abruptly, you turn to Minho.
âYou want to do shots with me?â You ask, suddenly.
âGreat.â You down the remaining contents of your cup before setting it down on a side table. Then, you grab him by his wrist and all but drag him with you to the kitchen.
You waste no time in setting up tiny red plastic cups the size of shot glassesâ2 for Minho, and 2 for youâand then youâre grabbing the tequila and pouring it into them.
âTequila?â he asks, surprised. âSo you really want to feel something, huh?â
You glare at him. âShut up and drink.â
He grins at you but complies, and the two of you throw back the shots together.
âOh, that is absolutely foul,â you say, barely able to stop yourself from gagging. Belatedly, you grab a quarter of a lime and suck on it.
âWant to do more?â
âYouâre kind of crazy,â Minho winces as he swallows. ââŠI like it.â
You shrug, already feeling tipsy, and you waste no time in refilling the cups.
You lose count of how many shots the two of you have takenâfive? maybe six?âbut it doesnât matter, because after the 3rd one, your head is already fuzzy and any thoughts of Jisung have successfully been pushed to the back of your mind.
The two of you have been arguing about various things (most of which you forget by the time you move on to the next topic), and you find that you are actually enjoying yourself.
And then, whoever is in charge of the music decides to change things up, and suddenly 3racha is blaring through the apartment and you find yourself thinking about Jisung once again.
You frown, taking a sip from a cupâjust Sprite, now, because Minho decided to cut you off a few minutes ago while you could still speak in full sentences.
âDo you like 3racha?â You yell at him over the music, and he nods eagerly.
âOh, definitely! Their stuff is really good, and itâs so cool that they go to school with us!â
Minho takes a swig from his cup, which likewise, is Sprite.
âOkay, I have a question,â you shout into his ear to be heard over all the noise. âThis could make or break our friendship, so you better answer correctly!â
Minho nods solemnly.
âWhoâs your favorite?â
âFrom 3racha?â Minho asks, pondering.
You nod, and his brow furrows as he thinks.
âHmm⊠I think theyâre all great, but I would probably have to go with CB97.â
âCB97?â You exclaim, aghast.
âIâm sorry, I thinkâŠâ You say slowly. âI think this is the end of our friendship.â
âWhat?â Minho pouts. âNo! Whoâs your favorite, then?â
âUh, J.One, of course,â you say it like itâs obvious. âThatâs the only correct answer.â
He shrugs. âI mean, yeah J.One is pretty cool, but CB97 is just unbeatable.â
You scoff.
âSure, CB97 is fine, but J.One is obviously the best!â
The two of you continue to bicker back and forthâyouâre so heated, you arenât even sure how long the two of you have been arguing.
And thatâs how Jisung finds you: drunk and angry and defending his honor.
âJ.One carries the group!â You shout as he enters the kitchen. âI think you should get your hearing re-evaluated. You might be in danger of going deaf.â
Minho opens his mouth, his response ready, but before he can bite back, Jisung has already interrupted.
âY/N!â He exclaims, barely able to hold back his laugh as he sees you, red in the face with your brow drawn taut as you glare at Minho.
âThere you are! Iâve been looking everywhere for you.â
At the sound of his voice, you come up short, and a confused look comes over your face as you turn to look at him.
âJisung?â You ask, bewildered.
âYeah, thatâs me,â he grins. âHow much have you had to drink? And how long have you been here?â
âI had 5⊠5 shots?â You tell him, holding up 8 fingers, and he narrows his eyes. âAnd also some rum and coke!â
You pick up your cup of Sprite to take a sip, but Jisung takes it from you gently.
âI donât think you should drink anymore,â he tells you. âOtherwise, youâll wake up with a killer hangover tomorrow.â
âHuh?â You say, staring at the cup. âOh! Itâs just Sprite.â
Jisung takes a sniff to confirm, before handing it back to you, embarrassed.
âOh, sorryâŠâ He mutters.
âItâs okay!â You grin cheesily. âMinho told me I should stop drinking, tooâŠâ
You point to where Minho is standing, and he gives Jisung a little wave.
âDid you know tequila is kind of gross?â You whisper, leaning in close to his ear.
âYeah,â he tells you with a laugh.
âNow,â you declare. âCan you please settle this and tell Minho that J.One is obviously the best in 3racha?â
He raises an eyebrow, amused.
âYou think J.One is the best?â
You frown. âYeah, obviously. I have to stay loyal, after all. I canât just change my mind mid argument, can I?â
Jisung lets out a laugh, and Minhoâs eyes flit between the two of you.
âWellâIâm just going to get something else to drink from, um, over there,â he motions vaguely off to the right, before giving you a long meaningful look that you donât quite understand.
âSee you later!â And then heâs gone, leaving the two of you in the kitchen alone.
âSo Iâm guessing youâve been here for a while,â Jisung says a second later, and your gaze snaps to his face.
âHmm?â You hum distractedly. âOh. Yeah, probably? I think soâŠâ
âWhy didnât you come find me?â He says, his brow furrowed as he looks you in the eye.
The music is thrumming, the lights are dim, and all you can think about is how hot you feel. Why is it so hot in here?
âWhat?â You ask, still a little disoriented.
Jisung runs a hand through his hair, and you find yourself staring at him. The top to buttons of his shirt are undone, and you can see his collarbones peeking out as he pushes his hair back. You find yourself mesmerized.
âI-I mean,â Jisung says, a blush rising to his cheeks. âI was waiting for youâŠâ
Youâre so blatantly checking him out that you donât notice how embarrassed he looks at the confession, and you barely manage to catch what he says.
âOh,â you murmur, your eyes now focused on his hand. âWell, I mean, you looked busy when I got here and I didnât want to be a bother.â
âWhat do you mean?â He asks, confused.
You stare, thinking itâs obvious enough.
âWell, first it was that really tall girl, with the highlights,â you begin listing, counting on your fingers as you go. âThen it was that guy in the muscle tee⊠And then it was the other girl, in your econ class. I just didnât want to interruptâŠâ
âYou wouldnât have been interrupting,â Jisung mutters. âI mean, youâre my girlfriend.â
âFake girlfriend,â you chime helpfully.
His expression falls, almost imperceptibly.
âRight. Of courseâŠâ
Youâre oblivious to it all, too intoxicated to notice the slight shift in his mood.
âSo, how has your party been so far, birthday boy?â You grin, nudging him slightly with your shoulder.
âItâs been nice,â He responds distractedly.
âDid Hyunjin make you do shots with him?â You ask curiously. âHe was, like, really excited about making you do that.â
Jisung wrinkles his nose.
âUgh, yeah,â he groans. âThat was not fun. My liver is going to be gone before I even graduate.â
âBoo, donât be such a wimp!â You exclaim. âShots are fun.â
Jisung opens his mouth, about to bite back a response, but before he canâsomeone comes barreling in your direction, tackling him in a hug that leaves him stumbling a few steps back.
âJisung!â It takes him a moment to realize the person whoâs hugging the life out of him is Yuna.
âYuna,â he chokes out, startled with his hands hanging by his side awkwardly.
âSo?â She says, grinning as she pulls back. âHowâs your day been? Excited to finally turn five?â
Jisung rolls his eyes. âIf Iâm five, that must mean youâre four, huh?â
âYuna!â You exclaim belatedly, finally realizing who she is.
She turns to look at you, and Jisung swears her eyes light up as she launches herself at you.
âY/N! Iâve been looking for you! I missed you,â she says as she wraps her arms lovingly around youâvery unlike the anaconda chokehold she had held Jisung in only a few moments before.
âI missed you too,â you pout as you return the hug.
Jisungâs face scrunches up in confusion.
âDonât you guys live together?â
Yuna waves him off. âYeah. Your point is?â
ââŠNevermind,â he mutters wisely after a few moments.
âSo,â Yuna says, raising an eyebrow. âhow have the two of you been?â
âGood!â You say cheerfully, your voice pitching up a little bit higher than you mean for it to.
Yunaâs gaze is one that can kill, and the way sheâs looking at the two of youâa mischievous smirk on her face⊠It makes Jisung uncomfortable.
âY-Yeah,â Jisung stutters, his hand finding yours and gripping it tightly. âYou know⊠Doing couples stuff, being a couple⊠All of that.â
Your roommate raises an eyebrow, amused.
âReally?â
âOh, definitely,â you nod seriously, and she lets out a short laugh.
âYou two really are perfect for each other,â Yuna says, shaking her head. âI just canât believe it took you both this long to realize it.â
You frown at the implication of her words, focusing so hard on the part where she says the two of you are perfect for each other, that you miss the way Jisung clears his throat awkwardly and stares daggers at Yuna.
âI guessâŠâ you say slowly, your brows knit together.
âWell!â Yuna exclaims, clasping her hands together. âI just wanted to wish you a happy birthday, but thereâs a dance floor that is calling my name. Hyunjin bet me that I couldnât out dance him, and you know I never back down. Iâll see you guys later!â
She waves as she goes, and the two of you watch even as she disappears into the crowd.
âSoâŠâ Jisung begins jokingly a few moments later.
âI guess weâre just perfect for each other, huh?â
Youâre drunk enough that you canât tell whether he meant for his words to come out sounding so bitter, and if you had been more sober, you probably would have questioned it.
But youâre not, and so your mind passes over it onto the next thought: namely, the one that has been running through your mind the entire nightâhow attractive Jisung looks right now.
You donât know why, but no matter how hard you try, you canât stop yourself from staring. Granted, you arenât really trying all that hard.
And, if youâre being honest, itâs his fault for looking so goodâŠ
âY/N?â Jisung waves his hand in front of your face when you donât answer.
And then, against your will, your mind flashes to all the pretty girls he was talking to tonightâfirst, the one he was talking to when you walked in at the beginning, who he was grinning at like she was the funniest girl in the world. And then, later, when he was surrounded by a whole harem of them, all flirting with him.
At those thoughts, something ugly rears its head inside your heart. You didnât really think you were the type to get jealous before tonight. Frankly, you donât even have a reason to be jealous.
Heâs not actually your boyfriend, what right do you have to care about who he talks to and flirts with?
âAre you okay?â Jisung asks, concerned as you stare off into space.
And then another thought occurs to youâwhy is he so dense? For two years, youâve had the biggest crush on him, and not once has Jisung noticed. Youâve been pining after him hopelessly, and when he finally makes a romantic advanceâitâs to fake a relationship for his convenience?
âY/N?â He repeats your name once more, and this time, your gaze snaps to his face.
Youâre not sure what it is that spurs you into action. Jealousy, exasperation, maybe even just plain anger at him and the circumstances heâs put you in.
Although, if youâre being honest, itâs probably mostly the alcohol thatâs rushing through your blood that makes you do it, but before you can second guess yourself, your hands go to cup Jisungâs face, and then youâre yanking him down to your height and pressing your lips firmly against him.
At first, you meant for it to be chaste and short. Just a simple and impulsive peck that is meant forâclosure, maybe? You arenât really sure. Itâs not supposed to be anything more than a small playground peck, mostly because heâs so infuriating and you canât focus on anything but his lips, and you just need to get it out of your system.
But then, youâre close enough to feel his breath, hot and light against your lips. He smells like cotton and lemon with a hint of vodka, and his eyesâwhen you look into them, they are dark and confused and even a little concerned too, and before you know it, youâre throwing all caution to the wind and kissing him.
Youâre really, truly kissing him, the way youâve dreamt of so many times.
Itâs frenzied and sloppy, and really not that great because you are both too drunk to focus on accuracy, but your hands snake around the nape of his neck and you find yourself lacing your fingers through his hair as your eyes slide shut. You hate yourself a little bit, because you enjoy it so much.
But the worst part of it?
The worst part is that Jisung kisses you back. It takes him a few seconds to react, but then his hands are on your waist, gripping tightly as he pulls you closer and melts into your lips. You donât even know how long the two of you stand there, completely absorbed in each other.
Even as you break the kiss, your hands stay wrapped around his neck, just as his hands stay firmly on your waist. Your foreheads are pressed together, and there is this dumb little grin stretched across his face.
It takes you both a moment to process. But then, Jisung is whispering to you, almost breathless, âwhat was that for?â
You look up into his eyes to find them wide and curious, anticipating your response.
Itâs then that you realize what youâve just done.
âUm,â you breathe other a moment later, your voice thick and your head swimming with confusion. âHappy birthday?â
âThanks,â he grins a little, but then his expression drops when he sees the panic in your eyes.
âYeah,â you say awkwardly, stepping back from him even as your throat closes up.
Holy shit, holy shit, holy shit, you just kissed him.
âIâmâI have to go pee,â you say dumbly.
âOkay,â Jisung tells you softly.
And then you walk out of the kitchen, to the bathroomâwhere you pause for a moment, before continuing past it, to the door and out of the apartment.
You donât stop until you get home.
You spend the next week avoiding Jisung.
Itâs not easy, mind youâbut you still manage to do it. In between the texts and phone calls from not only him but various members of your friend group, you somehow are able to hide, almost as if you donât exist at all.
Thatâs not the hard part though. No, the hard part is avoiding Yuna. You leave for your classes early in the morning and come home late at night in a desperate grab at not running into her. The âDo Not Disturbâ setting on your phone is permanently set to on, and you go out of your way to study only in the archaeology library, despite how far away it is from your apartment.
Youâre like a ghost in the wind, the way that you make yourself scarce, and the only person you speak to is Hyunjinâmostly because heâs the one person you canât seem to avoid.
He is your best friend, after all, and when the two of you share almost every class, it makes it impossible to avoid him.
But, to your surprise, you find that he doesnât press you at all. Over the course of the week, not once does he bring up Jisung or the party on Friday, and you would think that he hasnât noticed anything out of the blue if it wasnât for the way he strategically avoids mentioning any of your friends.
You canât help but love him for it. He doesnât ask for answers, even once, and you are reminded once again why heâs your best friend.
You are a wreck for so many reasons that you canât help but wrap your head around, and the only thing that keeps you together is that Hyunjin continues to joke about the stupidest things as if you both donât know that you are seconds away from falling apart.
But, come Friday, it seems your luck has run out.
When you arrive home in the early evening, you find Yuna sitting in the living room, her arms crossed as if sheâs waiting. Well, obviously you know that logically, sheâs waiting for you. But hey⊠It could be something else, right?
Wrong, if the pointed glare she pins you with is anything to go off of.
âSit,â she says shortly.
Timidly, you listen. Really, all you want to do is run back into your room and lock the door butâwell, sheâs scary and you think she might bust down your door right off its hinges if you do that.
âS-SoâŠâ You stammer awkwardly. âWhatâs up?â
You wince right as the words leave your mouth. Why are you like this? Itâs like recently, you canât do anything right. With school, with your friends⊠With Jisung.
She stares at you pointedly.
âI donât know, why donât you tell me?â
âThereâs nothing up with me,â you say, trying to keep your face blank as your head turns downward and you pick at the loose thread hanging from the hem of your shirt.
âReally?â Yuna asks, an eyebrow raised. She doesnât sound convinced at all, but you pretend you donât notice.
âNope,â you respond again. âWhy? Is there something wrong?â
âYeah, actually,â she says calmly. âItâs just that there is this girl I know who seems to be avoiding all her friends and her boyfriend without any explanation, and nobody can figure out whatâs wrong.â
âOh? Well, maybe sheâs fine and doesnât need anyone to worry about her. She could be just a little tired after a long week, donât you think?â
âTired doesnât mean ignoring everyone she knows,â Yuna points out.
You look down, examining your fingernails. They are short, bitten stubsâa product of your recent spike in anxiety. You pick at a hangnail on your thumb before you answer.
âMaybe tired to her means socializing less to conserve energy.â
A moment passes, and you can feel her glare burning into the side of your head, but you donât look up.
âY/N.â She says finally, breaking the silence. âPlease. Talk to me.â
âI am talking,â you say shortly.
âThatâs not what I mean,â Yuna emphasizes firmly. âWhatâs wrong?â
âNothing is,â you repeat. âEverything is fine and dandy. Iâm doing great. Couldnât be better, in fact.â
She sighs heavily.
âWhat happened with you and Jisung?â
You still.
âJisung?â Your voice wobblesâbarely, but you know itâs enough for Yuna to notice. âWhy would you think something happened with Jisung?â
âBecause heâs been a wreck since his birthday, and youâve been avoiding everyone, and there is something weird about it all.â
Your breath catches in your throat when she says that. The first thought that pops into your head is, is he okay?
Itâs followed quickly by why is he a wreck? and did I fuck up so badly that I broke him?
âHasnât he said whatâs wrong with him?â You ask, trying to be nonchalant even as you can feel the panic rising in your throat. âBecause I think heâs the only one with an issue right now. Not me. Definitely not me.â
âY/N,â Yuna sighs again. âHeâs your boyfriend, and thereâs something up with both of you. Did he do something? Please, tell me whatâs wrong so I can help.â
Boyfriend. The word echoes in your head, bouncing around until it threatens to engulf you completely. Itâs parasitic, the way it burns through you.
A moment passes, and youâre frozen.
Then,
âHeâs not my boyfriend.â
Your voice is heartbreakingly soft, and Yuna is surprised to find that when you look up and your eyes finally meet hers, they are glassy with unshed tears.
âWhat?â
âI said,â you choke out. âHeâs not my boyfriend.â
And then youâre crying.
âOh, Y/N,â Yuna says soothingly, pulling you closer and wrapping her arms around you.
You turn, burying your face into her shoulder as hot, scalding tears run down your face. She runs a hand down your head, smoothing your hair in a calming and repetitive movement, and you let go of the emotions you have been holding back for the past 7 days.
You cry and you cry and you cry until you feel like you have nothing left to give, and then you just let Yuna hold you for a moment.
And then, you pull back after what seems like forever, and tell her about everything.
Okay, soânot everything. You definitely donât tell her about Jisung and 3racha, but you tell her everything else. How youâve had a crush on him for forever, and how you both ended up somehow faking a relationship, and how youâre feelings for him only continued to grow throughout it, and then you tell her about the party, and how you kissed him and fucked everything up, because there is no way he feels anything for youâespecially because heâs been avoiding you the same way you have been avoiding him.
Yuna listens attentively and doesnât interrupt once, and when you finish speaking finally, your tears have mostly dried.
âYou donât hate me⊠Do you?â Your voice is small and vulnerable.
âNo,â she says decidedly. âI could never hate you for something like this.â
âThank you,â you whisper, a watery smile barely present on your face as she hugs you again.
âDo you⊠Do you think I fucked it all up?â
Yuna shakes her head firmly. âNo. I know you didnât.â
You arenât too sure if you believe her, but the words are comforting either way.
âYou know what?â Yuna says determinedly after a moment. âI think you need something to get your mind off of this all. To clear your head, you know? Itâll make you feel better.â
You look at her skeptically, your eyes already beginning to puff up.
âYes,â she nods excitedly to herself. âTomorrow, Iâm taking you on a date so you can stop thinking about him!â
âOh, Yuna, I donâtââ You sniffle but she cuts you off.
âNope! Iâve decided already! Youâre heartsick, and this is just what the doctor ordered.â
ââŠOkay?â
âGreat!â She grins at you. âNow, why donât you take a shower and go to sleep? You look like youâre about to pass out any minute.â
âYeah,â you say faintly as she drags you up from the couch and pushes you in the direction of your bedroom. âOkay.â
After a quick, scalding shower, you lay in bed and fall asleep quickly. You sleep fitfully and contently the entire night through, and when you wake up the next morning, it is to Yuna packing up a wicker basket in the kitchen.
âYouâre awake!â She exclaims when she notices you come out of your room.
âGet dressed,â Yuna singsongs, folding a giant gingham sheet. âWeâre going on a picnic! I put a lot of effort into this so you better put on something cute or Iâll murder you.â
You find that, against all odds, you somehow feel better than you did last night, even if only marginally.
Crying it out of your system will do that to you, you suppose as you head back into your room to pick out an outfit that will pass Yunaâs inspection.
It doesnât take long for you to settle in a simple white cotton dress. You tie your hair back with a matching ribbon, and put on a bit of concealer under your eyes to hide any evidence of what happened last night.
When you emerge from your room, you find Yuna waiting eagerly at the door, a giant floppy straw hat on her head.
âLetâs go!â She says excitedly. Despite yourself, you find a small smile creeping onto your face. Maybe this isnât such a bad idea, after all.
You donât really know where you are going, because Yuna has planned it all out to the tee, but she chats the whole bus ride there, and for the first time all week, you feel like you can breathe.
30 minutes later, the two of you find yourselves on the banks of the Han river, spreading out a blanket to sit upon.
Then, youâre reaching into the wicker basket Yuna has brought along, pulling out small boxes full of comfort foodârice cakes, fried rice, noodles⊠Your heart warms as you think of her in the kitchen, cooking all of this food for you.
You really love your friends.
âRice, japchae, beefâŠâ Yuna mutters to herself, doing a tally of everything that has been laid out.
âIs there nothing else in the basket?â She turns to you, hopeful. You look inside, and then shake your head.
âNo, itâs empty.â
âFuck, I forgot waterâŠâ
Then, her eyes light up.
âIâll be right back, okay? Iâm just going to the convenience store to get something to drink.â
âOkay,â you nod to her.
And then sheâs running off, her hat wobbling in a hilarious way as she goes.
You pull your knees into your chest and observe around you as you wait for her to come back. A small toddler runs past you, with his mother close behind, begging him to slow down. A few feet away, 3 middle school boys are riding their bikes and eating ice pops as they go. An elderly couple are resting on a bench that overlooks the river.
Then, your eyes fall onto the ducks. You light up immediately, searching the wide picnic spread until you find what you were looking forâbread.
Youâre overly excited as you grab the bag of bread and practically skip over to the ducks. They watch you curiously as you bend down a few feet away from them. You start to break off small pieces of the bread and throw them down in between you and the ducks, and they happily swarm the food you offer.
You giggle as you watch a mother duck push her chick towards a small piece of bread that you have thrown out. The baby ducks are always the cutest, you canât help but think.
âTheyâre adorable, arenât they?â A familiar voice says from behind you, and you freeze. Your blood turns ice cold, and your head snaps around.
And there he is, in the fleshâHan Jisung, standing awkwardly only a few feet away from you.
You stare. Heâs dressed casually, in a loose white shirt and black jeans, and itâs crazy how he looks the same as youâve always seem him, and yet so different at the same time. His hair is brushed back, and to your surpriseâa deep, berry blue, but what shocks you the most is the timid, almost unsure expression on his face.
A moment passes, and thenâyouâre pushing yourself up and briskly walking past him without a word, trying to get as far away as possible.
âWait, Y/Nâwait!â He calls out, but you ignore him.
âY/N,â he jogs, and it doesnât take long before heâs in front of you, effectively cutting off your escape route.
You stop in your tracks, but continue to stare off behind his head, as if you canât see him at all.
âCan we talk?â He asks.
âWe donât have anything to talk about,â you say stiffly.
âUm, I think we have a lot to talk about,â he disagrees, his brow furrowing.
You think itâs cuteâat least, you would, if you were looking at him. But youâre not, and so you donât.
âWell I donât have anything to talk to you about,â you say, tone short and sharp.
âThatâs fine,â Jisung sighs. âThatâs fine, because I can do the talking. But will you listen?â
You stare off in the direction Yuna had run off in, desperately hoping for her to appear. Predictably, she doesnât, and so instead of answering, you continue to stare pointedly at anything but the boy in front of you.
He takes that as a yes.
âLook,â he looks a little exasperated as he runs a hand through his hair. âI know that we started this whole thing so we could, I dunno, keep up a lie that I got us wrapped up into. And I know you got all freaked out last week whenâwell, when that thing happened, which is why Iâve been giving you spaceâŠâ
You still refuse to look at him, but your eyes trail from a giant light pole behind him to where a family of four are sitting under the shade of a giant tree.
âI mean,â Jisung continues on. âI thought space is what you needed, for a bit. But youâre still ignoring me and freaking out, which is why Iâm here to tell you thatâwell, to tell you that I like you.â
He says it so sincerely that itâs enough for you to finally look at him.
âHa, ha,â you say sarcastically, finally speaking. âThatâs funny. Now, are you done? Iâm kind of busy right now.â
âWhat?â His nose scrunches in confusion, and your heart skips a beat, which you promptly ignore.
âNo, Y/N. I like you. A lot.â
The familiar feeling of panic starts to well up in your stomach, and your gaze hardens.
âYou like me?â You say, your face twisting cruelly as you look at his earnest, pleading eyes.
âYes,â he says solemnly. âI do. I have for a long time, actuallyâŠâ
Your throat burns. âJisung, stop it.â
âWhy?â He asks, bewildered.
âBecause!â You hiss. âI know youâre doing this for 3racha and to keep it a secret, which is fine, I know you are. Itâs what weâve been doing since the beginning, of course I know you are, but⊠But youâre being mean right now.â
âHow?â His frustration bleeds into his words. âY/N, Iâm telling you that I like you! This has nothing to do with 3racha.â
You scoff.
âYou donât believe me?â Jisung demands. âIâm serious. Iâve already told Yuna everything! I literally have nothing to lose,â he laughs, and it borders on maniacal.
âExcept you, of course, because my feelings for you are so real itâs kind of starting to hurt!â
âWhat did you say?â You whisper faintly.
He sighs. âOn Monday, when it became obvious you were avoiding me, I went to Yuna, andâwell I told her about 3racha, and what you were doing to help me keep that secret, because I wanted her advice on how toâŠâ
He trails off, suddenly nervous. You stare foggily at him, half unsure if youâre breathing still.
âHow to what?â You ask after a moment.
âHow to ask you out, for real.â
âYou told Yuna?â
He nods. âThatâs why Iâm here... I asked her to set this up.â
âOh.â
âYeah,â he echoes. âOh.â
A moment passes. You feel warm all over. He told Yuna the truth⊠Does that meanâŠ? Heâs telling the truth?
âSo,â you start. âLet me get this straight. You told Yuna the truth about your biggest secret, and⊠You like me?â
âI do, like you. A lot. A lot a lot.â
His eyes bore into yours.
âOkay,â you say weakly.
âOkay?â He asks. âI was⊠Kind of hoping for something more than okay.â
Instead of responding to that, you find yourself staring at his hair.
âItâs very blue,â you tell him, reaching out to touch it.
âWhat?â Jisung says, as if heâs forgotten. âOh, yeah. It is.â
âYou look like a blueberry,â you murmur, still entranced by how soft his hair is. âWhy did you dye it?â
A blush rises to his cheeks, and he looks away quickly as he murmurs something inaudibly.
âWhat? I didnât hear what you said.â
âWell,â he begins bashfully, his entire face red at this point. âYou had said⊠The day you date me is the day I dye my hair blue, soâŠâ
You retract your hand, your mind going back to that Thursday in the closet, when the two of you had been hiding from Yuna.
âI did say that, didnât I?â You muse.
He nods.
âSo?â You ask, expectantly.
âWhat?â Jisung is quick to get defensive.
âArenât you going to ask me out?â
âB-But,â he begins cluelessly. âYou donât⊠Like me back, do you?â
It takes a moment to process the words, and your jaw drops open slightly. You donât know how to react to thatâyou donât know what to do, or what to say. A flurry of emotions overcome you, but itâs easiest to pick out anger, and so you do the first thing that comes to mind.
You punch him.
âOw!â Jisung yelps, pouting as he rubs his shoulder.
âYou absolute buffoon!â You explode in anger. âWho initiated that kiss on your birthday? Was it you? No, I donât think it was. Of course I like you! Iâve liked you since I met you, you fucking idiot! Why would you think I donât like you? You are quite possibly the stupidest person to exist. It takes a special kind of person to be so oblivious you don't notice someone crushing on you for two years! I was so obvious too!â
He stares at you, flabbergasted.
Now itâs his turn to parrot you. âYou like⊠me?â
You glare at him.
âAsk me,â you demand.
âDo you like me?â He repeats, and your eyes narrow.
âWrong question,â you grit out.
His eyes widen as his mouth forms a silent âo.ââ
âDo youâŠâ He begins.
âWill you be my girlfriend?â Jisung asks finally, voice soft as he stares at you in wonder.
âYes, you dummy!â You yell.
You want to smack him for being stupid, but you decide to kiss him insteadâand this time, you find itâs everything you remember it to be and so much more.
âFor the record,â Jisung says when the two of you break away, a stupid grin on his face as he slips his hand into yours. âIâve liked you since I met you, too.â
âReally?â You look at him weirdly. âI threatened you with a frying pan.â
âYeah, you looked kind of crazy,â he nods. âBut it was hot, like, in a psycho kind of way.â
A look of disgust passes over your face, and you push him away.
âYouâre disturbed,â you tell him. âI donât think I want to date you anymore.â
âHey!â He protests. âIt hasnât even been five minutes!â
âI didnât know you were so weird, though,â you mimic vomiting, but donât resist when he grabs your hand again.
The two of you head back to the picnic blanket you had been at before, only to find Yuna sitting there with at least ten water bottles surrounding her.
Her eyes flit to your linked hands as the two of you approach.
âSo,â she says mischievously. âWhat did I miss?â
âJisung,â you sigh. âJust show me the picture. Iâll see it sooner or later!â
He pouts as he holds his phone away from you. âNo, I look bad.â
Itâs currently a Saturday afternoon, with winter break just around the corner, and you and your friends are hanging out at Jisung and Hyunjinâs apartment.
âBabe,â you soothe him. âI promise, you donât look bad.â
âYes I do.â
âHan Jisung, give me the phone.â You frown.
âNo,â he says stubbornly, shaking his head, and you grab his ear.
âOw, ow!â He yelps, but you just twist ruthlessly.
âYouâve seen my ugly baby pictures,â you tell him, âso show me yours.â
âOkay, okay, fine!â He relents, and you let go of his ear, satisfied.
âBut⊠You have to promise not to laugh.â
âI promise,â you say solemnly, and a moment later, heâs handing his phone to you hesitantly.
Excited, you snatch it from his hand, and he buries his face in your shoulder, embarrassed.
Youâve barely even glanced at the photo before you have to resist the urge to snort, but Jisung feels the vibration in your chest, and he lifts his head up to glare at you.
âYou promised you wouldnât laugh!â
âAnd I didnât,â you clear your throat, pressing your lips together to suppress the smile from creeping onto your face.
âI told you I look bad, I shouldnât have even let you see,â he whines and tries to snatch his phone back from you, but you hold it away from him.
âNo!â You tell him. âI think itâs⊠cute.â
âYouâre lying,â he accuses, and you canât resist cupping his cheek with your free hand. He always looks so cute when he pouts.
âWellâŠâ You say slyly. âIâve always had a think for you in glasses.â
He groans, flopping backwards onto the couch, and you finally let out a laugh.
âItâs not that bad, Jisung, I promise!â You coo. âI think youâre adorable, even as an awkward preteen with a really bad haircut.â
âDonât talk to me,â he grumbles, his words muffled as a result of being smushed face-first into the couch, and you continue to fawn over him.
Opposite to the two of you, Hyunjin and Yuna watch on in a sort of disgusted fascination, absolutely appalled by the romantic display and yet wholly unable to look away as you give Jisung a smooch on the cheek.
âThis is so grossâŠâ Hyunjin whispers to Yuna.
âMaybe it was better when they werenât datingâŠâ Yuna mutters back.
Youâre now scrolling through Jisungâs camera roll as he tries to take his phone back from you, and Hyunjin canât help but nod in agreement.
âYou know⊠If you think about it, this is all kind of thanks to you,â he says to Yuna, and she snorts.
âKind of?â She raises an eyebrow. âOh, Iâm definitely taking credit for this.â
âWhat?â
âYou think all of this just happened by chance?â She gestures to you and Jisung. âI mean, I didnât think Jisung would take it this far, but⊠Well, letâs just say heâs never been good at hiding things.â
She smirks. âHis feelings for Y/N⊠Or his identity as J.One.â
Hyunjin gapes.
âJisung has a habit of leaving his SoundCloud logged in when he lends me his laptop,â she explains.
ââŠPlease, remind me to never keep secrets from you,â Hyunjin mutters under his breath, only slightly terrified.
On the couch across from them, Â Jisung has finally managed to take his phone back from you. You wrap your arms around his waist, burying your face in his chest as you let out a sigh.
Lazily, his arm wraps around you and he pulls you closer, his nose in your hair.
âWhat?â He mumbles, the words muffled by your head.
âMm, sânothing,â you say.
A moment of silence passes, and muted voices from the TV echo. Your face warms, and impulsively, your arms tighten around his torso as if trying to snuggle further into him.
âWhat is it?â He asks again, his tone playful.
Thereâs a beat of silence. You turn your face away from his so he canât see you, and then:
âYouâre so skinny.â
âYeah,â he says sarcastically back. âI know. Youâre always calling me a noodle boy, after all.â
You grin.
âYeah, but youâre my noodle boy,â you say affectionately, and Yuna almost gags.
âOkay,â Hyunjin announces, horrified. âThatâs enough PDA for one day!â
You stick out your tongue at him, and Jisung shows him his middle finger.
âYouâre just jealous,â you tease.
âItâs okay, Hyunjin,â Jisung says solemnly. âMaybe one day someone will get past your annoying personality and catch feelings for you, too.â
Hyunjin lets out a strangled groan.
âCan we leave? Please?â He begs Yuna.
âAlready two steps ahead of you,â she mutters, slinging her bag over her shoulder before waving to you and Jisung.
âBye!â
And then sheâs walking out the door.
âYuna!â Hyunjin scrambles after her desperately. âWait for me!â
(in case you were wondering what the picture of jisung looks like: see below)
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
â Live Streamingâ Interactive Chatâ Private Showsâ HD Qualityâ Free Actions
Free to watch âą No registration required âą HD streaming
description: han jisung can charm any heart if he wants to but he just wants one, whether he admits it to your face or not.Â
member: jisung / han
genre: fluff, fantasy, rivals to lovers au, childhood friends to lovers au, witch / wizard au (sugar sugar rune-inspired), royal au, college au, roommates / housemates au, slice of life format, a side of hwang siblings, sunshine twins, cousin chan, and minchan (!!)
word count: 25.1k iâm so sorry
warnings: explicit language, alcohol, some mentions of injuries, a brief episode of someone getting abducted, mentions of a creep being,,,well a creep at public transportation, self-indulgent tooth-rotting cheesiness, idk if i should put a warning for unconscious emotional manipulation but im gonna write that in here anw
note:Â idk if i want to write little drabbles w this same pairing again since it ended up being so long but i kinda lost the plot halfway lmao lmk if u guys want additional lil drabbles for this hehe + again happy 1k yay!
You donât always get along with Han Jisung, crown prince of the Eastern Kingdom, for reasons you simply can't limit to the number of fingers and toes that you have. He loves annoying you for the sake of getting a reaction, bratty as far as a wizard prince goes, and prideful among many traits that you were forced to grow up alongside with.
These days, however, you hate the way that he is the only other candidate alongside yourself for the High Crown of the magical world. As if fate didn't just want the two of you to butt heads in school and at royal social functions all the time, suddenly you're pushed to compete with him for something much greater.
For the record, though, it's tradition that all firstborn heirs of the 4 major kingdoms are considered eligible for the highest throne that unites all of your domains. You were going to compete with him either way, just with other people initially involved. However, with prince Hyunjin of the Southern kingdom mysteriously disappearing over a month ago and princess Lia of the Western kingdom subsequently refusing the candidacy, suddenly there was only you and the Eastern prince for the high jury to challenge in their Crown Candidacy exam. Fate and circumstance clearly love you with the way Jisung is always in your line of sight when all you want for yourself is to not be on the receiving end of his teasings and competititve streak all the time.
Though you yourself didn't desire the High Crown at first, the elders continuously pressuring you eventually pushed you into accepting the task. Plus, knowing that it's Jisungâthe brat who pulled on your hair during those silly etiquette lessons the high jury made you and the other royals take as kids and embarrassed you when you once confessed your past crush to him in middle schoolâwho would be automatically crowned without a test if Hyunjin isn't found in time and you also refuse made you go forward with it. After all, as much as you personally don't want to answer to Jisung as the next High King, you also think that entrusting the entire magical realm to him is simply not right. You would know, you had to grow up with him.
So, here you are on the night that the Crown Candidacy exam begins, receiving the final blessing from your mother and the high jury with Jisung who has been sneakily trying to poke on your side and get a reaction out of you since the ceremony began. If 15 elders and your mentors aren't surrounding the two of you with their scrutinizing eyes right this very moment, you would've easily snapped on the first poke and blasted the blue-haired boy.
"Stop that," You instead gritted your teeth next to him with the 17th poke to your waist, lowering your voice that only he can hear. "Ji, I swear to the godsâ"
Among the circle of witches and wizards chanting ritual protection spells over the two of you, your mentor Younghyun glares at you and Jisung as if in a non-verbal scolding that the two of you should stop "playing around" as he would usually word it. You simply roll your eyes at this in response, earning you more quizzical looks from the other elders.
You also hate the way that Han Jisung keeps stringing you into his antics as his favourite person to mess with. If anything, you're most often in trouble with the elders because of him.
"This part of the ceremony is so unnecessary. I'm bored" He murmurs tiredly under his breath, bringing his hands back inside his black cape and pushing his shoulders back as he stands up straighter once more. "It's not like humans can hurt us. We're the magical ones, hello? Besides, the juryâs already cut the one-year exam by half. What could even happen in that time?â
"Stray monsters can still hunt you there if you donât stand still." You correct immediately, earning you a look from your own mother this time as she finishes leading the last of the spells. At this point in your unwanted association with him, you don't even care much anymore that you get in trouble because you entertain his antics. You just want him to shut up. "Whatever. It's done."
The prince then giddily springs up in place once all of the spells are casted, suddenly looking more awake than the past 5 minutes of ceremony. "Finally! Okay, thanks for that! We'll be going now!"
"Wait." Your mother calmly interrupts him, perfectly hiding her slight annoyance over you and Jisung as she whips out her blue wand from the pockets of her ceremonial robes. "For the high jury to properly tally the ecure that you'll collect in the human world after this task, we'll be providing you with vessels to keep them."
As she mentions the vessels, a sapphire locket and an emerald ring materialize in front of you and Jisung respectively before settling at the palms of your hands. You're then quick to notice the way that the diamond-cut sapphire encrusted at the center of your locket emits warmth as you place it around your neck, indicating its magical properties.
"These vessels have been modified further to record everything that you collect and any spell or potion that you might use them on while undertaking in this task." Your mother then continues. Simultaneously, Younghyun gestures for you and Jisung to mount your brooms and prepare to fly off into the yellow crescent moon where the portal to the human world lies on its other side. "Though the ecure that you lose is not counted in the final tally, knowing how you used or lost them also contributes to the jury's examination of your magical skills and knowledge."
Jisung chuckles, bumping the bristle end of his broom with yours playfully. "And to see what kind of trouble we'll get ourselves into, right?"
In response, you simply roll your eyes. Your mother, on the other hand, purposely tunes out Jisung's usual antics and continues, "Remember, this exam will determine the next monarch that unites all of the 4 major domains. Collect as much ecure as you can from the humans in the 6 months that you're given with them and you will be rewarded greatly. Until then, have a safe journey to the human world, candidates."
With that, you and Jisung push yourselves off from the castle balcony, heading straight to the crescent moon.
"Last to the other side is a lousy flyer!" Jisung yells playfully into the quiet night, speeding ahead before you could even process his words. âAnd has to pay for a meal sometime!â
"Ya! Han Jisung!" You increase your speed yourself anyway despite knowing that his words donât have any ill meaning, catching up to him with ease just as the two of you pass into the portal. âI paid for the meals last time!âÂ
-
Han Jisung isn't always fond of you, the heir to the Northern Kingdom, for reasons he simply can't limit to the number of fingers and toes that he has. He thinks you're too uptight (especially in the presence of the high jury and the other elders of the bigger royal circle), easily irritable, and surprisingly a bit of a pushover to your kingdom's advisors ever since your cousin, Chan, renounced his royal title and settled in the human world.
These days, however, he hates the way that you've suddenly taken up an interest in competing for the high crown of the magical world alongside him even when you've made it clear countless times before that you only wanted to rule your own kingdom. You only started showing interest after Lia formally refused her candidacy and the elders pushed you more into changing your mind, clearly hinting that you don't want Jisung to automatically be crowned High King.
Do they really think that terribly of me? Jisung has resorted to thinking a lot about these days, even now as the two of you arrive at Chanâs place where you would be staying for the duration of the test. I make a good high king as much as I do the king of my own people! Hmp!
It shouldn't bother him this much, it's just you anyway. But at the same time, it bothers him for this very same reason: because it's you, the know-it-all who always busted his antics to the teachers back in school and embarrassed him to his friends when you confessed your past crush to him back in middle school. Jisung hates the way you challenge and compel him to be petty and competitive all the time, especially in the little things. Like right now, as the two of you argue on who gets the bigger bedroom in Chan's house right after you arrived.
"You know, I was just holding back a while ago because we were in front of the elders but I swear, I won't hesitate to blast you now that we're away." You warn as you try your best to stare him down while he blocks the bedroom door you both want. You have your hands raised to the side, sparks of a spell encircling our fingers and the space between your hands. "Move, Jisung!"
Still, Jisung stubbornly refuses. You two have bickered enough to last you all of your lifetimes and for him to know that you won't really do it. "I was here first! You go to the other room!"
The blue ball of energy in your hands begins to shape itself into a more tangible shape as your brows furrow even deeper in frustration. "But I called dibs on this room to Chan firsâ!"
Before you could finish your words, however, Chan peeks his head out from the opposite end of the hallway with a pile of blankets in his hands. "You two still going at it? It's almost 2 AM." He teases in feigned disapproval, approaching the two of you to throw a blanket each of your way. "Come on, give it up, Sung. Y/N gets the big room."
Jisung's initial smug expression contorts into disbelief in an instant while you celebrate with a wide grin and a teasing tongue stuck out at him. "What?!"
"Ha! Thanks, Channie!" You clasp your hands together in satisfaction, the red sparks in your hands disappearing into thin air as you do so, before pushing the paralyzed Jisung out of the way and locking yourself in the bedroom. Once Jisung's pulled himself together at the betrayal, you then briefly peek your head out of the door, sticking your tongue out for the last time before greeting the two boys with a quick, "Goodnight!"
Jisung glares and purses his lips in front of Chan who chuckles at this. "Hyung!" He whines, grabbing the older boy by his biceps and shaking him wildly like how a child would throw a tantrum. "I don't see you for three years and when I do, I get treated like this?!"
"Exactly." Chan nods with an amused smile, tugging Jisung to his side and leading him to his room across from yours. "Y/N was kind enough to visit me here while you didn't even send a letter. I think that's enough to give them the big room."
"Aah, but you already know why I couldn't! I was busy with all the prince stuff!"
"Y/N was too, though? And theyâre doing twice the work than you."
"But Y/N's more organized than me!"
"So you agree? My cousin earned the bigger room?"
"No, itâs not thâaish! Bang Chan!" When the older boy in question tries pushing Jisung back to the smaller bedroom, the latter childishly protests by gripping onto the doorframe. "I'm making it up to you now! I'm literally staying here for 6 months!"
"Yeah and I'll definitely treat you to lots of other things for that later. Seriously, Ji, give it a rest. It's just your temporary room for the exam." Chan sighs with a tired laugh, prying the younger wizard's hands off of the doorframe and shoving him inside the room. "Unpack your things and get some sleep. We're having a welcoming party for you two on the weekend."
"You're supposed to side with me here."
"Don't pull that face, you're not kids anymore." Chan chuckles, ruffling the younger boy's hair. "And I'm not siding with anyone. Itâs just a room! Night, Sungie."
Jisung opens his mouth to protest, only for Chan to close the door on him and walk back to his own room. With a sigh, the boy defeatedly trudges to his new bed and, after taking out his expandable pouch from his pockets, jumps to the mattress with a muffled groan to the plush pillows.
Jisung also hates how one of his best friends favors you better just because you're cousins first. He's had enough of Chan coddling you before from when you were kids, always taking your side when the two of you bicker and offering you his extra food when the three of you are together, and he would much prefer it if he doesn't see it now that the two of you are undergoing an important exam.
"At least the view's nice." He pouts to himself once he's seated up once more, facing the window that overlooks the city. After just spending ten minutes flying over Seoul and exploring Chan's vast mansion, Jisung gets it a little now. Chan definitely didn't choose this realm over their home for no reason.
If I'm not in line to be king, Jisung thinks to himself, this life also seems nice.
Hovering his hands over the enchanted green pouch, its neatly packed contents of clothes and other personal belongings then emerge from its seemingly tiny space before levitating to their respective places. "Aish, that Y/N!" Jisung yells loudly on purpose, leaning on his side closer to the door to hear your reaction.
Across the hall, while you make a fuss out of unpacking and changing the appearance of some furniture, you yell back, "Shut up, Ji!"
Jisung has many reasons for disliking you at times but, if anything, he lives for your reactions when he purposely annoys you. Even when he knows youâre always a spell away from actually snapping at him, you never actually do and it never fails to amuse him. Scoffing, he lets it slide for now and quietly unpacks.
-
If attending social functions as a royal has taught you anything over the years, it's to avoid being within reach of Jisung at a party before, during, and after he makes a huge mess of things. You've had your own fair share of spilled drinks to your dress robes, purposely getting embarrassed in front of the elders and other important public officials, and even a huge fight over not wanting to be his dance partner to remind you of this at all times.
Of the places that you and Jisung have to be standing next to each other, it's the parties that you hate having to see him at the most because they bring you nothing but trouble. Chan's welcoming party for the two of you, with witches and wizards living in the human world as well as Chan's own human friends in attendance, is no exception.
"What do you think he's going to do this time?" Yeji snickers next to you on the makeshift dance floor of the house's backyard. Ever since her brother disappeared, she's been staying in the human world combing through every inch of Seoul and trying to retrace what is little known of the steps he took. Naturally, you've stuck to each other like glue since she arrived. "It's been two hours since this party started and all he's doing isâ"
"Flirt with every human on the dance floor. I know, that's why I'm not looking over my shoulder. I think that's all he's planning to do in this party, given that we've started with the test." You frown, taking a sip of your beer as the song changes to a more lively one. "This guy's never taken any exam back in school seriously but now he suddenly wants to win this one exam. Weird, right?"
"Hm, maybe he really wants to win this exam and become high king. You can never really tell what goes on in that head of his." Yeji shrugs, blinking twice in quick succession to make her eyes turn red, an indication that she's scanning the venue for the humans' ecures. "Anyway, he's definitely working hard. I see a lot of orange hearts for him as much as there are for you."
Only then do you also turn your head around the place, your own eyes turning blue as you collect the orange hearts of infatuation and green hearts of friendship that people you've met tonight have for you with a non-verbal spell. As you catch these little crystal hearts into your locket, you briefly catch a glimpse of Jisung at one of the foldable tables chatting with three human girls. It somehow irritates you.
"He never lost that cringey fuckboy persona, huh?" Yeji points out once you're done with your collecting, shaking her now empty bottle and frowning once she realizes that it's already empty. "I guess I didn't miss out on much even after being away for a few weeks."
"You talk like you were gone for a year, not 3 weeks." You laugh. When she then asks you if you want to get new beer bottles, you follow her back to the coolers behind Chan's DJ set. "I hate how we'll be seeing more of those again when we start attending uni to collect more hearts."
"Oh, right! You're attending mine, right? You'll be with me, Seungmin, and Ryujin?" When you nod once more, she links her arms with yours and adds, âGosh, I can just see it now, girls from the different departments flocking the two of you on the first day but especially Sung. A lot of girls I know from uni really dig that e-boy thing he has going on."
You pretend to gag, making her throw her head back in a cackle of laughs. "Humans and their weird tastes in men." You scrunch up your nose, the two of you briefly pausing to politely wave at Chan as you pass by his booth.
Your cousin doesn't hesitate to wave back at you both before going back to his spinning. You and Yeji then head to the back of his area where the coolers of different beverages have been placed.
"Oh shush, didn't you too also have a crush on him way back then?" Yeji teases the moment the two of you are alone again, opening the cooler with a simple flick of her hand. You follow along despite the glare you send her way, your empty beer bottles getting replaced by new ones. "Sometimes, Ryujin and I like to think that you still have a little bit of that."
"No way." You shake your head in denial, picking up a bottle opener from one of the closed coolers and using it over yours and Yeji's. "Middle school was a long time ago. Jisung just irritates the hell out of me now."
"Who irritates who now?" A voice behind you perks up almost immediately, causing you to jump and spill a little of your beer on the grass. When you glance over your shoulder, Jisung's white bucket hat comes into your vision, eventually uncovering his mischievous smile. "Ah, so clumsy. Look, you spilled a little beer on the grass.âÂ
Next to you, Yeji giggles behind her hand while greeting Jisung. You glare at her in response.
"You're annoying." You point out with a pout, thrusting the bottle opener to his chest before linking arms with Yeji. "We're going."
Jisung only shrugs with a smirk, waving goodbye to Yeji as the two of you pass by him to go back to the dance floor. "It makes you look, doesn't it?"
"Uh-huh, keep telling yourself that." You roll your eyes before disappearing back into the crowd with Yeji.
Once Jisung is out of earshot, Yeji then nudges your side with your linked arms. "I'm telling you, there's still a little something. Deep, deep down there." She teases in a singsong. âThatâs probably why the banter just wonât die out.â
"Nope, definitely not." You shake your head. "Have you been watching too much of those human dramas while youâre here? Itâs playing with your judgement."
-
It comes even as a surprise to Jisung himself that he hasn't caused a major mishap in this welcoming party so far. Since the majority of the guests started arriving two hours ago, he hasn't done anything troubling besides losing to Ryujin at beer pong and finishing a whole red cup of Chan's jungle juice concoction as punishment almost an hour ago.
It doesn't bother his "instincts for mischief" that muchâhis mentor's words not his. It means that he's more focused on collecting ecures at the moment with the amount of humans he's mingled with at this party, especially the girls who have taken it upon themselves to flirt with him.
What does bother him slightly, however, is the way you occasionally glance over to him knowingly from across the lawn, as if you're expecting him to do something. You always seem to do that after years of getting roped into his troubles, much like a lot of your childhood friends who'd frequently end up in similar predicaments. Somehow, however, it's always intimidating when it's you looking at him. He personally hates that, the look in your eyes when you're trying to catch him in his mischievous acts.
"Who are you and what have you done to my twin brother?" Felix has been teasing the entire night every time he encounters Jisung. When Jisung pouts this time, while the two share a drink on a couch that was brought out for this party, Felix laughs over his drink and adds, "Oh, so you're really focused on this test, huh? No trouble until this party's over?"
"Why do you guys think I'm not?" Jisung frowns, elbowing his brother by his side. "Geez, Lix, you're supposed to root for me here. If I win, you get to be king too."
In response, Felix waves his solo cup dismissively. "No, no, I think you're doing great! You've caught how much already? Twenty hearts in this party? That's a great start, bro." He comments with a proud smile. "It's just a little new, seeing you all so serious and focused. It's not because you're up against Y/N, right?"
"Ha? Nope, definitely not. It's barely a competition when I'm clearly winning." Jisung shakes his head a little too defensively as he sinks into the soft velvet couch. "I just think it's natural that another kingdom should get the high crown this time and since it's only me and Y/N competing, unless we also find Hyunjin while we're here I should work hard and make it happen."
Just then, Seungmin sits down on his other side with a cup of punch and a small paper plate of sweets from the chocolate fountain. "If Hyunjin was here, he would've whipped your asses in this party by getting all of the human guys and girls with one smile." He points out matter-of-factly. "Plus, if Lia accepted the candidacy, all three of you would've lost even before you left home."
"You never really rooted for me, huh, Minnie?" Jisung feigns sad eyes as he rests his head on Seungmin's shoulder. "And here I thought we're best friends."
"Oh no, I'm totally rooting for you now." Seungmin replies with a dry chuckle, passing his paper plate over to Felix when he holds his hands out in a motion asking for food. "But if the gang was complete, I would've changed to team Hyunjin."
Jisung scoffs at this, swiping a marshmallow covered in chocolate from Seungmin's plate. "Fine, I wonât hold it against you. I miss Hyunjin too."
"Yeji and Chae are doing everything they can to look for him. He'll turn up somewhere, he just has to. Until then, you should just focus more on your exam. Hyunnie would want that." Felix quips in before turning his attention over to you and Yeji at the nearby karaoke mini bar. "Look, that's what Y/N and Yeji are doing right now."
When Jisung looks through the crowd that has gathered around you, his eyes turning a deep green, he sees a lot of orange hearts gravitate over to you, mostly from the uni boys and girls that Yeji, Seungmin, and Ryujin have invited to this party.
"You guys are seeing it too, right?" Felix asks, his own eyes a matching shade of green when he tilts his head over to Seungmin and Jisung. "At least twenty new hearts in a span of 10 minutes, right after they just gave Y/N a bunch of green hearts."
Seungmin nods, his head movements making Jisung's head shake a little on his shoulder. "Yeah. Y/N's really working extra on this." He notes in complete awe. "The competition's really close, don't you think so Lix?"
"Definitely. What do you think, Ji?"
"Nope, definitely not." Jisung crosses his arms and shakes his head in disagreement. "It's impressive but not enough to catch up to me."
But the smallest hint of a frown gracing his features is enough to give his feelings away to his friends. Only now does it fully sink in that itâs definitely a tight competition between the two of you.
one out of six months
At one point, you understood why people would foolishly fall for Jisung. On a really good day, when he's not causing you or anyone too much trouble, you could see his playful side as charming, maybe even too cute for you to admit it out loud. A long time ago, back when you were still so naĂŻve, you had a small playground crush on him too, after all; a crush that ended so badly you're convinced it's where your bickering naturally escalated.
But now, as your days in the human world turn into a month spent fulfilling your Crown Candidacy exam at university with your friends, you just wish that not a lot of humans are so insanely attracted to Jisung. It's nothing personal, of course, you're not jealous at all in that way. Whenever you sit in the library to study, attend classes from late in the morning to early afternoons, or even just sit in the quad with your shared friend group discussing updates on Yeji's search for Hyunjin, however, your competitor is just always being followed by flocks of smitten girls with their orange and pink ecures of crushes on their sleeves, ready to be collected by Jisung's emerald ring.
And you're not going to get started on the rainbow-colored hearts that send him little gifts and love letters at least once a week before classes, sometimes even directly to Chan's house where the third kitchen fridge is now filled with bakery goods stashed along with Chan's fan gifts. Not wanting to admit it to him or any of your friends, you're admittedly quite jealous because he attracts the ecures from the humans so easily while you have to work extra harder in socializing with your human peers to garner even just pink hearts. You hate having to work extra, extra harder just to be on par with him all the time, especially when he seems to be effortless in his ways.
"Before Lix went back to the magical realm, he relayed that Changbin from back home suggested that we start expanding our search for Hyunjin toâ" For the sixth time since your group met up at the quad after classes this particular afternoon, another group of girls pass by and greet Jisung, interrupting Yeji in her explanations. Pouting slightly, she then turns to Jisung and pokes him with her pen, snapping the smirk off of his face. "Sung, focus."
Jisung nods quickly, waving Yeji's pen away from his side. "Yeah, let me just collect their hearts real quick."
You roll your eyes in response, nudging Yeji to resume her updates. "Just go on, Yeji." You encourage her, Seungmin and Ryujin nodding along in agreement. For emphasis, you make sure to tap Jisung's hand on the grass with your own pen harshly, making him wince dramatically in pain. "You're extending the search to Incheon, right?"
"Oh, uh yeah. Like I said, Lix said that Changbin suggested Incheon since Hyunjin briefly mentioned it in one of his letters. We'll start looking into it ourselves before this semester is over." Yeji continues on, ignoring the next group of passing girls that Jisung gets distracted over again this time around. "Chaeryoung is going there in the following months, though, to scout the places first. Then, we'll try and follow up with a search of our own. I'll have to ask Chan and the jury back at home if you and Jisung are allowed to go, though, since you're taking your exam."
"Among those places, Hyunjin often went to this stretch of the beach because he was investigating a monster from home who escaped here and took an artifact from our kingdom." Seungmin added, pointing to a location on Yeji's map sprawled over your laptops at the very center of your circle. "It was one of his last assignments here before he suddenly disappeared. We'll probably stay here the longest."
You try your best to listen, adding your own inputs to how your search operations would go while also noticing a couple of people who recognize you and wave your way, but Jisung somehow keeps grabbing your attention by the way he entertains his admirers who greet him shyly as they pass by you group. The playful smirks he sends their way, the polite waves, and the way his hand keeps twitching in between the two of you as he collects the ecures with his own spell keep eating away at your attention span, pressuring you that he's taking the lead in your race.
You also try discreetly collecting your own share of hearts under your breath whenever someone you know passes by but you eventually find it hard finding people while trying to listen to your friends. "Ji, focus." You mumble under your breath after a while, breaking his focus as he collects two more orange hearts.
"Y/N, keep up with me here." He smirks, just as the orange hearts disappear into his ring. "Why are you so distracted by me, anyway? Jealous?"
"Iâm not jealous!âÂ
"Guys focus." Ryujin snaps at the two of you this time, chuckling in amusement when you and Jisung both glare at her. "Hey, easy on the stink eyes. I'm just telling you two to listen over here."
"Do as I do, Ryujin, and just tune them out." Seungmin jabs nonchalantly as he and Yeji take down notes of their discussion, not even once looking up at you nor Jisung. "It works out splendidly once you've mastered it."
"Hearing them bicker over random things before was one thing. Hearing them bicker over ecures now is a whole new playing field." Ryujin smirks, particularly to you. "Ah, you guys sound even more like a married couple now that you're competing. Tsk, tsk..."
"No, we're not!" You and Jisung answer in chorus, looking incredulously at each other after. "Ya!"
"Seungmin's right. Just tune them out, Ryujin." Yeji points out without missing a beat, a small smile taking out the initial annoyance from her face. "Anyway, what's important is we settle our plans first. Let the married couple race for the crown."
"Ya! Hwang Yeji!" You scold, flinging your notebook towards her which she dodges swiftly. "I'm listening, I swear."
Yeji gives you a look of mock disbelief in response before chuckling and going back to her work. "Whatever you say."
-
Jisung wonât admit it to any of you nor his friendsâ faces but he may be just a little jealous that youâre catching onto him at a great speed and looking surprisingly nonchalant about it on the outside. You work extremely hard, thatâs a given and Jisung respects that as much as the two of you annoy each other. But he doesnât even have to sneak over to your room at night and check your locket for your ecure count; the boys and girls from uni, the market where Chan forces the two of you to run errands on weekends, and even at Ryujinâs favorite skate park who always take two glances your way wherever you go are enough giveaway to the amount youâre collecting everyday. And itâs a whole lot of hearts. He wonât even be surprised if youâve managed to collect 300 hearts by now.
And heâs not even going to get started on how fast you manage to take ecures from the same people twice in less than a week, managing to charm same-age neighbors and classmates from good friends to secret admirers in a span of a few days and getting you at least twice the amount for your tally. You have enough hearts on your locket to keep up with Jisungâs count and use your magic leisurely at home. You definitely keep your competitor up on his toes all the time with how youâre giving your all in this competition and itâs gnawing at him to do even better.Â
What annoys him on top of this, however, are certain kinds of people that look your way, or even Yejiâs and Ryujinâs for that matter. When the three of you arenât looking and a bunch of passing jocks would eye you weirdly on the quad or at the library, especially since youâre new to the school, his natural instinct is to glare them down until theyâre looking away. He sees their purple ecures from where he would sit across from you as you study, a sign of a lusting kind of feeling, and it does nothing but to tick him off into intimidating them until the color fades out.Â
Seungmin thinks that, in a way, this is cheating and that youâd probably think the same way if you find out since purple ecures are ranked quite high in the tally, just above pink hearts (âY/Nâs gotten mad at you before for going too far or breaking the rules. You, of all people, should know not to get on their bad side.â). When Jisung writes to Felix back home after, however, his twin naturally defends him and says that heâs just looking out for you.Â
âYou guys donât always see eye to eye, even now that youâre competing against each other,â Felix recorded over the enchanted mail that arrived after your meeting at the quad, Jisung and Seungmin separating from your group to do some more studying at the library. âbut youâre just looking out for Y/N and protecting them from any weirdos, like for Ryujin and Yeji. Just tone it down a bit and let them handle it sometimes.âÂ
âSee? Lix thinks Iâm doing something right.â Jisung sticks his tongue out at Seungmin who simply shakes his head in stubborn disagreement before returning back to his class notes. âIâm telling you, Iâm not sabotaging Y/N on purpose.âÂ
âStill, whether they want to collect those purple ecures or not is not your choice to make.â Seungmin points out. Though he agrees with Jisungâs intentions, as heâs been doing the same and looking out for you and your friends in his own ways as well, he also trusts that you can take care of yourself. âJust let them handle it next time, unless they actually do need your help.â
âButââ
âConsider the guys that passed by at the quad the last time youâll mess with Y/Nâs ecures.â âYou saw that?!â
Still, it gnaws on Jisungâs conscience when he takes the train home with you later that day, when another purple heart springs up for you as he checks your surroundings and finds it to be from a stranger. What a creep, Jisung cringes internally with disgust before strategically blocking the man out from your sight and standing closer to you, Y/Nâs competition but Iâm a decent being! Be the bigger person or whatever bullshit.
âYa, what are you doing?â You push him away with your index finger to his stomach, leaving a bigger gap between the two of you as you stand on the moving train. âJi, personal space.âÂ
âWeâre literally cramped in this train like canned sardines, Y/N. Iâm just trying to make space for the people coming in.â Jisung fibs in retort, unknowingly timing his words perfectly with the train making a stop and justifying his next action of taking a step closer to you. This time, he makes sure that heâs towering over you and blocking the creep behind him completely by moving his hand over to the train handle right next to where your hand is. âDonât make it weird!â
Your expression is surprisingly unwavering now, clearly unamused by his boyish quips. âYouâre the one making it weird! You keep hovering over me.âÂ
âSure, sure, whatever you say.â He rolls his eyes, instinctively steadying you with one hand when the abrupt movements of the train pushes you slightly forwards. âOops, careful there.âÂ
When Jisung takes one last glance at the creep and finds him still looking over your general direction, the boy finally snaps and sends a little spell over the manâs way, one that makes him itch all over and ties his shoelaces together. This is the last time, Jisung swears to himself with a chuckle under his breath, oh what the hell? Punishing creeps is kinda funny.
two out of six months
The first time Han Jisung spots a red heart that he can collect, itâs 2 months into your candidacy exam and he makes the surprising decision to prolong collecting it by several days. Itâs not that Soonyoung from your Math class is aware of this. As far as she knows, Jisung is simply stringing her along much like he does with every other girl heâs flirting with and she doesnât seem to mind this fact.Â
But you mind, you and your other friends do a lot. âItâs a powerful heart and costs 5000 points on the point system.â Seungmin even noted himself once on another day that Jisung left your class without Soonyoungâs crystal red heart. You mostly agree on this, coupled with the fact that you canât steal the heart for yourself to gain more points in the race since itâs not for you. âJust take it, itâs not going to get any higher than that.â
No matter how much you or any of your friends nag, however, Jisung simply lets the days pass doing nothing much about it besides entertain Soonyoung whenever the girl approaches. As his sole competitor in your candidacy exam, you visibly feel the most frustrated out of everyone else by each passing day, especially at the thought that you yourself havenât managed any red hearts yet.Â
âIt is weird, very not like him but also a bit like him if that makes sense?â Ryujin notes by the 10th day, after you recounted Math class to her as you take a short break together. Today, Jisung agreed to go to lunch with Soonyoung, only to tell you and Seungmin that even then heâs not going to take her heart today. âI mean knowing what happened between you two in middle schââÂ
You immediately shake your head before she could even finish her thought, âNo, I donât think that has anything to do with now. Definitely not.âÂ
âItâs not like that! I meant to say that this is even worse than when you had a crush on Jisung. The girlâs ecure is as red as red could go!â Ryujin exclaims, forcing you to cover her mouth with your hand just as Soonyoung and Jisung comically pass by your table at the kiosk to eat lunch together. Slowly prying your hands off once the pair in question are out of earshot, Ryujin then leans over the table and continues, âBut even then, heâs not taking it to gain momentum in your exam. Arenât you a little bit curious why?âÂ
You hesitantly shrug, âI mean, a little...but honestly I think heâs just being stupid. If I were him, I wonât string the girl along, not for this long anyway. Itâs a waste of time and effort when he can just pick up the heart and reject her carefully.âÂ
âThen, maybe he has his reasons. If you know about it, you might get an advantage!â Yeji speaks up this time, joining your table late with a huge pile of library books on top of her laptop bag in her hands. As much as this girl has been busy looking for her brother, she also keeps up with her human world cover surprisingly well even when she doesnât have to with all the studying that she does on the side. âOne way to find out, right? I heard Felixâs not that busy these days back home.â
You feign a frown at the two girls agreeing in unison, especially at Yeji as she takes out her phone from the magical realm. âYou know, youâre really good at sticking your head into a lot of things even when youâre busy looking for your brother.â You note dryly, making Yeji laugh while dialling Felixâs phone on the other side. âThat was sarcastic, Yeji.âÂ
âIâm a great multitasker.â She winks before placing her phone at the center of your table then scooting her chair closer to you and Ryujin, effectively hiding the odd-looking device that projects Felixâs face almost immediately. âHey Lix!â
âHi Lix!â You politely greet along with Ryujin anyway, waving to the small projection of the prince on Yejiâs phone. By the faint greenery that surrounds him, you immediately assume that heâs back at home and tending to his personal garden.Â
âIâm not in trouble, am I?â The younger Eastern prince jokes, greeting the three of you individually after. âWhatâs up? Seungmo and Sungie not with you three today?âÂ
âSeungmin got held back in class today for a TA offering and your brotherâs on a date! Can you believe it? A lunch date with a human girl!â Yeji explains a little too excitedly, you and Ryujin immediately shushing her up. Giggling, the princess continues anyway, âWhich is why we called! We just thought itâs a little weird that Jisungâs not trying to catch this red heart when itâs a clear advantage to his tally and maybe youâd know why.âÂ
All the while Yeji explains your purpose for calling, you slowly observe how Felixâs own expression morphs into that of genuine surprise. âWhat? He hasnât taken it?!â He exclaims in response after Yeji finishes speaking. âAre you sure? Thatâs not very like him.âÂ
âWell, why do you think he hasnât taken it, then?â You suddenly find yourself asking this time, earning you incredulous looks from your peers. Brushing them off, you simply glance over at Felix as he tries thinking of a reason himself.Â
âMaybe he still canât reject admirers for shit.â Ryujin snickers under her breath, making you elbow the girl harshly on her side.Â
But surprisingly, Felix nods absentmindedly to this. âMaybeâŠâ
âAre you seriously agreeing with that, Lix?â You frown. âI think heâs just up to no good.âÂ
âHey, Ji can act weird and not be up to trouble too, you know.â Felix pouts back. âBut honestly, I donât know why heâs not thinking of taking it either, especially knowing how heâs so proud of getting to receive it alone. Maybe he likes this person, who knows?âÂ
The thought feels so foreign to you, Jisung genuinely liking someone, especially knowing what he did when you were much younger. But when you glance over to your friends, you also notice the same confused looks on their faces.Â
âHan Jisung...liking someone? Enough to respect their feelings?â Ryujin muses out loud before eventually shaking her head. âNope, sounds weird. Dangerous! Alien! Y/N, have you been noticing any other weird things from your housemate lately? Maybe heâs been secretly abducted by aliens!âÂ
âOh stop it, Ryujin! Whatever it is my brotherâs planning, I trust that he at least has an idea what heâs doing.â Felix sighs, running a hand through his blonde locks. In the background of his end, the faint voice of Changbin beckoning him over momentarily catches his attention. âIf heâs being stupid again, then just let him be. If he does like this person, though, I just hope that he treads carefully while heâs at it. You know how precious witch ecures are.âÂ
âOh, I knowâŠâ You murmur under your breath as you scrunch up your nose, unconsciously glancing over to Jisung and Soonyoungâs table where the two are laughing over something you canât hear from across the room. When Changbinâs voice grows louder on Felixâs end, you then smoothly steer the topic to a close, âAnyway, sorry for bothering you at this time. Binâs calling for you.âÂ
Next to you, Ryujin and Yeji agree with nods and smiles as Felix waves his free hand dismissively at this. âNo, itâs okay! Just look out for my brother, yeah? I gotta go, Queen Lia just arrived for tea with me and my mom!âÂ
âOh, then weâll see you!â âHave fun at tea!â âSay hi to Lia for us!âÂ
Felix waves one last goodbye before ending the call. As his image disappears from Yejiâs phone, the princess is quick to pocket her phone back and turn to you with a raised brow, âSo, what do you think? Even Lix finds it weird.âÂ
Personally, you think itâs odd. The thought that Jisung could easily be developing feelings for someone while taking your exam, to someone human no less. Youâll probably never admit it to him but heâs been working hard in collecting hearts up to this point and you know him enough to know that he wonât let himself get distracted with something like this. âWhat is he planning exactly?âÂ
-
Youâre giving Jisung that look again, through the boyâs reflection on the bus mirror no less as the two of you head to Chanâs studio where he has promised the two of you dinner. The same look you kept giving him during your welcome party just last month, probably without you knowing, rests on your tired features as you listen to music on your phone and rest your cheek against your propped up hand on the window seat you almost threw him out of the bus for. What did I do now? The boy canât help but whine pitifully to himself as he steals another glance at your direction while scrolling through his phone.Â
Jisung helplessly rakes his brain for anything that heâs done today that couldâve possibly pissed you off while pretending to look down on his phone, missing the way you shift uncomfortably in your seat as if you were going to ask a question.Â
âSoââ âI meant to askââ
Jisungâs immediately closes his mouth shut when the two of you speak at the same time, eyes widening when he looks up and sees you already looking over at him directly. Simultaneously, youâre quick to look away from him and cough awkwardly, quietly mumbling out that Jisung speaks first. âGo ahead.âÂ
âWhat did I do this time?â Jisung immediately goes for it, pouting and sinking into his seat for extra emphasis. This visibly surprises you by the way your eyes widen slightly and you visibly freeze in front of him. âYouâve been glaring at me from the window since it started getting dark outside and itâs starting to get annoying but Iâm too tired from today to think of everything that I did today to pinpoint where I ticked you off again.âÂ
Your lips curl down to a frown and you bring your propped up arm back to your side, sinking down your own seat to his level. âI wasnât glaring at you!âÂ
âYes you wereââ ââNo, I wasnât!â âYes youââ
âOkay, then, if I was glaring at you like you said, itâs because I meant to ask you something.â You huff before shyly looking away, gazing out of the window again. âW-Why havenât you...whyhaventyoutakenthatgirlsheart?â
Now, Jisung is even more confused than ever from not understanding a word you just said. Raising a curious brow, the prince nudges you by your shoulder with his own until you look back at him again, uttering a slow, âWhat?!âÂ
You inhale slowly, as if holding your embarrassment in, before repeating, âWhy havenât you taken Soonyoungâs heart?âÂ
âIâreally? Thatâs what you wanted to ask?â Thatâs it? So I didnât do shit? Whew...
You nod, crossing your arms and looking away. âWell, donât act so smug now! Iâm just curious, itâs powerful and worth a lot of points, after all.â
Caught off-guard, it takes Jisung a worryingly long time to answer your question. He looks down on his phone first, with his emerald ring right next to it, before glancing over to the distant LED screen at the very front of the bus, announcing the next stop. âJust becauseâŠâ He trails off with a reluctant shrug, avoiding the feeling of your curious gaze. If it were any other situation, maybe involving a lower-ranking heart like a yellow, green, or even an orange one, he would be laughing at you and teasing that youâre obsessed with his count or trying to compare it with your own. âYou, of all people should knowâŠâÂ
But itâs a red heart, one thatâs made him a bit too flustered for him to admit to anyone, even to his own brother. âI donât know what Iâll do with it.â He answers vaguely because of this, hearing a little âohâ from your side. âI already told Soonyoung over lunch that I donât see her like that but itâs still red. Her feelings are too sincere for me and I feel like I canât take advantage of that, not for a competition.âÂ
Jisung doesnât hear any verbal response from your side after this, not even when the LED screen ahead announces that youâre nearing your stop. When he glances over to you through the window, however, he catches a glimpse of the smallest hint of a content smile on your features.Â
Only when the two of you arrive at your stop, while youâre following him down the stairs down from the bus, do you nudge him on his side once more and say, âI guess thatâs sweet of you. Plus, youâre actually using your head for once.âÂ
Your soft smile momentarily catches him off-guard, freezing him on the sidewalk, until a passerby brushes him by his shoulder and snaps him back to reality. âY-Ya! Whatâs that supposed to mean?!âÂ
You wave your hand dismissively at him with a laugh, running off ahead to Chanâs studio. âLast one to the studio is a lousy runner and wonât get dessert!âÂ
âHey! Y/N! Whatâs that supposed to mean? Did you just call me stupid?!âÂ
-
The next day, a âsecret admirerâ leaves a red apple, a milk box, and an unsigned heart-shaped note on your usual table as you enter Math class. Though the note has your name and its message typed and printed, a simple nonverbal spell that you cast over the gifts reveal a familiar fingerprint.Â
âSo, whoâs it from?â Jisung asks, swiftly swiping the apple from your table and taking a huge bite. âHow many points are we looking at here?âÂ
You scoff at his action, taking the apple for yourself and biting on the opposite side. âItâs from Soonyoung.â You answer with a mischievous smile, causing your competitor to choke. When you glance over at the girlâs table, your eyes briefly turn blue to see a pinkish heart for you. âI guess you donât want her red heart, huh? Mind if I make a pink one from her into a red for me?âÂ
Jisung coughs violently, thumping his fist against his chest as he recovers. âY-Ya! Donât you dare!âÂ
three out of six monthsÂ
One thing youâve been most looking forward to in this Crown Candidacy exam, besides seeing your cousin and friends currently staying in the human world and helping with Hyunjinâs search, is getting to see your cousinâs boyfriend again. Though the rest of your family doesnât really approve of Minho, mostly since heâs the reason why Chan renounced his duke title in the first place and why your cousin might be permanently tied to the human world in the future, youâve taken a liking to the guy since you first met him on a short visit 2 years ago and have been looking forward to hanging out in person once more after a long while.Â
Minho makes Chan the happiest youâve ever seen him since you were kids, cooks really well, travels the world as a performing artist, and is totally cool with the idea that his boyfriend is a wizard from another realm. Plus, he catches onto magical items really quick, having adapted quickly to using your realmâs inter-world mailing system hence how youâve been keeping in touch up until this point. You honestly donât see any reason to hate him, even before meeting him in person. If anything, knowing that itâs Minho thatâs keeping Chan from fulfilling his royal duties makes you support your cousinâs decision even more than before.Â
However, youâre already halfway done with your exam and Minho is still nowhere to be seen. He initially promised you that heâll cook you and Jisung a meal as soon as you arrived but last-minute plans in his touring schedule with a ballet company held him back abroad, postponing this plan indefinitely and making you focus more on school and helping look for Hyunjin.Â
That is until you and Jisung came home from your usual Saturday grocery errands to inhale the smell of meat and mushroom soup coming from the kitchen.Â
âIs Chan cooking?â Jisung raised a brow at this, closing the door behind you and walking further inside the house. âIt smells nice, though. So itâs not him?âÂ
You roll your eyes, biting down a laugh at this surprisingly funny quip. âThatâs definitely not Chan.â You affirm anyways, excitedly walking past him to the kitchen where you find the familiar back of a person stirring a big pot of soup next to Chan whoâs chopping up side dishes. âMinho!âÂ
Jisung follows you to the kitchen and watches from the doorframe as this said Minho turns around, opening his arms out to hug you as you quickly drop your groceries on the dining table and run towards him. Next to you two, Chan stops his own work and laughs at the sight, prying you away after a moment and reminding you, âHey, hey, Minhoâs tired from his flight!â
âTired? Then you make him cook dinner? I donât think so!â You giggle, clutching onto Minho like a koala while the said boy pretends to shrug you off. âI was wondering when youâre coming home! You havenât even written since I came here, you jerk!âÂ
âMy schedule was jam-packed until the other day but I promised some magic freaks that Iâll cook them dinner so I came home as soon as I can.â Minho laughs, hugging you back and only then catching sight of a confused Jisung. âOh, hi there! You must be Han Jisung?âÂ
âY-Yeah?â Jisung nods slowly in confusion, raising one hand holding multiple eco-bags up in a wave. He hates it when heâs not in the loop of things but more importantly, he hates it when itâs you keeping him out of the loop in particular. Whoâs this guy?! âSorry, and you are?âÂ
âLee Minho! Iâm keeping Chan hostage here on Earth.â Minho formally introduces himself, earning him a nudge from both you and Chan. âWhat? Should I curtsy? I know your family and Hyunjinâs doesnât really require it but I donât know about the others soââÂ
Oh. At this, Jisung visibly relaxes with a chuckle and finally approaches your little group, settling his own share of the groceries down on the dining table before sitting down himself. Chan then takes this as his cue to reluctantly drag you over next to Jisung while he and Minho finish cooking. âNo, no, itâs cool! Weâre not at home, anyway.âÂ
âOkay, then, cool. You guys are okay with waiting for a little bit, right? The lambâs not fully cooked yet.â Minho explains. âI was going to make you two a meal when your exam started but I got caught up in work soââ
âYeah itâs fine!â You agree eagerly, taking out your groceries and organizing them on the table. âWeâll just fix up the groceries.âÂ
Jisung side-eyes you with an incredulous look in his eyes, something Chan definitely notices as his lips quirk up into a knowing grin before whispering something to Minho. âWhy are you so chirpy all of a sudden?â He asks you, helping you take out the groceries and arrange them into their respective shelves.Â
âWhat do you mean? Iâve been chirpy since this morning.â You scoff. âWhy do you even keep track? I told you not to stare at me, weirdo.â
âUm no, you werenât. You were complaining about me breathing next to you on the bus a while ago. âYouâre not helping me get any heartsâ or whatever it was you were rambling about a while back.â Jisung points out with a huff. âAnd I donât stare, thatâs you! If anything, youâre the weirdo, always up my business!â
âWell, why wouldnât I complain? I was at the market with you all day! You donât know how to pick good vegetables and you kept flirting with the store clerks to try and up their orange hearts to pink ones! Then, you wore that stupid perfume again when I told you already that it smells bad! Now weâre at home and you can stay the fuck away from me.âÂ
âYa, you little shââÂ
Across the kitchen, Minho giggles in amusement at hearing you and Jisung bicker live for the first time. Youâve always complained about this Jisung fellow in your correspondence and heâs never had a clear grasp as to why youâre always at this boyâs neck but now that heâs meet Jisung in the flesh and is starting to hear what you two are exactly fighting about, Minho canât help but laugh into the mushroom soup. âSo this is the troublemaker whoâs been bugging our Y/N.â He ends up musing out loud. âI see why you need me home now.â
âBelieve me, you shouldâve seen them grow up together with the other kids. Always fighting over the smallest of things, competing on whoâs better, and all that.â Chan rolls his eyes in disinterest, glancing over to you and Jisung as the latter starts chasing you around the dining area with a bundle of scallions. âWhat youâre seeing right now is barely the tip of the iceberg, Min.â
âReminds you a little bit of us back then, donât you think?âÂ
âYa, and which one am I supposed to be?âÂ
The couple glances over their shoulders to see that youâve now successfully snatched the scallions from Jisung with your magic and have started to hit him over the head with it. This then makes Chan squint his eyes suspiciously at Minho who only chuckles. âBabe, you and Y/N are definitely related, donât you think?âÂ
âDo you also want to get hit with scallions?âÂ
-
Though Jisung was initially wary of Minho at the start of the evening, having only heard of him vaguely from gossip among the other royal kids prior, your cousinâs boyfriend slowly and naturally transitioned over the princeâs good graces as soon as the lamb chops and mushroom soup were served along with stories of Minhoâs own adventures and questions about the magical realm. Now that heâs put a name and a face to the person that people back home simply referred to as the reason why Chan left (and who heâs admittedly been blaming as well for the sudden shift in your attitude at the royal courts), Jisung now genuinely believes that the people back at home jumped to their conclusions quickly about Minho.Â
Minhoâs really nice, Chan is really fond of him and you clearly support the two. In return, Minho looks out for you and Chan, you in particular as the older guy proceeds to drill Jisung shamelessly with questions on whatever it is that youâve mentioned about him in your letters.Â
Jisung didnât even know a lot of the things Minho kept rambling on about while you tried so hard to keep his mouth shut next to him by helplessly trying to cover his mouth.
âY/N talks about you a whoooooooole lot. Like, a minor inconvenience during their royal duties then theyâre quick to talk to me about it.â Minho grins playfully, dodging your attempts at shutting him up while he eats his share of the pastry dessert. âWhen we first met and this candidate exam thing was first brought up, they talked about the other royals briefly but they talked about you in super great detail! Oh, and Y/N was rambling a lot about how you reacted to when they confessed to you in middle school and everything, it was so funnââÂ
âMinho shut up!âÂ
âIt was really funny!â Minho pins your wrists to the table after a while, gesturing towards Chan, sitting next to Jisung across the table, who then uses his magic to switch your places. This then effectively shuts you up as your flustered expression overcomes your face upon accidentally locking eyes with Jisung right after. âBut I want to know what actually happened when you rejected Y/N at your magic school? I want the full scope of what happened just so I get both sides!â
âY-Ya!â You protest, only to be silenced by Jisung this time who laughs as he swallows a mouthful of food. âUgh, youâre enjoying this arenât you?â
âWhy do you still talk about that, anyway? It was a long time ago.â Jisung chuckles, propping an elbow up on the table and resting his cheek on his palm as he glances over to you with a smirk. âGod, youâre in love with me, arenât you?âÂ
âNo, Iâm noââ âSo, Minho hyung, what did Y/N tell you about that?âÂ
-
It was in the 7th grade, on Valentineâs Day of all days even, when you confessed your crush to Han Jisung. You actually didnât plan any of it to happen because you just thought of it as stupid, especially at the thought that almost everything Jisung used to do back then annoyed you and made you think of him as childish.Â
But Hyunjin somehow slipped you an enchanted cookie on that day as a prank after you confessed at Ryujinâs party the previous weekend that you thought that Jisung was cute sometimes (âI specifically said sometimes and it was one time. Clearly, it wasnât me who had a problem, right?â âThat still doesnât change the fact that 12-year-old you had a crush on me, Y/N.â). He told you that it was from a batch Felix made for their baking class, bluffing about its distinct strong vanilla scent as a mistake on the younger Eastern princeâs end.Â
As it then turned out, however, the cookie was laced with a potion that forcefully exposed the true color that your heart reflected towards Jisung in front of the entire cafeteria while the two of you bickered over some mishap that happened in one of your shared potion classes. Being young as he was as well and feeling embarrassed of all the passersby that looked at you both, Jisungâs fight or flight response made him visibly cringe at seeing the surprisingly pink, bordering red, heart and childishly berated you for it until the potion wore off and your ecure disappeared back into the sleeves of your robes. You ran away crying while Jisung didnât go to school for the few days that followed in embarrassment.
âYou were like 12 back then, it happens.â Minho shrugs after yours and Jisungâs messy storytelling. âAnd for the record, Y/N, if Chan did that to me as Jisung, I wouldâve been annoyed at him too. Your rants are totally valid.âÂ
âIâm eating my croissants in peace.â Chan complains, slapping the younger manâs arm. âDonât drag me into this.âÂ
Simultaneously, Jisung glances over to you and sees a small pout rest on your features. âWell, I donât know, itâs not really an âit happensâ kind of situation if you come from our world.â You point out, glaring at Jisung when you feel him staring at you. âEspecially back then. My heart was looking pink and a little reddish for Jisung at the timeâewâwhich gave him the power to take it if he wanted to.â
Now, this is apparently new information to Minho as he then asks, âYou can do that? I thought witches only have one heart so it canât be taken away?â
âYeah, exactly.â You nod. âSince we donât produce the crystal hearts as infinitely as you humans do, it could only be taken if itâs pink or a higher color. Itâs the natural law in our world.â
âAnd if that happens, the witch could become weak, controlled by the other witch who takes their heart, or killed.â Chan quips in this time. âThatâs why marriage is sort of a permanent commitment back at home and witches are more encouraged to use human ecure when performing higher-level magic.âÂ
âThatâs a bit of a stretch in our case, though! Itâs not like 12-year-old me would think of killing Y/N back then.â Jisung purses his lips into a thin line at you, unamused. âYou really are a bit dramatic sometimes, you know? What would I even do with your heart?â
âYou were 12, Jisung. Who knows what you were thinking back then...if you were thinking at all.â You retort immediately, turning to Minho again after. âThatâs why my familyâs a bit wary about you, Min, no offense. With you and Chan in a relationship, he can give up his heart to you but if you donât reciprocate it by exchanging with one of your own, he might get weak or die.âÂ
This then makes Jisung turn to Minho as well, curious as to what his response would be.Â
Unfazed, Minho smiles and turns lovingly to his boyfriend. âThen, arenât you lucky Iâm obsessed with you, huh?âÂ
âReally now?â Chan chuckles, slinging his arm over Minhoâs shoulder and pressing a kiss to his cheek. âThen I guess I can stay here permanently, right?âÂ
You pretend to gag as you sip on your water, reminding the older guys that there are âchildrenâ in front of them. Jisung rolls his eyes and leans back in his chair at this scene, looking away at the tender display of affection across the table. The two of you donât even have to check how the pairâs ecures reflect towards each other with your magic to know that theyâre a matching bright red.Â
When he looks over to you, he catches the briefest and fondest smile gracing your expression as you mumble about how âstupidly cuteâ Chan and Minho are being. Jisung knows he shouldnât look, not in this moment when he sees you at a vulnerable state and you would slap him over the head if he teases you about it, but his eyes unconsciously turn green and peeks over at your ecure as it watches over your favourite cousin and his boyfriend.Â
Itâs a bright blue, a sign of deep respect and familial love for Chan and Minho. Jisung looks away immediately when you glance up at him curiously, forcing his eyes back to their natural color before he could accidentally see how your heart reflects to him. âWhat?âÂ
He gets it now. Why youâve been so uptight in fulfilling your royal duties, snapping just a little more easily these days whenever he annoys you, and acting like a pushover to the elders who keep ordering you around back at home. Youâve been shouldering a lot of the responsibilities back home, both yours and the ones that Chan has left behind, all because you want your cousin to be happy in this world without worries.Â
âWhy were you looking at me?â You pout. âYou didnât check myâya, Han Jisung!â
âI wasnât looking at you like that! I was gonna ask you to pass me the cream puffs!â
You begrudgingly pass him the bowl of cream puffs, rolling your eyes before smiling at Minho and Chan again and changing the conversation to something else. âAnyway, Minho, youâre staying longer now, right?â Â
-Â
âI saw what you did at dinner, by the way. Y/N would beat you to a pulp if they knew you were looking into their heart, especially since we were just talking about it.â Chan speaks up after a moment of walking around Jisungâs room, tidying up the fallen music sheets on the ground and closing the curtains for the night. Youâve long stolen Minho from your cousin right after dinner hours ago to binge his tour videos and so heâs resorted to hanging out with Jisung, playing video games until the clock struck midnight. Â
Jisung pouts as he tucks himself away in bed, turning to his side to face Chan as the older boy continues arranging his âmessyâ work table. âI looked at how it reflects for you and Minho, not at how it looks at me. Just that, swear.â He clarifies in between protesting over Chanâs actions (âItâs an organized mess!â âItâs a mess, Jisung.â) âItâs almost like your familyâs sapphire when it looks at the two of you, bluer than how it looks when Y/Nâs with the King and the High Queen. Youâre more family to them than their own parents.â
This effectively freezes Chan in place for a moment, a small smile gracing the former dukeâs features. âOf course I know that.â He replies, almost as an inaudible mumble from across the room. âThatâs why it was so hard to leave at first.â
âThen why did youâ?âÂ
âBecause Y/N told me to.â Moving to the door and preparing to leave, Chan sees Jisungâs face and continues, âBelieve me, I was even more conflicted than youâre being right now back then. We both know that my own siblings are too young to shoulder the job Iâll leave behind but Y/N told me that theyâll gladly handle it if it meant that I can be happy here. We argued about it a lot, I kept telling them that I can just juggle moving between the two realms, but you know how persuasive and stubborn Y/N can be.âÂ
The last comment makes Jisung chuckle. Of all people, he should know of it the best. âItâs just hard to argue with them.â He nods in agreement. âI heard theyâre the one who got you this house and everything.âÂ
Chan nods, slowly putting one foot out of the door. âY/N cares a lot, sometimes a little too much, that they end up sacrificing a lot and putting their own feelings last because of it. Since I went away, Iâve only ever been worried that theyâll just explode one day, actually, but I know you and the other kids keep them in check.âÂ
âIâd hardly call Y/N relaxed with me.â Jisung pouts, fiddling with his fingers nervously as he confesses this shyly. âI think they just find me annoyingâŠâÂ
âOh you definitely annoy each other but thatâs just how you two are together. Itâs all in good fun and thatâs good, especially now that youâre going to take much more responsibilities once you go back home.â Chan notes with a shrug, briefly glancing over his shoulder as you and Minho arrive on the second floor. âJust be a little gentler with them. Night, Sung.âÂ
four out of six months
You know better than to expect nothing less from Lee Chaeryoung, one of the best investigators from your realm, as she helped Yeji lead Hyunjinâs search party. When you initially expected that she would finish scouting Incheon before the end of the semester, she came back with the most solid lead that anyoneâs picked up since the start of the search party around Seoul with 2 months left on your time in the human world.Â
Apparently, from the scouring sheâs done beyond the initial parameters of the search, a few magic and non-magic folk living around the beach area have seen the Southern kingdomâs prince at a party on the night he disappeared, interacting with a strange group of people they only described by their unusually white hairs, matching snake tattoos, and icy blue eyes. What was even more interesting is that these people were still around the area when Chaeryoung visited but without any sign of Hyunjin. With this, she could only confirm that theyâre also from the magical realm.
âThey could only be Northwestern ogre witches, Iâm sure of it.â Chan commented after hearing Chaeryoungâs report over dinner with everyone present. When Minho then asked about it, your cousin didnât hesitate to explain, âA group of witches back home who were initially banished to the wastelands because they practiced darker arts and only collected black ecures. Lately, a lot of them have been turning up here and doing gods-know-what.âÂ
âBut if they only want the artifact that Hyunjin recovered, why would they still keep him?â You ask, crossing your arms over the dining table as Chaeryoung showed you photos of the location she ascouted on her phone. âHyunjinâs high-profile too, yes, but unless they want him to collect colored ecures for them, thereâs no other reason to keep him captive when there are other magic folk there. Why him?âÂ
âUnless they have something bigger up their sleeves.â Seungmin notes with a frown, closing Chaeryoungâs phone as he grows more and more upset from across the table. When you and Jisung glance over to him curiously, he then meets your eyes and adds, âMaybe we shouldnât let you two go with us on this.âÂ
âWhat?! Why?â Jisung is the first to instinctively speak up against this, sitting up taller in his seat. You echo the same question, albeit a little quieter when you see Chan nodding worriedly on your side.Â
âI have a feeling that they might be after the two of you too from this.â Seungmin explains once Jisung calmed down a bit from his sudden outburst. âLike Y/N said, keeping Hyunjin to collect colored ecures against his will doesnât seem like a good enough reason, at least not this long.â
âItâs timed perfectly, too, that they caught Hyunjin right before the candidacy exam.â Yeji quips in, belatedly nodding in agreement to Seungminâs suggestion. âThey might be luring you two specifically by using my brother.âÂ
âBut thatâs just a hunch for now! We donât know thââÂ
Chanâs entire disposition in a flash, slamming his hand down on the table a little too loudly and effectively shutting everyone up around the table including Minho. âThatâs exactly why we canât risk it.â He counters firmly and you know, just by the tone of your cousinâs voice, that he already has the final word. âRemember, you and Y/N are here first and foremost because youâre taking your exam. Keeping you on wraps with this search is formalities, at most. Anyway, thereâs enough of us here who can look for Hyunjin. You two just stay put until we can sort this out and ensure that this problem stops interfering with the exam any further.â
When you peek over to your right to glance at Jisungâs reaction two seats away, you see him glancing back at you from the corner of his eyes before sighing in defeat. âAnd if they want our group separated?âÂ
âThe houseâs enchanted with protective spells. Minho and Ryujin will also stay and watch over you two while we extract Hyunjin over the weekend.â Chan notes, continuing before Jisung could complain further. âThatâs final, Ji. Weâll take over from here.âÂ
âDonât fret too much, Sung.â Seungmin adds comfortingly. âAnyway, if we find Hyunjin, weâll all stay here for a few days before going back home.âÂ
In response, you hear Jisung slam his back on his seat hard before huffing childishly, glancing over to you as he opens his mouth. Knowing that heâll throw a fit, you immediately shake your head, forbidding him from doing so. âFine...â He murmurs under his breath with a sigh, knowing better than to start an argument with one of his best friends at this time. âJustâjust bring Hyunjin back quickly.âÂ
Somehow, even when you understand where Chanâs coming from, you also feel somewhat bad for Jisung. You want to see Hyunjin too but your circumstances arenât exactly favourable to let you be of much help.Â
-Â
As much as Jisung used to hate how Chan coddled you, he hates it even more now that the same behavior is directed towards him, especially in situations like this when he wants to actively help in Hyunjinâs search. The circumstances couldnât have been more unfavorable to him now: the group finding a lead but at a time when heâs participating in an exam that has him more at risk of being targeted by creatures from the magical realm that have strayed to this world.Â
On top of this, he hates how he can clearly see that you want to see Hyunjin just as much as he and everyone else does but youâre quicker to comply the moment Chan, and eventually even Yeji, put the two of you on house arrest for the weekend while the rest of the group goes to Incheon. It frustrates him to no end that you keep quietly complying to everyone else when you clearly want to do something else. And, as a result, you end up channeling your energy aggressively elsewhere much like today as you spend most of your Sunday cleaning and redecorating around the expansive house with Minho.Â
âCanât you two like, tone it down a bit?â Jisung complains for the third time this afternoon as he plays with the music software on Chanâs laptop, lifting his feet off of the coffee table in the living room when Minho passes by with a vacuum before pushing a levitating plant that hovers too close for comfort to his face. Somewhere, Ryujin has retreated outside to the garden in order to tend to more plants. âThe houseâs going to get thrashed after a while anyway.âÂ
âAnd why canât you help clean?â You ask back in retort, fluffing up the pillows next to him as you occasionally glance over your shoulder to make sure that the levitating objects around the room arenât falling over. âIf youâre just going to complain while weâre cleaning here, you can just go up to your room since weâre done upstairs, anyway.âÂ
Jisung pouts, crawling over to the other side of the sofa anyway when you gesture for him to move. âThe sunlightâs better here at this time.â He points to the glass windows. âJust finish up quickly already.âÂ
âIf you want to get some sun, you can help Ryujin outside.â You poke back, moving over to the sofa across the coffee table. As you move, the hovering plant pots slowly move to where you want to relocate them to, one moving next to the sofa almost hitting Jisung in the face once more with its leaves. âMake yourself useful, Jisung.âÂ
The witch in question scoffs, closing Chanâs laptop and finally planting his feet back on the floor to a stand. Jisung also hates that tone you use when you order him around because it always makes him do whatever you ask without fail. âFine, Iâm going outside.â He grumbles, trudging to the direction of the back door leading outside and making sure to close the door with a loud thud.Â
Out in the gardens, Ryujin is busy reviving dried up leaves and flowers while a few watering cans go around to water the trees and bushes. Upon seeing Jisung walking down the mini stairs with a pout and furrowed brows, the younger witch canât help but laugh, âY/N banished you outside?âÂ
âIâm supposed to help you but you donât even look like you need help at all.â The prince continues to grumble, setting himself down on a foldable chair and crossing his bare arms over his chest. âIf I do help, I might actually kill the plants. You already know how Iâm terrible I am at healing magic.âÂ
Ryujin acknowledges with a hum, turning her attention back to Chanâs mini garden of camellias. âJust sunbathe, look around or whatever, I can handle this.â She assures with a smile. âI wonât tell Y/N too, donât worry.âÂ
âI think Iâll take you up on that looking around thing later.â Jisung sighs, sinking into his seat and closing his eyes. âIâll nap for now.âÂ
-Â
âHe just does whatever you say, huh?â Minho points out to you as soon as you finish cleaning the living room, tiredly taking up the empty space next to you on the couch with two pillows hugged close to his chest. When you open your mouth to protest, âI know I said itâs amusing when you two bicker over stupid things but itâs actually really nice and quiet when you two reach compromise like this. So peaceful.âÂ
âHe just knows when to not mess with me. Donât exaggerate it.â You scoff at this, pushing Minho away from you as you lift your legs up to the coffee table. âHe knows that I feel the need to be busy when Iâm on edge like this but he was in the way. The least he could do is either be useful around the house too or just stay out of my sight for a while.âÂ
âDonât be too worried, Iâm sure theyâre all being careful and getting to Hyunjin soon.â Minho assures you with a small smile, waving his human world phone in front of you as it displays a flurry of messages from Chan. âIf it makes you feel better, your cousinâs been asking me about you and Jisung as much as heâs been updating me of whatâs happening.â
You frown at this, making Minho chuckle. âHeâs been talking to you but not to me? Iâm his cousin!âÂ
âHe knows youâre redecorating his house in 50 different styles while you wait for him so he just asks about you through me. Donât get it twisted, Y/N.â The older boy continues laughing, carefully shoving a pillow away from his face when you levitate it closer to him. âAnyway, they said that theyâve confirmed that the ogres are still staying at the beach resort so theyâre planning to get to them tonight and confirm if they really took Hyunjin.â
Your expression visibly shifts more positively, eyes widening and mouth hanging agape. âReally?âÂ
âIf things go smoothly, everyone, including Hyunjin, would be home really soon. Until then, Chan has asked me to make sure that you and Jisung donât kill each other or go outside without permission.âÂ
You shove Minho once more at the last statement, mustering up a laugh this time. âHey, weâre not that childish.â You point out with a pout before another thought crosses your mind. âOh, right, I can tell Jisung, right? I mean, itâs just an update anyway.âÂ
âYeah, go ahead.â Minho nods, poking you on your side to get you to stand up. âItâs also getting dark out, call Ryujin in too so we can reheat some leftovers for dinner.âÂ
You scoff at the thought of leftovers for dinner, standing up anyway and heading outside where the sun has indeed set on the horizon. As you walk down the steps leading down to the backyard, you easily spot Ryujin by the back gate as she flirts with one of your neighbors who holds an orange heart up her sleeve but it takes you a moment to see Jisung fast asleep under one of the outdoor umbrellas.Â
âRyujin!â You call for your friend, biting down your lip when the girl sheâs been flirting with awkwardly looks away and your friend in question consequently glares at you for interrupting her. âWhereâs Jisung?âÂ
âThere.â Ryujin quickly points towards the outdoor umbrellas on the far corner of the backyard before turning her gaze back on your neighbor whose heart immediately turns a shy pink at this.Â
You roll your eyes at this with a chuckle before heading over to Jisung, finding him snoring lightly and snuggling into a pillow despite the cold evening breeze. He doesnât budge an inch when you call his name or poke his side, stirring only when you slap his cheek gently awake by instinctively swatting your hand away and mumbling a string of curses for you to go away. âWhat?!âÂ
âItâs starting to get cold out here. Come on, weâre eating dinner in a while.â You respond, taking the pillow from him and grabbing him by the arm to help him stand up. When he doesnât budge, you resort to adjusting his hoodie at least so he doesnât freeze himself to death. âMinho also said that Chanâs been texting him. Everyoneâs okay so far and theyâll interrogate the ogres tonight, maybe even get Hyunjin if they really took him.âÂ
Jisung finally springs awake at this, jumping to a stand in surprise. âWhat? Really? Is thereâwell, is there anything else?â He asks quickly, stumbling over his words in shock while you drag him back inside.Â
Ryujin follows along after a while, running to the kitchen to check what youâre having for dinner. You and Jisung walk a little slower as he rubs his eyes from his surprisingly long nap next to you, somehow not making a fuss this time about your linked arms.Â
âSadly, thatâs only what I got from Minho a while back so I guess weâll have to wait until tomorrow morning for anything new.â You answer his previous question as you head to the kitchen where Ryujin and Minho reheat leftovers and make some new side dishes. When you see Jisungâs ears perk up slightly at your words, you quickly add, âDonât try staying up late just for an update. You should get some more sleep after dinner so you donât look like a ghost when we see Hyunjin again.âÂ
He scoffs at this, sitting down on the dining table and dragging you along with him on the adjacent seat. âHow can I sleep if I know that weâre so close to seeing Hyunjin again after months? Iâll stay up late if I want to!â
âAnd Iâll kill you two if you stay up all night then get all cranky tomorrow when you have to get to class.â Minho cuts you off before you could even speak, setting the dishes down on the table. âOkay, eat up!âÂ
âThat was him, not me.â You shrug at Jisungâs semi-permanent pout with a chuckle, receiving a plate and utensils before thanking Minho for the food. âEat up, Ji.âÂ
You donât even have to glance back over to his direction to know that he has his usual determined look plastered over his face again. Because of the new update on Hyunjinâs situation, heâs suddenly more alert now that he might actually take you up on staying awake the entire night.Â
-
âJisung, are you awake?âÂ
Jisung doesnât really expect you to hold true to your word and check up on him at 3 AM when Ryujin and Minho have both gone to sleep. You suddenly knock on his door while heâs in the middle of a song heâs been trying to write on his guitar lately, startling the poor boy who almost falls off of the window and causes a big fuss about it.Â
âAre you okay in there?â You ask worriedly from outside after knocking for the 4th time, the doorknob clicking gently after. When only shuffles reach your ear on the other side, you immediately add, âHey, Iâm coming in!âÂ
Jisung doesnât even have time to protest, catching a glimpse of you going in and closing the door as a tray of mugs trails behind you. Quickly hiding the guitar by the curtains, he clumsily scrambles up to a stand and retrieves the tray from the air, âH-Hi! You made...tea?âÂ
âThose two mugs are for me.â You pretend to swat his hand away jokingly, joining him on the small balcony on the other side of his window. Spotting his guitar hidden haphazardly on the side, youâre quick to pick it up and slide it over your lap while Jisungâs occupied with the tea, strumming a few chords. Only then, do you also notice his music sheets strewn across the balcony, all labelled with the word âsunshine.â âI didnât know you brought this along. It still plays good, I suppose, but do you still play badly?âÂ
Jisung scowls at you as he sets the tray down next to his notebook, sitting down criss cross once more before swiftly snatching the guitar from your hands. âI play better than you, at least.â Ignoring your protests, he then strums a few chords of his own and continues, âWhy are you still awake, anyway? Donât you have a 9 AM later?âÂ
When he turns to you, he sees you taking a sip of your tea first before answering, âI feel like ditching,â a statement heâs definitely never heard from you before by the way his eyes widen in surprise. âDonât act so surprised! Uniâs just a cover and a way to get hearts while weâre here in the human world, anyway. Since everyone could be here later and thereâs a possibility that weâll see Hyunjin again with them, I wouldnât want to miss a second of him back.âÂ
âDonât tell me, am I rubbing off on you?â Jisung snickers playfully. Deep inside, however, heâs undoubtedly a little impressed. After all, itâs been a while since heâs seen you so carefree outside of royal duties. âThis is bad. Weâre still competing, you know!â
âTch, donât push it. My current countâs quite high so Iâm not that worried.â You shake your head in disbelief, leaning back against the windowsill and gazing ahead to the brightly-lit city. âItâs just that itâs been 5 months since Hyunjinâs gone missing and Yeji started combing every inch of Seoul, only to find a lead out in Incheon. I want to see him as much as you do.âÂ
Jisung nods slowly in agreement, picking up the second mug of tea and taking a sip. Itâs chocolate matcha, the flavour you always craved on elementary school field trips back in the magical realm whenever you missed home or so Felix once said. âItâs been that long, huh? And weâve been here taking our exam for 4 months now.â He muses out loud between sips of tea, warming him up in an instant against the unusually cold night. âTime flies a little weirder when youâre on the other side of the moon, donât you think?âÂ
âI think youâve just been having too much fun flirting with humans.â You point out, gesturing over to his emerald ring. Over the months, youâve noticed that the vessels grow warmer every time you reach a thousand points which is roughly every 100 hearts or so. In the rare moments these days that Jisungâs ring has accidentally brushed against your skin, usually at the bus or when passing dishes along, the stone feels intimidatingly hot and almost burning. âHow much do you have already?âÂ
âEnough to win against you.â He teases playfully as he hums along to his song, making you scoff. âI mean, itâs been fun. Gaining a lot of ecure here has made my magic feel more powerful but, still, I canât help but think sometimes that this whole exam wouldâve been fun if the 4 of us were complete.âÂ
You take another sip of your tea, listening along to Jisungâs humming. âIf Hyunjin didnât disappear beforehand and scared off Lia and her parents from letting her compete...yeah, I guess it wouldâve been much more fun if weâre all competing together and the exam duration was 1 year like normal.â Thinking about it more, you end up chuckling at imagining how this whole exam couldâve gone differently. âBut, at the same time, itâs been fun competing with you so far.âÂ
âGoing soft on me?â He raises a brow with a smirk. âI know weâve been stuck to each other like glue for the past months but you should look out for that heart of yours, it might turn pink for me again.â
âI mean youâve put up a fight so far. Itâs a professional compliment, donât exaggerate it.â You roll your eyes with a slight snicker, making him laugh. You purposely ignore his last comment, though, knowing that he wouldnât really look into your feelings for him, anything but that. âMaybe youâre the one whoâs going soft on me. Seungmin told me about the purple hearts.âÂ
âHe what?!â Jisung exclaims, his smug expression instantly morphing into panic as he almost throws his guitar off of the balcony. âWait, I can explain!âÂ
You shake your head and wave your hand dismissively. âNo, you donât have to! I understand.â You assure with a laugh, placing your hand on his nearest shoulder and making him sit back down when he wobbles over the messy and narrow space. âThough, yeah, I probably wouldâve yelled at you if Seungmin told me any earlier but itâs all said and done now, anyway. I appreciate it, actually.âÂ
âA lot of guys were being creeps to you so I thought...I got protective, okay? Ryujin and Yeji were getting stares too so even Seungmin would do the same thing to protect them.â Jisung pouts. âI know weâre in a competition and weâre supposed to rake up a bunch of hearts but your dignityâs much more important than some stupid crown...âÂ
âI know, and I also know that you wouldâve done it for Lia if she were here.â You nod understandingly, mustering up a small appreciative smile. Jisung can be sweet if he wants to, you conclude internally. âAh, seriously, just imagine if there was 4 of us competing. This wouldâve been much more fun and less stressful. You wouldâve gotten your ass handed to you when you wanted to race to the moon.âÂ
âTch, Hyunjin wouldâve taken all of the red ecures for himself.â Jisung adds, sharing in your quiet laughs now that the conversationâs shifted once more. âMuch like how he charms everyone back home. He might even win, like he always does in every challenge the elders give us. Heâs just the favourite!âÂ
âI canât wait for him to come home safely. Heâs been gone for too long.â You sigh against your tea, tiredly adjusting to the uncomfortable space of the window. Seeing this from the corner of his eyes, Jisung doesnât hesitate to pass you a pillow and nearby blankets this time which youâre more than grateful for. âI canât wait for all of this to be over and go home, just visit again when I feel like it.âÂ
âMe too. I canât wait to see him.â Jisung sighs, peering down onto the balcony as he adjusts his guitar on his lap. âAnd I canât wait to go home, too.âÂ
And just then, the car that Chan used to drive everyone over to Incheon materializes at the front porch, spewing out Chan, your friends, and Hyunjin whoâs supported by Seungmin and Yeji.
five out of six monthsÂ
Hyunjin sports distinctly black cuts and gashes across his arms and legs when you greet the group in front of the house, similar to the ones Chan and Changbin also sported one time when the two also had an encounter with dark magic. Limping on his right leg and supported by his arms, Yeji and Seungmin used their magic to lift him over to the nearest sofa once theyâve reached the other side of Chanâs protective spell from the front door while the rest of the group crash into the vast expanse of the living room.Â
âI tried healing him as much as I can so itâs easier for you and Ryujin.â Seungmin huffs, tiredly sitting down on the ground by the coffee table. âHeâs mostly fine, just exposed to a lot of dark magic.âÂ
âAnd you guys? Are you okay? Is anyone else hurt?â You ask worriedly, darting your eyes over to Chan, Yeji, and Chaeryoung who all individually affirm to you that theyâre not nursing any big injuries. âWhat happened?âÂ
At that moment, Jisung arrives in the living room with a half-sleepy Minho and a frantically running Ryujin who immediately makes a beeline to Hyunjin and Yeji. Standing next to you, he echoes the exact same question to Seungmin. âWhat happened? Is Hyunjin going to be okay?âÂ
You kneel down in front of Hyunjin, right next to Ryujin, and examine the cuts and gashes. Meanwhile, Jisung sits next to Seungmin while Minho runs over to Chan. âTurns out, theyâve been keeping Hyunjin to try and get him to activate the artifact.â Seungmin answers Jisungâs question after a moment, taking out the stolen compass that Hyunjin was supposed to retrieve from this world. âThen they heard that you and Jisung were going to proceed with the exam. So they tried using him as bait as well but the protective spells the elders casted on you two made it hard for them to find you even when they planned to separate our group.âÂ
âWe got there before they could manipulate my brother into it with dark magic.â Yeji continues tiredly in between casting her own spells, making her smaller wounds and a sprained ankle disappear. âThey were quite hostile but we managed. Itâs just that Hyunjin still hasnât woken up since we took him.âÂ
âThen arenât you glad we stayed at home, Ji?â You mumbled under your breath as you and Ryujin casted spells to identify the magic needed to heal the half-conscious Hyunjinâs injuries. âHyunjinâs probably not waking up because of exposure. Weâll have to determine just how much dark magic those witches used.âÂ
Behind you, Jisung grumbles stubbornly at your comment. âSo, is Hyunjin okay? Whatâs the diagnosis?â
Hovering your hand over Hyunjinâs chest, his heart suddenly reflects a horrifying black over your magic and making yours and Ryujinâs eyes widen. âOh noâŠâÂ
âWhat?â Suddenly, Jisungâs next to you and peering over Hyunjinâs ecure. âWhat the hell? Why is his heart black?âÂ
Ryujin then places her hands over Hyunjinâs forehead, going through his fresher memories as her eyes turn a bright blue. âHeâs...itâs an ancient spell, a really powerful one.â She eventually concludes, turning to Chan after. âChan, do you think you can take a look at this?âÂ
Across the room, Chan stands up with Minhoâs help, having just treated a healing cut on his leg, and sits on Ryujinâs other side to briefly access the same memories. âThe three of us can do it,â He gestures to you and Ryujin with pursed lips. âBut itâll take hours and a whole lot of ecure. Weâll need to purify his heart with an equally powerful spell.âÂ
From the corner of your eye, you see Jisung immediately turn to you in worry, as if he already knows what youâre going to say. âY/N, donâtââ
But youâre already reaching for your locket, forcing the stone to reveal its contents. âI can give up mine. Itâll save you both your energies and time.â You assure, tuning out Jisungâs protests.
âA-Are you sure?â Ryujin asks worriedly, echoing Jisungâs concerns. Next to her, Chan shakes his head at you in equal concern. âY/N, these are your ecures for the candidacy exam, you canât justânot right now when youâre almost doââ
âThatâs not important right now. Whatâs important is that we save Hyunjin.â You nod without any hesitation. âAnyway, I have enough for both purifying Hyunjinâs heart and healing his wounds. Itâs fine.âÂ
You then take out more hearts from your locket, the clumped crystals of oranges, greens, pinks, and reds hovering above Hyunjin as he continues lulling in and out of consciousness and his body tries rejecting the prior spells Yeji casted to help him heal. Before you could fully empty out the vessel, however, Jisungâs hand with his emerald ring flies over yours to stop you. âWait!â He exclaims, startling you, Ryujin, and Chan. âIâll give up some of mine too. Donât empty yours out.â
âJiââÂ
ââY/N.â He snaps frustratingly, raising his voice and confusing you further. âPlease, let me help! I donât want you to empty your count, Iâm not letting you.âÂ
This seems to effectively catch you off-guard. Jisung then takes this as an opportunity to stop you, not letting your hand go while he summons his own collected hearts out from his ring and firmly making sure that you donât argue with him further until Chan has reluctantly made sure that you have enough ecures to convert into magic. Even then, he doesnât let you go by your hand and instead moves his over to your free hand while Chan instructs you and Ryujin on how to purify a black heart.Â
âJ-Jisung.â You call for him once your initial annoyance of him stopping you has died down, eyes widening when he glances back at you with worry. âI need my two hands.âÂ
âOh, shit. Sorry.â He lets go of your hand immediately, keeping his hands down on his lap before leaving the three of you to check on Seungmin, Yeji, and Chaeryoung. âSorryâŠâ
You cough out awkwardly as he leaves, glaring at Ryujin when she musters up a teasing smile despite your current predicament.Â
âHeâs right, you know.â Chan comments after a while, instructing you the following spells while the dark color of Hyunjinâs ecure fades to a glowing white.Â
âDonât start.â When you send a glare over your own cousinâs way, however, he quickly drops the subject with a shrug.Â
Purifying a darkened heart, as it turns out, lasts until the very break of dawn as the three of you exhaust the ecures you and Jisung have put out to heal Hyunjin. As time ticks by agonizingly slow for Hyunjin who could only lay back on the sofa and absorb all of your energies to heal himself, Minho eventually gets everyone to clear the living room and sleep in the much more comfortable guest rooms after making sure that no one is greatly injured before hurling himself to the kitchen and make breakfast.Â
But you see Jisung stay from the corner of your eye, taking up space on your opposite side to steal glances at you or comfort Hyunjin. From the way his eyebrows furrow over his sleepy eyes and how he refuses to leave even when you awkwardly tell him off, you could tell that he too canât make out your previous exchange.Â
ââY/N. Please, let me help! I donât want you to empty your count, Iâm not letting you.â You know that he acted the way he did because it was Hyunjin that you were trying to save, one of his best friends. But the way he sounded so angry, the way he snapped at you in the spur of the moment, a small part of your thoughts wants to make you think that he had other reasons for doing what he did.Â
âHyunjin? How are you feeling?â Chan asks after 2 hours of nonstop spellcasting, halting you and Ryujin in your steps after. âCan you sit up?âÂ
Your eyes turn blue at the same time you see Jisungâs turn green, surveying Hyunjinâs heart for any hints of leftover dark magic. Meanwhile, Hyunjin struggles to sit up with Jisungâs help, tiredly groaning under his breath. âMuch b-better.â He manages to stumble out after a moment, mustering up a small smile despite the dizzying and overwhelming fel. âThanks, you guys.âÂ
You sigh in relief, resting your back against the coffee table behind you before nodding. âFinallyâŠâÂ
âCome on, Hyunnie, Iâll move you upstairs.â Chan volunteers, standing up from his position on the floor and briefly stretching his arms out. Turning to you, Ryujin, and Jisung, he then adds, âYou guys get some rest too. Just skip for today and tomorrow. Iâll write to everyone back home.âÂ
You donât even argue against your cousin this time, finding yourself nodding when he gives you the same look he always does whenever you intend on shouldering some work for him. Standing up from the floor, you, Ryujin, and Jisung then head upstairs in silence.Â
The entire walk, you feel Jisung stealing glances over to you but you decide to not act on it, shaking your head when he suddenly opens his mouth to speak before the two of you could go on your separate ways.Â
âY/N, waitââ âGoodnight, Jisung.âÂ
-
Growing up, Jisung has always relied on two people in helping him through the crisis of accidentally going too far with you: Chan and Felix. Chan, obviously, because heâs your cousin and the only other friend he has who harbors an inkling of a braincell and Felix because heâs everyoneâs favourite and he knows the kinds of snacks that get on your good graces. These moments when heâs actually pushed your buttons too far are rare (as much as the two of you like to express your annoyance over each other, youâve actually come to understand that this is just your dynamic growing up), but Jisung personally keeps a list of steps to do in situations like this anyway. Now more than ever, it seems, because suddenly, it feels weird and awkward being around each otherâand not the usual kind.Â
But as fate would have it, Chan is busy working out how to safely get Hyunjin home and explaining to the elders what happened. If normally Jisung would be asking Chan first about you and what he could say when he confronts you, this time heâs asking all of them to his twin brother whoâs more than willing to listen (after listening to Yeji, Ryujin, and Chaeryoung gossip everything to him prior, of course).
âWhy did you do that anyway?â Felix points out on the other side of the call, snuggling into a pillow as night falls on both realms. Itâs been 3 days since Hyunjin returned and both the house and the officials back at home have been busy arranging his return with Yeji, Seungmin, Ryujin, and Chaeryoung; only allowing for the twins to talk in the late hours of the night. âAnd you said it angrily too from what Ryujin told me. No offense, bro, Iâd feel a little weird if you raised your voice at me, too, then offered up half of your collection on their behalf.âÂ
Jisung groans in frustration, running his hand through his hair as he shuffles uncomfortably around his bed sheets. âI donât know, itâs just...I was thinking of a lot of things.âÂ
âLike what?âÂ
âThis candidacy exam, what Chan told me beforehand, Hyunjin, Y/NâŠâ The older twin purses his lips, taking his eyes away from Felix to gaze down at his hands. The emerald ring is much cooler now after losing ecure but somehow, it feels heavy on Jisungâs ring finger. âI thought that itâd be unfair if they lose all of their ecure at this point in the race, trying to save Hyunjin, then the elders might not be too pleased about it when we return. But most importantly, I thought about what Chan told me when Minho first arrived, about how Y/Nâs always jumping at every opportunity to help other people without thinking too much of themself. I was right there with my own vessel of hearts for them to use and if I just let them empty out theirs, then Iâd be letting them get the short end of the stick in the long run again.âÂ
Felix nods along understandingly at his brotherâs words, all the while trying to hide a smile behind his hand. So Yeji was right! âSo why did you call me, then? You seem to have your reasons sorted out, just tell Y/N what you told me.â He shrugs after Jisungâs extensive speech, giggling at the dramatic reaction that he receives from his brother after. âI know you guys arenât those emotional kinds of people to each other but you said so yourself that Y/Nâs been quieter these days and that itâs been eating at your conscience. I say you just go for it and tell them how you feel.âÂ
âIâm not you, Lix. Y/Nâs going to laugh at me.â Jisung pouts helplessly. âI canât just tell them that.âÂ
âYouâre so dramatic! It just implies that you care about Y/N like a decent human being. Anyone in your situation who knows what you know about them wouldâve been considerate enough to do the same thing.â Felix argues back, rubbing his temples at how the older boyâs acting. âDonât get it twisted, brother...unless you want it to, of course.âÂ
âYa, and whatâs that supposed to mean?!âÂ
âFigure it out yourself.â Felix sticks his tongue out teasingly before laughing and waving a dismissive hand. âAnyway, Yeji told me that Y/Nâs been craving blueberry pancakes lately. You can just make them right now and give it tomorrow so you donât have to go out.âÂ
âIf anything, I want to leave the house right now and never come back.â Jisung grumbles back in frustration before sighing in defeat. âFor the first time, I canât believe youâre no help at all, Lix. Iâm hanging up.âÂ
âTch, you just canât handle the truth, Sung. Anyway, I have to go too, mom and dad are asking me to come to this thing. Iâll update you on it later! Love you! Bye!â Felix then waves to the call one last time before hanging up, leaving Jisung in the uncomfortable silence of his room.Â
Jisung sighs against the heavy blankets, throwing his phone to the other side of the mattress before ultimately deciding on standing up and heading to your room across the hall. Fuck it, he thinks to himself, itâs not like I like them or anything like that! Nothing to worry about! Letâs not get it twisted.Â
When he opens the door, however, the first person he unexpectedly sees outside the hallways is you just as you close the door behind your own room. âY/N!â He ends up blurting out loud in the moment, catching your attention with wide eyes. Not knowing what else to say, the first thought that comes to mind is, âAre you going to Hyunjinâs room?âÂ
You furrow your brows in confusion, shaking your head slowly. âNo, Iâm going to the kitchen?âÂ
âO-Oh.â He runs his hand through his hair once more in nervousness, nodding along and hiding the heat rising up his neck in embarrassment. âWell, Iâm going there too. Mind if I join you?âÂ
You simply nod in response, walking down the end of the hallway with him in relative silence. He hasnât seen you much since Hyunjinâs arrived either since you spent most of your time checking your mutual friend for his condition and brewing tea. The dramatic gears in Jisungâs head would like to think that itâs just pure convenience.Â
âSo, what did you and Felix talk about?â âHowâs Hyunjin?âÂ
Jisung glances over to you on his right just as you mirror his actions, the gesture somehow making him flustered this time around as heâs quick to look away. âS-Sorry. Um, we justâtalked about how things are back home.â He shrugs in his best feigned nonchalance, mentally cringing at how visibly awkward he looks as the two of you go down the stairs anyway. Not that itâs a lie, anyway, he and Felix did talk about other topics besides you. âEverythingâs pretty busy back home since the elders are talking about how Hyunjin coming back is going to affect the exam now.âÂ
âOh.â You nod along almost absentmindedly. âThatâs...yeah, Iâve heard about it too. Itâs pretty hectic on my momâs end right now.âÂ
âSo...howâs Hyunjin?â Jisung chimes in almost a little too quickly, feeling even more awkward that he accidentally brought up your candidacy exam again. Stupid, stupid, stupid!
You purposely pretend to not notice anyway, answering his questions carefully as you approach a curve into the spiral staircase. âHeâs regaining his strength at least. Still on bedrest but he should be okay by the weekend when Changbin fetches him and the others.â The two of you then pass through the living room to get to the kitchen, finding Minho and Chan cuddled up on one of the sofas as they watch a movie on the television.Â
The kitchen, on the other hand, is deserted when you turn on the lights which Jisung internally thanks every guest in the house for before taking a deep breath. âAbout what I said back then, by the wayâŠâ He starts carefully, catching your attention before you could even detach yourself from him to open the nearby fridge. You freeze a few steps ahead of him, making the poor boy gulp nervously. âUm, Iâm sorry that I raised my voice at you. I shouldnât have done that, even when I was stressing out.âÂ
Much like when he actually did raise his voice, you momentarily freeze in your spot before eventually shaking your head reassuringly and moving over to the fridge. âItâs alright, you donât need to apologize for that.â You add with a small smile, taking out the fruit bowl from the fridge. âIs that why youâve been quiet these past days? Itâs okay, really.âÂ
âI havenât beenâitâs you whoâsââ Jisung stops himself halfway before he could even start another argument, biting down his lip before shaking his head. Walking over to the stove area, he then opens a few cabinets in search of the pancake mix while you shuffle around the area behind him. âA little, yeah. Itâs just that it looked like it bothered you so it bothered me too.â
When Jisung then glances over his shoulder, he sees you approaching with the fruit bowl hugged close to your chest. âI thought about it a few times. After that, I just thought that you were bothered so I couldnât talk to you after.â You explain slowly, voice growing louder as you set the bowl next to him. In the dim lights of the kitchen, he suddenly canât tell if youâre lying or not. âBut itâs all good now. Are you making pancakes?âÂ
Jisung nods sheepishly, finally finding the pancake mix in the deeper crevices of the cabinet and taking it out with a pan and spatula from the adjacent cabinet. âNo, but you have to know thatâthatââ
âHm? What?â You raise your brows curiously, taking the pan and spatula for him before proceeding to the stove and twisting the knobs to preheat.Â
âYouâre not letting me finish.â Jisung points out with a feigned disapproving situation while quickly preparing the pancake mix, one which you somehow find amusing enough to laugh at. âCome on, donât laugh, my twin made me say a bunch of things then coerced me into telling you so Iâdââ
âYeah, I know.âÂ
ââSo, I appreciate it if youâd lisâwait, you know?!â His feigned expression then turns into one of surprise once more as you nod and break into giggles. âW-What?!âÂ
âYou were being really loud, Hyunjin was even complaining to me from the next room by phone that he canât sleep because of you.â You chuckle in amusement, nudging him by the arm when you notice that heâs slowed down his mixing. âHe said something about you complaining to Felix about something or whatever. I donât know, I was on a call with Lia.âÂ
âThen why did youâ? So, you just came out here for pancakes?!âÂ
âNo! I wanted to hear what you were going to say! I didnât hear any word besides the pancakes, I swear...well, not clearly at least.âÂ
By now, all of the awkwardness has immediately dissipated as Jisung stops mixing the pancake mix altogether to turn to you and cross his arms. âYouâre unbelievable.â He pretends to roll his eyes and scoff at you, earning him a glare. You then swipe the pancake mix from his hands, pouring them into the pan in big circles. âAnd you still have the audacity to make me do this pancake mix.âÂ
âWell, youâre already mixing it so might as well.â You shrug with a knowing smile before nudging him again by the handle of the spatula. âNow, go on, what were you going to say?âÂ
Jisung shoots you one last incredulous look but you effectively counter it by encouraging him, promising that you âwonât laugh.â âAh, well...I just wanted to say that you shouldnât go all out wasting all of your collected hearts at this point, not when weâre almost done with the exam.â He blurts out, gazing down and fiddling with the fruit bowl while you take spoonfuls of blueberries from it to mix with the pancakes. âI want to win but it wonât be fun if your tally suddenly drops, right?âÂ
When he looks up, youâre raising your brow at his last comment as you make more pancakes. âI mean, I know you want to do whatâs best for everyone but you have to look out for yourself too. Geez.â With a sigh, he then corrects which makes you nod in agreement. âA-And I guess lean on us too. Weâre your family and friends, donât shoulder all of the work for us all the time.âÂ
âI doubt I can lean on you.â You tease, flipping through your second batch of pancakes to cook. When Jisung sends a glare your way, you simply stick your tongue out at him. âKidding.â Â
âI get all emotional and all you say is that you doubt you can lean on me. UnbelievableâŠâ Jisung scoffs, stuffing his mouth with more blueberries in feigned annoyance.Â
The blueberry-filled pancakes are all eventually set on a plate you find on your opposite side, stacked up as a tall tower leaning on one side. Carefully passing Jisung the plate, you then twist the stoveâs knobs off and reply, âYou also made me cook the pancakes you wanted to make for me so I think that makes us even.âÂ
âY/N!â He whines between mouthfuls of blueberries as you move around him to transfer the pan and spatula to the sink.Â
You sigh in defeat, chuckling when you meet gazes once more and see him sulking with his cheeks full. âRight, right, Iâm sorry!â You then beckon him over to the dining table, taking the fruit bowl on his side. âA-And...you know, thank you for that. Weâre all good now, right?âÂ
âIf you are.âÂ
âDefinitely. Want to eat with me? I still owe you that meal from our first day.âÂ
six out of six months
Your mother as well as the high jury of elders from back home eventually proposed that you and Jisung finish your Crown Candidacy exam while Hyunjin, should he eventually announce that he wants to participate as well in the incoming 6 months, do his under stricter supervision in the following year. This ensures fairness in your situations, that yours and Jisungâs efforts arenât wasted in the past 5 months while also thinking of Hyunjin who wasnât around in time for the traditional schedule of the exam. When Hyunjin was escorted home by Changbin and Felix, however, he briefly hinted towards a plan on refusing the candidacy and the exam. He left with the others before you or Jisung could even ask him about it.Â
Regardless, you and your sole competitor easily fall back into the race as soon as Hyunjin, Yeji, Seungmin, and Chaeryoung have settled their business in the human world and went home, returning to university over a week later to regain the ecures that you lost. Not that itâs suddenly harder, anyway. Timely as it is, an announcement for a school festival at the end of the month has Jisung signing up to perform while you join the organizing committee to spend more time with your human friends.Â
In the time that youâve spent in the human world, youâve made many genuine friends beyond collecting their ecure for your exam, especially in your classmates Yuna and Jeongin. Though they donât know about your true nature, the two have unknowingly aided you a lot in your mission by accompanying you through the different activities around university.Â
Yuna, in particular, was even the one who first mentioned the school festival to you, encouraging you to join the events committee with her and invite Jisung to perform. âItâs free backstage passes and we can see all of the artists up close!â She sighed dreamily on the day she showed you the gold and red poster that she picked up from the department bulletin board. âAnd come on, youâre really good at organizing stuff! We should do it together!â
And more hearts to collect, you thought to yourself when you accepted and attended the orientation.
And more hearts it was, indeed, as you spend the next 3 weeks meeting people from different colleges as you and Yuna are assigned to helping organize the music performance for the end of the festival. With your previous experience fulfilling your duties back at home, itâs unsurprisingly easier for you to juggle the work assigned to youâcontacting students to perform, arranging the program flow, and turning the university football field into a makeshift mini concert stadiumâwith socializing and fulfilling your original mission of collecting hearts.Â
Across from your room at home, on the other hand, Jisung has been busy spending the same time making his own music to perform at the music festival. You invited him to perform some time after starting your work with the festival committeeâwell, your friends insisted that you invite him and Chan after finding out that the famous DJ, CB97, is your cousin and that you and the âCollege of Psychology Cutieâ commute home together (âDonât tell me...are you guys secretly dating?!â Yuna had shamelessly asked during one of your meetings, to which you had to smack your hand over her mouth and improvise a cover story for you and Jisung that you live in the same neighbourhood).Â
Jisung accepted at the thought that he could garner a huge crowd of hearts from this opportunity, cooping himself up in his room right after the following days that followed to complete his 15-minute set. Ever since, all youâve heard coming from his room in the middle of the night would be guitar strums, drum loops, and the faintest hints of Jisungâs voice singing along to freestyle raps and lines.Â
He mostly sang about love, of all things; something you, Minho, and Chan immediately noticed in the next 3 Friday nights that the three of you would be huddled in the living room to watch a movie, only to hear Jisung repeating lines as if he was talking to someone in Chanâs home studio. You wanted to ask about it out of pure curiosity, and just the general worry that he might not be looking after his heart while finishing your exam after all, but decided against it in favor of waiting for the final product at the music festival.
Fortunately, the month somehow went by in almost a flash as you and Jisung both got busy preparing and collecting more hearts on the side. Before you know it, it was the afternoon of the music festival and Felix is suddenly back in the human realm to accompany you and Minho to the school festival.Â
âSo, did he tell you what he prepared for tonight?â Felix asks you as the three of you walk around the festival grounds. Over the course of 3 weeks, you and a large team of student volunteers have managed to haul in food stalls, arcade booths, and rides from the quad all the way to the football field for this festival, amenities which you yourself havenât tried yet because of your busy schedule but Felix and Minho have both been so overwhelmingly excited to check out even on the bus trip to your university.Â
In response to the princeâs answer, you shake your head with a small pout. âI just hear him all over the house and I didnât really want to pry if he didn't want to tell me anything.â You point out, the two of you suddenly changing the course of your mindless walk as Minho points to a crossbow shoot booth. âWhy? Doesnât he tell you what heâs been working on?âÂ
âNo! He stops whatever heâs doing whenever we call, even when I ask him to play just a little bit of his work.â Felix is quick to mirror your pout, only for it to disappear when Minho jokes that the two of you help him cheat in the booth as he picks up a crossbow. âI thought since you guys are living together, youâd know better than me.âÂ
âAh, you kids just wait until Jisung and Chan perform later.â Minho dismisses your concerns, holding the fake crossbow up properly while the staff manning the booth prepares the targets on the other side. âNow, help me win Chan a giant wolf.âÂ
You roll your eyes at Minho, shrugging at Felix. âI guess heâs right. Letâs just help Minho get a giant wolf first.âÂ
-
Chan and Jisung arrive at university 10 minutes before the music festival from Chanâs studio halfway across the city, initially unable to find you in the crowd of organizers as they set up backstage with Yuna and Jeonginâs help until you call Chan late that youâre âbabysittingâ Minho and Felix.Â
âTheyâve somehow teamed up and have been competing with the rigged booths since we arrived.â You explained over the voice call, the distant sounds of Minho and Felix yelling while tossing metal rings around almost muffling your own. âIâll be on my way in a while as soon as Minho leaves the ring toss alone but Yuna and Jeongin are there. Just ask them if you guys need anythâoh my gods, Felix, you won another plushie? Thatâs so cool! Wait, Iâm on a call with Chan!âuh, yeah. Iâll be there in a second!âÂ
The commotion on your end makes the two boys laugh, even as you bid your goodbyes and end the call, but especially Jisung whoâs been looking nervous since he arrived. Throwing his head back in a laugh as he tunes his guitar, he comments, âThatâs a bit unexpected. I didnât know my brother and your boyfriend would get along like that, and this quickly!âÂ
âBeating out rigged games sounds about right.â Chan chuckles along, seated on a plastic chair and running a quick check on his equipment. Turning to the younger boy, he then asks, âAre you still nervous?âÂ
âMe? Nah, I wasnât even nervous to begin with!â At this, Jisungâs laughs naturally die down to an uncertain shake of his head. He dismisses with a scrunch up nose which Chan immediately raises a brow at.Â
âCome on, Sung, I practically raised you with the other kids.â Chan proceeds to roll his eyes as Jisungâs brief confident facade crumbles down slowly. âWhatâs up?âÂ
The boy in question eventually sighs in defeat, shoulders slumping against the plastic chair he occupies. âFine, maybe Iâm a bit nervous! Just a little bit, though, I can still get on stage later! I mean, itâs not like performing here is gonna be different from back home like you said on the way here butâŠâ
âBut what?â Chan asks patiently, glancing up to see Jisungâs gaze fixed down on his yellow acoustic guitar. When the younger boy doesnât respond immediately, he then continues, âIâve heard bits and pieces of what youâve been working on this month and all of the songs sound great. Youâll catch a lot of hearts tonight with them, Iâm sure. What are you worried about?â
Jisung looks up from his guitar and opens his mouth to speak, only to get cut off when you come in the performerâs tent running and balancing different kinds of microphones in your hands. âSorry Iâm late!â You announce in between tired pants, catching both his and Chanâs attention as you pass the microphones around the artists with Jeongin who instinctively comes to your aid. âI was with my friends and they wouldnât budge from the ring toss!âÂ
âI think Iâm going to faint.â Jisung mumbles under his breath with furrowed brows, loud enough for only Chan to hear, until you approach them last with their microphones.Â
âMics?â You offer obliviously, holding up the last 2 hand mics in your possession. Passing one to Chan quickly, you then sit down next to Jisung and pass him his hand mic. âHey, youâre up fourth, right?âÂ
Jisung glances over to Chan with a panicked look but the older boy simply shakes his head with a chuckle and focuses on his keyboard. Turning to you, Jisung then nods quickly with a hum before gazing down at his guitar and the laptop heâs set up on the table in front of you two.Â
Immediately sensing his odd behavior, you then hover your hands in the space between the two of you in a quick spell, eventually verifying his nervous feelings. âYeah, totally not nervous.â You chuckle in amusement, laughing even more when he turns to you and whines in complaint.Â
âYa! Donât do that!âÂ
âWell, itâs not like youâre that good at hiding your nervousness!â You point out in defense, holding your hands up in front of you in between uncontrollable fits of giggles. When the glare he sends your way doesnât relax one bit, you then fish out a small quokka plush from your backpack. âAnyway, Felix was kinda expecting that youâd be a little nervous so wanted me to give you this plushie he won at the milk bottle game with Minho for good luck. He wouldâve given it himself but LUCY was already performing when we came here so he dragged Minho to the audience area before I could even bring him here.âÂ
You then place the plush toy on the table right next to his laptop, looking around once to make sure that no one is looking your way before mouthing a quick spell to shrink the quokka into something smaller that he can hang on his guitar strap. As you do so, Chan notices how Jisungâs ears are quick to turn red as he follows your every movement. âYou can stick it to your guitar strap and bring it with you to the stage.â You point out once youâre done, only then noticing his stares. âWhat?âÂ
âHuh?â Jisung shakes his head absentmindedly, mentally slapping himself back to reality before scrambling to pick up the plush toy by the chain you added on top of its head and tying it to the small hole along the edge of his guitar strap. âO-Oh, yeah, thanks!â
You chuckle, just as Yuna suddenly calls for you to help in getting the next actâs microphone stands on stage. Standing up, you then pat Jisungâs shoulder reassuringly, saying one last, âDonât be nervous!â before running off again to where most of your committee members are.Â
Once youâre out of earshot, only then does Chan look up from his equipment once more but this time with a knowing grin and squinted eyes. âYeah, Sung, donât be nervous!âÂ
Jisung rolls his eyes in front of the older boy at this, securing the quokka plushie on his guitar strap one last time. âShut up.âÂ
-
Your committee heads lay you off of work just as Jisung heads to the stage for his set, the small quokka plush you gave him dangling behind his fretboard with a toothy grin while he sets up his laptop and greets the energetic crowd. When you discreetly scan the peopleâs ecures while standing behind the curtains, you quickly spot a growing number of pinks and oranges. âSuch a charmer.â Chan notes, eyes also blue when you look up at him.Â
You nod in agreement, reverting back to your original color as more of your peers gather around the curtains to listen to Jisungâs introduction. âUm, hi, Iâm Han Jisung from the Psych department.â You hear him greet with a shy chuckle over the microphone, earning him another wave of cheers. Behind you, even Yuna and Jeongin cheer despite Jisung having his back partially facing you. âThis is my first time performing here at uni and the songs that Iâve prepared so please go easy on me.âÂ
You then turn to Chan again, taking a sideways step closer to him as a thought crosses your mind. âHey, Chan,â You call for him in a lower voice, craning your head up when he leans towards you. âHave you heard of the songs heâs going to perform tonight? You were together before coming here, right?âÂ
âOnly a little bit. We mostly talked while we were at the studio.â Chan shrugs in response. âI think he wanted it to be a surprise to everyone.âÂ
On stage, Jisung then checks his guitar one last time before announcing the name of the first song. âSo, this first song is something that Iâve been thinking about since I moved here. Itâs called âClose.ââ He says, pressing play on his loops and singing the first lines of the song. âCan you tell me about you? You, seen from afar. I just don't want to watch. Yeah Just tell me about you.â
Jisung is a great performer, thereâs no doubt about it. Though youâve grown up hearing him sing and rap at your more casual events back at home, he always manages to surprise you every time he performs just with the way he enjoys himself on stage. You can see him smile widely from the side of the stage, his nervousness long gone as he interacts with the crowd and collects the pink crystal hearts that float above your heads.Â
âHeâs really goodâŠâ You murmur, more to yourself than to Chan, as you find yourself gently swaying to the song. âWhat was he even worried about? Itâs a great songâŠâÂ
Chan glances knowingly at you, a small smile playing on his lips as you sing along to the next round of the chorus. âI donât think he has nothing to worry about too, not right now at least.âÂ
âHm?â âNothing.âÂ
-
In truth, even with the positive response from the crowd and the amount of ecures heâs collected from this set alone, Jisung is still nervous for his last song. âSunshineâ was supposed to be just another warm-up song with barely a cohesive topic, a compilation of sketches about his experiences in the human world that he spent his free time on when he wasnât collecting hearts these past 6 months. As more time passed by, however, and the time of your exam was suddenly coming to a close, they eventually took a different direction without him even realizing it until you were inviting him to perform at this music festival.Â
The times that the two of you would bicker just to laugh at each other in the end, the competition that brought the bests and worsts in you, and your chocolate matcha tea and musings on the one time you sat down with him on his balcony. Eventually, you were all he was writing about. On top of the nervousness that comes with finishing the competition youâve found yourselves in for half a year and finding out who will be declared the winner, Jisung was more nervous about the thought that youâre just behind the stage curtains with Chan, anticipating his next song.Â
âFor my last song, I picked this one for someone I know whom Iâve spent a lot of time with these past few months.â He confesses shyly in front of the crowds. Among the hundreds of people that came tonight, he easily spots his twin brother in front of the barriers with Minho, sporting the most exaggerated surprised face ever. âI was hoping that when all of this is said and over, weâd get well-deserved breaks...maybe music and tea at night again or something.âÂ
Jisung doesnât have to turn around to gauge your initial reaction as he begins the song, Felixâs expression turning into that of giddiness as he looks over at the stage curtains is enough to set every gear in his head to pump out more nervousness. Instead, he pushes through until halfway to the song before he could steal his first glance over to you since beginning his set.Â
With his eyes still an emerald green from scanning the crowdâs ecures, your eyes meet under the harsh stage lights as he sings the bridge. âThis place is quiet without a sound ye ye ye. Quiet except for the sound of our breaths ye ye ye.â He doesnât intend to look again, not in that split second before heâs turning his gaze back to the crowd of cellphone lights and LED signs, but he sees your heartâs reflection once more.Â
Reminiscent of when you first confessed in middle school, a pinkish heart floats by the sleeves of your sweater, almost looking red if he just looked longer. You didnât even turn away this time and simply just stood there, heat visibly rising up your neck.Â
Reminiscent of when you first confessed in middle school, a pinkish heart floats by the sleeves of your sweater, almost looking red if he just looked longer. This time around, however, you donât turn away to try and hide it.Â
And this time around, Jisung doesnât childishly call you out for it or ignores it. This time, it makes his own heart swell at the thought.Â
-
The car ride home, with Chan on the wheel and three extra boxes of equipment most of the backseats in his SUV, is a comfortable and awkward mix of quiet between you and Jisung as the two of you are forced to sit next to each other in the cramped space. You sit by the window, using it as an excuse to peer outside and avoid any kind of small talk from the boys, while Jisung has hisi eyes glued to his phone while a sleeping Felix snuggles into his shoulder. The only human noise in the car, as it seems, is coming from Minho and Chan as the two recall the songs the latter and Jisung performed at the program.Â
Itâs even quieter at the thought that you, Jisung, and Felix will fly back to the magical realm tomorrow, something that Minho reminds you when he suddenly asks, âRight, what do you kids want me to cook for lunch later, by the way?âÂ
The question comes right as the car suddenly comes to an abrupt stop at Chanâs garage, masking the way you and Jisung simultaneously jump in surprise. You instinctively glance over to him after with wide eyes, before gazing over at Minho who has a poorly-hidden snicker on his expression from the front passenger seat. âUm,â You stutter out awkwardly, glaring at Minho when he smirks teasingly over your way. âAnythingâs fine for me.âÂ
Jisung nods over to your direction in agreement. âYeah, anythingâs fine.âÂ
Minho nods with pursed lips, as if he was biting down a laugh. âDoes crispy pork belly sound good?â He asks, earning him nods from you. âOkay. You guys have been quiet back here this entire time, you guys good?âÂ
âYeah?â âTotally.âÂ
Clearly unconvinced, Minho shakes his head and scoffs before twisting his upper body to face front once more, unbuckling his seatbelt and opening the car door next to him. âOh, kidsâŠâÂ
You roll your eyes at the comment before stealing a glance over at Jisung again, only to find the boy already staring at you. âW-What?â You manage to ask this time despite your initial surprise. In front of you, Chan has already turned the engine off and left the driverâs seat to open the back of the car. âYou okay, Ji?âÂ
He hums almost absentmindedly, phone now set down on his lap as he fiddles with his hands nervously. âYeah, umââ He stutters out, biting his lips down once. Briefly glancing at his side, he then gestures towards his twin and adds, âWait, sorry, um, let me wake Lix first.âÂ
âOkay.â You nod awkwardly, deciding to unbuckle your own seatbelt and open the car door next to you. Jisung then gently shakes Felix awake, leading his brother out through the same car door since the opposite oneâs blocked by more of his and Chanâs equipment.Â
âYou go on ahead, Lix, Iâll just talk to Y/N.â You hear Jisung say as the three of you now stand outside in the cold, levitating boxes of instruments and computers flying over your head and heading inside the house.Â
Felix nods at this immediately, sleepily bidding you and Jisung with loose hugs before trudging back inside the house with Chan and Minho.Â
Once the doors leading back to the house fully close on the two of you, only then are you engulfed in the same awkward silence again and the two of you, for the third time in the past 6 months, speak up at the same time.Â
âSo umââ ââYeah, a while agoââÂ
This time, the two of you chuckle awkwardly over speaking at the same time again. You then gesture for him to go ahead and speak first as you adjust your sweaterâs placement on your shoulder.Â
Instinctively, Jisung fixes your sweater for you before speaking, causing him to stutter a little. âS-Sorry, umâŠâ He licks his lip awkwardly, retracting his hand as fast as he can and moving a step back. âYeah, I meant to say that I didnât...I didnât mean to look at your heart.âÂ
Suddenly, at such an important moment, youâre speechless and frozen in front of Jisung. Your hands find their way down the hem of your sweater, absentmindedly playing with the loose threads as you shift your weight on the balls of your feet and stutter out your response. âI-I umâŠâÂ
Simultaneously, Jisung takes in a huge intake of breath and continues, âI looked at you because I actually made the song for youâwell, about you but not in a weird way! It can be for you too, that is if you want it!ââ
âJisung?âÂ
âAh, anyway, Iâm losing track! Just, I looked at you because I wanted to know what you thought of it the most in the moment, you knowââ
âJisungâŠâ
âAnd I didnât realize that my eyes were still green and I saw so I looked away as fast as I could, I swearâ!âÂ
âJi.âÂ
âI know you donât want me looking into your heart and stuff because of before. I promise I wonât do it againââÂ
Realizing that heâs not going to stop in his ramblings, you then impulsively take a step towards him and grab him by his arms. âJi, itâs fine.â You shake him gently, effectively stopping the endless flow of thought. âI mean, you already saw it and everything.âÂ
âBut IââÂ
âJust donât lash out or stop talking to me again while I sort it out.â You shrug reassuringly with a sigh, reluctantly sliding your hands off of him and taking a step back again as you see him listen intently to your words. âItâs just pink, anyway, it can still go away like before. Just donât avoid me again this time.âÂ
Though heâs clearly been listening intently, you see his brows furrow and his expression suddenly becomes confused towards the end of your words. âWhat?â He echoes helplessly after you. âNo, I...why would I stop talking to you? That was a long time ago. I wonât do that now, I...âÂ
âThen just donât take my heart or something.â You point out, almost like a question as his reaction confuses you similarly. âAnyway, thatâs not the point, like I said, Iâll sort it ouââ
âDonât.â He cuts you off immediately this time with more conviction, shaking his head and suddenly taking your hand. âDonât sort it out. Donât make it go away or anything.â Â
âWhat? Why?âÂ
Youâre pulled closer again, Jisung mumbling an incantation to show his ecure under his breath. âLook at mine.â He points out, a pink crystal heart floating over to your upturned palm as he holds onto you by your wrist. âIf anything, I should be the one telling you to not take mine on the spot or something.âÂ
âItâs pink.â You muse out loud in surprise, the warmth of his ecure feeling overwhelming as it floats above your hand. âAnd itâs for meâŠ?âÂ
Jisung rolls his eyes at this in disbelief, nodding patiently anyway. âWho else would it be for?â He scoffs gently, making the heart disappear before it could burn your palm. âI donât know since when itâs been like that, maybe itâs been like that for a long time even I donât know Iâve only looked at it while Chan and I were at the studio. All Iâm sure is that suddenly I was writing a song for you and sacrificing half of my ecure count so you donât lose easily in the exam and looking out for you andâjust, this time itâs me whoâs afraid that youâll run away or disappear for a while if you knew.â
âSo donât...sort it out.â He concludes after unknowingly speaking at such a fast rate, heaving belatedly from this. âI like you now, I like you a lot, and Iâm not going to lash out like when we were kids. Take my heart if you want just donât change your feelings for me, please.âÂ
Thereâs a brief pause that follows, the only noise ringing in your ears being the unusually loud beating of your own heart as the two of you freeze in place. Jisung tries waiting as patiently as he visibly can in this silence, puffing air in and out of his lips as he fails at trying to conceal his recurring nervous feelings, while you gaze at anywhere but him because of the heat rising up your neck.Â
âListenâŠâ He speaks up after a while. âIâm sorry, Iââ
Fuck it, you think to yourself before stepping forward, shakily cupping his cheeks, and pressing a kiss to his lips. âDonât say sorry.â You muster up a shy smile in between brief kisses. âYou already know that I like you too.âÂ
bonus epilogue
When you return to the magical realm to the news that Hyunjin wonât be taking his own candidacy exam next year in favor of his own kingdomâs crown, the elders are quick to take your locket and Jisungâs ring to proceed with the final results. Since the decision takes at least 3 days, coupled with the fact that a major complication arose in the 6 months that you were given, Jisung was asked to stay at your castle until the jury could come to a conclusion and crown either one of you.Â
The others would also occasionally come and visit (especially Lia whoâs mostly kept up with your trip through Yeji and Ryujin) but since confessing to Jisung, the boy has been doing the most trying to sneak you away from everyone and your regular royal duties just to spend more time with you.Â
âSo this is what you meant with Sunshine?â You ask in the afternoon before the elders would summon you back to the throne room, the two of you hidden away in your favourite greenhouse garden. Today, Jisung has somehow convinced you to ditch a visit to Chanâs family in favor of just sitting on your greenhouseâs cushioned sofas and listening to him hum his songs until your mentors would eventually come looking for you. âChocolate matcha and your guitar?âÂ
âYeah, just a relaxing rest date with your crush.â Jisung points out next to you, his head snuggled into the crook of your neck as much as the guitar in between the two of you could allow him. On your opposite side, his cuddle rival, the quokka plush toy youâve somehow managed to turn into a life-size pillow today, sits on your lap and occasionally pokes on the end of his guitar. âWhy? Do you want to refill your tea? Iâve been getting Felix to teach me this spell to refill tea, you know. Iâm getting it but chocolate matchaâs kinda hard to replicate.âÂ
You shake your head in disbelief with a chuckle, a stark contrast to how youâre internally flustered over the small comment on your favourite tea flavor. âWho said youâre my crush? Bold of you to even assume, JiâŠâ You pretend to roll your eyes, sinking deeper into the soft cushions behind you.Â
âBaby, youâll be taking those words back when I get crowned tonight.â He pouts, elbowing you gently before shifting to place his guitar on the side. With his hands now free, the prince then resorts to linking his arms with your free one and intertwining your hands together on top of the plush quokka. âIf I win, Iâll make sure to banish this quokka first so youâll be forced to cuddle with only me.âÂ
âTch, Felix won you this quokka. Youâll have to duel with him first if you want this gone.â You argue, sliding the quokka closer to him so its face is adjacent to Jisung. âPlus, it kinda looks like you. If I get crowned and youâll be away doing your own duties back East, I have something of yours.âÂ
âI think you meant that if I win and youâll be staying here doing your own duties, youâll have something of mine.â Jisung huffs pettily. âMaybe we should keep the quokka, after all. You might get lonely if I get busy.âÂ
You shake your head immediately with a chuckle, leaning more of your weight on his side. âOh, no, no, no.â You correct teasingly, making him giggle along against your shoulder. âWho said youâre going to win later?âÂ
âWanna bet?â He raises a brow and smirks, lifting his head briefly to glance over to you.
You roll your eyes at this, leaning forward to meet his lips. âYouâre so competitive, babe. Give it a rest, you know Iâll win anyway.âÂ
a/n: fluff | proposal!au, boyfriend!au | >0.5k words
âHan Jisung, you better wake up now or else.â You cried in distress as your boyfriend decided to not budge at your threat.
Jisung shifted a little before went back to his precious sleep. You had tried many attempts to wake him, from took away his pillow and blanket until pinched his cheeks, but none of it worked.
Now you understood why the boys look defeated in waking your boyfriend.
Curious, in his dry morning voice, Jisung asked, âDid Chan hyung let you in? Again?â He took your silence as a yes.
âGive me five more minutesâŠâ
You let out a defeated sigh as you looked around his room. It was messier than usual, grumbled papers could be seen scattered everywhere. Either it a mess up lyrics he wrote or random notes, you didnât know.
Being the nice girlfriend you were, you picked the grumbled papers one by one. However, instead of mess up lyrics or random notes you thought, you found your name on them.
Did Jisung try to write you a letter?
âIt has been 3 years now since the day we first met the day that Seungmin introduced you to me.â
âYour smile always made my dayâ
âI donât know how to express my feeling toward love you â
You could see how hard he tried to find the right word to be written in the papers. His sincere could be felt from every word and every mistake that he made in those papers. You couldnât help but smile as you read the last unfinished and not grumbled yet paper.
Dear [Name],
It has been 5 years now since the day that Seungmin first introduced you to me and 3 years since weâre dating. The memory is still fresh in my mind and every time I relive the moment, a small smile starts to lay itself out along my lips. This then leads to more memories, all leading me back to you!
I know I should probably be telling you all these deep, heartfelt feelings of mine face to face, over a romantic dinner I have slaved over for the better most part of the afternoon and evening, but here I am ⊠in the written word.
Yes, it is easier. I can delete words and sentences and correct things as I go along before being ready with my final draft of my heartfelt feelings and thoughts. A part of me just felt I would rather get it outright, in your eyes, just once, rather than appear a bumbling mess of nerves when all my thoughts were seemingly locked in my heart and mind; I am sure with you in front of me for such a baring of my soul, that my nerves would have gotten the better of me and I wouldnât have been able to say even one sentence of all the feelings that I feel for you!
I would like to make it up to you however, I know that as of late, I have been extremely busy with work, my after-work sports and fitting in my boys nightsâ out without you, etc. that our time together has been sacrificed for my personal gain. As a result, I believe it would be best if we were no longer boyfriend and girlfriend but rather husband and wifeâŠ
âDid you read all of it?â Startled, you turned around to saw the no longer sleepy Jisung. His eyes widened at the sight of his failed proposal letters in your hands.
âYah! Youâre not supposed to read it before I finish it!â
Jisung tried to snatch it away from you, but you were faster. While holding back your tear, you read the letter once again and said, âI will pretend I havenât read it, IF, you say it out loud to me.â
âRight now? This is not how I imagine the proposal would be.â He whined. He looked at you once again, tried to find any hint if you were joking, but you were dead serious.
He took a deep breath before saying, âI know I have been extremely busy with works and rarely be there for you. But, will you, [Name], willing to keep making memories with me? Will you marry me?â
âOf course itâs a yes, Sungie,â you say thickly without any second thought. âA thousand times yes, I love you so much.â
Jisungâs grin was brighter than the sun as he heard your response. âI love you too,â he murmurs.
warning(s): cold feet, swearing, let me know if i missed something
note:Â iâve been rewatching himym so- lmao,,, barney and robin shouldnt have divorced,,, eeeek
it was a natural thing to freak out an hour before the wedding. but itâs honestly something else when the bride has her shoes on her hands, running off. until you run into someone causing you two to knock down on the floor. you both groan and you shake your head, standing up as you help the girl up. she stands up and you smile apologetically. âhi, iâm so sorry.â you say.
âno, no, no. the bride is always right.â she says and you sigh, smiling. the smile falls off her lips, looking at you. âthis is not good.â she says and you sigh, looking down. âcold feet?â
âi donât know.â you confess. âi just think iâm marrying the wrong man.â
she nods, not saying anything. âthatâs it? youâre not going to say that iâm just freaking out? that iâm crazy?â you ask and she lightly laughs, smiling at you.
âwe donât really know each other.â she says, smiling. âbut letâs face it, you love him. you didnât run off when i didnât say anything. you stayed here, asking me if iâm not going to stop you. deep down, youâre looking for a sign to tell you that you should just go and marry him.â she says and you look at her. âclose your eyes, take three deep breaths. it can change a lot.â
she smiles, walking off and you nod, smiling back at her. you sigh, closing your eyes.
first breath.
everyone knows itâs in minhoâs nature to lie. he never really opened up that muchâif he isnât able to turn the tables around, he lies. he wasnât there from the very start. he could make a big gesture for you but itâs the smallest things that you want him to do which he almost never does.
second breath.
hyunjin is the one who always comes through. he found the locket you have buried years ago that you lost. tracked down ex-girlfriends in hopes that they have it. he gave it to minho, saying that minho shouldnât say that it was hyunjin who found it. minho did it without blinking. hyunjin was the one who was always there for youâthe one who always loved you.
third breath.
you never wanted to get married but when minho asked, you never hesitated to say yes.
you open your eyes, feeling yourself more calm. you turn, eyes widening lightly as you see minho on the side with a bunch of papers. âminho,â you mumble and minho looks at you.
âhi.â he says. âi, um, been looking all over for you.â
you nod, sighing. âwell, here i am.â
minho nods, âwhat you doing?â he asks but he knows what you were going to do. he could see it. he always knew when youâre at the most vulnerable state. heels on your hands, tear stains on your cheeks, panting lightly.
âjust, um,â you pointed at the stage where the instruments and equipments of the band are as you look down. âtalking to someone in the band about some.. band stuff.â you lied, looking up as you smiled at him.
minho nods, not forcing you to tell him the truth.
âwhatâs that?â you ask, gesturing to the bunch of paper heâs holding.
âmy wedding vows. i couldnât get it quite right, so..â he says, gesturing at the paper as he toses it lightly to the side. âum, i know itâs bad luck to see the bride before the wedding, but i need to talk to you.â
âyeah? what is it?â you ask.
minho takes in a deep breath, sighing it out as he nods to encourage himself. âi know i have been a pain in the ass. we went through a rough path, but we were great, too and i hope we can stil be great together.â minho says. he definitely knows. âand i think, i know why we almost didnât make it. i know i barely open up and itâs hard for you.
âso, through writing a lot of drafts, i realized there is only one vow i should make to you to let you know that i am ready to fully commit to you, y/n.â minho says and you look at him. ây/n, from this day forward, i vow to you that i will never lie to you ever again. because thatâs whatâs important and.. you never lied to me. i will try to be the best man that you deserve to have,â
you fiddle with your fingers, pushing your lips into a thin line as you look at him.
minho lets out a breath, looking at you with a small smile. âiâll see you at the ceremony.â he says as he turns around to walk to his room but he stops, turning back to you. âalso, hyunjin found the locket. so, you should thank him.â
minho turns around, walking.
âwait, minho.â you call as you walk to him and he turns around. your hand cups his cheek as your hand that holds your heels goes around his shoulders and you press your lips against his. minho kisses back, putting his hand on your hip as he makes you feel the burning passion of love that he feels for you.
you pull away, minho resting his forehead against yours as he doesnât open his eyes. he fully pulls you to him, wrapping his arms around your waist as he rests his chin on your shoulder. you lean your cheek against his as you wrap your own arms around his shoulders.
now, youâre sure itâs minho. itâs minho from the beginning, it will be minho until the end.