Is the independent girlboss dead? Maybe she never existed to begin with. The release of Lindy Westās latest cringeworthy memoir, Adult Brace
The release of Lindy Westās latest cringeworthy memoir,Ā Adult Bracesāabout how her husband out-woked her into becoming the side chick in her own marriageāhas prompted an intra-leftist firing squad about who bears responsibility for the girlbossās dimming appeal to younger women. The AtlanticĀ published anĀ essayĀ by Helen Lewis declaring the āDeath of Millennial Feminism,ā while inĀ SlateĀ Jill FilipovicĀ defendedĀ the girlboss ideal against what she calls an āabsolutely enormous antifeminist backlash within which we are all living.ā They both take for granted, however, that the girlboss has declined from her cultural primacy. That may be so, but sheās taken no comparable hammering in the world of public policy. Whether the Millennial image of the girlboss, with its shrill first-person confessional style, is fading into cheugy-ness with the inevitable generational pendulum swing, the cornerstone of her appeal, āindependenceā from men and family, has never been so popular. On Redditās infamous r/relationships subreddit, half of all advice given amounts to āleave,ā up from 30 percent in 2010 and still climbing. Nearly half of Gen ZĀ chooseĀ financial independence over romance when surveyed, and nearly three times as many Americans say having a career they enjoy is more important than getting married or having children. In a 2023Ā submissionĀ to theĀ New York Timesās execrable āModern Loveā series, divorcĆ©e Maggie Smith exhorts women āneverā to be financially dependent on a man.
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The image of the working woman, the girlboss, remains theĀ sine qua nonĀ of independence. After all, she pays her own bills using money she earned herself, or so it seems. But dig into the details and one learns she is propped up from every angle by laws, taxpayer dollars, and the ability to externalize the costs of her lifestyle onto others. In other words, the girlboss is often as much a dependent as Betty Draper, but her dependence is less honest, laundered through public policy. President Barack Obama ran an infamous 2012 campaign ad, mocked by conservatives, about the āLife of Julia,ā a woman dependent on government at every turn. That model could be renamed for Millennial girlbosses as the āLife of Jessicaā: a cycle of dependence on institutions and structures that allegedly liberate women from the patriarchal boot but instead merely redistribute and conceal their dependence. Letās start with the outsourcing of domestic labor that became normative by the end of the 1970s. Someone has to cook, clean, and look after the children. Some of the slack continues to be picked up by women working the ādouble shift,ā a full-time job outside the home while being the primary homemaker (an arrangement maligned by feminists as yet another unfair burden placed on women by the patriarchy, though it is more realistically a result of womenās higher standards for domestic order). But even the women āhaving it allā often cannot keep up with the double burden. Thus women leaving the home en masse created a demand for a servant class at rates affordable to the median-wage householdāa demand met by lax immigration policies. In major cities such as New York and Los Angeles, up to half the nannies on the books are immigrants, and the real number is likely higher, with many skirting labor laws. The profile of other domestic task-replacers looks similar, with cheap delivery services such as DoorDash and Grubhub, staples for two-income households too harried to cook dinner, incentivizing an enormous black market thatĀ rentsĀ verified accounts to illegal immigrants.
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Then there are the girlboss jobs themselves. While millions of women create real value in the economy and deserve their paychecks, itās impossible not to notice the wild proliferation of āemail jobsā and administrative compliance positions that donāt add to the company bottom line (David Graeber famously called them ābullshit jobsā in his bestsellingĀ bookĀ of the same title), jobs disproportionately filled by the fairer sex. In 1991, reforms to the Civil Rights Act ensured that lawsuits over (often spurious) sexual harassment claims in the workplaceĀ becameĀ a major cash cow for litigants. Companies responded by bending the knee to the most easily offended, kicking off the era of āpolitical correctnessā and spawning an enormous industry that trains employees not to harass one another. These reforms also raised the stakes for employers to prove they were not discriminating on the basis of sex or race in their hiring and promotion practices,Ā pushingĀ them well beyond meritocracy into de facto affirmative action for women and minorities. Even more pernicious is the proliferation of Soviet commissar-style jobs, both in the nonprofit and for-profit sectors, that exist primarily to enforce political agendas rather than to produce value. In the U.S., the number of human resources jobs, three-quarters of which are filled byĀ women, has exploded, roughly doubling from 2014 to 2024. Itās unlikely that managing a payroll has become commensurately burdensome in the past ten years; those additional roles exist to enforce diversity laws. The entire DEI complex is a giant subsidy for make-work positions staffed by women and racial minorities.
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Earlier in the life of the girlboss resides an even more obvious source of her dependency: universities. Higher education is disproportionately attended and staffed by women. It is also funded in large part by the taxpayer, with an output that adds to cultural revolution more than to the wealth of nations. Female students earn just under 60 percent of bachelorās degrees, and similar proportions of masterās and PhDs. Given that women more often choose lower-paid majors such as gender studies and communications, as opposed to structural engineering and computer science, itās little surprise that the student debt crisis is itself a disproportionately female phenomenon. Women hold two-thirds of outstanding student debt, nearly all of which has been financed by the federal government. Unless serious policy changes are made to defuse this debt bomb, the high default rates will ultimately fall on the taxpayer, through whom the government already owns 93 percent of student loans.
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On the other side of the expense ledger are those benefits society loses when women choose en masse to work in the office. The quality of teaching, traditionally a feminine profession at least until the college level, has collapsed along a timeline thatĀ suggestsĀ that diverting talented women into higher-paid careers was the cause. Letās posit for the sake of argument that itās better for those ambitious and intelligent women to be lawyers instead of shaping the future minds of both sexes in the classroom. Is it better for society as a whole that teaching has been relegated to a low-scoring backup plan, that still remains predominately female? Volunteering and philanthropy, on the other hand, once the province of Gilded Age heiresses and women with grown-up children, have been professionalized, through correspondingly multiplying female-staffed NGOs. In short, the feminine impulse toward empathy that used to be predominantly applied to solve problems in oneās community has been transformed into permanent activism as a career. Instead of the Daughters of the American Revolution raising town statues, we have women whose career advancement depends on tearing them down.
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For better or worse, there is no āretvrnā to the past, and Iām certainly not suggesting we try to resurrect traditionalism by force of law. I think the more likely path for social evolution will involve more work-from-homeĀ flexibility, more homeschooling, and more start-up communities. But letās be clear: The status quo is maintained by a network of laws and policies that push women out of the home and into the workforce. Women who would prefer to work part-time or not at all while their children are youngāstill the substantialĀ majorityāmust make heavy sacrifices to do so, sacrifices that were unnecessary forty or fifty years ago. The āchoiceā touted even by conservative variants of feminism is an illusion. In reality, the girlboss model is incentivized to the exclusion of more traditional choices, such as relying on a husbandās single income, which are punished by our tax code, our antidiscrimination laws, our immigration policy, and our cultureās ethos. Meanwhile, the very real benefits of the traditional family model are treated as taboo subjects; and the traditional family itself is becoming a luxury good. The bemoaned ātwo-income trapā didnāt emerge ex nihilo, but resulted from decades of thumbs rigging the scales.











