#iksw

I Kissed Shara Wheeler (2022) / Red, White & Royal Blue (2019)

Alex repressed his sexuality for so long because it was easier than dealing with it, but when he realized he was bisexual, there was no drama, no internalized homophobia from his side, just some nervousness over coming out and people’ (specially his family’s) reactions. He never feels bad about being bisexual, just a little confused in how come he didn’t figure it out earlier. He has no problem saying it outloud and calling himself bisexual out loud, despite having grown up in Austin in the early 2000s.

Henry, despite having grown up as a royal in the public eye and suffering from homophobia since his father died, he never hates being gay. Never repressed it, never hated himself because of it. There was just a constant acceptance and even enjoyment from his part, and he only hated not being able to be gay in peace. He actually liked being gay, there was no internalized, even though it would have been understandable.

No internalized homophobia from August. Her bisexuality is honestly barely relevant to her. She already knows, her mom knows, she’s moved on.

Jane, despite having grown up in the 60s, didn’t suffer from internalized homophobia as a teen. She was scared of what her family would think, but not because of what she thought about being a lesbian, because she didn’t think it was bad, she has known for a long time as was pretty okay with it. She immediately got into the gay scene as never thought even once that her being a lesbian was a bad thing.

Chloe very obviously doesn’t suffer internalized homophobia, and even though she feels sympathetic towards Rory, etc, she just doesn’t get it. She’s always been fine with it.

Shara is the cmq mc who probably suffered the most internalized homophobia,but hers is similar to Alex’s. She repressed, because she didn’t want to deal with it, didn’t know what to do with it, but when she couldn’t run away anymore, she embraced it. That’s not internalized homophobia. Mine hits even after I’ve embraced being gay. Hers didn’t. After years of repression when she realized and accepts she’s a lesbian (which takes her like one or two days), she immediately comes out to Rory, comes out on ig to everyone, flirts with Chloe, and during the graduation holds a sign that says “blessed are the fruits”. She’s fine with everyone knowing, she cared about her reputation before, and what they thought of her, but not necessarily about them knowing she’s a lesbian because she thought of it as something bad. She’s fine kissing Chloe in public and everyone knowing they’re dating post-graduation.

Theo and Kit also have no repression or shame whatsoever.

But even side characters. Nora? No angst, just neutral. Niko, Wes, etc? No angst, just neutral. Even Rory. Rory repressed a lot, but the moment he realized, he immediately came out to Shara and lowkey Chloe too. That’s not internalized homophobia. If he had it, it left immediately. Smith doesn’t seem to be suffering from it much either. He hides nail polish and stuff from his family but again, probably just a caution, and he’s fine among his friends and everyone else. Even Georgia, who is afraid of how her family will take it but talks loudly about how they’re gay so obviously they can’t do math.