#ifellbecausegravity

Writer: @ecto-american

“It’s time to see if Rye’s gonna get their ass kicked by a veteran phighter or kick ass so hard that they gotta call their own medic line,” Nick mused. “Whelp! We’ll see! It’s time for @going-dead versus @ifellbecausegravity!”

Gravity was already suited up for battle, googly eyes at the ready. Rye had their fist up, prepared for anything with a hot cup of coffee in the other. 

“You don’t even know! I’m ready to kick my own butt!” Gravity stated boldly. 

“No worries, I’ll just kick it for you!” Rye assured her with a large grin. 

Gravity lunged forward and slapped some googly eyes on Rye’s coffee cup. Their cup now had an adorably goofy appearance now. 

“Aww,” Rye cooed over the big dumb wiggle eyes. 

“Yeet!” Gravity shrieked. She grabbed Rye by the arm, attempting to fling them out of Denny’s. 

But Rye was an EMT. They were used to this yeet or be yeeted world. They instead held tight onto her hand, pouring coffee onto it to make her let go. Of course, she did to yelp in pain over the hot beverage. This allowed Rye to instead yeet her out of the arena. 

“Finally,” Tucker said, leaning forward in his seat with his hands on his knees.  It had taken forever for the Denny’s employees to repave the ring over the top of the ballpit.  The chalk circle drawn on it was now even more lopsided than before.  

Tali cleared her throat and began the announcements.

“From the Acropolis of Athens, a phighter who’s risen out of obscurity: Ifellbecausegravity!”

“GRA-VI-TY! GRA-VI-TY!”  The audience chanted.

“And her opponent, a phighter who puts the ‘vore’ in ‘Carnivorous Outskirts’: Lexosaurus!”

The crowd shifted from the chant to aggressively dabbing.  Some ghosts even had pictures of Danny’s face on sticks that they waved in the air.  Tucker snapped a few more photos as Danny groaned.

“PHIGHT!”

Ifellbecausegravity fell into a crouch, arms outstreched.  

“COME AT ME, BRO!”

“Uh huh, are you sure about that?”  Lexx asked while holding her Danno on a stick like a baseball bat.

“I have nothing left to lose,” Ifellbecausegravity said somberly.

“Alright then, I gotchu bro.”

Lexx charged at her, stick bared, as Ifellbecause gravity unleashed her other weapon.

“LASJDLFKIOVADFASKDJ;F’LJWELRLASNLSAN;ASJL!!!”

“Whoa,” Tucker said.  “Was that a verbal keysmash?”

Danny nodded.

“Huh.  Is that a ghost power?  You think you can learn how to do that?”

“Quiet Tuck, I’m trying to watch.”

Luckily, Tucker turned back to the fight just in time to watch Lexx push through the keysmash and yeet Ifellbecausegravity out of the ring.  Tucker thought she’d go flying into the void of the ghost zone, but she smacked into an invisible barrier around the arena.

“Oof,” he said as she slowly peeled back off the barrier and plummeted to the ground.

“Well, her name is Ifellbecausegravity,” Danny said with a snicker.

“Okay, that’s a decent pun, I’ll give you that one.”  Tali smiled and blew her kazoo.