*Has a feeling*
What was that. What. What was that.
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*Has a feeling*
What was that. What. What was that.

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i hate giving my friends the ego boost of trying to help me. you don't deserve that you're the reason i'm mad
рдкрд╢реНрдЪрд┐рдореА рд╕рд┐рдВрд╣рднреВрдо рдХреЗ рд╕рд╛рд░рдВрдбрд╛ рдореЗрдВ рдЖрдИрдИрдбреА рдХрд╛ рд╢рд┐рдХрд╛рд░ рдмрдирд╛ рджрдВрддреИрд▓, рдЖрда рджрд┐рди рдХреА рдЬрдВрдЧ рд╣рд╛рд░рдХрд░ рддреЛрдбрд╝рд╛ рджрдо
рдЪрд╛рдИрдмрд╛рд╕рд╛ : рдкрд╢реНрдЪрд┐рдореА рд╕рд┐рдВрд╣рднреВрдо рдХреЗ рдШрдиреЗ рд╕рд╛рд░рдВрдбрд╛ рдЬрдВрдЧрд▓ рдореЗрдВ рдЖрдИрдИрдбреА рд╡рд┐рд╕реНрдлреЛрдЯ рдореЗрдВ рдШрд╛рдпрд▓ рд╣реБрдП рджрдВрддреИрд▓ рд╣рд╛рдереА рдХреА рдЧреБрд░реБрд╡рд╛рд░ рджреЗрд░ рд╢рд╛рдо рдореМрдд рд╣реЛ рдЧрдИред рдкрд┐рдЫрд▓реЗ рдХрдИ рджрд┐рдиреЛрдВ рд╕реЗ рд╡рди рд╡рд┐рднрд╛рдЧ рдФрд░ рдкрд╢реБ рдЪрд┐рдХрд┐рддреНрд╕рдХреЛрдВ рдХреА рдЯреАрдо рд▓рдЧрд╛рддрд╛рд░ рдЙрд╕рдХрд╛ рдЗрд▓рд╛рдЬ рдХрд░ рд░рд╣реА рдереА, рд▓реЗрдХрд┐рди рдЧрдВрднреАрд░ рдЪреЛрдЯ рдФрд░ рдмрдврд╝рддреЗ рд╕рдВрдХреНрд░рдордг рдХреЗ рдХрд╛рд░рдг рдЙрд╕реЗ рдмрдЪрд╛рдпрд╛ рдирд╣реАрдВ рдЬрд╛ рд╕рдХрд╛ред рд╣рд╛рдереА рдХреА рдореМрдд рд╕реЗ рд╡рди рд╡рд┐рднрд╛рдЧ рдХреЗ рдЕрдзрд┐рдХрд╛рд░рд┐рдпреЛрдВ рдХреЗ рд╕рд╛рде-рд╕рд╛рде рд╡рдиреНрдпрдЬреАрд╡ рдкреНрд░реЗрдорд┐рдпреЛрдВ рдореЗрдВ рднреА рд╢реЛрдХ рд╣реИред рдЬрд╛рдирдХрд╛рд░реА рдХреЗ рдореБрддрд╛рдмрд┐рдХ, 4 рдордИ рдХреЛ рд╕рд╛рд░рдВрдбрд╛ рдХреЗ рдХреЛрд▓рдмреЛрдВрдЧрд╛ рдХреНрд╖реЗрддреНрд░тАж
I don't understand humans.
"Are you sensitive?"
"No, only when I have episodes"
"Okay what triggers that"
"Things making me upset"
Is that not being sensitive. Or..?
When you're honest as a Schizoid and get told your lack of empathy/emotion towards someone/something is "crazy"
Thanks. Its called a SYMPTOM.

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Having SzPD and BPD is torture because I desperately crave a relationship, but also don't want one and get extremely uncomfortable when the opportunity is brought up, but still crave a relationship. Can I like, make up my mind?
Every relationship I've been in has ended within about 5 minutes, because all this attention they give me is..ew.
I once had a long distance relationship and that was possibly the best and worse thing ever, person didn't understand that I'm basically allergic to constantly talking but still wanted to be reminded they exist whatsoever, like I get its probably a lot to ask of someone but thats the issue.
And I only get along with other cluster A or cluster B people too, which makes it HARDER. Because people assume I'm some sorta murderous maniac (well, in my head maybe) BUT I'M NOT!
Last partner I had...semi unwillingly, was the definition of co dependant and it actually drove me insane, no I CAN'T be there every second of the day, I CAN'T give you constant reassurance that I'm not cheating on you with some imaginary person, they just wouldn't leave me the fuck alone until I blew up on them and now they hate me soooo...yeah. you get it, right?
Me at any minor inconvenience: