#i cant write

The drive home was long, the 20 hours of road time leaving you with your thoughts. 

Sometimes that was a good thing. Now? Not so much.

You left home because of your boyfriend, now ex-boyfriend. He had claimed he wanted to start a family together, buy a house. You thought he was yours forever. Of course, last week you came home to him and your "best friend" in bed together, apparently they'd been together behind your back for months.

So here you were.

You had no one, and you made the decision to go home after being away for six years, to leave the place that had caused you such pain.

Coming home was the hardest decision you've had to make but in your heart you know it was the right one.

You’re on your way home, where your dad will be waiting for you to jump out of the car and melt in his arms.

And that’s what happens, his arms were around you the moment you were on your feet.

“I’ve missed you so much, sweetheart,” your dad says softly while stroking your hair.

Tears are streaming down your face when you pull out of the hug. You've missed your dad so much. He’d been your rock your whole life, since your mom wasn’t around he had to be.

Your mom; you wish you had known her. 

She left when you were five, the only memory you have of her was on your fifth birthday when she gave you the heart necklace you still wear.

Thinking about her only makes you cry harder.

Then the sound of your name being called by a familiar voice pulled you out of the soft moment with your dad. When you turn your head you see Joel Miller, your dad's best friend and neighbor since you moved here when you were younger.

“Oh my goodness, hi Mr. Miller” you beam, wiping the tears from your eyes. He was such a kind person, it was no wonder him and your dad quickly became friends.

“Hi, honeybee,” Joel always did have the sweetest nicknames for you. You realize that you missed his silliness when he pulls you into a bear hug and lifts you a foot off the ground.

“Mr. Miller, put me down!!” You squealed, grabbing onto his shoulders tightly so you don't accidentally fall. That would be a great way to start your first day home. 

When he finally puts you down you smile at each other, both of you a little out of breath. 

You finally have a moment to take in your surroundings and notice the barbecue smell and quiet music coming from your backyard, you look to your dad.

“Daddy, please tell me you are not throwing a welcome home party,” Your dad shrugs looking around sheepishly, you giggle at his flustered look and pull him into another tight hug, “That's so kind, thank you dad.”

After you take your stuff upstairs to your room you change into something fit for a party. On your way to the back yard you glance around at how everything is exactly as it was when you left, the same photos on the walls, the couch still in the same place, same magnets and childhood art hanging on the fridge.

“There she is,” one of your neighbors shouted, everyone's head suddenly turned and you flushed at the attention. Smiling awkwardly with a small wave you jog over to your dad.

“Dad!! The whole neighborhood is here,” you whisper yelled at him, trying not to make a scene. 

“They all missed you bein’ around, we all wanted to welcome you back properly,” the smile your dad gives as he says this makes you melt and it's impossible to be upset at him. 

"Now go mingle," he rubs your shoulder soothingly when you sigh but do as he asked.

-

The food and company of the evening was a great welcome back home but you're getting tired, the music and people and smells are all too much at once so you take a break inside claiming that you need to use the bathroom.

You're leaning against the kitchen counter behind you and letting ice water slide down your throat. It's a bit sore from constant catching up over the past hour, cold water is exactly what you needed and you close your eyes to savor the feeling for a few seconds.

You hear the door slide open and turn around setting your glass on the counter that's now in front of you, Joel walks in and you let out a breath you didn't know you were holding at the sight of him.

“Thought you were usin’ the bathroom,” Joel quirks a single brow at you while he opens the fridge for a cold beer. He cracks it open and comes to lean on the counter of the warm kitchen next to you.

Your cheeks pink slightly, the warmth in your face confuses you but you assume it's just the heat of the house.

"Well..you know..-" you struggle to come up with the words to describe your needed break, thankfully Joel cuts you off with a chuckle. "I get it, long trip n’then bein’ the main event of a welcome home party ain't easy.”

You were left sort of speechless, sure it makes sense when he says it.

“Right…yeah,” you whisper mostly to yourself in response.

The silence between you is comforting and welcome, it goes on for all of 3 minutes until Joel clears his throat.

“Well, I better get back out there,” he walks slowly across the creaking old wood floor to the back door, pauses, and turns slightly. “Don't stay in here too long or your dad'll come lookin’.”

You know he's right, but you don't move from your spot until you hear shouting from outside.

“JUMP, JUMP, JUMP,” the younger people are all gathered around the pool chanting for the first person to jump in. 

To your surprise when you glance over to the chanting it's Joel who is about to jump in the pool first, you make eye contact - both smiling widely - just as he moves to jump into the pool. Joel manages to make a splash so large most of the party got hit with at least one droplet.

Once he's come back to the surface and moves his dripping curls from his forehead, he's immediately yelling for you to join him in the pool.

“C'mon doll, jump in!” Joel's shout makes everyone around the pool, and now in the pool, turn to look at you and join in his begging.

“Fine!!” You groan a little but give in anyway and begin removing your outfit to reveal the swimsuit you chose before the party. Your feet hit the hot ground hard and you sprint to the pool.

The rest of the night is spent laughing and drinking with old friends and neighbors.

“Thank you for comin’, and I will be tryin’ that recipe soon,” your dad chuckles, escorting the last person through the side gate. 

He sighs when he sees Joel already picking up leftover trays of food and trash that fell to the ground.

“Don't say a word, I'm helpin’, y'all don't need to do all this cleanin’ yourself,” his words are final so dad doesn't fight it.

When the backyard is cleaned up and food is packed away in the fridge and in containers for Joel to take home, you yawn, “Well, thank you so much daddy, this was such a fun night.”

“You're so welcome, Flower,” his hug is tight and he leaves a kiss on your head, “You get some sleep, I'll make you breakfast in the morning.”

“Night, Mr. Miller,” your eyes meet and you're walking towards the stairs to your room.

“Night, Sugar,” his drawl follows you up the stairs with the promise of a good night's sleep.

-

When Joel gets home that night after sharing a final beer with your dad, his mind wanders to you. 

An image of you popping into his mind, you in that swimsuit, wet hair clinging.

It was apparent that you were no longer that girl you were all those years ago, and that he no longer saw you in that way. You were a woman, and you were beautiful. A beautiful woman that Joel should not be thinking about, at least not like this.

You were a woman yes, but a woman who was off limits to him. I mean he practically watched you grow up, he was your dads best friend.

Now here he was, thinking about his buddy’s daughter like a creep. Fuck me, he thought. What is wrong with me?

-

His lips on yours were welcome and soft in the best way, his hands on your cheeks pulling you closer than ever, his body holding yours between him and the wall of the pool.

Him. Joel Miller. Hard and soft beneath your fingers. His starved kisses.

Starved kisses trailing across your throat, hickies being left in their place. 

“Mr. Miller…” a moan slips out just as your eyes open, and suddenly you're left alone in a cold bedroom, Joel Miller nowhere in sight.

You sit up, breathlessly taking in your surroundings. Confusion fills you.

A dream about Joel?

A sex dream about Joel.

You slip out of bed and the hard floor is cold on your bare feet for the five steps to your bathroom, and you stare at yourself for a moment in the mirror above the vanity.

Why am I having a sex dream about Joel fucking Miller?

Yawning, you attempt to file that question away for tomorrow while you crawl back into your warm bed. 

The same bed where I had a sex dream about Joel Miller.

Your brain won't shut up about him, why are you suddenly thinking about him like that? Joel Miller is your dad's best friend, a man who you've known for years…you’ve never thought of him that way. 

Sure, Joel is an attractive man but you’d never noticed until now, until this dream. Yet, here you are, on your back staring at your ceiling with only him on your mind. 

Maybe it's a fluke, you think. I'm just upset about my ex, I don't really feel that way about Joel…

Eventually sleep takes you again, the sleep being dreamless this time.

-

The smell of the large breakfast your dad prepared is what woke you this morning, vastly different from what woke you in the middle of the night.

“Oh my goodness, dad!!” You exclaim at the spread of breakfast on the dining room table. “We can't even eat this much food.”

“Well that's alright, darlin’, I invited Joel to join us.” You freeze. “I hope that's alright?”

Of course that's alright, or, it should be alright but you're haunted by your dream…the things he did to you, the way he touched you. 

He'll take one look at you and know what you've been thinking about him and he'll hate you. 

For a valid reason too. He wouldn't want some girl 20 years younger than him to think of him this way, especially you.

“Yeah, of course that's alright,” you smile, hoping he can't see through your facade.

A knock sounds on the back door and Joel walks through, reminding you of the moment last night when you talked in the kitchen. In that moment there was no sign that he saw you as a kid; it was two adults having a conversation.

“Mornin’, honeybee,” Joel's low voice rings through you in a way it never has before, the way his accent wraps around his words and delivers them to your wanting ears. It's like a dream.

A dream.

Your face is burning bright when you reply.

“Morning, Mr. Miller!!” He chuckles, at what? You don't know but it certainly doesn't help the burn in your face.

Breakfast goes by as normal as possible, though you were quieter than expected, lost in your thoughts.

You're washing the breakfast dishes and staring out the window in front of you into the backyard. The pool seemed to be staring back at you, flashes of your dream hitting you.

Your back against the pool wall. Joel's warm and firm body pressing against you.

Fireworks go off in your lower stomach at the thought. 

“Need some help?” His low voice is right behind you, he's close enough that you can feel how warm he is.

You spin, startled and staring. 

“Uh, yeah, sorry.” You embarrassingly stutter out while trying to reorient yourself. “Help would be great, thanks.”

You move a little to the right to make room for him at your side, continuing to scrub the dish. 

As he starts on his own dish your eyes travel to his forearms and down to his hands. Something you'd never done before, never noticed how strong they were…the muscles moving as he scrubs at the plate.

You realize you’re staring when you drop the soapy dish into the sink, it makes you and Joel jump.

Thankfully Joel ignores it and begins speaking, though what he says makes you wish the plate had broken.

“So, your dad, he told me a little about what brought you home,” he pauses attempting to gauge your reaction, you nod. “That guy, he's an ass, don't deserve you anyway.”

You laugh sadly, “That's what dad said,” You know it's true, but you can't help but feel like maybe you could have done something to change what happened. “Doesn't feel true.”

“Ah, honey.” He sets his current dish down, dries his hand, and gently grabs your shoulder to turn you towards him. “Can't let ‘im get to you, boys treatin’ women like that nowadays,” he shakes his head. “It ain't right, you deserve so much better.”

You know that if Joel knew what his words were doing to you, he wouldn’t be saying them, but you let yourself imagine that when he says these things he means for them to hit your ears in the way that ignites you.

“Yeah?” You ask , looking up - because yes you have you look up - into his eyes. His soft, honey brown eyes that are looking at you like you're the only thing on earth.

He smiles, that smile he's smiled as long as you've known him and yet, when you see it this time it melts you into a puddle at his feet.

“Of course,” And he says it like it's the easiest thing in the world for him to say.

-

He saw you staring the other day, of course he did. Your eyes traced his soapy hands and forearms in a way that could be mistaken as lustful. But no. That’s not possible.

Right?

And the way you looked up at him. Why did you look at him like that?

Your eyes stared straight into his soul and he worried you’d see it. The ever growing hunger for you; he tried to deny it, but seeing you only worsened his desire. 

You must have noticed. Why else would you avoid him the way you have? Days have passed since Joel last saw you, the last was when he saw you ducking around multiple people at the farmers market to get away from him. He knew then that he had messed up.

Yet, he was doing it again, thinking about you. Someone he could never have even if… no.

Idiot. 

Joel doesn’t know how long he spends thinking of you, but he knows he spends just as long criticizing himself for having a single indecent thought about you.

When your dad asks Joel to watch over you while he’s in the office, he should say no. 

He should say no, but he can’t, what would be his excuse? 

“Sorry, but your daughter is invading my every thought and if I’m around her I may not be able to keep myself composed.”? No, he couldn’t say that to someone, much less his best friend.

Still, Joel can’t help but think. What if?

-

A few days later, your dad is at work, which leaves you home alone.

The pool called your name for hours until you finally changed into your swimsuit and sat with your feet hanging over the edge.

Days went by without you having to see Joel at all, surprisingly. Not that you don't want to see him, but when you see him your mind wanders.

It wanders off to places it never should've been in the first place.

Of course sitting by the same pool you've literally dreamt Joel would kiss you in isn't helping. 

All you can think of is his hands on you, his lips trailing, his eyes.

God those eyes.

Your name is being called.

“Hey, honey” Its him, of fucking course, its him.

You whip your head around, face heating in a way that cannot be blamed on the hot sun. Really it was the fault of your wandering eyes, Joel was in swim shorts and nothing else. 

No t-shirt. His hard chest and soft tummy caused that spark in your core to ignite again.

“Hey,” You give a sweet smile hoping he doesn't notice your changed behavior. He did.

“Your, uh, dad mentioned you were home alone,” he pauses, hesitant, “Thought y’might like some company.”

His neck and shoulders flex with his speech, your breath is shallow.

“Right,” you curse internally, because fuck, you and Joel near the pool together? When he looks like that…

Joel sits two feet away from you, not far enough, you can smell his cologne. It drives you insane.

Immediately you're slipping into the pool, all the way down until your head is under water. 

You stay there until you absolutely have to come up for air.

Joel speaks again once you've swiped the water from your face.

“You been avoidin’ me?” His words are like ice in your veins, your heart stalls and suddenly the water is too wet and cold.

“What?” You ask, unmoving, worried that if you do he'll be able to tell. Be able to see the things you wish he would do to you.

He slips into the water behind you, all the way down like you did. It leaves you a few seconds to try and collect your thoughts, to no avail.

“Look at me,” his tone is soft but his words are demanding, and you do as he's asked.

You turn, slowly, carefully. You have no idea what he's about to say, or do. But truthfully, you know what you want him to do. You want to recreate your dream, right here, right now. You want him.

But you can't have him.

“Im not-” You try to defend yourself, Joel cuts you off.

He's standing in the water, a little farther from you than before. Wet, curls clinging to his forehead, droplets of water dripping down his shoulders.

“S’ok, I'm only askin’ cause I don't want you t’be uncomfortable, honey,” he starts, voice so soft and genuine. “Did I do somethin’ to make you avoid me?”

Your heart nearly breaks in half at his question, it's not his fault you're having these inappropriate thoughts and feelings about him. 

“No, no, I'm…I'm sorry Joel,” your voice is small when you respond, not really sure what to say, how to explain what's been going on with you without making him uncomfortable.

He steps closer to you, that heat in your stomach making any explanation fall short of reaching his expectant ears.

“Hey,” the way he speaks to you is so kind, “What's goin’ on?”

Your eyes are anywhere but his, unfortunately that means you make eye contact with his collarbones, his tense shoulders, the wide expanse of his tan chest…

It clicks for him, obviously you don't notice, but he sees the way you're looking at his body. It's as if a light bulb is finally turning that last centimeter and illuminating everything around it, the avoidance wasn't about you being uncomfortable. 

He saw that clearly in the way you looked at him just then. He could see the way your pupils dilated, the way your breathing picked up.

His ego swelled and burned in his veins.

You want him. You want him the same as he wants you and it makes him crazy with need.

A smile dances across his face as he brings a careful hand up to move a strand of hair from your cheek and gently pulls your chin up to look at him.

“Thought I told you to look at me,” there's something in his voice this time, something that makes your whole body burn with want.

He’s testing you, teasing, checking on you. Joel is somehow making you lose your mind with need while also making sure you’re present and okay with the way he’s touching you. The way he’s talking to you.

Joel’s low voice slid across your skin, making you feel as though you were floating on clouds.

You were utterly speechless, he was so close, and so right. And he was touching you, his big hand that was soft and rough at the same time, on your chin. His gentle force makes you hold eye contact with him.

You were damn near panting at this point, the want apparent in your entirety. Your eyes were never more dilated than now. Your skin was warm and your body subconsciously inched closer to him.

Joel's eyes stayed trained on yours while his hand slipped down from your chin, slow, you shivered. The way his hand softly caressed the skin of your throat had your eyes fluttering.

He was leaning in slower than you even thought possible, close enough now that you can feel his even breath battling your uneven breath for the space between your lips.

A phone rings.

Your phone. Ringing by the edge of the pool, your dad's ringtone suddenly filling the air around you and Joel.

The last thing you wanted was to move away from this moment, but you broke the tension and moved to answer the phone.

“Hey, dad!” you're still catching your breath when you pick up. “What do you need?”

“Everything alright over there? You sound out of breath,” he was genuinely concerned, and it brought you back to reality.

Here you were, lips centimeters away from Joel's, Joel Miller your dad's best friend. How did you get here?

“Yeah, sorry dad, I'm in the pool,” you tried to keep your voice as even as possible. Joel made that difficult as he came up behind you, way closer than he should have been.

He was so close, listening while you talked to your dad about what would be for dinner. His hand came up to your shoulder and he traced his fingers along the open skin, you shut your eyes tight to focus on the call though it barely worked.

“Alright, that's all sweetheart, I'll see you in a minute,” as soon as your dad ended the call your head fell back against Joel's chest and you let out a quiet breathless moan.

-

“Joel! I didn't know you were here, stay for dinner?” You groan internally, again it's not that you don't want to be around Joel. You're just tired of pretending you don't want to jump him right there in the middle of your kitchen.

Joel makes eye contact with you, smirks subtly enough your dad doesn't catch it.

“Yeah, I'd love to stay,” because of course he'd love to stay, he knows what you want now, he's teasing you.

-

Joel wants you bad, and now he knows you feel the same way. He knows it’s wrong, but it doesn’t feel wrong. It feels so very right. You feel right.

Sitting down for dinner with you and your dad? That felt wrong. Very very wrong.

He should enjoy having dinner with both of you, he normally would. He loved to spend time with his best friend and his… oh. 

It hit him again, you’re his best friend's daughter.

The realization was hard, he can’t be with you. He can’t even think of you that way. He decides right there that he wont, he’s done, it’s not right to feel the way he does. 

But then, there you were, Joel tried to sit quietly and enjoy his dinner and there you were. 

You sat there, effortlessly beautiful, listening to your dad talk about his day.

Joel wasn't listening, his eyes were stuck on you. Even the way you ate was beautiful.

After dinner, he said his goodbyes quickly and left, with the excuse that he had some work to finish up.

-

The following night you were laying in your bed reading a book, or rather that’s what it looked like you were doing. That’s what you should be doing, instead you were thinking about Joel.

Joel. The man that he is, the way he speaks to you, touches you…he was so good at touching you.

You immediately focus on that bit, it had been so long since someone touched you that way. You had sex with your ex, but he hadn’t touched you the way Joel had, in years.

It makes you think about how Joel might be in the bedroom, how else he might touch you, the things he might say.

As your mind wanders so do your hands.

They start on your stomach, sliding down so slowly. You imagine it's Joel, his teasing fingers making their way across your skin.

You wonder what it would feel like for him to kiss your thighs, to rub and massage you before he even touches where you need him most. 

You’re wet when your own teasing hands reach that heat between your legs, and your hand instantly slides under your panties.

“Joel…” you sigh into the hot air of your empty bedroom.

Then something happens that changes everything; a ping sounds through the room. Loud and obvious.

Joel Miller sent you a text.

You didn’t even know he had your number, you didn’t have his. 

He knew that because he signed his name.

“Hey, honeybee. What are you up to? - Joel”

You stared, hand unmoving, and breathing heavily, at the text. When you finally went to reply your phone lit up and Joel was calling you.

When you answered the call you were still silent, sitting there shocked at what was happening. Shocked at what you were doing when he texted you.

“You there, Doll?” Joel's low voice fills the silence and you almost whimper.

“Yeah,” your mouth is dry as you respond, “I’m here.”

There’s a pause, like Joel is picking apart your words, like he knows what was happening minutes ago.

“What’re you doin’?” If it’s even possible his voice was lower this time, the timbre of it rings through your body all the way to where your hand is still resting between your legs.

Your fingers twitch subconsciously, and you breathe in a gasp.

“Oh,” His voice was just as low, but the tone shifted to something else. Something that was absolutely dripping with sex. 

That made you whimper, the sound being much louder than it should have just from hearing him talk.

“Oh, baby,” he finally speaks after a long, silent moment. “Y’touching yourself?”

You’re so embarrassed, and so horny, but you’re already this far gone, so you start slowly moving your fingers again. “Can I, Mr. Miller?” Your voice is high and breathless, making it apparent what you’re doing.

“Yes..yeah,” He groans and you hear rustling from the other end, “Y’can do whatever y’want honey.”

Joel lets out a rough sigh of relief, and you know that his hands are on himself, wishing it was yours instead of his. You’re imagining what he looks like right now, laying in bed, hand wrapped around his cock.

You flush, hand moving a little faster under your soaked panties until you get irritated that they were in the way and let out a little huff. Pulling your hand away and struggling to push your panties down your legs.

“Feels s’good, Mr. Miller,” you moan, fingers moving against yourself and Joel can hear how wet you are for him.

He doesn’t say anything for a moment and you wonder if he’s even still there, but then he moans. Joel Miller moans; the sound is godlike and you know no sound will ever compare.

“Tell me what y’doin’, honey,” Joel grunts out. “Tell m’how those fingers are moving on tha’ sweet pussy.”

You can hear all of Joel’s movements, every stroke of his hand over himself, his heavy breathing and soft groans.

“M’touching my…my pussy, two fingers…” you’re hesitant but knowing Joel can hear you and is touching himself to your filthy words pushes you to speak. “Imagining it’s you, Joel. Want you instead.”

Joel. He hasn’t heard you call him that in…well ever. And it’s sent straight to his cock, he never imagined it would sound so good coming from your lips, but it did and he can't get enough. “Say it again,” His groan is breathless and so close to a whimper. “Say m’name, baby.”

You’re already close, Joel’s words only amplifying every touch. You would do anything he asked of you at this point, anything for him to keep talking and edging you closer to your sweet release.

“Joel…” it comes out as a quiet moan, and you hear when his movements speed up, “Joel, I’m gonna, oh I’m so close Joel.”

“I got ya, honey. Come f’me, I got ya.” Your head falls back and you let out a loud moan, hand speeding impossibly working for your steadily building orgasm.

You hear Joel let out a loud groan at the same time, and it pushes you right over the edge. You both came together, writhing in bed, phones in hand. You lay there just breathing, taking in the events that have just occurred, things that change everything. Things that you can never take back, and why would you want to?

“Joel,” you start, staring at your ceiling, the air filled with sex. “Did that just happen?”

Joel is still catching his breath when he responds, “Yeah, that just happened.” He can’t believe it either, he didn’t even take a moment to think before unbuckling his belt and gripping himself tightly. Now here he was, spent, covered in his own come.

-

A week passed. It had been one week since that night on the phone with Joel. 

You hadn't seen him or texted him, but he was the only thing on your mind all the time. You touched yourself while you thought about him every night of that week.

It was about eleven AM when Joel texts you out of the blue.

“Dinner, 7:30, my house.”

Your heart jumps in your chest. Dinner with Joel…he wants to have dinner with you?

A date?

You couldn’t tell, was this a date or a ruse to get you alone, so he could tell you what happened between you wouldn't happen again?

You want to, so badly you want to have dinner with him. You want to do more than dinner with him. But, it's him. It's Joel Miller. And it shouldn't, but that only makes you want him more.

You sit in your thoughts for ten minutes before responding, a final answer, no doubt of what might happen or what you might have for dinner. Simply living in the moment and saying yes.

“I'll be there.”

-

The time on your phone reads 7:29 as you rap your knuckles against his front door.

The door opens almost immediately. Joel Miller standing before you in dark blue jeans and a gray t-shirt.

“Hi, Mr. Miller!” You try to act like you aren't going insane thinking about what you and Joel will get up to tonight.

“Baby, y’can call me, Joel,” He huffs out a laugh, and then quiets down while his eyes trace over you. He's admiring your hair, your eyes, your body, everything about the beautiful woman standing before him.

And you're admiring him, the way his jeans hug him loosely and his curls lay over his forehead. You're interrupted by Joel clearing his throat awkwardly, “Come in.”

Your hand slipped into Joel's big hand, covering most of yours. 

He pulls you into his home, a place you'd been many times before though this time was very very different.

Your eyes immediately darted towards the kitchen where you could smell whatever he'd cooked you for dinner, it smelled absolutely divine.

Joel's hand now rested on your lower back and lightly pushed you through his home and to the dining table.

There were two spots set for dinner, plates already filled. Your favorite food, of course he knew your favorite food. Joel knew everything about you. He knew your favorite food, the names you liked to be called, the way you like to be touched.

There was even a candle lit in the center, lights dim.

The mood was incredibly romantic.

“Oh…Joel,” you sighed and turned around to face him. “You didn't have to do all this for me.”

He smiled, that smile that now makes you weak.

“Course I did. Only the best, for my honeybee.”

Joel's words do something to you and you're on him instantly, kissing his soft lips hard. Finally kissing him.

His lips are warm and soft, and he kisses you back. His hands come to lay softly on your hips while he holds you against him, kissing you deeper.

“Mmh,” Joel hums against your lips as he pulls away, “Later, baby, let me feed you first.”

And so you do. You eat the delicious food Joel prepared for you, you flirt and tease each other. By the end of your meal you've realized that you want more from him, not just the physicality.

You want Joel Miller to kiss you softly, tell you he loves you, dance with him, cook with him, wake up next to him. You want to love him and have him love you right back.

-

Your back hits the wall next to his bedroom door, you've blindly made your way down the hall, kissing all the way.

You part briefly so Joel can pull his shirt over his head but he's back on you instantly, lips sloppily moving over yours and then dragging down your chin to your throat.

“Fuck, baby,” his groan against your skin giving you goosebumps.

Joel doesn’t pull away when he drags you into his room and pushes you down on the bed.

He kneels, the wood groaning beneath him as he does this, he’s at your feet and his hands are immediately on your ankles. 

Those big hands drag painfully slowly from your ankles to your calves, then to your knees. He kisses each knee softly and pushes your dress up your thighs.

“M'gonna take good care of you sweetheart,” he kisses your knee a little higher now, “treat you so much better than him.”

He's not even speaking to you, these words are to himself, mumbling almost incoherently.

“Joel…” it comes out as a whine, “Please.”

His hands are massaging your thighs, his lips are trailing after them leaving butterfly kisses on your skin.

Joel has been waiting for this, for your begs, your begs for him to do something…anything.

“Can I take ‘em off honey?” Joel asks you so sweetly, his finger tracing the edge of your panties.

“Mhm,” you nod, locking eyes with him. 

Joel's gorgeous eyes, his honey eyes, you could swim in those pools of honey forever.

“Talk t’me,” He crawls up to kiss your jaw, “Use that pretty mouth.”

You moan.

“Please, take them off Joel, I want you to-” you cut yourself off with a gasp when Joel touches you over your panties where you need him most. “Yes, Joel please.”

“Yeah, y’like my fingers touchin’ you like that baby?” His question is condescending, and so so hot, hotter than his breath that's hitting your cheek where he left slow kisses. 

He draws circles over your clit for only a few seconds, then he’s pulling away. The loss of contact pulling a needy whine from your throat.

The loss doesn’t last long because Joel is grabbing the edge of your panties and snatching them down your legs. “Jus’ lay back, let me take care of her.” His fingers slide through your dripping heat and he groans, “Oh she’s so wet f’me.”

You toss your head back, moaning, Joel’s index finger prodding at your tight hole and slipping inside easily. Your fingers turn in the sheets and his middle finger slides in just as easily, sending your eyes rolling into your head.

While Joel’s fingers curl inside you, his lips, tongue, and teeth work over your shoulders and collarbones. He leaves dark love bites behind, marking you.

“Gotta get your pussy nice n’ ready f’me, yeah?” He mumbles onto your skin, as his fingers speed up going so deep inside you with how big he is, making you wonder how you’ll take whatever else he’s going to give you tonight.

The way his fingers are moving inside you is unlike anything you’d felt before, like he knew just how to touch you to make you feel good. You couldn’t take it anymore.

“Joel please,” you whine loudly, head thrown. “Please make me come.”

He grabs your chin forcing you to look at him and he speeds his hand between your thighs. “If you’re gonna come, y'better look into my eyes while you do it.”

That does it for you. You writhe, hips pushed into his hand, back arched. You come, staring into Joel’s eyes. Your dad would be so disappointed in you, you know it, Joel knows it. Yet you don’t regret what you’ve just done.

You don’t regret Joel leaning back and pulling your hands to reach for his belt, you don’t even regret when you eagerly undo it. The regret comes when you see what Joel was hiding under those jeans.

You’re gawking, it’s…huge.

“That…that is not going inside me.” Is all you can really say because there’s no way he would fit, right?

“Don’t worry, honey,” he shoved his pants to the floor, crawling back onto the bed, “we’ll make it fit.”

Joel pushes his tip through your folds, sliding up and down, bumping your clit. That sends sparks through your stomach. When he rests gently against your center his eyes jump to meet yours.

You nod, but you’re still unsure. You’ve never taken anybody his size and you weren’t sure you could.

“I got you, you’re gonna be alright.” Joel’s low reassurance settles you a little, and he starts to push into you making you gasp and tense at the intrusion. “Gotta relax f’me, baby.”

Joel leans down to kiss you, one hand on your waist and the other on your chin. He doesn’t say anything as he starts to push in a little more, moving as slow as he can, distracting you with his kisses.

When you moan he pulls away, far enough to see your whole face, “You okay?” His breathing is heavy and his eyes are droopy. You can tell he’s holding himself back.

“Yeah, m’good,” you say, bringing a hand up to wrap through his curls, “I want all you of, Joel.”

So, that’s what he gives you, slowly pushing himself inch by inch into you. His eyes trailing from yours to where he was almost fully inside you.

“I got ya,” is all he says he thrusts gently, fully sheathing himself inside you.

You sit like that for a moment, Joel and you, breathing. Feeling each other fully. It's incredible, you've never felt so full.

“You can-” Joel shifts his hips slightly, cutting off your words and you gasp. “You're so deep, Joel…”

At that, Joel slowly slides himself out of you only an inch, before pressing back into you. His breath knocked out of him.

“Gonna move now, honey.” And he does, carefully pulling out and thrusting back in. He does this a few times until he gets into a slow rhythm.

You haven't said anything, but your moans speak for how good he feels inside you. Moaning out again each time he pushes into you.

His pace picks up and you're in heaven, just you and Joel together in the deepest way. The air in his bedroom is hot, sex filled, and sweat clings to your skin.

“Oh you're s’good baby,” Joel groans, watching himself split you open. “taking your daddy's best friend so fuckin’ good.”

Words won't even form in your head anymore, Joel's thrusts turning your brain to mush. 

His big hands are so warm where they rest on your skin.

Joel's right hand settled at the base of your throat, holding it firm enough to ground you. His left hand came down to rub slow, intense circles on your clit.

Every thrust of Joel’s hips against yours sends sparks of pleasure up your spine, your legs wrapping around him and pulling him closer to you.

Your moans are almost sobs at this point, Joel is so so deep inside you, touching you everywhere, the pleasure is all consuming.

“Joel…” you barely manage to stutter out the words, “It's…im almost,”

Joel of course knows just what you need, thumb picking up its pace over your clit, “Come on my cock, fuckin’ milk me with that pussy.” 

His words are filthy and your walls are clinging to him for dear life as your orgasm takes over you, back arched into him, pressing against his hard chest. 

Waves after waves washing over you, Joel fucking you through it, his pace never slowing but growing sporadic, his moans are loud and rough.

“Fuck baby, m'gonna come.” His hands on your hips pressing hard enough to leave bruises, each time he pulls out he's pulling your hips to meet his next thrust.

“Inside…come inside Joel,” your moans are high pitched and pornographic. He pushes on, fucking you eagerly, chasing his ever approaching high.

Joel lets out a loud groan, burying himself as deep as he can, his seed filling you up.

“Shit...baby,” his hips moving him in and out a few more times. “So good f'me.”

You stay like that for a few moments, Joel still inside you, sweat soaked curls clinging to his forehead. You're both panting, collectively coming down from the intense pleasure of the evening.

Joel's eyes meet yours and he smiles, leaning down to kiss you. Your lips meet in a soft way, soft in comparison to what just happened anyway.

“Joel,” you start, eyes heavy and your body spent. “That was…perfect.” 

Joel doesn’t respond right away, simply peppering kisses over your face and shoulders.

When he does respond, the words melt around you, locking you into the sweet moment with him.

“You're perfect, Honeybee.”

-

• 𝖿ᥱm!ᑲᥲkᥱr rᥱᥲძᥱr who when the Fatui first came into her bakery she swore she was going to black out from fear.

• 𝖿ᥱm!ᑲᥲkᥱr rᥱᥲძᥱr who has Arlecchino taste test her sweets before selling them.

• 𝖿ᥱm!ᑲᥲkᥱr rᥱᥲძᥱr who still thinks Arlecchino is scary but also a sweet heart!

• 𝖿ᥱm!ᑲᥲkᥱr rᥱᥲძᥱr who bakes cakes and sweets for the hearth children.

• 𝖿ᥱm!ᑲᥲkᥱr rᥱᥲძᥱr who insists on cooking and baking for Arlecchino

• 𝖿ᥱm!ᑲᥲkᥱr rᥱᥲძᥱr who whenever a customer tries to flirt with her she kindly tells them off while Arlecchino is giving them a death glare

• 𝖿ᥱm!ᑲᥲkᥱr rᥱᥲძᥱr who is really innocent and cute but the Fatui agents are terrified of upsetting her due to Arlecchino

• 𝖿ᥱm!ᑲᥲkᥱr rᥱᥲძᥱr who also bakes sweets for her plushies which Arlecchino finds amusing

• 𝖿ᥱm!ᑲᥲkᥱr rᥱᥲძᥱr who makes cupcakes and treats for the harbingers!

• ᥲrᥣᥱᥴᥴһіᥒ᥆ who frequently stops by your bakery and buys treats for the children and also gives you hefty tips.

• ᥲrᥣᥱᥴᥴһіᥒ᥆ who insists she can cook for herself, but you always end up convincing her to let you cook

• 𝖿ᥱm!ᑲᥲkᥱr rᥱᥲძᥱr who cries when she messes up a recipe and has to have Arlecchino comfort her

• ᥲrᥣᥱᥴᥴһіᥒ᥆ who gets defensive and angry when people insult your baking or complain about the food you made

• 𝖿ᥱm!ᑲᥲkᥱr rᥱᥲძᥱr who helps teach the hearth children to bake

• 𝖿ᥱm!ᑲᥲkᥱr rᥱᥲძᥱr who gets teary eyed when costumers complain

• ᥲrᥣᥱᥴᥴһіᥒ᥆ who INSISTS (more like forces) she helps you carry heavy boxes n dishes

• ᥲrᥣᥱᥴᥴһіᥒ᥆ who is aggressively kind, “this cooking IS good.” “You WILL let me help you carry these boxes.” “Hmm you better tell me if someone insults you.”

• 𝖿ᥱm!ᑲᥲkᥱr rᥱᥲძᥱr who gets confused when people whimper and run away from her only to see Arlecchino behind her.

• ᥲrᥣᥱᥴᥴһіᥒ᥆ who gets pissed when people flirt with you

• 𝖿ᥱm!ᑲᥲkᥱr rᥱᥲძᥱr who gives left overs from her bakery to the homeless kids

• 𝖿ᥱm!ᑲᥲkᥱr rᥱᥲძᥱr who cant reach the top of a shelf in her bakery so Arlecchino has to pick her up whenever shes around

• 𝖿ᥱm!ᑲᥲkᥱr rᥱᥲძᥱr who always comes home covered in flour and sugar

• ᥲrᥣᥱᥴᥴһіᥒ᥆ who one of her hearth children stole some baked goods from your bakery and she dragged them all the way back to apologies to which you said it was all okay!

• 𝖿ᥱm!ᑲᥲkᥱr rᥱᥲძᥱr who gets cold in her bakery so Arlecchino has to warm her up

• ᥲrᥣᥱᥴᥴһіᥒ᥆ who dosent even like sweets that much but will still eat what you bake regradless

• 𝖿ᥱm!ᑲᥲkᥱr rᥱᥲძᥱr who loves talking about her husband not even to flex or scare people just because she's that in love

• 𝖿ᥱm!ᑲᥲkᥱr rᥱᥲძᥱr who bakes treats for sandrones tea parties