#hufflestuff

*headbangs to Workin’ Boys: A New Musical*

Thanks for listening to my TED talk

Because I need more requests lmao.

"You're not bad. Not good, but not bad."

"Can you hear it?" "What?" "My heart, after you just shattered it into a million pieces."

"I'm sorry I made your dreams come true so fast."

"We all have our secrets."

"I'm allergic to flowers."

"This is gonna be awkward because, I don't like you like that."

"Don't worry love, you won't lose me."

"(S)he talked about you like you were her/his entire world."

"(S)he forgot about you. Remember that."

"I couldn't unlove her/him. Not even if I wanted to and... I don't want to."

"Have you ever just looked at someone and thought, 'damn'."

"Whoever told you to be yourself couldn't have given you worse advice."

"Haha." "Haha" "Don't laugh with me."

"I feel like I'm about to die from cringing."

"If you're wrong about this, you're just going to make my trust issues worse."

"I know exactly what to do." ... "FUCK THAT."

"Keep your eyes on me."

"Oh yeah. That's the spot."

"You're so sweet, you make me gag."

'Dumb bitch.' "Excuse me?"

"Why are you trying to play hard to get when you're already so hard to like?"

"Hey, Y/N!" "No."

"You realise that people only tolerate you, right?"

"You mean so much to me."

"You would be lucky to have me."

"You're inlove with... me?"

"No! We've done this 7 times and you're still doing it wrong!"

"I hate you, but that was smooth as hell and I hate it."

"Why did the chicken cross the road?" "To say fuck off, (character)"

"I'm so goddamn stupid."

"I hope you had fun getting my hopes up."

"Was it all a lie?"

"Stop being so stupid."

"You're so goddamn distracting."

"You're kinda like stars, only pretty from a distance."

"Let's take our time tonight, slow and sweet."

"I trust (character)." "Do you think (s)he knows what (s)he's doing?" "I wouldn't go that far."

"If looks could kill, you wouldn't be able to kill anyone."

"Do you really like me?"

"Wait, I can help with that~"

*Demonic voice* "What?"

"Screw me to hell."

"HOW ARE YOU SO GOOD AT THIS?!"

"Why are you so good at this?"

"There's more than just air in my head, you know.

"It's okay. I'm used to it. People constantly disappoint me anyway."

"You wound me, (character)."

"Guys, I would like you to meet my ex-boy/girlfriend." "Stop introducing me like that! Sorry, I'm his/her husband/wife."

“You were pretty hot but then you opened your mouth.”

“Take me or leave me.”

“It wasn’t real?”

“You want me to be your what?”

“You’re so precious it’s unreal.”

“Hold on, back the hell up.”

“Don’t be a fool, cover your tool.”

“If you think I have no idea what I’m doing, you’re absolutely correct.”

“You’re gonna be the death of me someday.”

“My heart only belongs to you.”

“I guess fate works in mysterious ways.”

“I feel like jumping off a building.”

“You wanna know what else you can eat?”

“I just wanted you to love me.”

“I just had a nightmare.” “Is it because you looked in a mirror?”

“I wanted to defeat you, but not like this.”

“I may be dumb, but I’m not stupid.”

“I wanna die.” “I’ll die with you.” “Aww thats so sw-“ “After I fuck you.”

“Let’s make this short and simple, I love you.”

“You friend-zoned (character)? But why?”

“God! Do I have to spell everything out for you?”

“You drive me crazy!”

“According to my data, you have dumb bitch disease.”

“We just aren’t meant to be.”

“I’m gonna leave now before my IQ drops to 0.”

“Did someone drop you on your head as a baby or are you genuinely this stupid?”

“You’re not bad, you’re terrible!”

“Are you flirting with me?”

Hufflepuff: *taking a buzzfeed quiz but accidentally closes the tab*

Slytherin: *texts huff right at that instance*

Huff: SLY >:0 I DON’T KNOW WHAT KIND OF PIE I AM

Sly: a cutie-pie