#how does one write

Joker tilts his head as he stops a few feet away from the cognition. He moves his mask off his face, but I can’t make out his expression at this angle. “Oh? What is it, Akeppi?”

My eyes narrow at that damn nickname. Why is Joker even bothering to speak to it, as if it’s me? That thing is nothing like me. It’s just a cognition. It isn’t worth our time, though I don’t say this out loud. I’m too busy trying to keep myself from showing my outrage as the cognition’s blush becomes more obvious. Its voice is barely louder than a whisper as it speaks. “Wow, you’re hot.”

What.

I freeze up, unable to hide my shock at the cognition’s comment. Why is it even saying something so...so absurd? Why is it even acting like this?

And...how the hell does it know!?

Wait, no. I don’t have a crush on Ren Amamiya. I don’t. Sure, I spend a lot of what little free time I get with him. I can acknowledge that he is charming and captivating. I also suppose he would be considered attractive by many. But I do not have a crush on him. I can’t have a crush on him.

The only good thing about any of this is that even Joker’s slightly surprised; it’s barely noticeable and only for a split second, but it’s still there. His lips twist into a sly smirk as he recovers so easily. He’s facing the cognition, but it’s almost as if Joker is staring right at me as he asks, “Is that what you think?”

The cognition nods, much to my annoyance. “I’m always talking about you to Sae-san when we aren’t discussing a case we’re working on. She likely knows that I have a crush on you.”

I have to fight the urge to shoot the cognition right between its stupid wide eyes before it goes spilling any more nonsense. Oh, how I want it to just shut up. Unfortunately, that wouldn’t be very becoming of the detective prince. I’ve worked so hard to build up this charade and I can’t let it shatter now. “Joker, we should leave,” I interject, trying to keep my irritation out of my voice. “We’ve secured the route to the treasure already. There’s no point in talking to Sae’s cognition of me.”

“We can get some insight into Sae’s views,” Joker replies. Oh, now he comes up with some valid reasoning. It’s infuriating. “And how could I ignore such a pretty face?” he adds, giving the smuggest grin imaginable, even going so far as to wink.

New plan: let’s just shoot Joker now.

The cognition’s blush deepens, looking embarrassed as it replies, “If you see me as pretty, then you must be gorgeous. I...may have called you that to Sae-san once.”

Great. I had wanted to forget about that. It had been a rare slip of the tongue, nothing more. Joker, however, seems to think otherwise. He chuckles as he wraps an arm around the cognition, his grin widening as the cognition reciprocates the action. My stomach clenches, and I shove the surge of intense jealousy deep in the recesses of my mind. I refuse to feel anything about this. Even as he gently caresses the cognition’s cheek. “That’s so cute. Is there anything else you’ve told her?”

I’m almost grateful as the cognition frowns. “We haven’t spoken much. She doesn’t trust me, not since she accused me of stealing data off her laptop.”

“You, steal data?” Joker asks, not missing a beat as he adds, “You’re too pretty to be a criminal.”

“You’re pretty, though-”

I’ve had enough of this. With a small huff of annoyance, I say, “Joker, it’s clear we aren’t going to get anything out of this. Let us leave.”

This time, Joker does relent, moving away from the cognition. “I’ll see you later,” Joker says to it, blowing it a kiss as he walks away. I follow him and the rest of the thieves, who have been watching in absolute confusion. I am already dreading our next conversation.

We leave the Palace with very little fanfare. Everyone says their goodbyes, and we all split off. Before I can leave, Ren grabs a hold of my wrist, looking quite smug as my own face heats up. “What is it, Ren?” I ask curtly, hoping he’ll take the hint and leave.

He doesn’t, of course. He has that cocky smirk he usually only gets as Joker as he pulls me close. “So...you like me?” he asks in that low, sexy tone-

You did not hear that from me.

“No, I don’t like you in the way you think.”

“Sure about that?” Ren is right in my face, those gray eyes of his seeing right through my statement. I can’t help but notice how beautiful his eyes are. “The cognition said it, Akeppi.”

There he goes again with that stupid nickname. “That wasn’t the real me. It doesn’t count.”

“Does too.”

“How so?”

“Because Sae must have a reason to think that you do.”

“Am I not allowed to talk about you on occasion?”

“On occasion?” Ren snickers as he repeats my words. “You liar. It sounds like you talk about me all the time.”

“I do no such thing. The cognition was clearly exaggerating.”

“I don’t believe you,” he nearly whispers. His breath is hot against my ear. Damn is he such a beautiful, distracting menace. Wait, no. He’s little more than an inconvenience. Distracting, yes, but decidedly an inconvenient part of my life as of this moment. “I think the detective’s fallen in love with the thief he’s trying to catch.”

I’m tempted to back up and put some distance between us, but I refuse to let him see that he’s getting to me. It would only prove him right. “You’re wrong, Ren. I do not ramble incessantly about you, nor do I-”

“No,” he interrupts, pressing his index finger on my lips to silence me, “you’re wrong.”

It’s only now that I finally pull away. “This is getting us nowhere. Perhaps we should call it a night.”

“Okay,” he says, sounding a little saddened at my statement.

“Well, I’ll see you later.”