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And Jared and Holly no longer follow each other on Instagram. It is a bit of karma if anything because they managed to do a decent amount of damage to people around them and themselves just to attempt a relationship
Eh, I won't necessarily say it's karma - but like I've been saying from the very beginning, a relationship borne out of that much turmoil and drama rarely ends in a happily ever after situation.
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Holly further confirmed her and Jared are no longer together via Instagram (it’s on her bird page). I know social medias aren’t often a good indicator of things but judging how Holly has been recently with her posts I would assume she’s taking things *much* harder than Jared.
I wouldn't be surprised, considering she's been seemingly more into their relationship from the very beginning than Jared ever seemed to be (appearances can be deceiving though, so who really knows?)
I just wish she had better friends, ones she could rant to when she's struggling VS trying to use twitter or instagram as her sounding board - and by friend, I mean an unbiased one who would not hesitate to be like "girl, posting that is a truly bad idea, don't do that" or maybe "take a second, think on it and if you still feel this way once the initial anger/irritation has passed, THEN post it".
I guess maybe the connection is like. "It's unfair that I was trying to escape an abuser and now I'm canceled" but like. Her wanting to get away from an abuser (totally valid) doesn't mean her other subsequent actions are free of criticism? Idk like I said I hope she's able to take a step back and find some peace from the internet for a while.
Exactly. No-one knew about any abuse until her heat-of-the-moment disclosure - No-one knew to step in and say "Hey, this dude is potentially doing some fucked up shit, we shouldn't support him" because none of us were in their marital bedroom to know this was going on.
The "I'm the one who's a whore" comes across, to me, as her saying "You should actually be calling Ross the whore instead!" when, in reality, people weren't calling her a whore because of any potential abuse she had experienced at his hands. They were calling her that because of her pursuing Jared who was, at the time, still a married man - which does NOT make it right; I don't think ANYONE should be called a whore, but let's be realistic about where the name was coming from, rather than pretending that the internet KNEW she was an abuse victim and chose to call her a whore because of said abuse.
I'm definitely with you on believing Holly. Personal opinion should never get in the way of believing someone when they come forth with allegations. I did see her original tweets however and they have me confused? The way she talked about it made it seem like people were disparaging her /for/ being assaulted rather than cheating with a married man? Though once again I'm on her side in this. I hope she can step back from social media and take some time for herself to process and heal.
All of this.
Y'all know I'm not Holly's biggest fan - it's abundantly clear that I disagree with some of her decisions and that's not likely to change any time soon - but, at the risk of sounding like that meme, that's just my opinion. My personal opinion of Holly doesn't give me the right to tell her she is 110% lying about being abused just because I didn't personally view it. That's why I'm not making a judgment either way - not until more info comes out.
That part DID confuse me too, though. I get anger, I get being upset at seeing someone skate through life while you're struggling - but the "But I am the one who was cancelled" confused me. It comes across as an attempt at guilt tripping the internet, like a "You all tried to cancel the victim instead of the rapist!" when she hadn't so much as made a peep about any allegations of wrong-doing on Ross's part. None of us were in their marital bedroom - how the fuck should we all have known to call Ross out when she didn't even say anything until 3+ years after their divorce?
Also, it drives me nuts that she's now "Set your boundaries!" when she openly mocked Heidi's boundaries when this all started, but that's neither here nor there.
I genuinely just want her to take a break from social media (because it's clear that it is a great source of stress in her life) and get some counseling to figure out how to deal with her complicated emotions moving forward. I want her to find a place of healing and good vibes - not constantly doing these heat-of-the-moment twitter meltdowns that always stoke the coals of the fire, leaving her with even more regret than she started with.
With the recent allegations, I'm starting to think that Heidi was just collateral damage - she was just 'in the way' of Holly getting what she wanted at the time.
I've thought that from day one, Anon.
Holly was more than willing to play along when it was going to be an open, poly relationship; It was all "I'm sorry that you felt betrayed, I didn't know that Jared wasn't respecting your boundaries; I just want to be friends!" - but the minute Heidi said she was no longer comfortable with having an open marriage (specifically because she felt that Jared and Holly were really in love VS just having sex), it became a tale of how Heidi was hella abusive and essentially holding Jared hostage in the marriage against his will. She practically mowed Heidi down with accusations of abuse to get what she wanted i.e. a relationship with Jared. Like, I'm sorry - but if the man I allegedly love is in what I believe to be an abusive marriage, I'm going to be more concerned with getting him out and to a place of safety - not indulging whatever sexual or romantic desires he inspired in me - and I'm sure as shit not going to respond to him announcing his separation/divorce with an "I'm so sorry you're going through this!" if it meant that he was finally free of his alleged abuser.
(Note: I'm not saying Heidi is 100% innocent in the fallout and initial explosion of drama, there were definitely things that I think could've been done or said differently.)
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Good time to bring up that Chai and another accuser of Jared getting with them when they were underage went to Holly for help and support and she gave their info directly to Jared the person they said abused them. Holly isn’t a good person
I won't say she's a bad person since all any of us really know is the public persona she puts forth - but I will absolutely say that she tends to tweet things about someone should act and then immediately holds different standards for the ones she supports.
Example #1: The initial drama where she said "If Heidi was really abused, why would she go back to the house of the person who abused her?" followed up almost immediately by something to the effect of "It's okay that it took Jared so long to leave her, it takes an abuse victim on average of 7 times to leave their abuser!"
Example #2: When allegations of Jared with minors came out, she said "These accusations have legal ramifications, therefor no one can comment on them or share information publicly" - but here we are, two years later, with her making serious legal accusations towards Ross in a very public manner.
Example #3: She initially supported Adam Koebel during the Far Verona rape scandal, telling him that he just made a mistake but was a good person. When someone called her out on it, she said "trial by twitter is wrong!" - Yet here we are, two-ish years later, with scandal reignited by her using twitter to air her allegations of marital rape against her ex.....using it as a 'trial by twitter' kind of situation.
So Jared leaves Holly high and dry and she resorts to digging up shit that happened between her and Ross?!! That’s unhinged especially after all her “stop trying to cancel people!!” Rhetoric she’s spouted over the years on Twitter. Not to mention she’s defended sex pests from online backlash to creepy shit they’ve pulled so it really feels like “I’m a perfect victim but those other people who point out abuse and assault need to shut up and not cancel others online because that’s bad” rules for everyone else but her huh
I don't know, Anon.
There are several previous statements Holly has made that are directly conflicting with her current/recent actions - like the time she tweeted "trial by twitter is wrong and not the way to deal with actual predators" and yet here we are. It's just at the point of giving off "Rules for thee, not for me" vibes.
Again, I'm not saying that the abuse didn't happen. It could've happened, it could've not happened - I legitimately don't know. I'm going to continue supporting Holly in the same way I'd support any stranger who came forward with accusations such as these - not with blind faith, but also not with blind disbelief.
Im on the side to wait and see. As an average viewer of the drama from a distance. I've notice a sorta trend when it comes to 'twitlongers' or abuse allegations. Usually it happens because the creator who did the 'abuse' is becoming big or have something big going on. And the victim sees an infux of that abuser. Leading to a break down where thr victim will speak up. Then someone else comes forward to back that person up. So far nothing from anyone else. Ross doesn't have anything going on currently. And he admittedly goes directly to legal actions. Usually the abuser fumbles or makes light of the allegations. It seems like Ross is taking it seriously. (I hate to break it down like that but it just how it always look. When things like this comes out.) So far its to early to say anything but i find the direct to legal action interesting. I hope this isnt like some weird spiral on hollys end. (Not that I hope her abuse is real.) Plus she 'recently' broken up with Jared. I just hope its not nothing, like she did this for no reason and it blows up and she gets hate. Cause at this point i think everyone just needs to stay in their lane. If that makes sense.
It feels very much like one of her spirals - and again, before anyone tries it, I'm not saying she's lying, just that it is giving me Vietnam War-era style flashbacks to her previous twitter meltdowns. Like you, I don't hope ANYONE is a victim of abuse - but when the alternative is that she's lying about something THAT serious, yeah, I'm hoping she's telling the truth in the weirdest of ways.
I think everyone's best bet at this point would be to reserve any outright judgments. Allegations like these are not ones to make lightly and best left in the hands of professionals (be it legal recourse or mental health professionals to learn how to heal), not hordes of twitter/tumblr followers.
