Day 90 – the Clothing-Optional Pool

J got up early, returned her snorkelling equipment and went to take photos of the area where Michael had his birthday party, with the special Seychellois rocks. The water was crystal clear and the rocks were unbelievably beautiful. This ended up being J’s favourite beauty spot on the island.

We had breakfast as usual with sparkling wine. J mixed her daal curry with fried eggs again. We saw the aging rocker and Michael, Nina and Liam/Otto. We said good bye to them, as we are all leaving today.

J tried to give Liam/Otto a hug. He wasn’t interested, but he reached out to S for a big hug. Michael gave S his last two cigars as he’s going to buy two boxes at duty free in Dubai and the limit is only 50. Apparently his father will not let him back into the country without two boxes of Cohibas. It was a thoughtful gesture and we will be sure to see them again in London, Munich, or some exotic location.

Given how many times we have raved about the clothing-optional pool, we thought we should share a video before we leave.

After doing a few bits of admin, we checked out of the hotel and headed to the bar for one last drink at the Labriz. We got picked up at the bar and were taken to the jetty for our boat trip back to the main island, Mahé. Although the sea was still choppy, this boat ride was a doozy compared to the previous trip to the Labriz. The car transfer to the Hilton Northolme took around 10 minutes. Check-in was a breeze and we were shown to our room. Although much smaller than our room at the Labriz, we appreciated the very peaceful ambiance and incredible view from our room. We arrived in our room to find elephant towel creatures on our bed, a jacuzzi tub and a welcome spread of Pinot Noir and sweets. We will let you guess which of those items was consumed first.

We also have a balcony with sunloungers, a couple’s sunlounger and table and chairs overlooking the ocean. As there are much less mosquitoes here, we were able to complete a few bits of remaining admin while listening to the waves break against the shore. J sat looking out at the turquoise sea, palm trees, Seychellois boulders and colourful buildings across the way. She can’t imagine a better view or soundtrack – it is very similar to the view from Jack’s beach bar in Bequia or some of her favourite views in Italy. As the WiFi is speedy, J can imagine working from here and will be sad to leave.

We made it to the bar just in time for happy hour. J had a great time taking photos of the bar and beach area. There is a little beach bar which is currently closed, but looks lovely. J thinks this is one of the most beautiful hotels she’s ever seen. The cosmopolitans were excellent and given the view of the ocean and the fact that the menus at the restaurant and bar were exactly the same, we decided to have dinner at the bar. S had the ‘vegetable tasting’ of tempura, grilled vegetables and hummus, and J had the miso red snapper wrapped in a banana leaf. The food was pretty average. The waiter told us there are only seven rooms occupied at the moment, out of more than 50. Apparently there are little jungle cats on this island too. We saw a black and white spotted one begging at the tables.

We woke up early for breakfast to make our 11am COVID tests. Once again, we opted for breakfast curry and sparkling wine. This time, J mixed her spicy chickpea masala with some fried eggs. It was delicious. Of course we sat next to Michael, Nina and Liam/Otto. Nina informed us that even the jungle cats could only finish about half of the leftover meat from Michael’s birthday party.

We then headed off for our 12th COVID test. This nurse is our favourite COVID tester. She is friendly, quick and to the point. We walked to the dive shop where J swapped out her short fins for full-size fins and then took the long-ish walk back to the villa instead of taking the buggy. On the way, we ran into Karl and Melanie. Karl, noticing S’ beaded hair for the first time, got really animated and said it looked like Keith Richards’ hair. But he still won’t produce S’ song.

S went back to the clothing-optional pool. J took one more stab at snorkelling. Although this time she had the right fins, the weather was overcast and the visibility was rubbish. In addition, her snorkel was malfunctioning. Hopefully she has better luck in Zanzibar. We took one last dip in the ginormous tub. S had to have a conference call with his US tax advisor. Apparently the US IRS does not respect the fact that S is on a world tour and taxes are quite an inconvenience.

We then headed to happy hour and decided to order room service from the bar. Of course we ran into Michael, Nina and Liam/Otto, but they packed it in early. Nina also agreed with J that the snorkelling conditions are not easy here so J felt a little better about her total snorkelling FAIL.

After dinner, we headed back so J could get a head start on packing. As this is a multi-hour affair and quite complicated, she was happy to get most of it done before heading to bed. We should note that while we thought we wouldn’t make friends and were prepared to slit our wrists in the ginormous tub, Nina, Michael and Liam/Otto really made our stay. This is further proof that the people you meet can dramatically affect the time you have, no matter where you stay.

Even though S still had a dodgy stomach from the day before, he managed to accompany J to breakfast. Of course we ran into Michael, Nina and Liam/Otto at breakfast. Michael also has a dodgy stomach. Allegations have been made about the ice and the filtered water provided by the Hilton. Liam/Otto was also having a bad day and threw a plate in sympathy (it didn’t break). His mood improved dramatically after J gave him the rest of the gummy bears. S told J that there is a word for adults who ply children with candy – it begins with a “p” and ends with an “o”.

We learned today that S’ little bro has COVID and isn’t feeling too hot. We hope he gets better soon. We chased up the hotel about our COVID tests, only to discover they had forgotten about them, so they are now scheduled for tomorrow.

J tried her hand at snorkelling off the beach, but found it difficult to use the short flippers, which the dive shop recommended. There was a tide that was restricting her ability to get closer to the fish. However, she did spot some Picasso fish and unidentified tropical fish. S spent his afternoon at the clothing-optional pool. J joined him later.

We had a quick drink for happy hour and bought a bottle of Veuve Clicquot for Michael’s birthday. Michael, Nina and Liam/Otto picked us up in a buggy at 7pm. In honour of the event, S wore the Samburu kikoi around his waist. After suffering a mild wardrobe malfunction at the bar, we googled how to wear a kikoi and were able to figure out how to keep it around S’ waist. For those of you who are wondering, given the high likelihood of it coming off, he did not wear it Scottish style.

We were taken to a secluded part of the beach, where the hotel had set up a private barbecue and bar on the beach. The bar was set under a canopy of palm trees lit with fairy lights. It was spectacular. We gave Michael his birthday present – a ‘blue Hawaiian’ shirt. Nina was very pleased as she said she’s been trying to get him to buy a Hawaiian shirt for years or at least wear some brighter colours. He changed into it for dinner.

We started the night off with a bottle of Laurent Perrier rosé. Apparently his friend Otto from Munich called the hotel and ordered it for him. While we drank champagne, Liam/Otto was content playing with his beach trucks in the sand. Dinner was a 5-course blowout with lots of red and white wine. We had a salad and a pumpkin coconut soup, which were very nice. Then came the meat fiesta, consisting of chicken kebab and ribeye steak. None of us could finish our meat. When the waiter came to take our plates, we told him that while it was good, it was too much food for all of us to eat. He then told us there was another main course coming – the pork chop and sausage platter. We tried our best to get through it, but were thoroughly defeated. That is when the waiter told us normally there is a third main course consisting of fish and lobster, which Michael didn’t order as he doesn’t like food from the sea. J was very happy to meet a fellow picky eater. Dessert was blissfully a light fruit plate. The entire dinner was spent listening to the waves crashing upon the traditional Seychellois rocks and listening to Liam/Otto watch his favourite show, the Stinky & Dirty Show. Despite what you might think, it is a kid’s show about a garbage truck and a backhoe loader, and not S’ unwashed clothes from the safari. Nina decided to take the excess meat back to their room to feed the little jungle cats that live behind the villas.

Stuffed, we headed back to our rooms to sleep off our food comas.

We woke up early this morning feeling a bit poorly, but committed to go snorkeling. As we thought a full breakfast wouldn’t be a good idea, J had some mini bar pistachios for breakfast. Thankfully, the snorkeling location was only 15 minutes away from the dive shop by boat (we had previously been told it was 2 hours away). The dive people chose a different location with shallower waters since we were joined by first-time scuba divers.

The location was beautiful – turquoise blue waters and no beach, just large rocks jutting into the water. The boat was lolling from side to side due to the waves and it took a while for J to get used to the water being so choppy. We finally got underway with our Seychellois guide, Jaden. He paused frequently to check on us. Visibility was good and J could see all the way down to the ocean floor, which was around 20 feet down. S’ mask started to act up after about 20 minutes (a distinct downside to having a flowing lion’s mane), so he headed back to the boat while J continued snorkeling. J saw a lot of the same fish she saw in the Maldives (parrotfish, jackfish, etc), and one green sea turtle. She missed seeing a feather-tailed stingray but was entertained by the large batfish which followed J and the guide around as they snorkeled. The guide said the batfish thought J and the guide were food.

Meanwhile, S was getting increasingly seasick on the boat, but managed to hold it in while the boat picked up J and the divers one by one. We then got a buggy back to our room. We spent some time in the room sorting out the next legs of our journey. We went to the bar for happy hour and ran into Michael and Liam/Otto.

Dinner tonight was at Sakura. Weirdly, the food was entirely different. The same dish J had had 3 different times previously was completely different. The sauce was not as dark or as flavourful and the portion size was half the usual size. S barely got through his beef tataki. We went back to the bar to have a nightcap with Michael. We learned that his family founded the oldest gentleman’s clothing store in Munich, which is right next to the Rathaus. Michael had to go back to his room for a midnight birthday kiss and we decided to pack it in early so we can celebrate Michael’s birthday in style tomorrow.

Unfortunately, due to last night’s festivities, neither of us were in a state to go for an early morning snorkel. Once again, we called the dive shop. Today the lady said the weather was perfect for snorkeling but we said we had to postpone. If the stars align and Michael doesn’t pull out any more cigars, we will finally make it out tomorrow morning. Please say a prayer for us.

We headed off to breakfast. Surprise, surprise, sparkling wine. As soon as the cork popped, the couple at the next table immediately ordered one as well and thanked us for kicking off the morning right. They were Karl and Melanie. Apparently he is a musician and a music producer. He has played as a back-up for Manfred Mann’s Earth Band and Robert Palmer. Unlike S, who thinks he’s an aging rocker, Karl really is. He’s got long hair and was wearing bracelets, just like S. He was giving off serious Rod Stewart vibes. He was blinded by the light – or maybe it was just the sparkling wine. We had a nice chat with them. S is going to try and sell him on his newly written song. They live in Malta but have been on extended holiday in the Seychelles for the last 4 months. Nina, Michael and Liam/Otto pitched up and we introduced everyone around. Karl is an interesting guy with a mildly British, unplaceable accent. He’s admitted to living in the UK, Germany, Ireland and Malta, but his back story is a bit murky. She’s German.

J is making some headway with little Liam, at the expense of the Haribos. She has earned at least 2 ‘dankes’ and 2 ‘ciao ciaos’.

We got some interesting intel from Michael and Nina. It turns out one of the large families are actually English, from London. They have been living at the Labriz since before Christmas. They’ve even set up their own office next to reception. This explains so much.

S spent some time in the clothing-optional pool while J convalesced in the room as something didn’t agree with her after breakfast. S headed to happy hour and ran into Michael, Nina and Liam/Otto. They had a nice chat and J joined later to take S to dinner.

Dinner was at Portobello. They had created a couples-only section of the restaurant outside overlooking the water. Although we could still hear some of the children running around and screaming, we enjoyed our dinner. We had the same dishes we had last time. However, they were completely different this time around. J’s plate was laid out differently and this time came with black truffles. We had one nightcap at the bar and headed back early so we could make it to our snorkeling excursion the next morning.

Snorkelling was cancelled again today due to poor visibility. We are rebooked for tomorrow.

We had the usual breakfast, but now we know that sparkling wine is always available. We saw our new German friends at breakfast and had a long chat. The wife reminds us a lot of our friend Dawn in London – very strong-willed and very conservative. We also learned that Otto is not “Otto”, but he likes “autos” and hence that’s why S thought that was his name. His name is really Liam and he’s a little gentleman. We don’t think his mom would tolerate anything else. It’s interesting to learn more about how Germany is faring during the pandemic. Apparently just like the UK and US, there’s a lot of misinformation and the government is using this as an opportunity to control people’s lives.

We grabbed a bottle of Takamaka extra dark from the gift shop and headed to Guest Services to book our dinner. S was pleased to hear that tonight there is a ‘Social Sushi Buffet’ with all-you-can-eat sushi.

S spent the day in the clothing-optional pool, while J hid in the air conditioning and dealt with admin.

Before we knew it, it was happy hour time. S ordered his usual while J tried to go into the water as it was finally nearing high tide. The water was warm and visibility was decent, but J didn’t feel comfortable swimming in light of all the coral and rocks.

We headed to dinner at Sakura. S had lots of sushi and J had the black pepper beef. The selection of sushi was a bit limited, but the tuna, salmon and red snapper sashimi were great. The spicy tuna roll wasn’t that spicy.

Although S thought any families with kids would have headed to movie night and beach barbecue, we ran into Liam/Otto and his parents. His dad’s name is Michael and like anybody else who can afford to travel right now, he is in real estate. Liam/Otto’s mom’s name is Nina. But Liam will always be Otto to us.  

Liam/Otto, is so well behaved. J now loves him. Nina tried to put Liam on J’s lap, but he started crying. Apparently, he’s quite shy since he’s a COVID baby and hasn’t socialised much. Another clear consequence of COVID, is that young children are not getting proper opportunities to socialise. J’s next plan is to bribe him with Haribo gummy bears.

We were woken up at around 5am by the sound of a torrential tropical downpour. The rain continued on through the morning so we pushed back our snorkelling tour to tomorrow to avoid the stormy weather. Same old breakfast. We went curry today. The sparkling wine wasn’t visible, so S asked why they had sparkling wine yesterday but not today. Dinesh, who was one of our waiters last night during the ‘incident’, asked if we would like sparkling wine. We said yes and he delivered. Then a new manager came by to apologise again for last night’s incident and discussed the various options for seating us away from Feral Dad and his feral children. He also told us that the Operations manager would speak with Feral Dad and tell him he needs to keep a closer watch on his children as they cannot disturb the other guests.

As it turned out, breakfast was the only time today it didn’t rain. J has experienced her first proper tropical deluge. Undaunted, S still went in the pool during the torrential downpour. As the pool is as warm as a hot tub, it still was really nice.

Not to be deterred, we still went to happy hour, but this time took the buggy to hide from the rain. Dinner tonight was at the Italian restaurant, Portobello. Because it was pouring, Labriz could not give us a reasonable table away from Feral Dad. They offered to let us eat at the bar, but the bar turned into the kid’s movie area as we were finishing our drinks. Normally the movies are screened outside on a big screen, but due to the rain, they had to move into the bar. After a discussion with the manager, we agreed to sit in Portobello at a table far from Feral Dad. As dinner was delayed due to all of this, Labriz comped our drinks and dinner, which was a nice gesture.

Nonetheless, guess who we sat next to? You got it – the German couple and little Otto, whom we now see everywhere. However, unlike the rogue baby’s family, Otto’s parents are very attentive. We ended up chatting with them at length and complimenting them on Otto’s behaviour. They said that Otto’s actually been acting up because he’s teething. Nonetheless, he is a star compared to the feral children.

Dinner was excellent. J had the red snapper and S had the seafood tagliatelle.

We went to breakfast. It was pretty much the same as always, but today they had sparkling wine. What a godsend. We spent the afternoon in our private, clothing-optional pool and J took a bath in the ginormous, round bathtub. We then trundled off to our 4pm rum tasting at Grann Kaz. This was a nice event. All of the rums are produced in the Seychelles and the tasting was dominated by Takamaka rums (Takamaka is a type of tree that is native to the Seychelles). Our favourites were the dark and extra dark rums, which tasted like vanilla and caramel, respectively. The Takamaka coconut rum was better than Malibu, but the pineapple rum was not as good or as strong as the Plantation Pineapple Rum we’ve had in London. There was also a vanilla and coconut rum made by Vasco, which was sickeningly sweet but apparently popular with some guests.

We learned that the Russian guy who was on his own doing work during the Valentine’s Day dinner is a tour operator. It was quite interesting talking to him about the various locations we’ve visited and plan to visit. He said he is currently on a month-long Seychelles tour. He told us that the newest joke in Russia is that since COVID, the last two democracies remaining in the world are in Russia and China. Sad, but probably true. We shared a buggy back to the resort and then went to the bar for our usual happy hour. We tried new seats today by the beach, which were blissfully light on the mosquitoes.

Dinner was at Sakura. We went back for the amazing pepper beef, which was just as good as it was last time. We had the same waiter we had on Valentine’s Day, Stephen. S managed to get into a row with the main English guy who completely ignores his feral children. Apparently they have been living here for two months and act like they own the place. We now understand why his children came up to our table to bother the waiter while he was taking our dinner order the other night. The guy is a British hooligan who clearly has no manners and a bad temper. It is now clear how these children became feral and we don’t blame them at all. The staff had to intervene and we got an apology from one of the managers, who promised to sit us away from the feral children going forward. Finally, some excitement.