Summary: Anders thinks about what it would have been like to meet Hawke at a different time in his life

Word count: 925

Ao3 <3

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The image came sudden and unbidden to his mind, and it was Marian Hawke in Circle Robes. Anders paused for an instant, frowned, then continued to rummage through the clinic’s supply, ticking off a list of all the missing and nearly empty ingredient bottles as he went.

Here I am, rock you like a hurricane! It'ssssss Wthursday here, and instead of the Scorpions, I bring you...an actual storm? So kind of close? [shugs] Anyway, enjoy some of the DA2 gang doing what the gang does best--stayin' aliiiiiiiiivvvveeeeee, as I type away at chapter 7 of my Handers madness.

Tagging: @softeasun @hircines-hunter @blossom-adventures @babydinosaur930 @mylosingdogs @mareenavee and @archangelsunited, no pressure, of course.

Throughout Violet’s life, there had been many times when she questioned herself. Thought about where she was going, what the purpose of it all was, if she was doing what was right. Try harder, be better, this was the constant mantra repeated under her breath, thrumming under her skin. If not her, then who? Who would it fall to then to pick up the pieces, set everything aright? And still, somehow, it was always upon her shoulders that guilt settled like a heavy mantle, blame weighing her down like an anchor until she drowned in it.

An especially apt metaphor as any if Kirkwall is to be concerned, water everywhere, and nowhere to escape from it.

Looking up at the sky, Violet cannot help but feel the irony of it as rain falls around her in sheets, grey on grey, stone walls saturated and slick as rivers run down the sides, spilling into the streets in great puddles. Water everywhere to wash things clean. Under ordinary circumstances, it would be bothersome, traipsing through the mud, dirt, and grime of Kirkwall, but all she can feel is lightened despite the fact her cloak has long since soaked through.

For the first time since she was a girl, she knows she has done something right, and there is no one to tell her otherwise.

As she casts a look behind her, she grins as Varric and Aveline reluctantly follow her through the late autumn shower down into the Docks.

“I’m glad one of us is happy about nearly drowning out here.” Varric pulls his hood down over his head further with a scowl. “And you owe me a new pair of boots.”

“Anything else?”

“The next round at the Hanged Man would be nice”

She chuckles as they descend the stairs. “Aye, aye captain.”

“The only captain I see is this one.” He snorts, pointing a thumb back towards the guard captain.

“I’m glad some of us haven’t forgotten.” Aveline retorts.

Omg, she’s back again?! Chapter 6 is up and ready in record time! Do you love Handers? Yeah? Then come on over, baby, I’m just getting warmed up. ♥️

Marriage of convenience/friends to lovers, mostly follows the main quest of DA2. Rated E for eventual explicit material.

Link to AO3

Snippet:

"Drinks you say, and a chat?" He scratches the bottom of his chin. "Is that really what you want or rather is that all you're expecting?" His hands drop to his sides, heels rocking him back in place. "I know what this implies, Violet, and I don't think it wise. Perhaps a year ago, we could have, but now--"

"Anders..." A dull heat sears her cheeks, the images he has placed in Violet's head tempting her as they slip further into her thoughts. It would be easy to act on them. Easy to look up at him from beneath her lashes, take his hand and lead him up the stairs, discarding their clothing piece by piece as they--

With a shake of her head, she stops herself.

"No, Anders, that is not what I had meant." Violet sighs as she pushes the tip of her boot into the ground beneath her. If she was lucky, it would swallow her whole rather than have her try to voice her thoughts aloud and continue this conversation. This is not the first time he has brought this up, and from how their relationship has been going, it will probably not be the end of it. But the last thing she wants is to make him uncomfortable or to make him think that this is all she wants from him.

When she starts again, she forces herself to look him in the eyes. "I do really mean to talk. I'm not looking for anything else." Honesty had always been the best policy, or at least that is what her mother had told her years ago back in Ferelden as she cried over her first heartbreak. It may be hard, but in the end, it will set you free. And she does not want to lie to him. He deserves more than that. "I do think you handsome, but I want to be your friend." She shrugs. "Perhaps that is, as you have told me many times, against my better judgement, but despite the fact that you are a possessed apostate made who lives in a sewer, I want to be here. And I'd like to get to know you."

Swallowing around the hard lump in her throat, she gestures back to the door again. "So, I'll ask you just this once more. Would you like to come in?"

Anders had thought Violet many things when he met her. First a potential threat, followed closely by a minor distraction from dull monotony, and even surprisingly more recently, a potential ally. However, of all the things he expected, never was it this. Never was it the dull ache in his chest as he watches her awkwardly offer him a place to be, a hand to hold, and more dangerously, a reminder of what he could have once had.

Hey-yooooo! It's me your local neighborhood drakestone dealer back again with some more Handers nonsense. In some amazing feat of insanity or creativity, I have actually finished this chapter in only 7 days, and it will go up later today as soon as I am done editing. For now, have a taste of the disaster dynamic duo...

Tagging: @oblivions-dawn @babydinosaur930 @blossom-adventures @mylosingdogs @theoneandonlysemla @inkysqueed @softeasun annnnnnnd anyone else who might have some dazzle dazzle up their sleeves. (No pressure ever.)

“Here I was thinking my life in Kirkwall would be simple, and unfortunately or fortunately for me, I have found it to be anything but.”

“It does have a way of doing that, doesn’t it?” She looks up at the sky, stars dotting it as the hour grows later. Constellations glitter, each one seeming so close yet so far off from them. What she would give to reach out and touch them—to be cast off somewhere, anywhere but here. Would their problems seem just as tiny as those pricks of light from so far away?

For a moment, they stand there, hands tucked into the pockets of their cloaks in the middle of Hightown. Some time during their walk they had wound their way to the front of Violet’s front door.

“Do you want to come in? Sit for a while? I’m certain there are a few bottles of wine somewhere in the estate.” She chuckles half-heartedly as she nods towards her entryway.

Sit and talk over drinks—with friends. When was the last time Anders had been invited into someone’s home? Was it ever? Sure, he and Justice had been in her home a few weeks ago, but that was out of necessity. They barely escaped Darktown by the skin of their teeth. This—this is different, and the possible implication is not lost on him.

“Drinks you say, and a chat?” He scratches the bottom of his chin. “Is that really what you want or rather is that all you’re expecting?” His hands drop to his sides, heels rocking him back in place. “I know what this implies, Violet, and I don’t think it wise. Perhaps a year ago, we could have, but now—“

“Anders…” A dull heat sears her cheeks, the images he has placed in her head tempting her as they slip further into her thoughts. It would be easy to act on them. Easy to look up at him from beneath her lashes, take his hand and lead him up the stairs, discarding their clothing piece by piece as they—

With a shake of her head, she stops herself.

A wip sketch of my Hawke with Fenris and Anders as chibis. The current heatwave is worse than the previous one, pretty much hitting some records. I might as well hibernate for a bit, despite having made plans.. Nature just throws a wrench in it. The universe feels unkind. I just hope things improve.