#guitarstatic

The king of hell finally looks up from an old stone tablet that he was reading from. His red eyes full of sorrow as he watches his two husbands anger slowly turn to pure panic.

~~~~~

FAVUS

VIDA

KOUKLA

(Basically Koukla's creation)

I really dont wanna be a bother I promise.

So, this takes place after Adam dies but since I can't handle character death he somehow comes back as a demon for a second chance or something. Vox finds Adam (or Adam finds Vox whatever you want) and they sorta make a deal (no soul, much to Vox's displeasure). Vox gives Adam a place to sleep and a job and Adam protects Vox since he still has his guitar (the guitar is linked to his soul so he cant really lose it).

After a while, Adam decides he wants to give this redemption crap a try because he misses the exterminators and other stuff. Vox decides to go with Adam (why? its up to you, fight with the Vees, he doesnt trust Adam alone, he doesnt want to be left alone again, whatever).

The Hotel crew was invited to heaven to talk about the hotel and redemption as a second chance, everyone was invited and everyone went (including Alastor, shockingly), But since Lucifer was kicked out he really cant go to heaven so he has to stay and watch the hotel.

Theres a knock on the door and, surprise surprise, its Adam and Vox (whos glaring at Lucifer, for some reason). They explain their situation and why they're here and Lucifer's like "Sure, cant do anything anyways since i'm here."

Lucifer now realizes how much of mistake that was. Not because Adam and Vox are assholes, no no he can deal with assholes, but because he is watching the worlds SLOWEST slow burn fanfic ever, in real life. He has to watch these to be so fucking in love with each other but they are so oblivious.

Vox is the type where he doesnt know he loves Adam so Adam could tell Vox "I love you" and Vox would be like "huh?"

Adam knows he likes Vox but hes scared to be rejected so he refuses to say anything and is willing to love from afar.

its to the point where Lucifer is about to do what girls do with their doll and make them kiss or SOMETHING.

If you wanna write when the hotel crew returns, then they're gonna walk in and see a drunk Vox singing something, Adam looking at the TV man like he hung the stars (/pos), and Lucifer looking exasperated while watching the two. Because I find that would be so funny.

(This was written for only Vox and Adam but if you want you can squeeze Lucifer in there or something, idk. I also feel like Alastor knows how oblivious Vox is since he watched Valentino try to romance him but Vox was like "Oh, as a friend!" so I feel like that could lead to a funny scene where Alastor and Lucifer can plot or something to get the two together? I dont want Alastor included in this through ship though, hes just like "If Vox is staying here he will be happy or SO HELP ME.")

Happy writing! -Bell

(I've never wrote anything for that pairing before. What a fun little challenge ^-^ )

Sitting in the parlor with the two Sinners, Lucifer stared them down. What in the Seven Rings could they be planning? "Tell me again why you're here?"

"I already told you-"

"Not you Adam. Him."

Lucifer didn't trust Vic- Vic? Vax? Whatever. He didn't trust the Sinner. Not after what Lucifer's learned from other Overlords that he was close with and from the residents from the hotel.

Not to mention he was around Adam. The first man. The first real friend Lucifer had ever made. No matter what bad blood was between them, he would always have a soft spot for the human soul. That protectiveness was once again showing itself whether he liked it or not.

"The two of us have a deal. He protects me with his power, and I give him a place to stay. However, I no longer have that. I've had it with Valentino, how he breaks our employees, and how he chooses his favorite porn stars over our relationship."

"You two had a falling out and you're the one who left?"

"Yes, well, can't really be protected if we aren't in the same living space now, can I?"

"I suppose that is fair. But if you're going to be staying here, you will not be causing or bring problems to my hotel, her friends, and her hotel. You will put in actual effort by either trying redemption or working here."

"We get it Luci. We'll play nice, okay?"

"Yes, your majesty- Luci?"

"Yeah. We knew each other since I was created. I'm gonna call him Luci."

~

This was a mistake. Why had Lucifer allowed them into his precious daughter's hotel? Why was he the one left here all alone to baby sit them and suffer through Slow Burn Hell?!

With Charlie and the other residents in Heaven for a meeting, Lucifer was the only one here to keep an eye on the two Sinners. So, when he had gone behind the bar to get himself a drink with their bartender gone the other two decided they wanted to indulge in a good drink also. That had been another mistake. Allowing them to drink.

Now, not only would he have to explain what they were doing there when everyone returned, but also why they were drunk. Maybe he'd have enough time to get them sober or at the very least in bed before that happened.

"Dad! We're back!"

Fuck. Spoke too son. Way to go jinxing yourself Lucifer.

~

"Dad. You did this?"

"Charlie I can explain-"

"This is amazing!"

". . .What?"

Lucifer had expected her to be upset, much like Vaggie and Alastor were when they saw Vix and Adam when they returned from their meeting in Heaven. Vaz was one of the people who let the mistreatment of Angel to happen, and Adam tried to kill them. And had killed on of their other friends. 

"I know Sinners aren't your favorite people, but this is a great first step towards your own self redemption! Giving people second chances. I am so proud of you. This is actually what the Hazbin Hotel is about."

Proud? Proud of him? He felt his heart soar at his little girl's words. But he wasn't sure if it was as amazing as she thought. Vox was standing up on the bar singing That's Amore loudly and off key while Adam watched him. Looking at the Overlord like some sort of lovesick teenager. Gross. Was that what he was like with Lilith?

At least some of the others were getting enjoyment out of the two drunks. Angel was laughing with recording the two on his phone and Husk was pouring them more drinks to keep their entertainment going.

"Babe. I'm glad that you're so... psyched for this. But we need to get them to bed so we can go to bed. I don't trust them as far as I can throw them and I'm so tired."

"Right. You're right."

~

"I hate this so much."

"As do I, sire."

Jumping with a yelp, Lucifer glared at his least favorite person from the floor. "Stop doing that, you creepy fuck."

"But it is oh so entertaining!" Offering the other end of his cane to the small man, Alastor pulled him up. "What is not is whatever is going on between those two morons."

"So, you noticed it too?"

"You would have to be blind not to sense the tension between them. Not to mention, our dear Charlie will not shut up about how 'adorable' they are together."

"Not the word I would use."

"Agreed. Now, what do we do about them. Because I will not be dealing with an oblivious and miserable Vox while he is living in my territory."

"Wow. You Overlords really are territorial, aren't you?"

"Oh, like you're one to talk."

~

Hiding around a corner, Lucifer had to admit that as much as he didn't like Alastor, this was a lot more fun than he thought it would be. It had been a while since he had played cupid with anyone. 

"Alright. Here they come. You remember the plan?"

"Yes, yes. You will talk to Adam, and I will unfortunately talk to Vox. And will help them through this little issue so this can finally be put to an end."

"You know, you always sound like a pissed off middle aged woman."

"Excuse me-"

"Shut up. They're here."

Not paying attention to where they were walking, their targets almost crashed into each other.

"Oh shit. Sorry about that dude- man- Vox." Rubbing the back of his neck, Adam couldn't believe he was acting like this. Again. For the third time in his life.

And it begins. Poor Adam was a nervous mess. Lucifer remembered the last time the first man had acted like this was when he had first met Eve. At least she had made the transition into a relationship so much smoother then whatever this cluster fuck was.

"It's fine. I wasn't watching where I was going. Valentino keeps blowing up my phone. Just a warning, he might come here and make a scene now that I'm not there to talk him out of having his hissy fits."

"Nothing I can't handle."

"Yeah. I know."

Face palming, Alastor couldn't believe this man could get any stupider. And he had wondered why Alastor had rejected him all those years ago. This had to end. Now. Or so help him, he was going to kill someone. Most likely the both of them.

~

"I thought you two talked to them and set up a date for them."

"We did. It went right over Vork's head."

"Are you getting his name wrong now on purpose?"

"Yes. Because I'm mad at him."

Angel didn't know what was worse. The romantic and sexual tension between Vox and Adam or the fact that this was actually helping Lucifer and Alastor get along for the first time since they met. Looks like it was time for him to take matters into his own hands. Going over to the two who was causing all of this, Angel snapped his fingers in their faces to grab their attention away from each other.

"Alright. We're all fuckin' done with this bullshit. You two need to just fuck already. That and go on a goddamn date. We can't stand this anymore. We're losin' our ever lovin' minds!"

"...What? Angel that's ridiculous. Adam doesn't- ..."

"Did the right wires finally connect in that empty head of yours?"

"I think I'm gonna go."

"Go? No. We're talking about this- Adam don't you run from me!"

Watching the two run around the hotel like a couple of children, Lucifer was flabbergasted. "IT WAS THAT EASY?!"

(Here is the song I referenced)