#grayson blurb

The board room was bustling, everyone on the floor gathering to play the annual Secret Santa game. You didn't have to participate, but given the holiday spirit that surrounded the entire building, it was almost insane not to partake in the festivities. And with so many people, it made things a little extra fun, considering how difficult it  was to guess your secret gift-giver.

"Y/N! Catch!" Alisha tosses a rectangular wrapped gift to Y/N, who had surprisingly caught it without flinching. It was thin, most likely a card, but it was odd that it was wrapped in a matte, dark shade of red. Y/N was grinning nevertheless, and she couldn't wait for things to get started. She loved the smiles everyone had on their faces, and the rosy red that circled their cheeks with joy.

It wasn't hard to assume Y/N's favorite holiday was Christmas...

"Everyone have a gift??" Ben, one of the office mates, asked, everyone nodding giddily in unison.

"Okay, on three everyone open your gifts!" He yelled, wide eyed and cheerful.

"One," everyone counted along.

"Two,"

"Three!"

And with that, the unwrapping commenced, the loud sounds of ripping and laughter spewing every which way. Y/N waited a long moment, looking around at everyone as they brightly opened up their secret Santa presents, specifically looking for her person; Jared. He looked satisfied with Y/N's gift and began looking around, she took it as a note to go ahead and open her own.

Nice and neatly, she unwrapped the gift with care, opening to what she had previously presumed; a card. The front was a blank white except for a small drawn Christmas tree, and when she opened it up, a couple of words were scribbled across it, reading—

merry christmas, kitten

your gifts await you, i'm longing for you to open them

they're on your desk

- santa

Her cheeks began to burn, lifting her eyes from the card to take a look around. No one seemed suspicious, or even likely to have given her this card. The pit of her stomach erupted with butterflies, unable to tell if she was more so excited or aroused.

Kitten??

Oh, it made her chest rise and fall so very unsteadily. She hoped to god no one noticed her red face and the mess of a fluster she had herself twisted in, only from reading but a few words.

The room began to chatter, everyone conversing with their fellow workers. Whilst Y/N sat silently, withdrawn from the world as her thoughts evaded her very being. All she could think about was what could possibly be on her desk?

"You alright, dear?" One of the older women, Dana, smoothed her hand upon Y/N's back, a slightly concerned tone in her sweet voice.

"Oh-I I'm just fine! Just a bit overwhelmed with it all." She chuckled it off, like it was no worry and the women nodded her head with a faint smile.

"It's a bit hectic in here, I wouldn't mind leavin' myself." Dana left one last little pat on Y/N's back and turned, making her way around everyone with a silent gaze.

Y/N does the same, quickly exiting the overcrowded room and into the eerily quiet corridor. Down the hall and some stairs, she's met with her own secluded office— that she had locked prior to leaving for the Christmas events. When she twisted the handle, it opened with a click and her door swung open.

The subtle light of the moon cascades through the room, and the first thing she laid her eyes on were the perfectly wrapped boxes with bows on her desk. Y/N let herself in, locking the door cautiously behind before taking a better look at her gifts.

Two much larger rectangular boxes were styled on top of each other, golden wrapping paper and professionally tied red bows beautifully placed. The other, much more square, present had a small handmade letter stuck to it, and it read—

these are for later

G.

It didn't make much sense to Y/N, but with a furrow in her brow she continued, pulling at the strings around the first big box. After sliding the lid off, a long, silky black dress sat folded, looking ravishing in the moonlight. She looped her fingers around the delicate shoulder straps, slipping it out of its former box and watching it flow all the way down to the ground. She presses it to her body, her cheeks burning and her stomach full of butterflies fluttering in every which way.

Absolutely incredible..

Holding the extravagant silk to her chest, she opens the smaller present, a breathless shriek sounding from her throat. Y/N covers her mouth, her eyes widening as she gapes upon the elegant diamond necklace proudly displayed against the velvety black texture it sat upon. Another note stashed beside the remarkable jewelry—

i could spoil you like this

all the time

Her heart was beating fast as she opened the third and final present, a set of ruby red lingerie that left little to the imagination. It looked to be the correct size, something that'd hide perfectly under such a thin dress—

be ready tonight

@ 11:00 here

wearing your christmas presents

Y/N slumped down into her office chair, a total daze coming over her, looking at all of her pretty things. It was already nine-thirty, and her ugly Christmas sweater began to feel heavy against her torso.

Who in the fuck could this be?

She felt pulled between a foreign sense of reality and sensuality. Almost angry, upset that someone thought they could swoon her with gifts and she'd fall into their trap so easily.

But how could she resist?

She kicked those hard feelings out the door, grasping all of her new items and making a speedy way home, miraculously making it to her driveway without a ticket. She had little time to prepare; a hot shower, new layer of makeup, curling her hair perfectly, and allowing her thoughts to run wild in the process.

And then, she put the dress on.

It fit perfectly, not one bit of it too tight or too baggy. It shaped her figure with excellence and even Y/N knew she was lethal. And unforgettably, the set beneath was just a dazzling. And oh, the necklace.

It sat perfect across her chest, so simple and classy. She felt spoiled with riches, divine and so wonderfully clad with expenses way past her pay grade, like a dream come true.

She looked herself in the mirror, taking in every last piece of her being while it lasted. She'd be late if she stared any longer, so she whispered a little prayer before speeding all the way back to her office.

No one was there, the parking lot empty. She only had three minutes to spare, and her office was on the fourteenth floor, the exact amount of time it takes if she clicked her heels fast enough.

Y/N locked her car with a beep and made her way towards the elevators, an eerie silence scattering through the entire parking garage. A couple taps of a button and a silent elevator ride and she was already unlocking the door to her office with shaky hands. For a moment, she leveled her breathing, finally twisting the handle and letting herself in. She didn't bother with the lights, satisfied with the darkness that surrounded her. Taking a look around, she didn't see anything different, or anyone.

She walked around her desk, seating herself in her chair and propping her feet up on the hardwood and checking the time on her phone.

"Three minutes late," She flinched, gasping at the sound of a man's voice out of nowhere. "I always took you as a punctual women." Out of the shadows, a suited man emerged. It took Y/N only a second to recognize him.

"Mr. D—" Her eyes were wide and she could hardly finish her sentence, watching the man come devilishly close to her. He snaked his way towards her, slow and deliberate, and he seated himself atop her desk, right beside her perched legs.

"Were you surprised, kitten?" His voice was so dark and handsome, like dark chocolate softening so effortlessly against your tongue. His grin was evil too as he looked at your figure. She took her feet off her desk and her nerves surrounded her all the sudden, stiffening in the pit of her stomach as she gazed at him.

"How— W-Why? Me?" She was at a loss for words, stranded in her own work space as she whimpered beneath the stare of the attractive man.

"You've been on my mind a lot lately, Ms. Y/L/N, a little too often, if you don't mind me saying." He stood again, towering over Y/N only to bend down, face to face with her, and grip the arms of the chair that Y/N crumbled within.

"I must say, you look dangerously beautiful." His eyes roamed her all at once, her cheeks aflame yet again and her body burning with arousal.

"Grays—Mr. Dolan, I-I don't understand.." She broke from his eyes and stared to the floor, nervous and confused with the entirety of this evening.

"You don't have to understand," Softly, he placed his fingers below her chin and brought her to face him. Her brows unfurrowed as she looked into his hazel eyes, a sense of peace watering away her fears.

Her eyes traveled from his, slowly down his nose, onto his cupid’s bow and lastly, his lips. She didn’t know what it was, but her body urged towards him, likewise of a magnet and metal.

His eyes fell too, his breathing softening and his grip on the chair lightening. And it happened..

Y/N succumbed to the attraction, wrapping her hands around his neck and pulling his lips to hers, breaking the silence with a whineful plea.

His hands attached to her waist, lifting her from her chair. She wrapped her legs around his torso, her eyes closed shut and her breathing so erratic and heavy. He removed his hands to support her beneath her thighs, his touch sending shivers throughout her body.

Y/N suckled his bottom lip, a dew-like lust glistening in her newly opened eyes. Grayson groaned, slamming her backside against the window. She gasped, taking a moment to analyze the situation.

“I don’t thin—”

“You scared?” He cocked his eyebrow, a sinister grin upon his lips that, unfortunately, Y/N couldn’t resist.

With a scoff, her fingers went flying down his dress shirt, unbuttoning all of it as quick as she could, as if to answer his petty question. He shrugs the shirt and blazer off, but Y/N keeps the dark red tie slung loosely around his neck, something she’d hold onto later..

Next to go was her fabulous silk dress that she daintily, and torturously, pulled off, throwing it toward her desk with a smirk.

“Merry Christmas, Mr. Dolan.” She twists her hands around his tie, pushing him backward enough to fall back into her chair, whilst she stood in all of her glory. The ruby red set looked extravagant against her skin, and even Grayson could hardly contain himself.

Seductively slow, she made her way over to him, sitting atop his thighs with a shiny grin, his hard erection stiffening against her clothed pussy nicely.

“Someone’s excited?” It was Y/N turn to give him a devilish look, but he didn’t coward away in embarrassment. Instead, he drove his hips upward, frightening Y/N with his sudden action. He lifted her up like a feather and splayed her against her desk, making a mess of any and everything that was once properly set on it.

He hooked his fingers around her lacy panties, pulling them down her legs and off her feet. He crumbled them up and stuffed them in her mouth, sending a course slap to the side of her thigh, in which Y/N jolted from after.

“You think I’m excited? I can see how fucking wet your pussy is from here.” He began to unbuckled his belt, hastily pulling it from the loops. He thought about tying her hands up with it, but he didn’t know her boundaries and he wanted to respect her in that way at least.

He let his slacks fall to the floor, following his seemingly tight boxers, and Y/N sighed in discomfort. He looked enormous, and she hasn’t had any action in months. She spit the cloth out of her mouth, wiping her lips to talk.

“Please.. b-be easy on me, Mr. Dolan..” Y/N whimpered, though she felt that tingling sensation at her core and she couldn’t hardly wait for him to penetrate her so effortlessly and untame. He chuckled, softly sliding his large hand soothingly down his cock, his other hand grasping her knee and spreading her open wide.

“You’re so fearful, kitten.” His words were somewhat contradictory to his thoughts. He could tell her little hole was so tight and woven, and that she was nervous for his entrance. But he would mind her words, and take it as slow as he could restrain himself to. He kneeled to the ground, a softness waving over him as he gripped his hands under her knees.

“Tell me what feels good, sweetheart.” His hot breath felt foreign against her soaked folds, and she couldn’t hardly contain the blush that strikes her cheeks so red and full.

“Your, uhm, your tongue, Mr. Dolan!” Her words were breathless and she could hardly speak, embarrassed of the words emptying from her mouth.

“Good girl,” He slid his languid tongue upon her pearl, eliciting short tremors to implode from the center of her body. He would glide his hot muscle so deliberately against her clit, and she whimpered again for him.

He quickened his pace and Y/N became an absolute moaning mess for him. His tongue continued downward, slipping in and out her little hole while he led his thumb to knead her pulsating bud. Y/N could hardly keep her eyes open, the pleasure was almost too much and she knew she’d be done for any second.

And somehow, Grayson knew that too.

He nuzzled her pussy one last time before standing up again, his cock erect and standing against his stomach full.

“Have you been naughty or nice this year, Ms. Y/L/N?” He pulled her body closer to him, watching her unclip the last garment that shielded him from her.

She couldn’t speak, and she covered her face with her hands. She was slowly coming to terms that she was really fucking her boss right now, but morality was thrown out the window at this point and she felt irreversible desire for him.

“Answer me.” He watched a pearl of precum slope down his shaft, and he was so ready to fuck her senselessly.

“Nice!” It didn’t take a second longer before Grayson stuffed the head of his cock into her entrance, a low and guttural groan emitting from him.

He slid himself in slow, muttering a string of curses and praises as he did so. Y/N felt sore, but a pleasurable friction helped with the agony of him stretching her walls thin.

She whined for more, curling her toes as he thrusted his cock a little faster. She had never seen Grayson so messy and unwound, he was always properly dressed and annunciated when she was around him. But now, he was so devilishly sunken between her legs and a whole different side of him was aroused and ready to break Y/N in two.

He threw his head back, a movement that made Y/N lurch with desire. She felt her orgasm approaching yet again, and this time she wouldn’t be denied of it. Grayson’s was close too, and his pace was fast and loud, hopefully no one was on the floor except them.

She clenched her eyes closed as the knot within her unwound, and her juices surrounded him entirely as she shook with pleasure and let her moans reach his ears.

He uncovered himself from within her, mercilessly stroking his cock a few more times before his hot semen spilled across her thighs.

He collapsed against her, both of their bodies heaving trying to regain their breaths back.

All pages were the same until the pen went over it, recording things until the end of time. They were all the same until she wrote down her thoughts for the day.

Her small hand gripped onto the pen as she wrote down her thoughts from the previous night, coffee cup in the other hand as she slowly sipped the liquid.

Last night I thought of him again, just until I drifted off. I don't know why. It hasn't happened in months. Nothing bad, just a memoir of all of our memories together. Like the time we broke into the school's pool one night. Where he pushed me in with all my clothes on, then he jumped in and we made out by the stairs. Funny how we never got caught since cameras were around us. Or when we had our senior trips to the mountains in Colorado, and how he kept sneaking into the girls' room just to be with me. We were lucky we didn't get caught again. I tried to not keep thinking about him. I know it's time to finally drop it and move on, but how? How do I erase all those memories from my brain? How am I supposed to just drop it and move along? Just how? I don't need or want to know why just how.

She softly slammed the notebook closed, right before she could feel a slight burning in her eyes and a rock starting to form in her throat. The subject of her and a past lover that she was still holding onto, still being a deep wound to her.

She thought about and remembered Grayson every day. After all, he was her everything during her entire High School life, and he still was…...sort of.  Grayson and Y/N started dating in the 9th grade, right about in the middle of the year. He asked her out behind the school's bleachers during lunchtime, a mixture of flowers from his mom's garden that she shyly accepted from him after she said yes. That was followed by their date to the movie theater, where he held her close to him every time she faked being a little scared, not that he could tell, and three dates after he officially asked her out where she said yes again, and that was followed by an accidental kiss, he was leaning towards her cheek when she accidentally moved her head to the side, causing his lips to land on hers. Neither of them complained, just smiled at each other and carried on.

They went on for 6 years, all of high school and two college years, where he decided to break it off because of distance. He went off on how being across the country from one another was hard, and the fact that the time difference from New York to California was 3 and 4. She didn't complain. Didn't give a reason as to why not, even if she had trillions of them. She didn't try to change his mind. She simply said okay, and wished him the best. She still loved him though.

The words that her grandpa had spoken replayed in her brain every time she questioned why she still thought about him; "You never stop loving anyone sugar, you just kinda love someone stronger. If you stop loving them, then you never loved them to begin with" She thought about that, and that made her feel better. Maybe there was someone out there who she would love more than she loved Grayson.

With a quiet sigh, she put her journal away, switching it with a book she picked up at the library a few days prior, yet read a million times.

To Kill A Mockingbird is a book she read many times in school, mostly everyone has. It's the one book from school she actually enjoyed, so she picked it up from the book shop down the street from her apartment before work one day, and didn't get to read it until now.

She opened the book with a small smile, the sensation of the book against her finger bringing nothing but happiness to her, and took her mind off whatever was bothering her. She lost herself in the book, almost done with half of the book before her alarm rang, signaling it was time for work. She left a 20 on the table after putting all her stuff away in her backpack and walking out of the shop and towards her job which was a paid internship at a local hospital downtown, all she did was watch and help out with minor cases like cuts, sprains, X Ray's and the occasional stuff like questioning. She entered the hospital, sanitizing herself and changing into her uniform, walking over to her area, that being the Pediatrics Emergency room where her boss, mentor, whatever you might want to call him, Dr. Reyez, and the rest of the team were waiting for her.

"Morning everyone," she chirped at the tired yet awake health care workers, who all had smiles on their faces. "Morning Y/N, you're going to be practicing by yourself today, can you handle it?" Dr. Reyez asked her, which she just nodded her head with a smile. There wasn't a single ounce of doubt in her brain.

"I'm pretty sure yes! And I can just reach out to you guys if anything, right?"

"Yeah, just page us if anything. Your first patient should be here soon, just go wait by the desk," Reyez instructed her and that's exactly what she did. She sat on the desk for over 20 minutes until someone came in with a toddler covered in rashes.

"Hi baby, I just need to ask you and mommy a few questions, yeah?" She sweetly and patiently asked the 5 year old as his mom was filling out some papers, to which he just nodded his head.

"Okay, Xavion, did you eat something new today? Maybe something you've never eaten?" She asked and both the mom and son nodded their heads.

"Do you think he was allergic to something?" The mom asked, causing Y/N to shrug.

"Well, it depends. We need to get an allergy test for him. It doesn't hurt or anything, we just scratch and pour a drop of the allergen over it and see how they react. Mom, do you happen to remember what he ate today for the first time?" She replied by recording some notes down on her clipboard before telling a nurse to get an Allergy Antibody Test ready.

"He ate everything that he usually does except for some broccoli I gave him," the mom replied and Y/N nodded her head before writing it down on her clipboard and walking them to the testing room.

Once the results came back around half an hour later, Xavion was, in fact, allergic to broccoli, and other things that Y/N had to explain to the mother. She got about 15 minutes of break time before Reyez called her another minor emergency.

"It's an 11 year old, possible breakage or sprain to the leg, you can handle this one right?" He asked and she nodded her head, "Good, they're in room 217, good luck," he added before sending her off to the room.

She quickly made her way over to it, grabbing her clipboard on the way, "Hi, I'm Dr.Y/LN, I'm going to be taking care of you guys today! May I have the child's name and date of birth please?" She nicely asked as she walked inside the room, quickly walking over to the desk area that was in the corner and placing her stuff down.

"Uhhh, Caleb Dolan, August 17, 2008," a deep voice that she could recognize from anywhere spoke as she turned around. Her heart dropped at the sight of Grayson in front of her. She tried to reassemble herself, after all, she couldn't make any mistakes right now, Reyez was trusting her and she couldn't afford to mess the opportunity up.

"Caleb, August 17, 2008," she mumbled as she wrote it down on her piece of paper, "Caleb, do you mind telling me what happened, babe?" She asked with a smile on her face. Her smile turned into a small frown as she looked up at the boy who happened to be in pain.

"Me and uncle Gray were practicing for the soccer game that's next and I fell on the mud and hit my leg really hard," he explained as she walked towards him nodding her head.

"On a scale of 1 to 10, One being okay while 10 being the worst, how would you rate the pain?" She asked, walking over to the walk to grab a pair of gloves, putting them on, and walking back towards him.

"Uhh a seven," he replied and she nodded her head.

"Okay Caleb, just know this might hurt a little okay? It's just protocol to check if it's dislocated, broken, or sprained okay?" She asked and he nodded his head, a few tears falling down his face from fear. Grayson quickly leaned down to wipe off his face whispering a quiet 'you'll be okay' as Caleb grabbed his hand.

"Can you try and move your ankle for me? Just try and move it," she explained and he muttered at quiet yes before moving his foot in a slow circle, she nodded her head before placing both hands over his ankle checking for any bumps, which there were none to find, "Luckily for you Caleb, it's just sprained! There are no bumps meaning it's not dislocated, and you can move it meaning it's not fractured! Just to make sure, we're going to need an X Ray' just to make sure there are no hidden surprises yeah? Dr. Lindsey will do those with you, and I'll be right here when you come back," she smiled up at the boy before Dr. Lindey moved him to a wheelchair and took him to the X Ray room, leaving Y/N and Grayson alone in painful silence.

"So this is what you do? This is where you work?" Grayson was the first to speak after a couple of quiet seconds,

She cleared her throat and nodded her head, placing her hands inside her white jacket, "Yeah. It's a paid internship so it's basically a job, what about you? What are you doing here?" She asked to make direct eye contact with him.

"Moved here after me and E graduated, looking for some roles and an agent," he spoke, his voice not as deep yet shakier than when he first spoke.

"Any luck with that?"

"Yeah. We've landed a few small roles here and there," he answered and she just nodded her head.

"That's good! I'm glad everything's working out for you," She gave him a genuine smile before continuing to fill out Caleb's paperwork.

"Listen, I know it's been 2 years but-," Grayson began to speak before Y/N cut him off. "-Grayson just don't. I'm at work right now, and it's enough seeing you after 2 years, but I don't really need this right now. I'm sorry," She apologized before leaving the room to get some papers before walking back in, thankfully Caleb was already in the room when she walked in.

"I'm going to wrap your ankle up with this and then you're good to go, buddy. Make sure you don't apply pressure on it for two weeks. And carefully when you're playing any sport, I don't want you back here," she said while wrapping his ankle up carefully. She gave Grayson the discharge papers, their hands touching each other for a split second before she pulled away waving them off before walking to where her team was.

"That guy was looking at you intensely," Reyez pointed out, earning a glare from her.

"Don't even start," she rolled her eyes before taking a sip from her water bottle that was on her desk.

"Wait is that the?" Jacob, one of the nurses, asked and she nodded her head.

"Yeah, that's him," she sighed, shaking her head.

"Holly shit Y/N, I knew you said he was hot, but girl? That man is hotter than-,"

"Mackenzie, don't you dare," Y/N joked towards her other co-worker, "God why do you do this to me? I was almost over him and then you put him on my path again? The universe hates me,"

"I'd go for it again if I were you," Mackenzie encouraged earning a glare from her.

"Alright, leave her alone before she starts to crumble, Mackenzie go fill out reports, Y/N go take a breather," Reyez ordered them around and they all nodded their heads, going on their way to do what they were told.

. . .

Soft snores began to quietly run past her lips as she drifted off to sleep, all before a feeling of suddenly falling down an empty whole woke her up. She shook her head letting out a quiet 'fuck' before turning to look towards the clocks on her nightstand, 3:30 AM being brightly displayed on it. Y/N let out a loud sigh, knowing she wouldn't be going back to sleep anytime soon.

Her mind suddenly clouded with knotted thoughts and notions, too many of them just to focus on a single one. She pushed her body up, just enough for her to reach over and grab the small yellow backpack that she lazily threw on the floor, pulling her journal and pen out before throwing it back on the floor.

She clicked the pen and opened the journal, blank pages waiting to be filled up, her hand delicately moved along the paper as she scribbled letters and words on the empty pages, thoughts clearing out of her head, one by one.

I saw him today. He looked different. He's grown. After it all, it has been two years. His voice is deeper too. He wanted to talk, but I said no. Maybe if I did, I would fall for him again, or something. I'm doing just fine, so why did he have to move here. Anyway, Reyez finally allowed me to take care of patients by myself today. It was fun, I liked it, I guess. Luckily I'm free tomorrow because I can't sleep at all now. Maybe it's the repeating thoughts of him running through my mind, or just simply the lack of melatonin in my body right now. I'll probably go to the park tomorrow, stop at the cafe first then make my way there, but anyway, I'm going to try and sleep now.

It was a quick entry, nothing special, just her major thoughts being written down, just enough for her to feel better. She got up from the bed walking over to the kitchen grabbing a water bottle before leaning against the counter and sipping it. She crossed her bare legs over each other, looking out of the big window in her living room. Her favorite part about the apartment? It was the window that looked down on bright LA city. Y/N could sit there for hours and not notice the time pass by, she knows this because it happened before. She left the kitchen and walked towards the window, propping her body down on the small couch she had in front of the window. She laid her head on her hand, watching the few cars that sped down the street, the small yet bright red lights disappearing into the distance as her eyes followed them until they could.

Her eyes softly closed as she laid down on the couch, drifting off into another universe. The next morning she woke up at around 8 AM, doing her daily routine, except she stopped at the Cafe, picked her things up, and made her way to the park. It was an old park, there was an old playground that seemed like it hadn't been used in years. She sat down on an old bench drinking her coffee as she watched the scenery.

She didn't take her notebook out, her mind not having any thoughts, or at least no thoughts relevant enough for her to write down. She just took her time to take her surroundings in. She admired how the wind moved the trees, yet they were so strong they didn't crack. The way the birds lifted off whatever surface they were, and drifted off into the sky. She admired the rare butterflies that randomly appeared just to disappear once again. She simply admired the earth, something that she didn't do quite often; Always being too deep in her thoughts to actually study the things around her.

"They're beautiful aren't they?" Grayson's voice spoke out of nowhere, making Y/N do a slight jump in her seat as her heart raced.

She brought her hand up to her chest, a sigh falling past her lips as she glared at Grayson who was chuckling, "You fucking scared me,"

"Sorry," he sighed, sitting down next to her.

They both let out sighs. Both knowing that there was no escaping the conversation that was about to happen, a conversation that was long due.

"You could, hmm, you could go first," she spoke after a few moments of silence, throat dried making her clear it in the middle of some of her words.

"I'm sorry about yesterday. You were working, and Ummm, it wasn't the right place or time to talk about things. I'm also sorry because I never gave you an explanation as to why we should've broken up. After all, you didn't ask anyway," He softly spoke. He thought every word through, studied each meaning before letting them run past his lips.

"I didn't ask because it's what you wanted. Your decision was clearly made. I mean, I don't think breaking up with someone is a spontaneous thought is it? Your decision was made, and if you felt like I was holding you back, then I had to let you go, if I loved you, then I think I did the right thing." Her words were careful too. And quiet, so quiet feeling that if she spoke too loud the things around her would break.

"I didn't want to break up. I felt like it was the right thing to do, you know? We were always so busy, and we made time for each other, but it was exhausting. And when you were out with friends, I felt like I was annoying you or something," he sighed and she shook her head, the thought of her ever getting annoyed at Grayson's presence being absurd.

"Oh God absolutely not," she chuckled, "I thought I was annoying you. Like I wondered if you talked about me, or not. I wanted to know if I annoyed you because I felt like I did,"

It was true. In her journal, multiple pages were filled out with her question herself on whether Grayson talked about her or not. Even after the breakup, she wondered if he'll ever need her. Most pages were about him, all of her thoughts revolved around him, always.

"I did. All the time, to the point where I said your name subconsciously," he smiled, remembering the conversations he had with his friends about her, and how great she was.

"I did too, well not say but write," she sighed, leaning her back on the bench.

"You wrote about me?"

"Grayson you know I did, that's a dumb question," She shook her head, taking a sip of the coffee that was somehow still warm.

"Do you still write about me?" He asked and she stayed quiet, not knowing whether she should answer truthfully or not.

"Honestly speaking, I do. I write about everything that comes to mind, so sometimes? Yeah," she sighed, knowing that it would be easier if they just told the truth.

Maybe this was the closure that they both needed, yet never got. Maybe this was going to help her fully move on from him, and have thoughts that don't include her.

Or maybe not. Maybe this would help them reconnect. Y/N left it all up to the universe. She was a firm believer that everything happens for a reason, and that you can't change your future since it's already written about. When she got home after a couple of hours she took a shower, lit on her favorite candles, and did the expected. She took out her notebook and wrote.

We spoke today. He told me the reason why we broke up. It wasn't an intentional meeting though, I was just admiring nature. I was looking at the butterflies I think. He randomly spoke. And I know it was long due and needed so I just told him to say it. It's better to just get it over with than to just keep pushing it back, I think. He told me why he wanted to break up, which right now, sounds like a valid reason. I just wonder why he didn't just say it back then. It would've saved me a lot of nights, don't you think? He now knows I write about him, and where I go to write about him. Maybe I shouldn't go there anymore. It sounds out of this world I know. But maybe, just maybe, I should just close that chapter in my life.

There are just too many memories of him at Beachwood. That's where he surprised me the first time he came to visit. And it's where I write about him the most. I could find another cafe near here, there's plenty.

I just wonder if we're ever going to see each other again. If I'll ever fall for him again, if that is even possible. Because I don't think you could fall for the same person twice, right?

That was the last page in her journal. All the pages filled with her delicate letters, her writing being eternal. Filled with on-going words until the end, where an unanswered question laid. The weight that was once on her shoulders began to fade, and for once in her life, the thought of her future no longer made her afraid.

 This is the first time I’m proud of a something I wrote, so if this flops, I will deactivate! Just kidding, sort of. Anyways, yeah, I feel like my writing has improved, and as always, if you have any tips, and/or constructive critism, please, please, please drop them in my inbox, and don’t worry, I won’t say your hurting my feelings lmfao!! 

You had never meant for any of this to happen, not that you regretted it, however.

The Harry Potter movie marathon the twins decided to have with you one night was very exhausting. After a very long day, you really wanted to just take a nap and go to bed early, but as it was a sleepover, they decided to keep you up the whole night. Really though, it was hard to say no to their faces anyway, specifically Grayson’s.

The smile he gave you was unmatched, it didn’t just twist the corners of his pink lips upwards, but it was shown across his whole face. The joy it had seemed to mirror the quantities of the sun but the serene quality of of the moon, always making you feel warm and fuzzy, yet relaxed. It sparkled all the way up to his eyes, stars dancing behind his irises in such a magical way, it hypnotized you every time into saying yes. The only thing you didn’t know was the reason behind it, thinking it was from the want of the movie marathon, yet, it was for the want of something else.

Gray could tell you were tired from the moment he saw you. Every time you were upset or tired, you were rather quiet, against your chatty nature. This state you were in, from the obvious foggy mind to your paled skin, had him rather worried.

“You can go to sleep, angel.” He assured, chocolate brown eyes almost having you melt into the seat, as they always did from day one of meeting him. The effect he had on your nerves and heart rate never seemed to disappear as you though it would, only proving your crush on him all the more.

“I thought you wanted to watch the movie.”

“You look exhausted, take a nap. We we can watch it later.” Gray always wanted to spend time with you, never missing an opportunity. There had never been another person he had ever found to be so incredibly magnetic and interesting. This, of course, was a tad bit of a disappointment, but he cared about your well-being much more.

It seemed to have only have taken seconds before your head bobbled to the side as your eyes fluttered shut. A small smile appeared on his lips as he went to glance away, just before feeling a light pressure on his shoulder, one that made his heart stop in his chest before leaping with joy at the sight of you resting on his shoulder.

It was over for him as soon as Ethan noticed, however, cooing and grilling him for how absolutely whipped he was for you, but he didn’t care. He realized, at that moment, he absolutely loved you being cuddled against him and wouldn’t mind it happening again, or a few more times.

After a couple hours, you seemed to have caught up on your sleep, waking up from your slumber. Gray feels you slowly begin to move, just before your body freezes completely as you seem to realize what position you were in.

You jolt up, eyes wide as you stare at Gray, who smirks at you, “ You fell asleep on me.”

“Oh god, I’m sorry.” You blurt, embarrassed by your awkward actions. With each second that passes you feel your cheeks warm up, eyes flickering around the house nervously. To this, Gray surprisingly chuckles.

“Don’t be, it was cute.” This has your eyes shooting back to him, lips parted slightly in shock at his blunt words.

“Oh my god, just date already!” Ethan shouts, causing you to immediately grab Gray’s empty water bottle and throw it at him. As Ethan yelps, Gray laughs, only making you scoff.

As the boys settle down, you turn back to Gray, not really sure what to say. Luckily, he takes over that task for you.

“Y/n?”

“Yes?”

“I wouldn’t mind.” He simply states, making you glance in his direction, furrowing your eyebrows.

“Wouldn’t mind what?”

“Dating, I would like that.” Again, a flush blossoms on your cheeks as you grin at him.