#gilberto lopez

His nostrils flare, hands going to his waist as he cautiously makes his way into the main bedroom. He immediately spots Letty bouncing a crying Haven on her knee as her other hand is moving rapidly against the screen of her phone.

“Hey, what’s going on?” Coco asks as he spots the dog still barking and scratching at the bathroom door.

Letty snaps her head up to look at him, “thank fu—fudge you finally got here! I’ve been texting and leaving you messages.”

His eyes are still locked on the door, which is now missing a door knob as he gently rests a hand down on Haven’s head to kiss the vitiligo patch on her temple. She makes grabbing motions for him which he obliges, tears streaming down her round cheeks, while he brings the toddler into his chest who rests her head there and seems to calm just a bit as she heaves to subside her cries.

Coco pats and rubs her back soothingly as Letty gets back to her feet, using her foot to nudge Jody the Tosa out of the way, “I went to a meeting after work, I sent that in the group chat before I shut my phone off.”

“Yeah newsflash, maybe you shouldn’t do that when you have a very vocal fucking baby at home.” Letty bites as she knocks on the door leaning downwards, “y/n, coco’s here!” She tells before whipping her head back to her father, “Now fix the door.”

He’s confused as he makes his way over to the bathroom door, spotting a stain of blood dripping from the outside of where the doorknob was supposed to be. “What the fuck did you do Leticia?”

“Me?! I didn’t do anything!” Letty yells while her brows immediately frown, “your girlfriend somehow locked herself in the bathroom and has been in there for I don’t know maybe an hour or an hour in a half? She managed to punch the knob out after I loosened it.”

Coco shakes his head, eyeing the tools tossed all over the floor and hands Haven back to Letty, “take your sister and go feed her, she’s probably hungry and it’s past dinner time.”

“Shit, I lost track of time.” Letty stands up straight and scrambles to leave the room but not without calling back out to you, “if coco doesn’t get it y/n, I’m calling the locksmith!”

Coco sucks his teeth as he shoos the girl out of your shared room, “I am the locksmith.”

Letty widens her eyes with a scrunch of her nose, “we don’t need anymore injuries in this household thank you, we have a baby in the house.”

Coco rolls his eyes as it’s his turn to go into a squat position and peer through the gap, it’s slightly blocked by the remaining latch bolt. He peeks in just enough to see you laying on your back on the rug, bandaged hand cradled to your chest as you’re staring up at the ceiling.

Completely over it.

“Hey, mamita. What happened?”

Your head lolls to the side to meet coco’s dark eye, “I went to unlock the door and it wouldn’t budge. Took Letty fifteen minutes to realize I was stuck in here since she’s so deep into Shahs of Sunset and I didn’t have my phone on me. I managed to punch the knob out.”

“Why not kick? Now you done fucked up your hand I see.”

“Rather that than my foot.” You wiggle your toes, “you gonna get me out of here soon right, johnny?”

A crooked smile appears on Coco’s lips then, “I’ll think about it.”

Jody growls at him from his left, making coco suck his teeth while you can be heard laughing from inside the bathroom. “I know this fool isn’t trying to raise up on me?”

“He likes me better.”

“‘Cause he likes to hump your leg.”

“Ew, shut up Johnny!”

Coco laughs and looks at the tools that were previously used: a hanger, a screwdriver, and some hair oil. He analyzes the door, then the mechanism and just shrugs grabbing the hammer to knock the latch clean off the door. It flies towards you, lying about an inch away from where your shoulder lays.

Coco instructs, “You might want to cover your face for this next part.”

“What?” You start just as Coco lunges the claw side of the hammer into the side of the gap, yanking it back with such force he thought the claw would snap. Thankfully it didn’t as it gave way, leaving him to keep swinging the claw into space before switching back to the flat side to knock out the edge of the cheap door.

The door creaks open as he pushes it back once a good chunk of the door is missing. Rolling back to face the door with an arm tossed over your forehead, you meet your boyfriend’s eyes.

“Hey,” he greets almost like a mad man as he’s breathing harshly now at that work he just put in.

You slowly get to your feet to meet both of Johnny’s dark eyes this time, “hey, we’re gonna need a new door.”

You grip the sides of his torso as you peck his jaw in thanks while he just scoffs, “fuck that door. It was a cheap piece of shit and I’ve got a better idea anyway.”

Which could mean anything.

He reaches down to pick up your wrist, examining your injured fingers, “think you broke any of ‘em?”

“Probably that middle finger but the rest im thinking a bad sprain,” you inform while Coco nods his head, figuring you would know better than anyone being a middle school nurse and all.

Coco shakes his head, a signature crooked smile playing on his lips, “Guess you won’t be giving nobody the bird for a little while, huh?”

“I’m left handed anyway.” You remind Coco who nods his head in realization, “thanks for getting me out. How did today go?”

Johnny gives a sharp inhale with a lift of his shoulders, “same shit everyday. We talk about feelings and shit. It’s the anniversary of Hope’s death and I was talkin’ to one of the sponsors there, he gave me some info to look into for Leticia.”

Letty losing not only one but two of her friends tragically was enough to mess with anyone’s mental. She already had a lot going on before that and the move out here steered her in the right direction somewhat. She openly talked about starting her own business after quitting (and being fired) from numerous of jobs. So far being a instructor that provided swimming lessons to toddlers seemed to be the one that stuck while creating a webpage for her upcoming house sitting business.

She was much like Johnny, not wanting to open up and when she gave just enough she didn’t want to be seen as weak. You had enough experience with that yourself, growing up with caregivers in the military that had their own battles which ultimately left you to be raised and adopted by your godmother who was far from rough around the edges. You learned to love Johnny and Letty through it all but you were also firm in letting them both know that you wouldn’t be their punching bag.

You completely changed the trajectory of Johnny and Letty’s life, making them often forget what life was like before you walked in. Yet there were always reminders in the black of their brain and sure you could hold them down but you couldn’t be their sole savior.

They had to find that within themselves.

That’s that deep shit Coco had to hear plenty of times and knew Letty wouldn’t want to but would eventually have to.

“That’s good, babe.” You offer a smile as you squeeze his upper arm, “we’ll talk about it some more when we put that swing up out front.”

You’re getting ready to exit the bathroom when Coco grips your wrist causing you to look back at him.

“The swing? Nah we’re not gettin’ into that with your hand all fucked up.” Coco already decided.

“I’ll supervise.” You beam, “c’mon I’ve been wanting that thing up since the first day of spring and summers approaching in the next few weeks!”

Coco blinks, “and I said I’d get to it.”

“Just like the emissions for my car when I was pregnant with Haven, got stranded and ended up with minor carbon monoxide poisoning?” You pointed out while the tatted man rubs his jaw in annoyance.

Which was enough indication for you to laugh and wrap an arm across his waist, knowing that you won, “fine but like you said, supervise. Not be in my fucken ear like a flea.”

“I know you like to get into your zone when you’re working but what we’re not gonna do is compare your girl and mother of your beautiful baby to an insect.” You yank on his earlobes making him hiss.

Smiling sweetly at him after, you quickly peck his crooked nose and bite his jaw before taking your leave, “glad you’re home, papa.”

Coco rolls his eyes and tossed the hammer into the toolbox, knowing he would get to it later before joining his family in the kitchen.

‘I don’t think she noticed my new cut,’ Coco finds himself thinking as he watches you move around the kitchen, working on heating up the leftovers while he’s tasked with making sure Haven doesn’t start throwing any vegetables she doesn’t like around again and Letty is screaming at the tv.

“Aye, who we yellin’ at?” Coco questions from the dining room which has three views: a sliding door that leads to the backyard to the left, straight ahead the kitchen can be partially seen, and then to the right flows into the living room.

Letty huffs as she tosses her phone down on the couch glancing in Coco and Haven’s direction, “fu—freaking Reza! He’s so annoying!”

“Then cut the shit off and go help y/n warm up the food.” Coco tells Letty who side eyes him.

She snipes, “I already took care of Haven and set the table…what’re you doing coco?”

“Paying bills.”

You twist your lips around in the kitchen, thankful the twenty-one year old couldn’t see your facial expression right now, not that you were ever scared of Letty but you also weren’t in the mood to deal with her mouth, especially being locked in the bathroom for forever.

“And I would be too if y/n didn’t give me a break!” Letty argued.

Finances became really rough once Coco got struck with addiction. Not that it was ever the greatest when Letty lived with Celia but she was the main one who had to hold it down once Coco got infected with the disease. So she didn’t appreciate Coco throwing that in her face when he should have been the adult who paid bills to provide for her and it was always a ongoing argument between the two, which is why you remained quiet once you sensed that starting to brew.

Thankfully with the progress of being sober and getting a job down at the shooting range as a range officer, Coco was on the path of being financially stable and you were the best at managing funds although Coco often clowned you for considering shopping for the house and the girls as “errands,” you were good at having a balance with money and into numbers a bit after living in a transformed school bus turned home (illegally if you want to be technical) with your god-mommy. She was a free-spirited woman who was into protests, loaded with money but still chose to park the bus/home out in the woods on some land that rightfully belonged to her ancestors before the law colonized it. It was sacred land and after her passing you did everything in your power to gain rights to that land yourself, later transforming it into a garden in honor of loved ones lost.

Life was forever blossoming and you always wanted to continue experiencing that growth. When coco came back into your life, it was unexpected but meant to be—you’d like to think. It’s like that saying, “if it comes back around then it’s meant to be.”

The both of you knew each other back in school and lost touch until he moved out here to Ojai. By then he was already in a program, leaving behind the Mayans to better his mental health. You already knew he was in some type of biker gang, thanks to being friends with Gilberto Lopez on Facebook. Curiosity always got the best of you and you didn’t have much to go off of since you couldn’t locate him anywhere on Facebook but found Letty through Celia’s page.

He was barely on Letty’s page too after spotting a comment where she went off on some lady who was friends with Celia, for making inappropriate comments on a picture the twenty-something year old shared for his birthday. It was causal lurking not anything stalker-ish and you didn’t want to reach out to Gilly about coco either since you didnt want to appear desperate—despite your besties begging you to just shoot your shot through Gilly.

That didn’t happen until coco came here.

It was like the universe knew to give you two a second chance and the both of you didn’t want to miss it. However you were content on just being friends but that wasn’t in Coco’s plans once he truly got to know the version of you now. Eventually he got you out of your own stubbornness and wasn’t one to beg but Coco knew you were worth it.

When you’re zoned back in on the conversation, bringing the food out to the table you spotted Letty now sitting in her usual seat resting her cheek into her fist while Coco shoved her shoulder with a snort, evoking the girl to shove him back with a smile just in time for them to start playfully throwing hands but you warn them to, “cut the crap you two, you’re at the table now act like you have some sense please.”

“My bad, mamita.”

“He started it.”

You playfully glare at them as you take your seat, lifting the silicone bib to wipe at the corner of Haven’s mouth before waving your hands along signaling for everyone to start serving themselves.

Johnny and Letty did not hesitate, which led to chatter at the dinner table, making Coco further grateful for this little life.

Later that night with the crickets chirping, the both of you have quality time as you’re seated on the grass while coco is drilling the chains to the swing into the brown beams out front.

“Hey babe, meant to tell you this earlier but I’m feeling the new look.” You announce after putting your phone down from taking many pictures of the process.

Coco glances over at you from the ladder, “yeah? I didn’t think you noticed.”

“Oh I definitely did,” you smile, “loved the Brazilian loose waves just as much as the Gretchen Grundler pigtails but hair grows back and it always fun to switch it up ya know?”

You don’t miss coco rolling his eyes at your attempt of dragging his hair but knows you’re joking nonetheless. He can also tell by the way you’re looking at him from the ground that you’re really a fan of the cut, “I’m almost finished here so you can show me how much you’re digging the hair up in our room, huh?”

Sighing you pout, “only if we weren’t getting up early to hang out with Bruno and Luis.”

That’s right ever since he got with you, he was able to reconnect with his two other kids. It took a lot of fight from Bruno’s mom for coco to be in Bruno’s life—who was now fourteen—threatening back child support out of pettiness (she honestly thought he died because of what Celia once told her after he got locked up) and Luis, who was ten and acting out way before coco came back into his life was still trying to get a feel for this stranger of a man who happened to be his father. Luis was quiet but there was a fire behind the shared eyes he has from his father.

Life was always a timely journey and you taught Coco patience.

“Look at it like this, I’ll have you out by midnight.” Coco smirks, checking his own phone for the time and to see a text from Bruno’s mom to confirm if you guys were still coming out to Montecito.

Bruno and Luis’s mom became good friends, often allowing the boys to spent the night at each other’s houses. Although Luis lived out in Carpinteria with his mother and siblings; which was nowhere from Montecito the two women made it their jobs for the siblings to have a relationship. Which was shocking on Bruno’s mom’s part to be honest. Bruno’s mother was still shady towards you, not liking the fact that coco picked you to spend forever with although she had a new man, she still felt a type of way but you knew not to take that personally…yet you were no punk and wouldn’t always bite your tongue.

You mockingly yawn, stretching your arms above your head, “you know I can’t get into the groove with open doors.”

Coco sucks his teeth, “well you better get used to it mamita, that doors not comin’ back.”

“Qué?”

“That open concept shit you always talk about when we’re watching that home channel…well you’re gonna get it for the bathroom.” Coco double checks that the swing is secure before he starts climbing down the ladder, “and I get a show every time you get out the shower. So everybody wins.”

Scowling at the smirk on your boyfriend’s face, you push off your ankles to your feet, making your way over to the cute farmhouse like swing, “You’re no better than Jody.”

“I’n the fucken man of the house, not the dog.” Coco tells as he slips a hand over your waist as you go to sit on the swing.

“Don’t think I know the difference,” you joke once more as Coco bumps his nose against your cheek, now sitting beside you as you softly sway into the night.

With your good hand, you run a hand over coco’s shortened hair with a smile before resting your head on his shoulder with another yawn, “seee, this is nice isn’t it?”

“Yeah it’s cool but now none of us are going to be in the house.”

All of you were always out and about. If it wasn’t work, coco was out riding or tuning up the bike or doing woodwork, letty was sunbathing and used to be in the hot tub a lot until you two took over and that was enough for her not to want any parts leaving her to run the streets with the car along with Jody in the passenger side or fix up the car coco let her keep. You just liked being in the backyard to be “corny,” in the Cruz’ words one with nature birdwatching or with Haven who liked running around letting you and coco know that she would probably grow up to be involved in some sort of athletics one day. However once those bugs wanted to be seen by you? Then it was time to wrap it up and go right inside.

“We’ll get to enjoy the inside more once we’re old as hell.”

“I like my own personal granny already,” coco laughs while you elbow his gut, “ow, what? You were the one crying about your back the other night?”

“That’s because you left one of your stupid chains to your jeans in the bed.”

“My bad, thought you were into bondage.” Coco felt his lips twitch in humor until you lifted your head to glare at him.

“Johnny.”

“Y/n,” he says back in a warning tone but teasing, “aye show me some love, I got you out that bathroom and put this grandma shit up. You don’t got to bring up old shit, you know?”

“That was two days ago but whatever,” you respond yanking his jaw to turn his lips to brush against yours, “love you papa, now sssh and let’s enjoy the warm night.”

Coco lets out a sigh, squeezing your waist as you get comfortable back against his shoulder. “You better, brat.”

“After you…butt sniffer.”

“Always got to have the last word, don’t you?” Coco sucks his teeth, ready to nudge your head off him if you didn’t look so cute relaxing against him, aware that you were comparing him to a dog yet again while you laugh, tossing your knee over his, intertwining your fingers (the good ones) with his as you sink into the freedom of the night together.

You laughed, letting him sway you with the beat, but your gaze kept flicking across the room — straight into the molten stare of your brand new husband.

Gilly was posted up at the bar with Bishop, beer bottle in hand, that broad, hulking frame impossible to miss in the chaos of the reception. His kutte was open over his dress shirt, sleeves rolled, the tie long gone. His eyes hadn’t left you in… Christ, you couldn’t remember how long. Not since you hit the dance floor with Coco.

Bishop followed his line of sight and smirked, leaning on the bar. “You look like you’re about to eat somebody alive.”

Gilly’s lips barely moved, but you could see the tension in his jaw. “Been waiting all fuckin’ day to get her alone. You think I give a shit if it’s my wedding? She’s mine.”

“Uh-huh,” Bishop chuckled, sipping his drink. “Could always tell everyone the happy couple needed to ‘freshen up.’”

Gilly shot him a look, low and deadly. “I ain’t askin’ permission.”

When your husband started moving across the floor, you knew before he even reached you what was about to happen. The heat in his gaze was enough to make your thighs press together.

Coco felt the shift in the air and laughed, throwing up his hands. “Alright, alright — I’m not about to get my ass kicked on your wedding day, man.” He backed away with a wink.

The second Coco’s hand left your waist, Gilly’s was there, huge and warm, curling possessively around you. His other hand slid to the small of your back, pushing you toward the hallway that led to the restrooms.

“Gilly—” you started, but he cut you off with a growl low in his throat.

“Don’t say my name right now, baby. Not unless you want me to fuck you against the wall before we even make it to the door.”

The bathroom door slammed behind you. You barely had time to breathe before he was on his knees, massive hands curling around your hips, dragging you backward until your spine hit the cool tile wall.

“Been thinkin’ about this since I saw you walkin’ down the aisle,” he rasped, shoving your skirts up, shoving more layers until cool air kissed your thighs. “Do you have any idea what that dress does to me?”

“Gilly—”

“Gonna make you scream for me, baby. Everybody out there’s gonna know exactly what I’m doin’ to my wife.”

His mouth was on you before you could say another word.

The heat of his tongue hit you like a lightning strike, hot and wet, dragging slow from the bottom of your slit to the aching peak of your clit. You gasped, hands flying to the back of his head, fingers sinking into his flesh as he groaned against you like he’d just been handed his last meal.

The thickness of his beard scraped the insides of your thighs, rough and delicious, as his tongue circled you, lapped at you, pressed inside you until you felt your knees buckle. His grip tightened, holding you steady, forcing you to take every filthy stroke of his tongue.

“God, you taste so fuckin’ good,” he muttered into you, voice wrecked. “My wife… my perfect fuckin’ wife.”

You could barely breathe, hips rolling forward into his mouth. His lips sealed around your clit, sucking hard, while his tongue flicked back and forth so fast you cried out, your voice echoing off the tiles.

“Gilly—oh, fuck—”

“That’s it, baby,” he groaned, one of his hands sliding between your thighs, two thick fingers pushing into you without warning. The stretch made you whimper, the heel of his palm grinding against you while his mouth never left your clit. “Come for me. Right fuckin’ now.”

The pleasure tore through you like fire, your entire body jerking against him as you came, muffling your scream into your own wrist to keep from alerting the entire clubhouse. He didn’t stop — kept licking you through it, drinking you down like he could live on nothing else.

When he finally stood, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, his pupils were blown wide, chest heaving. He kissed you hard, shoving your taste into your mouth, pressing you back against the wall.

The clouds were rolling in, you heard the thunder in the distance as you sat on the back of your wrap around porch staring out at the ranch in your backyard. You pulled your cardigan tight around you out of instinct as the breeze from the storm on its way in, blew past you. The dark clouds casted a shadow on the large land of property that made up your backyard, the free-range chickens you owned had retreated into their coop, the two horses you took care of were nestled safely in the barn you had just 500 feet away from the house, and your dog was alert on your left hand side as he stared up at the rumbling sky. 

“Come on, boy, let’s get inside before it starts coming down.” You stood up and opened the back door and nodded for your dog to go inside. 

Your timing was impeccable, just as you closed the screen door, the rain started. The living room walls were filled with windows, you could see the droplets throughout every window on every window that surrounded the room. The sound of the water pelting against the roof and the deck filled the house, it was loud and mixed with the rumbling of the thunder. It needed to be drowned out, so you moved over to the record player you had set up by the front of the living room. 

The memory of the last time you used the record player was coming up short, but seeing the Sam Hunt record in the player made you smile. Placing the needle on the record, it scratched for a minute before the music started playing. It brought you back to a time in your life, there wasn’t much other way to describe it besides a time. It wasn’t something you’d describe as the best time in your life, not in the slightest, but there were some moments that weren’t completely horrible. 

“Come on! Grab your drink!” 

Those were the famous last words your bunkmate said before she dragged you onto the dance floor. You remember the beat of the banjo playing so loudly as you moved to the beat. It was the last night of Ranger School, you had graduated earlier in the day, your friends and family had come and gone already to wish you well before they shipped you off to your assignments.

You weren’t alone on the dance floor, you were in Georgia, so when Sam Hunt was playing, the crowd tended to thicken up a bit. The noise got louder from people singing along, and although it wasn’t your go-to selection, it was fun in comparison to everything training had put you through. You remember feeling beer dripping down your jeans as you jumped up and down with the mix of Ranger graduates and town locals, but you didn’t mind one second of it. You just loved having the excuse to wear something other than your green service uniform. 

As the song reached its last minute, you had started to sing along to the lyrics, your laugh was contagious by those around you as you enjoyed the celebration. You were drunk, there was no two ways about it, and you weren’t alone in that, everyone around you was too. Some people attempted to line dance, because choreographed moves were the perfect thing for a bunch of drunks, but everyone seemed to make it work. Except him. And you heard his voice in your ear as you were trying to keep up with those around you in the last moments of the song. 

“Can you show me how to do this shit so I don’t make a total fucking ass of myself?” 

You smiled at the comment, and turned to him. Lopez. You had worked with him over your summer of training, but to say you knew him well would have been an exaggeration. 

“And you think I know what I’m doing?” You chuckled as you looked back at him. “I’m just following everyone else. It’s like a kick kick step step turn thing.” 

“Right.” Gilly was trying to catch up as he moved next to you. It was hilarious to watch but it was also nice, having someone else with you that didn’t exactly know what was happening. “Man, I wish they’d turn this country shit off.” He whispered to himself as he tried to follow along with his feet.

As the song came to a close, you spoke up to him. “Didn’t peg you as the line dancing type.” 

“I’m running a bet with the guys.” He pointed back to his group of friends. “Longest one to stay out on the dance floor, actually trying, gets their tab taken care of.” 

“You do realize we’re in a bar full of locals who love buying drinks for anyone in the service?” You frowned at him. 

“Yea but there’s just something really fulfilling about Timmer paying my tab off for me, you know?” He was laughing back with you. 

Now that, you understood. Timmer was a real asshole, said things that got under everyone’s skin so if that was what was on the line, you’d help Lopez out. The song changed, it slowed down. A crowd of people left the dance floor, while a new crowd also filled it. Gilly looked around and saw just one person he was in on the bet with left on the floor with someone in their arms. 

“Need a partner?” You spoke up, hand extended out to him. Out of nerves, he laughed and took your hand in his, your other arm moved to hang around his shoulder loosely as you both began swaying to the music. 

“Thanks for helping me out.” Gilly said to break the silent tension. 

“Look, anything to make Timmer get the shit end of a stick, but I’m thinking I should negotiate something out of this deal for myself.” You made a face as if you were thinking. 

“I mean, fair is fair.” Gilly said as he took the lead and moved you around the dance floor. “What’d you have in mind.” 

It was a tactic, but it worked, it had you shocked for a minute that he had taken the lead. 

“I want my tab covered, too.” There were likely a million other things you could have negotiated from this, his dessert during meal time, laundry, literally anything but you were so caught off-guard you just said something quickly. 

“Deal.” He agreed quickly. 

Both of you stopped talking and continued to move slowly, swaying back and forth, the silence between you both allowed you to hear the lyrics of the song. 

“You and me, wild and free. Way out in the woods, nobody for miles.” 

Those lyrics brought you back to the present moment, in your shared home with Gilly that way out in the woods, nobody for miles. Now, some probably would have said that was the night that started it all between you, but after those dances, and a few drinks, both of you went back to your respective bunks and didn’t speak to each other until a week later when you were both deployed to the 2nd battalion in the 75th Ranger Regiment, and well, that bonded you two differently. Those two months on the home base in Washington is where the both of you fell in love, whatever that meant for two active duty Rangers. After those 2 months, they shipped you out to your tour assignment, where things got dark. 

You stood there, getting lost in your thoughts as your brain wrapped itself around a new set of memories, ones that were heavy and hard to even think of. The memories of being on combat duty, seeing things that were burned in your mind as a souvenir of your two tours, and the one that constantly replayed in your head. The memory of being dishonorably discharged because you refused to follow orders. Before you could think further on it, you jumped at the sound of your dog barking. Your eyes moved to the driveway, the sound of the gravel crunching was mumbled under the music and the rain but it was still prevalent. The rain distorted the view out of the window, but you could see the black town car rolling down your driveway, which was otherwise empty. You lived easily 30 minutes from town or any person, neighbor, or establishment, and that was purposeful. When you got discharged, Gilly got sent backshortly after on leave with you for a week. The two of you were already married but had no place to call home and with you being done with the military, it was time to set down roots. Roots that wouldn’t push you into a PTSD fit constantly, you liked being off the beaten path, you liked being unbothered, on your own. On your own. Those three words instantly meant something completely different now as you stared at the black car in the driveway. Everyone knew the black town car pulling up, unexpected, to the home was the news. The news no one wanted to get, but being deployed yourself prepared you for it in a way that explained the solitude in your heart and lack of panic. You moved away from the window before anyone exited the car, you took the few minutes you knew you had before someone rang the bell to kneel down and be eye to eye with your pup. 

“I wish you were going to understand what was about to happen, buddy.” Your hand scratched behind his ears. You saw his nose wiggle as he sniffed the air, and he let out a little whine while looking at you. 

You let out a sigh, and closed your eyes. That’s when the doorbell rang. As your dog ran to the door, you knelt there for 30 more seconds, preparing yourself mentally to hear the news. 

The words rattled in your brain before anyone even said them to you, it was your brain's way of preparing you before you got up to answer the door. The commandant of the Army Rangers 75th Regiment and Second Battalion has entrusted me to express his deepest regrets that your husband, Gilberto Lopez, was killed in action. It was then that you realized you’d find out when and how, and that’s when you held your breath. It’d affect you differently, because you knew the logistics of things, how to read between the lines of what was told to you. Before another thought filled your head, you were standing up and making your way to the door and opening it wide. 

Immediately your dog was out the door whining and jumping on the person in front of you. You thought you felt your breath hitch, I mean you were seeing a dead man, or what you convinced yourself in the last 5 minutes was a dead man, standing in front of you but you were frozen, until he spoke.

“Hey buddy boy, I missed you, yea, hello.” He spoke to the dog, his backpack still on but the other bag was discarded to his right as he let your dog greet him joyfully. “You been takin’ care of our girl, right?” He said as he stood back up and you felt the breath you were holding release and suddenly you were launching into his arms. 

He let out a woah mixed in between a chuckle as he steadied himself and wrapped his arms around you to embrace you back. You both hugged for what felt like eternity, eventually he moved both of you into the house to avoid getting anymore wet from the rain. You still had your hands wrapped around his neck, your heads were next to each other when he whispered something to you.  

“What happened? I’m gone for a few months and you got that country shit playing?” 

When the laugh left your mouth it’s when you realized you were crying. 

“Hey, you’re not allowed to say that when it’s our song.” You pulled away so you could look at him now.

“See, country music’s got you crying.” His thumb moved to wipe your tears away, the smile on his face was big, he was happy to be home, happy to not be thinking about everything– anything. 

“I thought you were dead.” You said as his hands cupped your face. 

“I’m surprised I’m not.” His face hardened almost immediately as he shifted to talk to you seriously. 

“You back for good?” Staring into his eyes, you looked for an answer, but were only coming up with pain and exhaustion. 

“I’m back for good.” He nodded and moved to place his backpack down.

“It’s hard being home.” You said, hating to break the moment but you knew it was inevitable to talk about. 

“It’s hard being deployed.” Gilly answered.  

You looked into his eyes again, it was obvious to you that they were eyes that had seen a lot. You knew that since your eyes looked the same when you were sent home. The difference between him and you was he was there longer, whatever happened when you weren’t there was going to haunt him.

“Back for good.” You repeated his statement, trying to wrap your brain around what that meant, what you both were in store for but you were quickly interrupted by a kiss. 

As your eyes closed, you melted into the touch. His lips on yours brought you back in time, to your first kiss, your wedding day, then the day you were sent home, saying goodbye to him. But now he was home, and he was kissing you hello. 

“You and me, wild and free.” He said the lyrics from the song that brought you two here as he rested his forehead on yours. 

“I thought you hated country music.” 

There was a time before the MC and before adulthood had actually hit Gilly where he worked at a mall in his hometown of San Diego, California. Among those times and the present, there was always a constant and that was you. You had met at the mall and you were the one that showed him around the store that you guys worked at since he was the newbie at the job so as soon as lunch had come around, the two of you walked to the food court and continued to talk and hit it off and quickly became more than just coworkers and friends. The young love that had blossomed and felt like much more than young love had been cut short as Gilly had wanted to move to Santo Padre and be a part of the MC there and you wanted to go to college and become a lawyer for the people that couldn’t afford a fancy lawyer.

As time passed, the both of you had talked about each other to your closest friends. Gilly to Angel and Coco and you to yours. The both of you thought of the other as the one that got away. There was something about you to him that made you the only person in the world to him, from you supporting him through every decision he has made to even going out of your way to make sure he had everything and taken care of everything. 

Years later, the two of you still drifted your minds to each other, wondering if the other had a significant other and kids like they talked about. It wasn’t until you had an opportunity to move to Santo Padre and work for the law firm there so you quickly agreed and moved as fast as you could. It took a couple weeks until you were fully settled into your new house and environment and didn’t have to go to work until the next week so you decided to go to the only carniceria to pick up stuff for dinner since you were wanting something to do with steak.

When you were about to go up to the door, you saw a glimpse of a Harley in the front and you immediately thought of the big bear that had first captured your heart. It seemed like only a second while you were staring at the motorcycle only for it to be five minutes of you staring until a throat cleared next to you. You jumped and turned to the source of the noise, seeing a cute tall slim man with a beard.

“See something you like, querida?” Angel smirked.

“Oh! Is this your bike? Sorry for staring too long, just reminds me of somebody,” you smiled with a red cheeks.

“This one isn’t mine. Mine is right,” he pointed at the one two spots away, “there. This one is my brother’s,”

“Oh,” you softly smiled, “that’s cool. Well, I gotta go pick up some meat for dinner. See you later, I guess,”

You turned and entered the carniceria and smiled at the older man behind the counter before ordering while Angel quickly pulled Gilly back to his bike after he exited the panaderia with a concha.

“What?” Gilly asked after taking a bite of the concha.

“Dude, this chick just checked out your bike. She was hot with these curved like no other,” Angel gripped his chest.

Gilly rolled his eyes until the door of the carniceria opened and you came into his view as his jaw dropped, “(Y/N)?”

You turned and saw the familiar face that you had first loved, mabe even still do, “Gilly? Oh, my God! How are you? It’s been, what, years now?!” you quickly set down your meat and wrapped your arms around his neck for a hug before pulling away, “wait, do I have to worry about an angry wife or girlfriend that might beat me up?”

Gilly laughed, “Nah. Do I got a angry boyfriend or husband to worry about?”

“Boy, no,” you rolled your eyes with a laugh, “been single for a while, unfortunately,”

“Wait, this is the (Y/N)??” the man that stopped you outside asked, “well, shit, I didn’t think you existed. I’m Angel,” Angel reached his hand out for a handshake that you gladly shook, “well, mano. I gotta go to the yard, I’ll see you later,”

Gilly nodded before turning to you, “what are you doing here? Didn’t you go to school to become a lawyer?”

“Yes, sir. I got a job out here that offered and I immediately took it. Assuming you made it to the MC with the kutte. I’m proud of you, bear,” you smiled.

“Hey, ummm, do you wanna go on a date? You know, catch up and all that,” Gilly smiled.

“Yeah! Pull through at my place, I’ll make dinner and we can watch movies or something,” You grabbed a spare pen that you always tended to carry around just in case to write on his forearm, “this is my address so come at 7,” you gathered up all your courage and kissed his cheek before grabbing your meat that you ordered and rushed to your car to go home.

Fast forward, you guys have been dating for 4 months before Gilly had taken you to meet the MC that he considered his family since he already met your family and they loved him since the beginning. The moment you walked through the door, everybody had come up to you and made you feel welcomed with smiles and questions on how you met and how you could stay with the person. Unfortunately, Vicki’s girls were there so whenever you left to get something some would flock to Gilly, but he would wave them off and wait for you. Girls would give you glares and think that you were barely there and managed to get one of them.

“You know, he’s gonna leave you so he can mess with us,” one of them came up to you.

You chuckled, “girl, do you know our story? We’ve known each other way before the MC and way before you guys. I been there through it all so you can think what you want, but I’m not here for that,” you walked back to Gilly and sat on his lap giving him a huge kiss on the lips, laying your arm around his shoulders.

“Saw you talking to them. I’m glad to see that you can stick up for me and you to these sucias,” Gilly winked, resting his hand on your thigh, “I love you,”