#genius really

back from hospital btw ✌️ they treated me so badly I actually feel safer where I was trying to escape by going to hospital

i faked my cat stepping on my keyboard and called a friend of mine twice while he was asleep to make him wake up because he pissed me and my other friend off

Koh the Face Stealer from Avatar: the Last Airbender is the scariest, most original monster out there. 

the problem with cctv is it is annoying (especially when it comes to storage) but it does saves you when someone tries to rob your bar and you already have a debit of 3k

When the chronic pains leave you feeling like you were hit by a train and someone recommends “floating in water” as a viable solution

The Loch Ness monster is a kelpie that lost a bet, you cannot change my mind.