#gaslighter

If you are in a relationship here are some step by steps a lot of gaslighters and manipulators will do in order to cage you.

First few months they are kind, sweet, funny, seem genuinely good to you.

They get to the point where you move in together, this is where they slowly tip the scale.

First its small things commenta on som behavior you have around your friends, commenta on your friends.

"I don't remember who but someone said you look kinda fat. I don't care about what they said."

"I like so and so but you act kinda different around them."

"It's not that I hate your friends I get along with them, one of them said they didn't like your hair cut though. They said you look sick with short hair. I kind of agree."

Deflecting the issues they have with you on to others. "Everyone said your clothes are too revealing."

They keep going till your confidence is shot and you aren't so sure about your friends. They might not cut your friends off, they might just cause you and your friends to argue, creating miscommunications.

If you start to always argue with a friend try spending time with them without your partner and see if you still argue as much.

If you find yourself constantly defending your partners behaviors you're likely being isolated through your partner creating situations that might seem like they aren't in the wrong or they couldn't be that bad everyone else just doesn't know them like you do.

Do not let someone use politics or ableism to deny your point of view. Ask friends or family or a therapist their opinion on exact wording your partner has used to distinguish if you are being falsely called a bigot to make you irrationally disregard your own experience.

Note almost all of this happens within 2 years, the final few months of the 2 year mark is usually when you notice you don't have friends other than those who argue with you constantly.

FRIENDS WHO THINK YOUR FRIEND IS BEING MANIPULATED

Ask to spend more time with your friends one on one, make sure your friends has a support network so they know they can always leave their situation in an emergency.

I’m always wrong The sky is orange, not blue. I can’t apologize It means you’re mad JUDGMENT Not from you, from me you always said Always worth a fight

You don’t get angry Who never gets angry? FLAWLESS You don’t need forgiveness You’re never wrong.

Leaving your dishes to wash But I never could clean fast enough So lazy, just like dad I cleaned the trash off your floor I thought you were stressed And needed help PRIVACY INVASION “You’re finished,” you said EVICTION As you invaded my space “Kowai,” I simply said “You think I’m scared?” “No” Why couldn’t you leave me alone? Back against the wall I was just cleaning the bathroom

Told mom you’re scared After I cleaned your white cabinets CLOROX The mentally ill are so horrifying

Crazy mini-barbie VOODOO DOLL in your room No head No hands No feet Widdled down to nothing Thrown at your walls Why do you stab its breasts? Do you think of me?

You stole my medication Do you like Xanax? Are you having seizures again? Not worth a trip to the doctor I’ve had tons

You thought that I deserved the ax? Constant wellness checks Police visiting the house Throwing shit at the walls Where do you get off?

I slapped you Paranoid you stole my Seroquel So you called the cops Always shaking it in my face “Did you take your medicine?” Do I bother you? Must be a lack of ANTI-PSYCHOTIC The pills I always take Despite the harmful side effects

I was just a sister A babysitter I treated you kindly and with respect

I wish I never moved in with you TIME FOR EVICTION Time to be homeless Then wouldn’t let me pack TIME TO ARGUE Time to intimidate Time to scream

You’re wealthy It means you’re better than me PERFECT But not healthy Your mental state horrifies me Your vibes make me sick I wish I never moved in with you I’m glad you had me arrested I’m glad they took me away

I thought you might be a serial killer No, just a sociopath? Thought you might kill me at night I can hear your belt “He’s your brother. He wouldn’t do that.” replies mom I’m the one who is sick I’m the one who needs therapy I’m the one who is flawed.