#friendzonepod

This is where I’ll be listing Fran’s Wellness Segments. It will be updated regularly. Any specific products/stores mentioned will be linked :)

Ep. 1: It’s Ok to Log Off  

Being the first episode, Fran starts us off easy with a loving suggestion to take a social media break. At the time of this recording, “Twitterless Assante” was reaping the benefits of taking mindless twitter scrolling out of his life for some time.

Ep. 2: Family Matters  

This is where we start digging in and doing the work. Here, Fran asks us to look within to resolve family disputes that have gone unchecked. Have the talks that you have been avoiding, even if it feels uncomfortable. Remember to come from a place of compassion when approaching loved ones, and to not take anything personally. Which is a theme throughout many of the early episodes, as it’s the 2nd agreement in The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz, one of the many books Fran has suggested.

Ep. 3: Take 5  

Work on building and maintaining a healthy morning routine. This helps set the tone of the day. By leaving our phone out of this part of the day, we can avoid things like waking up to a long, angry text or some other drama  and letting that guide how the rest of day goes. Basically, set the tone of your day before taking in information from anyone else. 

Ep. 4: Surrender 

Meditate, meditate, meditate. 

Osho books are great for learning more about quieting the mind, as recommended by Fran. Sadhguru is another great teacher who I look to for insight on meditation, mindfulness, parenting, and just life in general. He has a channel on YouTube with tons of videos. Fran also recommends trying Mala beads to assist with meditation, or maybe journaling afterwards. She really just stresses the importance of beginning a meditation practice, without fear of doing it “right” or “wrong”.

Ep. 5: Even Martha Went to Jail  

No clear-cut Wellness Segment for this week, but the main gist of things was: create what you want, what feels good for you. Critics will appear for everyone, no matter how great they are, so do you. Don’t keep yourself from creating things because of fear of how others will receive it.

Ep. 6: Tacos & Quickweave 

In your journal, dissect the relationship you are in. Asking questions like, “Why are you with this person? Who are you *really* doing this relationship for?”   For singles, ask questions like, “What am I *really* looking for, in a person? How do I want to feel when I’m with them? How do I want to show up in their lives? How do I want them to show up in my life?” For those resistant to relationships, ask yourself why and really work through it to get those answers that you seek. ~meditate, meditate, meditate ~

Ep. 7: The Choir & The Competition Are Out 

Parents: Sit with our children and start asking them questions about their interests. Fran shares how she was impacted by her mom not being more encouraging about her becoming a singer, so she wants us to know how important it is to truly listen when our kids ask to pursue new things, even if it isn’t exactly what we pictured for them. 

For everyone, even those who don’t have children or maybe they aren’t quite at the age to start discussing these things: we were all a child at some point. Many people can benefit from asking ourselves if the profession we are in is for you, or if you were just trying to please our own parents. It’s never too late to begin learning more about anything that excites you.

Ep. 8: Fitness Regine Hunter  

(I’m pretty sure they purposely didn’t spell it “regime” because of the difficulty for many in pronouncing the word. lmao)

In this episode, Fran speaks on the importance of holistic health and wellbeing, sharing how much it has shaped who she is and improved her life. She wants us to really sit with ourselves and think about the things we want to work on. Ask, “What can I do to ensure that I’m being the most beautiful *me* possible?” From skin and hair care, to diet, to fitness, to the way we talk to ourselves or others. All the little things that make up holistic living. No quick fixes! We’re here to werrrrrrk, hunty. 

“Forget the internet for a second. Forget what the Instagram models look like, we’re talking about YOU...” - Fran the MF Goat.  

Implement a fitness regime that works for you. Maybe it’s part of your morning routine, maybe it’s an after dinner thing; everyone gets to choose what is best for them and that’s part of the beauty of this life. :) Try a few things and see what works. There is an emphasis on the importance of starting slow, allowing your mind and body to get used to new activity. Fran started off with walking, increasing her distance over time, and then turned that into jogging when it felt right for her. Blogilates and Yoga With Adriene are YouTube channels she mentions here. I have been hooked to yoga ever since trying a few videos from  Adriene. Yoga by Biola is another great channel to check out. Biola has this video, “Restorative Yoga for Collective Trauma”, which I love. I learned of her from The Friend Zone earlier in 2020. 

Skin and Hair: Check out Frans YouTube channel to see all the informative videos she has on all-natural beauty and health tips. Personally, I really like Naptural85 for hair videos as my curl pattern is very similar to hers. Click around on suggested videos to find the ones that speak to you. 

Ep. 9: Don’t Forget the Feet  

OIL UP! From head-to-toe. Get that moisture. Especially in these colder months. Hands, feet, nails, toenails...literally everywhere. Dustin cannot get over the importance of the feet. Fran says this aztec healing clay is great for dry, cracked feet, and she hinted at its ability to fix some facial skin woes as well. Extra Fran tip: put a small amount of oil on your nail beds before painting them. This protects the skin and promotes nail growth. I tried this myself and it’s a game changer in my nail health! They used to get cracks in them once they start getting to a certain length, but if i keep them oiled up, they are smooth as precious little stones. :) 

Ep. 10: A$AP Shirley Caesar  

This episode reminds us that finances, too, can impact our total feeling of well-being. The Friends all want us to get our finances in order, taking the tiniest of baby steps, if needed. Fran’s 3 things to cut back on: 

Eating Out

Online Shopping

Places like Target, where you go for 1 thing and leave with a full cart.

Making these sacrifices adds up. The goal is that eventually, any big things that are weighing on our mental due to finances can more easily be dealt with.

Ep. 11: And I’m Telling You, I’m NOT Going!

It’s all about skin-care in this wellness segment! Starting with what goes into your body, and ending with what goes on your body. First off: DRINK LOTS OF WATER! This not only promotes healthy skin but as we all know, it’s just good for the body in general. The body runs nice and smoothly when it’s hydrated from the inside-out. 

If you need to cut down on your caffeine intake (I’m right there with ya), Fran suggested Yerba Mate. It’s a natural source of caffeine and much cleaner than what comes in other energy drinks. I must say, I feel like the naturally occurring caffeine just hits different. I was hyyype the first few times I got a Yerba Mate instead of my usual orange Red Bull! Energy drink isn’t the only form to get your Yerba fix, thankfully. It’s sold as a loose leaf tea, or in bagged tea as well. I LOVE coffee though, and I am not giving that up so easy. I find that bringing mindfulness to my habits with it, helps me to not consume too much.

Now, for the outside of the body: washing and moisturizing daily is imperative. This may be obvious to some, but it can also feel difficult for those with a really busy schedule. I know for me, as a mom, there has been many times when I only had one chance to take a shower on a given day, and if I didn’t take it, I was always sorry. Or I would take a rushed, half-effort shower and get dressed immediately after without oil, lotion, anything. Having a routine in place for daily washing and moisturizing (that works with my sporadic life) helps me make sure it won’t get missed. Again, as with episode 9, OIL UP! Coconut oil is a great choice, but my skin just drinks it up like water. Sesame oil is a nice alternative because it’s a bit thicker. It was hard for me to get used to smelling like a huge sesame seed though, not gonna lie. But there are so many different oils and butters out there to love our bodies with, just use some trial and error to find which one(s) work best for you.

Last thing: Bedding. Change it at least once a week. Get on the silk pillowcase train! Or if you real fancy, like Fran, get you a full-on silk sheet set. Cotton sheets soak up all the moisture from our skin that we work so hard and lovingly on.

Ep. 12: The Shut Down Mixtape

House cleaning time! Clean your fridge, clean your closets, clean your desk drawers. Clean everything! Trying to especially bring focus to areas that are often overlooked in your regular daily cleaning. By doing this, we clear out old energy, removing heaviness from our homes that we may not even realize is there. I personally can vouch that this helps with anxiety and even lifts my depression symptoms as well. It feels good when the space I live in looks and smells nice, so taking the effort is more than worthwhile.

Ep. 13: Oh God…

Get in touch with what religion/spirituality mean to YOU. This one was hard for me because I wasn’t raised with much knowledge of (or respect for, sadly) religion. As I grew, I became super interested in the various religions and how they affect the lives of others - good or bad. I’ve now learned to adapt my own spiritual practices that support me and help me get by. And this is life changing.

Ep. 14: Say It Like You Mean It

Here, we are instructed to find out what our individual love language is. This comes from the book The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman. The 5 Love Languages are: 

Quality Time

Acts of Service

Receiving Gifts

Words of Affirmation

Physical Touch

You may already have an idea of what your primary love language is, but you can get some more information on that by reading the book or by taking quizzes on the book’s website. Knowing your love language, as a single, can help you define what you need from a partner. As someone in a relationship, it can help both partners learn how to best make sure everyone knows they are loved and valued. 

Ep. 15: Yo Mama

Scalp Care for Winter Weather!

½ Cup Olive Oil ~ Seals in moisture

2 Tbsp. Honey (Fran uses Raw honey) ~ Creates pretty shine

½ Cup Coconut Milk ~ Adds protein

½ an Avocado ~ Healthy fat

½ a Banana ~ Softens hair

Blend all ingredients into a creamy conditioner, which should come out a nice light greenish color. 

I keep forgetting coconut milk at the store or else I’d have been tried this one, smh *face palm* But I will edit to add my review after I finally do this. :) 

Ep. 16: Non Profit & Chill

This episode had no segments, but we can still gain a wellness tip from it. Recorded right after Fran returned from a trip to Africa, she had a ton of insight to share on why it’s so important to be an ethical consumer. This episode was a great one to re-listen to as it reminded me that I am reading labels and the “about” pages on brand’s websites for a valid reason that is important to me, not just following trends. Dang imposter syndrome, always trying to step in and ruin everything (shoutout to the Friend Zone for teaching me about that as well, in a later episode.)

Fair Trade Errything !!!

Ep. 17: There’s A Song For That

No wellness segment this week, per say, but again I’ll summarize the episode to make it wellness for us all. The friends basically dode over their favorite break-up songs, from the deepest of soul, to the pettiest of rap songs. Many genres listed, and many bangers. This episode is a great listen for those going through a breakup, or even if you’re a big fan of the episodes where the Friends just let loose and have fun.

Ep. 18: Don’t You Go To Work?

Inspired by Assante and his newly purchased stones, which he is carrying safely in his pocket, Fran suggested that us listeners get in on the magic as well by getting our own stones. Starting with Citrine. This stone is a light orange color, and can be found online or in local crystal stores in most cities. Often referred to as “the merchants stone”, Citrine is believed to attract success. Fran offered the idea of laying it on some money, because she did it and got a random check in the mail soon after...And I kid you not - I did it, and the saaame thing happened to me. I was shook and beyond grateful!

Other stones mentioned here are Lapis Lazuli and Black Tourmaline. Lapis is a pretty, royal blue shade, usually with gold flakes in it. Lapis is known as the “communication stone”. Black Tourmaline is, you guessed it, black, and often found in shiny pieces. Fran says she keeps one of these by her bedside to absorb negative thoughts; letting it cleanse her energy before bed.

Stores mentioned on this episode: Rock Star, and Namaste shop. Both New York based but have online shopping available. Personally, and this is gonna sound real woo-woo, but I prefer picking out stones in person because then I can actually feed off of their energy to pick the right one for me. Those living in a small town, there is probably a crystal shop not too far away.

Ep. 19: The Friend Zone & The Read Mash Up Pt. 1

Wellness this week: be messy and silly with your friends. For me, I don’t currently have any real life friends to hang out with, plus COVID, so my family gets to enjoy all my silly mess. Life just cannot be lived being serious 100% of the time!

Ep. 20: 2015, I’ma Let You Finish, But 2016…

I loved this episode because it brings us back to our journals. Fran asks the guys and us listeners to reflect on two simple, but powerful questions to answer at the end of each year:

What are 3 things you discovered about yourself this year that you love? Things that you feel will propel you into the next year, as a person, career-wise, and as a whole. Write freely about how you plan on maintaining and evolving.