head is spinning, stomach is sick
i should talk to a friend
but i can't get out of bed
***
walter 'keys' mckey x fem!reader
your best friend Keys hates your new boyfriend even though you're convinced you're in love with him, unable to see all his red flags and wondering why you feel so bad all the time. When he finally shows you his true colours, Keys is there for you
warnings: emotionally toxic boyfriends, swearing, slight angst, making out but nothing explicit, friends to lovers, keys is soft but also not afraid to defend his best friend
part of the 200 follower celebration
***
“Oh, come on. Do you not see how wrong you are right now?” You burst out with laughter, leaning back against the couch cushions. Your best friend, Keys, shook his head at you in indignation, a bright smile on his face.
“I’m completely right in this scenario. I could absolutely fit the rest of this popcorn in my mouth, it wouldn’t even be a challenge.”
“Go on then, prove yourself.” You said as you playfully chucked a piece of popcorn in his direction. Keys gave you a mortally offended look before picking up the bowl. You immediately stopped him. “Wait, no. Stop.”
“Oh, are you finally ready to concede?”
“No, you idiot. I just don’t want to see my best friend go out by shovelling a load of popcorn in his mouth.” You couldn’t help but laugh again. “Imagine me having to give that eulogy at your funeral.”
“Hey, what a way to go out, though.” Keys pointed out, revelling in the way your face lit up with laughter. He absolutely loved making you laugh, and it mattered to him more than ever these days. It wasn’t often that he saw you like this anymore, so joyful and carefree. Letting your hair down like this didn’t come naturally to you anymore and it broke his heart a little.
As if on cue, your phone buzzed on the coffee table and immediately you tensed up, grabbing it quickly and reading the text that had just come through. Keys gazed at you intently as you frowned slightly, eyes scanning the screen again before you sighed. “I’m sorry, Keys.”
“You’re leaving already?” He didn’t need you to tell him, he already knew what was coming. The two of you had been doing this dance for a while now. “I thought we were hanging out tonight, I haven’t seen you properly for ages.”
“I know, it’s just…Alex got off work early and he wants me to come home. He’s my boyfriend, you know. You understand, right?”
Keys really didn’t understand. He’d been your best friend for years, seen you go through the motions plenty of times, but he’d never seen you retreat into yourself like you had done since you began dating Alex. As much as Keys loved you, he had to admit that he absolutely hated your boyfriend. He saw the way you reacted where he was concerned, too afraid of not texting him back fast enough, bailing on plans last minute under the guise of not feeling well, the way you were on the edge of your seat all the time.
Tonight had been the first time in ages that he’d seen you entirely relaxed, able to just be yourself as you were safe in the knowledge that Alex was busy with work. But now, once again, it was about him and Keys couldn’t hide his real feelings as he sighed.
“Keys,” you pleaded with him. “Don’t be like that, please.”
“I’m sorry, that wasn’t aimed at you.” He assured you. “It’s just…can’t he survive one evening without you?”
“He’s my boyfriend.” You told him. “He needs me.”
“And I don’t? I’m your best friend, but lately it feels like I need to schedule weeks in advance just to see you for ten minutes. I hate it.”
You reached out and took his hand, squeezing it gently which always made him soften. “I’m sorry, I know I haven’t been the greatest friend recently. We can hang out next week, I promise. I’ll be all yours then. I really want to give this thing with Alex a try, I think I might love him.”
Keys wanted to try and shake some sense into you, make you see the effect this guy was having on you. But you claimed you were in love with him, and so he felt as though he had to take a noble step back and let things take their natural course, no matter how much it was killing him. He knew how much better you deserved, you deserved someone who loved you with their whole heart and let you be you, didn’t just care about what you could do for them. Was he possibly thinking about anyone in particular, it was very likely.
He’d known for a while that the feelings he had for you were real. But he was just your best friend, there was nothing more he could do.
“Alright, I get it.” He conceded. “But you promise I can see you next week?”
“I swear.” You nodded. “And next time you’ll have my full undivided attention.”
He couldn’t help but smile. “That does sound nice.”
“So you’ll forgive me if I take off now?”
Keys could never have stayed mad at you for very long, the way you tilted your head and smiled at him with those eyes was his absolute downfall. “I forgive you.”
“Thank you.” You sat forward and pulled him into a hug, one that he immediately reciprocated. He wrapped his arms around you tightly, not wanting to let you go too soon. Having you in his arms just felt right, and it baffled him how you couldn’t see it. Still there you went, pulling away from him and punching him lightly on the shoulder, the ultimate friendzone. “I’ll see you later, loser.”
Just like that you were standing up and leaving his apartment. The moment he heard the door shut behind you, Keys sank into the cushions and placed his head in his hands, groaning loudly. What a god-damn fucking idiot he was letting you leave. The place felt so much emptier without you in it.
He wasn’t sure how much more of this he could take. And he only worried about you even more.
**
“Hey, baby.” You called out as you walked into Alex’s apartment, slipping off your shoes and wandering into the living room. The place was eerily quiet which only set you on edge more. Keys’ apartment was never quiet, there was always some kind of life going on. Here it was like a funeral was going on, and it made you shiver.
Alex was sitting in his armchair when you came in, beer in hand as he stared at the television screen. As you made your way over to him, he finally acknowledged you as you leaned down to kiss him on the cheek. “Where were you?” He asked gruffly.
“Oh, I was just at a friend’s house.” You responded breezily. “How was work?”
“Which friend?” He persisted, completely ignoring your question. It was on his terms, always. You sighed.
“Does it matter?”
“I was upset when I came home from a long day at work and you weren’t here.” He told you. “Who was more important to you than me?”
He wasn’t going to let this go and you knew it. Easier to just go along with it. “I was just with Keys.” You told him. “I haven’t seen him in so long, we were just catching up. Not a big deal.”
Alex’s jaw clenched slightly. “I’ll never understand why your best friend has to be a guy. Why can’t I be the only guy in your life?”
“Alex, Keys is my oldest and best friend. He means a lot to me, you know that. But we’re just friends, always have been. Can we please not have this fight again?”
For a minute, you thought he was going to keep arguing but thankfully he decided to drop it. “Whatever. You want to watch a movie?”
“Sure, I’d love to.” You smiled. “Action or comedy?”
“Action, always action, babe.” He replied, finally lightening up. You relaxed into the couch as he pressed play on the TV, content in the fact that he’d dropped the subject. You hoped against hope that was the end of it, but deep down you knew that things were never that straightforward.
You silently wished Keys were here right now. He’d take your hand, rub circles into the back with his thumb and all the stress would just dissipate. But he wasn’t here, and even so he wasn’t your boyfriend. This was what you had chosen and you were determined to make it work
How hard could it be, right?
**
You lay in bed that very next week, staring at the ceiling and wondering what was wrong with you. It was late afternoon and Alex had left already, somehow the empty space next to you didn’t feel empty or cold. It was actually a relief to finally have some space. That wasn’t the way it was supposed to be, was it? You loved Alex, when it was good with him it was really good. You felt happy. But then something would happen, his mood would change and your head would start spinning. Nothing felt right, you didn’t feel like yourself anymore. It made you feel like the biggest idiot, why couldn’t you just make this work?
The sound of your phone ringing on the night stand startled you from your thoughts, and you reached over to check it. It was Keys. Of course it was, it was like your best friend had a sixth sense as to when you needed him. You felt your spirits lift as you answered.
“Hey, you.” A smile crept onto your face.
“Hey, I was just calling to check in.” He told you. “Are you still coming over tonight, I bought your favourite chips.”
“You’re amazing.” You told him, and if you could have been there to see the slight blush that crept up his face when you said it, you never would have believed it. A glance to your right had your mood dimming a little. “I should check with Alex.”
Keys shook his head on the other end, hating the fact that you felt the need to ask permission to see him. “Is he there right now?”
“No, he’s out at the moment. Went to grab some beers with his workmates.”
Keys sighed. “You do see the hypocrisy here, right? I bet he didn’t ask you if he could go out.”
“Well, no.” You said, considering his words. “He didn’t. Fuck, you’re right. He goes out with his friends all the time, why can’t I do the same?”
“That’s what I’m saying, you can.” Keys assured you. “I can come round and meet you if you like?”
“No, it’s OK.” You said quickly. “I’ll come round there.” Knowing full well that if Alex came home and found Keys in his apartment that would only make things worse. Give me an hour, I’ll be there.”
“I can’t wait.” Keys told you honestly. “You know how much I miss you?”
Now it was your turn to get a little flustered, feeling a flutter of butterflies upon hearing that. Keys never made you feel stupid or insecure, in fact you probably felt safer around him than anyone else in your life. It felt right with him, and somehow you knew that going over and seeing him would make you feel ten times better.
You climbed out of bed and began to get ready, already feeling a little lighter.
**
An hour later, you were just about to walk out the door when you realised you didn’t have your keys. Dashing into your bedroom to grab them from the dresser, your stomach sank suddenly when you heard the door open and shut loudly, the sounds of your boyfriend coming into the apartment.
“Baby, I’m home.” He called loudly. “Where are you?”
“Shit.” You muttered to yourself, clutching your keys tightly and slowly making your way out into the living room. Alex turned around when he heard you come in, swaying slightly as he grinned at you. Then his eyes took in the pretty outfit you were wearing, the bag slung over your shoulder and the keys in your hand. His expression turned sour.
“Where the fuck are you going?”
You sighed, really not in the mood to do this tonight. All you wanted was to get to Keys’ and just hang out with him. “Alex, I’m going out to see a friend. I’ll be home later, OK?” You made to leave but he side-stepped, blocking your way.
“Which friend?”
“It doesn’t matter.”
“You’re going to see him again, aren’t you?” He all but spat out. “Jesus, what is with that guy? Do you like him better than me or something?”
“Alex, you’ve been out all day with your friends and I haven’t complained once. I’m just going to see Keys for a few hours, I’m allowed to do that.”
“Why don’t you just say that you don’t really love me.” He responded. “I mean, because if you did you’d want to stay here with me, not go and be with him.”
“You know what? I don’t want to be with you right now. You’re drunk, and you’re being kind of mean to me right now. I’d rather speak to you tomorrow when you’ve sobered up.”
And that was the set-up to start the two of you arguing, again. Alex yelling about how you should be faithful to him, you begging him to see things from your perspective. This was the way it always went with the two of you. In the beginning you really believed that you loved Alex and that he loved you. But this wasn’t love.
It was finally dawning on you. This wasn’t what you wanted. Wasn’t who you wanted.
**
Keys was sat on the couch in the middle of a gaming session, checking his phone every so often. You’d told him you would be there twenty minutes ago and he was trying not to panic. He’d already tried calling with no answer. It was possible you were just on the subway or something, not checking your phone but still he couldn’t help but worry. He always worried when it came to you.
After what felt like an eternity, he finally heard a knock on the door and practically sprinted over to answer it. A wave of relief washed over him when he saw you standing there, but it was quickly replaced with concern when he saw how you were shaking and tears were staining your face. His face softened.
“Honey, what happened?” He asked you, using the pet-name he only reserved for when he was trying to comfort you. “Are you OK?”
You began crying all over again, falling into his arms as he caught you and wrapped you up in a hug. “I’m sorry.” You sobbed.
“Hey.” He stroked your hair gently. “You don’t ever have to apologise to me, you know that. Come inside.”
He walked you into the apartment, sitting you down on the couch and keeping a hand on your shoulder. You subconsciously placed your hand on top of his, and his heart swelled a little. “Me and Alex had a huge fight.” You explained. “He didn’t want me to come and see you, and I got mad. And then he got mad. We basically just screamed at each other for half an hour until I couldn’t take it anymore, so I told him things were over and I just left.” Your bottom lip trembled. “I’m an idiot, I should have stayed. Should have worked things out with him.”
“No, you’re not an idiot.” Keys rubbed soothing circles into your shoulder. “You did exactly the right thing, he was never going to work things out. You know that, right?”
You wiped your face with your free hand. “He gets mad sometimes, but I feel like maybe I push him a little bit.”
“OK, no. Don’t do that.” Keys told you immediately. “Don’t start blaming yourself and making excuses for him, he doesn’t deserve that. He doesn’t deserve you.”
You sniffed. “What do you mean?”
Keys had spent the last few months keeping his real feelings bottled up for the sake of your friendship. The last thing he wanted to do was risk driving you away, and he knew the ground was delicate. But now he couldn’t find it in himself anymore. Seeing you sat there looking so sad was breaking his heart. Especially when he knew that someone like him could treat you so much better. And so it was that the dam broke and the truth came out like a tidal wave.
“Honey, you know I love you so much.” He began. “But I fucking hate that guy. He’s arrogant, he’s rude and he never treats you the way that you deserve. If he doesn’t see just how lucky he is to have you, then he’s the biggest fucking idiot on the planet. You deserve someone that worships the ground you walk on, someone who would do anything just to spend five minutes with you. You deserve better.”
His words had managed to make your crying stop as you processed everything he had just said. And as you looked back at him, you began to see him in a new light. Because everything he had just said, all the things you deserved were exactly the way he always treated you. With respect, and with love. And in that moment you realised that was what was wrong. Alex never loved you. But Keys did.
“I’m not talking about anyone specific, I just-“ He was cut of when you leaned in and pressed your lips to his, not wasting a single second more. Keys was shocked for a minute before he melted into the kiss, hand coming up to rest on your jaw. A low groan erupted from him and you took the opportunity to slip your tongue into his mouth, deepening the kiss. Keys wasted no time at all in pulling you onto his lap, hands settling softly on your waist. He’d dreamed about this with you for so long, he wasn’t about to let you go. You kissed until you were both out of breath, pulling away and resting your forehead against his.
“Are you sure about this?” He breathed. “You just broke up with him, I don’t want to push you.”
You smiled. “Keys, it feels right with you. I feel safe, and happy. I never feel like that with Alex. I want this, I want you.” Keys responded by cupping your cheek and pulling you into another kiss, this one short and sweet. “Can I stay here tonight?” You asked him.
Like you even needed to ask. “Of course you can. I’ll make the bed up for you.”
“Wait.” You said. “Can we just stay here? Will you stay with me?”
Keys would have stayed with you forever if you’d asked him to. Shifting the both of you gently, he adjusted himself so he was lying behind you, arms wrapped around you as he pulled you into him. You happily rested your head against his chest, feeling him press a soft kiss to your head.
“Get some sleep, honey. You’re safe here, I’ve got you.”
For the first time in ages, you felt yourself drift off to sleep with no worries or insecurities. Because you were with Keys, and you knew he would always keep you safe.
**
The next morning you were rudely awoken by someone hammering on the door, demanding to be let inside. You stirred softly and realised that Keys was still there, arm wrapped around as he’d drifted off to sleep as well. You would have been happy if it weren’t the insane racket right now.
Keys groaned in indignation as he ran a hand over his face, waking himself up. “What the fuck is all that noise?” He complained.
“I think someone’s at the door.” You stated the obvious. Keys slowly slid his arm from around you as he stood up.
“Wait there, OK. I’ll go see what’s going on.”
You nodded and watched him go, hearing him open the door and start talking to someone quietly. It didn’t stay quiet for long as the unmistakeable sound of your ex-boyfriend could be heard. “Where the fuck is she?”
“She doesn’t want to see you.” Keys told him angrily. “Now would you get out of here before you wake up the entire building.”
“Who the fuck do you think you are telling me what to do?” Alex argued back. “I’m here for my girlfriend, tell her she’s got two minutes.”
“She’s not your girlfriend anymore, man. Now leave before I call the cops.”
“Oh, I see. You were just waiting for the first opportunity to try and steal her away from me, weren’t you? You fucking asshole.”
You ran into the hallway, not wanting to hear him slate your best friend any further. “Alex, go home. It’s over between us, I don’t want to be with you anymore.”
Alex blinked at you in surprise. “You serious? After everything I did for you?” He took a step forward but Keys was faster, putting himself between you and Alex and gently pushing him backwards. There was no way he was letting this guy hurt you anymore. Alex looked furious for a minute before throwing his hands up. “Fine, you two deserve each other. She’s not worth it anyway.”
You saw Keys’ jaw clench at his words. “Get out.” Was all he said, and surprisingly Alex listened to him. He turned heel and stormed away down the corridor, muttering angrily to himself. The second he was gone, you felt relief wash over you as Keys shut the door and turned back to you. “Are you alright?”
You wrapped your arms around his waist and buried your face in his chest, feeling everything wash over you at once. “Thank you.”
“For what?” He chuckled as he hugged you back.
“For sticking up for me, reminding me that I deserve to be treated well.”
“I’ll never stop reminding you of that. I promise.” He told you. And you knew he meant it.
**
Tags: @whispersoflost @cupofdjoplease @tenderlyuniquepatrol @oliviaharrington @veeweepeeknee @beesbotanicalwhispers @jamesdeerest @louisbelongstome28 @marie-the-muse @crescentwillow
