#forge fitzwilliam

vs.

"Me and the bad bitch I pulled by being autistic"

He has nothing to do except stare at the same four walls, chilled to the bone because it's always so fucking cold, with Holga as his only (if beloved) company, and the entire time he's wallowing in self-loathing and misery and grief, and his only thought is his daughter, his Kira, who he's left behind and he doesn't even know if she's okay, if Forge has kept his word of taking care of her--

So he thinks of her and composes a song that sums up all his love for her, his regret for leaving her behind, and his hope that she's alive and well without him.

Holga has never expressed anything more than a quiet hum of approval for his singing and composing; sure, he knows she enjoys when he sings, but he's never got any significant reaction from her before. The first time he sings the lullaby though, the first time he tries it out loud, he's so lost in the melody and the flow of it that he doesn't realize she's looking at him, tears streaming down her face silently, until he's finished. They don't speak of it; they both share the same pain and longing when it comes to their daughter.

And then the events of the movie happen, they save Neverwinter, they are acclaimed heroes but most importantly, their family is reunited.

Edgin will never again take for granted the time he has with his daughter. The first time she asks him to sing her to sleep he almost cries on the spot.

He does sing her to sleep. Common songs, sweet lullabies he's sang to her before, and slowly but surely her eyes start drifting and her eyelids become heavy.

When he's sure she's more than halfway asleep, only then does he sing her the lullaby he himself composed while imprisoned and thinking of her.

One day, he tells himself as he caresses her hair, spying Holga standing in the corner watching them with a sad smile on her face, one day he'll sing it to her while she's still awake.

(the song I thought about is "You Will Be Okay" from Helluva Boss. Imagining Edgin sing it to a sleepy Kira gave me a lot of feels and I will probably write a fic about this when I find the time and energy)