#fl3notes

dang it, teresa! i guess i’ll talk about first love last love here! 

i don’t know what possessed me to create this monster of a fic in two weeks, but it happened and i miss it so damn much. the past and present timelines interweaving definitely added to the original length, but i think it’s what allowed me to really dig deep into yoongi’s and reader’s personalities and characteristics. we got to see their past motivations and how those either changed or somewhat stayed the same in present time. it was so fun writing two different sides of yoongi, as well. but we just know the true origin of both past and present storylines was my greedy ass saying why not both blonde yoongi and dark-hair undercut yoongi??

when they talked through yoongi’s low motivation at school, it’s a conversation i wish i had during my early education days. if someone told me to just keep doing what i loved instead of what i thought was considered “normal,” i think i would’ve been living doing what i wanted to do. maybe this story flew out of my fingers because it took my true feelings about education and music and art in general and plastered them on the pages with no issues.

the hardest thing about writing FL3? slowly unveiling what the hell happened between them. it was somewhat difficult to not give too much away while at the same time keeping the weight of the event substantial enough for readers to stay invested! that was definitely a feat - one that i hope i achieved. 

and as for describing how the music sounded to the reader and the last performance scene: i definitely took experience from many orchestra concerts i’ve been to/been apart of and dug up emotions i experienced while listening to black swan for the first time. black swan was also the backbone/entire vision of the opening scene, as well. for yoongi’s piano playing, i thought of the pianist we had in my high school. he was a savant that memorized pieces after one look at the sheet music and one of the coolest people i’ve ever met. 

also, i’ve done this with both yoongi’s and hoseok’s stories so far: i made sure to incorporate a lot of their solo songs and some bts song titles somewhere in the fics LOL

OH, speaking of director’s cut: there was another scene with yoongi and reader going upstairs in the frat house with jk, but i decided that it messed with the flow of the story so i ended up taking it all out. the sexual tension between them was heavy in that scene, but i think what exists in the final draft is still.. enough ASDFSDJF. but 4k of the original first draft is now sitting in my pile of google doc scraps🥲

oh!! also, aspa is black and modeled after one of my irl friends😂 love them both sm