♪“I'm free, I'm free, I'm free, I'm free, I-”♪ [X]
One day, a few weeks before The Rescue, Val went for her typical morning run. And, while she was catching her breath for a moment, she had the idea to climb a nearby building and watch the sunrise.
In the past, she would have let the idea pass. It was too dangerous, she could see the sunrise perfectly fine out her apartment window if she just ran back. But something Jackie had told her over and over these past few months rang in her head – “Now you’re free of those corpo chains, you gotta learn to live a little, chica! You don’t gotta be so nervous all the time.”
So she did climb the building. It was actually not even all that difficult. And when she got to the top, just as the sun was cresting over the mountains in the distance, she has this epiphany. She doesn’t have to be little miss perfect anymore. She can’t earn her dead mother’s approval from beyond the grave. The people she loves, who love her, don’t give a shit about any of that bs and never have.
She’s FREE. From all of those expectations. And it’s wonderful, and terrifying, and there’s an odd sense of grief that comes with it. Grief over time she wasted focused on shit that didn’t matter. But we can only ever change the present, in hopes the future will turn out differently. So she vows to figure out what matters to her, and put her energy into that, instead of what she thinks others want her to do. (Which, as you know if you’ve ever struggled with anxiety/people-pleasing, is a big step.)
