Any world, any fandom, any originals, however you art or write or whatever!
Do what you can and have fun!
Hell if this reaches you on February 15th, it's not even too late to just hop on the wagon, however you choose.
Iâll be watching the tag #femslashfeb2026 , so make sure to use that in the first 5 tags if you want people to see.
Additionally, I discourage works of maturity or kink so that all ages and sex-repulse levels may participate in a safer space. They are not banned however, but I encourage you to find a kink challenge instead. No mature works are reblogged, but may still be found in the tag.
I discourage AI, but itâs not like I can ban you from participating in a personal challenge tumblr tag. At the very least tag it, so that those that don't want to view it can avoid it.
Collagers! You're somewhat off the hook on this one, I know pinterest is riddled and there's not always a tell. However writers and artists. You should all be aware of the ethics and controversy by now.
OTHER FemSlashFeb blogs, please please please use your own unique tags. If youâre participating in someone elseâs challenge, please donât use our tag. Which is again #femslashfeb2026
Thank you anyone coming back this year. And thank you to those that still check on this blog.
We will be announcing a discord soon so check back to the blog for that.
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An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Star Wars - All Media Types
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Fay the Jedi/Arla Fett
Characters: Arla Fett, Fay the Jedi (Star Wars), Jango Fett
Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Enemies to Lovers, Femslash February
Series: Part 5 of Fay prompts, Part 1 of Femslash February 26
Summary:
âYou can't do that,â the Mandalorian says, and Fay can feel the frazzled, tangled scrape of her emotions like gravel against her skin, too loud.
@loz-femslash-week Day 2: Admiration - Compliments
@femslashfeb Day 6: Smile & Day 7: Eyes
@miladydewintcr Femslash Feb Day 16: Dance
@fluffbruary Day 19: Dazzling
@monthlywritingchallenges February Tag Challenge: Mutual Pinning + Physical Touch
Dohna loves watching Zelda dance. The princess is mesmerizing, with her fluid body movements, her eyes shining, and her long hair whipping with each spin; her feet never stumble with the fast movements demanded by Gerudo dances.
Every touch is blinding, every dazzling smile burns through Dohnaâs chest, and the captain canât help but feel enchanted in the face of Zeldaâs passion. She canât control her eyes either, meeting Zeldaâs every time they meet in the twisting circle of moving bodies, partners switching faster than Dohna wishes.Â
She wants to linger around Zelda, to get lost in the company of the one who enraptures her. She craves to trail her fingers over strong arms, and brush the loose hairs near the back of Zeldaâs neck from where they fall out of her ponytail. To squeeze the princessâs waist as Zelda steps closer, to feel her warm breath on her neck, and to hold her hand and keep holding even when the dance is over. She burns for Zelda to keep touching her, to keep looking at her with those captivating hazel eyes, with wonder alighting them in a way that is dangerously alluring.Â
There is the urge to entangle their hands together as lovers do, the desire to feel the thrum of Zeldaâs pulse getting faster through her fingertips as they stand so close that Dohna could feel her rapid heartbeat as if they were one. She wants to lean over and whisper mindless words into Zeldaâs ears, compliments spilling through so the pink flush on Zelda can grow to the back of her neck and shoulders.
She dreams of Zelda leaning closer as well, lips lingering until one of them musters the courage to close the distance. She imagines how soft those lips would be, imagines if Zelda would taste of sweet hydromelon or if there would be hints of her cultureâs spices on her tongue. She pictures the way Zelda might sigh into her mouth, wonders if she will tilt her head, if she brings her hands up to cup Dohnaâs face or down to grip her waist to tug them closer and closer until thereâs no room to breathe.
Her wish ignites every time Zelda smiles her way, an unidentifiable twinkle in those gorgeous eyes that has Dohna thinking, âWhat if?âÂ
She yearns for so much it feels like a blaze of desire and impulses that she struggles to keep control of, longing intensifying with every lingering touch before they are forced apart by new dance partners.
Hooray for Valerie! She caught that thief purple handed!
Gifs of the Melody/Valerie hug scene from "The Sleeping Planet" for Day 12 of Femslash February 2026, "Yellow", since they have the matching yellow spacesuits in this show.
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Fandom: Fruits Basket
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warning: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Relationship: Honda Tohru/Sohma Isuzu
Summary: Rin learns how to dress up for herself, and then learn how to share it with Tohru.
[Femslash February 2026 â Day 3: Dressed Up]
Words: 7,834
AO3 | Ff.net
Notes: Happy Year of the Horse, especially to my favorite anime horse girl of all time!!! đŽđ€
This was written for Femslash February 2026 â Day 3: Dressed Up, from those prompts. I wanted to write a story about Rin since this is *her* year AND a story for FemFeb, and given Tohrin is still my second favorite ship from FB, that's how it ended up.
Rin's relationship to her body and appearance is fascinating to me and something I've always wanted to explore, so this was a good opportunity for it, at least a little bit.
Disclaimer that tbh Iâm reaaaallly not knowledgeable about fashion at all; to me Rin strikes me as a mix of punk/goth? But idk, mainstream media always mix up those two styles and I think itâs true of Fruits Basket as well.
I also absolutely haaate describing clothes because I think I'm really bad at it lol, so this was a bit of a challenge!
Like I said in the tags, this is a slight AU where it follows the series' main plot beats except that:
1. Rin & Haru don't get back together, and
2. Tohru & Kyo are close friends but they're not in love or dating.
I actually didnât want to involve Haru as much as I did in this, but itâs hard to follow Rinâs canon storyline without bringing in how important Haru is to her and their codependent relationship.
Honestly this is a (relatively) short one-shot so I havenât put much thought into how those details would alternate the plot and the characters exactly, and the boys donât really matter in this story anyway but I felt the need to explain that lol. I love Kyoru and Harurin btw, but their exclusion was needed for the sake of yuri. Hope you understand đ«Ąđ
Content Warnings: Nothing explicit but there are mentions of Rin's past physical child abuse and abandonment, and some exploration of her trauma/probable C-PTSD.
* * *
Isuzu Sohma didnât really care all that much about how she dressed as a child.
She didnât buy her clothes; her father did. She didnât choose what to put on in the morning; her mother did. And as a little girl, she had no issues with this.
She liked how her mother dressed her well enough. Colorful pretty dresses, cute tops with animals and heart patterns, flowery skirts and fluttering ribbons. Her mother was obsessed with making Rin look good in all circumstances; not overly so, so that it didnât seem like she was trying too hard, but proper enough that she could pass off as the daughter of a respectable, wealthy family.
Her mother would spend at least half an hour working on her every morning; sheâd stuck her in front of the mirror, brush her long hair delicately, straighten with care the clothes sheâd chosen, make sure her skin was glossy and her cheeks rosy. It made her feel like one of her dolls, sometimes, and a part of Rin now wondered if that had been on purpose. Her parents surely would have preferred for her to be a doll, because at least she wouldâve been much easier to manage and hid away.
Rin was never allowed to get out of the house looking any less than perfect.
And if she ever had the misfortune to get dirty or scratch herself, she was immediately punished and forcibly brought back home.
But at the time Rin didnât mind it all that much. It was when her family was still pretending to be normal and happy, and she liked the way she was dressed, even if she had no choice in the matter.
After all, she was always told what a cute little girl she was by everyone, and it made her feel proud. Made her feel loved.
When she met Haru and started to play with him, however, Rin noticed very quickly that he was different from her.
Haru had a mother a bit similar to her own; she cared a whole lot about appearances. But unlike Rinâs mother, she would let her son dress however he wished.
He could choose his own clothes, style his hair like he wanted. He could wear cargo pants and chain necklaces and torn up tank tops even though his parents didnât like it. He called it âpunk.â Rinâs mother was pretty judgmental about it, Rin could tell even as a child; she didnât like Haru, and always narrowed her eyes whenever she saw him. It was the same kind of hypercritical stare she would throw at women on the street wearing clothes she thought too ârevealing.â
Haru explained to Rin he was allowed to do this after getting angry at his mom about how she dressed him. So sheâd brought him to a clothing store the next day and told him that from now on he could take whatever he wanted. His parents werenât fond of how Haru dressed; they had been especially concerned he would get even more bullied at school, when he was already harassed because of his weird hair. But from his point of view, he would get bullied the same regardless, so he might as well wear stuff he actually liked.
For the first time, Rin felt a tinge of envy. She couldnât imagine ever getting angry at her parents and asking anything of them. That just sounded so⊠rude. And she could never imagine her mom ever listening to her about it. She barely tolerated to bring Rin outside, even less in public places where men could be around â which, to be fair, most Zodiac parents acted that way, but she knew her mother was a unique case even by those standards.
Her inkling had been right, too, because the moment she even somewhat challenged and questioned their family, her life turned into actual hell.
As soon as the farce that was their household dropped, her mother started to not care as much about how Rin looked to the outside; she didnât touch her hair anymore, didnât choose any of her clothes, could barely stand to look at her.
Rin was the one who started caring about it instead. She became obsessed with maintaining her image of a well-groomed, pretty little girl despite it all; always did her best to keep her long hair brushed and pristine even after her parents pulled on it; always camouflaged the bruises and marks and scratches behind long sleeves and skirts and scarfs.
It wasnât very effective. No matter how much she tried, she couldnât hide all that well the way her body withered, the cadaver shine of her skin, the way sheâd lost so much weight her skin floated on her bones, and the dark bags under her eyes.
Once upon a time, Rin believed people when they called her a cute little girl.
Now whenever she looked at herself in the mirror, she felt nothing but disgusted.
* * *
This should be strange, but living with Kaguraâs family honestly felt worse than living with her parents.
At least with her own mom and dad, she knew what to expect, she was used to how things were. It could be hard, but she still clung to the hope that theyâd be able to go back to being a happy family one day; that was what managed to keep her going.
Now that hope had been completely shattered, and she could do nothing but live with a constant reminder of how broken she was. She couldnât even blame the Zodiac Curse, because Kagura was cursed too; and yet her family was⊠well, maybe not exactly happy â her parents still argued quite a bit in a way that always left Kagura in tears â but at least not miserable the way her household had been.
The Curse was an easy excuse. The problem, Rin knew, was herself. If Kagura and some of the other Zodiacs could still be loved despite being cursed, then it must meant that there was something fundamentally wrong with her. Because what else could it be?
Rin took very few of her belongings when she moved in with Kaguraâs family, and that included some of her old clothes. However, as she put on all the cute dresses and skirts her parents had bought her; the ones her mom had so meticulously chosen for her her entire childhood; something twisted in her stomach.
Looking at herself in the mirror with those on, she felt like she could still feel her mother right behind her, her hands on her shoulders, her sharp fingers around her neck. She felt like throwing up.
She threw them all in the trash.
Kaguraâs mother was surprised, but a tactful enough person to not ask questions. Instead, she brought Rin shopping with her and Kagura. As soon as they entered the store Kagura instantly jumped toward the rows of clothes aimed at teenage girls â to her motherâs dismay who cried out at her to please be careful and to make sure to stay away from boys and men â and, in the span of a handful of minutes, already had at least ten outfits in her arms, ready to try them out.
Kagura dressed a little similar to the way Rin did; but there was⊠something different about it. Something that felt more personal. She liked the same kind of colorful cute dresses and skirts, but still favored the shorter and more practical ones in which she could move easily. She gravitated toward ruffle fronts and tunics and orange colors and cat-themed patterns.
Her outfits still felt categorically Kagura, in a way Rinâs clothes had never really felt Rin.
Rin stared at the Zodiac boar flutter among the dresses like a butterfly, as if mesmerized, until Kaguraâs mother broke the spell â and for the first time in her life, someone asked her what clothes she wanted to buy.
And Rin⊠Rin didnât know.
She stared at the lines of shirts and pants and skirts blankly, her mind empty. She knew the type of clothes her mother would have liked; the ones she would have chosen for her to wear, the ones that would have been modest and prim and proper.
But Rin had no idea which ones she liked. Every time she grabbed the hem of one of them, she felt her throat tighten and let it go instantly. When Kagura pushed her to try on some dresses sheâd picked out for her, Rin felt uncomfortable getting out of the fitting room and being stared at.
She felt all wrong, all clammy. She expected someone, anyone, to get angry at her for⊠for⊠she didnât know.
No one got angry at her though. Kagura looked a little frustrated but she only rolled her eyes, and her mother was saddened but didnât push the issue. She and her daughter picked a handful of plain, inoffensive clothes that would fit a middle school girl her age, and then that was the end of it.
Rin didnât know why she felt like crying when she exited the clothing store.
âMaybe I could help you,â Haru had suddenly proposed one day. It was one of those where sheâd felt so depressed she didnât even want to get out of her room, but the boy had come drag her out regardless and spend time with her.
Rin didnât know why he kept doing that. She was such a boring girl. Surely someone as kind and fun as Haru had lots of other friends he could hang out with instead of someone like herâŠ
âHelp with what?â She snapped, much more harshly than she meant it to be. Haru didnât seem to mind. He never minded, even when she was needlessly mean to him sometimes.
âWith buying new clothes,â he replied nonchalantly. âFind stuff you like.â
Rin refused at first. But that was the thing with Haru: he was patient, but ridiculously stubborn. He never pushed her, but kept innocently bringing up the topic over and over. So at some point Rin got annoyed and caved in.
They went to the clothing store together. Rin had hoped that, this time with Haru by her side, she would feel⊠she wasnât sure. Differently, maybe. But she found herself in the same position as she did with Kagura and her mother: her mind blank, her eyes glazing over the rows of clothes with no feelings.
She picked out some stuff at random. Tried out a couple of shirts and dresses. By the time she got to the fifth outfits, she started to feel frustrated.
âHow do you even do it, anyway?â She asked Haru. âHow do you pick⊠pick stuff that you like? How do you know?â
Haru blinked his round brown eyes at her, face unreadable. And then he said, âI just know.â
Rin groaned. Of course Haru would be no help at all about this! She turned to look at herself once more in front of the mirror. She was wearing a purple sundress with flower patterns. Something cute. Something her mother would have no doubt loved.
She felt sick. She wanted to tear it off. She wanted to tear off the cloth and then her very flesh until nothing was left so she finally didnât have to look at her own reflection in the mirror every morning.
âI donât know what I like,â she finally admitted. âItâs not a big deal anyway. I donât understand why youâre so obsessed with this.â
âItâs important,â Haru insisted. âItâs about you, so itâs important.â
Itâs because itâs about me that itâs not important, Rin thought, almost said; but the only thing that got out of her mouth when she opened it was a sob.
She removed the dress so abruptly she tore off some of its buttons and straps, but neither she nor Haru cared as she broke down in tears in her underwear in the middle of the store.
âYou donât have to rush, yâknow,â Haru said softly after she calmed down and they left. âYou take your time to figure stuff out.â
Rin didnât answer, and Haru held her hand the whole way home.
* * *
She went back to the clothing store with Haru a handful of times after that.
She still wasnât sure what to choose, so she asked Haru to guide her; asked him what he thought would fit her. Haru didnât like it, because he wanted her to pick something on her own. But in the end he gave up and carefully selected a couple of shirts and skirts.
A part of her had always envied Haru a little; not just the freedom his parents allowed him, but the way he seemed so confident in himself. Haru said it was all thanks to Yuki, but Rin didnât agree. She was pretty sure Haru was just born like that, with that aura of self-assurance, that kindness that made people gravitates toward him like moths gravitates to light. That made leeches like herself stick on him and drain him dry.
Rin looked at Haru, at his nonchalant posturing and his messy pepper and salt hair, his leather jackets and spiked necklaces and earrings and ripped jeans, and felt such an overwhelming sense of wanting to be with him, to be him, to wrap around his very self and never let go. That yearning scared her. She didnât think sheâd ever loved that much before; and she didnât know how to let go.
So, Rin pondered; if Haru wanted so badly for her to âfigure herself out,â maybe she could give it a try â and if she thought of it as figuring herself out through Haru, maybe she could even manage it.
This was with that mindset that she went shopping, for the first time ever in her life, on her own. She bought a few things â she had just enough with the little pocket money Kaguraâs mother had given her. At least if there was one good thing about the Sohma Clan, it was that money had never been a problem; even if she couldnât get rid of her guilty conscience the whole time, as she would have never dared to do something like this with her parents.
She went back home, and slowly dressed up. She put on some makeup, awkwardly as sheâd never done this before; Haru had shown her how to do it, but it was the first time she truly tried it out. And then looked at herself in the mirror.
That was still her. Female, twelve years old, tall, long black hair, thin and pale. But now her lips and nails and eyelids were painted black; she was wearing a long-sleeved, see-through black shirt with a corset top underneath; a tight leather skirt Haru had picked for her the other day, and black wedge boots. Nothing too flashy, if maybe a little inappropriate for a middle school kid.
The sick feeling she had every time she saw her reflection in the mirror was still there, and she had to actively force herself to not look away. She didnât find herself pretty. She didnât feel very comfortable.
That was still her, but⊠but at the same time it wasnât. Not completely. She wasnât sure if she liked it, but she didnât dislike it; and, more importantly, she could see a little bit of Haru in her in that moment.
When she wore the same thing to greet Haru the next day, a wide smile stretched his lips. He told her she was beautiful. She wasnât sure if she agreed, but it did makes her chest feel full in a way it hadnât in a long time.
She thought about how much her mother would hate she way she looked right now, and it almost managed to make her genuinely smile.
* * *
Rin didnât know what she was doing here.
That had been such a stupid idea. She never shouldâve agreed to this. Large places like shopping malls were always bad for a Sohma, and really, Rin had never been fond of shopping, even now, butâ
âIsuzu? Are you all right?â
Rin almost jumped a little as Tohru tilted her head in her direction, her big, brown eyes shining with with worry and kindness.
She looked so much like Haru when she did that, and it always threw Rin off. She wished sheâd stop doing it.
âIâm fine,â Rin mumbled, looking away and crossing her arms.
Tohru didnât seem convinced, but then her two best friends called out to her â what were their names already? Uo and Hana or something? â and so thankfully her attention snapped away from her.
It was not long after the New Year they had spent at Kazumaâs. Tohru had called her in the morning, saying she was going to go shopping for some new clothes and needed to have âanother pair of eyes.â Rin didnât know why sheâd called her specifically. They had, a⊠well, a sort of partnership in their shared interest of wanting to break the curse, for sure; but that didnât mean they were friends⊠not quite.
Rin liked Tohru. Against all her better wishes, she truly did. But that was the problem. She couldnât let herself get any more attached than she already was.
Not until sheâd managed to break the curse, anyway.
ââdo you think, Isuzu?â
Rin blinked, getting pulled out of her thoughts. Tohru was in front of her, brandishing a sleeveless yellow dress in her face with her friends on each side of her.
âDoes it look good?â She asked again with a smile.
âShe didnât listen to a word youâve said, Tohru,â the tall blond girl replied in her stead, raising an eyebrow at Rin. âWhy did you even bring her here, anyway? Sheâs been pretty useless so far.â
âBe nice, Arisa,â said the other black-haired girl calmly, although it sounded more like a polite formality than because she was offended on Rinâs behalf.
Rin felt herself a little embarrassed at the jab, and hoped that didnât show on her face. I donât know why she brought me here either, she wanted to say, but instead she replied, âItâs⊠okay.â
Tohru smiled brightly, as if Rin had given her the best compliment in the world, and ran to a fitting room to try out the dress. As soon as sheâd disappeared, Rin found herself alone with Tohruâs two friends, who looked a little like guard dogs at this moment, ready to bit her at the slightest wrong move.
âI donât get it,â the blond â Uo, right, Tohru had called her Uo â mumbled. âYouâve got great style, so I thought youâd have some taste when Tohru introduced you. But in the end youâre just as bad as the boys when we went shopping with them.â
âThatâs just not my kind of clothes,â Rin replied awkwardly.
She didnât feel comfortable with the whole thing. Sheâd never done this before â going shopping with friends, besides Haru and Kagura, and that was because⊠well, because Rin just didnât have any friends. Sheâd always kept her distance with the other kids back in school. None of them really liked her much, anyway; too gloomy or boring or intimidating for them.
And right now, standing next to Tohruâs friends made her feel somehow⊠inadequate. Like fate was tempting her, saying, âsee, this is what being Tohruâs friend actually is like, and youâll never be that.â The suspicion she could feel from both Uo and Hana didnât help, either.
Truthfully, a part of Rin was a little disappointed about Tohruâs friends being here. When Tohru had asked her to come, she had thought it was going to be only the two of them. So she couldnât help but feel like sheâd been a little misled.
And then she felt stupid for caring so much about any of this anyway.
âThat is not our âkindâ either, in case you have not noticed,â Hana said.
Of course, she was right. Both Uo and Hana looked quite different from Tohru, not just in appearance but in outfit too. Uoâs clothes were rather simple, white shirt and jeans, but her dyed blond hair and leather jacket and the way she handled herself screamed former sukeban; meanwhile Hana dressed all in black, with a heavy and elegant dress and a long hat on top of her wavy hair. They looked as if theyâd each jumped out of a different movie genre. It felt jarring, especially in comparison to Tohru, who⊠well.
Tohru, who dressed in a very similar way to how Rin used to dress as a child. Cute, colorful dresses, ribbons, short flowery skirts. A sweeter, pinker version of Kagura; the gentleness of Haru; the looks of Rinâs favorite childhood doll.
Tohru, who spent all of her time talking about her amazing mother and how much sheâd loved her. Even now, sheâd just kept on and on about all the times she and her mom had gone shopping together, about all the cute clothes she would buy for her even when they were short on the money.
âShe would always tell me how adorable I am,â Tohru had explained on their way here, a soft, melancholic smile on her face, and Rinâs heart hurt in a way she wasnât able to put into words. âIt was like a way to say âI love youâ to me.â
Rin looked at Tohru, and wondered. In a life where Rin wasnât born broken, wasnât born in a cursed clan, had been raised by a version of her mom and dad who actually loved her: would she have looked like Tohru, too? Would she have never touched the black makeup and the cross necklaces and the low-cut revealing shirts?
Would that be a version of herself that she actually liked? That wouldnât makes her feel repulsed every time she looked into a mirror?
That was stupid. There was no universe where such a thing would ever happen. No world where Rin was not born a hateful, wicked little thing.
âWhat do you expect from me, exactly?â Rin asked, and her voice sounded bitter. That wasnât totally fair, maybe. She didnât really resent those girls â they just made her feel uneasy.
Uo and Hana exchanged a look quietly. As if they could communicate by telepathy, and it only made Rin even more uncomfortable.
âJust to be more sincere,â Hana replied. âMore enthusiastic. Tohru notices those things, you know. She cares a whole lot.â
Rin didnât say anything back. She wouldnât have had the time even if she had wanted to, anyway, because at this moment Tohru jumped out of the fitting room, swirling in her yellow sundress.
She looked good, of course. Adorable. Pretty. It suited her perfectly. Uo and Hana were quick to say as much to her, and Tohruâs round cheeks pinked in joy and embarrassment. When she turned toward Rin, however⊠no such words were able to come out of her mouth. She opened it and closed it as quickly, and then as she saw the clear disappointment on Tohruâs face she looked away, shame filling her chest. She didnât need to look at Uo and Hana to know they were glaring at her from behind.
This lack of reaction didnât deter Tohru, however. The minute after that she was back to her usual energy, jumping from row to row like an excited rabbit. After disappearing among a bunch of dresses she reappeared in front of Rin with a broad smile, holding a pink one with short baggy sleeves.
âIsuzu, you need to try out this one!â She exclaimed.
Rin gaped at her. âDid you see how I usually dress? What even made you think Iâd like this?â
Tohru pouted. âBut, I just⊠you know, I think youâd look cute in it! Come on, you can just try it, right? You donât have to buy it or anything!â
Rin looked at the dress, then at Tohru, then sighed. She wanted to refuse; was just about to. But then she still felt guilty about what happened earlier, about her general inability to be a normal friend â even when she barely considered herself Tohruâs friend â and glimpsed at Uo and Hana who were staring at her pointedly.
So, Rin agreed.
She and Tohru hopped in together in a room, and as soon as the door closed Rin already started to regret it.
âDo you⊠I mean, do you have to stay⊠here?â she asked hesitantly.
Tohru tilted her head innocently at her. âWhy? Does that bother you?â
âN-no, itâs justââ
âAh, if youâre that shy then donât worry, Iâll just get out right awayââ
âIâm not shy! Ugh, thatâs fine, forget it.â
Rin sighed, and turned around in annoyance. She felt weird, but technically, there was nothing to feel embarrassed about. They were both girls. And Rin never had any issues with wearing revealing clothes in public, so undressing in the same fitting room as a girl shouldnât be odd. Sheâd done it before during PE in her all-girls private school.
Maybe the fact that the girl in question was Tohru Honda was the problem â but she didnât want to dwell on that, pushed the thought away and removed her shirt. At that moment she heard a shocked gasp. It took her a little while to figure out what might have made Tohru make that sound â before she remembered.
Right. Her scar. It was funny how quickly that scar had become a part of Rin, just as much as all the others, physical and mental. However, unlike the others, Rin didnât actually mind this one. It was the mark of how she did her best to protect Haru â the reminder of her determination to break the curse. Maybe, in an odd way, it was a scar she actually had some affection for.
Tohru stayed completely silent. Even her breathing could barely be heard. Rin wondered what might be going on inside her head. Had she really never seen it until now? Rin wore a lot of open-back shirts and dresses, but she supposed that with her long hair, the scar was usually not very visible. But right now the top of her body was completely bare except for her braâŠ
The thought made her feel oddly warm. She cleared her throat while starting to remove her skirt.
âCan youâ can you give me that dress?â She asked.
âHuh? Ah⊠Ah! Yes! Yes! Of course!â
Tohru sounded like sheâd just been snapped out of a daydream, and she quickly hurried to hand over the dress. Rin pulled it on, but some of her hair got caught into the topâs buttons. Tohru reacted instantly; she disentangled her long strands from the buttons delicately, almost like she couldnât bear the idea of Rinâs hair getting damaged in the process, and then helped her out putting on the rest of the cloth. Rin could feel her fingers lingering slightly on her shoulders; her scapula, grazing the exact place of where her scar was situated in such a gentle way it almost made her want to cry.
Rin was about to thank her; but as she turned around, she caught sight of her own reflection in the mirror, and her heart froze inside her chest.
In that moment, she didnât look like the eighteen-year-old young woman that she was; but like a little girl. She was back to being the prim and proper eight-year-old with the perfect brushed straight hair and the rosy cheeks, the little doll living in a play her parents manhandled as they pleased. Tohruâs fingers on her shoulders stopped feeling comforting and instead turned into claws meant to tear through her skin.
âYou looks so beautiful!â Tohru exclaimed, but her voice was distorted, and Rin felt anything but.
She wasnât beautiful; she was the grown up version of what her parents had wished so badly to mold her into all those years ago. Unbroken. Uncursed.
Rin didnât know how to be either of those things.
âOh⊠oh my god. Isuzu?! Are⊠are you okay? Are you hurt?â
Tohruâs panicked voice was like shattering porcelain in her mind, shrilling and sharp. Rin turned around, looked atâ at her friend. Tohruâs eyes were wide with worry. Her thumb traced her cheeks, and only then did Rin realize she was crying.
Again. Again. Why was she always so weak with Tohru?
Self-hatred washed over her, all-consuming and smothering and inescapable.
âSorry,â she mumbled. God, she wanted to die so badly. âSorry.â
âI-itâs okay!â Tohru squeaked. âI-Iâm the one who⊠I mean, youâre not hurt, right? Do you want me to callââ
Rin pulled off the dress brusquely â as far away from her as possible. Threw it on the ground. She wanted to rip it into pieces. Hurl it into the trash. Burn it and burn it and burn it.
She took a deep breath; her fingers, her whole body shaking. She wiped her tears. Breathed in and out and in.
âSorry,â she repeated, âI didnâtââ How was she even supposed to explain any of that to Tohru? She couldnât even explain it to herself. She was so damn pathetic. âThatâs⊠thatâs just not me.â
That was the only thing she landed on. The only thing she could ever properly put into words, probably.
Maybe, in an alternate dimension, so far removed from reality it would never even come true to being somewhat tangible and material â maybe then, there existed a version of Isuzu Sohma who would wear a dress like that, and enjoy it, and calls herself beautiful.
That version would never be her, though.
Rin expected Tohru to apologize; but the other girl stayed quiet, eerily so. Maybe even she could be at a loss for words sometimes, she supposed.
She dressed herself up in her old clothes again, and instantly felt more relaxed, like going back into her original skin. When they went back to Uo and Hana, Rin knew the two of them could tell right away something was wrong, even with Tohruâs attempt to act normal; but neither of them commented on it. They did seem to be a bit nicer toward her, though.
By the time they reached the end of the afternoon, things hadnât gone too bad though. Rin hadnât bought anything, but Tohru had all the clothes she needed; and even if things were a little strained, the atmosphere wasnât the worst either.
As they were about to part, Tohru turned toward Rin with shiny, watery eyes, and asked with a point of desperation: âDid you have fun?â
Despite herself, Rin smiled. âYeah.â
Tohru didnât seem satisfied. She hesitated for a little while, and then reached toward Rin.
âCan I⊠Can I hug you?â
Rin opened her mouth, stunned. She threw a glance behind her, where Uo and Hana were staring at them. They had a strange, knowing look in their eyes, something fond that Rin didnât know how to make sense of. She looked away from them and, a little shyly, nodded.
Tohru wrapped her arms around her. She was smaller than Rin, but somehow she still managed to drag her against her chest. Her embrace was tight. Rin wasnât able to bring herself to hug her back.
âThank you so much for coming,â Tohru said with a bright smile after pulling away.
Rin wondered why she felt so gutted about that.
* * *
Rin couldnât get used to have short hair.
The last time she had, she probably must have been a little toddler, and she had absolutely no memories of it. Rin didnât remember much of her childhood in general; the whole thing blended together in a mix of fake happy memories and pain and fear and longing.
A part of her felt it was better that way, somehow.
Haru had been the one who cut her hair. Or, well, who cut the rest of the mess that Akito had made, at least. Heâd brought in a pair of scissors inside the hospital â which was extremely forbidden, but well, it was Haru â had sat her down and gently cut off the rest of it. He had done it in such a gentle way, as if Rin was the most precious thing in the world, that Rin had almost turned around and kissed him afterwards.
She hadnât, though. A part of her still yearned for him. Maybe a part of her would always yearn for Haru.
But she had taken the decision â that it was better right now, for both of them, to keep their relationship to where it was, as friends. It hurt, but that was a separation and freedom she needed right now. Haru had agreed. So she intended to do her best to keep on that resolution.
Rin sighed, and ran her hand through her short hair once more. She didnât know if she liked it. It was yet another thing that had been done to her without asking, without consent, out of her control. But she wasnât sure if she wanted to let it grow back either. It felt⊠weirdly freeing, in a way. Like sheâd finally gotten rid of a weight that had burdened her her entire life.
Or maybe it had nothing to do with her hair at all and more to do with the fact she was finally free from the curse.
In the past few days, she caught herself thinking that she was way too free. She was still living at Kazumaâs house, at least for now. She liked Kaguraâs parents well enough, but it had always felt more comfortable here.
She knew she couldnât stay here forever though. She had to catch up the school year sheâd missed and properly graduate from high school, but after that⊠after that, she didnât know. She could do anything; go anywhere, really. It was a little scary. And maybe exciting. How weird it was to feel so lost and content at the same time.
It was with her head full of those thoughts when Tohru called her this morning to go shopping together.
Rin couldnât see why, because she was pretty certain that Tohru wasnât lacking in any clothes at all. But she was going to graduate and move away in a handful of months, so maybe she still needed some new stuff.
Sheâd found some job prospect, it seemed, as an aid and cleaning lady at a small clinic. She seemed kind of excited about it, too. Rin would be lying to say she wasnât dreading the day of the graduation where sheâd have to say good bye to Tohru â but at least she wouldnât be alone, as Kyo would move with her in the same city.
Even so, she could barely imagine what a life would be like without Tohru so close to her anymore, and it made her feel a little sick with loneliness. Maybe that was why sheâd agreed to go â she just really wanted to spend the most time possible around Tohru with the little they had left.
It was just the two of them, this time, with Uo and Hana nowhere to be seen. They spent almost three hours going through the rows of clothes, each selecting their own set of outfits and trying them on. This time, Tohru didnât try to force any dress on Rin.
However, right as they were about to finally leave, Tohru suddenly grabbed her sleeve; and with a small voice, asked her the strangest question Rin had expected: âCould you pick an outfit for me?â
Rin stared at her in surprise, and Tohru added: âIâ I mean⊠an outfit like what you usually wear. That you think would suit me.â
Rin looked at her own current short black dress, then back at Tohru, who had an almost opposite fit. âUh⊠are you sure? I mean, our styles arenât reallyâŠâ
But then Tohru looked at her straight into her eyes, full of her usual firm determination, and nodded. So Rin did as she was told. She picked something she would wear, bordering on punk and goth, but still modest enough that it could fit Tohruâs general vibe.
She however waited until they got to Shigureâs house to finally hand it over to Tohru, who looked at it with a satisfied smile, before asking the second strangest thing of the day:
âCould you help me do my makeup like yours now?â
Rin opened her mouth, even more baffled. What was going on on right now? Was Tohru playing a prank on her?
âSure,â she still said, a little uncertain.
And so she did. She pulled out her whole makeup kit, and then started applying eyeliner and mascara and eye shadow onto Tohruâs face, making her giggle.
âIs this the first time youâve worn makeup or something?â Rin asked, because Tohru acted like an elementary school girl trying out her momâs lipstick in secret.
âNot really. Hana showed me how to do it before. Once, me, Uo and Hana and Mom had a girlsâ night makeover when I was in middle school, and it was a lot of fun! Itâs the first time Iâve ever worn an all-black make up, though.â
Rin snorted. âReally? I would think Hanajima would have introduced you to it before.â
Tohru hummed thoughtfully. âYeah, but she didnât. She said black didnât suit me.â As Rin was putting on black lipstick on Tohru, she couldnât help but agree. It felt a little wrong, somehow. âBut you know, Hana donât always wear black all the time. She didnât use to do that as a little girl.â
âWhy did she start, then?â
Rin finished her work on Tohruâs lips, and Tohru moved away, opening her eyes. The black of the eyeliner made her eyes appears so much more prettier and shinier, and Rin had to force herself not to look away.
âSomething⊠bad happened to Hana, when she was little,â she started. Rin had the feeling she was wrecking her brain in order to say as little as possible so as not to reveal her friendâs entire past while still being understood. âShe lashed out at that. That wasnât her fault! She was just a little kid. But to this day, she still blame herself for it. So she started to wear all black, as, um. A form of penance, I guess.â
Tohru was frowning, and Rin wasnât sure if it was because she didnât really get it or because she didnât like it, or maybe both. But then the frown disappeared and she smiled. âOh, but I think she really started liking dressing like that now! Plus, she looks beautiful like that, doesnât she?â
Rin paused. âYes,â she agreed. âShe does.â
She never thought she'd ever feel that way about Hanajima, but now a sort of kinship with her had formed. She kind of felt the same, after all. Rin also started dressing like this because of exterior factors; a way to cut herself off from the image her parents tried to impose on her, a way to imitate Haru, feel a little bit of himself in her at all time.
Now, she couldnât imagine dressing any other way. She wasnât sure if that meant sheâd started liking herself, exactly â just that it had become a part of who she was.
With Tohruâs makeup all done, her friend then disappeared inside her room for a handful of minutes, and reappeared completely transformed, wearing the clothes Rin had chosen. She had a V-cut black shirt with see-through webbed sleeves, a mini circle skirt and thighs themed with the sleevesâ designs. Sheâd gotten her a black collar with crosses falling on her clavicles and wedged high heels, and two bat-themed hair clips ribbons horned her head. The ribbons wasnât something Rin would ever wear, but she couldnât help it but choose them for Tohru when she saw them.
Tohru looked a little unsure as she stepped forward on wobbly feet, clearly uncomfortable in her high heels. Rin smiled at her, trying to be encouraging; but then she couldnât stifle a snicker when Tohru stumbled and she caught her arm.
âDonât laugh!â Tohru pouted, glaring at her. âI never walk with high heelsâŠâ
âIt gets some time to gets used to it,â Rin conceded.
Tohru looked up to her, squeezing Rinâs arm, and Rin couldnât help but be hyper aware of how close they suddenly were to each other. She only had to lean a few centimeters closer for their foreheads to touch. Tohru smiled at her, then; fond and warm with her cheeks still a little rosy, and the words spilled out from Rinâs mouth before she could stop them: âYouâre beautiful.â
Her first reflex was to feel embarrassed over it. But Tohruâs reaction to the compliment was so exaggerated â wide eyes, mouth parted in a large âOâ, face reddening in a deep a scarlet â that Rin suddenly felt strangely confident in herself; and didnât she owe Tohru that much, anyway, with the way sheâd failed to compliment her last time they went shopping together?
âI think I still prefer you in your usual clothes, but⊠you look really pretty like this too.â
Tohru opened and closed her mouth a few times like a fish out of water. Then she nodded, flushed and resigned; âTh-thank you,â she mumbled.
Rin stared at her. She hesitated, but then finally decided to voice the question sheâd had ever since the shopping mall: âWhy⊠Why did you ask me to dress you like I usually do?â
Her voice was soft, almost whispered. She wasnât sure why. It just felt⊠oddly intimate, like asking Tohru a secret, for some reason.
âOh⊠well.â Tohru looked down, her eyes narrowed. âI just wanted to try it out. Isuzu, youâre always so⊠strong. Sure of yourself. I thought it would give me some strength, maybe, if I could look a little like you.â
Rin was so stunned she was even sure how to react at first. Strong? Sure of herself? That was how Tohru saw her? Rin had always been the farthest thing from that. Sheâd always beenâŠ
She wanted to protest, but Tohruâs firm, confident voice made her unable to.
âAnd I liked myself when I saw what I looked like in the mirror,â her friend continued. âItâs⊠itâs different, but youâre right, I think I look good. Itâs like Iâm a completely different person right now.â
Tohru straightened up. She was still smaller than Rin, but at that moment, as she looked straight into Rinâs eyes, it felt as if she was the exact same height; maybe even taller.
âIsuzu,â she said, her voice full of conviction. âCan I kiss you?â
Rin wasnât sure if she really understood the question then. Wasnât sure if she really understood the implications of it. But her body reacted nonetheless, almost on instinct, and she nodded. When Tohru cupped her cheeks and leaned in to press her lips still fresh of black lipstick against her own, she knew it had been the right choice.
The kiss was brief and a little clumsy, as expected of a teenager whoâd never kissed anyone before. And when Tohru pulled away, she giggled a little like a child.
âI put lipstick on the corner of your mouth,â she said, and gently rubbed the black stain with her thumb â but Rin grabbed her wrist, stopping her.
âItâs fine. I donât mind.â
âOh, okay.â Tohru lowered her hand, and then she smiled sheepishly. âCan we kiss again, then?â
Rinâs smile mirrored hers. She didnât answer, instead being the one to lean in this time, and kissed her more deeply.
With the way Tohru looked, Rin thought it felt a little like kissing herself.
* * *
Tohru was already gone when Rin woke up this morning.
That wasnât unusual; their schedules were never synchronized, and Tohru started work early unlike Rin. Even so, whenever Rin opened her eyes and felt an empty space next to her in their bed, she still felt a tinge of fear, a void in her chest. She should be used to this by now; theyâve been living together for over a year, ever since Rin graduated from art school, but she supposed some habits were hard to kill.
Maybe that fear would just never entirely disappear, and sheâd keep feeling this way until she was an old lady.
A part of her felt a little depressed over it. But on the other hand, if that meant she could stay by Tohruâs side even in her old age, she didnât mind it as much.
She chased those thoughts away, and headed toward their wardrobes. They had two of them. Not that they had that many clothes â or at least, Tohru didnât have that many. Rin did have quite a few (a lot of them sheâd gotten from Haru). But with how different their outfits usually were, it was just easier to separate when they had to dress in the morning.
Rin headed for her own wardrobe at first â but then stopped when she noticed something on the chair near their bed.
A pink dress, one of Tohruâs, that hanged on the backrest, abandoned. Maybe Tohru had planned to wear it this morning, but changed her mind last minute for something else.
Rin stared at it for a long minute. And then, on a whim she couldnât truly explain, she grabbed the dress and went to the bathroom with it. She showered and brushed her hair and teeth and, finally, put it on.
She looked at herself in the mirror. Dark brown eyes stared back.
That was her. A woman in her mid-twenties. Tall and thin and pale, black hair brushing over her shoulders; thin lips and angular jaw and sharp shoulders and scarred; still broken, still wicked, still not all that pretty, albeit uncursed.
But as she stared at her own profile while wearing her loverâs cute, pink dress, she didnât see the little girl she had once been years and years ago.
She didnât find herself quite as repulsively disgusting anymore.
A smile even managed to flutter on her lips, and she grasped her chest, pink tissue writhing under her fingers.
She decided to keep the dress the whole day, and when Tohru came back home, exhausted and almost ready to jump into bed, she squealed at the sight and kissed her all over the face in joy and Rin just felt warm.
She didnât like the dress all that much; might probably never wear it ever again, but she didnât feel like suffocating as it enfolded her body. That was a start; maybe another step at figuring herself out.
Rin wondered if Tohru would accept to go shopping together tomorrow.
Summary: Emma wakes up late and cooks some eggs for Regina with a side of pointless banter.
Femslash February Prompt: Yellow
As far as the rainbow goes, Regina has her favorites. Red like her apple tree, a sophisticated royal purple like her magic. But really she prefers monochrome. Black suits her best and it pairs well with red. It pairs well with most everything. White works well tooâmakes black pop. Blacks and whites make her office feel clean and sleek, make her feel productive. Regina is fond of beige as well. Henry likes to tease her for being âa sad beige mom.â Regina likes to roll her eyes and remind him that the wallpaper in his bedroom is blue and that he had plenty of color as a child.
As far as the rainbow goes, Regina has her least favorites. Orange too bright, pink is too delicate, too soft, and she never looks good in it and yellowâŠyellow is just completely obnoxious. Yellow, like Emmaâs hair in certain lights. Yellow like the dice charms on Emmaâs keychain. Yellow like that atrocious, eye sore parked in her driveway. Emma, she decides, was doomed by the narrative to be obnoxious.Â
âMorning, Regina.â She greets at exactly 12 PM.
Regina quirks a brow. âA little late for that isnât it, dear?â
Emma glance at her watch. âMorning, afternoon, whatâs the difference?â
Regina hums. âAbout six hours depending on how early you start the day.âÂ
âDepending on when I start my day?â She asks. âSo there is no difference!â
Regina sighs. She supposes that she hadnât thought that one through.Â
âSo whatâs for breakfast?â
âLunch is a salad wrap and a platter of freshly picked apples. I just sliced them this morning.â
âIâm going to make some eggs.â She declares.Â
âEggs?â
âTo go with your salad wrap.â She adds as if that clears anything up. âIâll have breakfast yet! You like your eggs sunny side up or over easy? Or scrambled? Or do you want an omelet?âÂ
âChefâs choice.â She replies.Â
âSunny side up.â Emma flashes her a smile. âYou could use some sunshine. Whatâs on your mind?â
Regina furrows her brows. âNothing in particular, why?â
âYou look sad? Mad? Smad?â
âEmma, this is just my face.â
âWell thatâs one helluva resting bitch face!â She declares as she crack the eggs into a sizzling pan.
âSo Iâve been told.â She puts her pen down and pushes her paperwork to the side. âYouâre not going to ask me to smile, are you?â
âNope, donât have to.â She leans down and pecks the woman on the forehead and then on the cheek and then on the forehead. Gets really close and goes in for another kiss but Regina moves her head so this one lands on her eye. And there it is, a smile!
âSwan, thatâs not where kisses are supposed to go!â
âYouâre not supposed to move your head when youâre getting showered with them! Yeesh!â
âYou better check on the eggs, Iâm not eating them if they are burnt and you will buy me new pans ifâŠâ
Emma ruffles her hair. âThat sure is a funny way of saying, âhey, thanks for breakfast!ââÂ
âLunch.â Regina corrects.
âWhavever.â She gives Reina a nudge as turns the stove off. And Regina has a plate of eggs in front of her with the yolks spilling free. âOkay so they arenât the best looking eggs, but I assure you that they taste just fine.â
âYou first. I am not trying that until I see you eat one first.â
âItâs not an apple, I didnât poison it.â
âHa.â
âApples were a good choice, I think.â
Regina fixes her with a quizzical look. Head tilted, brows slightly knit.Â
âWell just imagine handing Snow a poisoned egg to eat? That would just sound silly. Or a peanut! What if you gave her a poisoned peanut? That would have sounded pretty stupid and wouldnât have looked nice and dramatic like an apple rolling out of her hand after she bit it. It was a pretty good fruit choice too. It probably would have looked pretty weird if you would have whipped out a pineapple or a watermelon. OrâŠâ
âOkay, I understand the point.â Regina replies, checks slightly flushed. She doesn't particularly fancy imagining herself lugging around a pineapple. She doesnât want to laugh at Emmaâs antics but she canât exactly stifle a small laugh.
âHog roast.â
âExcuse me?â
âYou should have poised a hog roast.â
âFirst of all, a hog roast is the event, the hog is the meal served at the hog roast. Second of all, no.âÂ
Emma is absolutely howling, clutching her sides. She bangs a fist on the table, manages to strike the plate and shower Regina with a spray of yolk.