#feels right

Sydney had been at PTMC for her entire nursing career. She had been through everything here. It felt like home at this point. The long hours and the work were all consuming. But there was something about the people that kept her there. Even on her worst days, when she wanted to leave, she remembered it meant leaving the people she considered family.

When COVID hit, everything felt like it had changed. Everything felt rougher, and the job became harder. The days felt endless, and so did the deaths. Those who had worked during COVID and remained had formed a bond that felt like it made them inseparable.

It helped that she had moved into an apartment in one of the brownstones down the street from Robby. It wasn't unusual for them to commute together from that point on.

Sydney wasn't sure when her crush on Robby had developed. She had always noticed him in some sense. She had eyes. And it wasn't like he was an angel. When he wasn't in a serious relationship, it was no secret that Robby liked a good casual relationship.

After COVID, when the restrictions had eased, and Robby had stepped up as chief, things seemed to shift. He dated Janey for a few years, something that all of them had thought was an improvement. But when they broke up, he returned to his regular pattern. His casual exploits were the worst kept secret.

Robby and his 7 week itch.

Sydney laughed with the rest of them whenever they heard he had struck again. While Sydney had more than once eyed him, she wanted something committed. Finding her own love life was short spurts in that pursuit.

So what if she had noticed when he smiled, or when his ridiculous laugh often made her smile and laugh in return. The casual exchange of coffees or flirty smiles. The way he would rub his neck when he was frustrated or his nails together when he was thinking.

They were a great team; Sydney knew she was quick and efficient. She was almost able to predict him before he even had to request. She never missed the way he said "thank you, Syd," in a tone that was so sweet she couldn't help her face go red.

Sydney had to admit, the day of Pittfest had been hell. Every emotion she had felt through COVID had been dredged up. The day had started rough, Alex having broken up with her the night before, and it just seemed to get worse with every passing moment. Then the Pittfest shooting was announced, and bodies began to arrive.

It had been a feat that they had saved so many.

Sydney had managed to keep it together. She had tried so hard. Unconsciously, she had kept searching for Robby, realizing she was doing it and would turn to force herself to focus. Eventually, he somehow managed to fully disappear, and everyone called around the floor to find him.

"Syd?" Jack had slid up beside her in one of the trauma rooms, so quiet she had jumped. "Have you seen Robby?"

"No," she shook her head, looking around as if the six foot tall man would just appear. So when everything calmed down, and she had somehow found herself pulled into the yellow zone, she eventually found him as he was leaving a discussion with Whitaker, his eyes puffy and red.

"Robby?" she ignored that her voice shook as she approached him, "Are you ok?"

He hesitated, his brown eyes refusing to meet her greys. He shook his head, giving a slight smile that Sydney felt was more a grimace than anything else. "Finish up with what you need to do, ok? Day shift should head home soon."

"Ok," she whispered as he passed her as if he were a ghost. That had done it. Everything was catching up at once. This felt exactly how it had when Adamson had died. Like he was disappearing in front of her. She forced herself not to cry; she knew it wasn't personal. The day was just overwhelming for everyone.

She spent the next hour helping manage the remaining patients, ensuring everyone was accounted for and that handoffs were completed. Finally, she joined the crowd as Robby thanked everyone for their efforts, his own tears trying to escape.

That broke her.

Tears fell as she hugged Princess and Jesse before escaping into the bathroom and locking herself in. The familiar adrenaline crash hit hard; the tears felt endless.

Finally, when she couldn't cry anymore, she washed her face and exited, running into Perlah, who was passing her, looking just as exhausted.

"Oh, hun," Perlah said, pulling Sydney into a hug. Both women held onto each other. "I know some of them are going to the park for drinks, if you don't want to be alone,"

"Maybe," Sydney hesitated. She longed for bed right now. "I-I dunno. I'm exhausted."

Perlah nodded, whispering her goodbyes. Sydney watched as the rest of the day shift headed out. She waited for a few minutes, trying to see if she could find Jack or Robby, but both seemed to have disappeared entirely.

"Lena," Sydney called as she approached the hub where Lena and Dana stood. She looked as the board was getting updated with information. "Do you need any more help?"

"Go home, hun, we're good here," Lena said, looking up over her glasses. "You're gonna need a rest. You're on tomorrow, aren't you?"

"Yeah," Sydney bit her lip. She didn't want to go home to an empty apartment, where she would just think about everything she had seen today. But she nodded in confirmation with Lena. It was time. She would just have to deal. Moving to her locker, she grabbed her things. She needed to accept that it would be a long night where she wouldn't be able to sleep. It was fine.

As she moved towards the chairs, she found Myrna being reattached to a wheelchair by a police officer.

"Oh my girl," Myrna used her unattached hand to beckon Sydney forward. She followed, accepting the woman's hug. "You look so sad."

"I am," Sydney admitted, pulling away from the woman, crouching down so they could be eye to eye. "I'll be ok though, I promise. Always am. Is there anything I can do for you?"

"Go home, get some sleep," Myrna said with a shake of her head.

"I am," Sydney sighed. "Have you seen Dr. Robby?"

"Oh, he left with Dr. Abbot," the woman wiggled her eyebrows suggestively, "now that's a man you should be looking for."

Sydney couldn't help but laugh, thanking Myrna. Obviously, they were heading to the park to join for a drink. Sydney made her way through the already crowded chairs, shaking her head. Crazy, the minute they opened, they were full.

Winding her way out of the hospital and heading across the street to the park, she could already see that a few stragglers were still there.

"Hey!" Donnie called as she approached them, "come for a drink?"

"You wish," she said playfully, going in to give him a hug. "You guys are a stop on the way home," pulling her ponytail out and giving a sigh as she let her brown hair fall. The back of her skull was sore from being pulled back so long.

"Do you want a beer for the road?" Donnie asked, signaling to the cooler.

"No, I'm good. Enjoy your drinks, see you guys tomorrow!" with a wave to everyone before quickly moving to give Jack a hug and a kiss blown to Princess before she took off. She walked as fast as she could; it didn't take long before she caught up to Robby ahead of her.

She caught up, touching his arm so he knew she was there, knowing his AirPods were in. He startled, looking over at her. He stopped walking, giving her a small smile as he pulled his headphones out and tucked them away.

"Hey," he said with some warmth that caused her stomach to turn.

"Hi," she hesitated, "Are you ok?"

"I will be," he said, giving a shrug, refusing to look her in the eyes. "You?"

"I will be," she couldn't help but give a small smile back, turning her body to signal they should start walking. They fell into step beside each other as they continued.

"I thought you had a ride home?" he asked, looking her way. Exhaustion etched on his features. "I would have waited for you."

"Oh," she bit her lip. "No, no one to pick me up," she gave a shrug. No big deal. She could pretend it wasn't.

"What happened to…" Robby searched for the name, "Alex?"

"Uh," she hesitated, trying to remain nonchalant. "W-we didn't work out."

It was the truth, four months down the drain. He hadn't liked her long hours and claimed it was starting to interfere with their relationship. He had the standard 9-5, which made scheduling dates extremely difficult. The days she did get off, he was often working. Eventually, he claimed she wasn't committed enough to the relationship.

"He said I was working too much, too busy," she didn't look over at Robby, maybe if she didn't, he wouldn't see she was heartbroken. "It's better anyway. I don't think I'm ready for commitment."

She hesitated then, as she could feel him looking at her. The heat in her cheeks. She could feel the idea pop in her head. She didn't want to be alone yet; the adrenaline crash would be brutal in an empty apartment. She absolutely wouldn't sleep either, and tomorrow would be worse.

"Do you-" she stopped walking. They were close to her brownstone. Suddenly, shyness took over. This would probably wreck the friendship, but maybe it wouldn't. "Do you want to come to my place?"

The look he gave her made her blush as shock crossed his face as he got her meaning. His mouth opened as if he wanted to say something, but hesitation took over. She wanted to crawl into a hole. "Syd-"

"I know, stupid. Forget I said anything," she shook her head. She could feel stupid for a bit, and as long as it didn't wreck their friendship, it was fine. Tomorrow, she would feel as if she were dying from embarrassment. And this was Robby. He'd avoid her for a bit, and everything would settle, and hopefully it would be fine.

"It's just-" he started to say.

"I don't-" she shook her head.

"If we-"

"I know, ridiculous of me, forget I even said it."

"Not ridiculous," he was shaking his head, moving closer.

"I'm just talking about stress release, Robinavitch," she said lightly, moving to tap his arm awkwardly, trying to play it off. "You know, it's just easier to do with someone who knows how shit today was," she shook her head. "If you don't want to, that's totally ok, no pressure or anything."

He opened his mouth and closed it a few times, looking at her, finally his hand going to the back of his neck to rub it. "Yeah," he nodded. "I'd like that."

So she led him towards her place, his hand finding hers, firm and reassuring as they were entwined as they got up the stairs and into the brownstone. Moving up the next set of stairs. But her hands were shaking as she tried to find the right key for her apartment. Feeling as if he was tall and wide behind her. His heat radiated on her back.

"Take your time," he whispered into her ear, sending a shiver down her spine. "Relax," his voice rough and low. His hand squeezed hers. Her hand shaking as arousal coursed through her, she finally fumbled to get the key into the lock, opening it and letting both of them in.

"Do you want a coffee?" she asked, smiling. Dropping her own bag and kicking off her shoes quickly. She didn't even bother turning on the lights. Letting her eyes adjust to the darkness.

She heard him chuckle low, closing the door behind him, dropping his own bag beside hers, and kicking his own shoes off. "No," he said with amusement.

His hands found her and pulled her closer to him. His mouth found hers quickly as his hand went to the back of her head, holding her against him. He consumed her, his tongue slipping into her mouth as she moaned. Her breathing became heavy, her hands clutching at him.

Finally, breaking the kiss, his hand pushed her hair behind her shoulder. He moved, kissing her jaw as her hands came to unzip his hoodie.

"We-" another moan escaped her. "Should have ground rules."

"Ground rules?" he asked, his lips against her skin.

"Yeah," she whispered. They worked together to get his hoodie off. His hand slipped under the hem of her scrub top, feeling the skin just above her pants. "Everyone knows about your 7 week itch."

He moved back, his hands guiding her arms up to help lift her scrub top, then her t-shirt. Followed by his own scrub top and white t-shirt. His chain against his skin. She grasped it, pulling him back to her, their mouths finding each other as his hands moved to undo her bra.

"I take offense to that," he said against her lips. Getting the bra unlatched and pulled off. Her own hands find his chest. "Who's calling me that?"

"Every coworker you've fucked," she couldn't help the small laugh that was cut short by his hand going to her breast, fingers playing with her nipple. He moved, kissing his way down her chest until his mouth replaced his hand. Licks and sucks while his hand moved to the other, repeating the process. "Fuck, Robby."

"You wanna make it a thing?" he asked, moving his mouth to give attention to her other nipple.

"M-more than once?" she asked, her hand going to the back of his head, playing with the hair there.

He pulled away, looking up at her. "Don't you?" he asked curiously, as he pulled at the waistband of her scrub pants. A smile so playful she couldn't help but smile back. He moved to place kisses on her stomach and lower, to her waistband, so adoringly that it made her blush. He moved his kisses back up her body until he reached her lips.

His hand replaced where his mouth had been above the band, tracing the area, causing goosebumps on her skin. She scoffed as the shiver ran through her, "You don't even know if it'll be good?"

In the dark, she could see his smirk. A shaking inhale left her as his hand slipped beneath. "Well, that's a defeatist attitude," his fingers tracing over her entrance through her panties, she knew they were soaked. "I'll make sure it's good."

Her breath hitched as he continued to add pressure to his touch, but never touching her clit. She shook her head, "Overconfidence."

"We were discussing ground rules, remember?" he said tauntingly as he returned to her neck. His fingers maintained a steady rhythm, continuing to avoid the area she needed. "Or did you forget what we were doing?"

"Just sex," she pulled his face back to hers, a consuming kiss as she tried to ground down on his hand.

"No strings," he said against her lips.

"Honesty," her body tried to chase his fingers, his mouth absorbing every pant. "The other person has to say if they're starting to date someone, it stops. No cheating."

"No feelings," his fingers finally going to her clothed clit, adding friction as he created a circular motion. Her moans got louder.

"Obviously."

He continued, pulling back, watching as her eyes were getting heavy, trying to focus. "If one of us starts having feelings, it stops immediately."

She couldn't focus; she was so fucking close. "Agreed," she managed to get out in a pant. Her hands on his chest, scratching to try and hold on. "Not at work, no one else is to know."

"Agreed," he moved, nipping her jaw.

Finally, he gave her eye contact as she panted. Words were getting harder. "I'm clean, got tested after Alex. On the pill,"

"Clean, I can use a condom if you want,"

Her brain was going fuzzy, her body feeling so fucking good. "Do you have one?" she whispered.

"Not on me, you?" his tongue on her neck licking its length. Fuck.

"No," her breath escaped as a whine. Her head fell back, her eyes shutting as her body tensed. Her fingers moved to his shoulders, holding on for life, her nails digging into his skin as her climax took over.

He held her there, his fingers still working her as she panted, his mouth finding every inch of skin he could reach. She was vaguely aware of the praises whispered against her skin.

He removed his hand from her pants, his other hand coming to the back of her head as he lifted to look at her. "Are you ok with that?"

"If you are," she whispered whistfully. She was vaguely aware as she was pushed against the wall. Watching as he dropped to his knees in front of her. His hands quickly worked the waistband of both her scrubs and panties, pulling both down at the same time. She watched as he looked up at her, desire on his face.

"You don't have-" before the sentence was out, he was placing a small kiss on her cunt, watching her reaction. He did it again before he was sliding his hand to a thigh, lifting it so it was over his shoulder. Moving closer as his tongue began broad strokes. "Jesus fucking hell," escaped her lips as her head shot back, thankfully missing the wall as his tongue and mouth began to explore.

She understood now, as her hand went back into his hair. She understood why the girls were upset when he left.

"Getting you ready, sweetheart," he said, his face buried in her, his licking continued. His voice vibrated through her. "You taste so fucking good."

His fingers were there, stroking the inside of her thigh as her legs shook to hold her up, before finally his middle finger was tracing her slit. Finally sliding inside.

"Robby, please, fucking please," she cried, trying to chase his finger and tongue. Feeling a second finger slide inside, stretching her. Moving in and out, curling into the most delicious spot. His mouth went to her clit, sucking as a third finger was being added, continuing to pump into her as her body shook. Every time she looked down to meet his eyes, her whole body shook, watching as his expression became heated, as if it turned him on to see her come undone.

"You're so wet," his voice vibrating against her. "Squeeze my fingers," he looked up with a smug grin as he watched her for a moment before he brought his mouth back to her, tracing circles on her clit with his tongue. "Cum for me." That did it, a cry being let out as her body convulsed, clamping down on his fingers as she rode a high he was causing. Her whole body released as she gripped him. He moaned into her as he licked at her release.

"I need you, Robby, please," he didn't need telling twice. He pulled away from her, moving to kiss the thigh on his shoulder. sucking and licking to leave a mark before he removed his fingers from her, and moving her leg off his shoulder. Standing, she watched mesmerized as he licked his fingers clean.

Yeah, she absolutely understood the people at work now.

His hands dropped finally to push his pants and boxers off, freeing his cock. Sydney couldn't help the moan that escaped her as she watched him pump himself with a few strokes before he moved closer. His hands went to grasp her thighs, giving a pleasant squeeze.

"Hold onto my neck," he said, waiting as she did what she was told before his hands at her thighs were lifting them, guiding them around his waist. Once she was secured, he moved one hand on the wall for stability as the other moved to guide his cock to her entrance. Slowly and controlled, he pushed in, both of them trying to watch as he sank in. Both groaning as her walls tightly clung around him.

"So full," she felt so fucking surrounded by him. Clenching down as he continued to sink slowly.

"Taking me so good, Syd," he whispered into her, moving his hips to help work his way into her. Finally, fucking finally, he was fully seated.

"Please, Robby," she said, almost having tears in her eyes, her insides throbbing around him. "Move," she pulled his mouth back to her for a sloppy kiss.

He pistoned his hips in and out of her, with quick, deep thrusts. His eyes watched hers before sliding down to watch as her breasts moved with every thrust.

"Feel good?" he said, "Like my cock in you? Filling you so good?" his mouth returned to her neck.

"Mmhmm," was all she could manage through her panting, her nails clawing at his shoulders and back. He'd have scratches in the morning for sure. Her body feeling so good, she never wanted it to end as he moved inside her, hitting every spot she needed. Her breath was coming out in pants at every thrust. His mouth on her, his one hand exploring her skin. "I'm close, Robby," she moaned.

"Cum for me," he managed through his pants, his mouth going to her shoulder, kissing and nipping her skin, "Let go, baby."

He thrust in as she burst, a loud moan escaping her as he thrusted and ground in. Her body bowed. He continued his grinding, his hand going to her hip, ensuring he was deep inside. His own climax took over, spilling into her.

He moved forward, his forehead on her shoulder as they stood there. The sound of them trying to catch their breath filled the space.

"Holy shit," she whispered, a small laugh escaping her after some time had passed.

"What's so funny? Hurting my ego here," he whispered into her ear, amused.

"Just the absurdity," she let out a laugh again. "Fucking you," her hands feeling his back, clutching him to her. "I've never fucked against a wall before, so that's new."

He raised his head to look at her, "Never?"

Sydney shook her head. "We should probably shower," she whispered, moving to kiss his lips gently. "Wanna join?"

He nodded, slowly and gingerly pulling out, helping her lower her legs. Sydney groaned as the soreness ran through them. Her arms removed themselves from his neck, giving her space to move, leading him down the hall to the bathroom.

Hitting the shower on, getting in as they quietly began cleaning each other like it was routine. Bodies scrubbed and cleaned. Small kisses were exchanged every so often as hands massaged skin. Sydney moaned as he poured shampoo into her hair and massaged her scalp.

"Alex used to do this for you?" he asked, his voice cutting through her daze.

"Do what?" she hummed.

"Clean you after you fucked,"

"No,"

"Wow," she heard the astonishment and judgment in his voice, and she opened her eyes to look at him.

"What?"

He gave a smirk and a shrug, gently guiding her head slightly back to get her hair in the stream of the shower, rinsing the shampoo out. "Just interesting."

"Condescending much?"

"Can I add after care to the rules?" he asked, grabbing the conditioner, taking a small amount, rubbing it into his hands, and then into her mid and ends.

"Yeah," she whispered as he placed a kiss on the top of her head. Her body was too relaxed. "I'd like that."

They finished up, wrapping themselves in towels as she moved to the bedroom to get her pajamas, and he went to his backpack, grabbing the extra clothes he kept in it. Quickly, he pulled everything on.

"I should go," he said with a smile, but Sydney could sense his hesitancy. The warmth of the shower disappeared. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah," She replied, the newness of the situation setting in. "Are you? Okay, I mean."

He gave her a reassuring smile. "Yeah, I'll see you tomorrow?"

"Yeah," she replied with a nod, watching him as he moved out the door, and he was gone, closing the door behind him.