#falice

It must be really hard for those two brothers in the summer i turned pretty to be going after the same girl but imagine you’re dating a boy and your mom starts dating his dad but it’s not the first time your mom and his dad had a fling— they had one in high school that resulted in a son. so you share a half brother with your boyfriend and also that half brother used to be an fbi agent but is now a serial killer that married a different serial killer that was puppeteered by your cousins homophobic (and gay) mother and he pretended to be your half brother for a while and lived in your house. As always betty cooper’s life is harder

Fucking Alice antagonizing Hal when he admitted he was the Black Hood and she was like “you motherfucking pussy, you mamas boy, please kill yourself, you suck at being a serial killer, my high school sweethearts dick is bigger than yours” LIKE DAMMMMM she’s my favourite character

riverdale got me fucked up. i'm thinking about straight white cis sex between two fifty years old divorcees on company time.