#ex jw

Sooo I was having a "conversation" with my dad after dinner and he started talking about his religious bullshit again and how I should be thankful for never seeing the world, how girls my age got pregnant and how everyone was violent and hated eachother so much (son)

He also confidently said that mental ill people just had demons inside and that's just... eww??? There's no fucking way he believes my late grandma who was diagnosed with schizophrenia to just have a fucking demon inside her (I'm sorry I love the word fucking) one of the reasons I'm scared to vent to him is because 1) he will bring the religious bullshit 2) SUDDENLY I HAVE 7 DEMONS INSIDE I fucking hate how ableist he is, how he believes everything can be fixed with god and being positive while that's what I did for more than 10 years just to end with my mental health getting worse EVERY day.

He told me that everyone outside the org was unhappy and depressed and gave me the example of a guy who left the org to be a musician and he was so depressed and missed the org and I DON'T KNOW BRO, maybe because leaving the cult forces others to ignore you and that's why he missed it, not because it was good but because he had nobody? but it always has to be about jehovah and some shit

anyways go teach my dad there's good people in the world

and that we are part of the world

also phone case reveal!!!

I'm bringing treble and whippa since they're my biggest comfort characters I would bring mousse too but he's stuck in my binder and I can't get him out too lazy to print a new mousse...

not sure if anyone will see this what i don’t really care. i guess i just want a place to talk about whatever i want whenever i want. if you can relate to my life and what i talk about give me a follow.

anyways pretty much im going through a mid twenties crisis, i turned 25 this year and i know im still young but looking at my peers i feel so behind in life and i feel like im at my lowest ever. im crazy fat, unemployed, no savings, no car, living at home and stuck at home job searching. im basically trying to rebuilding my life.

also i left a religious cult (jw) that ive been in for about 10 years about a year ago. im so happy i left its the best thing i have ever done and i have never been happier. but with leaving ive been trying to rebuild my whole life. thankfully i still have my friends from other walks of life and make new friends. i still miss having a community but im grateful im starting to find my people but i have missed out on alot i never really dated or done the normal stuff you do as a teen or young adult - so its a weird time for me bc i feel like im supposed to be this grown adult and have everything figured out but i feel like this is my first time living life fr lol. so im trying to discover myself and date.

BUT i dont want this account to be a depressing, self pitying account. i want to genuinely turn my life around and actually live for myself. i want to do want i want and make myself the number one priority.

i want to work on losing weight, improve my appearance, make new friends, find a new community and be a better friend. i want to move into a new career and honestly make money and buy and do whatever tf i want. but with that take discipline and dedication and i need to stop being lazy and laying in bed.

so yeah that what this account is about could be no one sees this but i feel like talking about this out loud and putting my intentions, wants, desires and goals into the universe 🧿. i want this account to hold me accountable and document my life.

btw this account isn’t anonymous or really secret, if you want to chat and get to know who i am im open and friendly. i just dont want post my face on here yet because im in the corporate world but im thinking of starting a yt channel and tiktok to vlog my daily life. i’ll link them soon if you want to follow.

some of my interests: