bad morning

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bad morning

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okay so i see a lot of people talking about “i wish i had two lives: one for god, and one for you” / “i wish i had two lives: both for you” and like god, yes, so sickeningly romantic in the best way. but i just want to talk about the implications. like it really does make me a little insane.
first, david's putting her on the same level as god?! the priority, devotion, belief, love. kristen is saying 'yes, i understand,' she wants both too. she loves their work, she's happy to follow him around investigating miracles & possessions & demons. even as a non-believer, a lapsed catholic. it's one of those 'it doesn't matter if i believe in god, i believe in you' things (VERY mulder/scully coded and it's eating me alive)
like THATS CRAZY!
and because i haven't been seeing anything about it: ben piping in and kristen saying another for ben too just MELTS me. i know david & kristen's relationship is more to the fore, but like. BEN. the things he does for kristen without question, without judgment. if there's anything, it's only concern & care for her, and kristen loves ben so much. i can't actually picture david & kristen without ben there, and i don't think they really can either. they've really created a family together.
It is almost a relief to believe in evil again, knowing at last that for some things there is no excuse.
Marian Engel, Sarah Bastard's Notebook
The people that do not like you the most are the ones who are watching you the most. Their observations are not intended for positive reasons. Their intentions are to find your faults and weaknesses. Pause for a moment, and you will visualize who most of them are.
"Sometimes, you have to make hard decisions for those you love to save them. It's a worthy cause to die being a parent, after all. And far more evil."
Tentative line, probably won't be the same once getting to it, Zurg, (well, a variant of him) Reaching for Infinity ( and failing)

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Evil Roger
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“I can't exist by myself because I'm afraid of myself, because I'm the maker of my own evil.”
By Hellen
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Evil is unspectacular and always human, and shares our bed and eats at our own table.
WH Auden