#evil deku

You worked the graveyard shift inside of the extensive and illegal underground experimentation facility.  When you earned your doctorate and began working as an Obstetrics & Gynecology Doctor of Nursing Practice with a Certified Nurse Midwife certification; you gained fast notoriety in the field for your outstanding contributions to research. You had a natural passion for helping women throughout the entirety of their labor and delivery process; seeing the happiness that a new life brought them, answering their questions, soothing their new-mother anxieties.

Your tunnel vision was trained to be so tight, that when you celebrated your eighth year as a licensed practitioner, you took at step back and realized you hadn’t made much time for any kind of romance of your own.  You loved the patients you worked with, and you loved their little ones; but you came home alone at the end of every night and it was beginning to nag at you like an uncomfortable thorn in your side that you couldn’t reach. 

“Try Bumble!” a close friend suggested.

You had a few dead-end dates and one night stands that seemed to turn you off from men entirely.  Impressive as it seemed, it was an unfortunate prank God played for you to be in the field of sexual reproduction and encounter males who would starvingly lick at your right labia, shaking their heads like dogs and looking up at you to ask;

‘You like that baby?’

“No!” You would think silently, “You’re giving me rug burn on my fucking pussy lip.  Do you even know what a clitoris is?”

‘Oh yeah, mm’  You would drone out a bogus moan.

“Maybe I’m asexual…” You seriously considered the possibility as you pulled your camel colored double breasted coat closed, ducking into the local coffee shop to grab your lunchtime latte and bagel.

You were so distracted by your phone, trying to multi-task several apps, that when you reached for the wrong coffee and felt another hand, you looked up, a bit jarred into the green eyes of the handsome stranger, who was also distracted, his phone in his other hand.

You look down at the drink and realize it read:

‘Izuku’

“Oh, I’m so sorry.” You gesture to your phone, “I’m like…addicted to my phone.” Your social anxiety is ramping up from the one or two people standing around, noticing the mistake and watching everything go down.

“It’s fine.” He gave a wry smile, “It’s just four shots of espresso, you wouldn’t have enjoyed it, or I’d offer it to you.” He brings the cup to his lips, giving you a wink as he takes a sip.

‘Alright, I’m defintiely not asexual…’ you conclude to yourself.

“Dirty Chai with four shots of espresso for Y/N.” The barista slides your drink out.  Izuku lifts a brow.

You hold it up to your lips, unable to hide your tiny grin, “I’d offer it to you, but you probably wouldn’t enjoy it.” You take a sip and he chuckles.  Suddenly, you can tell something catches his eye as he slightly tilts his head to read your cup.

“Y/N.  Like…Dr. Y/N? Guardian Medical Center?” He asks curiously.

“Yep, that’s me.  Do I know you?”

He extends his hand, “Forgive me, I should’ve introduced myself earlier.  I’m Izuku Midoriya–”

“Oh!” You shake his hand, “Dr. Izuku Midoriya from Bayhealth Hospital?” You hold up your phone, “I was literally just reading your recent published study on infertile women and the failure of assisted reproductive technologies.” You begin to babble excitedly.  Izuku was the head physician in Obstetrics at Bayhealth, and his work was revered by many.

He’s tickled by your enthusiasm, and impressed by your knowledge, and you two sit down and begin to pick each other’s brains.  When your phone finally alerts you that it’s the end of your lunch break, he asks for your information to keep in touch.  

Later that week, after late nights and early mornings spent talking on the phone about all kinds of things that other people simply wouldn’t understand, he asks you on a formal date.  You’re nervous, but excited.  He takes you to an elegant, upscale restaurant; but the entire evening that you two spend huddled over exquisitely prepared food and bottles of wine with dizzying price tags attached to them, your thoughts are far from elegant and upscale.

Your foot is sliding up and down his outer leg and his thumb is stroking the top of your hand as he holds it across the table, both of you in deep conversation.  The chemistry was instantaneously enchanting.  Izuku was a brilliant man, that was for certain; but he was also well-spoken, charming, experienced, confident and gifted.  You were shocked he had even asked you on a date to begin with—for the simple fact that you assumed he was well into an established marriage.

Yet here he was, wooing you over delicious food, getting you dangerously tipsy from wine, and sending tiny prickles of anticipatory anxiety through the veins atop your hand that he languidly stroked.

It was absolutely no surprise that you two were driven back to his place, and spent the night in the throes of a brand-new passion.  

And oh god, did Izuku know how to touch you.  He stroked, licked and touched you in all of the right places; his ministrations delivering the pleasure you had sought for so many years from a partner.  It was so incredibly overwhelming; but you figured perhaps it was just the intensity of it being the first time.

Sure, it was no surprise that you two fucked that night.

And sure, given his chosen career, it could be said that it wasn’t a surprise that he could over-adequately please you.

No, the first surprise for you set in when he was able to bring you bubbling up and over in pure ecstasy, for the entirety of the relationship.  It wasn’t humanly possible, for him to be this accurate and precise every-single-time; it seemed with time he only seemed to understand your specific body more, and thusly would tune himself closer to your intimate energy.

You never saw yourself as someone who could be addicted to…well much of anything; but you developed a hardcore one for your partner, the incomparable Doctor Izuku Midoriya; and he indulged you whenever you pleased.

After a year together, he proposes to you, atop the roof of the Eiffel Tower in Paris.  Izuku was very traditionally romantic, and loved to spoil you in lavish ways.  It felt like a storybook romance to you, and sure it took until you were 34 for it to happen, but it finally happened.  With Izuku you felt like you had shared previous lifetimes together.  You were deeply and…unfortunately, dangerously in love with him; and he returned it ten fold, wildly in love with you.

After eloping in Santorini a few months later, you two settled into a domestic life that went normally for another year.

Then the second surprise came.

He drops the bomb.

Over dinner at home.

“Babe, I’ve been working on a new experimental fertility drug.” He says, eyes coming up from his plate and looking at you across the table.  The green hue in them seems to darken.

“Really? That’s incredible babe, why didn’t you tell me?” Your excitement knocks down a couple notches, “Why don’t you sound more excited about it?”

“Because, I love you.” He removes the black napkin from his lap and stands up, setting it down over his empty plate.  You feel a little nervousness creeping up inside of you as you give him a puzzled expression.  

His demeanor was foreign, and difficult to read sometimes.  It was rare; but it happened on occasion.  

He seemed emotionless, and that alerted your instinct to be on guard.

Izuku slowly makes his way around the table over to you.  He gently slides your plate away and rests against the edge of the table.

You look up at him, concerned.  “Is everything okay, Izuku?” You reach out to touch his arm, looking up at him.  If something was weighing on him, you would do anything to take some of it off for him.  His job was already difficult enough, additional research surely was no easy task.

“I love you, and I don’t want to lose you after I show you this.”

You never imagined he would introduce you to a 432,000 square foot professional level research facility hidden underground where he kept 100 women as test subjects.  He needed your professional and personal help to oversee the experiments, maintain the health of the patients, and assist with data collection and analysis.

You maintained a poker face when he first brought you into the facility and showed you the drugged women in clear plexiglass rooms.  Each ‘cell’ had a toilet privately behind a sheer white, sterile curtain, a mounted stainless steel sink against the wall and a small, plain twin sized bed with a blanket.  There was a shower stall behind the curtain alongside the toilet.  Each room was designed with no ligature risks, to prevent suicide by way of hanging.  There were solid walls between rooms, preventing them from seeing each other, but allowing full visuals of the staff.

“Izuku.” You finally squeak once he had finished giving you the entire tour and had returned to his private office.

“Are these women here against their will?” You ask.

His eyes flash for a moment, he moistens his lips with his tongue before he says, with an unhinged smile, “Some are.”

There is silence between you for a few seconds.

You can feel your leg bouncing on the balls of your foot as hot tears start to well up in your eyes.

“Are you fucking these women?” You ask in a low voice.

His face becomes unreadably blank again.  “Yes.”

You feel your heart breaking as you stand up and rush at him, angrily pinning him against the wall; desperate to force him to ‘feel’ something, anything.  Had he been pretending this entire time to feel something for you that he didn’t? Did he plot to use you from the very beginning once he discovered who you were?

You felt your heart rate climbing as your eyes darted back and forth across his face, trying to read him for anything as you both breathed heavily.  He’s watching you underneath half-lidded eyes, the corner of his mouth curling up into a grin.

“You’re so hot when you get jealous like this.” He breathes.

Your focus wavers for a moment before you regain it again, “If I’m so ‘hot’ then why the fuck–” You slam his pinned wrists against the wall, reasserting yourself as you stare him down.  “–do you have 100 fucking bitches here that you’re trying to fucking breed!?”

“I’m helping them baby, can’t you see that?” He chooses to play up a noble role now, giving you innocent eyes as his voice softens.  

“I’m going to perfect this drug until it can cure the reason for their unexplained infertility.  I need your help to study the early developmental stages of the fetus; then we euthanize the mother and I can perform an exploratory necropsy and find out more about how the drug affects the child’s development.  I’ve been working on this for four years now and I’ve made leaps and bounds in my research.” He elucidates.

“I’m going to help women be able to conceive.  This is a beautiful experiment baby, don’t you see that?”

You didn’t notice that your grip had loosened until he pulls his hand away and gently caresses your cheek.  “You’re the one I want to have a family with.”

You feel many emotions wash over you simultaneously.  Here, the love of your life stood in front of you, professing his heinous and sadistic side-project to you, trusting you with his biggest secret.  You could end his entire career and have him behind bars for the rest of his life.  

Of course, Izuku was too smart for that, he’d never let you leave alive.

But you can’t deny the fear creeping up inside of you when you realized that you didn’t want to leave.

You didn’t want to turn away from the joy, acceptance and familiarity that had introduced into your life; and you wanted a family with him too, that part was certain.

You release his other wrist and break your eye contact with him.  “Do you mean that?” you murmur, feeling yourself soften under his spell.

He brushes his lips past yours, nuzzling your nose and pressing his forehead against you.  “I would put a baby in you right now if you’d let me.” His arms slink around your waist and pull you close to him against the wall.

You can’t help the smile that breaks out as your bite your lip, leaning into his chest to kiss him.  As your tongues collide, his hands travel up your back, caressing the back of your neck, deepening your kiss.

You accept now that you’re not going anywhere.

You were hopelessly and unavailingly devoted to your husband and his vision. Even before he was your husband, you practically inhaled his published journals and worked them into your practice at the medical center.  You had a reverence and respect for him that went beyond love.  You were going to stand by him every step of the way; if not for the sake of science, but to be able to keep a watchful eye on him and the test subjects.

In a few months you become accustomed to the unique exigencies your job entails.  You come in at night, walking from cube to cube, an encrypted computer on wheels in front of you as you type in observations.  You quickly learn that the women here have been almost ‘trained’.  When it came time for nightly vitals, you would walk in with security and they would mutely hand you their arm for blood pressures, willingly take thermometers into their mouths for temperatures, and allow you to administer injections when necessary.

At first, you tried to not make eye contact with them, interacting as little as possible; but as your job progressed, a scorned loathing began to sit in.  

You tried to keep yourself stable, but the environment, combined with the strange dynamic it proposed on your marriage and your complex double life, began to change your actions.  You started out as a compassionate nurse with impeccable bedside manner, and it translated well into your position as a Doctor of Nursing Practice; but that was all erased when you were in the lab.

You started getting a little more rough when grabbing an arm for a blood pressure.

Jabbed a woman under her tongue, moving with too much hostility as you tried to get a temperature.

Giving injections was more of a way to release your anger.  A rough jab, and a push that was too quick, caused the drug to burn as it penetrated into the muscle.

Two security guards would hold the women down for you.  As they grew more difficult over time, anticipating your pugnacity, you take it upon yourself to sedate them more so they would cooperate.  You didn’t inform Izuku of this, he didn’t have to know.  It wasn’t as if he cared for the welfare of the women anyhow, no matter how much he claimed he did.  He would go into these rooms, shut the privacy curtain, and fuck 1-3 test subjects per night.  You would sit in the observation booth above and watch from the cameras meticulously positioned in the room.

You simple minded whores.  You don’t realize how gracious I’ve been, allowing my husband to fuck you all senselessly like this.  

Sure, some women accepted it as a part of the sadistic experiment, but I could tell some others loved it.  They were desperate to conceive, blissfully unaware of their impending death if they happened to beat the odds.  

Luckily, none had beat any odds yet.

You began to realize you may have accidentally fallen in love with a sociopath.  

“Good evening sweetheart.” Izuku has arrived for the night shortly after you’ve finished the vitals.  You’re sitting in his office, typing notes into the computer as he hangs up his wool pea coat on the rack and pulls on his white lab coat.  He places his black framed eyeglasses on as he comes over to the desk to peer over your shoulder.  You sit back in the chair with a sigh and he kisses your cheek.

“Everything alright?” He asks.

“Yeah, just had a difficult day at work.” You say, irritable.

“Number 94’s been having some respiratory issues and should probably be quarantined.  14 has been unusually lethargic and–” You lean forward at the computer to see the next line of text,

“29 had abnormally high blood pressure but I’m running diagnostics on her bloodwork now.  I gave 1.25mgs of Enalapril IV over five minutes.  She’s being monitored now.” You finish reporting.  

You don’t mention the sedatives you’ve been dealing out.

Izuku nods.  “I know everyone’s in good hands when I leave you in charge.” He beams.  “I’m proud of you sweetheart, you’re doing a fantastic job.”

You feel your heart swell as your energy levels perk up a little bit at his praise. “Thank you love.”

He runs a hand through his green hair before flattening the collar of his lab coat, checking his breast pocket for his pens.  “No, sweetheart.” His eyes meet yours, the ghost of a smile on his lips.

“Thank you.” He gives you a sultry, sexy, lengthy kiss.  “I’m going to get set up.  We’re focusing on patient 4.  Her cycle is a week late.” He leaves the office promptly and you sit there, your stomach in knots.

You had been here a long while, and this experiment had been progressing long before you came into the picture and not one woman had successfully conceived.  Every woman had an established menses in the facility, so their ovulation was tracked and trials were ran accordingly.

But again, nobody had produced a viable pregnancy; and Izuku just casually mentions today that patient number four was a week late on her period?  A lump materializes in your throat that you try to swallow as you stand up, taking a deep breath, bringing your white lab coat down from the hook, and placing it on.

Shit, shit, shit.

Why were you so nervous? It’s not like it mattered if she was pregnant or not, she was going to die anyhow.  But if she was...if she was, then that would make Izuku the happiest he’s probably ever been.  

His experiment would be a success, what could make him happier than that?

You make your way to the observation deck, your heels clicking against the tiled floor.  The routine was deeply engrained into you at this point, as you slid your keycard into the door and ventured inside.  You took your seat in front of the 3 monitors on the table.  The windows were deeply tinted, preventing prying eyes from seeing things they shouldn’t.  

You cross your arms with pinched lips as you watch your husband walk into the cell.  The woman is sedated, but seems to be smiling and nodding a lot.

Is she…happy about this?

Surely she doesn’t believe Izuku would allow her to bear his child.

You become unsure of yourself, your thoughts bordering on partial delusion as you start tapping your pen against the desk as a nervous habit, your legs crossed, ankle bouncing mindlessly.

Surely Izuku wouldn’t allow her to bear his child.

This was just for the purposes of finding a cure for unexplained infertility.  He didn’t love these women, he didn’t–

Your thoughts stopped as you watched him take off his lab coat, dressed in his usual attire—a black cashmere sweater and black pants, with a dark brown leather belt.  He sits on the edge of the bed and reaches out, placing his hand on her upper thigh as they talk.

Their voices are low and muffled and you can’t make out what’s being said from the distance of the camera.  The woman nods with another smile and he leans forward…and kisses her!

You lean forward in disbelief, watching the entire thing go down.  You’re stuck, paralyzed, it’s like watching a train wreck.  You watch as he climbs atop her, unbuckling his belt, pulling down his pants and proceeds to fuck her.

Her cries of pleasure can be easily picked up by the camera’s microphone and your face begins to grow hot.

Why is he fucking her like this?!

Like…like he means it or something?!

Your adrenaline is building as you begin to fan yourself with your hand from how hot you’re getting with violent rage.  

“Keep your cool, Y/N, she’s just a lab rat.” You say through gritted teeth.

Your fists tighten on the desk, “She’s just a lab rat.” You say again.

He kisses her again, while snapping his hips into her with restless abandon.

“No.” You finally slam your fist down so hard, the pain reverberates down the side of your hand into your wrist bone, only adding gallons of fuel to your already raging fire.  You approach the door, sliding your keycard and swinging it open with a ‘bang’ as it hits the wall before slowly returning back to close once you’re almost halfway down the hall.  

You make your way to the cell of patient number four and slide your keycard, allowing you access into the room.  The patient startles, covering her breasts, and Izuku sits up on his knees, raising his eyebrows at you, his abdomen slick and shiny, shamelessly unconcerned about his nudity.

“Dr. Midoriya, you’re needed urgently in the observation deck.” You say, cords rigid in your neck as you try to maintain your cool.  

His eyes narrow suspiciously but he disregards it and addresses the confused patient on the bed.  “Let’s pick this back up again tomorrow evening, alright?”

“Yes Doctor.” The woman replies with an enthusiastic nod, pulling her sheets up to cover her body as he gives you a darkened, knowing look, getting dressed again.  

Once his lab coat is on, you spin around on your heel and click back down the hall and he follows, tucking his glasses into his pocket.  You two share no conversation as the journey is made to the deck.  Once you both step through the threshold, you turn around and slap him across the face.  At this point, tears are streaming down your face as you bite your lip so hard, you begin to taste the metallic of blood-tinged saliva spreading over your tongue.

He’s holding the spot you just slapped as he gradually stands back up.  You shove him and he wavers a few steps backwards.  There’s that stupid fucking unidentifiable expression again, as if his brain had to take a moment to think of a human emotion to conjure.  Before he can find one, you reach for another slap, but he grabs your arm.  You rage forward anyhow, taking your free hand and beating a fist into his chest as you release all of your pent up aggression and jealousy.  Before he can fall back completely, he wraps you in a restrained embrace.

“Shh, calm down sweetheart, take it easy.” He tries to speak in a calm tone.  You won’t stop violently throwing your body around in his grasp, desperately trying to release yourself.  

Finally, understanding you weren’t giving up easily, Izuku uses force and throws your body up against the nearest wall, pressing his body fully against you so you have no time to recover and pull yourself away.  It gives you time to consider your actions, as you two glower at each other, chests heaving and touching with every inhale.

Your neck is gripped by Izuku as he kisses you, forcing his tongue down your throat, swallowing your moans and the taste of your blood.  Your hand palms against his erection and he pushes into your touch, retracting from your heated kiss to breathe.  His face is reddened with the rush of blood, his green hair tousled.  He hikes your leg up around his waist and suckles the skin on your collarbone.  Your breath hitches as you feel the blood collecting underneath his sucking.  You feel like you’re seeing stars as you melt under his touch.  

He lets go of you and drops to his knees, tossing your leg over his shoulder as he lifts your skirt up, looking up at you with a carnal, predatory stare.  The air in the observation deck is thick with desire, both of you impulsive, animalistic, and madcap in a tangled web of twisted emotions.  

Really, fuck Izuku.  Was he so harebrained that he didn’t realize that you wanted to keep him selfishly to yourself? That you had only joined this research team to make him happy, to be the one thing in his life that finally made him feel something real for once?  To show him you were just as good a peer as you were a lover and wife?

His fingers hook around your panties, and with a surprising force, he rips them off, the fabric leaving a painful burn against your hips.  You open your mouth, about to protest against the pain, when you feel him rubbing your inner thighs, nuzzling your mound.  Your head falls back against the wall as your hips move forward.  You feel your clit rubbing against the bridge of his nose as his tongue delves into you, swirling against your walls before dragging up to your hot, pulsating clit.  It all felt so sinfully fucking sexy, the way he was taming you by forcing you to succumb to pleasure only he could give you.

“Oh god, oh god, oh fuck.” You tremble, one hand tangled in his hair, the other trying to hold yourself up against the wall.  You begin to ride his face, feeling your lower stomach tightening as you grip his hair tighter, rubbing your clit at the perfect angle against his tongue.  He stays still, his hand wrapped around your outer thigh that rested upon his shoulder, palm gently rubbing back and forth, adding to the sensations that were pushing you over the edge at a wild speed.

“You’re gonna make me cum–” You strangle, your back arching as you press your head against the wall, your hips bucking wildly onto his tongue.  The heated coil that was winding in your stomach comes undone.  You chase your orgasm, screaming out his name as you grip his head with both of your hands, smothering him with your cunt as you ride it out until you’re erratically jerking from overstimulation.  You feel his tongue creeping up your slit and you pull your hips backwards, trying to retrieve your breath as he stands back up, licking his lips greedily, relishing every last drop of your nectar that was smeared over his nose, mouth and chin.  You grip him underneath his chin, squeezing tightly.

“Get on the fucking floor Izuku.” You push him back his head snapping back as he stumbles backwards.  He begins pulling off his clothes as he lays down while you climb atop him.  You straddle him, allowing his cock to run up and down your slit, slipping against your swollen clit once every few thrusts.  You tormented him, slicking your wet arousal all over his cock as he pulls you by your hips, trying to slide you forward more so he can slip inside of you.

“Ah, ah.” You slow down to an almost painful stop,  “I’m going to fuck you, don’t worry.” You give him a devious smile and his brow knits in sexual frustration as his hips grind up, a shiny drop of pre-cum oozing from the tip of his beautiful cock.  He’s studying you with a focused gaze as you lift yourself so the head of his cock is sitting right at your entrance.

“You know…” You pause, rubbing him against your entrance.  It makes you even wetter, making him suffer like this.  “I’m ovulating right now...” You slide down barely a quarter of an inch, slowly winding your hips so the very tip of his dick is the only thing being stimulated. “Do you want me to give you a daughter?” You ask, voice sweet and soft as you lean over him and drop down another half an inch.

“Fuck yes.” He’s breathing so heavily, its almost whimpers now.  You feel his grip tighten on your hips and he tries to push you down and you lift your hips back up.

“Mm…what if I give you a son instead? Someone to pass your legacy on…” You lower your hips, moving them back and forth as you agonizingly inch your way down to the base of his cock.

“Please…” he groans, “Please don’t say that unless you mean it...” He pushes up further and you feel him deep inside of you, nearly at your cervix from the angle you were at.  You rest your hands on his chest, leaning over his face and watching him, his mouth partly agape as you start bouncing your ass on him, your thighs smacking against his.

“These women, these...lab rats.” Your right hand travels up his chest to his neck.  “They don’t deserve your first born.”

“That’s my job.” Your head throws back as he brings the thick pad of his thumb up to circle your clit as you ride him.  “Please fucking breed me.” You keen, staring into his eyes.

“My…fucking…pleasure.” His vision is glossed over, face and body flushed as he desperately pumps into you, bottoming out, murmuring and moaning out as he’s being fucked dumb by your cunt, slurping his cock up greedily, wet squelching noises filling the room.  His hand returns to your hips as he rocks into you.  He’s grinding his pubic bone against your clit and you’re panting, lost in lust, your tongue lolling out as desperate cries fell from your lips.

“Yes...” he hisses, back arching as he snaps his hips into you more, bringing his thumb back down to pay closer attention to your clit this time.  He selfishly relishes in the feeling of your cunt wrapping tighter around him when he circles your bud.  He adds a little more pressure and your hips involuntarily buck forward as you lose your rhythm.

“That’s what I want.” He praises.  “You’re so beautiful.…when you come undone…like that…” He bites back a groan from deep in his throat, as you buck your hips again, eyes crossing and then uncrossing as he draws forth more involuntary movements and sounds from your body.  It’s as if he’s controlling you like a puppet on strings.  You’re twitching and crying out on top of him and his hands are grazing every contour of your body until he lands on your tummy.  He squeezes the soft flesh as he moans.

“God you…make me…fuck…I’m gonna cum in you—” his breath hitches as he starts to get worked up, just moments away from his climax.

“Please fill me up daddy please...” you lean down to his ear, suckling his ear lobe as you slam your cunt onto him over, and over, and over again, deep and raw.  “…and stay inside…”

“What a nasty girl.…you really want to get knocked up tonight huh?” He sits up, pushing you onto your back and burying himself in you as he holds himself up, leaning over you, losing his composure with every passing second.  The initial sparks were brewing into a mean thunderstorm that was about to crack any second now.

“I do. I can’t do it without you Izuku…please…I’m gonna—” You can no longer form coherent sentences as your orgasm causes you to shift into speaking tongues.  Feeling your spasms, Izuku spills his seed deep inside of you as you both thrash and buck wildly, shuddering breathlessly against each other as your heart rates start to make the climb back down the mountain you had just reached the summit of.  You feel him softening inside of you and he’s kissing along your neck, collarbone, up your jawline to your lips, telling you how beautiful you are and how much he loves you and cares for you.  He’s the happiest you think you’ve ever seen him after sex, and you rub his back as he lays atop of you, the feeling of him inside of you calming you, bringing you comfort and peace in those post-coital intimate moments of bliss you spend with one another.