#ethrand tachonis

Ethrand Tachonis, you have hereby been sentenced to bear the title of The Loser of your family for the following crimes:

Botching the murder and celestial transformation of your brother (he doesn't even have sorcery magic, bro, how did you fuck this up so bad?)

Lie so terribly that the Cormoray and Einfasen immediately catch on to the fact that something is not right about whatever the fuck is going on with your family

Hot

GREAT hair

Engaging and interesting in conversation for ~5 minutes at a time, on multiple occasions

So, Occtis has a really hot, tall, fit (homicidal) goth older brother who likes to host parties and thinks sleeves are bullshit.

Move outta the way Ingrid Einfasen.

Ingrid:

Petra and Ryah: serial failed black widows

Koral: dead, previous relationship status unknown

[Unnamed Tachonis]: relationship status unknown

Frons: dead, previous relationship status unknown

Ethrand: no bitches

[Unnamed Tachonis]: relationship status unknown, but their older brother still has yet to get married, so chances are they haven't done much yet

Occtis: probably can't reproduce; has game but can't recognise it for shit